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Narrator: In the shoe
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store...
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What happens in the back of
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the shoe store stays in the back
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of the shoe store.
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[ Laughs ]
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Narrator: In a corporate
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office...
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In your opinion...
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[ Laughter ]
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Narrator: And in a bakery.
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Put powdered sugar all over
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your face.
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Yeah, soft.
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[ Laughter ]
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Narrator: Plus, tonight's big
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loser shocks the art world.
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[ Gasps ]
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[ Laughter ]
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We are at ferrara's bakery,
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the oldest bakery in Manhattan.
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And today, we're gonna be
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working behind the counter.
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The challenge is we've got to
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do and say whatever we're told.
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If you refuse, you lose.
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I'm in.
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Boom.
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Four cannolis.
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You want the big ones?
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Powdered sugar?
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You got it.
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Tell me when to stop.
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That's the wrong guy to say that
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to.
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[ Laughter ]
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Just unscrew the top, Joe,
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and dump it in there..
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And there we go.
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[ Laughter ]
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And a regular cannoli.
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Joe, smear chocolate on your
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face.
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And pop up.
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Okay, so...
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[ Laughter ]
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Let me tell you something... the
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chocolate here is delicious.
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You know what else is good?
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Cake.
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Did you ever have the cakes
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here?
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That's the tiramisu cake.
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It looks delicious.
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Shove that cake in your face.
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Slam it.
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[ Groans ]
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[ Chuckles ]
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Do it!
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This and the cannoli are
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probably the two things I can't
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resist in this place, you know?
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Joe, we dare you.
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[ Chuckles ]
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Oh, we got him.
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They go fast.
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Oh!
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He did it!
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Would you like some?
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Go ahead.
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Do it.
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Do it.
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Yeah.
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Yeah!
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[ Laughter ]
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Do you have any idea how much
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tiramisu is up my huge nose
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right now?
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[ Ding! ]
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How are you?
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Tell them all the ingredients
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and make it a never ending
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explanation.
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[ Laughs ]
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Do you know how they make this?
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First, they take chocolate,
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sugar.
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If you do the sugar too fast, it
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coagulates and forms a
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crystallized goo.
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Keep going.
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They frost the top with,
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like, a flambé, almost.
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[ Laughter ]
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The saucer comes from sicily.
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They bring it over on a boat
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because it has a certain flavor
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to it.
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Keep going.
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The pastry is thinking about
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what its like to be a pastry.
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She looks like a deer in
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headlights.
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Two hours later, the chefs
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finally turn the oven on.
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If it meets all the criteria,
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right to your plate.
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Do you guys know how they make
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these?
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[ Record scratches ]
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It's actually far more
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complicated.
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[ Ding! ]
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Do your best super Mario
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impression.
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[ As super Mario ] Hello.
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[ Laughter ]
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Welcome to ferrara's.
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It's me, the cannoli guy!
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[ Laughter ]
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Talk with your hands more.
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Mwah!
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Mwah!
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[ Laughter ]
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A cannoli.
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Eh?
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Get her to feed you.
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Get her to feed you!
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You want some?
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Oh!
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Mmm, mangia.
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[ Normal voice ] Four or five?
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Put powdered sugar all over
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your face.
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[ Laughter ]
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Yeah, soft.
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[ Laughter ]
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What was that order?
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I'll give you a sample.
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There you go.
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Interesting thing about that
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cannoli.
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It's made from 100% breast
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milk.
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[ Record scratches ]
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[ Laughter ]
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It's really good.
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Breast milk.
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No.
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Come on. Do it.
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It's made from 100%, uh...
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Goat's milk.
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[ Laughter ]
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Yes.
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[ Buzzer ]
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Which one did you want?
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This one?
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Yes.
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Bobble it, as if it's gonna
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fall.
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Whoa!
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Whoa!
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[ Laughter ]
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Whoa!
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Whoa!
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Whoa!
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[ Laughter continues ]
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Keep going!
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Whoa!
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[ Laughter continues ]
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I'll get you another.
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[ Laughter ]
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Yikers!
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[ Laughter ]
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A raspberry tart?
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Whisper to the tart.
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Be the tart whisperer.
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[ Laughter ]
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You're a good little tart.
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You're gonna go.
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You're a good little tart.
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Shh.
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Come here.
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What else?
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A cannoli?
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One mini one?
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You're gonna go home with this
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girl, and she's gonna eat you,
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and you're feel full.
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Yes?
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[ Laughter ]
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Remember what I said.
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[ Laughter ]
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Don't talk to the cannoli?
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Sorry.
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Don't worry.
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She's gonna be all right.
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[ Laughter ]
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[ Ding! ]
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Who kicked the bucket?
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Q kicked the bucket.
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Woo!
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Is it worse to take a loss when
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there's a horrible pun involved?
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It's the loss I can stand.
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It's the pun that's killing me.
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[ Laughter ]
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You're fat.
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He just hides it well.
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I concentrate it in my core.
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I got skinny arms, skinny legs.
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You unwrap this present, you
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want the gift receipt.
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[ Laughter ]
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Everyone's got an opinion,
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and we want to hear them all.
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So today, we're conducting a
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focus group.
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We've written the questions
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for each other, so they're gonna
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start out kind of normal then
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get really weird really fast.
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Yeah.
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And the goal is we got to have
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the guts to ask every single
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question.
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Hi.
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James. How are you?
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Rachel. Nice to meet you.
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Hi, Rachel. Come on in.
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Have a seat.
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Okay.
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It's important I mention from
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the top, I'm not the client.
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Okay.
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I simply work for the
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focus-group company.
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He really fits this role.
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He looks like a douche.
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What's the last electronic
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item that you've bought?
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Your iPhone.
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IPhone 4.
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Has the recession affected
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your spending habits?
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No.
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Okay.
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Great.
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[ Laughing ] Here's where
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it's gonna start taking a turn.
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In the future technology
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arena...
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What?
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That's a question?
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It is a question.
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No.
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Next question.
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[ Laughter ]
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Every time I go.
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Every time you go?
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Oh, yeah.
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Five, six times.
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[ Laughter ]
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Texting on the [bleep]
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Yep.
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Pretty much.
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What?
