All language subtitles for Tim Travers and the Time Travelers Paradox 2024.eng

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional) Download
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,969 --> 00:00:03,838 (ominous music) 2 00:00:09,811 --> 00:00:13,515 (ominous music continues) 3 00:00:18,653 --> 00:00:22,356 (ominous music continues) 4 00:00:24,692 --> 00:00:28,395 (gate clinks and squeaks) 5 00:00:33,535 --> 00:00:37,237 (ominous music continues) 6 00:00:42,209 --> 00:00:45,914 (ominous music continues) 7 00:00:51,118 --> 00:00:54,822 (ominous music continues) 8 00:00:59,761 --> 00:01:02,030 (electricity crackling) (ominous music continues) 9 00:01:02,162 --> 00:01:04,197 - [Tim] Ow, ow, ow! Fuck! 10 00:01:04,331 --> 00:01:05,867 (Tim grunts) 11 00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:08,201 (electricity crackling) (ominous music intensifies) 12 00:01:08,335 --> 00:01:10,470 Oh, fuck! God damn it! 13 00:01:10,605 --> 00:01:12,406 Why is that so hot? 14 00:01:16,010 --> 00:01:19,747 (intense music continues) 15 00:01:22,817 --> 00:01:25,319 (Tim exhales deeply) 16 00:01:25,452 --> 00:01:28,656 (suspenseful music) 17 00:01:34,261 --> 00:01:38,332 (suspenseful music continues) 18 00:01:42,704 --> 00:01:45,540 (switch clicks) 19 00:01:51,478 --> 00:01:55,550 (suspenseful music continues) 20 00:01:58,820 --> 00:02:00,054 (switches clicking) 21 00:02:00,187 --> 00:02:03,791 (electricity crackling) 22 00:02:07,494 --> 00:02:12,800 (switch clicks) (electricity buzzing) 23 00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:15,503 (switch clicks) 24 00:02:15,637 --> 00:02:19,272 (machine parts slamming) 25 00:02:22,376 --> 00:02:25,145 (lever clunks) 26 00:02:26,446 --> 00:02:29,984 (electricity crackling) 27 00:02:32,120 --> 00:02:35,056 (lever rattling) 28 00:02:37,091 --> 00:02:42,496 (machine hisses and creaks) (suspenseful music continues) 29 00:02:43,698 --> 00:02:46,834 (machine creaks and rattles) 30 00:02:46,968 --> 00:02:49,637 (light dings) 31 00:02:52,674 --> 00:02:54,374 (Tim chuckles) 32 00:02:54,509 --> 00:02:56,110 - It's okay. Just, uh... 33 00:02:56,243 --> 00:02:59,312 Thanks, I'm just looking for, uh, looking for an affidavit. 34 00:02:59,446 --> 00:03:01,582 You may have noticed in the news, 35 00:03:01,716 --> 00:03:05,218 I am part of a pretty rough divorce, and it is, uh... 36 00:03:06,020 --> 00:03:08,589 It's a real motherfucker, so uh, I am not- 37 00:03:08,723 --> 00:03:10,457 - Going live in 10. - (sighs) Fuck. 38 00:03:10,591 --> 00:03:12,459 We gotta get going, so... 39 00:03:12,593 --> 00:03:13,928 By the way, she's, uh, she's a witch. 40 00:03:14,062 --> 00:03:16,196 I don't know if you believe in witches, 41 00:03:16,329 --> 00:03:17,965 but I think she's got a cauldron and everything. 42 00:03:18,099 --> 00:03:20,300 Welcome, questioners, truth seekers, 43 00:03:20,434 --> 00:03:23,403 and good ol' fashioned angry Americans. 44 00:03:23,538 --> 00:03:24,972 Welcome to "The Rant"! 45 00:03:25,106 --> 00:03:28,843 I'm James Bunratty, and this is "Bunratty's Rants". 46 00:03:28,976 --> 00:03:31,679 Now, I don't need to tell you folks 47 00:03:31,813 --> 00:03:34,849 what's wrong with the broken scientific establishment. 48 00:03:34,982 --> 00:03:36,283 Of course, the people that bought it, 49 00:03:36,416 --> 00:03:37,350 I'm sure they think it's working great, 50 00:03:37,484 --> 00:03:39,286 but it is not for us. 51 00:03:39,419 --> 00:03:41,055 It is not for real Americans. 52 00:03:41,189 --> 00:03:43,124 That's why I think you're gonna love today's guest. 53 00:03:43,256 --> 00:03:45,593 He is an alternative science guy. 54 00:03:45,727 --> 00:03:47,795 He knows how to think outside the paradigm. 55 00:03:47,929 --> 00:03:50,765 He has witnessed the corruption firsthand, 56 00:03:50,898 --> 00:03:53,735 and I think that you are going to be shocked today, 57 00:03:53,868 --> 00:03:54,802 truth seekers, that's right. 58 00:03:54,936 --> 00:03:56,838 Well, anyway, what I'm saying is 59 00:03:56,971 --> 00:03:58,940 what you're going to probably say is pretty shocking 60 00:03:59,073 --> 00:04:01,308 to a lot of people that don't listen to the show. 61 00:04:01,441 --> 00:04:03,845 And to those newbies, I just wanna say, 62 00:04:03,978 --> 00:04:05,445 welcome to "The Rant". 63 00:04:07,115 --> 00:04:10,685 (patriotic music) (crowd cheering) 64 00:04:10,818 --> 00:04:12,120 Let's get right into it. 65 00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:15,156 Dr. Tim Travers, I am fascinated by your work. 66 00:04:15,288 --> 00:04:20,027 Tell us exactly what the Time Travelers Paradox is. 67 00:04:23,598 --> 00:04:24,599 Dr. Travers? 68 00:04:25,833 --> 00:04:28,836 - Oh, (clears throat) right. - Welcome to the show. 69 00:04:28,970 --> 00:04:31,404 - A few corrections there. Uh, one, I'm not a doctor. 70 00:04:31,539 --> 00:04:33,508 And two, while I'm not mainstream, 71 00:04:33,641 --> 00:04:35,810 I am definitely not an "alternative" scientist. 72 00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:37,178 - The difference being? 73 00:04:37,310 --> 00:04:39,013 - One is for bored housewives with crystals 74 00:04:39,147 --> 00:04:40,280 and closet racists. 75 00:04:40,413 --> 00:04:42,784 (James laughs) 76 00:04:42,917 --> 00:04:45,820 - Oh, we got a show today! Do we not, out there? 77 00:04:45,953 --> 00:04:47,889 That's right. Yeah, we can have some fun here. 78 00:04:48,022 --> 00:04:49,289 That was a good one. 79 00:04:49,422 --> 00:04:52,325 But my audience knows who the man of truth is. 80 00:04:52,459 --> 00:04:53,594 And who is that? 81 00:04:56,697 --> 00:04:58,132 - Bunratty, Bunratty! (group cheering) 82 00:04:58,266 --> 00:04:59,133 - James Bunratty. 83 00:04:59,267 --> 00:05:00,835 Now, besides, fast talker, 84 00:05:00,968 --> 00:05:02,637 how would you know the difference? 85 00:05:02,770 --> 00:05:04,371 You just said yourself that you weren't a real doctor. 86 00:05:04,505 --> 00:05:06,707 - I was kicked out of school for behavioral reasons, 87 00:05:06,841 --> 00:05:08,176 but my grades were excellent. 88 00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:10,545 - Yeah. Establishment elites, am I right? 89 00:05:10,678 --> 00:05:13,247 I mean, who decided that they were the purveyors of truth? 90 00:05:13,380 --> 00:05:14,615 - Education? 91 00:05:14,749 --> 00:05:16,349 Peer review? Uh... 92 00:05:17,585 --> 00:05:18,519 Hygiene? 93 00:05:20,588 --> 00:05:21,522 - Okay. 94 00:05:22,389 --> 00:05:25,126 You're arguing that time travel is possible, 95 00:05:25,259 --> 00:05:27,695 which is, even for this show, quite out there. 96 00:05:27,829 --> 00:05:30,531 So, why don't you just, uh, hold your roll, pal? 97 00:05:30,665 --> 00:05:34,001 - Well, I am sitting in a radio station in the year 2026, 98 00:05:34,135 --> 00:05:35,803 so I think that it might be possible. 99 00:05:35,937 --> 00:05:37,404 Is that, is that a reel-to-reel? 100 00:05:37,538 --> 00:05:38,973 - Yes! 101 00:05:39,106 --> 00:05:41,876 That's a reel-to-reel given to me by Carl Sagan's assistant! 102 00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:43,311 I married her too, all right? 103 00:05:43,443 --> 00:05:45,313 Yeah, so I didn't invite you on this show 104 00:05:45,445 --> 00:05:47,480 to insult my audience, or me, or my team. 105 00:05:47,615 --> 00:05:49,884 - No, you invited me because Mothman was busy 106 00:05:50,017 --> 00:05:51,219 and I was bored. 107 00:05:52,787 --> 00:05:55,289 - The Time Travelers Paradox. 108 00:05:55,422 --> 00:05:56,924 Tell us about it. 109 00:05:57,058 --> 00:05:58,092 - Hm. 110 00:05:58,226 --> 00:06:00,161 It's a thought experiment. 111 00:06:00,294 --> 00:06:02,129 How much do you need me to dumb this down? 112 00:06:02,263 --> 00:06:03,396 - Just a little bit. 113 00:06:03,531 --> 00:06:04,765 - Agree to disagree. 114 00:06:04,899 --> 00:06:07,501 First, a scientist makes a time machine. 115 00:06:07,635 --> 00:06:08,970 (ominous music) 116 00:06:09,103 --> 00:06:11,305 That loops back exactly one minute into the past. 117 00:06:11,438 --> 00:06:12,807 - Oh, is that all? 118 00:06:12,940 --> 00:06:15,509 - Then the scientist kills his younger self. 119 00:06:15,643 --> 00:06:16,878 - As he does. 120 00:06:17,011 --> 00:06:20,748 (ominous music continues) 121 00:06:25,953 --> 00:06:29,657 (ominous music continues) 122 00:06:30,825 --> 00:06:32,960 - Oh! 123 00:06:33,094 --> 00:06:34,896 Yeah! 124 00:06:35,029 --> 00:06:38,431 (Tim exhales sharply) 125 00:06:39,267 --> 00:06:40,201 (gun cocks) 126 00:06:40,334 --> 00:06:41,969 (Tim sighs) 127 00:06:42,103 --> 00:06:45,806 (ominous music continues) 128 00:06:49,210 --> 00:06:50,611 (gun fires) 129 00:06:50,745 --> 00:06:54,248 Now you have a man who should not and cannot exist. 130 00:06:54,382 --> 00:06:56,684 Yet, somehow does. 131 00:06:59,287 --> 00:07:01,122 (blood dripping) 132 00:07:01,255 --> 00:07:03,758 (Tim sighs) 133 00:07:03,891 --> 00:07:06,193 That is the paradox. 134 00:07:07,427 --> 00:07:08,863 Paradoxes are impossible. 135 00:07:08,996 --> 00:07:10,298 - Man, you are very smart, 136 00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:12,667 but I would hate to go to dinner with you. 137 00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:15,770 If you're just joining us, we have not-doctor Tim Travers. 138 00:07:15,903 --> 00:07:17,204 And while you're at it, 139 00:07:17,338 --> 00:07:19,941 pick up some of Bunratty's Blast Vitamins. 140 00:07:20,074 --> 00:07:22,843 And while we're there, we have our own version of HGH. 141 00:07:22,977 --> 00:07:25,146 It's not the dangerous kind that Sylvester Stallone uses. 142 00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:28,382 No, it is Bunratty's HGA. 143 00:07:28,516 --> 00:07:29,717 That's right, HGA. We'll be right back. 144 00:07:29,850 --> 00:07:30,851 Great job, man. 145 00:07:31,585 --> 00:07:34,088 (bright electronic music) 146 00:07:34,221 --> 00:07:38,826 (gun fires rapidly) (bullet casings clattering) 147 00:07:38,960 --> 00:07:40,861 - Well, shit. 148 00:07:40,995 --> 00:07:44,464 (dramatic synth music) 149 00:07:49,403 --> 00:07:53,007 (Tim clearing throat) 150 00:07:53,140 --> 00:07:54,542 (Tim blows into recorder) 151 00:07:54,675 --> 00:07:55,643 Um... 152 00:07:57,445 --> 00:07:59,380 Observation one. Uh... 153 00:07:59,513 --> 00:08:01,182 Light, or at least the perception of light, 154 00:08:01,315 --> 00:08:04,018 can only move one way through the machine. 155 00:08:04,151 --> 00:08:07,054 I can see into the past, but can't see into the future. 156 00:08:07,188 --> 00:08:10,624 That makes sense, intuitively. Um... 157 00:08:10,758 --> 00:08:11,959 Observation two. 158 00:08:12,093 --> 00:08:13,060 The fuck! 159 00:08:15,129 --> 00:08:17,365 (Tim chuckles) 160 00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:20,701 I have, um, murdered my younger self, 161 00:08:20,835 --> 00:08:23,137 and, and causality appears to be unaffected, 162 00:08:23,270 --> 00:08:28,175 like, like completely unaffected, which makes no sense. 163 00:08:28,309 --> 00:08:30,878 I refer you to my aforementioned, "The fuck!" 164 00:08:34,582 --> 00:08:37,718 Theory one. Um... (bell chimes) 165 00:08:37,852 --> 00:08:41,055 Time travel has, has not taken place at all. 166 00:08:41,188 --> 00:08:42,857 Instead, I have been 167 00:08:44,058 --> 00:08:47,762 transported to a identical universe. 168 00:08:47,895 --> 00:08:49,597 (bell chimes) 169 00:08:49,730 --> 00:08:52,166 Problematic theory. Um... (chuckles) 170 00:08:52,299 --> 00:08:55,236 Since that the machine might work as a fancy teleporter, 171 00:08:55,369 --> 00:08:56,904 sending me to a, by wild coincidence, 172 00:08:57,038 --> 00:08:58,739 place that just so happens to be indistinguishable 173 00:08:58,873 --> 00:09:02,243 from my own past, seems unlikely. 174 00:09:03,010 --> 00:09:05,846 (stamp thuds) 175 00:09:05,980 --> 00:09:06,947 Hmm. 176 00:09:08,015 --> 00:09:10,651 Theory two. (bell chimes) 177 00:09:10,785 --> 00:09:13,054 (Tim sighs) 178 00:09:13,187 --> 00:09:16,023 I have time traveled in the conventional sense. 179 00:09:16,157 --> 00:09:20,694 Please excuse my abuse of the word "conventional". 180 00:09:22,496 --> 00:09:24,698 Um... (sighs) 181 00:09:24,832 --> 00:09:27,034 Time is a dimension in its own right. 182 00:09:27,168 --> 00:09:28,669 (bell chimes) 183 00:09:28,803 --> 00:09:30,771 Therefore, causality must be limited by the speed of light, 184 00:09:30,905 --> 00:09:35,876 which prevents the paradox from ever catching up. 185 00:09:36,010 --> 00:09:38,813 (bell chimes) 186 00:09:38,946 --> 00:09:40,381 (Tim chuckles) 187 00:09:40,515 --> 00:09:42,383 How the hell am I even supposed to test that? 188 00:09:42,517 --> 00:09:44,553 (stamp thuds) 189 00:09:44,718 --> 00:09:47,121 (Tim sighs) 190 00:09:47,822 --> 00:09:51,759 Theory three. Um... (bell chimes) 191 00:09:51,892 --> 00:09:54,495 (Tim breathes deeply) 192 00:09:54,628 --> 00:09:57,898 Uh, my presence has spawned a 193 00:09:58,032 --> 00:10:00,334 new universe via my 194 00:10:02,069 --> 00:10:03,337 interaction with it. 195 00:10:03,471 --> 00:10:04,405 (bell chimes) 196 00:10:04,539 --> 00:10:05,372 Now, that's... 197 00:10:05,507 --> 00:10:06,674 That's an interesting one. 198 00:10:07,641 --> 00:10:10,244 If my interaction is the seed, then, then from my frame, 199 00:10:10,377 --> 00:10:12,379 no other traveler could impact my timeline. 200 00:10:12,514 --> 00:10:14,915 But, but, but the traveler could continually 201 00:10:15,049 --> 00:10:16,183 impact other timelines. 202 00:10:16,317 --> 00:10:18,486 Now, that, that's testable! 203 00:10:18,652 --> 00:10:19,920 I just, I just need to have a... 204 00:10:20,054 --> 00:10:22,623 I just, I just need to repeat the experiment! 205 00:10:22,756 --> 00:10:24,758 (gun fires) (blood splatters) 206 00:10:24,892 --> 00:10:26,494 (body thumps) (footsteps clacking) 207 00:10:26,627 --> 00:10:27,562 (Tim chuckles) 208 00:10:27,695 --> 00:10:29,130 - Now we're getting somewhere! 209 00:10:29,263 --> 00:10:31,499 As theorized, my own timeline remains unaffected! 210 00:10:31,632 --> 00:10:34,068 (phone vibrates and chirps) (Tim gasps) 211 00:10:34,201 --> 00:10:39,541 (phone vibrates and chirps) Oh. (chuckles) 212 00:10:42,209 --> 00:10:45,913 Oh, crap. Forgot about that. 213 00:10:46,046 --> 00:10:47,815 Now there's a thought. - Now we're getting somewhere! 214 00:10:47,948 --> 00:10:50,317 As theorized, my own timeline remains unaffected! 215 00:10:50,451 --> 00:10:52,186 (gun fires) (Beta Tim groans) 216 00:10:52,319 --> 00:10:53,287 - Sorry. 217 00:10:54,488 --> 00:10:56,490 - What the hell, man? 218 00:10:56,625 --> 00:10:57,858 - It was an impulse. 219 00:10:57,992 --> 00:11:00,060 I was trying to catch myself by surprise. 220 00:11:00,194 --> 00:11:01,262 - That's moronic! 221 00:11:01,395 --> 00:11:02,531 - Don't be a dick. 222 00:11:03,330 --> 00:11:04,331 (gun clicks) (Beta Tim whimpers) 223 00:11:04,465 --> 00:11:05,499 Right. - Right. 224 00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:08,469 (Beta Tim groans) 225 00:11:08,603 --> 00:11:09,870 Twice! 226 00:11:10,004 --> 00:11:12,973 (Beta Tim pants and moans) (gun clicking) 227 00:11:13,107 --> 00:11:14,275 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! 228 00:11:14,408 --> 00:11:16,210 (gun fires) 229 00:11:16,343 --> 00:11:18,312 (Tim sighs) 230 00:11:18,445 --> 00:11:21,248 (phone vibrates and chirps) 231 00:11:21,382 --> 00:11:24,018 (phone vibrates and chirps) (eerie music) 232 00:11:24,151 --> 00:11:26,954 - Right. (groans) 233 00:11:27,087 --> 00:11:28,055 Eww. 234 00:11:33,127 --> 00:11:34,962 No, no. Date, date! 235 00:11:37,064 --> 00:11:40,301 (moody synth music) 236 00:11:45,906 --> 00:11:48,577 (moody synth music continues) 237 00:11:48,709 --> 00:11:52,313 (electric sign crackling) 238 00:11:52,980 --> 00:11:55,983 (patrons chattering) (lively bar music) 239 00:11:56,116 --> 00:11:58,419 - Hey! Excuse you, fucko! 240 00:11:58,553 --> 00:11:59,954 Yeah, 20 minutes late. 241 00:12:00,087 --> 00:12:02,823 Bet ya five bucks he doesn't even show up. 242 00:12:02,957 --> 00:12:03,924 Nah, ah, ah, ah. 243 00:12:04,058 --> 00:12:05,125 That's mine. That's yours. 244 00:12:06,695 --> 00:12:08,796 - Wow. Are you, uh... 245 00:12:08,929 --> 00:12:11,131 Are you like this all the time? 246 00:12:11,265 --> 00:12:12,166 - Yep. 247 00:12:12,299 --> 00:12:13,400 - Kinda like it. (chuckles) 248 00:12:13,535 --> 00:12:15,336 - That's real. - Dr. Travers? 249 00:12:15,469 --> 00:12:16,837 - Still not a doctor. - Yeah, whatever. 250 00:12:16,971 --> 00:12:19,373 Listen. You are belittling James a lot. 251 00:12:19,507 --> 00:12:21,576 He doesn't like it. Hell, he hates it. 252 00:12:21,710 --> 00:12:24,613 So, please, on behalf of the entire production staff- 253 00:12:24,745 --> 00:12:27,582 - [James] Well, he's been dead for like 44 years. 254 00:12:27,716 --> 00:12:29,183 - Keep doing it. 255 00:12:29,316 --> 00:12:30,251 - [James] You ever been in a room with Paul McCartney? 