Original subtitles

Night calls, we're getting you all

Got your sweet and naughty girls

Gonna show you it all

Night calls, making dreams come true

If you got the balls, give us a call

You're on night calls

We caught the eye, in the eye of the storm

Caught your disease, it fell on the floor

Walking on ice, it's plain but thin

Losing my mind, I'm never letting you in

She said, I gotta pay to play

Never realize, I'll wait

Kiss the shit that's in, I'll take

Yeah, I'm coming out of New York, New York

Hey, bye

Call the doctor, call the priest

Call the crazy, I gotta pay

Take it all, you got me down

Can't keep it together when you're not around

Caught me bowed in your student game

She said, I gotta pay to play

Never realize, I'll wait

Night calls

Welcome to Night Calls

Tonight we've got the sexiest, horniest girls on TV

Yeah, baby

We've got raunchy comedian, Brandon Gibbs

And don't forget our band, The Bingen

Woo! Okay, so tonight's story, our topic is sex toys

If you have questions or stories, call us at 800-359-8100

Or you can email us at tonightcalls at playboy.com

Okay, so sex toys, there's so many different sex toys out there

There's vibrator still-dos, waterproof ones, rubber ducky ones

Strap-ons, whips, cuffs, I can't name everything that there is

There are so many, Jessie, but the main thing is that, guys

You should not be afraid to let your girls use sex toys

Exactly!

Right? Because it's just gonna enhance your sex life

It's not gonna take away from it, am I right?

You're right, just think about this, guys

You're always working about wondering to please the girl

And you don't know if you wanna do it

Well, if you fuck her from behind and let her use the vibrator

She's gonna get off faster and you can get off a lot quicker

And don't have to worry about her because she's taking care of herself

And ladies, you can get off like ten times his one, right?

Seriously, if you just hold that vibrator right on your clit

And let the guy fuck you, even if he's quick

You're still gonna get off way more than he does

And you know what? What's your favorite sex toy that you like to use personally?

My favorite? Well, I brought my favorite with me, are you kidding?

I wanna see, I wanna see

It is called Inner Desires

And it is by Doc Johnson

And it's fun, it's your favorite color

Oh, it's pink!

So I always think of you when I masturbate

Put it on your pussy

Put it on your pussy

Well, you gotta control the speeds for me, it's got four speeds

It has four different speeds

Okay, start me off at number one, Mitch

Start me off at number one

I think it's weak for her

It's weak

Two?

Yeah

Two's alright

Can you handle it?

Yeah

You can handle more than that, right?

I can't handle way more than that

Come on, crank me up, baby

Crank me up

You're at the bar!

Yeah

See, a lot of these vibrators have controls

And you can get like a heat stimulation

Squirt your own lube on it if you got a dildo or something

And some of them have heating sensors

So if your pussy's cold, it'll warm you up

What's your favorite sex toy, Jessie?

I wanna see what you like to play with

Okay, I personally love a pocket rocket

Do it again

Yeah

And of course it's pink

Of course it's pink

It's what it's all about

But let me tell you something

This is great for traveling girls

You wanna get something to travel like if you're alone

And you don't know if you're gonna have a one night stand

Or anything like that

You never know what happens

Always carry one of these around

They're very quiet, they're cute

They come in multiple colors

And they have these cute little tickler things

It is pretty strong

And it is just, you know, kind of quiet

Like you might hear it now

But it's microphones that you're hearing

Yeah

But I just love to sit there and rub it

And you rub it on the outside

Lick it a little bit first though, right?

That's what I do anyways with mine

I lick it and rub it

But this is the world's most popular sex toy

It sold billions

Well, you could stick mine inside you

Billions and billions and billions of women

From this

Lick it, lick it

All right, we got a caller, Jesse

And it's Kevin from Washington

Hi, Kevin

Hey, what's going on?

What are you doing?

Just looking at you hot girls

Really?

You like what you see, baby?

Oh, yeah

Really? What are you doing?

Do you have your big cock out, Kevin?

Yes, I do

Yeah?

Is it really hard?

Yes

Yeah?

You want to stick that cock in between my legs, baby?

Absolutely

Yeah?

Yes

Are you fucking me with that big hard cock?

Kevin, you don't mind if we fuck ourselves with our toys, do you?

Come on, Kevin

Give me that big fucking dick, baby

Oh, yeah, baby

You're making my pussy so wet it's dripping all over your cock down to your balls

Spread that pussy apart

Oh, and Kirsten's playing with my boobs

I'm gonna play with it too, baby

Come on

Yeah, baby

Come on, Kevin

Come all over

Spread that pussy apart

You bit me over and smacked my ass like I was bad, Kevin

She's a bad girl, Kevin

Come all over her ass

Get out

Kevin, come on my ass

Spread that ass apart

Spread that ass apart

He's still going

He's still going

Kevin, I'm like you

Unfortunately, we have to take the next call

Oh, yeah

Oh, sorry

Mark from Pennsylvania, what's up?