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You know, like, "oh, these
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bitches be tripping."
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Stress.
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[ Laughter ]
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Great.
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And the last one is...
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[ laughing ] Oh, my god, the
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next one.
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And, uh, the last question
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great.
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And the last one is...
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[ laughing ] Oh, my god, the
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next one.
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[ Laughter ]
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Oh, my god.
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[ Laughter continues ]
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No.
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You would not.
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We're all done.
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Got through it.
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[ Ding! ]
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All right.
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Done one of these before?
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No.
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You ready?
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Okay.
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Do you ever use coupons?
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Yes.
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Okay.
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Yes.
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Know what this looks like?
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It looks like the real guy is
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tied up in the closet.
301
00:07:29,554 --> 00:07:30,354
[ Laughs ]
302
00:07:30,355 --> 00:07:32,253
Moving on.
303
00:07:32,254 --> 00:07:38,420
[ Laughter ]
304
00:07:38,421 --> 00:07:40,787
Not really.
305
00:07:40,788 --> 00:07:42,387
Okay.
306
00:07:42,388 --> 00:07:44,753
[Bleep] These are something.
307
00:07:44,754 --> 00:07:48,053
Okay.
308
00:07:48,054 --> 00:07:50,387
How wasted do you need to be to
309
00:07:50,388 --> 00:07:51,188
hit this?
310
00:07:51,189 --> 00:07:55,820
[ Laughter ]
311
00:07:55,821 --> 00:07:56,454
Very?
312
00:07:56,455 --> 00:08:00,453
[ Laughter continues ]
313
00:08:00,454 --> 00:08:01,421
All right.
314
00:08:01,422 --> 00:08:04,453
So, um...
315
00:08:04,454 --> 00:08:05,653
There's no way.
316
00:08:05,654 --> 00:08:08,987
How often would you say per
317
00:08:08,988 --> 00:08:10,820
week...
318
00:08:10,821 --> 00:08:13,087
[ Laughs ]
319
00:08:13,088 --> 00:08:14,187
You know what?
320
00:08:14,188 --> 00:08:16,287
We're actually all done here, so
321
00:08:16,288 --> 00:08:17,687
thank you for your time.
322
00:08:17,688 --> 00:08:18,688
Bye.
323
00:08:18,689 --> 00:08:20,587
[ Laughter ]
324
00:08:20,588 --> 00:08:22,353
Oh, my god!
325
00:08:22,354 --> 00:08:24,020
[ Buzzer ]
326
00:08:24,021 --> 00:08:25,253
Do you normally watch
327
00:08:25,254 --> 00:08:25,954
commercials?
328
00:08:25,955 --> 00:08:27,487
When they're entertaining, I
329
00:08:27,488 --> 00:08:28,154
watch them.
330
00:08:28,154 --> 00:08:28,821
Gotcha.
331
00:08:28,821 --> 00:08:29,621
Joe's not gonna go through
332
00:08:29,621 --> 00:08:30,221
all these questions.
333
00:08:30,222 --> 00:08:31,287
He's afraid of this guy.
334
00:08:31,288 --> 00:08:37,187
He's afraid of the suit.
335
00:08:37,188 --> 00:08:38,753
[ Laughter ]
336
00:08:38,754 --> 00:08:40,153
Zero, because there's no such
337
00:08:40,154 --> 00:08:46,387
thing as duck rape.
338
00:08:46,388 --> 00:08:48,087
[ Laughter ]
339
00:08:48,088 --> 00:08:49,153
Okay, so, if ray-ray comes
340
00:08:49,154 --> 00:08:51,587
around, you might drop a dime.
341
00:08:51,588 --> 00:08:53,020
Depending on ray-Ray's needs.
342
00:08:53,021 --> 00:08:55,020
[ Laughter ]
343
00:08:55,021 --> 00:08:57,687
In your opinion...
344
00:08:57,688 --> 00:09:00,820
[ Laughter ]
345
00:09:00,821 --> 00:09:04,320
Very, not very.
346
00:09:04,321 --> 00:09:07,453
Not very.
347
00:09:07,454 --> 00:09:08,487
It's more "very" than "not
348
00:09:08,488 --> 00:09:08,821
very."
349
00:09:08,821 --> 00:09:09,621
[ Laughter ]
350
00:09:09,622 --> 00:09:11,287
Okay, that's all we have today.
351
00:09:11,288 --> 00:09:12,054
You did great.
352
00:09:12,055 --> 00:09:14,720
[ Ding! ]
353
00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:16,520
How many hours of television
354
00:09:16,521 --> 00:09:18,453
would you say that you watch a
355
00:09:18,454 --> 00:09:19,188
day?
356
00:09:19,189 --> 00:09:20,320
Like, two hours.
357
00:09:20,321 --> 00:09:21,154
Two hours?
358
00:09:21,155 --> 00:09:24,387
Okay.
359
00:09:24,388 --> 00:09:24,921
[ Laughter ]
360
00:09:24,921 --> 00:09:25,654
No.
361
00:09:25,654 --> 00:09:26,454
Absolutely not.
362
00:09:26,455 --> 00:09:32,287
[ Laughter continues ]
363
00:09:32,288 --> 00:09:33,687
Did you come up with the
364
00:09:33,688 --> 00:09:34,354
questions?
365
00:09:34,354 --> 00:09:35,121
[ Laughter ]
366
00:09:35,122 --> 00:09:43,122
Oh.
367
00:09:43,721 --> 00:09:44,654
Female.
368
00:09:44,654 --> 00:09:45,588
[ Laughs ]
369
00:09:45,589 --> 00:09:51,753
[ Laughs ]
370
00:09:51,754 --> 00:09:54,987
[ Laughter ]
371
00:09:54,988 --> 00:09:56,053
[ Laughing ] No idea.
372
00:09:56,054 --> 00:09:57,220
Good luck with the next
373
00:09:57,221 --> 00:09:58,221
question.
374
00:09:58,222 --> 00:10:00,487
Oh.
375
00:10:00,488 --> 00:10:01,421
Um...
376
00:10:01,422 --> 00:10:04,587
Uh, well, this one definitely
377
00:10:04,588 --> 00:10:05,588
doesn't apply.
