All language subtitles for The.Naked.Gun.2025.HDTS.x264.RGB

Thank you.

No one moves until you work through the
mirror.

What do you want, little one?

Who are you?

Frank Drebin.

Police squad.

The new version.

My name is Sergeant Frank Drebin,
Detective Lieutenant of the Squad,

Division of the LAPD.

The day after the bank robbery started
like any other, I woke up in my empty

apartment. They added a picture of my
deceased cop wife and choked back cop

tears. A perfect morning?

Sure. But I had no idea what this city
had in store for me.

Thanks, everyone.

What is this?

Don't cheer for him. You two, my office
now.

Thanks to you, I just spent two hours
getting chewed out by the mayor.

Apparently, some of the bank robbers you
put in the ICU, they're lawyering up to

sue the city. That's ridiculous.

They're criminals.

It's the law.

Since when do cops have to follow the
law?

Since forever.

Oh, yeah? And who's going to arrest me?
Other cops?

Yes. Is he serious? Is he serious?

No, he's not. Let me be crystal clear.

They are threatening to shut down the
police squad because of you.

Honestly, you're lucky you still work
here after last year's McDonald's

incident. They wouldn't sell me freedom
fries.

You arrested the entire staff.

I wasn't thinking clearly.

I was furious about the Janet Jackson
Super Bowl.

That was 20 years ago.

Not to me. We understand you.

You're right. Good.

Because I'm kicking you off the bank,
John.

What? I'm putting you on collision.

There's a crash up in Malibu.

Yes, Kim. Thank you. And make sure your
body cams are actually turned on.

Got it.

Camera will be on.

Drebin, it's a new day at police squad.

I guess you really can't fight City
Hall, huh? No.

It's a building.

Now, there's a real man.

They just don't make him like your pops
anymore.

I'm glad he's not around to see what
police squad has come to.

Mind if I take him in there, Dad?

Of course.

Hi, Danny. It's me, Frank Jr.

I want to be just like you, but at the
same time, be completely different and

original.

So, if you're proud of me, give me a
sign.

Maybe make me see an owl or something.

Hey, Dad.

It's me, Ed.

Boy, do I miss you.

after the Malibu car crash around 2 p
.m. Nothing unusual.

Don't you see?

Usual is unusual.

Usually.

So how was your day last night, Frank?

Bad. I cut up a little bit.

You canceled?

No. I didn't want to upset her, so I had
Officer Bond cover. I was stabbed to

death. You're a real romantic, Frank.
But everyone needs someone.

Even a widower like you. I'm just not
ready to open myself to love again.

Have them wait to clear the wreck so you
can get eyes on it.

Crash happened around 4 a .m.

Also, no skid marks on the road.

He didn't hit the brakes before going
over.

Drunk? A little. Just enough to wake me
up.

Fancy car.

That's one of those new Eden Tech
electric ones.

Electric, huh?

I remember when the only thing that were
electric were eels and chairs.

And Catherine Zeta -Jones in Chicago.

Empty pill bottles.

Who was he?

Simon Davenport, 53 years old, no wife,
no kids.

He's got a sister out in Hancock Park,
but we don't really know anything about

her other than her name.

That's Davenport.

The fourth, 5 '6", 130 pounds.

Spitfire of a personality, self
-proclaimed chocoholic. Likes outdoorsy

but is just as happy curling up with a
good book.

All right, I've seen enough.

The market is suicide.

Go ahead.

What's up, Blanche?

I know you're off the bank job, sir, but
I could really use your advice.

Go for it. Look, it's a strange thing.

All the thieves have never met each
other, and none of them knew who they

working for.

Brilliant. If they don't know anything,
they can't squeal.

Whoever orchestrated this is very smart.

And get this. The robbers were told that
they could keep the cash.

Who organizes a bank robbery and doesn't
keep the cash?

They must have been after something
else.

Why don't you bring in one of the perps?
See if we can get them talking.

Got it. Thank you.

There's no Frank you got a business
total to wait outside, but she just

in you want me to get rid of her

Okay,

I'll deal with it

Oh

Over here lieutenant

after my wife died.

But this woman was put together in all
the right ways.

Face, head, throat, knees and toes.

Knees and toes.

And a bottom that would make any poet
beg for the brown.

She ought to give you what you need.

Won't I help you?

You're wrong about Simon Davenport.

He wouldn't commit suicide.