Hi, Jesse

Hi, how are you?

Good

What are you doing?

Do you have a story or any sex toys you like using, Mark?

I just want to know what kind of toys do you ladies like?

I use a lot of toys

I don't even know how many

I tend to make my own toys, actually

She does

Tell them about your creation

This thing is sick

It's the best thing ever

So I took, it's called the Impulse from Cal and Sonic

And it's a bullet, it's similar to this

Which is one of my favorites

And I have another toy called the Magic Dragon

Well, I cut off the head of the Magic Dragon

And I stuck it right on the Impulse

And it is the best thing ever

So if you can find those two toys

Make the combination

And your girl will go nuts

Serious

Fuck her

And then have her use that

She will come in 10 seconds

No word of a lie

So Mark, hang up the phone

And grab your girls

Go for it

You have the Kirsten Price guarantee on that one, baby

And it works, trust me

It works, I've used it on her

Oh, oh, we've used several things

But this thing was insane

And she like said, I created this thing

And I'm like, you're not sticking something you created and tore up

But it worked

But it did work

She was so lovely

Hey, let's go talk to people at the bar

Why don't you go?

Go see who's at the bar

Watch me walk away

So watch me walk away

Hi

What's up?

What's your name?

Cassandra

Cassandra

Is this your fucking nightclub studio?

Yes, it is

Are you having a good time?

So far I am, yeah

Yeah?

Awesome

And you have a little cutie right here next to you

Can I cry him over your rainbow?

What's your name?

Absolutely, Raquel

What's your favorite sex toy, Raquel?

I have a lot

But my favorite would be the Jackrabbit

Or anything that buzzes

Really?

And what does the Jackrabbit do to make you so get off an orgasm everywhere?

The bunny ears wrap around your clit and they vibrate really hard

That just makes me go

You know, I think that's the one Faye is using right now

Faye, what's up, Chica?

Hello

How are you?

Good

Hey, mister, can I show you?

Is that the Jackrabbit?

Of course it is

Oh, and it's pink

Gosh, you see?

Girls love pink

So this is a duel, right?

So what do you, how do you use your Jackrabbit?

I like turning it on and the vibrate

Uh-huh

Mm-hmm

Do you like the beady things?

That makes it pretty

Does it do anything?

Have you used it?

Does the beads tickle the outside part of your lips on your clit?

So it gets your clit stimulated and then it pokes it out of your pussy

And you're like, oh yeah

I'm just a little bit

It definitely feels so good

Yeah, they have to be good, right?

Guys don't have the beads on their cocks

Unless they got cock rings or something

Anal beads

Thank you, Faith

Thank you

Hi, how are you?

Good, how are you?

You having a good time?

Excellent time

You having a good time with Nichols?

Yeah

All right, first time?

First time

Uh, you gonna come back?

I'll come back

All right, and what's your name, baby?

Sammy

Hi, Sammy

Hi

First time to Nichols?

It is

Loving it?

Absolutely

All right, well we're having a good time

And you see my girlfriend up here?

Jazzy1, you are so smokin' hot

And that outfit is totally cute

Yes

Where did you get that outfit?

I actually got it at Playboystore.com

Really?

Do they have more outfits and different colors

And underwear and everything else?

And even toys?

They have all sorts of things

So if you want to look as hot as Jazzy

Even though it might be hard to

Because she's smokin' fine

Go to Playboystore.com

And you can get a lingerie

But, more importantly right now

Give me this

This is a magic wand

Magic, why?

See this big thing?

I'm turning it on high

It's like a back massager

Jazzy, will you take off your panties?

You're not getting the full effect

And it's

That's not good

So, you know, Jazzy

Why do you think this magic wand is a good sex toy?

I know why I think so

But tell the women listening out there

Even guys, so please tell the women what this does to you

How it turns you on

It just feels really fucking good

It's got its name for a reason

It vibrates really hard

I don't know if you can hear how hard it is

It's really powerful

I have my own power tool in my hand right now

I get into a controlled chassis

It plugs into the wall

So it doesn't use batteries

Oh, it doesn't use batteries

You have to plug it in

You know you're kinky when you just go straight for the plug-in

Oh, does that feel good?

Yes, it does

You like that?

Hey, Kirsten, what you doing over there, baby?

I am over here with the masters of masturbation

My good friend Samantha Ryan

She's fucking herself with this glass toy right now

Come for you, baby

Let me taste it

That feel good, Samantha?

Oh, yes

You love these glass toys, don't you?

I do, I love them because they're rock hard

They are rock hard

And what else can you do with this hard glass toy

That's going to get this tight little pussy off?

Well, sometimes I like to get it all nice and hot

So it makes my pussy all warm

And sometimes I like to make it nice and cold on a hot day

When I'm feeling really hot

Yeah

And don't forget, ladies and gentlemen

That these glass toys are dishwasher safe

Good tip, right?

Thank you, Samantha

And my good friend Charlie over here

Can you tell me what this thing is that you're riding on?