378
00:10:05,621 --> 00:10:08,020
[ Laughter ]
379
00:10:08,021 --> 00:10:10,120
[ Buzzer ]
380
00:10:10,121 --> 00:10:11,153
There's something about being
381
00:10:11,154 --> 00:10:12,187
one-on-one with a woman that I
382
00:10:12,188 --> 00:10:12,921
never got really...
383
00:10:12,922 --> 00:10:14,020
yeah, I heard that about you.
384
00:10:14,021 --> 00:10:14,488
[ Laughter ]
385
00:10:14,521 --> 00:10:16,587
You didn't let me finish!
386
00:10:16,588 --> 00:10:18,087
Narrator: Q is on the ropes
387
00:10:18,088 --> 00:10:19,387
early, but sal is showing
388
00:10:19,388 --> 00:10:23,653
symptoms of loser fever.
389
00:10:23,654 --> 00:10:25,387
There was a time when murr
390
00:10:25,388 --> 00:10:27,253
would do focus groups and, like,
391
00:10:27,254 --> 00:10:27,954
odd jobs.
392
00:10:27,954 --> 00:10:28,321
I did.
393
00:10:28,321 --> 00:10:29,254
So, what's the worst thing
394
00:10:29,254 --> 00:10:29,988
you've done for money?
395
00:10:29,988 --> 00:10:30,754
[ Laughing ] Well...
396
00:10:30,754 --> 00:10:31,588
Oh, we don't want to...
397
00:10:31,588 --> 00:10:32,254
wait, wait, wait.
398
00:10:32,255 --> 00:10:33,953
I retract that question.
399
00:10:33,954 --> 00:10:37,920
[ Laughs ]
400
00:10:37,921 --> 00:10:38,921
We are here at propel shoe
401
00:10:38,921 --> 00:10:39,588
store in Manhattan.
402
00:10:39,588 --> 00:10:40,554
Today, we'll be playing shoe
403
00:10:40,555 --> 00:10:41,620
salesmen.
404
00:10:41,621 --> 00:10:43,053
If you reject a line, you're
405
00:10:43,054 --> 00:10:44,054
out.
406
00:10:48,988 --> 00:10:49,421
Yes.
407
00:10:49,422 --> 00:10:50,553
Do you have this one in
408
00:10:50,554 --> 00:10:50,921
7 1/2?
409
00:10:50,922 --> 00:10:52,087
Throw the shoe over your
410
00:10:52,088 --> 00:10:52,488
shoulder.
411
00:10:52,488 --> 00:10:52,888
7 1/2?
412
00:10:52,888 --> 00:10:53,288
Yeah.
413
00:10:53,288 --> 00:10:53,654
Sure.
414
00:10:53,655 --> 00:10:55,120
I'll find out.
415
00:10:55,121 --> 00:10:56,453
[ Laughter ]
416
00:10:56,454 --> 00:10:57,288
Talk to the woman sitting
417
00:10:57,288 --> 00:10:57,688
down there.
418
00:10:57,688 --> 00:10:58,688
Whisper in her ear, "i'm
419
00:10:58,689 --> 00:10:59,953
married, but what happens in the
420
00:10:59,954 --> 00:11:01,253
back of the shoe store stays in
421
00:11:01,254 --> 00:11:02,820
the back of the shoe store."
422
00:11:02,821 --> 00:11:04,920
I-i-i-I'm married.
423
00:11:04,921 --> 00:11:05,554
[ Laughs ]
424
00:11:05,554 --> 00:11:06,354
Go ahead, buddy.
425
00:11:06,355 --> 00:11:07,587
What happens in the back of
426
00:11:07,588 --> 00:11:08,853
the shoe store stays in the back
427
00:11:08,854 --> 00:11:10,187
of the shoe store.
428
00:11:10,188 --> 00:11:11,054
No way.
429
00:11:11,054 --> 00:11:11,621
All right, buddy.
430
00:11:11,622 --> 00:11:14,553
I bet you can't kiss her.
431
00:11:14,554 --> 00:11:18,053
Oh!
432
00:11:18,054 --> 00:11:20,853
[ Laughter ]
433
00:11:20,854 --> 00:11:22,053
And he does that hand!
434
00:11:22,054 --> 00:11:23,387
Can I go home now, please?
435
00:11:23,388 --> 00:11:24,787
The girl with the hat right
436
00:11:24,788 --> 00:11:25,221
there.
437
00:11:25,222 --> 00:11:26,287
Yep. That's it.
438
00:11:26,288 --> 00:11:28,620
You need help with anything?
439
00:11:28,621 --> 00:11:30,120
You know, you can tell a lot
440
00:11:30,121 --> 00:11:31,520
about a bitch from her shoes.
441
00:11:31,521 --> 00:11:32,488
Not even close.
442
00:11:32,489 --> 00:11:33,587
[ Buzzer ]
443
00:11:33,588 --> 00:11:34,620
Hello.
444
00:11:34,621 --> 00:11:36,353
Welcome to propel.
445
00:11:36,354 --> 00:11:37,553
This guy is begging for it.
446
00:11:37,554 --> 00:11:38,720
Murr, go up and whisper in
447
00:11:38,721 --> 00:11:42,153
his ear.
448
00:11:42,154 --> 00:11:43,121
What kind of shoes you
449
00:11:43,121 --> 00:11:43,654
looking for?
450
00:11:43,655 --> 00:11:46,887
[ Laughter ]
451
00:11:46,888 --> 00:11:50,220
Okay.
452
00:11:50,221 --> 00:11:51,887
Sneakers, or shoes?
453
00:11:51,888 --> 00:11:54,220
[ Laughter ]
454
00:11:54,221 --> 00:11:55,587
This is top-notch material.
455
00:11:55,588 --> 00:11:57,120
Say, "let me go get you this
456
00:11:57,121 --> 00:11:57,988
ting."
457
00:11:57,989 --> 00:11:59,287
[ Laughter ]
458
00:11:59,288 --> 00:11:59,888
Come on.
459
00:11:59,889 --> 00:12:01,187
"Let me get you this ting."
460
00:12:01,188 --> 00:12:01,988
Come on, mon.
461
00:12:01,989 --> 00:12:03,253
Let me go get you this ting.
