All language subtitles for Twice in a Lifetime s02e07 The Escape Artist.eng

It's like Jekyll and Hyde. And on the
weekends, he's Mr. Hyde.

Well, it sounds like we're making
progress.

Yes, so what I'm hearing is when it
comes to weekends, you have different

agendas. All the other wives bring their
husbands.

Bully for them.

Yeah, Ted, with love in your heart, of
course, do you think you could tell her

how you feel?

I know your chari... I

know

your charities are important to you, but
every weekend is just too much. I feel

too pressured.

Good, Ted. You're communicating your
needs. You're creating room for

Right, which is the cornerstone of all
healthy relationships.

That's all the time we have for today.

So why don't the both of you go work on
your give

-and -take agendas, and then we'll...
We'll continue this discussion next

Bye -bye. Bye -bye now.

What's so funny? Your hair.

What's wrong with my hair? Oh, nothing.

It's perfect.

Except for that thing sticking out of
the back of it.

Oh, for the love of... Love?

have waited for me this morning instead
of driving off like a demented speed

racer. You overslept. My alarm didn't go
off.

Did it ever occur to you to knock on my
bedroom door?

What if I had died in my sleep?

Well, then I apologize, okay? And next
time I'll come in and poke you with a

stick.

I certainly know where your bedroom is.
I'll just follow the sound of the

snoring.

I'm off to play golf.

Good day.

See you at the lawyer's.

What? Oh, hi, Mommy.

No, no, don't push him in front of the
car.

It says Wackenbush here. What is that?

That's right. I'm Mr.

Wackenbush Scott. Scott Wackenbush.
That's wonderful.

Sounds like we're making progress.

Mr. Posey would like to retain full
ownership of the BMW.

Yes. exercise equipment, the home
entertainment center, and all of its

All. In exchange, Mrs. Posey would
remain sole owner of the sports utility

vehicle. Which I paid for. All home
furnishings. All.

All kitchen appliances.

All. And retain full custody of Charlie.
We have a problem with the Charlie

issue. We sure do.

No, no, no.

Charlie is not an issue. He is a King
Charles Spaniel. Mine. I rescued him

the shelter. Charlie was a gift to me.
Me, from Mother's Day, remember?

Yeah, I remember. Like when it mattered.

He's my boy.

See, what did I tell you? He compensates
by identifying with Charlie as a

surrogate son. Look at her. She's the
one that carries it around in a snuggly

like a baby.

It's the flowers. He's allergic.

Dog issue for now.

We need to discuss the dissolution of
your psychotherapy practice, the

from the book, and the sale of the
farmhouse in Lancaster.

I assume you're both amenable to a 50
-50 split.

Over my dead body?

He's not a baby. He's a dog. You
wouldn't have a baby.

How scary.

One would have to make love to have a
baby, wouldn't one? Well, you're the one

that insisted on separate bedrooms.

Let's take a pop quiz, see where your
marriage stands.

I love these things.

Question number one.

Do you call each other pet names?

Chris. Chris Potts. Okay, then, moving
right along.

Question number two.

During the past two months, how often
have you touched, kissed, pledged your

love, and or done sweet things for each
other? A, frequently. B, occasionally.

C, seldom. Okay, I'm taking Charlie.
Simple as that.

D, never.

Never!

Is that your final answer?

What?

Ah!

Two in there, and then another two.

Move it! You maniac, let him in!

Oh, come on. Not like this. Not in here.

For better or for worse, remember?

Sickness then and health.

Till death do us part.

You could change the world.

Rearrange your world.

Take one, divide by two.

If it was only up to you to change.

Hey, these truck drivers act like they
own the road. They're up there all night

long drinking coffee until they just
blow like that and they don't see what's

going on. They don't see anything.

Relax. Bad part's over.

And in your case, that's pretty bad.

Were we in an accident?

Yeah, call an ambulance.

It's too late for that.

You mean we're dead?

Oh, we can't be dead. We still have to
pick up Charlie at Doggy Daycare.

It's okay.

He's in good hands, and so are you.

Pitiful harvest season.

Too much stormy weather. Not unlike your
marriage, wouldn't you say?

Who are you? Judge Othniel. He's come to
decide your fate.

Our fate?

Sometimes it takes a true crisis to
bring out true love.

True love.

Them.

I think you're wrong about this one,
Judge. See, they just killed each other.