Simon Davenport?

The stiff from the Malibu crash?

That stiff was my breaker.

Oh, I mean, he wasn't that stiff,
really. Not yet.

Or floppy and bloated.

No, I mean, I'm so sorry for your loss.

Please, take a chair.

No, thank you.

I have plenty of chairs at home.

Now, Mrs... Davenport.

Miss.

Well, he called me last night. He said
he was in some kind of trouble. So he

made plans to meet this morning. Does
that sound like someone is planning to

kill themselves?

No, it certainly does not.

Why would someone do that to you?

Trust me, there's always a reason to
kill someone.

Does he have an obnoxious laugh?

No.

Forgive me, I'm just not myself.

That's okay.

I'm not you either.

What did your brother do for work?

Computers.

He was a programmer for Richard Caine.

A genius is going to save the world with
his electric cars.

Well, he's the first person you should
talk to. I need to check Simon's driving

records and see if they match. Whoa,
whoa, whoa. Slow down there.

Excuse me?

Let's just leave the police work to me,
okay?

Oh, I see.

Same old story with guys like you.

Guys like me?

Stubborn old men who think they know
what's best.

I understand you're upset, but this is
what I do.

If someone did off your brother, I'll
find him.

Oh, I appreciate that, Detective.

But Simon was all I had.

So forgive me if I don't just sit around
and hope you do your job.

That's exactly what I expect you to do.

When I have something, I'll contact you.

I'm doing a series of book readings this
week.

You can find me there.

Book readings?

Yes, I write true crime novels based on
fictional stories that I make up.

Yes. Well, you may write about it, but
I'd live it.

Now, if you'll excuse me, we're having a
birthday party, and I'm the best singer

in the office.

One second, bud. I will take that chair.

I couldn't remember that. The last time
someone had talked to me like that, it

was the kind of dressing gown you
usually have to pay for in the basement

laundromat. She had the kind of hips you
wanted to put a hula hoop on and spin.

The kind of... Tell us, do you mind?

I wasn't convinced Simon

Davenport had been murdered, but the
case was starting to give me an itch.

When I start to scratch, I don't stop
till I break skin and the doctor makes

wear mittens.

Richard Kane had made his first fortune
in microprocessors.

Then he used it to build a vast online
retail marketplace and green technology

empire.

Then, suddenly, the bear charges towards
me. I ready my knife, and he barrels

right past me to a honey hive above the
campsite.

It had been there all along, and I
hadn't seen it.

Ah, you've arrived.

Lieutenant Sheldon.

Me too.

Richard. Richard Kane.

Please, welcome me.

So, what can you tell me about Mr.
Davenport?

Simon was a brilliant engineer.

One of our best.

I had no idea he was so terribly
depressed.

So, Simon.

Direct assignment.

Possible suicide.

Did you expect to be found?

No. A chicken probably couldn't do this.
But I'm not ruling anything out. I see.

Was this one of the projects Simon was
working on?

No. What you see here is a red light
therapy machine, proven to increase

testosterone. Did you know that men's
sperm count is at a stark low across the

board? Fascinating.

I've never put my sperm across the
board.

I have an old Don Julie t -shirt for
that.

You know, I hope you don't think it's
awkward in my saying this, but I'm

actually a big fan of yours.

Is that so?

Yes. I read about your work at the bank
robbery.

Guys like you are a dying breed.

Guys like me? Yes. Men of action.

Don't ask permission to fix what they
know is broken.

I'm surprised to hear you say that.

Coming from someone who's so into these
gadgets.

Oh, you don't enjoy the marvels of the
modern age?

No offense, but the world was better
before.

I agree.

I don't tell anyone.

A cigar?

Looks good to me.

Would you like one?

Smoking indoor?

Can't write me a ticket?

That matchbook.

I've seen it before.

The Bengal.

The summer club I own.

For some, the city's elite.

It's the kind of place where men can be
themselves, have a few drinks, and, uh,

like the Black Eyed Peas once said, get
retarded in here.

You're gonna say that quote?

In my club? Yeah.

Well, I love the Black Eyed Peas. Who
doesn't? I know a few people. They're

fools. I know.

Well, um, Apple, you are taboo. Don't
forget Fergie. I would never forget

Fergie. The doctor.

Well, if you need anything, please don't
hesitate to call.

Thank you. I'll be in touch.

It's that way. Of course.

