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Why are we here?
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Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and
welcome to darkest Hollywood.
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Night brings a stillness to the jungle.
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It is so quiet you can hear a name drop.
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But the savage beasts have already begun
gathering at the waterholes to quench
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their thirst.
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Now one should be especially alert.
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The vicious table hopper is on the
prowl, and the spotted backbiter may
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behind a potted palm.
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In order to reach the scene of tonight's
story, our little safari must now move
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inexorably and incomprehensibly from
smoggy Hollywood to foggy London.
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Fortunately, we make this side trip
through the pure, exhilarating air of
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commercial television.
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Good evening. Are you Inspector Brent,
sir? That's right.
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Come in, sir. Major Cook Finch is
expecting you.
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If you'll just step this way.
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Inspector Brent, sir. Inspector Brent?
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How are you, Major?
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Peace the night out, isn't it? Yes, it's
just plain Mr.
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Brent these days, by the way.
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Yes, it's a bit damp out.
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Well, sir, it's good of you to help out
this way. Oh, not at all. Matter of
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fact, I'm quite keen to learn what's
going on. Yes, of course. But at the
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moment, I'd like to see your dining room
and speak to your man, Lane, I think
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you said his name was.
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Lane, yes, that's right. If you'll come
this way.
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Now, the dining room is in here.
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Yes, I remember.
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Oh, Lane, Inspector, Mr.
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Brent wants to consult with you. Please
make any arrangements he wants, will
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you? Yes, sir.
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A police officer has arrived, sir, from
Blackheath Station. Oh, good. I'll speak
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to him in a moment.
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Very good, sir.
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Well, I'll decant the wine.
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Did you find that particular gas valve I
mentioned to you on the telephone?
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Yes, sir. If we turn it nearly off, the
effect we experience is one of a failing
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supply.
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00:03:17,320 --> 00:03:21,979
Good. We'll go into that in a moment.
Now, I want you to turn off all the
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in the study there except the one by the
door. Very good, sir.
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Good of you to let me take over this
way, sir.
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Oh, not at all. I've only a vague idea
what this is all about, but you have
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rather whetted my curiosity, you know.
Yes, of course.
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Be pointless to go over all the details
twice, though, wouldn't it? Yes, I
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suppose it would.
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Exactly. So we wait for Mr. Stone. He'll
probably be along in a moment.
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Oh, Lane, where does the Major usually
sit?
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Over there, sir.
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Yes, well, that won't do tonight.
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You'll have to change it so he sits
here. Oh, but I always sit there.
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Yes, of course, but that won't do
tonight, you see, sir, with the ghost
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appearing over there.
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Odd. I thought he said ghost.
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Oh, now, Lane, yes.
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I shall sit here with Mr. Stone
opposite, and over there we shall have
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of honor.
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Very good, sir.
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I expect that's Mr. Stone now. Show him
in here, please.
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Good evening.
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Good evening.
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Will you kindly step this way, sir?
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Mr. Robert Stone.
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Oh, Mr. Stone. My dear friend. Let me
introduce you to our host, Major Cook
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Finch. Mr. Robert Stone. Major, how do
you do? Good of you to come. I hope you
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like Pheasant and the good claret. That
sounds encouraging, I must say.
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We're lucky it's Sunday, so Mr. Stone
could come. He's playing in Macbeth now,
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you know. Oh, yes, I hear it's a very
good play.
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I'm afraid, though, that the Tivoli is
rather more my style.
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I'm a great admirer of Gertie Guitar,
you know.
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I dare say.
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Disgraceful of you to drag me out on a
night like this, Brent.
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You'll have to provide something unique
and engrossing to make up for it. Oh,
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perhaps I shall.
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We're here to investigate a murder.
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Really?
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Exactly two years ago tonight, a murder
was committed in this house. In this
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very room, in fact.
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You may possibly have read about it at
the time.
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Major Cook Finch is familiar with it, of
course, since he took the house.
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Yes, I shouldn't have been able to
afford it otherwise.
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People shy away from places after that
sort of thing.
