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Narrator: Coming up...
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Fetch, Joe, fetch.
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Narrator: The guys throw
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Joe to the dogs.
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[ Laughter ]
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Murr triggers some road rage.
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[ Laughter ]
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And q gives his regards to
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Broadway.
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May have heard it.
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It's called
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"cameltoe the musical."
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Narrator: Plus, tonight's big
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loser makes his big-screen
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debut.
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Aah!
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We're in puppy city today
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where we're gonna have to sell
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puppies.
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We've got to do and say
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whatever the other guys tell us
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to.
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Please, please, Joe.
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It's not a toy, Joe. Joe!
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I got piss on me.
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The guy who worked here told me
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in 30 years, he's got pee on him
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twice.
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I'm not here for five minutes.
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The dog pissed all over me.
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I got pissed on by that.
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[ Laughter ]
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Look around for a lost puppy.
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Where's Natasha? Natasha?
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Go ahead, go.
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Where the heck is Natasha?
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Natasha? Natasha?
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Natash... Natasha?
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[ Sighs ] Natasha.
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All puppies his size and from
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where he came from...
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freeze.
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[ Laughter ]
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Freeze.
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Don't move a muscle.
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Hold it, man. Hold it.
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The dog is frozen.
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The dog is not moving.
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[ Laughter ]
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Hold it.
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She's staring at you. Hold it.
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I know your arms are killing
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you.
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Feel the burn, baby.
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Go ahead. Go, go.
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So, they basically stay to
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about 15 pounds.
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[ Laughter ]
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Good boy. He's a good boy.
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[ Ding! ]
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Oh, my god.
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Oh, the bulldog.
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Yes.
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Anyway, here's your puppy.
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Buddy, if you could honk this
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customer's nose, that'd be
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awesome.
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[ Laughter ]
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Oh, my god.
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Well, that's something that's
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not gonna happen, is it, little
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dog?
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Honk the puppy's nose.
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Come here. Honk, honk.
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Now honk his nose.
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No.
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[ Buzzer ]
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[ Laughter ]
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Hello, ladies.
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Welcome to puppy city.
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How are you?
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Isn't he a cutie?
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Do you have a puppy?
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"Do you plan on
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breast-feeding?"
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Are you planning on
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breast-feeding?
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Ask her if she's interested
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in a chihuahua.
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Are you interested in
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chihuahuas at all?
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"'Cause it would fit
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perfectly between your bosom."
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[ Laughs ]
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The chihuahuas are really tiny,
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so they fit perfectly right in
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your chest, you know, in your
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bosom.
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[ Laughter ]
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"Look at those puppies."
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That is some set of puppies.
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[ Laughter ]
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"Do you know why that dog's
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breath smells?"
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Do you know why dog breath
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smells?
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"It's 'cause they lick their
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[bleep]"
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[ Laughter ]
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Their bad hygiene.
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[ Buzzer ]
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Take a puppy out of the cage,
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Joe.
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Mm-hmm.
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And smell its ass.
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He's gonna do it, I'm telling
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you.
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I think this is the right
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one.
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[ Sniffs ]
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Ohh!!
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No, I just... [ Sniffs ]
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You make sure, you know.
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That's how you tell who's who.
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Right, Melissa?
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[ Sniffs ]
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You know, they have different
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smells.
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Go ahead.
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[ Sniffs ]
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Ohh!
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What are people thinking?
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Wow!
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Joe, grab that toy and have
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one of the girls throw it for
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you.
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I'm just gonna show you how
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fetching works.
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Please, just throw it.
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Thank you.
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Fetch, Joe, fetch.
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[ Laughter ]
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[ Growling ]
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Start humping her leg now.
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Start humping her leg.
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Ugh!
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Keep going!
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[ Ding! ]
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Honk, honk, honk.
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Narrator: So, it's q and murr
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that got bit at the puppy store.
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There's nothing better than
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a dog in my opinion.
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I like cats better than dogs.
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I know.
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I don't like them at all.
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I don't trust them.
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Cats are on my list of most
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hated things.
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Why do you have a thing about
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cats?
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They stand in my driveway.
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I can't get to my front door.
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We stand there and look at each
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other.
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I'm like...
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[ Laughter ]
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Everybody knows the best part
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of a baseball game is the
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cheering.
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The challenge is to start the
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lamest chants possible.
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But we've written the chants for
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each other.
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You have to get people to
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chant along with you, and
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whoever can't do that loses.
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Narrator: Murr and Joe are
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benched for this one.
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So it's sal versus q.
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You ready to go, buddy?
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Let's see if you can get that
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crowd chanting.
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Pull your chant out of your
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pocket.
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[ Sighs ]
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[ Chanting ] Let's get sexy!
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Let's get sexy!
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Let's get sexy!
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You look like such an idiot.
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Let's get sexy!
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Let's get sexy!
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Nobody.
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Nobody's chanting.
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Nobody. You're useless.
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Let's get sexy!
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No, you're not sexy at all.
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[ Buzzer ]
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There's nothing sexy about you.
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All right, q, let's go.
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Let's see what you got.
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[ Laughs ]
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All right, q, let's go.
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Let's see what you got.
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[ Laughs ]
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"My wife left me?"
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Crowds don't take to Quinn.
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I can't do this.