462
00:12:03,254 --> 00:12:06,520
[ Laughter ]
463
00:12:06,521 --> 00:12:07,454
Murr, help this lady.
464
00:12:07,455 --> 00:12:09,288
Very politely.
465
00:12:11,654 --> 00:12:12,354
Hi.
466
00:12:12,355 --> 00:12:13,520
Would you like any [bleep] shoes
467
00:12:13,521 --> 00:12:13,854
today?
468
00:12:13,855 --> 00:12:21,653
[ Laughter ]
469
00:12:21,654 --> 00:12:22,853
[ Laughing ] Oh, my god.
470
00:12:22,854 --> 00:12:24,120
Come on, murr, get back in
471
00:12:24,121 --> 00:12:24,988
there.
472
00:12:24,989 --> 00:12:28,920
So, how can I help you out?
473
00:12:28,921 --> 00:12:30,753
[ Cheering ]
474
00:12:30,754 --> 00:12:32,920
[ Ding! ]
475
00:12:32,921 --> 00:12:33,588
How you guys doing?
476
00:12:33,588 --> 00:12:34,021
All right?
477
00:12:34,022 --> 00:12:35,053
Everything going all right over
478
00:12:35,054 --> 00:12:36,120
here?
479
00:12:36,121 --> 00:12:38,020
Keep your hand on him.
480
00:12:38,021 --> 00:12:39,620
Do not take your hand off of
481
00:12:39,621 --> 00:12:40,054
him.
482
00:12:40,054 --> 00:12:40,588
Oh.
483
00:12:40,589 --> 00:12:43,187
Quinn, massage his back.
484
00:12:43,188 --> 00:12:44,720
[ Laughing ] Oh, my god.
485
00:12:44,721 --> 00:12:45,554
[ Laughter ]
486
00:12:45,554 --> 00:12:46,221
Yeah.
487
00:12:46,222 --> 00:12:47,987
Oh, your back is really tense.
488
00:12:47,988 --> 00:12:49,353
[ Laughter continues ]
489
00:12:49,354 --> 00:12:50,520
Now, sit down in front of him
490
00:12:50,521 --> 00:12:51,653
and take his hands and put them
491
00:12:51,654 --> 00:12:52,354
on your shoulders.
492
00:12:52,355 --> 00:12:53,420
All right, buddy, it's my
493
00:12:53,421 --> 00:12:53,721
turn.
494
00:12:53,722 --> 00:12:54,753
Come on.
495
00:12:54,754 --> 00:12:55,421
Come on, buddy.
496
00:12:55,421 --> 00:12:55,888
Come on.
497
00:12:55,888 --> 00:12:56,454
[ Laughter ]
498
00:12:56,454 --> 00:12:56,888
Come on.
499
00:12:56,888 --> 00:12:57,454
[ Moans ]
500
00:12:57,455 --> 00:13:00,387
[ Cheering ]
501
00:13:00,388 --> 00:13:01,753
Yeah.
502
00:13:01,754 --> 00:13:02,021
Hi.
503
00:13:02,021 --> 00:13:03,021
You need help with anything
504
00:13:03,021 --> 00:13:03,388
today?
505
00:13:03,388 --> 00:13:04,354
"I would so love to put
506
00:13:04,355 --> 00:13:05,487
whipped cream on your toes and
507
00:13:05,488 --> 00:13:06,553
go to town."
508
00:13:06,554 --> 00:13:08,553
Yeah, say it... Bitch!
509
00:13:08,554 --> 00:13:09,587
[ Laughter ]
510
00:13:09,588 --> 00:13:11,153
What's up, Quinn?
511
00:13:11,154 --> 00:13:12,088
What's up?
512
00:13:12,089 --> 00:13:14,353
"I would so like to put whipped
513
00:13:14,354 --> 00:13:16,387
cream on your toes and go to
514
00:13:16,388 --> 00:13:19,388
town."
515
00:13:24,421 --> 00:13:25,553
Hi. You need help with
516
00:13:25,554 --> 00:13:26,221
anything today?
517
00:13:26,222 --> 00:13:27,253
"I would so love to put
518
00:13:27,254 --> 00:13:28,453
whipped cream on your toes and
519
00:13:28,454 --> 00:13:29,653
go to town."
520
00:13:29,654 --> 00:13:31,620
Yeah, say it... Bitch!
521
00:13:31,621 --> 00:13:32,653
[ Laughter ]
522
00:13:32,654 --> 00:13:34,887
"I would so like to put whipped
523
00:13:34,888 --> 00:13:36,920
cream on your toes and go to
524
00:13:36,921 --> 00:13:37,588
town."
525
00:13:37,589 --> 00:13:39,387
Say it!
526
00:13:39,388 --> 00:13:40,254
Nope.
527
00:13:40,255 --> 00:13:43,220
[ Buzzer ]
528
00:13:43,221 --> 00:13:45,287
You got any chapstick on you?
529
00:13:45,288 --> 00:13:46,853
Chapstick?
530
00:13:46,854 --> 00:13:47,654
No, you can't use my
531
00:13:47,654 --> 00:13:48,088
chapstick.
532
00:13:48,088 --> 00:13:48,721
Are you insane?
533
00:13:48,721 --> 00:13:49,721
I'll put it in my finger or
534
00:13:49,721 --> 00:13:50,154
something.
535
00:13:50,154 --> 00:13:51,154
I don't want your finger on
536
00:13:51,154 --> 00:13:51,654
my chapstick.
537
00:13:51,655 --> 00:13:53,720
That's worse.
538
00:13:53,721 --> 00:13:54,688
Put your finger up, and then
539
00:13:54,688 --> 00:13:55,554
put your finger on my lips.
540
00:13:55,554 --> 00:13:56,554
I don't want to put my finger
541
00:13:56,554 --> 00:13:57,221
anywhere.
542
00:13:57,222 --> 00:13:58,953
Let's keep your fingers and your
543
00:13:58,954 --> 00:13:59,987
lips to yourself.
544
00:13:59,988 --> 00:14:00,421
Sal.
545
00:14:00,421 --> 00:14:00,854
Yeah?
546
00:14:00,854 --> 00:14:01,854
You gonna give it to me?