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Lucky for me, I suppose.
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00:05:22,470 --> 00:05:25,610
Oh, you're referring to the Blackheath
murder, of course.
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The murdered woman was an elderly lady,
a Miss Ferguson.
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She was apparently attacked as she sat
here eating a cold supper which her maid
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used to leave ready on her Sunday off.
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Miss Ferguson was found brutally
strangled with the meal half finished.
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Her little dog, a Pekingese, had been
killed too.
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00:05:44,491 --> 00:05:47,839
Yes, I remember reading about the dog.
The police seemed to think the murderer
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must have known it, otherwise it would
have barked. Yes, of course, it's not
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impossible that he might have caught and
killed the dog first, but it seems
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unlikely that he could have done it
without so much noise alarming Miss
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Ferguson. Well, wasn't there a suspect
in the case, a nephew or something? Yes,
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John Bedford. He was his aunt's sole
heir.
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But he had a very good alibi for the
time of the murder.
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Miles away, in fact.
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Oh, it couldn't have been Bedford. I met
him when I took the house.
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00:06:10,890 --> 00:06:12,170
Besides, he was at Eton.
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00:06:12,171 --> 00:06:15,889
But didn't I also read that the house
had been broken into and some silver
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stolen? That would seem to point to her
being killed by the burglar.
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Possibly she caught him in the act.
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Possibly, but it might simply have been
staged to make it look like a robbery.
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Well, I thought you were retired.
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Isn't the case someone else was headache
now?
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It was my case to begin with, and I
don't like it remaining unsolved.
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Oh, has Miss Thorpe arrived yet, Lane?
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No, sir, not yet. She said she might be
late. She'll come in the side entrance,
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show her into the study when she does.
Very good. And if we are at dinner,
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be very quiet about it, please.
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Yes, sir.
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Now...
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This may seem a little unusual at first.
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The yard would never permit it if I was
still there, of course, but they'll be
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happy to get the compliments if the plan
works out.
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I intend to produce Miss Ferguson's
ghost.
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He did say ghost.
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You've seen Miss Thorpe on the stage, I
expect. A superb actress.
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She's agreed to be our ghost.
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I gave her a copy of this photograph of
Miss Ferguson.
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She'd be wearing her hair the same way,
and I've seen her in her make -up. The
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likeness is absolutely perfect.
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Oh, Mary's a very fine actress, of
course. I never thought her queen in my
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hamlet quite measured up.
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But you've still got me thoroughly
confused, dear boy. I wish you'd explain
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little bit more.
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Oh, of course. Now, when she appears in
the doorway here, our last guest will
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see her, but we shan't.
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What? Why not?
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We simply look through her, that's all.
Just needs a bit of acting.
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Oh, really? Now, that's all very well
for Stone, but I'm not an actor, you
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I'm sure I could never bring it all.
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Of course you can, Major, and I'm
depending on you.
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Now, we won't bring her on with the
soup. That would be rushing it.
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I'm bringing her on with the pheasant.
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All right, Brent.
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I'll have a go at it. Good.
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Now, let me have a word with Sergeant
Balter a moment, and we'll all be
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here.
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Gentlemen, this is Sergeant Balter of
Blackheath Police Station. He's lending
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a hand tonight.
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Mr. Cookfinch? How are you? Mr. Stone,
Sergeant.
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Mr. Stone, good evening.
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You clear about everything now?
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Oh, yes, sir. Are you quite sure the
little fellow will do his part? Oh, yes,
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sir. It can depend on him, all right.
Good.
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Well, shall we go into the other room
and have a glass of sherry while we
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Yes.
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My dear friend, will you please settle
down long enough to tell us what you're
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trying to accomplish? Also, who our
other guest is. I assume you believe he
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the murderer.
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Well, naturally.
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And I'd like it all to seem quite
everyday, you understand. I mean,
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prearranged. All right. Well, assuming
we all act our parts perfectly and
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convince the man he sees Miss Ferguson's
ghost.
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What then?
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Well, I can't say for certain.
Naturally, I hope it'll cause him to
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himself some way.