Why don't we get with the drubbing that
we get for tomorrow?

The Eden Vox One.

Three -squad, first -ever, fully
-automated, self -driving electric

gift we just received from Richard Kane.

You must have made some kind of
impression last night, Frank.

Yeah, we seem so.

Coffee? Yes, thank you.

Don't be shy, fellas. Come check it out.

Smooth.

All electric, 0 to 50 in 3 .1 seconds.

I guess that's good.

Watch this.

Car. Open the door.

I did it. Now you talk.

Paul, please, close the door.

Okay,

how about this? Paul, you forward, stay
seated.

half a dozen witnesses that place you on
the scene. We know you were at the

bank. I'm telling you, I wasn't there.

Thanks, partner.

This is quite the rat seat you've got
here.

Says you served 20 years for man's
laughter.

Must have been quite the joke. You mean
manslaughter?

So what was the point of the robbery?
What did he want?

I wasn't there.

You're so smart.

Well, I think my body cam might tell a
different story.

Ed?

Technology really is something.

Police squad is all about transparency
these days.

Dispatch, this is driven.

Breakfast of champions.

And a little black coffee.

Okay. We can fast forward a bit.

License and registration, please.

This is a mine.

Excuse me.

Oh, boy.

Listen, you seem like a decent fella.
I'm going to let you off with the

Have a great day. Bye.

It's much later in the day. Fast forward
a while.

You'll see. Just wait.

Another suit.

Orange.

Sorry.

Police officer.

They are the line, ma 'am.

You're a disgusting,

stupid idiot.

Right.

Don't you dare.

Don't do it.

Don't eat it.

Oh, God.

I had five more that day.

Feel better, Frank?

You better believe it.

Yes. That's you inside the bank.

We missed it.

Okay, fine.

Whoever we was working for, they was
crazy.

I mean, they just wanted us to get some
safe deposit box.

Safe deposit box.

There.

Box 595.

And check the list.

Yep.

You're not going to believe this one,
Frank.

Simon Davenport.

When you joined me to launch Eden Tech,
it was with one goal.

To save the world.

Together we've created technologies to
rival the gods.

Has the world gotten any better?

No.

It's only gotten worse.

Now, when the founding fathers created
this country, they sat in a room like

this, filled with men like us, and
birthed an empire.

The USA.

Yes, that's right.

But as years went by... Other people
want to get into that room.

Fish people.

What? Fish people.

Gills on their necks.

I don't know. Like mermen and merwomen.

Mermaids, right.

No, stop.

Not fish people.

Ungrateful people.

People that did not earn their seat at
the table.

People not built like the men in this
room.

Crab hands.

They had crab hands instead of fingers.
Stop. I know what I mean.

So just let me do the talking. This is a
crab hand.

I've met him. Put the phone away.

Now, it's time for us to admit that the
path we're on is not working.

The system is broken.

What are we going to do when the system
is malfunctioning?

You won't plug it.

And then, you plug it in again.

I call it the primordial law of
toughness device.

Let me show you what it's capable of.

Last year, we set up cameras at the
local community center, decided to run a

little experiment.

The question, what would happen to
modern humans if we reverted their sight

an original state of nature?

When activated, the device sets an audio
frequency that reduces the brain to its

animalistic core.

The frequency was limited, but next
time, it was bred to every smart device.

until the entire world is infected.

As for us, upon that nation, we will
decapitate one of my super bumpers

the world, where there will be food,
water, and the best live entertainment

world has to offer.

What's up, evil billionaires? I am so
excited to be doing live shows for as

as it takes in the Doomsday Giggles
Bunker Room, located in Block 4 of the

Arizona District.

See you there!

I'm in paradise.

And when the embers have died down, Any
survivors left will earn their place

alongside us, and we will return to a
world that has been a blank place upon

which we can rebuild as the founding
fathers of a new Eden.

Gentlemen, ladies, this new Eve I give
you.

Project Inferno!

It turned out that Kane's nightclub was
only half a mile from where Simon

Davenport crashed.

And that got me thinking. Maybe he had
been there the night he died.

So I hopped into my new electric cruiser
and told it to head to Malibu.

Please take the wheel.

Warning. Please take the wheel.

Warning. Please take the wheel.

Warning. Please take the wheel. Warning.

Please take the wheel.

Warning.

Please take the wheel.

What can I get you?

I was wondering if you could help me.