547
00:14:01,854 --> 00:14:02,254
What?
548
00:14:02,254 --> 00:14:03,088
I'm not gonna give him
549
00:14:03,088 --> 00:14:03,821
chapstick. I know.
550
00:14:03,822 --> 00:14:05,887
You know where that's been.
551
00:14:05,888 --> 00:14:06,754
Size 7?
552
00:14:06,755 --> 00:14:09,353
Yes.
553
00:14:09,354 --> 00:14:10,254
Joey, yell out the shoe
554
00:14:10,254 --> 00:14:10,588
order.
555
00:14:10,589 --> 00:14:11,953
Azlet, size 7!
556
00:14:11,954 --> 00:14:12,888
[ Laughs ]
557
00:14:12,888 --> 00:14:13,788
[ Laughter ]
558
00:14:13,789 --> 00:14:14,820
Do it again.
559
00:14:14,821 --> 00:14:15,920
Get in her face.
560
00:14:15,921 --> 00:14:18,287
Larry, I need an azlet,
561
00:14:18,288 --> 00:14:19,221
size 7!
562
00:14:19,222 --> 00:14:20,520
[ Laughter ]
563
00:14:20,521 --> 00:14:21,354
It's a good pick.
564
00:14:21,354 --> 00:14:22,188
It's a good pick.
565
00:14:22,189 --> 00:14:23,220
[ Laughter continues ]
566
00:14:23,221 --> 00:14:24,653
One more, as loud as you can.
567
00:14:24,654 --> 00:14:25,753
Do it right in her face.
568
00:14:25,754 --> 00:14:27,320
38!
569
00:14:27,321 --> 00:14:28,887
Larry!
570
00:14:28,888 --> 00:14:30,020
38!
571
00:14:30,021 --> 00:14:32,453
[ Laughter ]
572
00:14:32,454 --> 00:14:34,020
Those, size 8.
573
00:14:34,021 --> 00:14:35,153
[ Laughter ]
574
00:14:35,154 --> 00:14:36,653
Nose her foot.
575
00:14:36,654 --> 00:14:38,487
[ Laughter continues ]
576
00:14:38,488 --> 00:14:41,020
[ Ding! ]
577
00:14:41,021 --> 00:14:43,187
Put it against your head.
578
00:14:43,188 --> 00:14:44,320
[ Laughter ]
579
00:14:44,321 --> 00:14:47,220
Tell her to push hard.
580
00:14:47,221 --> 00:14:48,987
Get her foot in the shoe.
581
00:14:48,988 --> 00:14:54,920
[ Laughter ]
582
00:14:54,921 --> 00:14:55,421
Larry!
583
00:14:55,421 --> 00:14:56,354
I need an 8 1/2!
584
00:14:56,388 --> 00:14:58,920
[ Ding! ]
585
00:14:58,921 --> 00:14:59,788
One thing that we have
586
00:14:59,789 --> 00:15:00,820
learned today is that we're
587
00:15:00,821 --> 00:15:01,887
not cut out to be shoe salesmen.
588
00:15:01,888 --> 00:15:02,964
And Larry takes a really long
589
00:15:02,988 --> 00:15:04,053
lunch.
590
00:15:04,054 --> 00:15:04,921
All: Larry!
591
00:15:04,922 --> 00:15:06,187
He's a hell of guy.
592
00:15:06,188 --> 00:15:07,054
All: Larry!
593
00:15:07,055 --> 00:15:08,453
Narrator: That's three
594
00:15:08,454 --> 00:15:09,421
challenges down.
595
00:15:09,422 --> 00:15:14,087
Who will be tonight's big loser?
596
00:15:14,088 --> 00:15:15,520
Murr is always wearing dress
597
00:15:15,521 --> 00:15:15,954
shoes.
598
00:15:15,955 --> 00:15:17,287
This is comfortable to me.
599
00:15:17,288 --> 00:15:18,254
Sal has flat feet.
600
00:15:18,255 --> 00:15:19,520
Yeah, I don't know if you
601
00:15:19,521 --> 00:15:20,121
could tell.
602
00:15:20,122 --> 00:15:22,087
I have the flattest... there is
603
00:15:22,088 --> 00:15:23,187
no arch at all.
604
00:15:23,188 --> 00:15:24,320
There's nothing.
605
00:15:24,321 --> 00:15:25,587
No, don't do that.
606
00:15:25,588 --> 00:15:26,787
No, no, no!
607
00:15:26,788 --> 00:15:28,087
[ Laughter ]
608
00:15:28,088 --> 00:15:31,487
[ Horn honks ]
609
00:15:31,488 --> 00:15:32,088
Yoga.
610
00:15:32,088 --> 00:15:32,854
Pilates.
611
00:15:32,854 --> 00:15:33,688
Body pump.
612
00:15:33,688 --> 00:15:34,621
Street jazz.
613
00:15:34,622 --> 00:15:36,153
These are the classes we are
614
00:15:36,154 --> 00:15:37,220
teaching today.
615
00:15:37,221 --> 00:15:38,820
If anyone walks out of the
616
00:15:38,821 --> 00:15:39,920
class, you lose.
617
00:15:39,921 --> 00:15:40,854
What world do you live in
618
00:15:40,854 --> 00:15:41,854
that you think any credibility
619
00:15:41,855 --> 00:15:42,887
is gonna come out of you walking
620
00:15:42,888 --> 00:15:43,920
in that room looking the way you
621
00:15:43,921 --> 00:15:44,221
look?
622
00:15:44,221 --> 00:15:44,954
I don't have to be
623
00:15:44,955 --> 00:15:46,954
crane-lifted out of my bed.
624
00:15:48,988 --> 00:15:50,187
What is going on there?
625
00:15:50,188 --> 00:15:51,387
These guys are Broadway
626
00:15:51,388 --> 00:15:51,921
dancers.
627
00:15:51,921 --> 00:15:52,421
Yeah.
628
00:15:52,422 --> 00:15:53,853
They're never gonna listen to
629
00:15:53,854 --> 00:15:54,920
us.
630
00:15:54,921 --> 00:15:56,120
Hello, hello, hello.
631
00:15:56,121 --> 00:15:57,187
Hi, everybody.
