Original subtitles

Good evening.

This should be a relatively simple task.

Nothing to it, really.

I'm not really hungry, but I resent the implication that I haven't the self

-control to stay on my diet.

Tonight we have fried chicken, cold apple pie, potato salad, a story

entitled The Landlady, and one fast frozen commercial.

It's a crime, Tom.

Just a crime.

Of course it is, Bert.

Burglary's always a crime.

That's not what I mean, man, and you know it. It's Sergeant Billings I'm

about. Why doesn't he take steps?

How he does his best.

I still think somebody ought to call in Scotland Yard. They'd round up the gang.

Gang? Here in Bramley?

Who said anything about a gang?

Just the work of one man, like he's not.

Work, he calls it, the way I see it. We'd all best keep our eyes and ears

and if we notice anything out of the way...

Excuse me, lads.

What can I get you, sir?

I'm just off the train. I was wondering if I could get a bite to eat.

Well, now we've only got some cold beef.

I could make you a sandwich.

That'll do nicely.

And a pint of mild and bitter.

Right, sir.

Rosie.

Yes, Mr. Wilkins.

Beef sandwich for the gentleman.

Yes, sir.

Oh, last drinks, please.

Same again.

Well, I'll have a mild and bitter.

Thank you, Wilkins. Cheers, sir.

There you are.

I can't get it open.

I won't be able to get a lock to it until Monday.

Perhaps I can help.

This might do the trick.

Shall I have a try?

It's a Holloway register.

One of the older models. I think this ought to work.

One, two, three.

Easy as you...

Do come in.

I saw the sign on your wall.

Yes, I know. I saw you looking in.

I was wondering about a room.

I have one all ready for you. Oh, but please come in. It must be chilly

outside on a night like this.

Yes, thank you.

What if I might ask how much you charge?

Five and six a night, including breakfast.

Five and six?

Well, now, if that's a little bit too much, I could perhaps... It's quite all

right. It's very reasonable.

Then you'll stay?

I should like very much to stay, yes.

I knew you would.

The moment I laid eyes on you, I had a feeling, you know.

Well, then, off with your coats.

Just hang it anywhere.

Will this be all right here?

Oh, quite.

Oh, pardon me.

Well, now come along upstairs and I'll show you your room.

You see, we have it all to ourselves.

It isn't very often that I have the pleasure of taking a visitor into my

nest. Oh, but your rates are so reasonable, I should think you'd be

applicants. Oh, I am. Of course I am.

The trouble is, I'm just a teensy bit choosy and particular, if you know what

mean.

Oh, yes. Of course.

I understand there are all sorts of strangers prowling about.

Even burglars.

Oh, my dear boy. Who'd want to harm an old body like me?

No, no. No, no, no, my dear. It isn't that at all.

You see, I have a feeling about people, and I'm always ready to welcome an

acceptable type.

And it's such a pleasure, my dear boy, such a very great pleasure when I see

someone who is exactly right.

Like you.

Well, here I am, nattering away. When it's a room you want, come along.

Do you like it?

The morning sun comes right in this window, Mr. Perkins.

It is Mr.

Perkins, isn't it? No, it's Weaver.

Weaver.

Yes.

Well, just make yourself comfy.

Oh, if you care for anything before you go to bed, perhaps a cup of tea? No,

thank you very much. Not tonight.

Of course.

We shall have all day tomorrow for that, shan't we?

I'm so glad you came.

I was beginning to get worried.

Dear Mr.

Greenslade, you were right in warning me that the Bramley folk might be

suspicious of strangers.

Seems they've had a burglary scare.

I found a very nice place to stay and the rates are quite reasonable.

My landlady seems a bit on the odd side, but she's very hospitable.

I shall report to the branch manager at the bank on Monday morning and take over

my clerical position.

Many thanks for your recommendation.

Come in.

I do hope I'm not disturbing you. No, not at all. I was just finishing a

Oh, splendid.