This, I believe, is called the Madame Butterfly

And Madame, she sure does me well

Does she do you well?

It's awesome because it's like hands-free

You can get into the moment, pretend the dude's, you know,

Underneath you and you're riding him

And just let go, pinch the nipples

Yeah, you're all about the nipple pinching, huh?

And does it have more speeds than just one?

Yes, it has actually four speeds

Which I haven't on the four-speed

Of course, as always

Yes, I have mom not on the four-speeds all the time

I want to watch you fuck that for a little bit

Just fuck it for me real good

Tell me how it feels

It feels good on my pussy, hard clit

You're vibrating so hard and making your pussy dripping wet

She's so wet

Her pussy is dripping all over this

Oh, yeah, Charlie

I can hear Josie over there

And what the fuck are you doing, bitch?

Don't come hard

Hi

Yay, that was so much fun

Up next, we got some really crazy sex toys

So hold on tightly, if you can

Oh

Got a dead-end job

Work and I ain't been much fun

I've been two weeks, I ain't got a lay

I've been two years, I ain't got a way

I bet this kid will choose a snitch

Los Angeles, Los Angeles, Los Angeles, yeah

Los Angeles, Los Angeles, Los Angeles, yeah

Los Angeles, Los Angeles, Los Angeles, yeah

Broken in a trap

Welcome back, everyone

We are talking about sex toys tonight

How many there are, why they're good, why we use them

And why boyfriends sometimes get jealous when we do

So, you know, every, if you're anybody in this industry

If you're a big porn name, you have your own toy line

You, well, except for Kirsten

Shut up, I do have my own line

It's just not out till next month

I know, I'm just teasing

She's the hottest bestest friend ever

Whatever

So, I actually behind you have a bunch of sex toys

This is my Jessie J's sex toy

This is Jessie J's line

By California's Dog Novelties

And I got a variety of stuff

I couldn't fit everybody there

But I have an actual molding of my ass

That's a guess

Does this look real?

So, I have just different things

I wanna compare this

Next time, you wanna compare my ass to my plastic silicone ass?

I do

You dropped my ba-dum-ba-dum

I sure did

Now, pull up that dress

What do you think, guys? Is it realistic?

You know, but we have different things

Like we have a travel pussy

In case you can't carry the ass and pussy to go

So, you can travel

You should go out and join the Maya High Club, right?

A little travel pussy

I have all sorts of vibrators

I have some that are waterproof

And they are like, fuck me

It tells you what to do, basically

Fuck me

You know what dildo's good with?

Eat me

Gives you direction

Play with me, I'm just horny right now

Boss, somebody get the point

Why don't I give you ice cream?

You know what? I wanna give presents

Who wants dildos?

Don't piss so much

For what sex toys? I have this made right here

Come here

Come stand right in between us

And what is your name, young man?

Nick

Nick, where are you from?

Yorba Linda

Nice

Yorba Linda

Would you like a Jessie Jane pussy and ass?

I think so

You wanna fuck me?

Because seriously, I don't do anal too well

But man, you don't even have the ass

You just throw that ass down

Fuck me

Got my weekend planned

All right

Well, I'm gonna give you this

All right, here

So, that's kind of grasses for you to aim

Oh, the whole thing

But we're gonna give you this

Yes, and look, it vibrates too

And you can put a silicone gel to make it like my pussy's wet like you're making me cum

Here you go

Which I hope you do

Go on, back to me

Take it off

I wanna find a girl

Take it off

You are so sexy and you know what?

Strap on

Strap on

All right, you should give away one more

One more

Who wants me to give them a blowjob?

See, you want a blowjob?

He wants a wet, sloppy blowjob

Get up here

These really are my lips

They molded them

And so I have a big mouth, see?

Is your cock big enough to fit into it?

Oh, you have no clue

Yeah?

Well, tell us what your name is

Can I give you a blowjob?

Say hi to Mom and Dad, Josh

Hi, Josh

Hi

Mom and Dad

It's not worth here

Hey, Mom and Dad

Dad, we're gonna give him a blowjob if you don't mind

Here you go

Thank you

For the Jessie J Virtual Sex Toy line

exclusively manufactured and distributed by California Exile Novelties

and available at SpiceTVStore.com

Okay, we have

We have

We have a caller on the line

and I believe it's Paul from Missouri

Hi, Paul

Hey, baby, what's up?

What are you doing?

I'm sitting here playing with my girlfriend with some toys

Oh, what kind of toys?

Just some dildos, just normal stuff

Really? Are they pretty and colorful?

We were kind of wondering if I could come for you

I want you to make your girl come for us

But we want to know

We want play-by-play

We want to know what toys would you like us to play with

so we can come for you

We've got an array

I want to play with this one

Just pick one out

I want to play with this one, Paul

It is a

It's like a

What the hell is this? A unicorn?