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[ Chanting ] My wife left me!
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He's sitting by himself.
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That's the best part.
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My wife left me!
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[ Crowd boos ]
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He gave up.
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He's leaving.
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He's done.
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[ Buzzer ]
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It's not even a baseball
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chant.
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[ Laughter ]
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"My wife left me?"
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Woman goes like this... she
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goes...
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"Ohh!"
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Narrator: Q has nothing to
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cheer about now that he's been
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left alone in last place.
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As one of your best friends,
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I don't think you enjoy life as
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much as you should.
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That's fine.
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I would agree with that, but
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I don't think you guys worry as
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much as you should.
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[ Laughter ]
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We have made it to Broadway.
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We'll be posing as producers
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in need of investors for our
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newest musical.
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Okay, but here's the rub...
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We don't know anything about the
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show.
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All our information is being fed
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to us via these "q" cards.
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The goal is to raise the most
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money for your fake play.
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Whoever gets the least amount of
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scharole loses.
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[ Buzzer ]
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He's going in.
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I'm out here raising support
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for a new off-Broadway show i'm
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doing.
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I'm out here busting my hump.
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It's called...
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"Scott baio on ice."
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It's... there's a song from it.
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It's a little edgy.
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It's...
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It's "I lost count after three
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[bleep]" Was one of the... it's
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one of the... you may have heard
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it before.
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♪ Oh, hos and pimps, they do
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their tricks, but I lost count
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at three [bleep] ♪
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oh, my god!
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Anyway, I'm getting people
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out here to give us some
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donations.
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Oh, that's okay. I can exchange.
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It's fine, whatever you have,
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you know, a peso.
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Unbelievable... $1 Canadian and
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then $1 American.
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Perfect. Thank you so much.
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That wasn't a bad song I made
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up... hos and tricks.
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Hey, how you doing, buddy?
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I'm getting signatures over here
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for a Broadway play.
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Ignored him.
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Didn't break stride.
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I'm a producer of a Broadway
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play over here.
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You don't like Broadway plays?
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Consistent with every show
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we've ever done... no one wants
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to talk to q... consistent.
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I'm not made for this sort of
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thing.
292
00:08:11,955 --> 00:08:13,653
I'm not made for canvassing.
293
00:08:13,654 --> 00:08:14,787
I'm an astronaut.
294
00:08:14,788 --> 00:08:16,420
I come from another planet.
295
00:08:16,421 --> 00:08:18,120
I'm here to suck your brains
296
00:08:18,121 --> 00:08:18,588
out.
297
00:08:18,589 --> 00:08:19,653
My name's Brian.
298
00:08:19,654 --> 00:08:21,453
I'm a producer for an aspiring
299
00:08:21,454 --> 00:08:22,553
Broadway show.
300
00:08:22,554 --> 00:08:23,488
Finally.
301
00:08:23,489 --> 00:08:25,387
You may have heard of it.
302
00:08:25,388 --> 00:08:27,153
It's called, uh, uh... Hmm.
303
00:08:27,154 --> 00:08:28,088
It's called
304
00:08:28,089 --> 00:08:29,687
"cameltoe the musical."
305
00:08:29,688 --> 00:08:31,653
It's about a bunch of hookers
306
00:08:31,654 --> 00:08:34,553
who start a daycare center.
307
00:08:34,554 --> 00:08:36,220
Anything you have, it gets you a
308
00:08:36,221 --> 00:08:37,887
producer credit.
309
00:08:37,888 --> 00:08:38,354
Yes.
310
00:08:38,355 --> 00:08:39,987
A dollar does it. A dollar.
311
00:08:39,988 --> 00:08:41,087
Unbelievable.
312
00:08:41,088 --> 00:08:42,887
This kid gave him a dollar.
313
00:08:42,888 --> 00:08:44,287
How about you, sir?
314
00:08:44,288 --> 00:08:45,521
Any amount of money.
315
00:08:45,554 --> 00:08:46,887
A quarter. All right!
316
00:08:46,888 --> 00:08:47,988
Broadway producerght!
317
00:08:48,021 --> 00:08:49,053
Extraordinaire.
318
00:08:49,054 --> 00:08:50,553
Why are you so happy?
319
00:08:50,554 --> 00:08:52,053
You're in last place.
320
00:08:52,054 --> 00:08:53,320
All right, sal, you got to
321
00:08:53,321 --> 00:08:53,921
beat $1.25.
322
00:08:53,922 --> 00:08:55,120
I'm producing a Broadway
323
00:08:55,121 --> 00:08:55,488
show.
324
00:08:55,489 --> 00:08:56,687
You might have heard of it.
325
00:08:56,688 --> 00:08:58,053
There's billboards all over the
326
00:08:58,054 --> 00:08:58,454
place.
327
00:08:58,455 --> 00:09:00,620
It's a story of an orphan
328
00:09:00,621 --> 00:09:02,953
trapped inside Hugh Grant's
329
00:09:02,954 --> 00:09:06,187
butthole.
330
00:09:06,188 --> 00:09:07,387
Yeah, it's out there.
331
00:09:07,388 --> 00:09:09,053
He's not getting a penny from
332
00:09:09,054 --> 00:09:09,754
this lady.
