Original subtitles

Ho, ho, and ho.

Hi, hi, and hi.

All right, young lovers of learning and short pants.

I do love short pants.

Yeah, guess what I love. What?

Laughing perky redheads.

Now, Jade, don't be a... Christmas grunch.

Grunch. That's my word.

Oh, damn. Yeah, it is. It's absolutely the end of the world.

I don't care. I'm just going to give up music. Just forget it. Forget

everything.

Ho, ho, ho.

And jingle bells.

Oh,

you did it.

I bet that jingled his bells.

I'm sorry, but all of y 'all can just keep the Christmas spirit to yourselves.

Andre, you got a beef with Christmas?

I love Christmas beef. Every year my brother steals a chuck roast and then

it with... Hey, hey.

She woke me up.

Oh, sorry, Beck.

Certainly wouldn't want to keep you awake during my class.

Thanks, you're the best.

Now, before I get my teacher on... Andre, why the

sour puss?

Yeah. Why the sour puss?

I don't really want to talk about it.

Andre wrote a Christmas song for his creative music class.

And it was a really great song.

But his teacher gave him... Don't say it out loud!

Okay. A D!

I said it out loud!

A D?

I've always gotten A's in music. How does a person go from an A to a D?

Happened to me in eighth grade.

Well,

I'm sorry, Andre. Now, yo! Whoa, whoa, wow, wow.

Why Becky so sleepy?

There's a stupid cricket in my RV, so I can't sleep because it chirps all night

long. So just call one of those bug murderers. Uh, they're called

Yeah, why sugarcoat it?

Hey, psycho. Yes, what is it, boy?

I have your Hollywood art.

Secret Santa assignment.

Oh, who am I buying a gift for this year?

Courtney Van Cleef?

Oh, no, that kid's a freaky little weirdo.

She's my sister.

I know.

I don't know why your parents didn't stop with you.

Could I please switch Secret Santa assignments with someone?

Come on, please.

Tori? Sorry, I didn't sign up for the Secret Santa thing.

Yeah, none of us did.

Why not?

Because it's stupid.

Why should we buy gifts for random people we don't care about?

What's the point?

All right.

You kids need a big fat dose of Christmas spirit rammed into your

hearts.

So there's such as your teacher. I require you to participate in Secret

I text you all your Secret Santa assignments, and I expect you all to

good, very creative gifts.

And what if we don't?

Whoever gives the worst gift will have to join me on Christmas Eve for

Christmas yodeling.

What's Christmas yodeling? Yodeling!

And you don't know where you are now.

Or what it will come to if only somebody could hear.

When you figure out how.

You're lost in the moment. You disappear.

You don't have to be afraid to put your dream in action.

You're never gonna fade. You'll be the main attraction.

Not a fantasy.

Just remember me.

When it turns out right.

Cause you know.

Okay,

Mr. Santa Claus, let's see what you got.

I do not need your negativity.

Oh, yay!

Yay what?

Yay me?

No, I just got a text from Psychwits. I get to be Secret Santa.

Be that.

Why do I have to... You said he's not going to change it, so just deal with

Why don't you just deal with it? Why don't you just deal with it?

His heart is vibrating. How much coffee have you drunk? A lot, like a lot. I

don't know, like maybe seven cups, a lot. Is there a problem?

He's drinking coffee to stay awake at school because of the stupid cricket

that's keeping him up every night.

A lot of coffee.

Look, I don't want to be Tori's secret Santa.

Too bad.

I can't help it.

Hey, Trina, Trina. What?

You want to see what I got Andre for his Secret Santa gift?

No.

Look.

It's a little ceramic guitar.

I made it at Color Me Pot.

I thought Psychwood said that your Secret Santa gifts have to be really

and creative.

He did.

Well, that's ugly and useless.

to pretend to play it, like, no, no, no, sorry, give me this Christmas present,

and it's a Johnny guitar.

Why are you walking away?

Because I'm embarrassed for you.

That was mean.

Hey, Andre, Christmas bead?

Yeah, sure.

Wait, who made it? My brother.

Mm -mm, nope, no thank you.

Because last month I ate a Thanksgiving sausage and I'm still a mess.

Ho, ho to the ho.

What's up?

Hello.

So, Mr.

Music Man, close your eyes and get ready for...

A legit Secret Santa gift.

Since when are you and Robbie friends?

Ugh, we're not.

I just, um, I'm making him do stuff for me.

And why would he agree to that?

Because I'm pretty.

But... It's open!

Hey, girls!

Hey, Robbie.

How are the Vegas sisters doing on this fine December evening?

There's 20 boxes of ornaments in the garage. Go get them.