It's a unicorn

So I'm gonna go play with the unicorn

I'm just gonna do a fuck me dildo

Come on, ball

Let's go

All right, Paul

Tell us

Tell us how you want us, baby

I want one of you laying down with your legs

Up by your shoulders

And the other one on all fours

That'd be great

All right

I'll do all fours

Lay back, bitch

And fuck yourself

I gotta tell you that y'all are just making me so horrid

I'm sorry, baby

Paul, you want me to stick it in my pussy?

You want me to shove a cock in my pussy, baby?

Oh, hell yeah

Hell yeah

Oh, my God, it's so big

It barely fits

Come on, fucking spit on your cock, Paul

Oh, God

Get an extra one

Oh, you're doing it for me, baby

Paul, oh, my God

You want me to lick her pussy, Paul, while she fucks herself?

Yeah

And have your girlfriend suck in your balls

I'm gonna make her fucking poop, Paul

I'm gonna put it on your face, baby

That sounded like it felt really fucking good

Well, I gotta tell you, it did feel really good

Kirsten's the best

Thanks, Paul

We have Scott from Georgia

What's up, Scott?

You know what?

I think he's on your computer

No?

We got...

No

We got a webcam, Cole

Yes, we do

We did

Are you silly?

Look what you have

Sorry

Yes

I wouldn't lie to you, Jessie

I thought you were trying to trick me

No, we really do

Have a webcam copy

I'm just gonna jack off

Okay

Scott, hi

Hi

Are you there?

Are you there?

Wait, I think you have to hit...

Scott?

Did I turn it off?

Scott

All right, Scott

Well, then

Hi, Scott

Yeah

Oh, look, there he is

I can see him

Can you hear us?

He's...

Look, that's your doll

That's the Jessie Jane doll from Cal Exotic

And Scott looks like he's...

He wants to fuck her

Scott

Look, he's got pictures of you

He's got erotic

He's got...

Yeah

Scott

That's awesome

Oh, Scott

Well, we lost Scott, so...

Sorry, Scott

Better fuck next time

How about Rochelle from Alabama?

Rochelle?

Uh-huh

Hi

Um...

I would like to see the two young ladies on the couch

Eat each other up

Ooh, hey, I think it's my turn

I will eat you up

Yes

It's my turn

Show them how you lick it

Do it, baby

Rochelle

Yes

Show her how you lick it

Show her how you spit in my fucking wet little pussy

Ooh

What do you like, Rochelle?

Rochelle

Tell us what you like

I'm slowly licking her pussy lips

Oh, man

Teasing it

That's mine

Rochelle, do you like that, baby?

Yes

Is it getting you wet?

Yes

Do you want to fucking cum all over her?

Yes

Yeah, lick it, Jessie

Make Rochelle cum

Show her how you would fucking lick her pussy

Oh, Rochelle, this is you

Pretend I'm you

And this is what she would do

I am

Now cum all over her fucking tongue

Did you cum, Rochelle?

Yes

Right

That was very quiet

Thank you

Good, nonetheless

Hey, guess what?

Guess what?

Hey, this just beeped at me

Hold on

It beeped

Yeah, I don't know what it does

That means Scott's back

Nice

Scott

Scott

Scott

Hi

Hello

How are you?

Serious

Hey, what's up?

Oh, my God, nothing

I just ate Kirsten Price's yummy, yummy pussy

Oh, yeah?

Yeah

Don't you wish you did?

Oh, yeah

What are you doing there?

I'm trying to buy your doll, which is even better than that

Oh, no, no, no

Hey

Oh, yeah

Oh, yeah, I'm your biggest fan, Jessie

Fuck you, Scott

I'm out

Are you getting ready to do me, Scott?

Oh, yeah

I just blowed it up

Oh, yeah

You just blew it up?

Yeah, your mouth would feel pretty, baby

Are you full?

You got me all hot and full of air, ready to explode, bend you over and let you ride

I want to ride your cop reverse cowgirl

Oh, yeah?

Come on, Scott

Can I?

Can I ride a reverse cowgirl and you can smack my ass at the same time and pull my hair?

Yeah, Scott?

Are you rubbing your picks up on top?

I'll even let you stick it in my ass

Just grab my tits

How does it feel, Scott?

Oh, fuck yeah, Jessie

Oh

Scott, how does it feel?

Oh, it's so fucking tight

Yeah?

Oh, yeah

I have a tight little pussy

You better fucking tear it up, baby

I need your cuffs

Oh, yeah

Fuck yeah, Jessie

That's fucking tight

Come on, give it to me

Come on

Come on, fucking cum in my plastic pussy

Oh, yeah

Come on, you know you'll want to

Ah

You can wash it out later, Scott, no worries

Oh, yeah

Come on, just suck

Scott, even cum in my mouth, it's already open, baby

Oh, yeah

I want to taste your cum and swallow it and spit the rest of it back on your cock and start sucking it again

Oh, yeah

Come on, pull it out of my ass

Come on, cum in me

Put it in my mouth

Put it in my mouth

Ah

Ah

Ah

Come on

Come on

Come on

Come on

Come on

Fuck

Oh, yeah

I believe he can

Thank you, Scott

Oh, thank you

I love me some Georgia peaches, so that was a good old time

Thank you

Here, let me take your computer

Okay

So, all right

Speaking, our topic again today is sex toys

Why we love using them on the different platforms

What they do internally, externally, and whatever, and how guys, husbands, or boyfriends, sometimes just really get jealous because they're thinking they're not doing their job because their girlfriend just wants to get off with a vibrator

And the news is we just like that

It helps you and it's not an offense unless you really do suck a bed

But

You know what I heard, Jessie?