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But it's only an experiment. I mean, it
may not work. But if he's really guilty,
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you do suppose he'll come here tonight,
the very anniversary of the day he
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committed the crime?
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Yes. I told him I got some new evidence
that I wanted to discuss with him. It'll
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look bad if he refuses, wouldn't it?
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Well, that must be our man now. But you
still haven't told us who it is.
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00:09:13,621 --> 00:09:17,279
Well, the nephew, John Bedford, of
course, he was the only one with a real
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motive. But he has a girl who's
infatuated with him, and she swears he
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her all that evening. We could never...
Good evening.
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Good evening, sir.
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Remember, we've only just got here.
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Mr. John Bedford, sir.
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And so I, uh... I took a step that
wasn't there, and, well, here I am.
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Doctor says it'll probably end its
condition in three or four weeks. I
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know. Spoiled all my golf, everything
else.
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Just the news.
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I haven't had a chance to see your
Macbeth yet.
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00:09:58,460 --> 00:09:59,510
Oh, I'm sorry.
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I hope it continues for a time. I should
like to see it very much. I'm a great
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admirer of yours.
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00:10:03,400 --> 00:10:05,960
Thank you. We're playing for another six
weeks.
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00:10:06,820 --> 00:10:09,000
You were at Eton, weren't you?
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00:10:09,470 --> 00:10:12,510
Not so very long after I was. About 30
years.
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00:10:12,810 --> 00:10:14,550
Yes, that's right. I heard about you.
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00:10:14,551 --> 00:10:18,069
They were still talking about that patch
you made against Tarrow when you fell
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00:10:18,070 --> 00:10:19,590
in somebody's veal and ham pie.
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00:10:20,370 --> 00:10:23,230
By Joe, Major, those are beautiful
birds.
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00:10:23,650 --> 00:10:25,250
Yes, I was lucky last week.
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00:10:25,450 --> 00:10:29,330
I bagged a brace of partridge and two
pheasants at Leavenhall Market.
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00:10:30,110 --> 00:10:34,009
I should say, we're the lucky ones. And
after that soup, too. I must say, you're
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cooked up, you proud, Major.
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00:10:35,610 --> 00:10:37,900
Yes, they do look rather edible, don't
they?
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00:10:38,310 --> 00:10:43,219
Oh. By the way, I meant to ask you what
this new development was before dinner
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00:10:43,220 --> 00:10:44,079
was announced.
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00:10:44,080 --> 00:10:47,799
Oh, it can wait till later. Nothing too
significant, as a matter of fact. I
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00:10:47,800 --> 00:10:52,839
don't know whether Inspector Brent told
you or not, but my aunt was murdered in
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00:10:52,840 --> 00:10:53,890
this house.
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00:10:53,920 --> 00:10:55,480
Here in this room, in fact.
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00:10:58,060 --> 00:10:59,110
Not really.
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00:10:59,360 --> 00:11:02,320
Must be a dreadful shock, a thing like
that. Yes, it was.
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00:11:03,160 --> 00:11:05,750
It was on a night something like this,
as I recall it.
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00:11:06,080 --> 00:11:09,510
About two years ago. In fact, it was
exactly two years ago, wasn't it?
200
00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:11,090
So it was.
201
00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:12,380
Two years ago tonight.
202
00:11:12,580 --> 00:11:16,380
Two years ago, and you still haven't
discovered the murderer, really? Oh,
203
00:11:16,440 --> 00:11:17,700
no wonder you've retired.
204
00:11:17,701 --> 00:11:21,139
Oh, you mustn't blame the inspector. He
and his men worked very hard indeed. I
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00:11:21,140 --> 00:11:22,159
can tell you that.
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00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:26,260
In fact, they glanced at me once or
twice. I was my aunt's sole heir, you
207
00:11:26,560 --> 00:11:28,610
Ah, now, my boy, that was purely
routine.
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00:11:28,740 --> 00:11:32,260
One must pursue every possible angle,
you know. That's part of the job.