333
00:09:09,755 --> 00:09:11,387
Even the smallest, smallest,
334
00:09:11,388 --> 00:09:12,354
little donation.
335
00:09:12,355 --> 00:09:14,853
Oh, ho, ho!
336
00:09:14,854 --> 00:09:16,120
That's a buck right there.
337
00:09:16,121 --> 00:09:17,021
Hello. How are you?
338
00:09:17,021 --> 00:09:17,421
Hi.
339
00:09:17,422 --> 00:09:18,587
I'm a producer of a new
340
00:09:18,588 --> 00:09:19,321
Broadway play.
341
00:09:19,322 --> 00:09:20,387
It's a really cool play.
342
00:09:20,388 --> 00:09:21,288
It's very artistic.
343
00:09:21,289 --> 00:09:24,053
It's called "puke."
344
00:09:24,054 --> 00:09:25,287
Yeah, believe it or not.
345
00:09:25,288 --> 00:09:26,587
It's... it's about... it's
346
00:09:26,588 --> 00:09:28,020
about... it's about puke, you
347
00:09:28,021 --> 00:09:29,487
know, and you might have heard
348
00:09:29,488 --> 00:09:30,254
the hit song.
349
00:09:30,255 --> 00:09:31,820
They actually started playing it
350
00:09:31,821 --> 00:09:34,487
on some local airways called
351
00:09:34,488 --> 00:09:35,987
"puke."
352
00:09:35,988 --> 00:09:36,821
You got that?
353
00:09:36,821 --> 00:09:37,788
'Cause I got it.
354
00:09:37,789 --> 00:09:39,453
It's a show called "puke," about
355
00:09:39,454 --> 00:09:41,087
puke and the hit song is named
356
00:09:41,088 --> 00:09:41,621
"puke."
357
00:09:41,621 --> 00:09:42,488
Puke, okay.
358
00:09:42,489 --> 00:09:44,187
Yeah, so, all we need is like
359
00:09:44,188 --> 00:09:47,020
two bucks.
360
00:09:47,021 --> 00:09:48,453
I think he's gonna get it.
361
00:09:48,454 --> 00:09:49,953
He's not gonna get enough to
362
00:09:49,954 --> 00:09:50,521
not lose.
363
00:09:50,522 --> 00:09:51,787
Oh, thank you so much.
364
00:09:51,788 --> 00:09:52,488
How much?
365
00:09:52,488 --> 00:09:53,188
60 cents.
366
00:09:53,188 --> 00:09:53,921
60 cents?
367
00:09:53,921 --> 00:09:54,888
That beats him.
368
00:09:54,888 --> 00:09:55,754
You beat him.
369
00:09:55,754 --> 00:09:56,421
Oh, yes!
370
00:09:56,422 --> 00:09:58,121
[ Ding! ]
371
00:10:00,621 --> 00:10:01,621
How are you, folks?
372
00:10:01,622 --> 00:10:02,987
I'm telling people about the new
373
00:10:02,988 --> 00:10:04,153
show that I have coming to
374
00:10:04,154 --> 00:10:04,654
Broadway.
375
00:10:04,655 --> 00:10:06,053
Story line, it's... it's about a
376
00:10:06,054 --> 00:10:07,387
Russian baby who starts a blog.
377
00:10:07,388 --> 00:10:08,720
It's kind of like a puppet show
378
00:10:08,721 --> 00:10:09,221
of sorts.
379
00:10:09,222 --> 00:10:10,553
It's got a hit song in it, too.
380
00:10:10,554 --> 00:10:11,753
It's a really popular song.
381
00:10:11,754 --> 00:10:14,087
It's "wash my backside."
382
00:10:14,088 --> 00:10:15,021
Ever heard of it?
383
00:10:15,022 --> 00:10:16,253
It's... it's Elton John.
384
00:10:16,254 --> 00:10:17,154
You've heard it?
385
00:10:17,155 --> 00:10:18,487
If there's one thing you're
386
00:10:18,488 --> 00:10:19,853
gonna love, it's washing my
387
00:10:19,854 --> 00:10:21,620
backside.
388
00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:22,653
Nothing.
389
00:10:22,654 --> 00:10:24,020
Loser.
390
00:10:24,021 --> 00:10:25,253
Narrator: Murr flopped on
391
00:10:25,254 --> 00:10:26,520
Broadway, and that gives us a
392
00:10:26,521 --> 00:10:28,187
two-way tie for last.
393
00:10:28,188 --> 00:10:29,520
Q used to be the lead in all
394
00:10:29,521 --> 00:10:30,553
the high-school plays.
395
00:10:30,554 --> 00:10:31,920
Let's clear the decks on this
396
00:10:31,921 --> 00:10:32,254
one.
397
00:10:32,255 --> 00:10:33,453
We went to an all-boys high
398
00:10:33,454 --> 00:10:33,921
school.
399
00:10:33,922 --> 00:10:35,220
The only way to meet girls and
400
00:10:35,221 --> 00:10:36,553
make out backstage was by doing
401
00:10:36,554 --> 00:10:37,121
the plays.
402
00:10:37,121 --> 00:10:37,888
It's that easy.
403
00:10:37,889 --> 00:10:39,187
Q was the real-life "glee."
404
00:10:39,188 --> 00:10:42,187
You realize that, right?