I heard that your assistant, Chris, has a problem with his girlfriend masturbating

Oh, yeah, Chris

What's up with that, Chris?

Come here

Why don't you come over here and tell us what's up with that?

Come here

Get your ass over here

What's up?

What's up?

Oh

Oh

Yay

Yay

Yay

So what's the deal, Chris?

We hear that you don't like the fact that your girlfriend masturbates

What's going on?

I don't mind if she masturbates, that's not the big deal

The big deal is that she used the big deals

Like big

Yeah, like that shit

Jumbo!

Come here

That's too big

What can you do with that?

It is ridiculous, Chris

It's ridiculous, Chris

Can you suck that?

If you can suck that

Chris, can you suck it?

Hell no, I'm not even going to try to

She want me to like jump in the person

So the problem is that you think you can

Pick three

Look at that, wow, that's talent

Alright, so tell me, Chris, does it make you feel not manly enough when a girl uses a vibrator on you?

A lot

Yeah, yeah

Am I flustering you?

No, you ain't flustering me

You're cool, you was actually about to get me

Yeah, you was about to get the few inches of

Was I going to get the big oh?

You was about to get the big oh, yeah

Well, you know what, Chris, I'm going to help you out

So when your girlfriend wants to use a sex toy

It's this thing, and it is

We call it clona willy

And what it is, is you can make your own rubber cocky copy

A cocky?

A copy of your own cock

You mold your own cock basically

And your girlfriend can fuck herself with it

And it vibrates too

Chris, let's go make your cock

So what we're going to do, go mix your cock

I get to make my own cock?

Go do it

And you know what?

Make a crowd, Chris

Make a crowd

Alright

We're going to check back at the end of the show

And see how his cock comes out

But coming up next, we've got comic Brandon Gibson

Stay with us

We're going to check back at the end of the show

And see how his cock comes out

But coming up next, we've got comic Brandon Gibson

Stay with us

Alright

We're going to check back at the end of the show

And see how his cock comes out

But coming up next, we've got comic Brandon Gibson

Stay with us

Alright

We're going to check back at the end of the show

And see how his cock comes out

But coming up next, we've got comic Brandon Gibson

Stay with us

Welcome back to Night Calls

Welcome back to Night Calls

We've got some crazy fucking machines

We've got some crazy fucking machines

From fuckingmachines.com

We sure do

And Jassy over here

What is this that you're using?

I believe

I believe it's called the intruder, correct?

Sounds right

Yes, it's a nice green cock for you

Can you show us how that works?

Sure can

Got 0 to 10 so I can just tell fast I want to get fucked

Can you show us?

I'll show you how fast it goes

And this is good because

Girls, when you're masturbating

You don't always want to use your hands

Because it's not as realistic

It's not like, you know, when you're fucking a guy

It's just, you don't use your hands

So when you're masturbating

Why would you want to use your hands?

I know, girls just open their legs

And let the guys do all the work

Here, Jassy

The intruder do all the work

Now tell me, Jassy, what speed do you like the best?

1 through 10

5 sounds good

Do 10

I dare you

I like it hard and rough

That looks like it feels good

I am in love with you

And I just want to bang you

Nice

That's hot, Jassy

Hey, we got Charlie over here

And what are you on, Charlie?

Charlie?

That's the sound fucker

It's the sound fucker

That is nice

And this is the latest in technology here

Everybody's going to have sound fuckers

You want to play a game?

Alright, so this sound fucker

Only it vibrates when

on a touch of music

So let's try each instrument out

Just to make sure it works

Where do you think we should go first?

Drums?

Yes

So this senses the drums

Every time he beats on the drums

This vibrates into her pussy

So that was nice, but what do you feel about maybe

A little bit of guitar on it?

Do you like the guitar, Charlie?

I love the guitar

Oh yeah, but can you handle a bass?

Can you handle a bass?

Wait, is that feeling good, baby?

You know what, we want to give you a present

Can y'all all do it at the same time

And maybe she'll get like the ultramarine

All together

Don't you like that, lady?

Charlie!

Charlie, describe how that felt

Describe what it did to your pussy

It rocked my world

I like

The last one made me cry

She can't even talk right now

So you know it works

It definitely works

You look hot, that was our gift to you

That was for you

And the band, you know

Thank you, get off that ultimate

I fucked the whole band

And you fucked the whole band

So we have a caller

His name is William and he's from Mississippi

Hi William

Do you have any stories about

Sex toys or comments for us?

