All language subtitles for Silver Spoons s05e20 Thoroughly Modern Mildred

Here we are, face to face, like the fuzz
of a pool.

Hoping to find two of a kind.

Making it go, making it grow.

Together, we're going to find our way.

Together, taking the time each day.

To learn all about those things you just
can't find.

The two silver spoons together.

You and together.

Yeah, I like the message, too. Rock to
your butt.

Sounds great on your stereo.

Oh, thanks.

But if you think it sounds good over
there, you should listen to it over

Uh -oh.

Yeah, you see, my dad had those speakers
strategically placed so that the

optimum stereo separation converges
right here on the couch.

The middle of the couch.

That is better.

Yes, it is.

You know, Eileen, the first time we met
in chemistry, I felt there was a certain

something between us.

You know, a kind of chemistry.

And then when we started sharing a
Bunsen burner, I felt... How should I

this?

A sort of fire between us.

What? My foot's asleep.

Oh, here. Let me help you.

Oh, that feels good.

Oh, yeah?

Is anything else asleep?

Never mind.

So, what were you saying?

Who cares?

didn't expect you home so soon.

Obviously.

Um, this is Eileen. She was helping me
with my, um, my, um, chemistry.

Well, thanks a lot, Eileen. I couldn't
have done it without you.

Yeah, I'll see you later. Okay.

It was nice meeting you, Mr. and Mrs.
Stratton.

Oh.

Nice meeting you.

I've got to go get ready for Grandma.

She's not due for another hour.

Well, I'm a slow dresser.

Rick.

You know, I don't think it was a real
good idea to bring a girl back here when

we weren't home. Oh, come on, Dad. She
wasn't up in my room or anything.

I didn't violate that rule.

You violated the spirit of that rule.

Yeah, but, Dad, we were just kissing.

With your shoes off?

Hey, Kate, didn't you tell me never to
put my shoes on the furniture?

I was obeying that rule.

Well, here's a new rule.

No girls in the house when we're not
home.

Oh, Dad, come on. That's not fair.

I'm not a kid anymore. I'm almost 17
years old.

That's why there's a new rule.

What's that?

It's a candy dish.

Grandma Mildred gave it to us for our
anniversary last year. Oh, that's right.

First year anniversary's paper, second
year's wood, third year must be tacky.

Oh, be nice.

As soon as Grandma leaves, I'll put it
back in the closet. Good.

Next to the things your father gave
them.

Oh, for now.

Hey, I got it.

There you are.

Thank you.

We're so glad to see you. How was your
flight?

Well, it was quite bumpy.

Until we got in the air, and then it was
fine.

Why don't we go on in and relax, huh?

Oh, great. But first I want you all to
meet Chester.

Where's Chester?

Chester!

There's Chester.

Gosh, come on in, Chester. I'm awfully
sorry.

That's okay.

Well, I'm Edward.

How do you do? How are you? Glad to know
you.

And this is my granddaughter, Kate.

How do you do? Hi, nice to meet you.

And this is Rick.

Hi, Rick. Hi, how are you? Say, go out
and have a good time.

Hey, thanks.

I'll go out and have a good time.

Well, if we're all here, why don't we go
sit down and relax?

So, Grandma, is Chester the big surprise
you wrote us about? Yes, he is.

He's my main squeeze.

So, how did you two kids meet?

Well, you heard of the love boat?

Oh, a cruise.

How romantic.

No, we were watching the show.

At the Golden Hills Country Club. Yes,
and right in the most exciting part.

Chester whispered in my ear, let's blow
this joint.

You smooth -talking devil.

So I took her out for a pepperoni pizza.

And you've been sharing heartburn ever
since.

Yes.

Oh, and then when I told Chester I was
going to come to New York for a few

he said he just couldn't bear to be
without me.

And she bought it.

I haven't been to New York in years, and
I'm dying to show Mildred some of my

old haunts. Don't say dying.

I'll tell you what. We'll paint the big
apple red, and it's on me.

Well, fine. We'll get started first
thing in the morning.

Hell no. Let's hit the road.

Don't you want to rest?

Oh, we can rest later.

She's right.

It's time to party.

They say the neon lights are bright on
broad.

Aren't you coming with us, Rick?

Yeah, no thanks, Dad. I've seen the
lights on Broadway.

Besides, I have a date with Eileen.

But, Dad, not here. We're meeting at
burgers. There's going to be tons of

there. It's Friday night.

Come on, let's go.

Keep your shirt on.

And you keep your shoes on.