I'm looking for a friend who left in
here before.

No. I haven't seen him.

You hardly looked at him. I saw enough.

You don't remember me, do you?

Should I? My brother. You shot him. In
the name of justice.

There could literally be thousands of
people. You shot him in the back as he

away. Hundreds.

Unarmed. At least 50. He was white.

So you're Tony Roiland's brother.

That's right.

How is old Tony?

Are you serious?

Dad?

Right.

So your friend. Maybe I have seen him.
Maybe I haven't.

I can't remember.

You can't remember, huh?

Nah. Well, maybe this will jog your
memory.

Good.

That's better.

Remember now? Yeah, I remember. He said
in a corner booth he had a drink.

That's all I know.

Where did they keep surveillance
footage?

In the back.

Even I'm not allowed in there.

And there she was again.

I had to admit, she was beautiful.

She had a body that carried her head
around.

And a butt does seem to say, hello, I'm
a talking butt.

Elegant? Yeah, I'd say so.

But like a teenager with three
babysitting jobs, I didn't need another

babysitting job.

Hello, Lieutenant.

What the hell are you doing here?

Don't take me anywhere.

Told you I wasn't going to sit around
and wait.

Listen, this isn't one of your stories.

Average decision women don't suddenly
fall for.

Oh, my fuck.

I think it's a fantasy.

A woman puts on a wig and stands like
this and suddenly she's an assassin.

But did you enjoy it?

It had some good part.

Ah! Look at the threbbin'. I mean, I'm
your famous sister.

Good. I've kept it that way.

You're a wonderful surprise.

Fine, thank you.

Beautiful place you've got here.

Can't come out with dead animals at all.

Thank you.

Uh, can I get the book?

It's just water.

And who is this stunning creature?

I don't believe in that.

Why, Mom?

I don't think they've missed.

Um,

they're in Rome, so Pat Bozo's coming to
get him.

What an interesting name.

Yeah.

Thank you. So, okay. What makes you
here?

I was hoping you could let me take a
look at your security footage.

Oh, may I go on? Go right ahead.

Unfortunately, I can't show you the
security footage.

Our members trust that we will provide
them with the highest level of privacy.

I hope you understand.

I'm starting to.

Well, thank you so much for the drink.
It's getting late. We really must be

going. So soon?

I hope you don't leave two of us
spaghetti.

Yes, she's leaving too.

That's really bad. It's covered in dog.

Oh, spaghetti.

Please stay for a drink.

You don't mind.

Do you, Trevor?

Be my guest.

Wonderful. I'll get it to you.

You get the footage. I'll keep them
occupied.

Absolutely not.

this place is amazing oh thank you
spaghetti i mean i think really i prefer

english you're much too sophisticated
for the likes of frank dredd oh i'm not

with jeffy oh well that's wonderful

Oh, let's not talk about work. Let's
talk about play.

Do you like jazz?

I like it. I love it. I love it.

Sir?

This one's for my electric new

friend, Richard Lane.

Wow.

I know we've been fighting with a lot of
old jazz music.

A scat -lagging ball from whom no one
really knows if it's the sound of their

body.

We need his muscles lined. Rub it on
and...

The driver might be more of a problem
than we thought.

I want you to keep an eye on him.

Make sure he doesn't cause any more
distraction.

Davis, this better be good.

He did what?

He just ratted the infant.

Mom, I'm so sorry, but you have to
listen.

You wake up my husband, I swear to God.

Mary, what the hell are you thinking?

Richard Dean is a very powerful man, and
he moves a lot of hefty donations to

the city, including the new car you're
driving.

Richard Dean is dirty.

He's involved in a Simon Davenport
murder. By the way, that means you're

through.

Are you tired?

I'm tired,

I'm hungry.

You're not worried about me, everyone?

My condolences.

How did it pass?

Great. Fifty yards easy.

Like a camel.

And then she died.

So one of the more she could have been,
though.

She was the sweetest woman I've ever
known.

One of the more I've ever known.

We would have been happy with Nathan,
really.

And that was the most.

Quite a view you have.

You know, I'm drawn to the hills ever
since I moved here for college.

Do you see a light?

I see it every day.

I live here.

I'm afraid I don't want the offer.

However... All that turkey talk outside
got me in the Thanksgiving mood.

I think I have a full turkey around here
somewhere.

But my oven is filthy.

I don't like this.

Sound like a dirty bird.