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00:11:32,700 --> 00:11:34,000
Of course, I understand.
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00:11:34,001 --> 00:11:38,069
Go. I don't have to concern myself with
that sort of thing any longer.
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00:11:38,070 --> 00:11:40,349
Though, of course, I still have an
interest in this case.
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00:11:40,350 --> 00:11:44,470
By the way, what does a retired Scotland
Yard inspector do when he retires?
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00:11:45,010 --> 00:11:46,810
If I tell you, you'll get a good laugh.
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00:11:47,190 --> 00:11:48,570
Now you'll have to tell us.
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00:11:48,830 --> 00:11:53,330
Well, as a matter of fact, I've grown
quite interested in bird watching.
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00:11:53,650 --> 00:11:54,700
Not really.
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00:11:55,390 --> 00:11:58,040
Yes, I have a small place in the country
now, you know.
218
00:11:58,041 --> 00:12:02,089
A neighbor of mine, a widow, first
introduced me. Oh, now I understand bird
219
00:12:02,090 --> 00:12:05,489
watching, he calls it. No, no, no, no,
actually you don't understand. You see,
220
00:12:05,490 --> 00:12:06,930
it is not as easy as it appears.
221
00:12:07,370 --> 00:12:10,860
You'd be surprised at the number of
people who become intrigued by it.
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00:12:17,030 --> 00:12:20,170
So, a great many worthwhile qualities
are called into play.
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00:12:20,890 --> 00:12:24,769
Planning based on knowledge and
experience, a considerable amount of
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00:12:24,770 --> 00:12:28,560
stealth. And the most acute observation
and attention to detail, of course.
225
00:12:30,030 --> 00:12:33,530
Tell me, have you ever heard what... No,
226
00:12:34,450 --> 00:12:41,109
as a matter of fact, I haven't. However,
I... Is
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00:12:41,110 --> 00:12:42,170
that your dog?
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00:12:44,090 --> 00:12:45,570
Dog? What dog?
229
00:12:46,450 --> 00:12:48,190
Didn't you hear one bark just then?
230
00:12:49,450 --> 00:12:50,500
Why, no.
231
00:12:50,510 --> 00:12:51,650
I didn't hear anything.
232
00:12:56,170 --> 00:12:57,250
I must have been wrong.
233
00:13:00,030 --> 00:13:04,449
But I'm afraid I could never work up any
enthusiasm for such a strenuous pastime
234
00:13:04,450 --> 00:13:06,770
as you've just... Hello, what's the
matter?
235
00:13:07,390 --> 00:13:08,790
Oh, just the gas pressure.
236
00:13:09,130 --> 00:13:11,670
It drops off this way now and again for
some reason.
237
00:13:11,671 --> 00:13:13,969
Something wrong with the gas works, no
doubt.
238
00:13:13,970 --> 00:13:17,849
I suppose we're lucky it never goes
quite out. Oh, the advances of modern
239
00:13:17,850 --> 00:13:21,749
civilization. I sometimes believe we'd
be better off without these modern
240
00:13:21,750 --> 00:13:25,690
conveniences. The gas seems to be down
again, sir. Shall I bring more candles?
241
00:13:26,060 --> 00:13:28,520
Oh, no, I think not, thank you. It's
rather cozy.
242
00:13:28,521 --> 00:13:29,959
Very good.
243
00:13:29,960 --> 00:13:32,620
But you might go and see what that is,
will you? Yes.
244
00:13:52,520 --> 00:13:54,660
The front door had blown open, sir.
245
00:13:56,640 --> 00:14:00,679
Really, I can't see why I spend this
time of the year in England. I'd be
246
00:14:00,680 --> 00:14:03,570
off to pack up and go to Italy and let
them get on without me.
247
00:14:03,720 --> 00:14:05,400
Come now, what about your public?
248
00:14:05,520 --> 00:14:09,860
Oh, my public is a conglomeration of
self -appointed Shakespearean
249
00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:13,940
half -witted intellectuals and just
plain dopes.
250
00:14:14,200 --> 00:14:17,000
And, of course, I'd absolutely die
without them.