Well you know, you keep talking about

Men are a little bit intimidated by sex toys

Personally, myself

I'm not intimidated one bit

I've got one called The Progressor

What's that like?

You know it's a little silver bullet

That goes inside of a little plastic

Rubber piece that wraps around my cock

You know when you're fucking her in her pussy

Doggy style or in her ass

It vibrates all up inside her really good

And it feels so good

I have never heard of anything like that

William, will you come demonstrate on Kirsten and I?

Anytime, any day

I haven't had sex today

Well, like since this morning

So he's in Mississippi

So he can pick a red eye

There you go, she's going to come fuck you

Well thank you for telling us about that

Really cool toy and I'm going to go out

And get one for the next guy that I fuck

For sure

Alright, thank you, so anytime you want to

Get off on a call, go to PlayboyLife.com

They have lots of hot girls ready to

Fuck you live and get you up

Yeah baby

So we have this guy here and he actually

Has a show on PlayboyTV and it's called

Totally Busted and what Totally Busted

Is, is it's like a hidden camera

Show and he goes around and basically

Pranks people and he's a really

Really funny guy

And his name is Brandon Gibson

Let's bring him out

We have a clip of him

We're going to educate you a little bit about the vagina

What would you call this here?

That's the opening

There's a lot of things we're going to teach you today my man

There you go

Perfect, you're going to be a real TV star

Do you feel like a TV star?

Well you should, and you know why?

Because you're on TV right now

You're on Totally Busted on PlayboyTV

So that's his little camera show called

Totally Busted

And you can watch that right here on PlayboyTV

And here is

Brandon Gibson

You're having a good time, say yeehaw

Yeehaw

You country fuckers

Time for a little comedy, that's right

Nothing like a good stand up to break up the monotony

Of a bunch of hot chicks fucking each other, right?

Yes, yes

Look at all the sex toys

Sitting around here

By the way, I have one of those make your own cock kits

Yeah, I shove some silly putty in a thimble

That's right

That's right

That's right

That's right girls, I'm hung like a parakeet

My dick is so small

Looks like my pelvis is hitchhiking

Thank you very much

That's right

Yeah, thought I had a hair till I peed through it

That's right folks

I'm just being serious

You know, actually

I don't mind being around these

Because you see these things

I'm not so intimidated by these things

Because, let's face it

They go out of control with some of these things, you know?

Like this big fucking thing over here

I actually saw this on a tank in some old golf war footage

This thing, did you see that?

Fucking huge, that's dangerous

You should watch yourself, ma'am

So I think

You should see the big cock arsenal we have backstage

Just insane the amount of sex toys back there

They have this one that's just out of control

It's a big huge white

12 inch long, like 4 inches thick

And it spins and bends and twists

And fucking lights up and it sings

Rock you like a hurricane

And has the nerve

On the side of the box to say

Now more realistic

Yeah

Poor shit, okay?

That's not realistic and I'm going to tell you why

First of all, you want to make a 12 inch cock

You can't make it white, alright?

Second of all

Thank you ma'am, that's good

I'll be the funny one here

Second of all

A real cock, it didn't bend and twist

And light up and fucking sing

Hair band classics, okay?

And if it did, I'm pretty sure it would

Fucking hurt, okay?

Thirdly, you want to make it real

If you really want to make it real

Have it fuck you at 100 miles an hour

For 2 minutes, spew in your hair, go limp

Eat a ham sandwich and go to fucking sleep

That's what will make it real

And you know, I watch a lot of television

And it's funny to me because I think

I see all these things and my mind always wanders

To who in TV land is like really freaky

You know, and uses this shit all the time

And one of my favorite shows is the Andy Griffith show

You guys like that show? One of my favorites

And something tells me

That Barney Fife has a little bit of a freak side

To him, you know what I mean?

Like I can see Barney Fife completely being like

The town porn producer or something

Instead of the town deputy, you know?

That'd be great, and the conversations with Andy would be a lot different

Wouldn't they? He'd be like, well you know

Andy, Andy, Andy

Andy

Aunt B used to be one of my best bitches

I mean, she'd give you a dirty Sanchez for a 10 spot

Donkey punch, jelly donut, icy Mike

Chili dog for 15, I'm telling you Andy

She was the bomb

She would strap on a double dong dildo

And ride you like a Harley on a bad stretch of road

But Andy

I just can't get her to blow me

I've tried everything

I tried dressing it up like a snow cone

She just won't suck it

Won't lick the balls, caress them

You know how you should do, Andy

Floyd does it to you

But I'll tell you one thing, Andy

Whether she's sucking or fucking

Come on and bitch better have my money

That's it for me, thank you guys very much

You've been great

Oh

Fuck

He was funny

Anyway, coming up next we get a new girl naked

For the very first time here on Nikon

I can change if you give me time

I can change, I can change

I can try and get you out this time

But this is not

an idea of your time

This is not

an idea of your time

This is not an idea of your time

It's over

It's over

It's over

It's over

Welcome back everybody

Just to remind you we are talking about

sex toys tonight if you can't already tell

Like I'm not just standing here, masturbating

Guess what look what I have right here

What is that? This is a remote

then guess what it does.