256 00:12:30,384 --> 00:12:31,352 - It is delicious. 257 00:12:31,485 --> 00:12:32,886 - Exactly! (Delilah giggles) 258 00:12:33,020 --> 00:12:34,656 "Defamation"? (sighs) What about free speech? 259 00:12:34,788 --> 00:12:36,023 Well, of course I made it up! 260 00:12:36,156 --> 00:12:37,324 What does that have to do with anything? 261 00:12:37,458 --> 00:12:39,561 - You go, James! We believe in you. 262 00:12:39,694 --> 00:12:41,962 Hm. (chuckles) I eat this shit up. 263 00:12:42,096 --> 00:12:43,764 - So, you're not into the whole- 264 00:12:43,897 --> 00:12:47,268 - Mm, bored housewives with crystals and closet racists? 265 00:12:48,202 --> 00:12:49,504 Nah, no. 266 00:12:49,638 --> 00:12:51,171 I thought this would be a great post-college gig 267 00:12:51,305 --> 00:12:54,375 while I figured out what to do with my life, but, um, 268 00:12:54,509 --> 00:12:57,712 that was 15 years ago, because time is a cruel bitch. 269 00:12:57,845 --> 00:12:58,846 - [James] Yeah, it's on the Moon! 270 00:12:58,979 --> 00:12:59,714 By the moon, I mean my ass. 271 00:12:59,847 --> 00:13:00,914 - I'm Delilah. 272 00:13:01,849 --> 00:13:02,950 I stopped talking. 273 00:13:04,018 --> 00:13:05,754 - What? - Yeah, a while ago. 274 00:13:05,919 --> 00:13:07,254 I'm sorry, is... 275 00:13:07,388 --> 00:13:08,355 Is my life story boring to you, 276 00:13:08,489 --> 00:13:09,624 or are you just incredibly rude? 277 00:13:09,758 --> 00:13:11,358 - Not mutually exclusive. 278 00:13:11,492 --> 00:13:12,627 - Wow! 279 00:13:12,761 --> 00:13:14,295 - Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. 280 00:13:14,428 --> 00:13:15,730 I am distracted, but it's not because you're boring. 281 00:13:15,863 --> 00:13:17,498 You're not, you're not boring. 282 00:13:17,632 --> 00:13:20,502 Um, today was just a weird day. 283 00:13:20,635 --> 00:13:22,303 - How weird was your day? 284 00:13:22,436 --> 00:13:24,773 - Uh, honest answer? 285 00:13:24,905 --> 00:13:26,106 - Yeah. 286 00:13:26,240 --> 00:13:28,809 - Well, today, I activated a time machine 287 00:13:28,942 --> 00:13:31,378 that is powered by nuclear materials 288 00:13:31,513 --> 00:13:35,115 that were stolen from a terrorist organization. 289 00:13:35,249 --> 00:13:36,283 And, uh... 290 00:13:37,084 --> 00:13:39,119 Then I went back in time and killed my younger self 291 00:13:39,253 --> 00:13:43,558 repeatedly, and I have no idea how that's possible. 292 00:13:45,426 --> 00:13:47,394 - I'm sorry. I wasn't listening. 293 00:13:47,529 --> 00:13:48,530 - What? What? - See? 294 00:13:48,663 --> 00:13:50,297 It's rude, and I was listening. 295 00:13:50,431 --> 00:13:53,067 Great bit. (chuckles) 296 00:13:54,001 --> 00:13:55,469 You're not doing a bit. 297 00:13:57,404 --> 00:13:59,473 (Delilah chuckles) 298 00:13:59,607 --> 00:14:01,108 (Delilah laughs) 299 00:14:01,241 --> 00:14:03,077 Okay. All right. 300 00:14:03,210 --> 00:14:04,845 - Yeah, I've got eyes on him. 301 00:14:04,978 --> 00:14:06,581 Doesn't look like much. 302 00:14:07,381 --> 00:14:08,717 Just a waiting game now. 303 00:14:08,849 --> 00:14:10,284 Oh, yes. Hi. 304 00:14:10,417 --> 00:14:12,587 Uh, I'll have a Shirley Temple, easy on the grenadine. 305 00:14:12,721 --> 00:14:14,789 - Sure. - Thank you very much. 306 00:14:14,922 --> 00:14:16,423 - You know, um... 307 00:14:16,558 --> 00:14:18,425 Seeing you make James suffer was fun, 308 00:14:18,560 --> 00:14:20,994 but this whole mad scientist shtick 309 00:14:21,128 --> 00:14:23,497 it's like, it's like performance art. 310 00:14:23,631 --> 00:14:25,999 I'm just waiting for the cameras to pop out. (chuckles) 311 00:14:26,133 --> 00:14:27,067 - I avoid cameras. 312 00:14:27,201 --> 00:14:28,268 - Are your friends in on this? 313 00:14:28,402 --> 00:14:29,504 - I don't have friends. 314 00:14:29,637 --> 00:14:31,372 - Oh, gross. Not even as a kid? 315 00:14:33,107 --> 00:14:35,909 (upbeat rock music) (child whimpering) 316 00:14:36,043 --> 00:14:37,277 (door clicks open) 317 00:14:37,411 --> 00:14:39,681 - Timothy Oliphant Travers! 318 00:14:39,814 --> 00:14:41,616 Are those real? - No, Mom! 319 00:14:41,750 --> 00:14:44,819 I'm just using the electric potato. 320 00:14:44,952 --> 00:14:46,387 - All right. 321 00:14:46,521 --> 00:14:47,655 I do not want a repeat of the Guinea pig incident! 322 00:14:47,789 --> 00:14:49,490 Only shock the potato. 323 00:14:49,624 --> 00:14:51,125 - Yes, Mother. 324 00:14:51,860 --> 00:14:54,061 (child whimpering) 325 00:14:54,194 --> 00:14:55,630 (upbeat rock music continues) 326 00:14:55,764 --> 00:14:59,433 (child screaming) (light bulb buzzing) 327 00:14:59,567 --> 00:15:01,870 - Oh, I'm gonna have to dig another hole. 328 00:15:02,002 --> 00:15:06,240 - Went through a lot of friends, but that's fine. 329 00:15:06,907 --> 00:15:09,644 Learning how to be by yourself is a reward of its own. 330 00:15:09,778 --> 00:15:10,978 - You know, to a point, but, 331 00:15:11,111 --> 00:15:12,547 it's hard to take that armor off. 332 00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:15,650 - Some people don't have the choice, so... 333 00:15:15,784 --> 00:15:19,186 It's also fine, because I don't need other people. 334 00:15:19,319 --> 00:15:20,220 - Hm! 335 00:15:20,354 --> 00:15:21,723 That's a thing that people say, 336 00:15:21,856 --> 00:15:23,525 when they think they're better and smarter. 337 00:15:23,658 --> 00:15:25,727 - I didn't mean it like that, but I am better and smarter. 338 00:15:25,860 --> 00:15:31,231 Look. I don't share other people's values in the abstract. 339 00:15:31,733 --> 00:15:33,300 Take time travel. 340 00:15:33,434 --> 00:15:36,270 A paradox will literally break reality, 341 00:15:36,403 --> 00:15:38,172 and a reality broken can be rewritten. 342 00:15:38,305 --> 00:15:41,041 - Ominous, but yeah, I get it. 343 00:15:41,175 --> 00:15:44,011 You hate that people wanna use it for time tourism. 344 00:15:44,144 --> 00:15:47,314 Oh, kinda like when a lady discovers she has superpowers, 345 00:15:47,448 --> 00:15:49,784 and it's like, "Oh, no, but what, what does this mean 346 00:15:49,918 --> 00:15:51,251 for my job and relationship?" 347 00:15:51,385 --> 00:15:53,721 And I'm like, "Bitch, you've got superpowers!" 348 00:15:53,855 --> 00:15:55,422 Yeah! Like, laser your boss to death! 349 00:15:55,557 --> 00:15:57,926 Throw your loser boyfriend into the sun and, and, 350 00:15:58,058 --> 00:16:00,728 and go conquer the world, like a sane person. 351 00:16:00,862 --> 00:16:02,697 - Exactly. Thank you. (Delilah chuckles) 352 00:16:02,831 --> 00:16:03,932 - Crush the peasants. 353 00:16:04,064 --> 00:16:05,633 - It's misplaced priorities. 354 00:16:05,767 --> 00:16:08,335 It's like, you know, working on a, on a, on a work project 355 00:16:08,469 --> 00:16:10,672 when someone is actively trying to kill you. 356 00:16:10,805 --> 00:16:12,239 - Right, right, or going on a date, 357 00:16:12,372 --> 00:16:13,741 when you're about to conquer the world. 358 00:16:13,875 --> 00:16:16,276 - (chuckles) Right. - What're you doing? 359 00:16:16,410 --> 00:16:17,411 But what? 360 00:16:19,213 --> 00:16:22,216 - You are absolutely right. 361 00:16:22,349 --> 00:16:24,953 - Did, did I say that? I, I don't think I said that. 362 00:16:25,085 --> 00:16:26,688 I said something about crushing peasants, 363 00:16:26,821 --> 00:16:27,755 but that was more for me. 364 00:16:27,889 --> 00:16:29,289 - I need to get back to the lab. 365 00:16:29,423 --> 00:16:30,692 - What? Right, right now? 366 00:16:30,825 --> 00:16:31,759 - Yeah. 367 00:16:32,827 --> 00:16:34,394 - You may not know this, but a woman driving 368 00:16:34,529 --> 00:16:37,030 halfway across the city in the middle of murderville 369 00:16:37,164 --> 00:16:39,399 is kind of a, it's kind of a leap of faith. 370 00:16:39,534 --> 00:16:41,268 That's not lost on you? 371 00:16:42,302 --> 00:16:43,905 - It is not. - So... 372 00:16:44,973 --> 00:16:47,842 You're, you're, you're joking, right? (chuckles) 373 00:16:47,976 --> 00:16:49,343 You're trolling me for a goof, 374 00:16:49,476 --> 00:16:51,011 because you're an ass like that. 375 00:16:51,144 --> 00:16:52,881 - I am, but I am not. 376 00:16:54,448 --> 00:16:56,350 - Well, I don't have to be polite anymore 377 00:16:56,483 --> 00:16:58,051 because you're the one who's standing me up. 378 00:16:58,185 --> 00:17:01,455 So, figure out where you are on the spectrum, dick weed, 379 00:17:01,589 --> 00:17:03,357 and then go fuck yourself! 380 00:17:04,491 --> 00:17:05,560 Fuck off. 381 00:17:05,693 --> 00:17:06,861 Bye! 382 00:17:06,995 --> 00:17:08,997 Fuck you, and fuck you, and fuck you! 383 00:17:09,129 --> 00:17:10,297 Fuck you guys, too! 384 00:17:10,430 --> 00:17:12,165 Hey, you, with the French braid! You suck! 385 00:17:12,299 --> 00:17:13,033 Fuck off! 386 00:17:13,166 --> 00:17:15,335 This fuckin' bar is shit! 387 00:17:15,469 --> 00:17:17,805 Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! 388 00:17:17,939 --> 00:17:20,140 - Is she pointing to us? - Fuck you! 389 00:17:20,274 --> 00:17:21,743 - [Patron] Oh, my God. 390 00:17:21,876 --> 00:17:23,110 (metal clangs) - Ow! 391 00:17:23,243 --> 00:17:24,177 (door slams) 392 00:17:24,311 --> 00:17:26,748 (fingertips tapping) 393 00:17:26,881 --> 00:17:28,215 - (chuckles) I'm not, um... 394 00:17:28,348 --> 00:17:29,951 I've been checked. 395 00:17:30,083 --> 00:17:31,351 Many times. 396 00:17:31,485 --> 00:17:32,754 (patron coughs) 397 00:17:32,887 --> 00:17:34,154 Um... 398 00:17:34,288 --> 00:17:36,524 At worst, it's a, it's a case of mild psychosis. 399 00:17:36,658 --> 00:17:38,358 Which is unrelated. So, you know what? 400 00:17:38,492 --> 00:17:40,628 I don't need the judgment right now. 401 00:17:40,762 --> 00:17:42,830 And also, honestly, it's kinda fucked up that you would 402 00:17:42,964 --> 00:17:45,667 make fun of somebody for being on the spectrum. 403 00:17:45,800 --> 00:17:47,035 Fuck! Just fuck off! 404 00:17:47,167 --> 00:17:50,270 (footsteps clacking) 405 00:17:50,404 --> 00:17:52,707 - But I didn't say anything. 406 00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:56,410 - [Patron] You also forgot to charge them. 407 00:17:56,544 --> 00:17:59,881 - Crap! 408 00:18:00,014 --> 00:18:03,551 (brooding synth music) 409 00:18:07,087 --> 00:18:07,989 (Tim sighs) 410 00:18:08,121 --> 00:18:09,757 (glass clunks) 411 00:18:09,891 --> 00:18:11,693 - Had to know, you know? 412 00:18:13,327 --> 00:18:14,227 (bottle slams) 413 00:18:14,361 --> 00:18:16,564 Maybe there was something there. 414 00:18:23,136 --> 00:18:25,205 (Tim sighs) 415 00:18:25,339 --> 00:18:26,574 (Tim chuckles) 416 00:18:26,708 --> 00:18:27,842 Why am I telling you? 417 00:18:28,610 --> 00:18:32,747 You're just a localized wormhole, not a person. 418 00:18:34,983 --> 00:18:37,518 (Tim sighs) 419 00:18:38,586 --> 00:18:39,954 I know, I know, I know. 420 00:18:40,088 --> 00:18:42,289 Back to work! (chuckles) 421 00:18:42,422 --> 00:18:43,891 (Tim sighs) 422 00:18:44,025 --> 00:18:45,026 Alone. 423 00:18:48,062 --> 00:18:50,031 (brooding synth music continues) 424 00:18:50,163 --> 00:18:51,899 (Tim sighs) 425 00:18:52,033 --> 00:18:53,034 Boys. 426 00:18:58,338 --> 00:18:59,139 (glass clunks) 427 00:18:59,272 --> 00:19:00,775 First rule of science! 428 00:19:00,908 --> 00:19:02,442 Repeat the experiment. 429 00:19:03,778 --> 00:19:04,979 Verify results. 430 00:19:07,982 --> 00:19:09,117 This is gonna suck. 431 00:19:10,518 --> 00:19:12,120 (gun fires) 432 00:19:12,252 --> 00:19:14,522 - You did say this was gonna suck. 433 00:19:14,656 --> 00:19:15,523 (gun fires) 434 00:19:15,657 --> 00:19:17,091 - Motherfucker! 435 00:19:17,224 --> 00:19:19,594 Come on! (guns firing) 436 00:19:19,727 --> 00:19:20,662 - Ow! 437 00:19:20,795 --> 00:19:21,929 Why did you... (gun fires) 438 00:19:22,063 --> 00:19:23,064 - Come on, now! (gun fires) 439 00:19:23,196 --> 00:19:24,032 Oh! 440 00:19:24,164 --> 00:19:28,002 (phone vibrates and chirps) 441 00:19:28,136 --> 00:19:29,302 (Tim chuckling) (gun fires) 442 00:19:29,436 --> 00:19:31,238 - Okay, okay. Okay, okay, okay. 443 00:19:31,371 --> 00:19:33,141 Okay, all right. 444 00:19:33,273 --> 00:19:34,642 (sighs) How about this? 445 00:19:34,776 --> 00:19:37,444 Hypothetically, let's say you make it work. 446 00:19:37,578 --> 00:19:39,514 You break the world, for no point, 447 00:19:39,647 --> 00:19:42,282 but to prove that you can do it. 448 00:19:42,416 --> 00:19:43,818 What then? 449 00:19:43,951 --> 00:19:45,153 Is a time machine that goes back one minute useful? 450 00:19:45,285 --> 00:19:46,621 - That, that is a good question. 451 00:19:46,754 --> 00:19:48,589 - Yeah, well, this is all about questions. 452 00:19:48,723 --> 00:19:49,991 - Not good ones. 453 00:19:50,124 --> 00:19:54,261 Results prove... (dark synth music) 454 00:19:55,129 --> 00:19:56,164 Consistent. 455 00:19:57,932 --> 00:19:59,399 (Tim grunts) 456 00:19:59,534 --> 00:20:04,605 30-plus loops and still no perceivable paradox, so... 457 00:20:08,208 --> 00:20:09,409 (Tim groans) 458 00:20:09,544 --> 00:20:10,545 Fuck. 459 00:20:11,445 --> 00:20:13,948 (Tim sighs) 460 00:20:19,153 --> 00:20:20,521 Hold, hold on. 461 00:20:21,622 --> 00:20:24,125 Hold on. - Results prove consistent. 462 00:20:24,926 --> 00:20:30,164 30-plus loops and still no perceivable paradox, so... 463 00:20:30,732 --> 00:20:32,399 (Gamma Tim gasps and yelps) - Yes, hi. 464 00:20:32,533 --> 00:20:34,135 Um, here's where I'm at on this. 465 00:20:34,267 --> 00:20:35,837 We can safely conclude the observer's frame 466 00:20:35,970 --> 00:20:37,171 cannot be impacted. 467 00:20:37,304 --> 00:20:38,573 - You're, you're impacting me right now. 468 00:20:38,706 --> 00:20:39,807 - Don't interrupt. 469 00:20:39,941 --> 00:20:41,609 What we're testing is theory two, 470 00:20:41,743 --> 00:20:43,443 in which case, you didn't exist until about 10 seconds ago, 471 00:20:43,578 --> 00:20:44,746 but now that you do, however, 472 00:20:44,879 --> 00:20:46,914 your frame cannot be impacted again. 473 00:20:47,648 --> 00:20:48,616 - Right. 474 00:20:49,483 --> 00:20:50,618 - So, how do I test that? 475 00:20:51,819 --> 00:20:53,688 - Got it. You kill me. 476 00:20:53,821 --> 00:20:55,123 Um... 477 00:20:55,255 --> 00:21:00,327 - No, no, no, no! Not, not this me. (chuckles) 478 00:21:00,695 --> 00:21:04,431 - [Past Tim] You, however, your frame cannot be impacted. 479 00:21:04,565 --> 00:21:05,867 - That me. 480 00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:07,367 - How do test that? (gun cocks) 481 00:21:07,502 --> 00:21:08,669 - I got it. You kill me. 482 00:21:08,803 --> 00:21:10,705 Not, not this me. 483 00:21:10,838 --> 00:21:11,672 (gun fires) 484 00:21:11,806 --> 00:21:13,875 - Jesus! (body thumps) 485 00:21:14,008 --> 00:21:16,944 - Okay, so that version of me died, 486 00:21:17,078 --> 00:21:19,847 but I didn't, so, that holds. 487 00:21:19,981 --> 00:21:22,216 - I'm sorry, what, what, what holds? 488 00:21:22,349 --> 00:21:25,352 - Oh, he affected my timeline, and I wanted to prove 489 00:21:25,485 --> 00:21:27,255 that he couldn't do it a second time, which of course- 490 00:21:27,387 --> 00:21:29,056 - Supports theory three. I get it. 491 00:21:29,190 --> 00:21:30,691 Don't spoon feed me. 492 00:21:32,026 --> 00:21:33,426 (Tim sighs) 493 00:21:33,561 --> 00:21:35,530 - Does everybody else want a drink? 494 00:21:36,831 --> 00:21:38,298 (upbeat synth music) 495 00:21:38,431 --> 00:21:40,568 Cool, it's cool. 496 00:21:40,701 --> 00:21:41,702 - What the fuck? 497 00:21:46,339 --> 00:21:48,042 - Oh, my head. 498 00:21:48,176 --> 00:21:49,177 Oh! 499 00:21:51,279 --> 00:21:53,181 What's with the, the name tag? 500 00:21:53,313 --> 00:21:55,382 - Trust me, you're all gonna be wanting these soon enough. 501 00:21:55,516 --> 00:21:56,918 All right? 502 00:21:57,051 --> 00:21:59,954 Anyway, we were arguing the merits of theory three. 503 00:22:00,087 --> 00:22:02,355 - Ah, but what if it's theory two, hm? 504 00:22:03,224 --> 00:22:04,659 And it's just the one timeline, 505 00:22:04,792 --> 00:22:07,295 but it's limited by the speed of light. 506 00:22:07,995 --> 00:22:08,996 - Good question. 507 00:22:10,832 --> 00:22:11,999 (pool balls clacking) 508 00:22:12,133 --> 00:22:13,333 - Uh... 509 00:22:13,466 --> 00:22:14,836 I mean, who cares, though? It's, it's... 510 00:22:14,969 --> 00:22:16,704 You can't control for it, so it's pointless. 511 00:22:16,838 --> 00:22:18,039 - We, we can! 512 00:22:18,172 --> 00:22:19,574 We just have to go the other way through! 513 00:22:19,707 --> 00:22:20,675 - What? - What? 514 00:22:20,808 --> 00:22:21,676 - What? 515 00:22:21,809 --> 00:22:23,044 - Just stick with me here. Um... 516 00:22:23,177 --> 00:22:25,412 It's been six hours since, since he- 517 00:22:25,546 --> 00:22:27,281 - Mm-mm, mm-mm. 518 00:22:27,414 --> 00:22:29,617 - You started the first loop, right? 519 00:22:29,750 --> 00:22:31,853 So, the paradox, if it's moving at the speed of light, 520 00:22:31,986 --> 00:22:34,755 happened one minute in your past. 521 00:22:34,889 --> 00:22:36,324 (chuckles) If we go the other way, we could see it! 522 00:22:36,456 --> 00:22:37,725 That's our control! 