251
00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:19,020
Yes, yes, I dare say.
252
00:14:20,140 --> 00:14:24,880
By the way, do you think the calibre of
your public reflects the player, or...?
253
00:14:25,680 --> 00:14:28,300
Or would you say it's just the nature of
the brute?
254
00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:33,360
Well, that's an underhanded question,
Inspector, and I shan't answer it.
255
00:14:37,400 --> 00:14:41,900
You don't play Shakespearean roles
exclusively, do you? Oh, no, indeed.
256
00:14:41,901 --> 00:14:45,479
Though I must say there's been little
else worth doing recently.
257
00:14:45,480 --> 00:14:49,659
I don't see why the writers of today
can't do better. You'd be simply
258
00:14:49,660 --> 00:14:52,370
if you could read some of the things
I've been offered.
259
00:14:54,430 --> 00:14:59,189
You've had a long experience in the
theater, haven't you, Mr. Towne? Well,
260
00:14:59,190 --> 00:15:00,650
done most things, I suppose.
261
00:15:01,110 --> 00:15:02,250
Toured the provinces.
262
00:15:02,530 --> 00:15:04,330
I've been on the halls, too, for a bit.
263
00:15:04,370 --> 00:15:06,050
That was many years ago, of course.
264
00:15:07,750 --> 00:15:10,729
Is it... Would you call it a...
265
00:15:10,730 --> 00:15:16,810
rewarding life?
266
00:15:17,950 --> 00:15:19,250
Rewarding? Oh, yes.
267
00:15:19,251 --> 00:15:23,509
The vicious barbs of critics whose
opinions reflect the state of their
268
00:15:23,510 --> 00:15:26,220
rather than an intelligent appreciation
of the play.
269
00:15:26,530 --> 00:15:31,869
The irrational antics of leading ladies,
such as the incident which occurred
270
00:15:31,870 --> 00:15:33,670
when we were in rehearsal for Hamlet.
271
00:15:33,710 --> 00:15:38,829
The actress playing Ophelia, whom we
need not name, I think, refused to start
272
00:15:38,830 --> 00:15:43,489
rehearsal on Thursday because her
astrologer informed her that it clashed
273
00:15:43,490 --> 00:15:44,169
her sign.
274
00:15:44,170 --> 00:15:49,030
She was quite adamant about it. So we
had to wait until the following Monday.
275
00:15:49,560 --> 00:15:53,180
And she really wasn't worth all the
trouble. She was far too old for the
276
00:15:53,480 --> 00:15:58,560
Then there's one's exploitation by
ungrateful managers, the malicious
277
00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:00,120
lunatic adulations.
278
00:16:01,440 --> 00:16:03,460
Indeed, the rewards are many.
279
00:16:04,340 --> 00:16:09,080
And, of course, nothing else could ever
take its place.
280
00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:13,580
What about those first nights when the
audience stands and cheers you?
281
00:16:13,581 --> 00:16:17,059
When they won't let you go at all,
they'll keep you coming back for one
282
00:16:17,060 --> 00:16:18,110
call after another.
283
00:16:18,380 --> 00:16:21,360
Ah, yes, that's what makes it rewarding,
of course.
284
00:16:21,740 --> 00:16:28,340
There's no price too high to pay for
just a... I say, is something the
285
00:16:31,020 --> 00:16:32,070
No.
286
00:16:32,660 --> 00:16:33,919
Nothing, only...
287
00:16:33,920 --> 00:16:40,819
Now, what is it, my
288
00:16:40,820 --> 00:16:41,870
boy?
289
00:16:48,360 --> 00:16:49,410
see it.
290
00:16:51,300 --> 00:16:52,350
See what?
291
00:16:56,980 --> 00:17:03,300
Are you feeling all right, old chap?
292
00:17:04,619 --> 00:17:05,859
I say, what is it?
293
00:17:10,700 --> 00:17:11,900
I'm all right, thank you.
294
00:17:20,750 --> 00:17:21,800
Can't you see her?