You aren't lying. This evidence is
debatable.

It sure was fun to talk about the 31st.

It would be unsanitary.

Well, hot wine is the most important
part. It sure is.

Uh -oh, this is my buster.

He must have smelled what's going on.

Silly dog, that's not for you.

It's so strong.

Look at that dad.

How about some nice scratches instead.

Look in your eyes, I see a paradise.

The world that I found, it's a love to
you.

There's a heaven inside the walls over
you.

There's love in my heart, and I feel it
in you.

Then say we're crazy.

relaxing weekend away with Beth.

It was time to get back to the case, so
I called the LA Chronicle news desk to

follow up on Douglas O 'Reilly, who was
informed that he hadn't made it into

work, so I headed to the police.

Douglas O 'Reilly, I don't want one of
you in the police corps.

Left in some kind of red liquid.

You got any paper towels?

I'm dragging it all over your place.

I picked up your knife for you.

Where do you want it?

Just record your name and say I did it.

Lieutenant Frank Drebin.

I did it.

Riley,

that you?

And that's when it hit me. Like an
idiot's finished jigsaw puzzle, I was

framed. I needed to clean the crime
scene.

No body, no hand.

Hiding the body was no longer a notion.

Freeze!

It's not what it looks like.

What?

I said stop.

Hello, Drebin. Mind if I take the wheel?

King, what's going on?

I've taken control of the car.

It's a little trick I have when I want
to fix mistakes.

So that's how Davenport died.

He didn't drive himself off a cliff. You
did. Now you're getting somewhere,

Detective. But not before he spilled
your ticket to that reporter.

So you went and killed him too?

I didn't kill him, Frank.

You did. You're the crazy cop who
stabbed the reporter and then drove

into the ocean.

Hell, I am.

There's no escape, Trevon.

I'm just a little sad that you won't be
there to see what I have in store when

the New Year's Eve balls drop.

Oh, well, have a nice evening.

Oh.

Hi, Susan.

Open the doors.

You got it.

Frank, are you okay? Where are you?
Never mind that.

I know how Simon Davenport was killed.
It was Richard King. He drove him off

cliff. Well, there's a warrant out for
your arrest.

You're claiming that you killed a
reporter.

Say it isn't so. It ain't so, Ed.

Here's another thing, Frank.

The mayor got wind of this whole mess
and they're pulling our funding.

What? We thought it shut down effective
immediately.

That's all because of me. I'll fix it.

Do me a favor, Frank. Lay low. You got
it. Thank you, Ed.

Excuse me. Do you have a phone I could
use?

Thanks.

As soon as I could, I called Beth to
break her the news.

It wasn't easy, but I hoped it would
bring her some peace.

What the hell?

Something big for tomorrow, for New
Year's Eve.

I'm willing to bet it, whatever time on
the phone to warm up about.

What do you mean, something big?

I don't know.

But people could be in danger.

I see.

Frank, I have a confession.

When my brother called me before he
died, he told me some things that I

told you.

To what?

He told me he was working on some kind
of therapeutic device.

Something to calm people down. But he
was worried now that someone could use

to do the opposite.

Calm people up?

He just told me that if anything were to
happen to him, I needed to do whatever

it took to stop the device.

Those were his last words to me. So
that's why you inserted yourself into my

investigation?

Well, at first.

And that's why you showed up at the
Bengal Club?

Yes.

And that's why you pretended to love me?

No, Frank.

No, how could you say that?

I can't believe I opened myself up to
love again.

I wrote that whole song about it. I
rented the studio space.

That's my TiVo that I lent you yesterday
so that you could watch season one of

Buffy so that you could start getting my
references.

I know that, Frank. And I specifically
told you not to plug it into the

Internet. Oh.

Oh? That's an Ethernet cord going from
my TiVo directly into your router where

the Internet comes from. I was just
trying to plug it into the Internet.

And now they might be expired. That
means gone.

No musical special.

No thunder.

No spike.

No cardivia, too.

No Daniel Oz on the farm. No Willow
meets her doppelganger in the field.

Nothing. Harry, I didn't know they were
coming.

Frank,

we're in the middle of an important
conversation.

Ed had dug through the bank footage and
identified a man who slipped out the

back, who also happened to be Kane's
head of security and right -hand man.

If anyone knew Kane's plan, it would be
Ed.