632
00:15:57,188 --> 00:15:57,921
I'm James.
633
00:15:57,922 --> 00:15:59,720
We're gonna loosen up our arms a
634
00:15:59,721 --> 00:16:00,554
little bit.
635
00:16:00,554 --> 00:16:01,488
Oh, my god.
636
00:16:01,489 --> 00:16:02,787
They're following him.
637
00:16:02,788 --> 00:16:04,420
Everybody out to the side.
638
00:16:04,421 --> 00:16:05,787
You should feel a burn.
639
00:16:05,788 --> 00:16:06,820
"Just like I do when I
640
00:16:06,821 --> 00:16:08,320
urinate."
641
00:16:08,321 --> 00:16:09,088
You know.
642
00:16:09,089 --> 00:16:10,420
Kind of like I do when I
643
00:16:10,421 --> 00:16:11,021
urinate.
644
00:16:11,022 --> 00:16:12,787
[ Laughter ]
645
00:16:12,788 --> 00:16:13,887
Okay, now everyone should reach
646
00:16:13,888 --> 00:16:14,821
over and touch your toes.
647
00:16:14,822 --> 00:16:15,920
"I call it the little John."
648
00:16:15,921 --> 00:16:17,053
This is just like your little
649
00:16:17,054 --> 00:16:17,388
John.
650
00:16:17,388 --> 00:16:18,154
"Skeet skeet."
651
00:16:18,155 --> 00:16:19,653
Skeet skeet, mother [bleep]
652
00:16:19,654 --> 00:16:21,453
[ Laughter ]
653
00:16:21,454 --> 00:16:22,820
Skeet skeet, [bleep] Damn.
654
00:16:22,821 --> 00:16:24,020
[ Laughter continues ]
655
00:16:24,021 --> 00:16:25,487
So, let's do a couple moves,
656
00:16:25,488 --> 00:16:25,921
okay?
657
00:16:25,922 --> 00:16:26,987
One, two, three, four.
658
00:16:26,988 --> 00:16:28,087
One, two, three, four.
659
00:16:28,088 --> 00:16:29,553
And kind of get the hands going.
660
00:16:29,554 --> 00:16:30,154
That's it.
661
00:16:30,154 --> 00:16:30,854
[ Laughter ]
662
00:16:30,855 --> 00:16:32,120
How much longer are they
663
00:16:32,121 --> 00:16:33,387
gonna buy this crap?
664
00:16:33,388 --> 00:16:34,254
Now, arms.
665
00:16:34,255 --> 00:16:35,620
"Fly the airplane."
666
00:16:35,621 --> 00:16:36,321
Fly the airplane.
667
00:16:36,321 --> 00:16:37,021
And there they go.
668
00:16:37,021 --> 00:16:37,488
[ Laughter ]
669
00:16:37,488 --> 00:16:38,388
Excuse me, where are you
670
00:16:38,388 --> 00:16:38,921
going?
671
00:16:38,922 --> 00:16:40,587
We got a [bleep] load more jazz
672
00:16:40,588 --> 00:16:41,121
to go.
673
00:16:41,121 --> 00:16:41,854
[ Laughter ]
674
00:16:41,855 --> 00:16:43,920
[ Buzzer ]
675
00:16:43,921 --> 00:16:45,487
Hi, everybody.
676
00:16:45,488 --> 00:16:46,388
[ Laughing ] Look at him.
677
00:16:46,388 --> 00:16:47,054
Look at the swagger.
678
00:16:47,055 --> 00:16:48,520
Ready for a little peaceful
679
00:16:48,521 --> 00:16:48,954
yoga?
680
00:16:48,955 --> 00:16:50,387
All right, just got back from
681
00:16:50,388 --> 00:16:52,787
Tibet on, like, a yoga mission.
682
00:16:52,788 --> 00:16:53,920
[ Laughter ]
683
00:16:53,921 --> 00:16:55,620
But, boy, are my arms tired.
684
00:16:55,621 --> 00:16:57,053
[ Laughter continues ]
685
00:16:57,054 --> 00:16:57,421
Okay.
686
00:16:57,422 --> 00:16:58,753
"This is a great stretch for
687
00:16:58,754 --> 00:16:59,421
your uterus."
688
00:16:59,421 --> 00:17:00,154
All right.
689
00:17:00,155 --> 00:17:02,187
We're gonna do a great stretch
690
00:17:02,188 --> 00:17:03,687
for our uteruses now.
691
00:17:03,688 --> 00:17:04,654
[ Laughter ]
692
00:17:04,655 --> 00:17:05,920
Tell them the downward dog.
693
00:17:05,921 --> 00:17:06,688
Downward dog.
694
00:17:06,688 --> 00:17:07,388
Do we know it?
695
00:17:07,388 --> 00:17:08,054
That's right.
696
00:17:08,055 --> 00:17:10,587
Let's get in that position.
697
00:17:10,588 --> 00:17:11,620
He doesn't know it.
698
00:17:11,621 --> 00:17:12,288
[ Laughter ]
699
00:17:12,288 --> 00:17:13,121
Is this right?
700
00:17:13,122 --> 00:17:16,687
Am I doing this right?
701
00:17:16,688 --> 00:17:17,154
I work here.
702
00:17:17,154 --> 00:17:17,921
Of course I work here.
703
00:17:17,921 --> 00:17:18,388
[ Laughter ]
704
00:17:18,389 --> 00:17:20,320
Look, that guy's leaving.
705
00:17:20,321 --> 00:17:21,254
You don't want to leave
706
00:17:21,255 --> 00:17:22,287
before the uterus stretching.
707
00:17:22,288 --> 00:17:24,553
[ Buzzer ]
708
00:17:24,554 --> 00:17:25,388
How's everybody doing?
709
00:17:25,389 --> 00:17:26,420
They already don't like him.
710
00:17:26,421 --> 00:17:27,487
My name's sal.
711
00:17:27,488 --> 00:17:28,254
I just want to start off with
712
00:17:28,255 --> 00:17:29,920
breathing exercises first.
713
00:17:29,921 --> 00:17:31,820
So, everybody, let's close our
714
00:17:31,821 --> 00:17:32,354
eyes.