405
00:10:42,188 --> 00:10:43,587
We are being sent into the
406
00:10:43,588 --> 00:10:44,987
park with this remote-control
407
00:10:44,988 --> 00:10:45,354
car.
408
00:10:45,355 --> 00:10:46,687
The only catch is, this is a
409
00:10:46,688 --> 00:10:47,421
dummy remote.
410
00:10:47,422 --> 00:10:48,920
I'm gonna stand there in the
411
00:10:48,921 --> 00:10:50,053
crowd and look like i'm
412
00:10:50,054 --> 00:10:50,888
controlling it.
413
00:10:50,889 --> 00:10:52,353
While the rest of us will be
414
00:10:52,354 --> 00:10:53,888
controlling from afar.
415
00:10:53,921 --> 00:10:55,053
But you cannot say you're
416
00:10:55,054 --> 00:10:55,954
sorry, no matter what.
417
00:10:55,955 --> 00:11:02,988
No excuses, nothing.
418
00:11:03,021 --> 00:11:04,220
The guy in the t-shirt... hit
419
00:11:04,221 --> 00:11:04,521
him.
420
00:11:04,522 --> 00:11:05,620
Hit him. Hit him. Hit him.
421
00:11:05,621 --> 00:11:06,488
I am gonna hit him.
422
00:11:06,488 --> 00:11:07,354
[ Laughter ]
423
00:11:07,355 --> 00:11:08,787
Ah, don't apologize.
424
00:11:08,788 --> 00:11:10,020
That's my truck.
425
00:11:10,021 --> 00:11:10,888
Yeah, it is.
426
00:11:10,889 --> 00:11:12,320
This isn't intentional.
427
00:11:12,321 --> 00:11:13,288
What the...
428
00:11:13,289 --> 00:11:14,787
oh.
429
00:11:14,788 --> 00:11:16,620
It's just hitting your shoes
430
00:11:16,621 --> 00:11:23,120
again and again, man.
431
00:11:23,121 --> 00:11:24,121
Get her.
432
00:11:24,121 --> 00:11:24,621
Aah!
433
00:11:24,622 --> 00:11:27,953
[ Laughter ]
434
00:11:27,954 --> 00:11:29,820
Look at her trying to get
435
00:11:29,821 --> 00:11:30,388
away.
436
00:11:30,389 --> 00:11:32,287
He did not say "I'm sorry"
437
00:11:32,288 --> 00:11:33,420
the whole time.
438
00:11:33,421 --> 00:11:35,288
[ Ding! ]
439
00:11:37,554 --> 00:11:38,720
Look at this. Look at this.
440
00:11:38,721 --> 00:11:40,387
Look at this.
441
00:11:40,388 --> 00:11:42,720
You're ramming it up her.
442
00:11:42,721 --> 00:11:45,053
You're parking it her garage.
443
00:11:45,054 --> 00:11:46,753
Go for the family sitting
444
00:11:46,754 --> 00:11:47,288
down.
445
00:11:47,289 --> 00:11:51,953
[ Laughter ]
446
00:11:51,954 --> 00:11:55,287
Now go for her friend.
447
00:11:55,288 --> 00:11:56,553
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
448
00:11:56,554 --> 00:11:57,288
I apologize.
449
00:11:57,289 --> 00:11:58,387
That's an apology.
450
00:11:58,388 --> 00:11:59,653
That's his 10th apology.
451
00:11:59,654 --> 00:12:00,521
What a wuss.
452
00:12:00,522 --> 00:12:01,753
[ Buzzer ]
453
00:12:01,754 --> 00:12:03,587
Here we go.
454
00:12:03,588 --> 00:12:05,253
Time to get Joe's ass kicked.
455
00:12:05,254 --> 00:12:06,587
Get them. Get them.
456
00:12:06,588 --> 00:12:07,588
Aah!
457
00:12:07,589 --> 00:12:08,987
[ Chuckles ]
458
00:12:08,988 --> 00:12:10,120
It's a remote-control car.
459
00:12:10,121 --> 00:12:11,153
It really doesn't hurt.
460
00:12:11,154 --> 00:12:12,520
It's just a nice day in the park
461
00:12:12,521 --> 00:12:13,488
to be driving around.
462
00:12:13,488 --> 00:12:14,488
Hit them. Hit them.
463
00:12:14,489 --> 00:12:15,520
I am gonna hit them.
464
00:12:15,521 --> 00:12:16,154
[ Laughter ]
465
00:12:16,155 --> 00:12:19,487
You guys are such [bleep]
466
00:12:19,488 --> 00:12:21,620
Get the bride. Get the bride.
467
00:12:21,621 --> 00:12:23,753
Don't... don't get the bride.
468
00:12:23,754 --> 00:12:25,287
Oh, oh, oh, batteries.
469
00:12:25,288 --> 00:12:27,420
Nope, don't say you're sorry.
470
00:12:27,421 --> 00:12:29,320
Oh, those are nice shoes.
471
00:12:29,321 --> 00:12:30,254
Oh, whoops.
472
00:12:30,255 --> 00:12:32,987
Enjoy the park.
473
00:12:32,988 --> 00:12:33,554
[ Ding! ]
474
00:12:33,555 --> 00:12:34,953
He never said he was sorry.
