Original subtitles

Good evening.

Before we begin our play, I would like to demonstrate the training method we

here at the Hitchcock Actors Studio.

You see, we give the students symbols or certain images to assist them in

portraying character.

Because of the type of character our Miss Schmelz was to portray, we

that she think of herself as a tree.

I think she projects it very well. Thank you, Miss Schmertz.

Our next student, Mr. Blackwood, was asked to portray a large, jowly captain

industry. And to help him, we suggested that he think of himself as an elephant.

Excellent.

In all honesty, I must admit that Mr. Blackwood has been with us longer than

Miss Schmelz.

And now, after this brief acting demonstration, we bring you tonight's

preceded by tonight's commercial.

Thank you, Mr. Blackwood.

That will be all, Mr. Blackwood.

I said that will be all, Mr. Blackwood.

Mr. Blackwood.

Bart, are you there?

Hey, Bart.

Open up. It's me, Ed.

Hey, Bart.

Brother.

Not again.

Just about had it.

Bart.

Come on, Bart, wake up.

Bart!

Hey, turn it out!

What is this, the Johnstown flood?

Looks like a disaster area to me.

Well, I had a little, uh...

Bash up here last night. I was entertaining a couple of old buddies.

So I see.

You won't tell Marge, will you?

I'm your agent, not your bodyguard.

Sure, I'm an agent.

So what do you want, 10 % of my hangover?

All I want is you dressed and sober for that audition.

Audition?

So help me, Edwin, clean out of my mind.

Yeah? Well, I've been out of my skull trying to get hold of you.

So how'd you get in?

Marge gave me her key.

Good girl.

Yeah? Why don't you marry her?

Well, the audition, uh... How much time we got, Ed? We're an hour late already.

We'll save the shower in ten minutes.

You sure you feel all right?

Well, there's nothing wrong with me that a good embalmer couldn't fix.

Bart, listen, an audition with Wellman is important. Believe me, you could use

part in a hit play. Yeah, I know it. My landlord told me.

Don't worry, pal. We'll be sitting in Wellman's lap in half an hour.

Yes, Mr.

Robinson, I do realize you've called several times.

But you must understand, he's terribly busy. Forty -five minutes we've been

hanging. Now, where's the action? Relax, baby. You kept him waiting? He keeps

you waiting.

You want to bet?

Excuse me, Cleopatra.

Thought I heard your boss calling.

Oh, he didn't ring.

Well, of course not. He's too impatient.

Just can't wait to see his old friend Bart Collins all the way from Hollywood.

But he doesn't like to be disturbed.

Oh, sure he does. Now, you go ahead and see my people.

Yes, sir, I certainly do.

Bart boy, good to see you.

Hello, Ed. Mr. Wallman, please forgive us. I'm sorry we were late.

You both know Jerry Lane, don't you?

I know him.

Jer was the life of my party last night, weren't you, Jer?

Oh, this guy drinks straight orange juice like it was water.

He's wild.

Well, many thanks, Mr. Warman. I'll contact your agent tomorrow.

It's a nice reading, Jerry. Thank you, sir. Very nice.

That boy's an interesting actor.

Too bad there isn't something to play for him.

Well, I'm not so sure.

Well, there's only one part open. That's right.

The lead. My part. Now, wait a minute. Now, hold it, Bart.

You'll get your chance.

Mr. Wellman, this boy went to the expense of flying all the way back from

California just to audition for you.

I appreciate that, Ed. I want very much to hear him. But that doesn't mean I

can't consider other actors.

Let's go inside, shall we?

Bart, come on.

I think you've had enough.

Yeah, I've had it all right, all the way up to here.

Let's face it, Marge, things are getting rough. I bombed out on the television,

I goofed on the movie, and now I'm following up on a play.

Come on, Bart, it's not the end of the world.

Now you'll get another chance.

I had my chance today until Jerry Lane got into the act.

But didn't you tell me Wellman hasn't decided yet?

And Jerry has a perfect right to try. He's a good actor.

What are you, his lawyer or something?

Wait a minute.

Don't tell me that you and old Jer have been swinging while I've been out on the

coast.