Well, it was her fault.

It was your fault.

See what I mean?

On the contrary, true love never dies.

I see where all three of you need to
learn the same lesson. How am I going to

learn about love from two people who
hate each other?

What is it that you regret most in your
life? Besides totaling your beamer.

The moment I said I do.

I second that.

Then that's a perfect place to start.
And do you, Mindy, take this man to be

your lawfully wedded husband?

To have and to hold.

Sickness and in health. For as long as
you both shall live.

Matthew! Matthew!

And I do.

By the power vested in me by the state
of Pennsylvania, I now pronounce you

husband and wife. Man, what happened?

Where did all that love go?

It didn't go anywhere. They were married
under the eyes of God.

And he's never stopped blessing you.

Why, he even provided you the gift to
help other people repair their broken

marriages. You just lost faith in your
own. Yeah, well, some marriages can't be

fixed. You see, some husbands are
fundamentally flawed. And some wives

from blushing brides into ice queens on
their honeymoon.

That's where this all started? On your
honeymoon?

Yes.

Splendid! What is splendid about it?

You will have three days and three days
only to rectify the misunderstandings

that arose during your marriage.

You'll go back with your memory intact,
but no one else will recognize you. You

are free agents of the universe with the
blessing of God Almighty and his God.

Wait!

What is he talking about?

He's giving you a second chance to save
your marriage.

Whether that book of yours might come in
handy.

I don't want a second chance.

Judge, he didn't mean that. You have to
forgive him. Why?

You didn't.

I thought you were gone. I didn't

know where you were.

Where are we?

Need some service here.

Yes, sir.

We need to talk to the manager. It's an
emergency.

It's him. It's that guy.

We need to see the manager.

You are the managers.

What?

Ralph and Alice.

Judge Othniel watches a lot of TV.

How could you let him send us back here?
I can't tell Othniel what to do.

I wouldn't want to.

Well, sometimes I would, but, you know,
he's brilliant and wise.

And besides, he's my boss.

No, we are your bosses now, so get it
out of here.

No.

I can't do that.

Othniel already made his ruling.

You have three days to save your
marriage.

You can't just walk away.

Oh, yeah?

Watch it.

You all right?

Here, let me help you.

Here, I'm sorry.

Sorry, pal. Here you go.

1975?

That's impossible.

Back then, you thought everything was
possible. We were young and naive. Now

we're... On your honeymoon.

What?

That's...

Hi.

Is there a problem with the reservation?

Yeah. Sorry, we're all sold out.

Have a nice day?

No, no, no, no. No problem at all.

Welcome to Swept Away.

Alice and Ralph Bliss, the managers of
this fine establishment, would be happy

to accommodate you. Excuse me.

Grace.

Oh, honey.

What are you doing? What are you doing?
I'm trying to help you.

When your three days are up, you're
going to be sent to the land down under.

I don't mean Australia. I'm talking fire
and brimstone.

Okay, so what I'm hearing is that unless
we make our younger selves remain in a

state of marital bliss for 72 hours...
We're toast.

Well, you look at that. Our honeymoon
suite just opened up.

Yes, it's the one with the separate
beds.

Separate beds?

The honeymoon suite has only one bed.

So, if you have no further
requirements... Oh,

one thing.

Just wondered, which way are the tennis
courts?

Tennis? No, no. No tennis.

What? Why not? Yeah, why not?

Well, at least not by yourself.

No, it has to be doubled.

We don't allow honeymooners to play
tennis by themselves. No, it's house

Why?

You remember what happened to your
brother?

Oh.

He wasn't even playing tennis. He was
just watching it on TV.

Awful.

Okay.

Gotcha.

She stood there like a statue. I went
for it.

And that is when I threw my back out.

And that's what ruined our honeymoon.

No, no, that's not what ruined our
honeymoon.

Oh, no? What did? Well, it was a
gorgeous day, much like today. In fact,

today. And I thought we'd go out there
and hit the ball around, you know, have

little fun.

And that's when I discovered his
psychological obsession with winning.

You know, I have spent ten years of
hypnotherapy softening my competitive

and you know it.

Great.

You better get out there and soften his
competitive edge before it stabs you in

the back again and kills you both.

That is my racket.

Yeah, like it matters.

Oh, for the love of... Back to you.

La, la, la, la.

Gesundheit. Thank you.