Jack, where have you guys been? It's
after midnight.

Oh, is that all?

Well, those poops said it was late.

Are we home yet?

I don't understand it. I thought you
young people liked to dance.

Not slam dancing.

I wasn't slam dancing. That was my trick
knee.

Oh, Rick.

How was your date tonight?

Fantastic.

Yeah, but not that fantastic.

Well, after one, I'm going to hit the
sack.

Well, I think we should get some rest,
too.

Oh, Rick, why don't you take Grandma's
bag out to her room?

Oh, sure, Kate.

Where should I put Chester's bag?

You can put it in my room.

Don't say a word until I get back.

Well, your grandma's full of surprises.

Edward, what are we going to do?

Honey, there's nothing you can do.

Edward, that's my grandmother.

She bakes apple pie.

She knits.

She writes thank you notes.

Maybe Chester should write her one.

Come on, honey, I don't think there's
anything to get that upset about.

Yeah, but Edward, she raised me.

She gave me my values, and now she's
spending the night with someone she's

even married to. Well, honey, they had a
very busy night. They'll probably just

sleep.

Well, I put the lovebirds in their room,
and they're taking their shoes off.

So, who's going to enforce the hanky
-panky rule?

This is not funny.

Well, surely they're not going to be
allowed to spend the night in the same

bedroom. I mean, when I can't even bring
a girl into this house.

This is different.

Oh, so I see. There's a double standard
here.

Rick, I know that this may seem like
there's a double standard to you.

Yes? That's because there is.

Oh, okay, as long as there's a good
reason.

Good night, Rick.

Who would have thought my great -grandma
would turn out to be a swinger?

Good night, Rick.

They say the neon lights are bright on
Broadway.

Wonderful.

He thinks his great -grandmother is hot
to trot.

Yeah.

Honey, come on. I think it's nice that
she found a little companionship.

But Grandpa knew about this. He'd turn
over in his grave.

I thought he was cremated.

Have to turn over in his jar.

This isn't funny.

I know.

I mean, she's led a very protected life.

Well, now she's got Chester to protect
her.

Well, what do we know about this man,
huh?

We know he's a hell of a slam dancer.

He could be filling her head with all
kinds of lies.

You know, he could be a love him and
leave him kind of a guy.

Chester? I've seen this type before, you
know, shifty eyes, tight -lipped smile.

Honey, he's trying to keep his teeth in.

Edward, I'm worried about her. I mean,
this goes against everything she ever

stood for.

I think it's time for a little talk with
Chester. I mean, we need to know his

intentions. Well, honey, if you feel
that strongly about it, you go right

and have a talk with him.

Well, actually, I'd feel better if you
had a talk with him.

Me? Well, you know, man to man.

Honey, you're much better at man to man
talks than me.

Well, I'm serious, Edward.

Please?

Hmm?

Do it for me?

Please? Pretty good at woman -to -man
talk, too.

Oh. Hey,

morning, Dad.

Hey, boy.

So, have the lovebirds come down yet?

No. No? After all, they had a pretty
busy night.

I bet.

I meant all the dancing.

Yeah, sure.

Good morning, good morning.

Oh, Sixer, well, we thought you were
still in bed.

At 8 o 'clock in the morning, the whole
day would be gone.

No, I was just taking a nice walk around
the grounds.

Ah.

Uh, Rick, why don't you see how Kate's
doing with breakfast, huh?

What for? She does fine.

Why don't you see if she needs some
help?

Dad, she'll only kick me out of there.

Rick? Yeah? Get out of here.

I'm leaving, I'm leaving.

Chester, please, sit down. Thank you.

You know, Chester, Kate's kind of
worried about her grandmother.

What's she worried about?

Well, what kind of plans do you and
Mildred have?

Well, we plan on an early lunch, and
then tonight maybe we'll see a movie.

No, I mean long range.

Listen, at our age, that is long range.

Seriously, now, do you have plans to
settle down, tie the knot, get

hitched?

You mean are we going to get married?

You could put it that way.

I'd love to, but you won't have me.

What do you mean she won't have you?
I've asked her to marry me plenty of

She says no. I even got down on my knees
and begged.

Took me half an hour to get up.

Oh, you're exaggerating, Rick.

I'm sure your father didn't chase you
out of there.

Uh, Rick, go get the paper.

Dad, you already got the paper.

Then wait for tomorrow's edition.

Dad, if you want to talk to Kate, just
say so.

Rick. Dad, it would take me 20 seconds
to get the paper. I'd be back here.

give me something else. Rick, get out of
here.