475
00:12:34,954 --> 00:12:36,320
Sal's a big softie, so you
476
00:12:36,321 --> 00:12:37,587
know he's gonna apologize.
477
00:12:37,588 --> 00:12:40,987
Get that guy with the backpack.
478
00:12:40,988 --> 00:12:42,487
Nice shot.
479
00:12:42,488 --> 00:12:45,487
Say you're sorry, sal.
480
00:12:45,488 --> 00:12:46,820
Now hit the girl.
481
00:12:46,821 --> 00:12:52,153
[ Laughter ]
482
00:12:52,154 --> 00:12:52,854
Sorry.
483
00:12:52,855 --> 00:12:54,687
I'll kick it if you do it next.
484
00:12:54,688 --> 00:12:56,553
Get her again. Get her again.
485
00:12:56,554 --> 00:12:57,921
[ Laughter ]
486
00:13:03,021 --> 00:13:04,520
[ Laughter ]
487
00:13:04,521 --> 00:13:05,620
Oh, she's pissed.
488
00:13:05,621 --> 00:13:06,987
You better apologize, sal.
489
00:13:06,988 --> 00:13:08,153
How are you doing?
490
00:13:08,154 --> 00:13:09,088
It's a nice day.
491
00:13:09,089 --> 00:13:10,753
It's a nice day.
492
00:13:10,754 --> 00:13:14,287
I'm just enjoying the park.
493
00:13:14,288 --> 00:13:15,254
Hit her again.
494
00:13:15,255 --> 00:13:16,320
Go ahead, dude.
495
00:13:16,321 --> 00:13:19,421
She wants to battle.
496
00:13:31,588 --> 00:13:32,421
Go ahead, dude.
497
00:13:32,421 --> 00:13:33,288
She wants to battle.
498
00:13:33,289 --> 00:13:35,953
Okay. Hit her again.
499
00:13:35,954 --> 00:13:39,120
Oh!
500
00:13:39,121 --> 00:13:40,953
No!
501
00:13:40,954 --> 00:13:46,120
All: Ohh!
502
00:13:46,121 --> 00:13:46,688
Ohh!
503
00:13:46,689 --> 00:13:47,920
We should get a toy
504
00:13:47,921 --> 00:13:48,621
submarine.
505
00:13:48,622 --> 00:13:50,120
That's what no sorry gets
506
00:13:50,121 --> 00:13:50,554
you.
507
00:13:50,554 --> 00:13:51,188
[ Ding! ]
508
00:13:51,189 --> 00:13:52,888
Oh, my god.
509
00:13:52,921 --> 00:13:55,954
Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.
510
00:13:55,988 --> 00:13:57,820
Narrator: Sorry, murr, you're
511
00:13:57,821 --> 00:13:59,653
in the lead for last.
512
00:13:59,654 --> 00:14:00,554
I'm a fan of the
513
00:14:00,555 --> 00:14:01,787
passive-aggressive apology.
514
00:14:01,788 --> 00:14:03,153
It's like, "look, I didn't mean
515
00:14:03,154 --> 00:14:04,420
to upset you, but if you got
516
00:14:04,421 --> 00:14:05,720
upset, I'm sorry that you got
517
00:14:05,721 --> 00:14:06,188
upset."
518
00:14:06,189 --> 00:14:07,453
I'm not admitting I'm wrong.
519
00:14:07,454 --> 00:14:08,753
No, I'm just realizing how
520
00:14:08,754 --> 00:14:10,087
many times you've done that to
521
00:14:10,088 --> 00:14:10,821
me in my life.
522
00:14:10,821 --> 00:14:11,788
You're a real [bleep]
523
00:14:11,788 --> 00:14:12,454
[ Laughter ]
524
00:14:12,455 --> 00:14:13,820
I'm sorry you feel that way.
525
00:14:13,821 --> 00:14:17,820
[ Laughter ]
526
00:14:17,821 --> 00:14:19,487
Four idiots are about to
527
00:14:19,488 --> 00:14:21,387
teach golf.
528
00:14:21,388 --> 00:14:22,753
We will be teaching students
529
00:14:22,754 --> 00:14:24,020
the tips and tricks on how to
530
00:14:24,021 --> 00:14:26,687
improve your game.
531
00:14:26,688 --> 00:14:27,920
How does one start a golf
532
00:14:27,921 --> 00:14:28,354
lesson?
533
00:14:28,355 --> 00:14:29,587
Q hasn't played a hole of
534
00:14:29,588 --> 00:14:30,388
golf in his life.
535
00:14:30,388 --> 00:14:31,321
Hey. How are you?
536
00:14:31,322 --> 00:14:32,353
Right over here, buddy.
537
00:14:32,354 --> 00:14:33,188
How are you doing?
538
00:14:33,189 --> 00:14:34,453
How's it going, man? Amil.
539
00:14:34,454 --> 00:14:35,388
Good. Amil? Amil.
540
00:14:35,389 --> 00:14:36,720
Why don't you just hit a little
541
00:14:36,721 --> 00:14:39,520
and let me see what we got.
542
00:14:39,521 --> 00:14:40,488
"That one sucked."
543
00:14:40,489 --> 00:14:41,920
All right, that one sucked.
544
00:14:41,921 --> 00:14:42,821
I'm not gonna lie.