So funny. Oh, sorry. It just, it looked
funny.

Well, sweetie, not everyone can be a
tennis pro.

Like Greg Winston.

You know Greg Winston?

Who's Greg?

Well, he's only the guy that Alice was
in love with back in college.

Oh, what a coincidence. We know Greg
Winston, too. Obviously a different

with the same name. Who served as it,
anyway?

Yeah, Greg used to be my roommate.

He and Mindy dated for a little while.

But then I met Mark.

And the rest, as they say, is history.

Can we get back to playing now?

You sure that's such a good idea?

He's right, Ralph. Let's stop. You know
this game isn't going to end well. But

we're winning.

Not for long.

Yeah.

It's 30 -40. Come on. Let's play.

Heads up.

Get him. You got it.

I'm trying to say something.

What is it, honey?

Deuce. Do you want it? No,

I'm fine. I just... I just gotta walk it
off.

It just surprised me, that's all.

Okay, I'll just do one second.

Are you ready, honey?

Close.

Hey.

Okay. I'm coming out.

Okay.

You look great.

I'll be ready in a minute. Oh, you poor
baby.

You are not going anywhere.

I'm sorry.

I ruined our honeymoon.

Nothing can ruin our honeymoon.

Hey, in sickness and in health,
remember?

Sometimes I love you so much it scares
me.

I love you so much. I'm never scared.

Hey.

Honey, you forgot something.

Oh, the love.

That's what I love about you.

Here we are, about to go out for dinner,
and you've got a big old curler stuck

in your head.

Come here.

Okay,

you just take it easy, sweetheart.

The pain pills should kick in really
soon.

Are you hungry?

I'm going to order room service.

No, no.

Honey, come on. We have a reservation.

I mean, it's our honeymoon.

You should go.

You know what?

are gonna order let's see they have
chinese they have italian

honey they have burgers and fries

Mindy?

Mindy? Hello?

You know what, Mindy? I don't think
she's here.

Greg?

Good evening, Richard.

Good evening, sir.

Your usual table? Uh -huh.

Look at me.

I look so... Happy.

Yeah, we were happy once upon a time.

Until one night.

Tonight, in fact.

Hi.

Me? Oh, hi.

I didn't realize.

Where's your other half?

Uh, he's upstairs.

Bad back.

Where's yours?

Long story.

Who's that guy?

The guy I met.

A young newlywed whose bride was afraid
to get married.

How convenient.

Oh, it was.

I helped put their marriage on track. It
was my first case.

But it didn't work for us.

Yeah.

Do you want to talk about it?

Yeah, I'd like that.

Well, why don't you join me?

It's not good to isolate you, especially
when you're upset.

We'll talk.

We'll figure this all out.

You know, you always did your best work
with men in conflicted relationships.

Except for one.

Oh, did I mention that he was also a
jeweler?

Jeweler?

That's quite a ring you've got there.

Isn't it wonderful?

It belonged to my husband's great -great
-grandmother.

After she lost everything in the potato
famine, she held on to this ring.

She ate radishes.

She died with it on after 60 years of
marriage.

And she gave it to my husband.

And she said that the woman who wore
this ring would bring him everlasting

happiness.

I love a ring with history.

Mind if I take a closer look?

Oh.

Oh, look.

He's about to appraise that token of
love you gave to me.

Really?

What is it?

Is there something wrong?

How well do you know the man you
married?

We met three weeks ago.

Why?

It's... It's the cubic zirconium.

Cubic zirconium?

Difficult for the untreated cell.

Cubic what?

Nice one, though.

It's a fake.

That ring was not around during the
potato famine.

That it belonged to your great -great
-grandmother. That she ate radish.

Radish. To keep her wedding ring.

For the love of... What she did.

Not... Not that one.

My great -great -grandmother's ring.

Ew. Just a little chip.

And see, I wanted to make an impression.

Oh, you did.

Yeah? Yeah, well, I don't care what you
say, Greg, okay? Because she married me,

not you.

Ah!

Well, where have you been?

Dinner. How was that?

Inviteful.

So, guess who called?

Take a wild guess.

I don't know, your great -great
-grandmother?

She's dead.

Is she?

I couldn't be sure.

But I told you. You did. But things
change, don't they, Mark?

Oh, the truth doesn't change.

You're right.

You're so right.