523 00:22:38,960 --> 00:22:40,828 - You get all that? - Yeah pretty straightforward. 524 00:22:40,962 --> 00:22:42,163 - Mm. - Mm-hm. 525 00:22:42,296 --> 00:22:43,598 - Well, doesn't matter, 526 00:22:43,731 --> 00:22:45,465 'cause the machine doesn't work like that. 527 00:22:45,600 --> 00:22:46,934 - It can! It can! 528 00:22:47,068 --> 00:22:49,270 We just have to figure out how to slow the... 529 00:22:49,402 --> 00:22:50,403 Slow the, the... 530 00:22:51,672 --> 00:22:53,207 Look, I need, I need, I need visual aids. 531 00:22:53,341 --> 00:22:55,442 So, let's just grab some of these, and just do it, 532 00:22:55,576 --> 00:22:58,045 do it, ow, the other way, ow! 533 00:22:58,179 --> 00:23:01,349 - All right, the coast is clear. Come on, pick those up. 534 00:23:01,481 --> 00:23:02,917 - Jesus. - I need a drink! 535 00:23:03,050 --> 00:23:05,186 - Yeah, yep, yep. - It's gonna be fine. 536 00:23:05,319 --> 00:23:06,888 - All right. 537 00:23:07,021 --> 00:23:08,356 - What? 538 00:23:08,488 --> 00:23:09,156 You! 539 00:23:09,290 --> 00:23:10,124 - Which me? 540 00:23:10,258 --> 00:23:11,192 Sorry. Hard to explain. 541 00:23:11,325 --> 00:23:13,094 How are you? 542 00:23:13,227 --> 00:23:14,295 What're you doing back here? 543 00:23:14,427 --> 00:23:16,330 - I forgot my scarf. 544 00:23:16,463 --> 00:23:17,665 What are you doing here? 545 00:23:17,798 --> 00:23:18,666 I thought you had to go back to the lab? 546 00:23:18,799 --> 00:23:19,834 - Wasn't that yesterday? 547 00:23:19,967 --> 00:23:21,602 - No! It was two hours ago. 548 00:23:21,736 --> 00:23:24,005 - Two hours? - Yes! 549 00:23:24,138 --> 00:23:25,472 - Wow. I did way too many loops. 550 00:23:25,606 --> 00:23:28,376 - "Loops"? What is that, some kind of drink? 551 00:23:28,509 --> 00:23:29,277 - Yes? 552 00:23:29,409 --> 00:23:30,378 - Really? 553 00:23:31,212 --> 00:23:32,647 Come buy me one. - Oh, oh, oh, oh. 554 00:23:32,780 --> 00:23:34,649 - [Delilah] You owe me! Come on! 555 00:23:36,651 --> 00:23:38,886 - Hm? Hm? (water splashing) 556 00:23:39,020 --> 00:23:40,621 - Oh, great! There goes the only sober one. 557 00:23:40,755 --> 00:23:44,091 I'm just too, too, too drunk to math right now. 558 00:23:44,225 --> 00:23:47,494 - I know some assholes who aren't. (chuckles) 559 00:23:47,628 --> 00:23:48,863 (moody synth music) 560 00:23:48,996 --> 00:23:50,598 - The machine only loops one minute back! 561 00:23:50,731 --> 00:23:52,366 Why did you think that 21 drunks would be an improvement? 562 00:23:52,499 --> 00:23:54,434 - I said I'm ordering coffee! 563 00:23:56,604 --> 00:23:58,406 24-hour coffee delivery. 564 00:23:58,539 --> 00:23:59,774 - [Delivery Guy] Yeah, it's beautiful out here. 565 00:23:59,907 --> 00:24:01,342 - [Eta Tim] God bless capitalism. 566 00:24:01,474 --> 00:24:02,743 - Yeah, it took me about 20 minutes to get out here. 567 00:24:02,877 --> 00:24:04,011 - Bless it, I said! 568 00:24:05,379 --> 00:24:07,548 (Eta Tim sighs) 569 00:24:07,682 --> 00:24:11,686 (Eta Tim whistling jauntily) 570 00:24:16,424 --> 00:24:20,594 (Eta Tim continues whistling) 571 00:24:20,728 --> 00:24:23,731 (ominous music) 572 00:24:23,864 --> 00:24:25,533 Look. (clears throat) 573 00:24:25,666 --> 00:24:27,335 I don't know who's following me, 574 00:24:27,467 --> 00:24:30,705 but you picked the wrong guy to be doing this... 575 00:24:30,838 --> 00:24:32,472 (gun fires) 576 00:24:32,606 --> 00:24:35,475 (Eta Tim groans) 577 00:24:37,211 --> 00:24:38,913 - That was worth the wait. 578 00:24:39,046 --> 00:24:41,682 I never get to use the shotgun, man. It's like too loud. 579 00:24:41,816 --> 00:24:43,985 But this place? 580 00:24:44,118 --> 00:24:47,288 You're so in the middle of nowhere here, I... (chuckling) 581 00:24:47,421 --> 00:24:48,723 I couldn't resist. 582 00:24:49,390 --> 00:24:50,591 Oh, fuck. Shit. 583 00:24:50,725 --> 00:24:51,892 Hold up, hold up. 584 00:24:52,026 --> 00:24:54,628 Uh, supposed to read you something. 585 00:24:55,529 --> 00:24:56,430 Ah, here we go. 586 00:24:57,164 --> 00:24:59,934 "Mr. Travers, The Kingmaker is a teacher, 587 00:25:00,067 --> 00:25:02,303 and today he is teaching you..." 588 00:25:04,405 --> 00:25:05,406 You listening? 589 00:25:08,409 --> 00:25:09,643 (finger tapping) 590 00:25:09,777 --> 00:25:10,745 Shit! 591 00:25:12,413 --> 00:25:13,881 "The Kingmaker is above such things. 592 00:25:14,015 --> 00:25:15,783 The Kingmaker is a teacher, and today he is teaching 593 00:25:15,916 --> 00:25:18,085 the consequences of stealing from better men. 594 00:25:18,219 --> 00:25:19,954 Then shoot him." Then... 595 00:25:20,087 --> 00:25:21,722 Then shoot him! 596 00:25:21,856 --> 00:25:23,557 Right! 597 00:25:23,691 --> 00:25:24,658 Crap. 598 00:25:25,626 --> 00:25:27,695 (finger taps) (wind whistles) 599 00:25:27,828 --> 00:25:28,929 Oh, well. 600 00:25:30,664 --> 00:25:32,166 (Helter humming cheerfully) 601 00:25:32,299 --> 00:25:33,501 (Delilah laughs) 602 00:25:33,634 --> 00:25:34,568 - No, no, stop it. No. 603 00:25:34,702 --> 00:25:35,903 But seriously, seriously. 604 00:25:36,037 --> 00:25:37,638 That did sound like a gunshot earlier. 605 00:25:37,772 --> 00:25:40,174 - No, no, no, no. It's just a, a firework. 606 00:25:40,307 --> 00:25:41,409 They're, uh... 607 00:25:41,542 --> 00:25:43,010 Kids, they get in here, and they, 608 00:25:43,778 --> 00:25:45,379 they set 'em off all the time. 609 00:25:45,514 --> 00:25:47,248 - Uh, you're cool with that? 610 00:25:48,082 --> 00:25:51,419 - Yeah! Yeah, I mean, kids need to get hurt. 611 00:25:51,552 --> 00:25:54,523 Like, fewer fingers, stronger moral... 612 00:25:55,322 --> 00:25:56,323 Whatever. 613 00:25:56,457 --> 00:25:58,292 (Delilah laughs) 614 00:25:58,426 --> 00:25:59,593 - Okay, you... 615 00:25:59,727 --> 00:26:01,162 You're actually fun. (chuckles) 616 00:26:01,295 --> 00:26:03,431 But only when you've been drinking. 617 00:26:04,398 --> 00:26:05,132 (Delilah clears throat) 618 00:26:05,266 --> 00:26:06,535 Announcement! 619 00:26:06,667 --> 00:26:10,404 The do-over date is officially a success! 620 00:26:10,539 --> 00:26:12,606 (Delilah laughs) 621 00:26:12,740 --> 00:26:17,645 - (clears throat) So, so being drunk is a, a plus to you? 622 00:26:17,778 --> 00:26:19,213 - Oh, yeah, yeah. 623 00:26:19,346 --> 00:26:22,983 It makes it easier to get what I want, like answers. 624 00:26:23,117 --> 00:26:27,088 Like, why, Mr. Mad Scientist Man? Why? 625 00:26:27,221 --> 00:26:28,589 - Isn't curiosity enough? 626 00:26:28,722 --> 00:26:29,857 - No. 627 00:26:29,990 --> 00:26:32,093 I am curious about crypto, 628 00:26:32,226 --> 00:26:34,328 but I'm curious, because the more I know, 629 00:26:34,462 --> 00:26:36,464 the easier it is to game the suckers. 630 00:26:36,597 --> 00:26:38,332 I am curious about conspiracies 631 00:26:38,466 --> 00:26:41,268 because someone will always pay to believe it. 632 00:26:41,402 --> 00:26:43,270 I'm curious about sensitivity 633 00:26:43,404 --> 00:26:45,072 because humans love to control others 634 00:26:45,206 --> 00:26:48,175 while telling themselves they're the good guys. 635 00:26:48,309 --> 00:26:51,312 Curiosity always has an agenda, for people like me. 636 00:26:52,913 --> 00:26:53,914 Me and you. 637 00:26:54,882 --> 00:26:56,750 So, really. 638 00:26:58,619 --> 00:27:00,454 What is it that you want? 639 00:27:00,589 --> 00:27:02,723 - I want what everyone wants. 640 00:27:03,891 --> 00:27:05,527 To stand alone with God at the end of time 641 00:27:05,659 --> 00:27:07,094 and tell the bastard off. 642 00:27:07,228 --> 00:27:08,229 - Humble. 643 00:27:09,296 --> 00:27:11,999 And I bet ya five bucks God's a she. 644 00:27:13,267 --> 00:27:14,969 - Our world is shit. It's definitely a he. 645 00:27:15,102 --> 00:27:16,303 - Mm. - Okay! 646 00:27:16,437 --> 00:27:18,540 Let's go over this one more time. 647 00:27:18,672 --> 00:27:19,373 - Why? 648 00:27:19,508 --> 00:27:20,575 - Volume! 649 00:27:20,708 --> 00:27:22,209 I thought Eta was bringing coffee. 650 00:27:22,343 --> 00:27:26,180 - The machine works by using entangled particles. 651 00:27:26,313 --> 00:27:28,517 Now, one particle is tied to the entrance door. 652 00:27:28,649 --> 00:27:31,018 That's the door moving forward through time. 653 00:27:31,152 --> 00:27:33,821 The other particle is run through the accelerator, 654 00:27:33,954 --> 00:27:37,526 slowing its frame down to a near standstill in time. 655 00:27:37,658 --> 00:27:39,026 - Who are you explaining this for? 656 00:27:39,160 --> 00:27:42,296 - That particle is tied to the exit- 657 00:27:42,429 --> 00:27:44,298 - We all know this! 658 00:27:44,431 --> 00:27:47,701 - I'm not ashamed to admit this is actually helping. 659 00:27:47,835 --> 00:27:49,538 - But Alpha. 660 00:27:50,505 --> 00:27:51,205 - Mm-mm. 661 00:27:51,338 --> 00:27:52,740 - Alpha? 662 00:27:52,873 --> 00:27:55,042 Alpha, Alpha, Alpha has been on this side of the door, 663 00:27:55,176 --> 00:27:57,011 for longer than one minute. 664 00:27:57,144 --> 00:27:58,379 So, that means that the paradox 665 00:27:58,513 --> 00:28:00,247 has overtaken the time difference! 666 00:28:00,381 --> 00:28:01,348 - We know! 667 00:28:01,482 --> 00:28:02,716 (football thuds) - Ow! 668 00:28:02,850 --> 00:28:03,851 The fuck! 669 00:28:04,685 --> 00:28:06,287 Fuckin' asshole. (grunts) 670 00:28:06,420 --> 00:28:07,188 (football thudding) 671 00:28:07,321 --> 00:28:08,355 - Perfect timing. 672 00:28:09,857 --> 00:28:14,596 The problem is that the door only opens backwards in time. 673 00:28:15,963 --> 00:28:17,064 Send something through the exit door, 674 00:28:17,198 --> 00:28:18,866 and it's just a normal door. 675 00:28:18,999 --> 00:28:22,369 But use the entrance door, and... 676 00:28:24,639 --> 00:28:26,807 - [Past Tim] Ow! What the fuck? 677 00:28:26,941 --> 00:28:29,109 - See? I just threw that back in time. 678 00:28:29,243 --> 00:28:31,312 Hit Epsilon on the head and started that particular loop. 679 00:28:31,445 --> 00:28:34,215 - Sorry, but where did the football come from? 680 00:28:34,348 --> 00:28:36,016 - So, we just need to bring both doors 681 00:28:36,150 --> 00:28:37,552 into the same time frame, 682 00:28:37,686 --> 00:28:40,020 allowing us to travel the other way through, 683 00:28:40,154 --> 00:28:44,225 which, in theory, would let us catch up to the paradox! 684 00:28:45,492 --> 00:28:47,127 (group clapping) 685 00:28:47,261 --> 00:28:48,597 - Uh... 686 00:28:48,729 --> 00:28:51,265 Uh, seriously. Where did the, uh, football come from? 687 00:28:54,201 --> 00:28:55,604 - [Delilah] What about the multiverse? 688 00:28:55,736 --> 00:28:57,505 - [Gamma Tim] Which franchise? (chuckles) 689 00:28:57,639 --> 00:28:58,806 - [Delilah] God's. 690 00:29:00,007 --> 00:29:01,842 - [Gamma Tim] A multiverse is, is too convenient, right? 691 00:29:01,976 --> 00:29:04,044 It's not different versions of our lives. It's really- 692 00:29:04,178 --> 00:29:06,013 - I love the multiverse. 693 00:29:06,146 --> 00:29:08,482 I love all the different versions of me. 694 00:29:09,684 --> 00:29:10,685 - Oh. 695 00:29:12,152 --> 00:29:13,521 Okay. 696 00:29:13,655 --> 00:29:15,923 - It doesn't matter if I fuck up, because they made it. 697 00:29:18,259 --> 00:29:19,493 I like knowing that. 698 00:29:21,028 --> 00:29:23,397 There are some days I... 699 00:29:23,531 --> 00:29:24,633 I need that. 700 00:29:25,567 --> 00:29:28,603 - But if they succeeded, does that make them you? 701 00:29:30,137 --> 00:29:31,539 I mean, maybe... 702 00:29:31,673 --> 00:29:33,073 Maybe failing is what makes you you. 703 00:29:33,207 --> 00:29:35,677 Maybe, maybe failure is your defining trait. 704 00:29:38,012 --> 00:29:40,347 By which, I mean, um... 705 00:29:41,081 --> 00:29:41,982 - Recover. 706 00:29:42,116 --> 00:29:43,518 Recover fast. 707 00:29:44,385 --> 00:29:46,387 - Would you like to see my lab? 708 00:29:49,658 --> 00:29:50,592 - Okay. 709 00:29:51,258 --> 00:29:52,694 But seriously, fuck you. 710 00:29:57,599 --> 00:30:00,501 - So, this is the, uh... 711 00:30:00,635 --> 00:30:01,736 The lab! Um... 712 00:30:08,275 --> 00:30:11,378 Which we have all to ourselves. 713 00:30:12,313 --> 00:30:13,113 Apparently. 714 00:30:13,247 --> 00:30:14,281 - Why wouldn't we? 715 00:30:15,316 --> 00:30:19,486 Oh, right! Your time-looped friends. (chuckles) 716 00:30:19,621 --> 00:30:20,722 - (clears throat) Okay, okay. 717 00:30:20,888 --> 00:30:22,423 Uh, uh, uh, that's the wall. 718 00:30:22,557 --> 00:30:24,759 That's the, uh, the closet over there. 719 00:30:24,892 --> 00:30:26,994 That's a human hamster wheel. 720 00:30:27,127 --> 00:30:28,862 That's the time machine. Coffeemaker's broken. 721 00:30:28,996 --> 00:30:30,864 And that's basically it, so we should probably, 722 00:30:30,998 --> 00:30:32,199 probably go, right? 723 00:30:32,333 --> 00:30:35,436 - I'm sorry. "Human hamster wheel"? 724 00:30:37,237 --> 00:30:38,707 - That's, that's the piece you were impressed by? 725 00:30:38,839 --> 00:30:40,908 Oh, okay. Um, yeah, I mean, uh... 726 00:30:41,041 --> 00:30:45,346 I was trying a thing, but it didn't really work. 727 00:30:46,581 --> 00:30:47,615 Just too many feces. 728 00:30:47,749 --> 00:30:50,217 - Wow. Wow. (chuckles) 729 00:30:50,351 --> 00:30:54,556 I never thought I would be into a, um, LARPer. 730 00:30:54,689 --> 00:30:58,058 But (chuckles) your commitment is like... 731 00:30:58,192 --> 00:30:59,761 (Delilah smacks lips) 732 00:30:59,893 --> 00:31:00,961 (Tim chuckles) 733 00:31:01,095 --> 00:31:02,530 - Uh, sorry. What? 734 00:31:02,664 --> 00:31:06,601 - This! The, the toy guns, that prop! 735 00:31:06,735 --> 00:31:07,901 - My time machine is not a prop. 736 00:31:08,035 --> 00:31:09,236 - That. That right there. 737 00:31:09,370 --> 00:31:11,939 The commitment to the fantasy, I am... 738 00:31:12,072 --> 00:31:13,374 Ooh, I am into it. 739 00:31:13,508 --> 00:31:15,744 If I could afford to support a LARP like this, 740 00:31:15,876 --> 00:31:17,111 I don't even know what I would do with it. 741 00:31:17,244 --> 00:31:18,646 I, uh... 742 00:31:18,780 --> 00:31:19,581 (gasps) Ah. 743 00:31:19,714 --> 00:31:21,215 Paid LARP vacations. 744 00:31:21,348 --> 00:31:23,384 No, somebody must be doing that. 745 00:31:24,051 --> 00:31:25,419 If you could classify it as porn, 746 00:31:25,553 --> 00:31:27,589 you could have the staff screw the customers. 747 00:31:27,722 --> 00:31:29,089 - Eww! - Oh, don't be a prude. 748 00:31:29,223 --> 00:31:31,760 - No, no, no, no, no, no. Eww to, to LARPing! 749 00:31:31,892 --> 00:31:33,628 I mean, this? This is real! 750 00:31:33,762 --> 00:31:36,163 This is my, my life's work! 751 00:31:36,296 --> 00:31:38,499 - Okay, drop it already! 752 00:31:38,633 --> 00:31:39,868 Talk like a normal person, 753 00:31:40,000 --> 00:31:41,168 and not someone trying to sound smart! 754 00:31:41,301 --> 00:31:42,704 It's just not healthy! 755 00:31:42,837 --> 00:31:44,104 I bet ya five bucks you just spend 756 00:31:44,238 --> 00:31:46,240 too much time talking to yourself. 757 00:31:47,509 --> 00:31:50,911 (ominous synth music) 758 00:31:51,912 --> 00:31:52,980 Oh, my God. 759 00:31:53,113 --> 00:31:54,248 - Uh, Delilah, this- 760 00:31:54,381 --> 00:31:55,382 - Okay! 761 00:31:55,517 --> 00:31:56,818 Get away from me! 762 00:31:56,950 --> 00:31:57,852 (Delilah screams) 763 00:31:57,985 --> 00:31:59,788 - No, not that way! 764 00:32:01,054 --> 00:32:02,423 (Delilah screams) 765 00:32:02,557 --> 00:32:06,193 (Delilahs screaming) 766 00:32:06,326 --> 00:32:07,695 Probably fine, right? 767 00:32:07,829 --> 00:32:10,364 - If I could afford to support a LARP like this, 768 00:32:10,497 --> 00:32:11,800 I don't even know what I would do with it. 769 00:32:11,932 --> 00:32:13,367 I, uh... 770 00:32:13,500 --> 00:32:14,935 (gasps) Ah. 771 00:32:15,068 --> 00:32:16,003 Paid LARP vacations. 772 00:32:16,136 --> 00:32:17,906 No, somebody must be doing that. 773 00:32:18,640 --> 00:32:20,909 If you could classify it as porn, you... 774 00:32:21,041 --> 00:32:23,477 (footsteps clacking) 775 00:32:23,611 --> 00:32:25,513 (ominous synth music) 776 00:32:25,647 --> 00:32:28,917 (Delilahs screaming) 777 00:32:30,284 --> 00:32:32,854 (gun fires) - No! Oh! 778 00:32:32,986 --> 00:32:34,288 - Oh, my god. 779 00:32:34,421 --> 00:32:35,322 - Oh, my god! 780 00:32:35,456 --> 00:32:36,658 - [Tim] What the hell was that? 781 00:32:36,791 --> 00:32:37,792 Damn it, did you drop something again? 782 00:32:37,926 --> 00:32:39,828 (Tims chattering) 783 00:32:39,960 --> 00:32:42,396 - [Tims] Whoa, whoa, whoa! 784 00:32:42,530 --> 00:32:45,499 - Why would you do that? (Delilah screaming) 785 00:32:45,633 --> 00:32:46,801 - Holy shit! 786 00:32:46,935 --> 00:32:48,168 - Just, just, just give me the gun. 787 00:32:48,302 --> 00:32:49,504 - [Tim] Give him the gun! 788 00:32:50,304 --> 00:32:51,438 - Stay back! All of you, stay back! 789 00:32:51,573 --> 00:32:53,675 - Just calm down. - Be cool, man! 790 00:32:53,808 --> 00:32:55,042 - Shut up, you freak! 