It controls Cody's pussy.

This is a remote control thing

where you can put the remote control panties on a girl

and you can control the vibrations with your remote

and you have all the power and she doesn't have the power.

Cody, how does that feel?

It feels fucking fabulous.

You like this?

Remote control flip-glasser on Cody right now.

And I like to have control

because she can't tell him to stop

because I got the buttons, I got the off switch.

You know what's really cool about that?

Is you could take a girl out to dinner,

be it your wife, your girlfriend, whatever,

strap that on her and in the middle of dinner

with all your friends, just fucking get her off

right there at the table.

You can be like, she's all, oh yeah,

give me some more soup, oh, oh, I need an order note clamshell.

And then she's gonna be that much more horny

when you take her home

because she may have come like 18 times at the table

but she is just gonna be ready for some cock

when you get her back to the crib.

You know what I mean?

That's how you, seriously, sex toys

can enhance your life as a couple.

It's not just for the girl, it's for the guy.

And let me tell you something right now.

Cody, are you feeling great

because you're actually really turning me on?

Is it good, you wanna come?

You get to come?

While Cody's getting ready to come, let me tell you,

I've worked with this guy, have you fucked with Cody?

I have fucked Cody, yes.

I love fucking Cody.

In fact, I shot a movie with her

for Digital Playground Marvelous

and I got to lick those big, huge tits of hers,

grab them and slap them and suck on her nipples.

Oh, she has an ass to die for.

She's pretty young too, how old are you, Cody?

She's just a baby.

She's a baby and I'm taking advantage of her

by looking her and raping her and doing whatever I want.

You're a perv, Jessie.

I know, and you know what,

I got to even write with her on lipstick,

kind of like a victorious, like whatever,

secret thing, signature thing, I just signed my name.

I was like, thanks, XOXO, Jessie.

You autographed her body.

I autographed her body or I ravished her

in every way possible.

Well, I'm definitely gonna go get Marvelous

from Digital Playground, that is for sure.

That is so hot.

Oh, she's so hot.

Look at the girl that's up there with her.

That's Melissa.

Hi, Melissa.

Melissa is a hot little mama too

and she's playing with a toy that is called Rub My Ducky

and it's a little massager and it's very discreet.

It is, it's just, you can keep it in your house

and nobody knows what it is.

You don't have to have this big old dong laying around

and your housekeeper comes over and she's like,

what the hell, you're a freak, man.

And don't let the appearance fool you.

Those things are very powerful.

They have three different speeds and they rock

and it's like, oh.

They don't rock as much as this though.

Yeah, and they're waterproof, so, you know.

She can take it in the bathtub.

It doubles as a bath toy, but it's a lot of fun.

So Rub My Ducky.

And I know you can put it in your suitcase

and nobody's gonna think of it because I know,

I'm sure this has happened to you, Kirsten,

anytime I travel, because I can't forget my vibrators

in case I don't sleep with somebody.

Which I usually do, that's okay.

But you don't have to be embarrassed

because I'm never embarrassed,

but I know some people are embarrassed

when they pull out your dildos,

your Hitachi big old vibrator machines and stuff.

So it's Rub My Ducky.

They're gonna think you have a kid.

This is what comes out of my suitcase.

That's what comes out of hers.

You know, it just happens.

Yeah, and I want to introduce you to somebody right now.

Okay.

You know, every week, I tell you to go to sugardvd.com

and fill out an entry form.

This is Cassandra.

Hi.

Come on over, baby.

Hi.

Hi.

Nice to meet you.

Sit down.

Thanks.

Cassandra got online at sugardvd.com

and registered.

You can also go to nightcalls.com on Playboy TV

and register to come on nightcalls.

They fly you out here, even put you up in a room,

give you some spending cash,

and all you have to do is get naked on the show.

Oh yeah, baby.

Yeah.

And why don't you just stand up for us?

I want to see this body.

Tell us where you're from as I untie your shirt.

I'm from New York and I'm an artist

and I'm really nervous and excited right now.

So your friends actually sent in your picture, am I correct?

My friends actually did.

And they think you're so hot

that they want you to just do this right now, right?

They're watching, right?

Yes, they're watching right now.

Say hi to your friends while I take your time.

Hi, Lauren.

Hi, friends.

We got your friend, Naked.

Do a little spin.

Show us the booty.

This is her first time being naked on TV.

Woo!

How do you feel?

I feel sweet.

We have to be nude, too.

Okay, yes.

How do you feel?

Don't be nervous.

I feel good.

Yeah?

Yeah.

Do you have a girl?

No.

No?

No.

Aw.

She's never been with a girl before.

You are so sexy.

Oh, ooh, ooh, ooh.

Present.

I think it'd be okay if we gave you a present.

Can we give you a present?

Sure, I want a present.