What would you say is the most important
element in a relationship, Mark?

Trust?

You got it.

Where are you going?

I am going to find a radish.

What?

Oh.

That was close.

Yep.

But we're not.

Close.

And already they've started to pull away
from each other.

Well, at least you know why.

About the ring.

I just wanted to give you something that
represented how much I loved you.

If I had given you that puny ring, you
just would have laughed.

Is that who you think I am?

No, you're right.

No, that's who I am.

I'm the guy who thinks he isn't enough,
not for a girl like you.

How can you think that?

A lifetime of practice.

I wasn't enough, was I? Of course you
were enough. It was the lie that drove

crazy. I felt like a fool, like I didn't
know you. I suspected everything you

told me. Then why did you stay?

I mean, to prove to the naysayers that
you couldn't make such a big mistake? I

mean, it was a just...

It's just three simple words.

Can you search your soul and say them?

Yes, I can do that.

I forgive you.

Oh, it felt so good to finally say that.

forgive you.

Yeah.

That's all.

There's nothing else.

Well, it's not conditional. It's just
three simple words. I forgive you. You'd

like it to be that simple.

Wouldn't you? That way, you wouldn't
have to face up to your role in any

of this. What role? What are you talking
about?

Oh, I don't think you know what the
truth is anymore.

I can't live a lie anymore.

Sorry. I'd rather be dead.

Mar?

What?

Smith? Sorry.

I'm working the front desk.

Honeymooners are very demanding.

How's it going?

Terrible. I've been so busy convincing
myself that I didn't love my husband, I

overlooked something so obvious.

What's that?

Maybe he never really loved me.

Now that one, I didn't see coming.

Think of all the marriages you've saved.

You can save this one.

You just have to figure out why he's so
shut down.

I know, I know. I just don't know what
it is.

Honest. Are you being honest, Mindy?

As honest as you can be.

I can honestly tell you that I'm
heartbroken because I just realized

tragic.

I love my husband.

No, that's not tragic.

That's a miracle.

And I think he loves you, too. Do you?

Because right now I'd wear a dozen fake
wedding rings if I knew he loved me.

Then tell him. Oh, he won't listen to
me.

Maybe it's because you're talking to the
wrong mark.

Benji?

What'd I tell you about yelping?

It'll blow your cover.

Well, what?

Oh.

Are you still in pain?

It comes in waves.

Here.

Let's not let this gunk on him.

They'll lose him up.

You're his wife. It's okay.

Uh, Mark?

We really have to talk.

Talk? Well, it's obvious you're
suffering from more than just...

You keep holding it all inside.

You know, that's why you get hurt so
much, get cold, get asthma attacks.

Why don't you just shoot me?

No, sweetheart.

That's the thing I like about you. I
know how sensitive you are. But you're

holding something back, Mark. Please
tell me what's wrong.

Mindy? Are you sure that's you?

Of course it's me. Why?

Just your attitude.

I mean, you're being so... Loving?

Yeah. Well, I do love you. I always
have. I want this to work out.

I never knew how much.

Me too.

I think I'm going to cry.

Mindy?

Is there something you want to tell me
about Greg?

Greg?

Who is this Craig character?

I told you, there's nothing between us.
Well, that's not what he said.

What? Said when?

He called tonight when you were out, and
he was looking for you. He

said he wanted you back, and I said, you
know, that you're my wife.

And he said, well, then what was she
doing kissing me the night before your

wedding?

The other shoe drops.

Hi.

Ooh, first fight?

How'd you know?

Well, all couples fight.

On their honeymoon?

Alice and I did.

You and Alice are different.

You've made it through 25 years of
marriage. You're obviously so mixed.

Did you... Did you ever really love him?

I thought I did, but now... I'm a
nightmare.

Everything's all messed up, and I don't
know how to fix it.

Yes, you do.

If you don't really love your husband,
if there's any doubt in your heart about

who you really love, then you can't
stay.

Or over time, that doubt will turn into
resentment. It'll grow and fester.

And then one day you'll be out driving
and you'll be so busy bickering.

that you won't be watching the road and
you'll end up ramming your BMW into a

cow. What?

He doesn't even have a BMW.

Well, he will.

Trust me on that. I know where you are
headed.

And you do, too.

Have you lost your mind?

It's totally against your mission.
You're supposed to save your marriage,

remember? No, our mission was to rectify
the misunderstandings that arose during

our marriage, and I now realize that
that is impossible.