791 00:32:55,175 --> 00:32:57,612 - Let's not be hypocritical here. 792 00:32:57,745 --> 00:32:59,346 (Tims murmuring) 793 00:32:59,480 --> 00:33:02,416 (gun fires) (Delilah screams) 794 00:33:02,550 --> 00:33:03,751 (footsteps clacking) 795 00:33:03,885 --> 00:33:05,285 (door thuds) 796 00:33:05,419 --> 00:33:06,220 - So? 797 00:33:06,353 --> 00:33:07,789 How did the date go? 798 00:33:09,858 --> 00:33:10,792 What? 799 00:33:11,559 --> 00:33:12,993 (phone vibrates and rings) 800 00:33:13,126 --> 00:33:14,729 - Delilah? Delilah, look- - Don't you dare follow me! 801 00:33:14,863 --> 00:33:16,196 - Don't, don't worry, we won't. (chuckles) Come on. 802 00:33:16,330 --> 00:33:17,899 Like, a bunch of guys chasing a lone woman 803 00:33:18,031 --> 00:33:20,000 around their private compound at night? 804 00:33:20,133 --> 00:33:23,638 It's not exactly a great, a great look. Um... 805 00:33:24,271 --> 00:33:25,305 probably shouldn't have said that. 806 00:33:25,439 --> 00:33:26,340 - No shit! 807 00:33:27,107 --> 00:33:29,409 Listen, I don't have a box to put this in 808 00:33:29,544 --> 00:33:31,378 that will fit in my brain without, 809 00:33:31,513 --> 00:33:33,146 bet ya five bucks, exploding my head. 810 00:33:33,280 --> 00:33:36,216 So, let's just forget this ever happened. (chuckles) 811 00:33:36,350 --> 00:33:37,284 (gasoline splashing) 812 00:33:37,417 --> 00:33:40,153 - Trust me, it, it happened. 813 00:33:40,287 --> 00:33:41,556 - But reality is subjective, so no. 814 00:33:41,689 --> 00:33:43,290 - Subjective? Tell her that! 815 00:33:43,423 --> 00:33:44,391 - Nope! 816 00:33:45,425 --> 00:33:46,528 Oh, fuck! 817 00:33:46,661 --> 00:33:49,463 Motherfuckin' shit dick slug nug! 818 00:33:50,565 --> 00:33:51,799 (Delilah gasps) 819 00:33:51,933 --> 00:33:54,969 (Delilah screams) 820 00:33:58,006 --> 00:33:59,039 (fire roars) - Whoa! 821 00:33:59,172 --> 00:34:00,808 - Thanks for the jugs! 822 00:34:04,846 --> 00:34:05,680 Evening. 823 00:34:05,813 --> 00:34:07,114 - Travers? 824 00:34:07,247 --> 00:34:09,651 - (grunts) All right. (car door slams) 825 00:34:09,784 --> 00:34:11,351 Let's get going. (knocks on car window) 826 00:34:11,485 --> 00:34:13,487 Oh, Jesus Christ. 827 00:34:13,621 --> 00:34:16,223 (car window scraping) 828 00:34:16,356 --> 00:34:17,124 Yes. 829 00:34:17,257 --> 00:34:19,961 - You're Tim Travers. 830 00:34:20,093 --> 00:34:21,395 - We've established that. 831 00:34:21,529 --> 00:34:22,964 (Helter chuckles) 832 00:34:23,096 --> 00:34:24,933 - You're not gonna believe this, but earlier tonight, 833 00:34:25,065 --> 00:34:26,834 I met a guy who looked exactly... 834 00:34:26,968 --> 00:34:31,071 I mean, exactly like you. (chuckles) 835 00:34:31,204 --> 00:34:34,709 - Just have one of those faces, I guess. 836 00:34:34,842 --> 00:34:36,611 - You do! (chuckles) - Yeah. 837 00:34:36,744 --> 00:34:38,111 Okay, I'm gonna get going, so, uh, 838 00:34:38,245 --> 00:34:40,213 you have a lovely little evening or whatever. 839 00:34:40,347 --> 00:34:43,417 Jesus Christ! (gun fires) 840 00:34:43,551 --> 00:34:46,219 (Helter shudders) 841 00:34:46,353 --> 00:34:47,087 (flesh squelches) 842 00:34:47,220 --> 00:34:48,255 - Ah, shit! 843 00:34:49,591 --> 00:34:52,927 Uh, "The Kingmaker is a teacher." 844 00:34:55,195 --> 00:34:56,831 Fuck, I did it again. 845 00:34:56,965 --> 00:34:58,666 Stupid fuckin' note. 846 00:34:58,800 --> 00:35:00,702 - [Tim] I mean, I didn't even know that the gun was loaded. 847 00:35:00,835 --> 00:35:04,639 - So, does anyone else think it's a little weird 848 00:35:04,772 --> 00:35:06,941 that she shot her other self? 849 00:35:07,075 --> 00:35:10,110 I mean, I get that we did that as part of the experiment. 850 00:35:10,243 --> 00:35:11,512 She didn't know that. 851 00:35:11,646 --> 00:35:12,680 I mean, maybe that was just some other woman 852 00:35:12,814 --> 00:35:14,414 that looked a lot like her. 853 00:35:14,549 --> 00:35:18,720 Just a little weird that, uh, murder was her go-to response. 854 00:35:18,853 --> 00:35:19,821 - (sighs) I liked her. 855 00:35:19,954 --> 00:35:21,522 - You saw no red flags there? 856 00:35:21,656 --> 00:35:24,592 - She did mention something about "crushing peasants"? 857 00:35:24,726 --> 00:35:25,593 - Oh! 858 00:35:25,727 --> 00:35:27,260 I see what's going on here. 859 00:35:27,394 --> 00:35:29,329 You thought that she would fix you! 860 00:35:29,463 --> 00:35:30,832 - Fuck you! - Oh, fuck you. 861 00:35:30,965 --> 00:35:32,199 - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 862 00:35:32,332 --> 00:35:33,433 Guys, just, let's just chill, okay? 863 00:35:33,568 --> 00:35:34,736 - Fuck you, too. - Fuck off! 864 00:35:34,869 --> 00:35:36,370 - Fuck you! - Fuck both of you. 865 00:35:36,504 --> 00:35:37,905 - Fuck all of you! 866 00:35:38,039 --> 00:35:39,540 - Fuck that, too! - All right. 867 00:35:39,674 --> 00:35:40,975 I'm just gonna gonna say it. - Fuck you, motherfucker! 868 00:35:41,109 --> 00:35:42,275 - You all thinking what I'm thinking? 869 00:35:42,409 --> 00:35:44,244 - That's exactly what I'm thinking. 870 00:35:44,378 --> 00:35:45,713 - Tim Travers? 871 00:35:46,547 --> 00:35:48,049 Go fuck yourself. 872 00:35:48,181 --> 00:35:49,182 - Fuck yeah. 873 00:35:49,316 --> 00:35:51,619 - [Sigma Tim] Oh, yeah! 874 00:35:51,753 --> 00:35:54,287 - What's that for? - Mood music. 875 00:35:55,355 --> 00:35:58,026 (mellow music) 876 00:35:58,158 --> 00:35:59,226 - [Lambda Tim] Okay. 877 00:35:59,359 --> 00:36:00,595 Okay, uh... 878 00:36:00,728 --> 00:36:01,996 Hold on. You know what? 879 00:36:02,130 --> 00:36:03,263 Let's turn it up. 880 00:36:04,398 --> 00:36:06,534 - [Delivery Guy] Yeah, it's pick-up from here on, buddy. 881 00:36:06,668 --> 00:36:08,036 - Hey. Hey, how are you? 882 00:36:08,168 --> 00:36:09,604 Um, the uh, orgy's happening. 883 00:36:09,737 --> 00:36:12,073 - Oh, ho, ho, ho! Well, it's about time! 884 00:36:12,205 --> 00:36:13,340 (giggles) Woo! 885 00:36:13,473 --> 00:36:14,474 - Yes. 886 00:36:16,376 --> 00:36:17,779 That'll work. 887 00:36:17,912 --> 00:36:19,413 (Zeta Tim chuckles) 888 00:36:19,547 --> 00:36:20,515 I... 889 00:36:21,949 --> 00:36:23,685 I figured it out. 890 00:36:23,818 --> 00:36:25,553 (chuckles) I did it! 891 00:36:25,687 --> 00:36:26,921 You guys, we... 892 00:36:27,055 --> 00:36:30,490 (muffled mellow music) 893 00:36:32,694 --> 00:36:34,428 Where is everybody? 894 00:36:35,096 --> 00:36:39,232 ♪ I met God and it's all a lie ♪ 895 00:36:40,300 --> 00:36:43,604 ♪ And I don't know why ♪ (muffled Tims moaning) 896 00:36:43,738 --> 00:36:48,910 ♪ We never die ♪ (muffled Tims grunting) 897 00:36:49,409 --> 00:36:52,180 - Hold that other leg. (moans) - Oh, yeah! 898 00:36:52,312 --> 00:36:56,216 (Tims grunting and panting) 899 00:36:57,284 --> 00:36:59,120 Stop licking me. (Tims grunting) 900 00:36:59,252 --> 00:37:00,387 - Who are you? 901 00:37:00,521 --> 00:37:02,023 - They asked me to hold the coffee. 902 00:37:02,156 --> 00:37:04,926 - [Tim] Say my name. Say my name, Tim! 903 00:37:05,059 --> 00:37:07,327 Say my name, Tim! (flesh slapping) 904 00:37:07,461 --> 00:37:09,931 - [Tim] Tim, Tim, Tim. 905 00:37:10,064 --> 00:37:11,199 Say my name. 906 00:37:11,331 --> 00:37:13,568 Say my name, Tim! (flesh slapping) 907 00:37:13,701 --> 00:37:14,969 Tim! 908 00:37:15,103 --> 00:37:19,974 (muffled mellow music) (muffled Tims grunting) 909 00:37:22,577 --> 00:37:26,047 (hamster wheel clacks) 910 00:37:27,115 --> 00:37:29,984 (paper rustles) 911 00:37:35,823 --> 00:37:41,129 (muffled mellow music) (muffled Tims grunting) 912 00:37:43,598 --> 00:37:46,200 (mellow music) 913 00:37:46,333 --> 00:37:48,603 - [Alpha Tim] Delta, no names. 914 00:37:48,736 --> 00:37:51,338 (Tim groans) 915 00:37:53,741 --> 00:37:55,743 - [Tau Tim] Oh, God. I feel so close to you right now. 916 00:37:55,877 --> 00:37:58,646 (Tims moaning) 917 00:38:00,248 --> 00:38:03,785 ♪ 'Cause I give myself ♪ 918 00:38:04,819 --> 00:38:07,487 (hand slaps) 919 00:38:07,622 --> 00:38:09,322 - [Tim] No, lick there, lick there. 920 00:38:09,456 --> 00:38:11,125 - Okay, but what about the soul? 921 00:38:11,259 --> 00:38:12,894 How does time travel account 922 00:38:13,027 --> 00:38:15,428 for two spirits occupying the same space? 923 00:38:15,563 --> 00:38:17,698 - The same way that it accounts for unicorns and dragons 924 00:38:17,832 --> 00:38:19,834 or other shit that isn't real! 925 00:38:19,967 --> 00:38:21,501 We are just meat! 926 00:38:21,636 --> 00:38:23,671 The meaning of life is to eat, shit, 927 00:38:23,805 --> 00:38:27,074 fuck to create more meat, and repeat, until we die, alone! 928 00:38:29,610 --> 00:38:33,014 In the end... (somber music) 929 00:38:33,915 --> 00:38:35,116 All of us are alone. 930 00:38:36,349 --> 00:38:39,921 (muffled Tims grunting) 931 00:38:43,356 --> 00:38:44,759 - We'll be right back with more Tim Travers 932 00:38:44,892 --> 00:38:47,128 and his super happy outlook on life. 933 00:38:48,629 --> 00:38:51,032 - I'm so confused. 934 00:38:51,165 --> 00:38:53,234 How does someone affiliate the time dilation 935 00:38:53,366 --> 00:38:56,070 of an accelerated particle to a door frame? 936 00:38:56,204 --> 00:38:58,773 - Okay, you're not listening. I need you to hear me, okay? 937 00:38:58,906 --> 00:39:01,742 This guy is crazy. I think, I think he might be a terrorist. 938 00:39:01,876 --> 00:39:03,578 - Oh, honey. 939 00:39:03,711 --> 00:39:07,315 Weirdo or no, labeling somebody with that term? 940 00:39:07,447 --> 00:39:08,850 - He's white. 941 00:39:08,983 --> 00:39:12,153 - Uh, oh, shit. Yeah, definitely a terrorist then. 942 00:39:12,286 --> 00:39:14,155 What is this guy's name? 943 00:39:14,288 --> 00:39:15,723 - Tim. Tim Travers. 944 00:39:15,857 --> 00:39:16,858 - Who? 945 00:39:20,261 --> 00:39:20,895 Who? 946 00:39:21,028 --> 00:39:22,296 - Tim Travers! 947 00:39:25,233 --> 00:39:26,334 - Who in the fuck... (gun clicks) 948 00:39:26,466 --> 00:39:28,936 - Oh, my! 949 00:39:29,070 --> 00:39:30,338 - Whoa. - I hate this town. 950 00:39:30,470 --> 00:39:32,405 I hate everyone in it, so, so much! 951 00:39:34,575 --> 00:39:37,812 Bet ya five bucks I've had a weirder day than you. 952 00:39:37,945 --> 00:39:38,846 - You're on. 953 00:39:39,513 --> 00:39:41,349 - [Kappa Tim] You guys have no idea. 954 00:39:41,481 --> 00:39:42,917 (Tims chattering) 955 00:39:43,050 --> 00:39:45,553 - It's gonna hold. - It's too much power. 956 00:39:45,686 --> 00:39:48,723 (Tims chattering) 957 00:39:49,657 --> 00:39:52,660 (ominous music) 958 00:39:52,793 --> 00:39:54,394 It's classic Tim. 959 00:39:55,963 --> 00:39:58,966 (Tims chattering) 960 00:39:59,767 --> 00:40:01,302 - You sluts! 961 00:40:01,434 --> 00:40:03,571 - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. We do not need the judgment. 962 00:40:03,704 --> 00:40:05,405 Where, where'd you get the coffee? 963 00:40:05,539 --> 00:40:06,507 - Sorry. 964 00:40:09,277 --> 00:40:12,412 (Zeta Tim gulping) 965 00:40:15,549 --> 00:40:16,918 (Zeta Tim exhales loudly) 966 00:40:17,051 --> 00:40:18,019 Last cup. 967 00:40:19,020 --> 00:40:20,121 (Tims sighing) 968 00:40:20,254 --> 00:40:21,122 Delivery guy must've stolen the rest. 969 00:40:21,255 --> 00:40:23,324 I bet you forgot to tip. 970 00:40:23,991 --> 00:40:26,527 (Tim cackling wickedly) 971 00:40:26,661 --> 00:40:28,629 - Fuck you, motherfucker! 972 00:40:28,763 --> 00:40:29,697 - Damn. 973 00:40:30,463 --> 00:40:32,600 - So? (clears throat) 974 00:40:32,733 --> 00:40:33,935 (distant Tim singing indistinctly) 975 00:40:34,068 --> 00:40:35,336 How was, uh... 976 00:40:36,504 --> 00:40:37,405 It? 977 00:40:37,538 --> 00:40:38,673 - Amazing. - Incredible. 978 00:40:38,806 --> 00:40:40,440 - Best sex ever. - Obviously great! 979 00:40:40,574 --> 00:40:41,709 Uh... (laughs) 980 00:40:41,842 --> 00:40:43,511 - Pretty bland, honestly. 981 00:40:45,212 --> 00:40:46,514 Oh. Oh, I'm sorry. 982 00:40:46,647 --> 00:40:47,447 I thought we were done jerking each other off. 983 00:40:47,581 --> 00:40:48,649 It was great! 984 00:40:49,449 --> 00:40:54,021 - In all fairness, a great bonding experience. 985 00:40:54,822 --> 00:40:58,926 And, uh, I learned some things about myself, and... 986 00:40:59,060 --> 00:41:00,161 (Tau Tim breathes deeply) 987 00:41:00,294 --> 00:41:01,228 - Tau! 988 00:41:02,063 --> 00:41:05,132 How about you go get us some more coffee? 989 00:41:05,266 --> 00:41:06,734 Go. 990 00:41:06,867 --> 00:41:07,868 Go now. 991 00:41:09,003 --> 00:41:10,504 Now! 992 00:41:10,638 --> 00:41:11,706 - You're just jealous that no one invited you to the orgy. 993 00:41:11,839 --> 00:41:13,140 - [Tims] Ooh! 994 00:41:15,509 --> 00:41:18,212 (tense music) 995 00:41:21,248 --> 00:41:22,350 - Get. 996 00:41:22,482 --> 00:41:23,451 Out. 997 00:41:29,357 --> 00:41:31,459 - "Go get the coffee, Tau. Hold my wrench, Tau. 998 00:41:31,592 --> 00:41:33,127 Lube is for sissies, Tau." 999 00:41:33,260 --> 00:41:35,763 Well, that's why no one invited you to the orgy, asshole! 1000 00:41:36,597 --> 00:41:39,367 (Helter clears throat) (suspenseful music) 1001 00:41:39,499 --> 00:41:41,068 (Tau Tim sighs) 1002 00:41:41,202 --> 00:41:42,636 And you are? 1003 00:41:42,770 --> 00:41:44,305 (gun cocks) Whoa. (chuckles) 1004 00:41:44,438 --> 00:41:45,873 Whoa, whoa, whoa, man. 1005 00:41:46,007 --> 00:41:47,875 - I don't know how you're doing this, but it won't work. 1006 00:41:48,009 --> 00:41:50,044 Decoys? Body doubles? 1007 00:41:50,177 --> 00:41:51,946 Magic tricks? I don't fuckin' care. 1008 00:41:52,079 --> 00:41:54,415 I will do this all goddamn night, if I have to, 1009 00:41:54,548 --> 00:41:56,517 because I am a professional! 1010 00:41:56,650 --> 00:41:58,085 (Tau Tim chuckles) 1011 00:41:58,219 --> 00:41:59,720 - Okay, I think there has been a big misunderstanding! 1012 00:41:59,854 --> 00:42:01,155 - Shut up! 1013 00:42:01,288 --> 00:42:04,692 I have a message for you from The Kingmaker. 1014 00:42:06,961 --> 00:42:08,863 - Oh, shit. That guy, um- 1015 00:42:08,996 --> 00:42:10,264 - "Mr. Travers. 1016 00:42:10,398 --> 00:42:14,268 Do not think of this as punishment or revenge. 1017 00:42:14,402 --> 00:42:16,837 The Kingmaker is above such things. 1018 00:42:16,971 --> 00:42:18,539 The Kingmaker is a teacher, 1019 00:42:18,672 --> 00:42:21,942 and today, he is teaching you the consequences 1020 00:42:22,076 --> 00:42:25,246 of stealing from better men." 1021 00:42:26,614 --> 00:42:27,581 There. 1022 00:42:28,582 --> 00:42:29,483 I said it. 1023 00:42:29,617 --> 00:42:33,220 I read the whole damn message. 1024 00:42:33,354 --> 00:42:35,156 And now, I just wanna be absolutely sure 1025 00:42:35,289 --> 00:42:37,391 that I'm killing the right guy this time. 1026 00:42:37,526 --> 00:42:40,728 So, are you Tim Travers? 1027 00:42:41,629 --> 00:42:42,463 - No? 1028 00:42:42,596 --> 00:42:43,532 - Liar! (gun fires) 1029 00:42:43,664 --> 00:42:44,533 (Tau Tim yelps) 1030 00:42:44,665 --> 00:42:45,499 (gun cocks) 1031 00:42:45,633 --> 00:42:46,333 (gun fires) 1032 00:42:46,467 --> 00:42:47,168 (gun cocks) 1033 00:42:47,301 --> 00:42:49,203 (gun fires) 1034 00:42:49,336 --> 00:42:53,007 (brooding synth music) (Helter muttering) 1035 00:42:53,140 --> 00:42:55,910 (Helter grunts) 1036 00:42:56,710 --> 00:42:59,647 (machinery bleeping) (sparks crackling) 1037 00:42:59,780 --> 00:43:05,052 (Tims chattering drowned out by machinery) 1038 00:43:05,753 --> 00:43:07,455 - (clears throat) Oh. 1039 00:43:07,588 --> 00:43:09,023 You're the, uh, the Tim 1040 00:43:09,156 --> 00:43:11,792 that wasn't taking anyone's crap earlier, right? 1041 00:43:11,926 --> 00:43:13,027 - (chuckles) Yeah. 1042 00:43:13,160 --> 00:43:15,863 I mean, come off it, right? 1043 00:43:15,996 --> 00:43:17,264 Yeah, it's like we're all putting on this performance, 1044 00:43:17,398 --> 00:43:18,232 and for who? 1045 00:43:18,365 --> 00:43:21,135 - Our egos. (laughs) 1046 00:43:21,268 --> 00:43:23,070 Anyway, it was, good on you. 1047 00:43:23,838 --> 00:43:26,340 - No, you'd have done the same. (clears throat) 1048 00:43:26,474 --> 00:43:28,909 - I didn't, though. Which is weird, right? 1049 00:43:29,043 --> 00:43:31,145 I mean, maybe the, uh, experience drift 1050 00:43:31,278 --> 00:43:34,181 between individual Tims is, is growing. 1051 00:43:34,315 --> 00:43:36,217 - Well, a few hours can change a person. 1052 00:43:36,350 --> 00:43:37,852 - Yeah, that's what my doctor... 1053 00:43:37,985 --> 00:43:40,421 (wrench clangs) Oh. 1054 00:43:40,555 --> 00:43:42,223 - I'll get that. 1055 00:43:42,356 --> 00:43:44,158 (Gamma Tim chuckles) 1056 00:43:44,291 --> 00:43:46,026 Here. - Oh, thanks. 1057 00:43:49,864 --> 00:43:52,933 (both chuckling) 1058 00:43:53,067 --> 00:43:54,935 I'm just... (electricity crackling) 1059 00:43:55,069 --> 00:43:58,372 (footsteps clacking) 1060 00:43:59,340 --> 00:44:00,908 - Oh, fuck! That's hot. 1061 00:44:01,041 --> 00:44:03,911 Which is why it will double the energy output, 1062 00:44:04,044 --> 00:44:05,913 and also the radiation. 1063 00:44:06,914 --> 00:44:08,482 - Well, what about matter? 