Cassandra, it won't scare you away.

See that hottie, Samantha?

Samantha Ryan.

Gorgeous girl hair.

A present.

Ooh.

Every girl, we just asked you to get naked,

but do you mind maybe trying out the Jack Hammer Johnson?

Sure.

I will.

All right, let's do this.

Yeah!

She's gonna do it!

Okay, I will show you how this works.

Okay, you're gonna stick this in you.

Like so.

Okay.

And then you pump it, like this.

And it goes.

And you just suck yourself like that.

So you can just jack yourself up.

Let me lube it up for you.

And I'll hold it while you lube it.

Because you gotta get it.

Ooh, rub it all around.

Get it nice and wet, because.

But the wetter it is, the less you're gonna feel it, so.

Okay.

You'll be all right.

Stick that right on in there.

Oh my god.

Woo!

Oh my god.

Oh.

Oh my god.

Oh my god.

Does that feel good?

It's like, it's like she's jacking off like a dune.

Oh, oh, oh.

Oh my god.

Where's her?

Man, you like it?

Yeah, can I keep it?

You can keep it.

It's yours, it's yours.

You know what?

Thanks.

Let's go to the bar.

Can I continue?

Come with me.

Come with me, and we can go play at the bar.

I'll take advantage of you,

even though it might not take much to do so.

Woo!

Now while you're playing with that,

I would like to invite all you hot girls out there

to submit your photos and come on night calls.

Just go to sugardvd.com

and fill out an entry form.

And you can be fucking yourself at the bar,

just like our friend Cassandra.

Woo!

Woo!

Woo!

Woo!

Woo!

All right, Chris.

Hi Chris.

What's up?

What you doing?

Uh, I just got through making my thing.

You made your cock?

I made my cock.

You really?

I made my cock, I did.

Everybody want to see the results?

I do.

Yeah!

Give me your cock, Chris.

Are you ready for this?

Are you really ready for this?

I am.

This is the exact replica of Chris' cock.

What is it?

Ha!

Ha!

Ha!

Ha!

Ha!

Ha!

Christopher.

Christopher.

Hey, that's me!

Yeah, right!

That is me!

You are the biggest honkerhead liar ever.

And I am the biggest cock man.

Chris, you ain't fooling me.

Okay, all right, well I-

Bring out your cock.

I didn't have enough,

I didn't have the mix for the black cop.

Really?

So, the-

He might be making up a piece.

So, here.

Right now, I'll be right there.

There you go.

There you go.

Wow!

This is a little crooked, but you know,

I didn't exactly follow the directions.

It's cute.

Hey, but it's not the length, it's not the length.

What's this curve?

It's how you-

It's my curve ball.

Well, it's pretty much touching your balls,

cause it ain't that big, Chris.

This is about how you work it, anyway.

Oh yeah, can you work it?

You know what, Chris, just cause I love you,

I'm gonna fuck you right now, and-

Mm, is that right?

Yeah, I don't know very-

Yeah, yeah.

I wanna know what your cock is.

Woo!

So, you gotta work it right, though.

There you go, I take it off.

It's hard to get around that corner.

That corner, see, that corner's a bitch, ain't it?

It's a curve.

I think you're a currier.

Yeah!

Yeah!

You definitely got a curve ball, a Chris curve ball.

So, if you wanna clone your own cock,

go to cloneawilly.com to make your molds of your cocks,

and then, Kirsten, why don't you tell us,

what's the title contest?

Well, just, you know, you send your cocks to us,

and we'll fuck him on the show.

We'll bring us your cocks, and I'm gonna fuck them all,

like, gah, gah, gah, gah, gah.

Why don't you bring that cock over here,

and we'll fuck that one.

You wanna start with this one?

And I want all you hot bitches

to get over here on my couch right now.

You, you!

You, you, you, you.

Come on, let's all fuck ourselves.

Love the toys.

Let me, let me, girls!

Come here, let's fuck ourselves.

Let's all come over here, and we're gonna fuck ourselves.

I want you to all come over here,

and we're all gonna fuck ourselves right now.

And, Chris, I'm putting your cock down,

I fucked you already, so.

All right.

Let's fuck, ladies!

Girls, grab the toy, turn them on,

and let's rock it.

Fuck yourselves, fuck yourselves!

Oh, okay, okay, no, you can't.

You can't, you can't, you can't, you can't.

No, that was so good.

Oh my God!

Thank you, everybody!

It's our guest, we're back live on Friday, June 2nd.

Private calls us next.

Good night!

Woo!

Woo!

Yeah!

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!

Woke up this morning in a castle.

If you wanna see more of Jesse, go to jessiejane.com.

Or, to get Jesse's exclusive digital playground movies,

go to spicetvstore.com.

Toys on Night Calls were provided by Doc Johnson,

the world's largest manufacturer of adult toys and novelties.

Visit docjohnson.com.

Check out sugardvd.com,

where you can rent or buy thousands

of today's hottest adult DVDs,

video-on-demand, and even sex toys.