And I do not want her to end up unhappy.

Love... Bye.

Don't you see? I was just...

Just a rebound reaction to losing Greg.

And then, bless her heart, she tried to
live up to it.

And I knew it.

And I let her.

And then I resented her for it.

You love her?

Oh, yes.

That's why I'm going to let her go.

Mindy, I... Mark, we don't have much
time. I know you know about Greg about

night before the wedding. No, no, it
doesn't matter.

I understand.

No, please hear me out.

I went to see him that night. I thought,
if I'm so afraid to see him, maybe that

means something. How can I get married
if I'm feeling this way?

So I met him for coffee.

And you want to hear the real shocker?

He proposed to me.

He had a ring and everything.

Said we should hop in his car right then
and there and elope.

Well, obviously I didn't.

So he lied.

You didn't kiss him.

Well, I did.

Ouch. It was drizzling. A full moon. It
was the perfect romantic moment. You

don't need to go on.

No, no. Yes, yes, I do. This is the part
you really have to hear.

Maybe I'd had a lingering doubt I'd
still feel something, so I kissed him.

But I didn't feel anything.

It was goodbye.

Then why did you keep this a secret from
me?

There was nothing to tell.

I knew I made the right decision. I knew
I loved you.

I knew how much it would hurt you.

But then this made me feel stupid.

It made me feel like... Like what?

Do you love me?

I mean, you know, there hasn't been a
day gone past that I haven't prayed that

could save this marriage.

That I could make you fall in love with
me again.

When I'm out with you on my arm, you
make me feel like ten feet tall.

And that's heavy stuff.

Coming from a late bloomer.

And the class runt.

who was always picked last for the
teens, I could never shake that feeling.

Until the day I walked down that aisle
to marry you.

I knew it.

You love each other.

Now move it.

Well, what? Why? What happened? What's
wrong?

Your husband just set you free.

What?

How did you know?

Thank God.

We're getting an annulment.

What?

Mindy, please. Please don't go.

Please, you're throwing this all away.
We're begging you.

Look, don't worry about me. I'm going to
be fine.

And so will he.

Ow.

You're back?

No, my heart.

Oh. Judge Othniel wouldn't have sent us
back if everything wasn't going to be

all right, would he?

The truth is, sometimes Othniel's idea
of all right is different than yours and

mine.

On the other hand, if there's anything
he's taught me,

It ain't over till the fat lady sings.

It's this Wackenbush here?

What is that?

That's right, I'm Scott Wackenbush.

get an annulment.

You're too late.

They already signed.

Hey, Alice.

What are you guys doing here? I'm swept
away.

Hi. Hello.

What's going to happen to us?

Will we ever see each other again?

Do you love him?

Do you love her?

I do.

Then pray Othniel's right.

True love never dies.

God bless you.

You know, that's the first time you've
said that to me in 25 years.

What's going on?

It's the fat lady.

She's singing.

It's over now.

One rocky road coming right up.

Did he say mom?

Yeah. That's your son.

That's our son.

Takes after his father.

Sorry.

And his mother.

Two rocky roads coming right up.

He's a cute kid.

Almost ten.

You named him Justin.

As in just in time.

Oh.

We're still married.

Yeah. 22 magical years.

You're on your second honeymoon.

Yeah, but they got an annulment.

But then you two started dating again.
And then three years later, You got

married again.

I barely remember any of it. Yeah, well,
you will.

In a few seconds, you'll have no memory
of me or running off the road. It's all

a lot sweeter the second time around.

And Charlie, where's Charlie?

Oh, Charlie.

Did you miss us, sweetie?

Oh, there's my boy.

Cutie plug. Where you been, huh?

Thank you, Mr. Smith.

Yeah, boy, thank you.

For everything.

You're welcome, sir.

If true love never dies, then what's
with all the divorces?

I mean, have you seen all the
statistics?

Maybe the only way to avoid divorce is
to choose your spouse really, really

carefully.

But love in careful.

They don't go together, do they?

It's all about forgiveness, isn't it?

Oh, what happened?

I thought it was a very nice thing that
you did for him.

Absolutely. You know what? Call me
crazy, Justin, but that girl likes you.

On the other hand, what do I know?

If it was only up to you to change to a
world of wonder

from a world of pain, I would let the

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