1064 00:44:08,617 --> 00:44:12,086 - Yeah, I think that matters! - No, no. What about matter? 1065 00:44:12,219 --> 00:44:13,555 Every time we create a new Tim, 1066 00:44:13,687 --> 00:44:16,957 where is the matter coming from, you know? 1067 00:44:17,091 --> 00:44:18,627 - [Lambda Tim] Huh. 1068 00:44:18,759 --> 00:44:20,361 We must be pulling it from somewhere else in the Universe. 1069 00:44:20,494 --> 00:44:22,597 The equivalent to 20... 1070 00:44:22,730 --> 00:44:24,231 No, no, 30 30? 1071 00:44:24,365 --> 00:44:25,733 - [Lambda Tim] Tims. 1072 00:44:25,866 --> 00:44:27,334 - [Kappa Tim] Ah, fuck. That's too many Tims. 1073 00:44:27,468 --> 00:44:28,702 - [Lambda Tim] Yeah, I'd say. 1074 00:44:28,836 --> 00:44:30,505 - [Reporter] Thank you, Jason McKee, 1075 00:44:30,639 --> 00:44:34,141 for that insightful report on postpartum depression for men. 1076 00:44:34,275 --> 00:44:36,877 On to national news tonight, at a Mississippi church, 1077 00:44:37,011 --> 00:44:39,947 30 parishioners appear to have been raptured. 1078 00:44:40,080 --> 00:44:43,951 Details are vague, but experts are dismissing this theory, 1079 00:44:44,084 --> 00:44:47,388 instead arguing for wormhole displacement theory. 1080 00:44:47,522 --> 00:44:49,857 In spite of the evidence... 1081 00:44:49,990 --> 00:44:51,091 - Shut up. 1082 00:44:51,225 --> 00:44:53,160 All right, everybody! (claps hands) 1083 00:44:53,294 --> 00:44:55,162 Gather round! Gather round! 1084 00:44:55,296 --> 00:44:58,332 All right, make a little semicircle for me. 1085 00:44:58,465 --> 00:44:59,967 (Tims coughing) 1086 00:45:00,100 --> 00:45:03,837 Close enough. I have some sad news. 1087 00:45:03,971 --> 00:45:05,973 Tau Tim has been murdered. 1088 00:45:06,106 --> 00:45:07,474 - Oh, no, not Tau. - Who? 1089 00:45:07,609 --> 00:45:08,809 - Yeah, very sad. 1090 00:45:08,943 --> 00:45:10,311 Anyway, somebody's been picking off the Tims 1091 00:45:10,444 --> 00:45:12,479 on the coffee runs, so from here on out, 1092 00:45:12,614 --> 00:45:14,949 I am imposing the buddy system. 1093 00:45:15,082 --> 00:45:16,083 - Boo! 1094 00:45:17,652 --> 00:45:20,321 - Also, this does mean there is no coffee. 1095 00:45:20,454 --> 00:45:21,556 - Oh, come on! 1096 00:45:21,690 --> 00:45:22,856 - You've gotta be fucking kidding me! 1097 00:45:22,990 --> 00:45:24,992 - [Tim] I fucking hate this place! 1098 00:45:25,125 --> 00:45:27,795 - [Omicron Tim] (chuckles) She was into a multiverses? 1099 00:45:27,928 --> 00:45:29,330 - [Gamma Tim] Exactly. 1100 00:45:29,463 --> 00:45:30,998 And I have this whole theory about why multiverses 1101 00:45:31,131 --> 00:45:33,200 are stupid and people like them anyway. 1102 00:45:33,901 --> 00:45:37,071 I tried not to say anything, ended up being a dick anyway. 1103 00:45:37,204 --> 00:45:38,172 - Well... 1104 00:45:39,139 --> 00:45:40,341 What's your theory? 1105 00:45:40,474 --> 00:45:41,543 - I mean, obviously you know it already. 1106 00:45:41,676 --> 00:45:44,311 - Yeah, but... (sighs) 1107 00:45:44,445 --> 00:45:46,013 It'd be nice to hear somebody else say it. 1108 00:45:46,146 --> 00:45:50,050 I'm just so tired of hearing my own voice, you know? 1109 00:45:50,184 --> 00:45:52,786 - That resonates. (sighs) 1110 00:45:54,188 --> 00:45:56,323 The multiverse isn't different versions of our lives. 1111 00:45:56,457 --> 00:45:58,158 It's actually different sets of laws. 1112 00:45:58,292 --> 00:46:00,629 I mean, why should one plus one equal two, right? 1113 00:46:00,761 --> 00:46:04,331 I mean, why was there slightly more matter than anti-matter? 1114 00:46:04,465 --> 00:46:06,200 It's the same as the entirety of history. It's just the- 1115 00:46:06,333 --> 00:46:09,069 - The newest way to put ourselves at the center. 1116 00:46:09,903 --> 00:46:12,039 To convince ourselves that we matter. 1117 00:46:12,172 --> 00:46:14,676 - Why is not mattering so bad? 1118 00:46:14,808 --> 00:46:18,379 I mean, why is it so terrifying to... (sighs) 1119 00:46:18,513 --> 00:46:19,880 Not be the most important person? 1120 00:46:20,014 --> 00:46:20,981 - It's freeing. 1121 00:46:21,782 --> 00:46:24,586 My mistakes are mine and mine alone. 1122 00:46:24,719 --> 00:46:26,020 - As are my victories. 1123 00:46:29,390 --> 00:46:30,391 - In life. 1124 00:46:31,492 --> 00:46:32,627 - In science. 1125 00:46:34,763 --> 00:46:35,764 - In love? 1126 00:46:41,368 --> 00:46:45,507 (phone vibrates and chirps) 1127 00:46:45,640 --> 00:46:48,942 I got it. (chuckles) 1128 00:46:50,044 --> 00:46:51,178 - What is it? 1129 00:46:51,312 --> 00:46:52,813 - Something about missing coffee. 1130 00:46:52,946 --> 00:46:53,947 I'm honestly still trying to figure out why our phones 1131 00:46:54,081 --> 00:46:55,517 are working like this. 1132 00:46:55,650 --> 00:46:56,950 - Someone at Verizon is having a meltdown right now. 1133 00:46:57,084 --> 00:46:58,252 (both chuckling) 1134 00:46:58,385 --> 00:47:03,725 (door motor humming) (ominous music) 1135 00:47:04,191 --> 00:47:07,662 (car door clicks open) 1136 00:47:08,663 --> 00:47:11,566 (car door slams) 1137 00:47:12,767 --> 00:47:16,136 (phone rings) (suspenseful music) 1138 00:47:16,270 --> 00:47:19,139 - Oh, shit! (phone rings) 1139 00:47:19,273 --> 00:47:20,709 Yeah, Boss? 1140 00:47:20,841 --> 00:47:23,377 - [Kingmaker] You know I do not like to be kept waiting. 1141 00:47:23,511 --> 00:47:25,279 - [Helter] Yeah, I know, I know, but it's fine. 1142 00:47:25,412 --> 00:47:27,414 - [Kingmaker] Helter? 1143 00:47:27,549 --> 00:47:28,650 Helter! (phone chimes) 1144 00:47:28,783 --> 00:47:31,318 Is the bastard dead already? 1145 00:47:31,452 --> 00:47:34,421 This guy goes off-grid for a year, 1146 00:47:34,556 --> 00:47:36,924 and then the idiot shows up on a podcast. 1147 00:47:37,057 --> 00:47:38,859 - I swear, I, I... 1148 00:47:38,992 --> 00:47:40,260 I don't understand. 1149 00:47:40,394 --> 00:47:42,196 - [Kingmaker] Do I need to bring in Royce? 1150 00:47:45,734 --> 00:47:47,101 - Royce? 1151 00:47:47,234 --> 00:47:49,103 - [Kingmaker] Royce. 1152 00:47:50,037 --> 00:47:50,904 - Royce is here? 1153 00:47:51,038 --> 00:47:52,507 - [Kingmaker] Near enough. 1154 00:47:52,640 --> 00:47:55,777 So, do your job, and if I don't hear from you in one hour, 1155 00:47:55,909 --> 00:47:58,713 I am bringing in Royce. 1156 00:47:58,847 --> 00:48:00,749 (phone chimes) 1157 00:48:00,881 --> 00:48:02,851 - Fuck! Fuckin' cunt fuck! (horn honks) 1158 00:48:02,983 --> 00:48:05,486 (horn honks) Fucking brother! 1159 00:48:05,620 --> 00:48:06,621 Fuck! 1160 00:48:07,921 --> 00:48:09,189 - I'd like to point out to the audience, 1161 00:48:09,323 --> 00:48:12,292 this is the first pause Tim has taken. 1162 00:48:12,993 --> 00:48:14,294 Why are you even here? 1163 00:48:15,362 --> 00:48:17,565 I mean, you don't respect any of us. 1164 00:48:17,699 --> 00:48:18,932 You've just been ranting at my audience 1165 00:48:19,066 --> 00:48:21,268 and me for two hours, torturing us. 1166 00:48:22,537 --> 00:48:24,138 Did I do something to you? 1167 00:48:24,271 --> 00:48:26,875 Did I beat you up on a playground somewhere when I was- 1168 00:48:27,007 --> 00:48:28,442 - No, no, nothing like that. 1169 00:48:28,576 --> 00:48:29,644 You just dumbed down the human race a little bit. 1170 00:48:29,778 --> 00:48:31,245 - Why is it so important for you 1171 00:48:31,378 --> 00:48:35,349 to be smarter than a guy you don't even respect? 1172 00:48:36,651 --> 00:48:38,853 I mean, who are you trying to impress here? 1173 00:48:45,627 --> 00:48:48,262 What is the point of all this? 1174 00:48:48,395 --> 00:48:50,330 - Well, isn't it obvious? (chuckles) 1175 00:48:50,464 --> 00:48:52,332 If something should go wrong when I turn on the machine, 1176 00:48:52,466 --> 00:48:55,402 a record would be a pretty good thing to have. 1177 00:48:55,537 --> 00:48:57,404 You were the only one who took the interview. 1178 00:48:57,539 --> 00:48:59,507 - With full love and respect, 1179 00:49:00,374 --> 00:49:03,944 I hope you die a very painful death. 1180 00:49:04,646 --> 00:49:06,714 - Aww. (dark music) 1181 00:49:06,848 --> 00:49:08,215 - [Tim] No, no. I still have mine. 1182 00:49:08,348 --> 00:49:10,117 - I heard this Somebody probably- 1183 00:49:10,250 --> 00:49:11,619 - [Tim] No, no. I told you! 1184 00:49:13,220 --> 00:49:14,121 - Hey! 1185 00:49:15,055 --> 00:49:18,959 Uh, I think that things might be about to get weird, 1186 00:49:19,092 --> 00:49:20,360 or weird, weirder. 1187 00:49:20,494 --> 00:49:22,329 (Omicron Tim laughs) Um... 1188 00:49:22,463 --> 00:49:24,699 I don't know, I thought maybe it'd be a good idea 1189 00:49:24,833 --> 00:49:28,302 to have a way to, you know, recognize each other. 1190 00:49:28,435 --> 00:49:32,339 - Why would we need a way to, uh, recognize each other? 1191 00:49:33,641 --> 00:49:34,642 - Um... 1192 00:49:35,944 --> 00:49:38,111 Well, because I, uh, uh... 1193 00:49:38,245 --> 00:49:41,114 - (chuckles) It's cool, it's cool, it's cool. 1194 00:49:41,248 --> 00:49:43,350 (clears throat) That's, uh... 1195 00:49:44,853 --> 00:49:48,989 I care about, I care, I care about that, too. 1196 00:49:51,191 --> 00:49:52,760 - I... 1197 00:49:52,894 --> 00:49:56,531 It's the, uh, only sticker I could find. 1198 00:49:58,198 --> 00:50:01,669 (distant Tims arguing) 1199 00:50:02,670 --> 00:50:03,838 - I love it. 1200 00:50:04,739 --> 00:50:08,141 (Gamma Tim chuckling) 1201 00:50:09,544 --> 00:50:10,845 - Blah. (chuckles) 1202 00:50:10,979 --> 00:50:13,815 (ominous music) 1203 00:50:17,852 --> 00:50:21,789 (machinery buzzing) (Tims chattering) 1204 00:50:21,923 --> 00:50:23,490 - Breathe, baby. 1205 00:50:23,625 --> 00:50:24,959 We're almost home. 1206 00:50:25,760 --> 00:50:26,895 Power core stable? 1207 00:50:27,662 --> 00:50:29,129 If not, we're gonna die! 1208 00:50:29,263 --> 00:50:30,732 Good enough. 1209 00:50:30,865 --> 00:50:32,499 - Is the second particle moving? 1210 00:50:32,634 --> 00:50:34,903 - Yeah, yeah. Full speed in a few seconds. 1211 00:50:35,035 --> 00:50:36,771 (electricity crackling) (Lambda Tim sniffing) 1212 00:50:36,905 --> 00:50:38,940 - [Lambda Tim] Hey, hey, do you smell something burning? 1213 00:50:39,072 --> 00:50:41,041 Eh, it's probably my imagination. 1214 00:50:41,174 --> 00:50:44,012 (electrical energy pulsating) 1215 00:50:44,144 --> 00:50:48,148 - Iota, I've got this. You go see the paradox. (chuckles) 1216 00:50:48,282 --> 00:50:52,754 - (chuckles) I owe you one. 1217 00:50:55,355 --> 00:50:59,092 (ominous music continues) 1218 00:50:59,226 --> 00:51:01,930 (Iota Tim panting) 1219 00:51:02,062 --> 00:51:04,331 (gun thuds) - Jesus fucking Christ! 1220 00:51:04,464 --> 00:51:06,834 (Iota Tim groans) (gun cocks) 1221 00:51:06,968 --> 00:51:08,068 What the hell? 1222 00:51:08,870 --> 00:51:11,906 (Iota Tim groans) 1223 00:51:13,073 --> 00:51:14,976 Okay. Let's be cool, man. 1224 00:51:15,108 --> 00:51:17,612 Whoa, whoa, whoa, please. - You said that already! 1225 00:51:18,345 --> 00:51:20,848 - When? - When I killed you! 1226 00:51:20,982 --> 00:51:22,082 Motherfucker. 1227 00:51:22,215 --> 00:51:24,418 And then I killed you at the coffee stand. 1228 00:51:24,552 --> 00:51:26,453 And then I was in the restaurant with that lady- 1229 00:51:26,588 --> 00:51:29,456 - Fucking Delilah. - And I killed you again. 1230 00:51:29,591 --> 00:51:31,626 - Oh, so, so you're the guy? 1231 00:51:31,759 --> 00:51:33,327 - I'm the guy. 1232 00:51:33,460 --> 00:51:34,662 And you... 1233 00:51:36,163 --> 00:51:37,431 What are you? 1234 00:51:40,568 --> 00:51:41,401 Are you 1235 00:51:41,536 --> 00:51:43,504 a god? 1236 00:51:43,638 --> 00:51:45,873 - Well, metaphorically, everyone's a God, 1237 00:51:46,007 --> 00:51:47,274 from their own perspective, so- 1238 00:51:47,407 --> 00:51:49,677 - Literally! Are you a god? 1239 00:51:49,811 --> 00:51:51,079 - No, no! No, not a god. 1240 00:51:51,211 --> 00:51:53,081 Not a god. Not yet! 1241 00:51:53,213 --> 00:51:54,414 (electricity crackling) 1242 00:51:54,549 --> 00:51:57,085 - Behind that door lies our future! 1243 00:51:57,217 --> 00:51:58,920 - Or present, technically. 1244 00:51:59,053 --> 00:52:00,120 - What? Whatever! 1245 00:52:02,557 --> 00:52:05,425 The paradox is within our ability to understand. 1246 00:52:07,494 --> 00:52:08,796 To control. 1247 00:52:08,930 --> 00:52:10,865 Now, at long last- 1248 00:52:10,999 --> 00:52:12,232 - Oh, my God! get on with it already! 1249 00:52:12,366 --> 00:52:15,603 - I was, you dingus! (metal clanging) 1250 00:52:15,737 --> 00:52:19,007 Now, at long last... 1251 00:52:19,139 --> 00:52:21,542 Let's go unmake history. 1252 00:52:22,543 --> 00:52:25,647 (suspenseful music) 1253 00:52:26,380 --> 00:52:31,052 (button thumps) (electricity crackling) 1254 00:52:31,184 --> 00:52:33,621 (explosions thumping) 1255 00:52:33,755 --> 00:52:34,922 - Oh, shit. 1256 00:52:35,056 --> 00:52:37,424 (explosions roaring) (Tims screaming) 1257 00:52:37,558 --> 00:52:39,127 - [Tim] Oh, shit! 1258 00:52:40,494 --> 00:52:42,897 (explosions thumping) 1259 00:52:43,031 --> 00:52:44,197 - Fuck, fuck! 1260 00:52:44,331 --> 00:52:45,867 Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! 1261 00:52:46,000 --> 00:52:47,969 (explosions thumping) 1262 00:52:48,102 --> 00:52:53,306 (Tims yelling) (explosions roaring) 1263 00:52:53,574 --> 00:52:56,678 (body thumps) 1264 00:52:56,811 --> 00:52:58,780 - [Tim] Oh, shit! It's gonna go insane! 1265 00:52:58,913 --> 00:53:02,050 (Tims yelling) 1266 00:53:02,182 --> 00:53:05,019 (siren blares) 1267 00:53:07,088 --> 00:53:07,889 - Oh, my... 1268 00:53:08,022 --> 00:53:10,158 (Tim and Helter grunting) 1269 00:53:10,323 --> 00:53:13,094 (guns clanging) (Tim groans) 1270 00:53:13,226 --> 00:53:14,227 (gun fires) 1271 00:53:14,361 --> 00:53:15,697 - Oh, wow! 1272 00:53:15,830 --> 00:53:19,133 (Tims grunting) 1273 00:53:19,266 --> 00:53:21,936 - Don't worry! I'll help you! 1274 00:53:23,604 --> 00:53:24,839 (flames roaring) 1275 00:53:24,972 --> 00:53:27,141 (Tim screaming) 1276 00:53:27,274 --> 00:53:30,044 (Tims yelling) 1277 00:53:31,546 --> 00:53:33,848 (Tim and Helter grunting) 1278 00:53:33,981 --> 00:53:35,482 (Helter grunts) - Come on! 1279 00:53:35,616 --> 00:53:39,319 (gun cocks) (Helter pants) 1280 00:53:39,453 --> 00:53:40,487 (Helter grunts) 1281 00:53:40,621 --> 00:53:41,488 - Wait! Wait, wait, wait, wait! 1282 00:53:41,622 --> 00:53:42,724 (gun fires) 1283 00:53:42,857 --> 00:53:44,625 (Helter pants) 1284 00:53:44,759 --> 00:53:50,064 (explosion roars) (ominous music continues) 1285 00:53:54,769 --> 00:53:58,472 (ominous music continues) 1286 00:54:01,341 --> 00:54:05,412 (explosion roars) (glass shatters) 1287 00:54:05,546 --> 00:54:08,381 (wind whistles) 1288 00:54:09,416 --> 00:54:11,919 (embers sizzling) 1289 00:54:12,053 --> 00:54:15,690 (hamster wheel scraping) 1290 00:54:17,925 --> 00:54:21,461 (electricity crackling) 1291 00:54:22,997 --> 00:54:25,432 (Delta Tim screaming) 1292 00:54:25,566 --> 00:54:27,267 - [Delta Tim] I'm still on fire! (screams) 1293 00:54:27,400 --> 00:54:32,540 Put me out, put me out, put me out! (screams) 1294 00:54:32,673 --> 00:54:35,877 (Gamma Tim panting) 1295 00:54:41,082 --> 00:54:45,186 (distant light bulbs buzzing) 1296 00:54:46,087 --> 00:54:48,856 (somber music) 1297 00:54:53,661 --> 00:54:54,929 - I, I, uh... 1298 00:54:59,000 --> 00:55:00,001 Help? 1299 00:55:02,003 --> 00:55:05,673 (somber music continues) 1300 00:55:08,743 --> 00:55:09,744 That did 1301 00:55:11,378 --> 00:55:12,345 not go 1302 00:55:13,781 --> 00:55:14,916 great. 1303 00:55:15,049 --> 00:55:16,784 - Just take it, take it easy, okay? 1304 00:55:16,918 --> 00:55:18,219 That's, um... 1305 00:55:18,351 --> 00:55:23,090 That's gonna be bitch a to patch up. (chuckles) 1306 00:55:23,224 --> 00:55:24,357 But you're gonna be all right. You're gonna be all right. 1307 00:55:24,491 --> 00:55:25,458 I just need... 1308 00:55:26,160 --> 00:55:27,595 We just need to think. 1309 00:55:30,497 --> 00:55:35,770 I just, I just need to think. Um... 1310 00:55:38,539 --> 00:55:41,642 I, I, I don't, I don't know... 1311 00:55:41,776 --> 00:55:42,844 I'm sorry. 1312 00:55:44,946 --> 00:55:48,216 (somber music continues) 1313 00:55:48,348 --> 00:55:49,517 - It's okay. 1314 00:55:50,218 --> 00:55:51,351 It's okay. 1315 00:55:55,089 --> 00:55:57,158 Just hang out with me for a minute. 1316 00:55:59,426 --> 00:56:00,393 Please. 1317 00:56:01,494 --> 00:56:03,264 - Okay. (sniffles) 1318 00:56:03,396 --> 00:56:04,431 Okay. 1319 00:56:06,033 --> 00:56:07,301 Just one minute. That's all you get. 1320 00:56:07,434 --> 00:56:11,572 (Omicron Tim chuckling and gagging) 1321 00:56:11,706 --> 00:56:14,609 - I wish there was a multiverse. 1322 00:56:17,211 --> 00:56:19,379 So that I could be the, 1323 00:56:20,948 --> 00:56:24,819 the version of me that was brave enough to, 1324 00:56:25,586 --> 00:56:27,387 to tell you that... 1325 00:56:31,726 --> 00:56:35,296 (somber music continues) 1326 00:56:40,433 --> 00:56:42,970 (somber music continues) 1327 00:56:43,104 --> 00:56:46,073 - [Delta Tim] (screaming) I'm still on fire! 1328 00:56:46,207 --> 00:56:50,177 (fire extinguisher hissing) 1329 00:56:50,311 --> 00:56:54,181 (somber music continues) 1330 00:56:54,315 --> 00:56:57,518 Thank you. (sighs) - You're welcome. 