We needed to get him along and put the
squeeze on him, but we had to do it on

our own way, off of the books. We're on
our way now.

You're not my normal driver.

This isn't my normal car.

That's not my normal guy.

This is the normal way I call it.

Hello, doctor. He's waking up.

Thank you.

January 2nd. He's been here... for three
days. Three days.

Can you turn that up, please?

That won't be necessary, miss.

Hello, Mr.

Gustafsson. You, to write the theme.

Your little plan, it didn't work out.

We've stopped it.

But you guys won.

Kane's in jail.

And here's the bad news for you.

He's singing.

You told us you killed Simon Davenport
and that reporter.

I was told you might get the chair for
this.

You're wrong.

Am I?

Then tell me what really happened.

You're right.

Tough guy, huh?

You know what happens to big, pretty
boys like you and Sam Quentin?

Ooh, they're gonna love you.

Are you talking right? Oh, yeah. I've
seen it a hundred times.

Massive cutie pie like you.

You'll be very mouthy.

Or stay in. Probably have your mugshot
go viral online.

The Sexy Jailbird.

Congrats, you're famous.

Okay. Then one day, you'll be standing
on a hands -on legal toll.

And suddenly, you're free. You're back
on the street.

It's not bad. Only now, you've got a
minute to uphold.

The Sexy Jailbird.

Stick a bite of curd. Hello,
intermittent fasting.

You like ramen?

Well, it's all broth for you, baby.

Not to mention, there's a new sexy
jailbird now.

And he's all about body positivity.

He's eating burgers on the prison
Instagram when you're starving to death.

But you're branded. You can't change
court now.

So you decide to end it.

There! Bullet in the head!

I won't do that. But you miss.

You only get the part of the brain that
regulates farts.

Now you're a new meme farting guy.

Is that what you want?

Maybe Harding Guy, no? Come on! Tell me!
Harding Guy! You love it! No! Tell me!

Stop it! You love it! It was all Kate's
plan. It wasn't my plan.

What was it?

I ain't lost the frequency.

No, I wouldn't infect people's brains in
10 minutes.

I'm probably going to do that at the WWF
C -5 downtown in the night. I'm

actually going to put this device in the
New Year's ball.

The ball.

I want a lawyer, okay?

I'm sorry that we framed you. I'm sorry.

Did you get all that?

Every word.

I don't have much time.

What?

What is happening?

No, getting a confession like this is
legal.

Sometimes to get the job done, you have
to break the law.

I do it all the time.

Did we get all that?

General there, you're under arrest for
the illegal detainment of Sigtis Dawson.

No. Ah, sorry, you set me up. I'm
passive.

I just want to thank you. How were you
able to build these sets so quickly?

I just told some city contractors that I
sold their licenses if they didn't help

us.

Did you get all that?

Loud and clear.

Victor Gutierrez, Department of
Occupational Safety and Health. Officer

you are under arrest.

Thrilled to be joined in the broadcast
group by one of the most vicious bare

-knuckle brawlers from the first season
of WWFC, Dan the Bloody Widowmaker Daly.

Welcome, Dan.

It's weird. I left my wife at home and
she was wearing makeup. Said she didn't

have any plans.

What do you think that's about?

I don't know. Me neither.

And of course, none of this would be
possible without tonight's sponsor, Eden

Peck's Richard Cage.

The boys in the lab alone may need
special earplugs. They block digital

frequency. So if that bomb does go off,
we're protected.

Nice work.

Now, where's Kane? Kane is in the
skybox.

What about backup?

There is no backup.

What? The one in Ramona.

But good staff can confess.

We coerced him. Haven't you ever heard
of the Miranda Law?

That's pretty cool.

It's very good, right?

Amanda is a lawyer.

Charlotte's an art dealer.

Samantha's a whore.

What? What is it?

We need to call Bedford out. Excuse me,
I can... I can't hear you.

Hi!

From scary downtown Los Angeles!

This is the main event of the evening!

Is that... Yes?

Love your new look. Thank you.

Please, join me.

Check,

check. I'm on my way to the balls.

Okay, break. Tom's working.

I'm in commission.

We have 25 minutes.

Hey, one beer, please.

We're closed.

Come on, one beer's not going to kill
you.

One beer.

Good luck.

How much?

It's free. Get the hell out of here.

Ed, can you hear me? I can hear you,
Frank.

Uh -oh. I think one of Ken's goons is up
there.