Of course not.

We just had a few dates together.

Fun things.

Fun things, huh?

You and old Jer. Oh, hey, Lady Chatterley, why don't you get us another

huh?

Not for me, thank you.

Please, Lord.

Yeah, well, I'm celebrating.

There's nothing to celebrate yet.

Oh, yes, there is, chick.

There's a lot to celebrate.

Here's to you and my good friend Jerry Lane. He's just the guy for the part.

Thank you, Lolita.

Hey, why don't you drop back in after you knock off and maybe we can work out

fun thing together, huh?

Hello, boy.

Hello, creep.

Mind if we sit down?

I don't care if you drop dead.

I want to explain about the audition.

You mentioned the part last night, but I never gave it another thought. Then

this morning my agent called and said he'd set up an audition with Wellman.

That's how it happened.

Sure.

Hey, not to change the subject, but you owe me ten bucks.

Ten bucks.

Yeah, don't you remember the other night at the party? You borrowed it for the

dice game.

Oh, yeah.

And I got totaled.

Sorry, chum, no bread today.

Come on, let's get out of here. Let's go someplace where it's quiet.

We'll go to my place.

Can't stand these crazy drums.

Come on, Bart. Knock it off.

Hey, Bart.

What's the matter? Don't you dig the classics?

It's Beethoven's Fifth.

And speaking of fifths... Hey, come on. Lay off, Bart.

What's the matter? Don't you think I'm cool enough?

You see these encyclopedias?

Marge gave me two of them for my birthday last year.

Never open.

I don't have to because I got it all right up here.

Marge is a wonderful girl.

Yeah, she's a real swinger.

When I got back last week, she gave me that.

It's the best ice bucket in the world.

That's what I call really a useful gift.

I knew him, Horatio.

A fellow of infinite jest. Come on, Bart, let's cut all this jazz. What's

matter? Don't you appreciate my acting?

What do you know about acting, anyway?

I'm learning.

Learning what? How to steal somebody else's part? Now, look, let's not start

that again.

I told you it was my agent who sent me up there.

Look, you have no right to read full well, because you're a rotten actor,

You're rotten!

Look who's talking.

Well, at least I know what I'm doing.

I live my roles.

That's the big secret. You gotta feel the part.

With all that booze floating in you, you're too numb to feel anything.

That's a lie. Don't you see my pictures? You know that I can project.

Sure, so do the critics. That's why you're here.

I'm here because I'm right for that.

part, and Wellman knows it.

You couldn't play that part in a million years.

Yeah?

Why not?

Because you haven't got the guts.

It takes guts, feeling, and emotion.

Now listen, Jerry, this, uh, this character's got a temper, hasn't he?

Huh? I visualize him as an emotional type, yes.

Yeah, well, never mind the, uh, never mind the visualize bit. You gotta live

Now, take the scene where he flips his wig.

You mean the one where he chokes his father -in -law?

Yeah, he really means it.

He wants to strangle him.

Here, let me show you. I'm not up on the lines part. Come on. Who needs the

lines? It's the feeling that counts.

You play for real.

You want to show hate, then you think hate. That's the secret.

Here, I'll demonstrate it.

Now, I'm not thinking about any lines now, because I have to explain the real

hate. Hey, come on. Now, now, you feel it, Jerry? The real hate?

Now, because you drink your orange juice like a good boy, and you wake up young

and fresh for the audition, hey, because you're taking my part, Jerry, my last

chance, huh?

Because I hate you, Jerry. Do you feel it, Jerry?

Do you feel it?

Jerry.

Jerry?

Jerry.

Mr. Collins, maid service, Mr. Collins.

I don't need you. Go away.

But it's Friday.

So let it go until Monday.

Don't you even want your bed made and first towel for the bathroom?

Don't worry about the bathroom. I'll clean up the mess in there myself.

Oh, yeah, Marge.

I know you couldn't reach me. I had the phone shut off.

I told you I'd be busy for a couple of days.

Maybe I could see you this afternoon.

Where are you now?

Downstairs in the lobby.

Now, Marge, wait.