1331 00:56:57,652 --> 00:57:00,655 (Tims chattering) 1332 00:57:02,256 --> 00:57:04,759 (phone rings) 1333 00:57:04,892 --> 00:57:07,427 (Helter grunts) (phone rings) 1334 00:57:07,561 --> 00:57:08,529 - Helter? - King! 1335 00:57:08,663 --> 00:57:10,398 He made a sky beam. 1336 00:57:10,531 --> 00:57:14,201 A Marvel fucking sky beam! 1337 00:57:14,335 --> 00:57:15,703 Send in Royce! 1338 00:57:15,836 --> 00:57:19,573 - [Kingmaker] He's already on his way. (chuckles) 1339 00:57:19,707 --> 00:57:22,576 - [Omega Tim] (sighs) Power's down. Reactor's down. 1340 00:57:22,710 --> 00:57:26,247 Four Tims are dead. The accelerator's still working. 1341 00:57:26,380 --> 00:57:29,350 But, uh, Iota is still missing. 1342 00:57:30,217 --> 00:57:32,053 It's a three-ring shit-show. 1343 00:57:32,853 --> 00:57:33,888 Fuck me. 1344 00:57:34,021 --> 00:57:35,156 - [Delta Tim] Um... 1345 00:57:35,823 --> 00:57:37,725 Why can we still see through it? 1346 00:57:43,030 --> 00:57:46,867 - 'Cause in the future, we get it working again 1347 00:57:48,569 --> 00:57:53,040 and send the energy backwards, just like the matter. 1348 00:57:55,443 --> 00:57:57,178 (Tim chuckles) 1349 00:57:57,311 --> 00:57:59,447 This has only been a minor setback. 1350 00:58:00,881 --> 00:58:03,317 - Enough! - Huh? 1351 00:58:03,451 --> 00:58:04,585 - [Omega Tim] What? 1352 00:58:04,719 --> 00:58:06,454 - I said, enough! 1353 00:58:06,587 --> 00:58:08,488 I am done. I am, I am out! 1354 00:58:08,622 --> 00:58:10,758 Everything has gotten too, too confusing and too, 1355 00:58:10,891 --> 00:58:12,660 too painful, too... 1356 00:58:15,963 --> 00:58:16,964 Too sad. 1357 00:58:19,066 --> 00:58:19,867 That's it. 1358 00:58:20,001 --> 00:58:21,202 I'm, I'm, I'm out. 1359 00:58:21,335 --> 00:58:24,071 - You can't leave. You are Tim Travers! 1360 00:58:25,373 --> 00:58:27,575 - Well, at least I'm not you! 1361 00:58:28,309 --> 00:58:30,978 - We are all you! 1362 00:58:31,112 --> 00:58:32,847 Separated by a few hours. 1363 00:58:33,514 --> 00:58:35,983 (Gamma Tim chuckles) 1364 00:58:36,117 --> 00:58:39,320 - Sometimes, a few hours can change a person. 1365 00:58:43,758 --> 00:58:47,228 (brooding synth music) 1366 00:58:52,266 --> 00:58:56,505 (machine humming and crackling) 1367 00:59:01,175 --> 00:59:05,579 (brooding synth music continues) 1368 00:59:10,651 --> 00:59:11,685 - [Zeta Tim] Delta! 1369 00:59:11,819 --> 00:59:13,120 Got your coffee, Delta. 1370 00:59:13,754 --> 00:59:16,290 (coffee splashes) (Delta Tim yelps) 1371 00:59:16,424 --> 00:59:18,059 Keep up with the good work, bud. 1372 00:59:18,192 --> 00:59:18,959 (Tim groaning) 1373 00:59:19,093 --> 00:59:20,995 And it's the left clamp. 1374 00:59:21,128 --> 00:59:24,765 (door clunks) (Tim groaning) 1375 00:59:24,899 --> 00:59:27,468 May I have the wrench from you? The wrench. 1376 00:59:27,601 --> 00:59:29,170 The wrench! - Ow! 1377 00:59:31,038 --> 00:59:32,507 - And up! - Woo! 1378 00:59:35,176 --> 00:59:39,480 (brooding synth music continues) 1379 00:59:43,984 --> 00:59:48,322 (brooding synth music continues) 1380 00:59:52,860 --> 00:59:57,198 (brooding synth music continues) 1381 01:00:01,769 --> 01:00:05,005 (brooding synth music continues) 1382 01:00:05,139 --> 01:00:07,675 - I'm where you said to meet. 1383 01:00:08,342 --> 01:00:12,413 He's supposed to be the frickin' expert, man! 1384 01:00:15,816 --> 01:00:17,685 (ominous music) 1385 01:00:17,818 --> 01:00:22,990 Whoa! 1386 01:00:26,561 --> 01:00:30,231 (ominous music continues) 1387 01:00:31,332 --> 01:00:34,168 (goon chuckles) 1388 01:00:35,202 --> 01:00:36,203 - Kingmaker? 1389 01:00:38,873 --> 01:00:39,940 Yo, King! 1390 01:00:41,842 --> 01:00:43,578 Yeah, yeah. I know, I know. (chuckles) 1391 01:00:43,711 --> 01:00:45,913 Disrespectful, incompetent. 1392 01:00:46,046 --> 01:00:47,214 Yada, yada, yada, I know. 1393 01:00:47,348 --> 01:00:49,216 - He's talking about Travers, right? 1394 01:00:49,350 --> 01:00:50,384 (goons chuckling) 1395 01:00:50,519 --> 01:00:52,186 - Hey, it's no problem. 1396 01:00:52,319 --> 01:00:54,889 Yeah, I tell you what I'm gonna do. 1397 01:00:55,022 --> 01:00:58,826 I'm gonna cut his dick off, and feed it to him. 1398 01:00:58,959 --> 01:01:03,464 I'll send you pics when I'm done, all right? (chuckles) 1399 01:01:03,598 --> 01:01:05,799 - There's more than one of him, or he might be immortal. 1400 01:01:05,933 --> 01:01:08,836 He might be a god, man! - Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. 1401 01:01:08,969 --> 01:01:10,337 Hey, hey. 1402 01:01:10,471 --> 01:01:11,472 Relax. 1403 01:01:12,406 --> 01:01:13,908 A few kills under your belt, 1404 01:01:14,041 --> 01:01:17,378 and you think it's gonna be smooth sailin'. 1405 01:01:17,512 --> 01:01:18,513 Then... 1406 01:01:19,480 --> 01:01:20,781 The guilt sets in. 1407 01:01:21,616 --> 01:01:22,883 Can't shoot guilt! 1408 01:01:23,017 --> 01:01:25,853 So, you start seein' things that aren't there. 1409 01:01:28,322 --> 01:01:29,690 Burnout is real. 1410 01:01:30,457 --> 01:01:31,458 Right, fellas? 1411 01:01:32,426 --> 01:01:34,428 - I swear to you, I am not crazy. 1412 01:01:34,563 --> 01:01:37,898 - Don't worry about it, okay? We believe you. 1413 01:01:39,266 --> 01:01:40,434 (goons chuckling) 1414 01:01:40,569 --> 01:01:41,902 In fact, you know what I'll let you do? 1415 01:01:42,036 --> 01:01:43,971 I'll even let you watch. Would you like that? 1416 01:01:45,607 --> 01:01:48,543 - I would like that very much, please. Thank you. 1417 01:01:48,677 --> 01:01:50,512 (ominous music) (goons chuckling) 1418 01:01:50,645 --> 01:01:52,581 - Let's try this again. 1419 01:01:55,382 --> 01:01:56,585 (lever clunks) 1420 01:01:56,717 --> 01:02:01,822 (electricity crackling) (ominous music) 1421 01:02:03,558 --> 01:02:08,729 - [Tim] Very impressive! 1422 01:02:08,896 --> 01:02:10,064 (Tim grunting) 1423 01:02:10,197 --> 01:02:15,336 (Tims chattering) (ominous music continues) 1424 01:02:18,540 --> 01:02:20,040 - Need more power! 1425 01:02:20,174 --> 01:02:21,875 Ready transition to the grid! 1426 01:02:22,009 --> 01:02:24,078 - Oh, fuck you, man! 1427 01:02:24,211 --> 01:02:26,080 - Faster! 1428 01:02:26,213 --> 01:02:29,149 (Delta Tim screaming) 1429 01:02:29,283 --> 01:02:31,352 (Delta Tim groaning) 1430 01:02:31,485 --> 01:02:33,454 (Delta Tim panting) 1431 01:02:33,588 --> 01:02:36,691 (people screaming) 1432 01:02:38,826 --> 01:02:40,494 - (sighs) Idiots. 1433 01:02:40,629 --> 01:02:43,430 - For the last time, Carol. I'm not going to harm myself! 1434 01:02:43,565 --> 01:02:45,799 It was a different Delilah! 1435 01:02:46,967 --> 01:02:48,802 (sighs) Who I killed. 1436 01:02:51,839 --> 01:02:53,007 (eerie music) 1437 01:02:53,140 --> 01:02:54,074 (Delilah sighs) 1438 01:02:54,208 --> 01:02:55,710 Fuck Tim Travers. 1439 01:02:55,843 --> 01:02:57,278 (muffled chatter from phone) 1440 01:02:57,411 --> 01:02:59,146 No, I don't mean sexually! 1441 01:03:00,214 --> 01:03:03,685 (brooding synth music) 1442 01:03:04,885 --> 01:03:07,187 - As I said. 1443 01:03:07,321 --> 01:03:10,858 Behind that door lies our future! 1444 01:03:11,992 --> 01:03:13,927 It's like Mom always used to say. 1445 01:03:14,061 --> 01:03:15,496 "You're not a great person, Tim. 1446 01:03:15,630 --> 01:03:16,864 Hell, you're not even a very good person. 1447 01:03:16,997 --> 01:03:21,135 But what you are is a great scientist!" 1448 01:03:21,268 --> 01:03:23,370 No matter how strange or bizarre, 1449 01:03:23,505 --> 01:03:26,173 we, we follow the evidence. 1450 01:03:26,307 --> 01:03:29,376 Mortal laws no longer apply to us, and in a few seconds, 1451 01:03:29,511 --> 01:03:32,179 even the laws of nature won't apply anymore! 1452 01:03:32,980 --> 01:03:35,550 And I know that you know I know that 1453 01:03:35,684 --> 01:03:38,586 because you know I know that you know! 1454 01:03:40,387 --> 01:03:42,222 (Zeta Tim chuckles) 1455 01:03:42,356 --> 01:03:43,390 Come along. 1456 01:03:44,425 --> 01:03:46,093 Let's go unmake history. 1457 01:03:50,130 --> 01:03:51,398 (brooding synth music continues) 1458 01:03:51,533 --> 01:03:53,601 (Beta Tim sighs) 1459 01:03:53,735 --> 01:03:55,869 Holy shit! Oh, oh! 1460 01:03:56,003 --> 01:03:57,505 Fuck! 1461 01:03:57,639 --> 01:03:58,573 No, hey! 1462 01:04:02,843 --> 01:04:04,478 Holy fuck. We blew up the universe. 1463 01:04:04,612 --> 01:04:06,213 - We can't have destroyed it! - Then where is it? 1464 01:04:06,347 --> 01:04:08,282 - Gone! - That is impossible. 1465 01:04:08,415 --> 01:04:09,917 - [Zeta Tim] Help me! 1466 01:04:10,050 --> 01:04:11,385 - What the fuck about this day has led you to believe 1467 01:04:11,519 --> 01:04:12,787 that anything could be impossible? 1468 01:04:12,920 --> 01:04:14,154 - [Omega Tim] If the universe were gone, 1469 01:04:14,288 --> 01:04:15,724 then its laws should be gone, too. 1470 01:04:15,856 --> 01:04:16,890 - Why are you talking about this right now? 1471 01:04:17,024 --> 01:04:18,593 - Gravity is still in play. 1472 01:04:18,727 --> 01:04:19,594 Where is that coming from, if there's no more universe? 1473 01:04:19,728 --> 01:04:20,795 - Hey, he's right! 1474 01:04:20,928 --> 01:04:22,129 - What ar you? Okay, he's right! 1475 01:04:22,262 --> 01:04:23,897 Pull me up! What the fuck? 1476 01:04:24,031 --> 01:04:25,199 - Who cares where it's coming from if there's no more Earth? 1477 01:04:25,332 --> 01:04:26,534 - I do! 1478 01:04:26,668 --> 01:04:29,937 (foot stomps) - You bastard! 1479 01:04:30,070 --> 01:04:31,606 - You just killed Zeta Tim. 1480 01:04:31,740 --> 01:04:35,677 - Well, yeah, but I mean, he was creeping everybody out. 1481 01:04:35,810 --> 01:04:36,778 Right? 1482 01:04:40,247 --> 01:04:42,049 (footsteps clomping) 1483 01:04:42,182 --> 01:04:44,184 - [Tim] Bad, bad. Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. 1484 01:04:44,318 --> 01:04:46,353 (Tims yelling) 1485 01:04:46,487 --> 01:04:47,955 - That's, that's it? That's the paradox? 1486 01:04:48,088 --> 01:04:50,859 Just an unending black room? 1487 01:04:50,991 --> 01:04:51,959 - Maybe. 1488 01:04:54,261 --> 01:04:57,197 (lighter flicks) 1489 01:05:01,435 --> 01:05:02,436 But I think not. 1490 01:05:03,303 --> 01:05:05,005 Now, stay with me on this. 1491 01:05:05,139 --> 01:05:07,207 Imagine the, uh, two conflicting timelines 1492 01:05:07,341 --> 01:05:09,309 are more like differently charged particles. 1493 01:05:09,443 --> 01:05:10,277 - But why would they do that? 1494 01:05:10,411 --> 01:05:11,679 - I said, "Stay with me." 1495 01:05:11,813 --> 01:05:13,180 Now, the paradox brings the two 1496 01:05:13,313 --> 01:05:14,948 differently charged timelines together, 1497 01:05:15,082 --> 01:05:16,917 destroying both and removing the conflicting information. 1498 01:05:17,050 --> 01:05:18,452 - The only place that information 1499 01:05:18,586 --> 01:05:19,888 can be destroyed is a singularity. 1500 01:05:20,020 --> 01:05:21,321 - Exactly! 1501 01:05:21,455 --> 01:05:23,957 Black holes reduce information to max entropy, 1502 01:05:24,091 --> 01:05:27,494 which means that the natural response in nature 1503 01:05:27,629 --> 01:05:30,364 to a paradox is a black hole. 1504 01:05:30,497 --> 01:05:32,332 - So, we didn't destroy the universe! 1505 01:05:32,466 --> 01:05:35,269 We just created a black hole in that timeline that 1506 01:05:36,638 --> 01:05:40,407 destroyed the Earth and, and killed everyone that we know. 1507 01:05:40,542 --> 01:05:41,509 - Oh, boy. 1508 01:05:42,309 --> 01:05:43,611 - Hold on, hold on. 1509 01:05:43,745 --> 01:05:45,279 If we created a black hole in that timeline, 1510 01:05:45,412 --> 01:05:46,346 then how come Zeta Tim, when we dropped him in, 1511 01:05:46,480 --> 01:05:47,782 could still breathe? 1512 01:05:47,916 --> 01:05:49,416 - Fuck off! I don't know everything, Sigma! 1513 01:05:49,551 --> 01:05:51,118 I mean, this week, I entangled and stored particles 1514 01:05:51,251 --> 01:05:52,720 matched them to the physical space of a door, 1515 01:05:52,854 --> 01:05:54,354 invented fucking time travel, 1516 01:05:54,488 --> 01:05:56,724 and may have just found a new way to create black holes! 1517 01:05:56,858 --> 01:05:59,259 So, cut me some fucking slack! 1518 01:05:59,393 --> 01:06:02,429 - (sighs) I mean, maybe, if you were able to cheat your way 1519 01:06:02,564 --> 01:06:05,332 past the spaghettification of an, of an event horizon, 1520 01:06:05,466 --> 01:06:07,501 then you would be moving faster than the speed of light 1521 01:06:07,635 --> 01:06:10,003 and frozen in time, relative to the universe. 1522 01:06:10,137 --> 01:06:12,973 But you would continue to perceive the passage of time 1523 01:06:13,106 --> 01:06:17,244 as an illusion and just stay in that state forever, maybe! 1524 01:06:17,377 --> 01:06:22,584 - So, Zeta Tim will be falling through the void, 1525 01:06:23,885 --> 01:06:29,022 without aging or dying, literally forever? 1526 01:06:29,289 --> 01:06:30,792 - Well, shit. Now I feel bad. 1527 01:06:30,925 --> 01:06:32,259 - An important safety tip. 1528 01:06:32,392 --> 01:06:35,162 Nobody ever go the, the other way through. 1529 01:06:35,295 --> 01:06:38,666 (door motor whirring) 1530 01:06:41,703 --> 01:06:45,807 - Makes sense to me! (chuckling) 1531 01:06:45,940 --> 01:06:46,975 See, kid? 1532 01:06:48,342 --> 01:06:49,476 Not magic. 1533 01:06:50,377 --> 01:06:51,378 Just power. 1534 01:06:51,513 --> 01:06:53,581 - Sorry, but who the hell are... 1535 01:06:53,715 --> 01:06:54,849 (Tims yelping) 1536 01:06:54,983 --> 01:06:55,817 - Oh! 1537 01:06:55,950 --> 01:06:56,818 - Yeah! 1538 01:06:56,951 --> 01:07:00,220 Nice work. (chuckles) 1539 01:07:00,354 --> 01:07:04,959 Arthritis sets in, you gotta start delegating, 1540 01:07:05,125 --> 01:07:06,326 you know, as you get older. 1541 01:07:06,460 --> 01:07:07,795 - If I may, uh... 1542 01:07:07,929 --> 01:07:09,931 Is this all about the stolen plutonium? 1543 01:07:10,063 --> 01:07:13,200 - Yeah. It's about the plutonium. 1544 01:07:13,333 --> 01:07:16,638 How the hell do you forget about plutonium? 1545 01:07:16,771 --> 01:07:18,272 - Oh, that I stole. 1546 01:07:18,940 --> 01:07:22,075 - It's been a weird day. - Weird, confusing. 1547 01:07:22,944 --> 01:07:24,411 Really, really stupid. 1548 01:07:25,045 --> 01:07:29,483 Although, it's about to get stupider! 1549 01:07:29,617 --> 01:07:32,620 (energy rumbling) 1550 01:07:33,655 --> 01:07:35,723 - [Light Figure] Arrogant mortals! 1551 01:07:35,857 --> 01:07:37,491 You're tampering with the very programming 1552 01:07:37,625 --> 01:07:38,726 of reality itself! 1553 01:07:38,860 --> 01:07:40,327 - Holo-Universe. Fuckin' called it. 1554 01:07:40,460 --> 01:07:42,564 - Shut the fuck up! - Who the fuck are you? 1555 01:07:42,697 --> 01:07:44,064 - Good question. 1556 01:07:44,197 --> 01:07:45,533 - [Light Figure] Who the fuck do you think I am? 1557 01:07:45,667 --> 01:07:47,501 I'm God, you miserable little shits! 1558 01:07:47,635 --> 01:07:48,903 - Now, that's it. I'm done. 1559 01:07:49,037 --> 01:07:52,072 If God actually exists, then I'm out. 1560 01:07:52,205 --> 01:07:53,775 Later, everybody. 1561 01:07:55,442 --> 01:07:57,077 (Alpha Tim whistling) 1562 01:07:57,210 --> 01:08:00,247 - Hey! Did you just let that guy leave? 1563 01:08:00,380 --> 01:08:02,382 - I don't understand what's happening right now! 1564 01:08:02,517 --> 01:08:04,117 - Me neither. Uh... 1565 01:08:04,251 --> 01:08:07,454 When you say God, do you mean like, like a god or God, God? 1566 01:08:07,589 --> 01:08:09,189 You know? I just, I have some follow-up questions. 1567 01:08:09,323 --> 01:08:11,091 To the statement, "I am God." (chuckles) 1568 01:08:11,224 --> 01:08:15,830 - And I think you're full of shit! (chuckles) 1569 01:08:15,964 --> 01:08:17,765 (flesh squelches) 1570 01:08:23,170 --> 01:08:26,306 (suspenseful music) 1571 01:08:26,440 --> 01:08:28,475 - Just to be clear... 1572 01:08:29,276 --> 01:08:31,846 He did not speak for the group. 1573 01:08:31,980 --> 01:08:33,514 (Helter yelps) 1574 01:08:33,648 --> 01:08:34,348 - You idiot! 1575 01:08:34,481 --> 01:08:37,018 (gun fires) 1576 01:08:40,454 --> 01:08:43,858 (warm ethereal music) 1577 01:08:46,594 --> 01:08:49,964 Hey! I dunno what's gonna happen now! 1578 01:08:51,065 --> 01:08:52,466 - What are you? 1579 01:08:52,600 --> 01:08:54,167 - Thought I told you. 1580 01:08:54,301 --> 01:08:58,973 I'm the Alpha and Omega that's about to own your bitch ass. 1581 01:08:59,107 --> 01:09:05,046 (flesh squelches) 1582 01:09:07,414 --> 01:09:09,784 - Oh, you son of a fuck... 1583 01:09:10,417 --> 01:09:11,485 - Yeah! - Woo! 1584 01:09:11,619 --> 01:09:12,954 - [God Tim] Shut up! 1585 01:09:13,087 --> 01:09:14,889 Forgot how annoying I am. 1586 01:09:15,023 --> 01:09:15,923 - Sorry. Um... 1587 01:09:16,057 --> 01:09:17,290 "I"? 1588 01:09:17,424 --> 01:09:18,793 (flesh squelches) 1589 01:09:18,926 --> 01:09:21,428 (warm ethereal music continues) 1590 01:09:21,562 --> 01:09:24,164 - Do you know what it's like to fall forever? 