715
00:17:32,354 --> 00:17:32,988
Inhale.
716
00:17:32,989 --> 00:17:34,753
[ Breathes deeply ]
717
00:17:34,754 --> 00:17:36,487
"Now open your eyes."
718
00:17:36,488 --> 00:17:38,020
Now open your eyes.
719
00:17:38,021 --> 00:17:39,753
"Now close your eyes."
720
00:17:39,754 --> 00:17:41,387
Now close your eyes.
721
00:17:41,388 --> 00:17:42,753
"Now open them."
722
00:17:42,754 --> 00:17:44,720
Now open your eyes.
723
00:17:44,721 --> 00:17:47,420
And this is called blinking.
724
00:17:47,421 --> 00:17:48,820
[ Laughter ]
725
00:17:48,821 --> 00:17:50,620
"The key to staying fit."
726
00:17:50,621 --> 00:17:52,620
They key to staying fit is...
727
00:17:52,621 --> 00:17:53,720
Is cupcakes.
728
00:17:53,721 --> 00:17:55,987
Cupcakes, right?
729
00:17:55,988 --> 00:17:56,654
Drop them.
730
00:17:56,655 --> 00:17:57,753
"In your mouth."
731
00:17:57,754 --> 00:17:59,087
In your mouth.
732
00:17:59,088 --> 00:18:00,453
Then force yourself to vomit.
733
00:18:00,454 --> 00:18:03,220
[ Laughter ]
734
00:18:03,221 --> 00:18:05,487
[ Ding! ]
735
00:18:05,488 --> 00:18:06,653
How we doing?
736
00:18:06,654 --> 00:18:07,720
All right?
737
00:18:07,721 --> 00:18:08,621
This stretch is what I call
738
00:18:08,621 --> 00:18:09,254
the frank and beans.
739
00:18:09,254 --> 00:18:09,621
Right.
740
00:18:09,621 --> 00:18:10,521
Here, we're gonna do the frank
741
00:18:10,521 --> 00:18:10,921
and beans.
742
00:18:10,921 --> 00:18:11,754
Knees tight.
743
00:18:11,755 --> 00:18:13,353
[ Laughter ]
744
00:18:13,354 --> 00:18:14,088
Bring it around.
745
00:18:14,088 --> 00:18:14,721
There you go.
746
00:18:14,721 --> 00:18:15,154
Stop it.
747
00:18:15,155 --> 00:18:16,620
Bring it back the other way.
748
00:18:16,621 --> 00:18:17,388
[ Laughter ]
749
00:18:17,389 --> 00:18:19,020
A lot of people ask me how long
750
00:18:19,021 --> 00:18:20,087
I've been teaching.
751
00:18:20,088 --> 00:18:21,021
Don't answer.
752
00:18:21,022 --> 00:18:22,120
Don't answer.
753
00:18:22,121 --> 00:18:23,420
There you go.
754
00:18:23,421 --> 00:18:24,487
[ Laughter ]
755
00:18:24,488 --> 00:18:25,753
Perfect.
756
00:18:25,754 --> 00:18:26,254
Okay.
757
00:18:26,255 --> 00:18:28,053
On top, I like to call this the
758
00:18:28,054 --> 00:18:28,854
"Titanic."."
759
00:18:28,855 --> 00:18:30,587
[ Laughter ]
760
00:18:30,588 --> 00:18:31,853
Feel me, Jack.
761
00:18:31,854 --> 00:18:32,987
I trust you.
762
00:18:32,988 --> 00:18:34,553
I trust you, Jack.
763
00:18:34,554 --> 00:18:35,687
[ Laughter ]
764
00:18:35,688 --> 00:18:36,088
Good.
765
00:18:36,088 --> 00:18:36,854
Bring it down.
766
00:18:36,855 --> 00:18:37,920
Now go crazy, Joe.
767
00:18:37,921 --> 00:18:39,153
Got some cardio going.
768
00:18:39,154 --> 00:18:40,353
[Bleep] The step.
769
00:18:40,354 --> 00:18:41,288
Let's do it.
770
00:18:41,288 --> 00:18:41,888
Do it.
771
00:18:41,888 --> 00:18:42,488
Do it.
772
00:18:42,488 --> 00:18:43,221
Let's do it.
773
00:18:43,221 --> 00:18:44,121
Don't be afraid.
774
00:18:44,122 --> 00:18:45,387
Don't be [bleep] afraid!
775
00:18:45,388 --> 00:18:46,987
Don't make me do this by myself.
776
00:18:46,988 --> 00:18:48,220
It's a journey, people.
777
00:18:48,221 --> 00:18:48,954
Let's do it.
778
00:18:48,954 --> 00:18:49,688
Let's do it.
779
00:18:49,689 --> 00:18:50,720
Get those knees up.
780
00:18:50,721 --> 00:18:51,987
Knees up, mother [bleep]
781
00:18:51,988 --> 00:18:52,888
It's dance time.
782
00:18:52,888 --> 00:18:53,721
Who's with me?
783
00:18:53,721 --> 00:18:54,354
That's it.
784
00:18:54,354 --> 00:18:55,254
Pump it out.
785
00:18:55,254 --> 00:18:56,188
Pump it out.
786
00:18:56,188 --> 00:18:56,888
Woo woo!
787
00:18:56,889 --> 00:18:58,487
Get on the [bleep] train,
788
00:18:58,488 --> 00:18:59,121
people.
789
00:18:59,121 --> 00:18:59,888
[ Ding! ]
790
00:18:59,889 --> 00:19:01,753
Narrator: For q, that was
791
00:19:01,754 --> 00:19:03,553
fail number four, making him
792
00:19:03,554 --> 00:19:04,920
tonight's big loser.
793
00:19:04,921 --> 00:19:05,921
So, we're here at an upscale
794
00:19:05,921 --> 00:19:06,388
art gallery.
795
00:19:06,388 --> 00:19:07,388
Yeah, and we have a crowd of
796
00:19:07,389 --> 00:19:09,053
art lovers coming in to see q's
797
00:19:09,054 --> 00:19:10,420
new photography exhibit.
798
00:19:10,421 --> 00:19:11,987
I suppose these photos are
799
00:19:11,988 --> 00:19:12,454
gems?