545
00:14:42,821 --> 00:14:43,521
[ Laughter ]
546
00:14:43,521 --> 00:14:44,488
My advice to you...
547
00:14:44,489 --> 00:14:45,953
"Is to hit the ball further."
548
00:14:45,954 --> 00:14:47,453
just hit the ball further.
549
00:14:47,454 --> 00:14:48,953
[ Laughter ]
550
00:14:48,954 --> 00:14:55,120
Q, give him a golf clap.
551
00:14:55,121 --> 00:14:56,187
Keep doing that all the way
552
00:14:56,188 --> 00:14:56,954
through his swing.
553
00:14:56,954 --> 00:14:57,921
You got to be able to
554
00:14:57,922 --> 00:14:59,120
concentrate right through this.
555
00:14:59,121 --> 00:15:00,353
I bet you hit the best thing you
556
00:15:00,354 --> 00:15:01,687
ever have right now.
557
00:15:01,688 --> 00:15:02,588
[ Laughter ]
558
00:15:02,589 --> 00:15:04,353
Q, tell him to hold on one
559
00:15:04,354 --> 00:15:05,853
second before he swings.
560
00:15:05,854 --> 00:15:07,420
All right, hold on one
561
00:15:07,421 --> 00:15:08,054
second.
562
00:15:08,055 --> 00:15:09,553
Go get the ball.
563
00:15:09,554 --> 00:15:11,553
Just lick it and then put it
564
00:15:11,554 --> 00:15:12,887
back.
565
00:15:12,888 --> 00:15:14,588
[ Laughter ]
566
00:15:19,721 --> 00:15:23,053
[ Spits ]
567
00:15:23,054 --> 00:15:25,453
[ Ding! ]
568
00:15:25,454 --> 00:15:26,553
Scott, how are you? Joe.
569
00:15:26,554 --> 00:15:27,454
How are you doing?
570
00:15:27,455 --> 00:15:28,720
Pleased to be meet you, man.
571
00:15:28,721 --> 00:15:30,453
Nice to meet you.
572
00:15:30,454 --> 00:15:31,753
"Cute top."
573
00:15:31,754 --> 00:15:32,887
[ Laughter ]
574
00:15:32,888 --> 00:15:35,220
"Cute top."
575
00:15:35,221 --> 00:15:37,220
That's a cute top.
576
00:15:37,221 --> 00:15:38,287
That's a cute top.
577
00:15:38,288 --> 00:15:39,820
Scratch the front of your
578
00:15:39,821 --> 00:15:40,953
pants with the club.
579
00:15:40,954 --> 00:15:42,587
We spread the legs a little
580
00:15:42,588 --> 00:15:44,287
bit, right, so we got the stance
581
00:15:44,288 --> 00:15:45,453
a little bit better.
582
00:15:45,454 --> 00:15:47,053
Now, it's up in the shoulders,
583
00:15:47,054 --> 00:15:48,787
so when you roll it, you want to
584
00:15:48,788 --> 00:15:50,487
make sure you roll the shoulders
585
00:15:50,488 --> 00:15:52,120
back and then bring it through.
586
00:15:52,121 --> 00:15:53,553
Follow all the way through.
587
00:15:53,554 --> 00:15:55,887
[ Laughter ]
588
00:15:55,888 --> 00:15:57,020
Joe, I want you to put your
589
00:15:57,021 --> 00:15:57,588
nose on him.
590
00:15:57,588 --> 00:15:58,488
Nose [bleep] this guy.
591
00:15:58,489 --> 00:15:59,687
Bring the club all the way up
592
00:15:59,688 --> 00:16:01,687
and hold it for me for a second.
593
00:16:01,688 --> 00:16:04,187
[ Laughter ]
594
00:16:04,188 --> 00:16:05,420
You should feel your body, the
595
00:16:05,421 --> 00:16:06,553
momentum coming up from the
596
00:16:06,554 --> 00:16:06,954
top...
597
00:16:06,954 --> 00:16:07,554
[ Laughter ]
598
00:16:07,555 --> 00:16:09,387
[ Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! ]
599
00:16:09,388 --> 00:16:10,620
And then back all the way
600
00:16:10,621 --> 00:16:11,121
through.
601
00:16:11,122 --> 00:16:12,520
All right, show-off, let's
602
00:16:12,521 --> 00:16:15,853
see you nose his hole-in-one.
603
00:16:15,854 --> 00:16:17,953
Come on, Joe, nose his butt,
604
00:16:17,954 --> 00:16:19,287
and we'll move on.
605
00:16:19,288 --> 00:16:20,221
Mnh-mnh.
606
00:16:20,222 --> 00:16:25,420
[ Buzzer ]
607
00:16:25,421 --> 00:16:26,188
What is your name?
608
00:16:26,188 --> 00:16:26,621
Sheila.
609
00:16:26,622 --> 00:16:27,687
Sheila, what do you think is
610
00:16:27,688 --> 00:16:28,720
the most problematic thing for
611
00:16:28,721 --> 00:16:29,754
you?
612
00:16:31,854 --> 00:16:32,854
The driving is the problem?
613
00:16:32,854 --> 00:16:33,788
"Well, you're a woman.
614
00:16:33,788 --> 00:16:34,488
Women can't drive.