You said we'd have pizza first. Yeah, changed my mind. Ornaments. Get them.

I had some cat's Christmas beef, and I'm kind of a mess.

You know, she's just using you.

I know.

But when we're done, she might hug me, so I'm okay with it.

That's so sad.

Yeah.

I think something just moved in your bushes outside.

Arm right in there.

Okay.

It's crushing my arm!

What? It is?

No, just kidding.

It feels nice.

You're dealing with a rock.

Anthony! Anthony!

Come on, please!

Andre, the reason that you got a D...

is that your Christmas song deserved a D.

Okay.

All right.

You're the teacher, and I respect your decision.

Thank you.

What is the matter with you?

I'm sorry.

Anthony, wait.

I let my emotions get the best of me. Anthony, I'm going to work on this.

Anthony, Anthony.

Mr. Robbie Shapiro.

Hey, Beck.

Let's talk Secret Santa.

You're my secret Santa?

Merry Christmas, Rob.

You bought me a girl?

No, no.

You know how you always talk about that bully, the one who used to beat you up

when you were seven?

Yeah, Christy Vicarious.

And I hated that beefy little witch and her mean face.

And you always say you'd kill for just one chance to tell her off.

Yeah?

Robbie?

Christy Picard.

You found her?

You're Christy?

So, you want to tell me off?

Well, I did.

But now you're hot.

Maybe you kids should go to Jet Brew and talk things over. Oh, I'm not paying

three dollars for a cup of coffee.

This will buy coffee and scones.

Scones. Maybe in Canada.

Merry Christmas, Rob.

Ew. Your hand is sweaty.

I know.

Here.

This is the most gigantic cup of coffee they sell.

It's not enough.

Look, that cricket's been keeping you awake for over a month now. Hi!

Secret sanitizer!

You mine or his?

Yours. For you.

Give it.

Oh, my God, Kat, you did not.

Scissors. They're special scissors.

Okay.

They're from a real movie.

I cannot believe you got me these.

What movie were they used in?

Scissoring.

Wait, that one about the girl who comes back from the dead and uses a pair of

scissors on her two best friends?

Yep. Starting with the pretty girl.

Oh.

Um...

Anyway, you guys, I'm Andre Secret Santa, and I have, like, no clue what to

him. Just get him a present.

My God.

Okay, help me, please. I don't want to give him the worst present and then have

to go Christmas yodeling with psychoids.

Two words.

I bet they won't be helpful.

Your problem.

I was right.

operations go on that thing soon first we have to flock it you you have to what

it flock it i i don't understand this is a flocking machine you use it to

spray fake snow all over the tree and that's called flocking sure is

You. Wait!

Do you have your new scissors with you?

No.

Don't be shy.

Those are my old scissors.

Okay, so what do you want?

Merry Christmas.

You're my secret Santa?

Ho, ho.

Ho.

So, what's my gift? An idea for a present to give to Andre.

You have an idea? A perfect one.

Awesome. Tell me.

You just press the red button right on top.

Sorry.

Please get me a flock rag.

Hey, man.

Hey, Beck. Yeah, hey. Hi.

What?

Bam! Oh.

So you're my secret Santa. True cheers. Open it up.

Hey.

You bought me a cricket?

Nope. I caught you a cricket.

That's the one that's been living in your trailer keeping you up every night.

Shut up. How did you catch him? Well, your mom let me into your place after

left this morning, and I used some peanut butter to lure him into that box.

How did you know the cricket liked peanut butter?

Everybody likes peanut butter.

Is that a cricket?

Uh -huh.

Can I have it?

Sure.

Courtney, Merry Christmas from your secret Santa.

What'd you get?

A cricket.

That's hot.

Here comes Robbie with Andre's teacher.

Hurry, go, go.

Check.

Hey, Anthony.

Hey.

Okay, everyone, you guys know Anthony, one of Hollywood Arts' awesome music

teachers? Here he is, to my right.

Well,

earlier this week, he gave Andre Harris a D on his Christmas song.

Not everybody knows.

So, we thought that you guys should hear Andre's Christmas song and see what you

think.

We need suspended Christmas time.

Christmas time.

Maybe I was wrong about your song.

Way wrong.

So, now you're going to change Andre's grade, too.

Well... Perhaps... an A?

An A.

And

when

the gift gets... was over, Psychowitz realized that all the children gave each

other wonderfully creative Christmas presents and that his gift, a used

to an awkward young girl, was truly the worst Christmas present of all. And so,

on that Christmas Eve, he yodeled with crazy strangers.

As long as you stayed. So tell me that you love me.

Yeah. And tell me that I take your breath away.

And maybe if you take one more.

Then I would know for sure. There's nothing left to say.

Tell me.