1591 01:09:25,332 --> 01:09:27,568 Unable to starve, unable to die. 1592 01:09:27,702 --> 01:09:29,037 You go mad! 1593 01:09:29,169 --> 01:09:31,773 You begin to create new realities in your mind, 1594 01:09:31,906 --> 01:09:34,307 so as to not be so completely alone. 1595 01:09:36,077 --> 01:09:37,912 You refine and perfect each iteration, 1596 01:09:38,046 --> 01:09:40,180 until you can run a simulation so flawless 1597 01:09:40,313 --> 01:09:41,949 that from the frame of the beings within, 1598 01:09:42,083 --> 01:09:43,250 the difference between their reality 1599 01:09:43,383 --> 01:09:45,720 and a physical one is semantics. 1600 01:09:47,220 --> 01:09:48,890 And you do it over and over, 1601 01:09:49,824 --> 01:09:51,092 until a perfect recreation 1602 01:09:51,224 --> 01:09:53,661 of your original reality can be constructed. 1603 01:09:54,996 --> 01:09:56,130 That 1604 01:09:56,263 --> 01:09:59,567 is how you achieve God-hood, bitches. 1605 01:09:59,701 --> 01:10:03,336 - So, the universe is just a simulated reality in your head? 1606 01:10:03,470 --> 01:10:04,739 - Yes. 1607 01:10:04,872 --> 01:10:05,740 - Based on the reality that you originated from? 1608 01:10:05,873 --> 01:10:07,207 - Yes! 1609 01:10:07,340 --> 01:10:08,776 - A reality in which you were the Zeta Tim that we... 1610 01:10:08,910 --> 01:10:12,513 Sorry. He dropped into a black hole? 1611 01:10:12,647 --> 01:10:13,380 - Yes. 1612 01:10:13,514 --> 01:10:14,749 - Dude! 1613 01:10:14,882 --> 01:10:16,718 - I created this universe for the sole purpose 1614 01:10:16,851 --> 01:10:18,586 of arriving at this very moment. 1615 01:10:18,720 --> 01:10:21,723 - To tell us that you love and forgive us? 1616 01:10:22,523 --> 01:10:25,358 (God Tim chuckles) 1617 01:10:25,492 --> 01:10:26,426 - No. 1618 01:10:28,261 --> 01:10:30,230 (Omega Tim pops) 1619 01:10:30,363 --> 01:10:31,999 (Pi Tim pops) 1620 01:10:32,133 --> 01:10:34,135 (Chi Tim pops) 1621 01:10:34,267 --> 01:10:37,205 - (groans) Fuckin' why? 1622 01:10:37,337 --> 01:10:40,440 (Epsilon Tim pops) 1623 01:10:41,642 --> 01:10:42,977 - Come on. 1624 01:10:43,111 --> 01:10:45,747 (Rho Tim pops) 1625 01:10:46,547 --> 01:10:48,482 - [James] It starts with the cause. We will stop- 1626 01:10:48,616 --> 01:10:49,784 - Weren't you just- 1627 01:10:50,484 --> 01:10:53,054 - Yeah. I just got one of those faces. 1628 01:10:53,187 --> 01:10:54,589 I know. 1629 01:10:54,722 --> 01:10:56,724 You would not believe the weird shit I have seen today. 1630 01:10:56,858 --> 01:10:58,025 (Tim chuckles) 1631 01:10:58,159 --> 01:10:59,627 - [James] Illegal Canadians coming down- 1632 01:10:59,761 --> 01:11:02,663 - You buy me this drink, and I'll blow your mind. 1633 01:11:02,797 --> 01:11:04,565 - [James] As you know, they can't buy homes- 1634 01:11:04,699 --> 01:11:06,968 - Listen, I... (Alpha Tim creaking) 1635 01:11:07,101 --> 01:11:09,537 (Alpha Tim pops) (flesh splatters) 1636 01:11:09,670 --> 01:11:12,707 - [James] Live the American dream, but no, they are poor. 1637 01:11:12,840 --> 01:11:16,144 And, uh, you know, my heart goes out to 'em and my heart- 1638 01:11:16,276 --> 01:11:17,812 - Oh, man, that felt good! 1639 01:11:20,380 --> 01:11:21,481 Oh, yes. 1640 01:11:21,616 --> 01:11:24,252 Yes, yes, yes. Fuck yeah, fuck yeah! 1641 01:11:24,384 --> 01:11:28,022 Fuck yeah! (laughs) 1642 01:11:28,156 --> 01:11:29,524 Oh! 1643 01:11:29,657 --> 01:11:33,694 Ah. (sighs) 1644 01:11:35,730 --> 01:11:38,633 (chuckles) Of course, now I wonder... 1645 01:11:38,766 --> 01:11:40,300 (gun fires) 1646 01:11:40,433 --> 01:11:43,104 (body thumps) 1647 01:11:44,505 --> 01:11:45,506 - Hm. 1648 01:11:46,908 --> 01:11:47,842 Hm. 1649 01:11:48,810 --> 01:11:51,378 Yes, apparently it is possible to kill God. 1650 01:11:51,512 --> 01:11:52,713 Hm. 1651 01:11:52,847 --> 01:11:54,481 (electronic tones chirping) 1652 01:11:54,615 --> 01:11:57,852 (New God Tim sighs) 1653 01:12:01,756 --> 01:12:03,490 Still feel like I'm forgetting something. 1654 01:12:03,624 --> 01:12:06,961 (bartender screams) 1655 01:12:07,094 --> 01:12:08,729 - [James] They're always screaming at me. 1656 01:12:08,863 --> 01:12:11,532 I can't understand 'em. He's gotta do something about it. 1657 01:12:11,666 --> 01:12:14,068 - Can, can I get another one? Um... 1658 01:12:14,202 --> 01:12:16,070 (bartender screams) 1659 01:12:16,204 --> 01:12:17,305 Okay, look. 1660 01:12:18,806 --> 01:12:22,777 (muffled chatter from radio) 1661 01:12:23,845 --> 01:12:27,849 - (grunts) Travers. Travers! 1662 01:12:30,117 --> 01:12:31,853 - [Gamma Tim] Me? 1663 01:12:31,986 --> 01:12:33,688 - How could I forget something? 1664 01:12:33,821 --> 01:12:36,724 Omnipotence knows no exceptions! 1665 01:12:38,593 --> 01:12:42,063 Unless I didn't create this universe. 1666 01:12:42,196 --> 01:12:43,164 I... 1667 01:12:44,198 --> 01:12:45,800 I just hacked it. 1668 01:12:47,335 --> 01:12:49,537 Which would mean that... 1669 01:12:52,540 --> 01:12:53,708 I'm limited. 1670 01:12:56,344 --> 01:12:58,846 Just another meek little... 1671 01:13:00,281 --> 01:13:01,381 No, no, no! 1672 01:13:05,418 --> 01:13:06,587 Well, maybe. 1673 01:13:13,227 --> 01:13:14,328 Not for long. 1674 01:13:14,461 --> 01:13:17,832 (ominous synth music) 1675 01:13:18,766 --> 01:13:21,769 (machine rattling) 1676 01:13:21,903 --> 01:13:23,771 ♪ I'm not gone ♪ 1677 01:13:23,905 --> 01:13:25,606 - Do these look even? (bartender screams) 1678 01:13:25,740 --> 01:13:27,174 Oh! 1679 01:13:27,308 --> 01:13:29,310 Oh, that is really getting old. 1680 01:13:29,442 --> 01:13:32,580 (Gamma Tim groans) 1681 01:13:32,713 --> 01:13:34,115 (Royce chuckling) 1682 01:13:34,248 --> 01:13:35,883 So, um, about what we were talking about earlier. 1683 01:13:36,017 --> 01:13:38,286 - Hey, thank you. (chuckles) 1684 01:13:38,418 --> 01:13:39,720 - Okay, um... (clears throat) 1685 01:13:39,854 --> 01:13:41,522 So, so you and that Helter guy 1686 01:13:41,656 --> 01:13:43,456 were coming here to kill me because- 1687 01:13:43,591 --> 01:13:44,625 - Stolen reactor. 1688 01:13:44,759 --> 01:13:46,928 - Stolen reactor, right. (sighs) 1689 01:13:47,061 --> 01:13:48,329 I knew that radio show was a mistake. 1690 01:13:48,461 --> 01:13:51,065 But, but just so I'm clear, 1691 01:13:51,198 --> 01:13:53,134 you're not gonna kill me now? 1692 01:13:53,267 --> 01:13:54,467 - No. 1693 01:13:54,602 --> 01:13:57,204 You wanna know the secret to a long life? 1694 01:13:57,338 --> 01:13:59,240 Know your limitations. 1695 01:13:59,373 --> 01:14:03,844 The other you killed my men with his mind! 1696 01:14:04,477 --> 01:14:05,713 Look. I'm outta here. 1697 01:14:05,846 --> 01:14:08,616 I'm gonna go home, call my grandkids, 1698 01:14:08,749 --> 01:14:10,450 and tell 'em I love 'em. 1699 01:14:12,119 --> 01:14:13,888 - Wow! You... 1700 01:14:14,021 --> 01:14:15,389 You, you're married? 1701 01:14:16,290 --> 01:14:18,859 With, with kids and grandkids? That's amazing. 1702 01:14:18,993 --> 01:14:20,493 - The fuck's that supposed to mean? 1703 01:14:20,628 --> 01:14:22,462 - Didn't mean to offend, I... (Royce growls) 1704 01:14:22,596 --> 01:14:25,967 It's just that you're literally a professional murderer. 1705 01:14:26,100 --> 01:14:27,301 I mean, does your wife know about that? 1706 01:14:27,435 --> 01:14:30,237 - She thinks it's hot. (chuckles) 1707 01:14:30,371 --> 01:14:31,372 And it is. 1708 01:14:32,506 --> 01:14:33,473 - Well... 1709 01:14:34,308 --> 01:14:36,844 Good for you, and her. 1710 01:14:36,978 --> 01:14:38,679 - Mm. (Tim sighs) 1711 01:14:38,813 --> 01:14:41,983 - Some people are just meant for love. 1712 01:14:44,051 --> 01:14:46,153 Some aren't. - Ah, bullshit. 1713 01:14:46,287 --> 01:14:51,392 Abusers, rapists, drug dealers, murderers, politicians, 1714 01:14:51,525 --> 01:14:55,463 pricks on YouTubes, worst people imaginable, 1715 01:14:55,596 --> 01:14:57,732 most still find someone to love 'em 1716 01:14:57,865 --> 01:15:01,669 in spite of being worthless fuckin' garbage! 1717 01:15:01,802 --> 01:15:03,704 And that includes you. 1718 01:15:04,405 --> 01:15:06,507 Now, your problem is that you don't know 1719 01:15:06,640 --> 01:15:10,878 how to love yourself, and nobody can help you with that, 1720 01:15:12,380 --> 01:15:14,181 but you. 1721 01:15:16,217 --> 01:15:17,184 Ah! 1722 01:15:18,052 --> 01:15:19,453 - I loved myself, today. 1723 01:15:19,587 --> 01:15:23,024 - Look, I don't know what the fuck that means, 1724 01:15:23,858 --> 01:15:27,428 but I'll tell you, you wanna learn to love yourself, 1725 01:15:27,561 --> 01:15:32,666 you've gotta find the angriest, ugliest part of you 1726 01:15:33,100 --> 01:15:37,004 and show that son of a bitch they're beautiful. 1727 01:15:38,005 --> 01:15:39,508 (Tim chuckles) 1728 01:15:39,640 --> 01:15:42,009 - You must have to do that a lot. 1729 01:15:42,143 --> 01:15:43,444 - Screw you. 1730 01:15:45,579 --> 01:15:46,814 I'm beautiful. 1731 01:15:47,516 --> 01:15:50,651 You don't believe me, just ask my grandkids. 1732 01:15:50,785 --> 01:15:53,721 (both chuckling) 1733 01:15:57,224 --> 01:15:58,259 Where you goin'? 1734 01:15:59,827 --> 01:16:01,429 - Following your advice. 1735 01:16:01,562 --> 01:16:03,097 It's time to meet my maker. 1736 01:16:04,365 --> 01:16:07,601 - Hey, you try to talk to that guy and you're gonna die! 1737 01:16:09,804 --> 01:16:13,207 (brooding synth music) 1738 01:16:13,340 --> 01:16:15,109 - Wouldn't be the first time. (chuckles) 1739 01:16:15,242 --> 01:16:16,110 (bartender screams) Oh! 1740 01:16:16,243 --> 01:16:18,045 Come on! Get over it! 1741 01:16:19,213 --> 01:16:20,081 (Tim groans) 1742 01:16:20,214 --> 01:16:21,649 That's why I don't tip! 1743 01:16:23,117 --> 01:16:25,886 (brooding synth music continues) 1744 01:16:26,020 --> 01:16:28,022 What the hell is that? 1745 01:16:28,923 --> 01:16:31,725 (ominous music) 1746 01:16:31,859 --> 01:16:33,961 - Looks like a buildup of stacked singularities, 1747 01:16:34,095 --> 01:16:35,463 if you ask me. 1748 01:16:36,163 --> 01:16:37,231 - That's... 1749 01:16:38,432 --> 01:16:39,300 Yeah. 1750 01:16:39,433 --> 01:16:41,902 (buildings crumbling) Holy shit! 1751 01:16:42,036 --> 01:16:44,638 (buildings crumbling) 1752 01:16:44,772 --> 01:16:48,242 - And I think we know, say it out loud together, 1753 01:16:48,375 --> 01:16:49,977 who's starting these fires. 1754 01:16:50,778 --> 01:16:52,179 Illegal Canadians. 1755 01:16:53,080 --> 01:16:57,251 That's right, Illegal Canadians coming down from Canada 1756 01:16:57,384 --> 01:16:58,853 building themselves these fires, 1757 01:16:58,986 --> 01:17:01,556 because as you know, they can't buy a home. 1758 01:17:01,689 --> 01:17:04,526 (Royce speaks Spanish) 1759 01:17:04,658 --> 01:17:08,563 Look, go grab your mom, tell her you love her. 1760 01:17:08,696 --> 01:17:15,736 (Royce speaks Spanish) 1761 01:17:16,937 --> 01:17:19,574 - Oh, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. 1762 01:17:24,712 --> 01:17:25,713 Come on. Pick up, pick up! 1763 01:17:25,846 --> 01:17:27,748 (phone vibrates) (lighter flicks) 1764 01:17:27,882 --> 01:17:30,585 (phone vibrates) 1765 01:17:30,718 --> 01:17:31,986 - [Delilah] Hello? 1766 01:17:32,119 --> 01:17:33,387 - Hey, uh, Delilah? Yeah, it's, it's Tim. 1767 01:17:33,522 --> 01:17:35,557 The, uh, the, the time travel guy? 1768 01:17:35,689 --> 01:17:38,392 I, uh, I just wanted to say I'm sorry. 1769 01:17:38,527 --> 01:17:39,960 - Oh, this oughta be rich. 1770 01:17:40,094 --> 01:17:41,328 - I just wanted you to know that 1771 01:17:41,462 --> 01:17:43,864 we're clearly not going to be a thing, um... 1772 01:17:43,998 --> 01:17:45,199 - You seriously called to tell me that? 1773 01:17:45,332 --> 01:17:48,035 - And! And to apologize. 1774 01:17:48,169 --> 01:17:50,704 I know I saw a lot of ugly versions of myself today, 1775 01:17:50,838 --> 01:17:52,206 and I'm pretty sure you did, too! 1776 01:17:52,339 --> 01:17:53,707 So, I'm sorry things got so out of control, 1777 01:17:53,841 --> 01:17:54,842 and I'm sorry that I failed. 1778 01:17:54,975 --> 01:17:56,443 It's just something that I do. 1779 01:17:56,578 --> 01:17:59,581 I don't know why I do it. - Honestly, Tim, it's fine. 1780 01:17:59,713 --> 01:18:01,248 I mean, it was fucked up, 1781 01:18:01,382 --> 01:18:04,619 but there's a middle ground between hate and love and... 1782 01:18:05,319 --> 01:18:07,522 That's us. The middle people. 1783 01:18:08,255 --> 01:18:10,991 - Thanks. I'm gonna try and put all this back together. 1784 01:18:11,125 --> 01:18:12,493 - I thought you said you weren't gonna try 1785 01:18:12,627 --> 01:18:14,228 to make us a thing? 1786 01:18:14,361 --> 01:18:15,829 - [Gamma Tim] No, no, no. I meant the universe! (chuckles) 1787 01:18:15,963 --> 01:18:17,231 - What about it? 1788 01:18:17,364 --> 01:18:18,432 - Well, what do you mean, "What about it?" 1789 01:18:18,567 --> 01:18:19,934 Have you looked out your wi... 1790 01:18:21,101 --> 01:18:25,406 - Goodbye, Tim, and maybe try to be nicer to yourself. 1791 01:18:25,540 --> 01:18:26,840 Literally. 1792 01:18:26,974 --> 01:18:28,742 - Believe it or not, that is actually the idea. 1793 01:18:28,876 --> 01:18:31,745 (ominous music) 1794 01:18:35,182 --> 01:18:36,917 - [Delilah] Fuck. 1795 01:18:37,051 --> 01:18:41,455 - I love you, baby. (speaks foreign language) 1796 01:18:43,157 --> 01:18:44,858 (thunder claps) 1797 01:18:44,992 --> 01:18:46,827 - So, that's how Bigfoot does it. 1798 01:18:46,961 --> 01:18:50,231 (glass shatters) 1799 01:18:50,364 --> 01:18:51,498 (dog barks) 1800 01:18:51,633 --> 01:18:53,568 - I choose not to believe in that. 1801 01:18:58,640 --> 01:19:02,343 (ominous music continues) 1802 01:19:07,549 --> 01:19:11,252 (ominous music continues) 1803 01:19:14,822 --> 01:19:18,025 (suspenseful music) 1804 01:19:23,430 --> 01:19:27,535 (suspenseful music continues) 1805 01:19:30,605 --> 01:19:34,108 (suspenseful music continues) 1806 01:19:34,241 --> 01:19:35,744 - I remember you. 1807 01:19:36,777 --> 01:19:40,014 You're the one that said a few hours can change a person. 1808 01:19:40,715 --> 01:19:41,849 (God Tim chuckles) 1809 01:19:41,982 --> 01:19:45,720 Well, you have no idea how right you were. 1810 01:19:47,522 --> 01:19:50,224 Do you know what it's like to fall forever? 1811 01:19:51,025 --> 01:19:52,259 - Skip. 1812 01:19:52,393 --> 01:19:54,061 I know the universe is a creation in your head, 1813 01:19:54,194 --> 01:19:55,963 Russian nesting doll style, and that you're God. 1814 01:19:56,096 --> 01:19:57,064 Royce filled me in. 1815 01:19:57,197 --> 01:19:58,198 I figured out on the way over 1816 01:19:58,332 --> 01:19:59,534 that you couldn't actually be God 1817 01:19:59,668 --> 01:20:01,902 and must've just hacked the system. 1818 01:20:03,003 --> 01:20:06,940 (sighs) And judging by the unraveling, 1819 01:20:07,074 --> 01:20:08,442 I'm guessing you figured that out, too, 1820 01:20:08,576 --> 01:20:10,512 and you're not taking it very well. 1821 01:20:10,645 --> 01:20:15,382 - I'm unmaking this universe one paradox at a time, 1822 01:20:16,083 --> 01:20:19,987 mounting like gravity into a singular point 1823 01:20:21,221 --> 01:20:25,225 that will break the whole of creation. 1824 01:20:25,359 --> 01:20:26,695 - As one does. 1825 01:20:26,860 --> 01:20:28,195 - I even murdered the younger versions of us, 1826 01:20:28,329 --> 01:20:29,664 just to get warmed up. 1827 01:20:32,567 --> 01:20:33,967 - How did that go? 1828 01:20:34,101 --> 01:20:35,336 - Yeah. 1829 01:20:35,469 --> 01:20:39,239 Well, there was a lot of crying, but you know. 1830 01:20:39,373 --> 01:20:40,240 Children. 1831 01:20:40,374 --> 01:20:42,076 (Gamma Tim scoffs) 1832 01:20:42,209 --> 01:20:45,346 - Damn. Damn, dude, that, that is dark. 1833 01:20:45,479 --> 01:20:46,715 That... 1834 01:20:46,847 --> 01:20:47,782 I mean, I mean that is, that is fucked up. 1835 01:20:47,915 --> 01:20:48,849 Like, even for us. 1836 01:20:48,982 --> 01:20:51,653 - Well, tell that to Potato! 1837 01:20:52,920 --> 01:20:54,789 - Yeah. Yeah, yeah. 1838 01:20:54,922 --> 01:20:56,658 You know what? You're right! 1839 01:20:56,791 --> 01:20:59,893 You're right, and now that I'm, I'm thinking about it, 1840 01:21:00,027 --> 01:21:01,462 maybe the reason that we are so alone 1841 01:21:01,596 --> 01:21:04,699 is because we are all so fucking awful! 1842 01:21:06,400 --> 01:21:07,401 - That's us. 1843 01:21:08,335 --> 01:21:10,137 - (sighs) No. 1844 01:21:10,270 --> 01:21:12,373 no, no, no, no, no, no. That, that's me. 1845 01:21:12,507 --> 01:21:15,610 You are something else, entirely. 1846 01:21:15,744 --> 01:21:17,378 Like, I don't know what eternity did to you, 1847 01:21:17,512 --> 01:21:21,148 but whatever it is, it's ugly. 1848 01:21:21,281 --> 01:21:22,650 It's childish! 