615
00:16:34,489 --> 00:16:40,487
That's a known fact."
616
00:16:40,488 --> 00:16:42,353
Well, it's a well-known fact
617
00:16:42,354 --> 00:16:43,787
that women can't drive.
618
00:16:43,788 --> 00:16:44,654
[ Laughter ]
619
00:16:44,655 --> 00:16:45,920
[ Ding! ]
620
00:16:45,921 --> 00:16:47,220
Hey, Caesar, pleasure to meet
621
00:16:47,221 --> 00:16:47,521
you.
622
00:16:47,521 --> 00:16:48,154
How are you?
623
00:16:48,155 --> 00:16:49,387
Do a swing and then release
624
00:16:49,388 --> 00:16:50,687
the club and launch it over the
625
00:16:50,688 --> 00:16:51,753
ramp.
626
00:16:51,754 --> 00:16:53,087
Control is very important,
627
00:16:53,088 --> 00:16:57,420
you know, so watch and learn.
628
00:16:57,421 --> 00:16:59,587
[ Laughter ]
629
00:16:59,588 --> 00:17:04,087
That grip was all messed up.
630
00:17:04,088 --> 00:17:05,387
Just grab the ball and swing
631
00:17:05,388 --> 00:17:06,587
and miss as much as you can.
632
00:17:06,588 --> 00:17:07,787
It's all about focus, all
633
00:17:07,788 --> 00:17:08,221
right?
634
00:17:08,222 --> 00:17:10,353
All right, there.
635
00:17:10,354 --> 00:17:13,520
[ Laughter ]
636
00:17:13,521 --> 00:17:15,020
Oh [bleep]
637
00:17:15,021 --> 00:17:16,353
[ Laughter ]
638
00:17:16,354 --> 00:17:19,721
All right. Here we go.
639
00:17:24,088 --> 00:17:27,087
[ Laughter ]
640
00:17:27,088 --> 00:17:28,420
All you, Sam. It's not about me.
641
00:17:28,421 --> 00:17:30,820
[ Ding! ]
642
00:17:30,821 --> 00:17:31,754
Well, Joe lost.
643
00:17:31,755 --> 00:17:33,253
Put a quarter in your ass 'cause
644
00:17:33,254 --> 00:17:34,987
you played yourself.
645
00:17:34,988 --> 00:17:36,187
Narrator: Joe was off his
646
00:17:36,188 --> 00:17:37,420
game on that one, but murr is
647
00:17:37,421 --> 00:17:38,553
still tonight's big loser.
648
00:17:38,554 --> 00:17:39,653
It annoys me when they
649
00:17:39,654 --> 00:17:40,853
collect for charity before a
650
00:17:40,854 --> 00:17:41,321
movie.
651
00:17:41,322 --> 00:17:42,587
You know what else really annoys
652
00:17:42,588 --> 00:17:42,888
me?
653
00:17:42,888 --> 00:17:43,654
James Murray.
654
00:17:43,654 --> 00:17:44,654
That's right.
655
00:17:44,655 --> 00:17:46,153
So, tonight, we're at the movie
656
00:17:46,154 --> 00:17:47,553
theater combining two worlds.
657
00:17:47,554 --> 00:17:48,454
That's right.
658
00:17:48,455 --> 00:17:49,920
We are gonna show a promotional
659
00:17:49,921 --> 00:17:51,353
video to a packed house for a
660
00:17:51,354 --> 00:17:52,687
charity that doesn't exist.
661
00:17:52,688 --> 00:17:53,953
What's the charity for?
662
00:17:53,954 --> 00:17:54,621
Oh, god.
663
00:17:54,622 --> 00:17:56,087
We made the video and we don't
664
00:17:56,088 --> 00:17:57,088
even know, brother.
665
00:17:57,089 --> 00:17:58,453
Yeah, it's really a murky
666
00:17:58,454 --> 00:17:58,921
video.
667
00:17:58,922 --> 00:18:00,153
Have fun, will Rogers.
668
00:18:00,154 --> 00:18:01,453
More like won't Rogers.
669
00:18:01,454 --> 00:18:09,453
Hey-oh!
670
00:18:09,454 --> 00:18:12,953
Hi, everyone. How are you?
671
00:18:12,954 --> 00:18:14,787
My name is James Murray, and the
672
00:18:14,788 --> 00:18:16,553
theater has been kind enough to
673
00:18:16,554 --> 00:18:18,353
let me come out here to tell you
674
00:18:18,354 --> 00:18:19,853
about just an amazing new
675
00:18:19,854 --> 00:18:20,488
charity.
676
00:18:20,489 --> 00:18:24,654
So, let's begin.
677
00:18:25,654 --> 00:18:27,053
We are gonna show a
678
00:18:27,054 --> 00:18:28,753
promotional video to a packed
679
00:18:28,754 --> 00:18:30,587
house for a charity that doesn't
680
00:18:30,588 --> 00:18:31,621
exist.
681
00:18:31,654 --> 00:18:32,820
What's the charity for?
682
00:18:32,821 --> 00:18:34,087
Oh, god, we made the video
683
00:18:34,088 --> 00:18:35,453
and we don't even know, brother.
684
00:18:35,454 --> 00:18:36,687
Yeah, it's really a murky
685
00:18:36,688 --> 00:18:43,020
video.