800
00:19:12,455 --> 00:19:14,120
They're photos we had of you
801
00:19:14,121 --> 00:19:15,420
that we've edited through the
802
00:19:15,421 --> 00:19:16,354
magic of computers.
803
00:19:16,355 --> 00:19:17,853
Oh, my god.
804
00:19:17,854 --> 00:19:20,087
[ Classical music plays ]
805
00:19:20,088 --> 00:19:21,054
Oh, my god, it's freaking
806
00:19:21,055 --> 00:19:22,287
packed.
807
00:19:22,288 --> 00:19:24,987
I'm gonna throw up.
808
00:19:24,988 --> 00:19:26,853
Ladies and gentlemen, please
809
00:19:26,854 --> 00:19:28,420
welcome tonight's artist,
810
00:19:28,421 --> 00:19:29,587
Brian Quinn.
811
00:19:29,588 --> 00:19:35,453
[ Applause ]
812
00:19:35,454 --> 00:19:37,087
Hi.
813
00:19:37,088 --> 00:19:38,253
I'm Brian Quinn.
814
00:19:38,254 --> 00:19:39,920
Thanks for coming down to
815
00:19:39,921 --> 00:19:41,053
"me, myself & I
816
00:19:41,054 --> 00:19:43,053
(a journey of self-discovery)."
817
00:19:43,054 --> 00:19:44,953
These are photos where I'm my
818
00:19:44,954 --> 00:19:46,887
own muse, and it's about myself
819
00:19:46,888 --> 00:19:48,787
and it's about my own journey.
820
00:19:48,788 --> 00:19:50,053
I have a feeling we're all gonna
821
00:19:50,054 --> 00:19:50,954
be enlightened today.
822
00:19:50,955 --> 00:19:54,453
So, witht further ado...
823
00:19:54,454 --> 00:19:59,021
[ Laughter ]
824
00:20:02,621 --> 00:20:03,987
So, we're here at an upscale
825
00:20:03,988 --> 00:20:04,954
art gallery in downtown
826
00:20:04,954 --> 00:20:05,954
Manhattan to see q's new
827
00:20:05,955 --> 00:20:07,220
photography exhibit, which he's
828
00:20:07,221 --> 00:20:09,287
never seen before.
829
00:20:09,288 --> 00:20:10,387
The pictures start kind of
830
00:20:10,388 --> 00:20:11,553
normal, but at the end, they get
831
00:20:11,554 --> 00:20:12,687
absolutely nuts.
832
00:20:12,688 --> 00:20:13,288
Hi.
833
00:20:13,289 --> 00:20:14,920
Thanks for coming down to
834
00:20:14,921 --> 00:20:16,120
"me, myself & I."
835
00:20:16,121 --> 00:20:19,753
So, without further ado...
836
00:20:19,754 --> 00:20:21,253
All right.
837
00:20:21,254 --> 00:20:21,988
That's me.
838
00:20:21,989 --> 00:20:23,420
Look at how cute that is.
839
00:20:23,421 --> 00:20:26,420
Over here is my second piece.
840
00:20:26,421 --> 00:20:29,187
Yes, I am highly contagious.
841
00:20:29,188 --> 00:20:30,453
[ Chuckles ]
842
00:20:30,454 --> 00:20:34,320
Here we have...
843
00:20:34,321 --> 00:20:35,653
White people problems.
844
00:20:35,654 --> 00:20:37,453
Don't get distracted by the fact
845
00:20:37,454 --> 00:20:38,421
that I'm white.
846
00:20:38,422 --> 00:20:41,620
You know, 'cause that's just...
847
00:20:41,621 --> 00:20:44,553
I look very worried there.
848
00:20:44,554 --> 00:20:45,720
Rich white people up on the hill
849
00:20:45,721 --> 00:20:46,853
on the manor, you know what i'm
850
00:20:46,854 --> 00:20:47,421
talking about?
851
00:20:47,422 --> 00:20:48,520
Meanwhile, I'm down here and I
852
00:20:48,521 --> 00:20:49,454
can't even eat an apple.
853
00:20:49,455 --> 00:20:53,187
[ Laughter ]
854
00:20:53,188 --> 00:20:53,721
Yes.
855
00:20:53,722 --> 00:20:54,887
And here we go.
856
00:20:54,888 --> 00:20:55,788
That is...
857
00:20:55,789 --> 00:21:00,920
[ laughs ]
858
00:21:00,921 --> 00:21:01,521
Wow.
859
00:21:01,522 --> 00:21:03,853
Well, what happened here is it
860
00:21:03,854 --> 00:21:05,087
looks like...
861
00:21:05,088 --> 00:21:06,088
[ laughs ]
862
00:21:06,089 --> 00:21:08,553
Me stepping on Chinese children.
863
00:21:08,554 --> 00:21:10,987
[ Laughter ]
864
00:21:10,988 --> 00:21:13,087
I just got emotional.
865
00:21:13,088 --> 00:21:17,553
Because I feel like...
866
00:21:17,554 --> 00:21:20,253
I feel like I represent america.
867
00:21:20,254 --> 00:21:22,453
This country was built on
868
00:21:22,454 --> 00:21:24,520
stepping on foreigners.
869
00:21:24,521 --> 00:21:25,288
[ Laughter ]
870
00:21:25,289 --> 00:21:26,887
Finally, the end of the journey
871
00:21:26,888 --> 00:21:28,687
here is...
872
00:21:28,688 --> 00:21:31,287
That's great.
873
00:21:31,288 --> 00:21:33,320
Clearly... clearly... there's no
874
00:21:33,321 --> 00:21:35,387
way to sugar-coat it.
875
00:21:35,388 --> 00:21:37,587
It's a picture of me having
876
00:21:37,588 --> 00:21:39,420
coitus with a buffalo.
877
00:21:39,421 --> 00:21:40,587
[ Laughter ]
878
00:21:40,588 --> 00:21:42,553
I think that about wraps up this
879
00:21:42,554 --> 00:21:43,354
for today.
880
00:21:43,355 --> 00:21:45,287
If you want prints and whatnot,
881
00:21:45,288 --> 00:21:47,254
I can certainly get them for you
46920
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