Frank, can you hear me?

Somebody's up there, Frank. A guy is up
there, Frank.

Is that Ed?

Never mind.

The tension in this arena is palpable.
The moment of truth is

here, folks.

Great, good boy. Now, I bet she's a
little deranged, but it's your fault.

She won't know your number.

housewife transforms herself into a
would -be assassin seeking revenge.

Hiding her.

And another in

the small of her back.

And a shotgun.

It's a beautiful let's wait.

Hey, you got free beer?

No, there's not.

Oh, boy.

Frank,

can you hear me?

It's as though we're having some
technical difficulties with the New

I can't. I might reach.

Uh... The pressure rocks!

What the hell is going on?

All right, I believe the TV network's
going to blur what's happening. So for

those of you back home, I will try to
paint the picture.

Where we find something quite
magnificent.

The main event, if you will. A grand
bratwurst.

Fit for the imperial court of the Kaiser
himself.

Or maybe a loaf of unbaked bread wearing
an afro wig.

I got it. I got it. I'm going to get
out.

All right. Get security down there now.

Something to see here, folks.

Police business. Please, carry on.

All right, buddy.

Time to go.

Now, listen to me, good.

My name is Frank Trevon from Police
Squad.

This event is now over. Everyone vacate
the premises immediately.

Now. Okay, playtime's over. Give me the
mic. Don't take another step, buddy.

That's it.

Do you like watching a real man kick
ass?

All right. Goodbye, everyone.

Have a good night.

All right. You, you, come with me. Tell
everybody to put in their frequency

plugs. I heard two.

We don't want to hurt what crazy you're
doing. Wait, Chief Frank. The device has

some lights on it.

Various holes.

Ways above.

One has three dogs.

There's some sort of timer on it. Except
at midnight.

Hello, Detective.

What's happening?

Stop right there.

Don't do it. I don't know. I don't know.
I don't know. I don't know. I don't

know.

Everything I'm doing is for guys like
us. Guys like us? Yes.

Powerful, righteous men.

I should give a damn.

You said it yourself.

The world was better before.

Four wheels move the body.

Two wheels move the soul.

Famous quote I got.

Poop .com.

Yeah. What do you want me to do with
her?

Leave her here.

She'll be back by morning.

This fellow's going to ride, right?

Yeah!

Stay back.

I don't want to hurt you.

What do we do?

Come on! We're now waiting!

Just like old times.

Come on!

Let me get this guy first.

Got him.

Okay, this guy on the right.

Stop playing around.

Thanks.

Hey, champ. Little Lord.

Yeah, here.

You've got the sphere shot.

Thanks.

That was no fun.

You still got it, Daddy.

change.

It's not too late to stop this madness.

This is madness, Trevin.

This is progress.

Progress. The needs of the few should
never outweigh the needs of the many. It

was a time when you knew that.

So it's come to this.

The culmination of our journey.

All this, this stuff that's taken place
between you and me.

This, uh... Thanks, Dave. I got it. I'm
so sorry. I messed up the lines a little

bit.

Anyway, look at us. Isn't this
beautiful?

Exactly as nature intended.

Two great Kodiak bears facing one
another in an epic battle for dominance.

If it's a fight you want, very well.

You've never actually been in a fight
before?

Yeah, I have.

Oh my god, I think I'm gonna barf.

Is that normal?

You wanna keep fighting?

What? No!

My tummy still hurts a lot.

Well in that case, I'm gonna arrest you.

You can't arrest me. You still didn't
catch me. There's nowhere to run. I

be running.

I'll be flying.

I won't be hurting anyone anymore.

It's over.

Not for me, is it?

Please, think about this.

Killing him won't fix anything.

Why did I let him live?

It won't bring Simon back.

You don't know that for sure.

You're right.

Anything is possible.

But you have to let the justice system
do its job.

That's rich coming from you.

The truth is, Beth, once you kill a man
for a man, there's no going back. It

stays with you forever, following you
like a shadow.

A voice in your head saying over and
over, man, that was awesome.

So put the gun down, if not for me, then
for us, for our future together.

I love you, Beth.

Don't throw it all away for a few
seconds of the best feeling you would

have in your life.

Oh, wake up.

You've got the promotion.

Not bad for a stubborn old fool.

I guess old men really are the toughest,
smartest, most capable, sexiest beings

on the planet.

Oh, Frank.

You made me a very happy woman.