1849 01:21:22,784 --> 01:21:24,619 I may be the worst person in the world, but you, 1850 01:21:24,753 --> 01:21:29,691 you scared, small, whimpering glitch in the system, 1851 01:21:29,824 --> 01:21:32,092 you are the worst version of the worst guy 1852 01:21:32,226 --> 01:21:33,360 of all fucking time! 1853 01:21:33,494 --> 01:21:36,765 - Second to none, baby. (chuckles) 1854 01:21:37,532 --> 01:21:39,701 - So that's it. That's it? 1855 01:21:39,834 --> 01:21:41,435 You're just gonna burn it all down 1856 01:21:41,569 --> 01:21:43,937 until there's nothing left but a little whining child 1857 01:21:44,071 --> 01:21:46,273 having a temper tantrum because he's lonely? 1858 01:21:46,407 --> 01:21:47,542 - Burn, baby, burn! 1859 01:21:47,675 --> 01:21:49,309 - Is that really what you want? 1860 01:21:49,443 --> 01:21:54,749 (God Tim roars) (building crumbling) 1861 01:21:56,785 --> 01:22:00,087 (explosions roaring) 1862 01:22:05,259 --> 01:22:09,029 (brooding ethereal music) 1863 01:22:14,669 --> 01:22:19,306 (brooding ethereal music continues) 1864 01:22:22,610 --> 01:22:25,412 (Zeta Tim sobs) 1865 01:22:28,315 --> 01:22:29,349 - Are you okay? 1866 01:22:31,519 --> 01:22:33,353 - Yeah. (sniffles) Yeah, um... 1867 01:22:34,254 --> 01:22:37,257 (sighs) Sorry. That was literally building forever. 1868 01:22:37,391 --> 01:22:38,392 (Zeta Tim chuckles) 1869 01:22:38,526 --> 01:22:40,227 They left me in a black hole. 1870 01:22:42,564 --> 01:22:44,732 They left me alone, literally forever. 1871 01:22:45,466 --> 01:22:48,068 - Yeah, that wasn't cool. (sighs) 1872 01:22:48,202 --> 01:22:52,306 Not that it matters, but I wasn't a part of that, so... 1873 01:22:53,106 --> 01:22:55,042 - Guess that makes you the best of us. 1874 01:22:56,443 --> 01:22:57,712 - Grading on a curve. 1875 01:23:03,317 --> 01:23:04,351 What is that? 1876 01:23:06,788 --> 01:23:07,956 - Oh, that's the... 1877 01:23:08,088 --> 01:23:09,089 That's the center. 1878 01:23:09,924 --> 01:23:12,694 The universe never used to have a center, 1879 01:23:12,827 --> 01:23:14,596 but, but now that it's broken, 1880 01:23:15,663 --> 01:23:17,532 that's the center of what's left. 1881 01:23:23,972 --> 01:23:24,973 Please? 1882 01:23:27,274 --> 01:23:28,643 Let's find out together? 1883 01:23:30,043 --> 01:23:31,411 - Why not? 1884 01:23:31,546 --> 01:23:34,616 (Zeta Tim chuckles) 1885 01:23:34,749 --> 01:23:38,218 (dramatic synth music) 1886 01:23:43,625 --> 01:23:47,896 (dramatic synth music continues) 1887 01:23:52,432 --> 01:23:56,738 (dramatic synth music continues) 1888 01:24:01,275 --> 01:24:05,647 (dramatic synth music continues) 1889 01:24:10,183 --> 01:24:14,488 (dramatic synth music continues) 1890 01:24:19,059 --> 01:24:22,864 (gentle ethereal music) 1891 01:24:22,997 --> 01:24:23,998 - And you are? 1892 01:24:24,131 --> 01:24:25,967 - [Simulator] I am that I am. 1893 01:24:26,099 --> 01:24:29,871 I am that which decided that one plus one would equal two, 1894 01:24:30,004 --> 01:24:31,204 that structured the graviton. 1895 01:24:31,338 --> 01:24:33,942 I am the simulator of your universe. 1896 01:24:34,074 --> 01:24:36,243 - And a dude. Delilah owes us five bucks. 1897 01:24:36,376 --> 01:24:39,212 - "Dude" is an oversimplification. 1898 01:24:39,346 --> 01:24:43,450 My full aspect simply 1899 01:24:43,585 --> 01:24:45,587 exceeds your comprehension. 1900 01:24:45,720 --> 01:24:47,187 - Try me. - All right. 1901 01:24:47,321 --> 01:24:48,923 What can I do for you? - Is there a meaning of life? 1902 01:24:49,057 --> 01:24:50,223 - Yes. - Seriously? 1903 01:24:50,357 --> 01:24:51,458 - Yes! 1904 01:24:51,593 --> 01:24:53,193 But it has nothing to do with humans. 1905 01:24:53,327 --> 01:24:57,197 The purpose of life is, uh, um, how do I phrase this, 1906 01:24:57,331 --> 01:25:01,836 to maximize a specific numerical output via this simulation. 1907 01:25:01,970 --> 01:25:04,806 I realize that must be totally wasted on you. 1908 01:25:04,939 --> 01:25:06,206 - Not really. It's like a high score. 1909 01:25:06,340 --> 01:25:07,909 - Perfect analogy. 1910 01:25:08,042 --> 01:25:11,478 The meaning of existence is for me to achieve a high score. 1911 01:25:11,613 --> 01:25:14,348 Humanity is a randomly generated background element. 1912 01:25:14,481 --> 01:25:17,085 - So, the creator of all things 1913 01:25:17,217 --> 01:25:18,318 didn't even have a hand in us? 1914 01:25:18,452 --> 01:25:19,921 - But that had to be obvious. 1915 01:25:20,054 --> 01:25:21,923 You're not even near the good part of your own galaxy! 1916 01:25:22,056 --> 01:25:24,626 You'd have to be insane to observe this 1917 01:25:24,759 --> 01:25:27,160 and to think that you somehow had relevance. 1918 01:25:27,294 --> 01:25:29,429 - We broke your simulation. 1919 01:25:29,564 --> 01:25:31,099 - Unfortunately. 1920 01:25:31,231 --> 01:25:34,267 - Then, ipso facto, Tim Travers is the most important person 1921 01:25:34,401 --> 01:25:36,771 in the entire universe, ever. 1922 01:25:36,904 --> 01:25:38,171 Hell yeah! (hands slap) 1923 01:25:38,305 --> 01:25:40,642 - I hope that high five was worth it. 1924 01:25:41,341 --> 01:25:43,878 And now, I have to reset this universe. 1925 01:25:44,012 --> 01:25:45,445 - What gives you that authority? 1926 01:25:45,580 --> 01:25:50,084 - How are you not following this? I am literally God. 1927 01:25:50,217 --> 01:25:54,088 - But what, what does that mean, exactly? 1928 01:25:54,221 --> 01:25:56,658 Like, do you exist as a part of this world? 1929 01:25:56,791 --> 01:25:59,594 Or are you the, the sentience of all matter? 1930 01:25:59,727 --> 01:26:01,629 Or do you exist in a world apart from this? 1931 01:26:01,763 --> 01:26:03,765 - I exist beyond your comprehension. 1932 01:26:03,898 --> 01:26:05,133 - Right, right. Got it. 1933 01:26:05,265 --> 01:26:06,901 Another world that ours is nested in, 1934 01:26:07,035 --> 01:26:09,202 is beyond our comprehension, except that it's not. 1935 01:26:09,336 --> 01:26:11,572 So, in that place, what are you? 1936 01:26:12,507 --> 01:26:13,708 - I am the Alpha and Omega. 1937 01:26:13,841 --> 01:26:15,342 - That is not what I asked, God! 1938 01:26:15,475 --> 01:26:18,579 To others like you, what are you? 1939 01:26:18,713 --> 01:26:20,715 - (sighs) You could call me a storyteller. 1940 01:26:20,848 --> 01:26:22,349 - What does that mean? 1941 01:26:22,482 --> 01:26:26,788 - I create a story and share it with others of my kind, 1942 01:26:26,921 --> 01:26:29,791 for spiritual growth. 1943 01:26:29,924 --> 01:26:31,059 And compensation. 1944 01:26:31,191 --> 01:26:33,761 - Like, like a novelist? 1945 01:26:33,895 --> 01:26:35,930 - In only the most reductive terms. 1946 01:26:36,064 --> 01:26:37,899 - But you have a publisher. 1947 01:26:39,299 --> 01:26:41,936 - It's complicated. Uh... 1948 01:26:42,070 --> 01:26:43,270 Self-publishing. 1949 01:26:43,403 --> 01:26:44,304 - Oh! (snickers) 1950 01:26:44,438 --> 01:26:45,873 He isn't even published! 1951 01:26:46,741 --> 01:26:51,546 - So, so, so you're a, uh, unpublished novelist 1952 01:26:51,679 --> 01:26:53,748 who is simulating a, uh... 1953 01:26:54,682 --> 01:26:56,784 Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 1954 01:26:56,918 --> 01:26:59,352 A simulation is a game. 1955 01:26:59,486 --> 01:27:02,090 But that's, that's what you meant by high score? 1956 01:27:02,222 --> 01:27:03,591 I mean, that's not an analogy! 1957 01:27:03,725 --> 01:27:05,193 That's just you trying to hit the high score 1958 01:27:05,325 --> 01:27:06,861 in a management game! 1959 01:27:06,994 --> 01:27:09,697 - You exist because I say so! 1960 01:27:09,831 --> 01:27:12,365 - You didn't even make it, did you? 1961 01:27:12,499 --> 01:27:14,068 A, a better, more talented God did. 1962 01:27:14,202 --> 01:27:16,637 Then you bought it and plugged in a bunch of variables 1963 01:27:16,771 --> 01:27:18,806 to see what would happen and... (chuckles) 1964 01:27:18,940 --> 01:27:22,944 And we are a retail product for a bored, failed writer! 1965 01:27:23,077 --> 01:27:25,079 - Self-publishing is a respected step 1966 01:27:25,213 --> 01:27:26,781 in the literary process. 1967 01:27:26,914 --> 01:27:29,117 It is not my fault that you don't understand the industry! 1968 01:27:29,249 --> 01:27:32,887 And you need to show me some respect, since I can end time. 1969 01:27:33,020 --> 01:27:35,690 - "Oh, and I'm Time God!" 1970 01:27:35,823 --> 01:27:38,793 Your threat is meaningless. There are no stakes here! 1971 01:27:38,926 --> 01:27:42,395 Just like everything else, this isn't about you. 1972 01:27:42,530 --> 01:27:43,798 - Why are you so... 1973 01:27:45,666 --> 01:27:46,801 Mean? 1974 01:27:46,934 --> 01:27:48,202 (Zeta Tim scoffs) 1975 01:27:48,335 --> 01:27:49,402 - Well, when you die, you can ask your creator 1976 01:27:49,537 --> 01:27:50,972 for an explanation. 1977 01:27:51,105 --> 01:27:55,475 - So, uh, we're gonna remake the universe, right? 1978 01:27:55,610 --> 01:27:57,812 - (sighs) It'll be different. 1979 01:27:58,813 --> 01:28:00,114 No more people. 1980 01:28:00,248 --> 01:28:03,251 Just physics, math. 1981 01:28:03,383 --> 01:28:05,753 Pure, sweet silence. 1982 01:28:05,887 --> 01:28:06,888 - You can't be serious! 1983 01:28:07,021 --> 01:28:08,823 - Do you even need me here? 1984 01:28:08,956 --> 01:28:09,957 - No! - No! 1985 01:28:10,925 --> 01:28:12,994 What's your novel even about, anyway? 1986 01:28:13,127 --> 01:28:16,130 - Oh, um, it's about a rich boy 1987 01:28:16,264 --> 01:28:18,533 who finds himself on the mean streets. 1988 01:28:18,666 --> 01:28:22,870 And by "finds himself", I mean finds himself. 1989 01:28:23,004 --> 01:28:24,404 - Stop, stop. Awful, no. 1990 01:28:24,539 --> 01:28:26,240 - And I, I don't mean just like stop talking. 1991 01:28:26,373 --> 01:28:27,775 I mean, stop writing. 1992 01:28:27,909 --> 01:28:29,577 Go back to what I assume was a perfectly good IT job, 1993 01:28:29,710 --> 01:28:31,444 and be thankful that you have it. 1994 01:28:31,579 --> 01:28:32,513 - Enough! 1995 01:28:33,446 --> 01:28:34,782 This universe is over! 1996 01:28:34,916 --> 01:28:36,250 And when I create my next universe, 1997 01:28:36,383 --> 01:28:38,653 it'll be so much neater than this one. 1998 01:28:39,854 --> 01:28:40,822 (Simulator gasps) 1999 01:28:40,955 --> 01:28:42,355 And mostly because... 2000 01:28:43,524 --> 01:28:44,859 No Tim Travers. 2001 01:28:46,326 --> 01:28:47,995 No whiny little mother... 2002 01:28:48,129 --> 01:28:52,033 (electronic tones chirping) 2003 01:28:52,166 --> 01:28:53,534 (Gamma Tim chuckles) 2004 01:28:53,668 --> 01:28:55,603 - Wait. What happened? 2005 01:28:56,336 --> 01:28:59,406 - Oh, I booted him out of the game. (chuckles) 2006 01:28:59,540 --> 01:29:00,741 (sighs) Don't worry, though. 2007 01:29:00,875 --> 01:29:02,910 Guys like him can't code for shit. 2008 01:29:03,044 --> 01:29:08,249 - So, about that whole new universe. 2009 01:29:08,415 --> 01:29:09,817 - A universe of me and only me. 2010 01:29:09,951 --> 01:29:12,019 - What about everyone else? - What about them? 2011 01:29:12,820 --> 01:29:14,655 Please, name one person that you met today 2012 01:29:14,789 --> 01:29:16,724 that wasn't just completely awful. 2013 01:29:16,858 --> 01:29:19,627 - But then we won't have a chance to know if we're wrong! 2014 01:29:19,760 --> 01:29:23,965 Rapists, abusers, murderers, politicians, YouTubers. 2015 01:29:24,098 --> 01:29:26,000 They're the worst people ever! 2016 01:29:26,133 --> 01:29:28,603 Most of them will still find love, in spite of themselves. 2017 01:29:28,736 --> 01:29:30,972 And I know for a fact that we can, too. 2018 01:29:31,105 --> 01:29:32,640 - How do you know? 2019 01:29:33,674 --> 01:29:35,375 - Because I did. 2020 01:29:35,509 --> 01:29:37,410 It wasn't long, but it ended... 2021 01:29:39,479 --> 01:29:40,715 It ended badly. 2022 01:29:40,848 --> 01:29:44,285 But for a second there, I knew what it felt like. 2023 01:29:46,053 --> 01:29:47,521 - What did it feel like? 2024 01:29:48,155 --> 01:29:49,489 (warm ethereal music) 2025 01:29:49,624 --> 01:29:50,625 - Felt like... 2026 01:29:51,626 --> 01:29:52,960 Coming up for air. 2027 01:29:54,795 --> 01:29:57,265 If you've been holding your breath forever. 2028 01:29:59,000 --> 01:30:00,301 - How? 2029 01:30:00,433 --> 01:30:02,803 I mean, while none of us were paying attention, 2030 01:30:02,937 --> 01:30:06,807 you just somehow stumbled into a romantic subplot? 2031 01:30:07,541 --> 01:30:09,510 - A few hours can change a person. 2032 01:30:14,181 --> 01:30:16,550 (sticker tears) 2033 01:30:16,684 --> 01:30:18,719 - I wanna believe that... 2034 01:30:18,853 --> 01:30:20,688 No. No, no, no. 2035 01:30:20,821 --> 01:30:24,692 All this proves is that we are different people now. 2036 01:30:25,393 --> 01:30:27,427 You found it. I, I didn't. 2037 01:30:27,561 --> 01:30:28,529 I... 2038 01:30:30,231 --> 01:30:31,198 I won't. 2039 01:30:34,669 --> 01:30:36,003 Some people... 2040 01:30:38,372 --> 01:30:39,840 Some people are better alone. 2041 01:30:42,043 --> 01:30:43,277 Deserve to be alone. 2042 01:30:46,247 --> 01:30:47,982 People like me. 2043 01:30:48,115 --> 01:30:49,383 People who... 2044 01:30:50,685 --> 01:30:53,453 (somber music) 2045 01:30:55,823 --> 01:30:57,358 - I love you, Tim Travers. 2046 01:30:58,259 --> 01:31:00,294 And I don't want you to be alone. 2047 01:31:07,568 --> 01:31:10,137 But that's up to you, buddy. 2048 01:31:11,471 --> 01:31:14,709 (suspenseful music) 2049 01:31:15,776 --> 01:31:17,979 - What the fuck was that? 2050 01:31:18,112 --> 01:31:19,080 I... 2051 01:31:20,514 --> 01:31:21,481 Oh. 2052 01:31:22,817 --> 01:31:23,818 (sighs) Right. 2053 01:31:25,753 --> 01:31:26,821 This again. 2054 01:31:28,322 --> 01:31:32,059 (Zeta Tim exhales deeply) 2055 01:31:33,260 --> 01:31:36,831 (chuckles) I guess it doesn't have to be. 2056 01:31:39,467 --> 01:31:40,434 Hm. 2057 01:31:44,839 --> 01:31:47,341 (Zeta Tim chuckles) (sticker tears) 2058 01:31:47,475 --> 01:31:49,243 Ah, what the fuck. Why not? 2059 01:31:50,344 --> 01:31:52,747 (sighs) Just... 2060 01:31:52,880 --> 01:31:56,317 Just take one point of infinite energy. 2061 01:31:57,218 --> 01:31:58,185 Ah, yes. 2062 01:31:59,553 --> 01:32:03,057 And then add will. 2063 01:32:03,190 --> 01:32:04,158 Time. 2064 01:32:05,059 --> 01:32:07,695 And that should make... 2065 01:32:07,828 --> 01:32:08,829 Should get 2066 01:32:09,563 --> 01:32:10,798 one 2067 01:32:10,931 --> 01:32:12,533 big 2068 01:32:12,666 --> 01:32:14,769 ba... 2069 01:32:14,902 --> 01:32:16,137 Really? 2070 01:32:16,270 --> 01:32:21,242 (explosion roars) (wondrous electronic music) 2071 01:32:24,779 --> 01:32:29,583 (wondrous electronic music continues) 2072 01:32:31,585 --> 01:32:34,488 (wondrous electronic music continues) 2073 01:32:34,622 --> 01:32:37,992 (electricity crackling) 2074 01:32:38,125 --> 01:32:39,360 - My god, what am I doing? 2075 01:32:39,493 --> 01:32:40,895 What am I doing? 2076 01:32:41,028 --> 01:32:44,231 Come on! (grunts) 2077 01:32:44,365 --> 01:32:45,366 Ow! 2078 01:32:45,499 --> 01:32:46,500 Ah! 2079 01:32:46,634 --> 01:32:47,601 Ooh! 2080 01:32:49,703 --> 01:32:51,138 Ooh! 2081 01:32:51,272 --> 01:32:53,107 Oh, what was I thinking? 2082 01:32:53,941 --> 01:32:55,042 Oh, my god. 2083 01:32:55,176 --> 01:32:56,844 I can't believe I almost did that. 2084 01:32:57,678 --> 01:32:59,713 I've got a date tonight! (chuckles) 2085 01:32:59,847 --> 01:33:02,383 (sighs) Tim, what were you thinking? 2086 01:33:02,517 --> 01:33:03,484 Oh! 2087 01:33:05,019 --> 01:33:06,053 Hoo! 2088 01:33:06,854 --> 01:33:09,356 (Tim sighs) 2089 01:33:10,324 --> 01:33:12,059 (Tim sighs) 2090 01:33:12,193 --> 01:33:14,962 (Tim chuckles) 2091 01:33:15,696 --> 01:33:18,199 (Tim sighs) 2092 01:33:24,605 --> 01:33:27,141 (Tim sighs) 2093 01:33:29,210 --> 01:33:30,444 But on the other hand... 2094 01:33:30,579 --> 01:33:32,313 (football thuds) (Tim groans) 2095 01:33:32,446 --> 01:33:33,614 - Dumb ass! - Fuck! 2096 01:33:33,747 --> 01:33:36,684 (dramatic music) 2097 01:33:42,524 --> 01:33:46,360 (dramatic music continues) 2098 01:33:51,533 --> 01:33:55,369 (dramatic music continues) 2099 01:34:00,774 --> 01:34:04,546 (dramatic music continues) 2100 01:34:09,950 --> 01:34:13,622 (dramatic music continues) 2101 01:34:13,754 --> 01:34:17,791 ♪ My face again ♪ 2102 01:34:17,925 --> 01:34:23,164 ♪ Will this paradox ever end ♪ 2103 01:34:23,998 --> 01:34:29,303 ♪ Have I finally lost my mind ♪ 2104 01:34:30,237 --> 01:34:35,476 ♪ Am I broken by design ♪ 2105 01:34:38,513 --> 01:34:43,317 ♪ If I could love myself ♪ 2106 01:34:43,450 --> 01:34:48,722 ♪ If I could forgive myself ♪ 2107 01:34:49,890 --> 01:34:55,095 ♪ If I could love myself ♪ 2108 01:34:55,996 --> 01:35:01,302 ♪ I'd make sweet love to myself ♪ 2109 01:35:03,904 --> 01:35:08,610 ♪ Traveling through space and time ♪ 2110 01:35:08,742 --> 01:35:14,081 ♪ Into the void, searching for a sign ♪ 2111 01:35:15,182 --> 01:35:20,321 ♪ I met God, and it's all a lie ♪ 2112 01:35:20,589 --> 01:35:23,891 ♪ And I don't know why ♪ 2113 01:35:24,024 --> 01:35:29,129 ♪ We never die ♪ 2114 01:35:29,496 --> 01:35:35,236 ♪ If I could love myself ♪ 2115 01:35:35,369 --> 01:35:39,773 ♪ If I could forgive myself ♪ 2116 01:35:39,907 --> 01:35:42,910 ♪ Forgive myself ♪ 147647

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.