686
00:18:43,021 --> 00:18:46,187
Hi, everyone. How are you?
687
00:18:46,188 --> 00:18:47,953
My name is James Murray, and the
688
00:18:47,954 --> 00:18:49,653
theater has been kind enough to
689
00:18:49,654 --> 00:18:51,387
let me come out here to tell you
690
00:18:51,388 --> 00:18:52,820
about just an amazing new
691
00:18:52,821 --> 00:18:54,420
charity that I'm actually the
692
00:18:54,421 --> 00:18:55,188
founder of.
693
00:18:55,189 --> 00:18:56,853
So, let's begin.
694
00:18:56,854 --> 00:19:00,020
The world is full of people.
695
00:19:00,021 --> 00:19:02,520
As you can see... tons of
696
00:19:02,521 --> 00:19:03,521
people.
697
00:19:03,522 --> 00:19:06,520
Like this one, for example.
698
00:19:06,521 --> 00:19:09,020
And this one.
699
00:19:09,021 --> 00:19:12,187
This girl...
700
00:19:12,188 --> 00:19:14,853
Got into some kind of trouble...
701
00:19:14,854 --> 00:19:16,020
[ Laughter ]
702
00:19:16,021 --> 00:19:16,754
and died.
703
00:19:16,755 --> 00:19:18,220
And I want you to think about
704
00:19:18,221 --> 00:19:19,753
that for a moment because what
705
00:19:19,754 --> 00:19:23,753
my charity does is...
706
00:19:23,754 --> 00:19:26,253
It helps people cope through
707
00:19:26,254 --> 00:19:27,420
music.
708
00:19:27,421 --> 00:19:29,587
[ Laughter ]
709
00:19:29,588 --> 00:19:30,588
[ Stammers ]
710
00:19:30,589 --> 00:19:35,587
Musicians...
711
00:19:35,588 --> 00:19:38,087
Musicians and their... and their
712
00:19:38,088 --> 00:19:39,420
banjos.
713
00:19:39,421 --> 00:19:40,553
Everyone following?
714
00:19:40,554 --> 00:19:42,153
And that's the reason... the
715
00:19:42,154 --> 00:19:43,720
reason why I got involved in
716
00:19:43,721 --> 00:19:45,421
this charity is because...
717
00:19:48,554 --> 00:19:51,887
Pigeons... let me tell you
718
00:19:51,888 --> 00:19:53,787
folks, pigeons need more places
719
00:19:53,788 --> 00:19:55,053
to have casual sex.
720
00:19:55,054 --> 00:19:55,921
Am I right?
721
00:19:55,921 --> 00:19:56,821
[ Laughter ]
722
00:19:56,821 --> 00:19:57,821
He's dying.
723
00:19:57,822 --> 00:19:59,453
So, my charity, we also
724
00:19:59,454 --> 00:20:01,953
promote proper hygiene.
725
00:20:01,954 --> 00:20:04,287
And I... and... is that...
726
00:20:04,288 --> 00:20:06,353
That's my toothbrush...
727
00:20:06,354 --> 00:20:07,587
[ Laughter ]
728
00:20:07,588 --> 00:20:10,253
that my roommate just put in
729
00:20:10,254 --> 00:20:15,253
the toilet.
730
00:20:15,254 --> 00:20:17,187
And that's me brushing my teeth
731
00:20:17,188 --> 00:20:17,888
with it.
732
00:20:17,889 --> 00:20:20,887
[ Laughter ]
733
00:20:20,888 --> 00:20:22,487
So, anyways, b-b-back on to the
734
00:20:22,488 --> 00:20:22,988
point.
735
00:20:22,989 --> 00:20:24,553
So, when you think about it...
736
00:20:24,554 --> 00:20:25,953
When you think about it...
737
00:20:25,954 --> 00:20:26,721
[ laughter ]
738
00:20:26,722 --> 00:20:30,053
You know, many people...
739
00:20:30,054 --> 00:20:31,887
Many people think three inches
740
00:20:31,888 --> 00:20:33,753
is not enough, and I'm telling
741
00:20:33,754 --> 00:20:34,754
you it can be.
742
00:20:34,755 --> 00:20:36,920
[ Laughter ]
743
00:20:36,921 --> 00:20:39,753
As folks are... are... asl...
744
00:20:39,754 --> 00:20:43,920
[ laughter ]
745
00:20:43,921 --> 00:20:47,587
Uh... you see...
746
00:20:47,588 --> 00:20:50,253
This... uh, uh, uh...
747
00:20:50,254 --> 00:20:52,587
It's before I... it's before I
748
00:20:52,588 --> 00:20:55,753
shaved my chest hair.
749
00:20:55,754 --> 00:21:01,487
I'm much more shaved now.
750
00:21:01,488 --> 00:21:03,387
That's our mission, and I ask
751
00:21:03,388 --> 00:21:04,853
you to please donate.
752
00:21:04,854 --> 00:21:07,520
[ Coin clinks ]
753
00:21:07,521 --> 00:21:09,520
[ Laughter ]
754
00:21:09,521 --> 00:21:10,853
So, I'll leave this up at the
755
00:21:10,854 --> 00:21:16,954
front here.
41970
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