I'm gone. I'm gone.

Edward, did you have your man -to -man
talk? Well, I spoke with Chester, if

that's what you mean. Yeah, and?

And your grandmother's a party animal.

What? Honey, Chester's asked her several
times to marry him, and she keeps

saying no.

Well, that doesn't make any sense. That
doesn't sound like my grandmother.

Doesn't sound like any grandmother.

Bunny slam.

Body slam.

That's it.

Crush him.

I didn't know you liked wrestling.

Well, I didn't until Chester turned me
on to it.

That's nice. Sounds like he's opening
new horizons for you.

Oh, yeah. I'll say.

And it's also nice to see you have
companionship. Well, thank you, dear.

sweet. Well, we all need companionship.

Oh, you are so right.

You know, for years it's a house full of
relatives, children, and grandchildren,

and all of a sudden they're all grown up
and they leave.

Yeah,

and then you and Grandpa were all alone.

Yes.

And then Grandpa died.

Yeah, he went so fast.

He did everything fast.

But your grandpa and I shared some
wonderful times together.

And then when he was gone, there was
nothing.

Just nothing for me.

Until Chester came along.

Well, you know, we like Chester a lot. A
whole lot.

Well, what's not to like?

That man is a hunk.

Well, I just brought it up in case you
were worried or wanted to know. We love

Chester. Me too.

You do?

Oh, so you love him, and I get the
feeling he might, well, have strong

for you, too.

Could be.

Oh, do I hear bells?

Yes, that's the end of the match.

No, Grandma, I was talking about wedding
bells.

Oh, so that's what this is all about, is
it?

I was wondering when you'd bring that
up.

Well, I certainly hope you don't think I
was prying.

Well, what would you call it?

Well, I, uh, prying.

Look, Kate, what Chester and I do is our
own concern and nobody else's.

So I'll thank you to mind your own
business.

Hey, Grandma, I thought you were
watching wrestling.

I was.

What's wrong? Is Killer Kelly losing?

No, it's just that I'm getting sick and
tired of people telling me what to do.

Yeah, tell me about it.

Like she doesn't think I know what I'm
doing, like I'm a child or something.

I know the feeling.

Who are we talking about?

Kate. Telling me I ought to marry
Chester.

Not that I don't like Chester or
anything.

I like him a lot.

It's just that marriage is something you
don't rush into.

That's what I keep telling Eileen.

You know, it's been three years since my
Henry died.

And I'm still not over it.

Sometimes it seems like Henry's still
with me.

Did Henry ever meet Chester?

No, I don't believe he ever did.

Why do you ask?

No reason.

I'll bet you you would have liked him.

Yes, I think you're right.

Henry would have liked Chester.

Well, I guess we got everything.

Edward, Mildred and I sure did have a
good time.

I wouldn't mention that to Kate.

I want to thank you for your
hospitality.

You get out to Ohio. I want to return
the favor.

George Springfield's a little tame
compared to the Big Apple.

Oh, I'll bet he has a lot to offer.

Not really.

But whenever we get in the mood to have
a real wild time in the big city, we

just hop in the car and tool on up to
Akron.

Oh, Grandma.

Is it... That time already?

Oh, I'm afraid so, dear. But before I
go... No, I've got to tell you

Yesterday, I was way, way, way out of
line.

Well, maybe we both were. But, honey...
Please, let me finish.

What you do with your life is your
business and no one else's.

Kate... I never should have opened my
mouth to begin with.

We're getting married. And not only
that... You're getting married!

As soon as we get back home.

Oh!

Wonderful. Oh, I am so happy for you.
Thank you.

Well, what happened? What changed your
mind?

Something I said, huh?

No.

Actually, it was something Rick said.

But you got me started.

I realized that I wasn't standing in the
way as much as your grandfather was.

Oh? Well, I just couldn't see Chester
and me living in the same house with all

those memories.

Oh, so what happened?

We're buying a condo. Oh, all right.
Come on, sweet, thanks. We'll miss our

plane. Okay, honey lamb.

Kate, guess what Chester just told me?
Yeah, Grandma and Chester are getting

married.

Lucky guess.

What's this about getting married?

Rick, you're... Let me tell him.

Chester and I are getting married.

You don't have to, do you?

Great, Grandma.

Yes, it is.

But just in case you learned the wrong
lesson from all of this, if I ever hear

of you living with a girl and not being
married, you'd better be 68 years old or

I'll come back here and take you over my
knee.