295
00:17:29,850 --> 00:17:31,230
What's the matter with you?
296
00:17:31,231 --> 00:17:34,149
Can't you see her when she's right in
front of your eyes?
297
00:17:34,150 --> 00:17:35,200
Go away!
298
00:17:35,230 --> 00:17:36,280
Get out!
299
00:17:36,770 --> 00:17:37,820
Get out of here!
300
00:17:38,510 --> 00:17:41,160
You can't threaten me, I'm not having
it, so go away!
301
00:17:41,970 --> 00:17:43,610
Get out of here, do you hear me?
302
00:17:44,470 --> 00:17:46,940
Get out, whoever you are, or I'll kill
you again!
303
00:18:10,700 --> 00:18:12,140
So it wasn't a ghost after all.
304
00:18:16,140 --> 00:18:18,320
All right, Inspector, your trick worked.
305
00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:21,320
You may come in, Sergeant Boulder.
306
00:18:26,020 --> 00:18:30,219
Mr. Bedford, it's my duty to arrest you
and charge you with the murder of Miss
307
00:18:30,220 --> 00:18:31,270
Eleanor Ferguson.
308
00:18:32,020 --> 00:18:36,639
I must also caution you that anything
you say may be written down and may be
309
00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:37,690
used in evidence.
310
00:18:38,100 --> 00:18:39,600
You'll have to come along, sir.
311
00:18:48,330 --> 00:18:49,380
Here you are, Bethan.
312
00:19:01,590 --> 00:19:03,110
Very nice resort.
313
00:19:03,450 --> 00:19:04,950
I'm sorry, I was delayed.
314
00:19:06,530 --> 00:19:07,580
What do you mean?
315
00:19:08,110 --> 00:19:09,750
I'd only just a second arrived.
316
00:19:10,390 --> 00:19:11,570
Am I too late?
317
00:19:45,870 --> 00:19:47,030
Good evening again.
318
00:19:47,630 --> 00:19:53,649
Following that little presentation, I'm
prepared to continue our safari through
319
00:19:53,650 --> 00:19:55,010
the jungles of Hollywood.
320
00:19:55,430 --> 00:20:00,530
As you can see, I'm ready to hunt for
the really big game.
321
00:20:00,730 --> 00:20:03,230
So I've hired a native guide.
322
00:20:06,090 --> 00:20:10,670
He claims to know exactly where the big
ones are to be found.
323
00:20:12,910 --> 00:20:18,249
In order to flush the game from its
hiding place, we use a pack of fierce
324
00:20:18,250 --> 00:20:19,730
autograph hounds.
325
00:20:20,310 --> 00:20:26,669
Just yesterday, they treed a big boar,
and before they could be stopped, they
326
00:20:26,670 --> 00:20:28,850
had torn his dinner jacket to bits.
327
00:20:29,290 --> 00:20:35,189
Now, as an example of the flora and
fauna of this area, we present a motion
328
00:20:35,190 --> 00:20:39,250
picture. This picture was shot under
incredible conditions.
329
00:20:39,770 --> 00:20:45,549
We were in constant danger of the heat,
native attacks and temperamental
330
00:20:45,550 --> 00:20:51,989
outbursts. Five years in the
preparation, a year in shooting, all
331
00:20:51,990 --> 00:20:55,170
distilled into one precious minute.
332
00:20:55,450 --> 00:20:59,150
But I see it's time for me to keep an
important appointment.
333
00:20:59,690 --> 00:21:02,370
I shall rejoin you following this.
334
00:21:02,570 --> 00:21:04,470
It will only take a minute.
335
00:21:05,770 --> 00:21:07,890
His time is valuable.
336
00:21:28,750 --> 00:21:32,930
I'm afraid I must press on until next
week at this same time.
337
00:21:33,490 --> 00:21:36,110
My native bearers are getting restless.
338
00:21:36,370 --> 00:21:38,970
That last commercial frightened them.
339
00:21:39,850 --> 00:21:42,070
Coenga, Macambo.
340
00:21:42,120 --> 00:21:46,670
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