Wait!

I was just straightening up.

Sure, you weren't hiding another woman.

Now, where would I hide anyone around here?

Well, you managed to hide yourself pretty good.

Although I didn't expect to see you.

He came with me.

What gives you? Are you two ganging up on me? I couldn't reach you by phone, so

I thought I'd better get in touch through mom. Hey, where are you going?

Powder my nose, if that's all right with you.

Not in there.

Why not?

Bart, have you got somebody hidden?

Nobody. Go ahead.

Hey,

level with me.

What's been happening?

I've just been straightening out, that's all.

By straightening out, you mean getting stiff?

No, Ed, that's finished.

I've sworn off.

Oh, fine.

That's the only thing I was worried about.

Bart, I've got some good news for you.

Let me tell them.

Wellman's changed his mind, darling. He's giving you the part.

We're going to celebrate.

Thank you. It's heavy.

It's full of ice cubes.

Bart, you don't seem too excited by the news. No, I am. I am.

Just stunned, sort of.

Grand Central Station.

Lieutenant Gunnison, special detail.

I'd like to talk to you for a moment.

Oh, come in.

Oh, I didn't realize you had company.

Quite all right, Lieutenant. This is my fiancée, Miss Ridgway.

Agent Ed Bowling?

Lieutenant. Hot day, isn't it?

Tell you why I'm here.

We're checking up on a friend of yours named Jerry Lane.

Jerry? What's the matter?

Is he in trouble?

Well, that's just it, miss. We don't really know.

He seems to have dropped out of sight since last Thursday evening.

His agents asked us to try to locate him.

Well, I wish we could help you, Lieutenant.

Well, maybe you can.

According to reports, you were the last person he was seen with.

Me?

Thursday evening at the Empty Room Cafe.

You and he left there together around 11 o 'clock.

That's right.

Poor guy was so loaded, I had to help him into a cab.

Go on.

That's all. He climbed into a cab and I came home.

You sure Jerry Lane didn't come home with you?

Well, why should he?

Now, you tell me.

I have the night clerk's word for it.

He saw you and another man come in downstairs around midnight last

The other man answers Jerry Lane's description, but nobody's seen Lane come

Well, in that case, Lieutenant, he must still be here.

Why don't you take a look around?

Well, thanks, if you don't mind.

Be my guest.

Bedroom through the alcove.

The bath and the...

Bye.

Jerry wasn't up here, was he? Of course not.

I've been so worried about you lately, I just didn't know what to think.

Well, now you know. I was fighting off the temptation of that demon rum.

It's as simple as that.

I'm glad.

Funny, isn't it?

Here, I spend all my hard -earned money to buy you this beautiful ice bucket,

and then you swear off drinking.

Maybe I'd better take you home with me. No!

I was only kidding.

I want it for sentimental reasons.

Bart, is something wrong?

Bart, I'm worried about Jerry.

Where do you think he disappeared to?

Well, there doesn't seem to be anything here.

Thanks for letting me look around.

Anytime, Lieutenant.

I'll have to have another talk with that night clerk.

Don't lean on him too much. No, we all make mistakes.

Would you care for a drink before you go, Lieutenant?

We're celebrating getting a job.

Well, thanks, but I'm on duty.

You see nobody wants a drink.

Well, I do.

But if you've really sworn off, you'll just have to get used to watching other

people drink.

Sure you won't change your mind, Lieutenant.

After all, it is a celebration.

Just one, Lieutenant.

Well, maybe I will have a glass of ice water.

That isn't too much trouble.

What are you doing?

Just getting some ice for the Lieutenant.

Well, I'll get some ice cubes out of the refrigerator. But, darling, don't you

remember you told me this was... I told you to keep your hands off!

How did you dispose of the rest of the body?

Mr. Blackwood. Mr. Blackwood. This is most upsetting.

Especially to Miss Schmelz. He had a date to take at the dinner after class.

Perhaps you should give me another minute.

Mr. Blackwood.

Next week, we should be back with another story.

As for this incident, I have become philosophical about it.

After all, we may have lost a student, but we have gained a mascot.

Good night.