Let me post it for you.

Oh, no, that's all right. I can do it in the morning. There's no need for you to

run out. I shall be popping around to morning service quite early.

I brought the register for you to sign.

Oh, yes, I forgot to sign it.

Have you penned, dear?

Yes. Where should I sign?

Just there.

Law of the land, you know. And we don't want to go breaking any laws at this

stage of the proceedings, do we?

That's odd.

Odd?

Just look at the other two names on this page.

Christopher Mulholland and Gregory Temple.

Such charming boys.

Those names sound awfully familiar. I'm sure I've heard them somewhere before.

Well, how interesting.

Yes.

Isn't it queer the way names sometimes ring a bell?

Christopher Mulholland and Gregory Temple.

They weren't celebrated in any way, were they?

Celebrated? Oh, no, dear, I don't think so.

They were very handsome, both of them.

Like you.

I see.

This last entry before mine, it's almost two years old.

Oh, dear me.

How time does fly away from us, doesn't it?

Christopher Mulholland, Gregory Temple.

I'm positive I've read those names in a newspaper or somewhere.

Not at the same time, but connected somehow.

Connected with something unpleasant.

Unpleasant? Oh, no, dear.

One thing you can be certain of, my young men were never connected with

unpleasant.

Well, pleasant dreams.

Everything all right?

Splendid, thank you. Oh, good.

Petty but rain.

You won't want to go out today, not in weather like this.

I thought of going to the cinema.

Oh, best wait till the rain stops.

It wouldn't do for you to catch cold.

Oh, dear, no, that would never do at all.

But you've been out, haven't you? Oh, well, I'm used to it. Did you remember

post my letter? Oh, I'm a great one for remembering.

If I do say it myself.

More toast?

No, thank you.

I do wish my memory were better.

Can I get you some jam?

No, please don't bother. This is fine.

Christopher Mulholland and Gregory Temple.

When did they leave here?

Please.

But they never left.

They're up on the third floor.

Both of them together.

But I seem to remember.

Didn't you tell me last night that we were alone?

So we were, dear.

They were out in the evening.

Well, you know what young men are.

One scarcely can keep track.

Then they're here now.

Well, let's find out.

Shall we?

In the hall.

You see, they... They did come back.

I wasn't meaning to be inquisitive.

Oh, of course not, dear.

Well, now I must fly. It's time for our little get -together.

Oh, really?

Every Sunday afternoon, just the three of us.

I owe... I always play the old hymns.

Mr. Temple's favorite is all things bright and beautiful.

What's your favorite hymn, dear?

I really don't have any preference.

Oh, pity.

I think everyone should.

If you'll excuse me.

Gregory.

Michael Rogan.

What's that?

Michael Rogan. That was the young man's name.

What man?

The butcher. The one who's been breaking into all those houses. They captured

him last night. I was tuning in on the wireless in the kitchen and the news

over. I thought that that called for a little celebration.

Milk and sugar, dear.

It's a little early for tea.

It's never too early for a nice cup of tea. You did say milk and sugar, didn't

you, dear?

Oh, is that silly register in your way?

Oh, no, no, no.

I was just

glancing at the... I was glancing at those two names again. Oh?

Yes.

I thought perhaps... Perhaps what, dear?

No, no, nothing.

I was mistaken.

Now, wait a minute. Yes?

Christopher Mulholland.

Isn't that the name of the undergraduate who went on a walking tour in the West

Country and disappeared?

Undergraduate? Oh, no, dear. I don't think that can possibly be right.

Mr. Mulholland was certainly not an undergraduate when he came to me.

Well, come along, dear. Drink up.

having any. Oh, yes.

Yes, indeed.

You know, Mr. Mulholland was always a great one for his cup of tea.

Shouldn't you invite him down?

I'll tell you what.

As soon as you finish that, we'll go up.

I think it's time you met them both.

Could you give me another lump of sugar?

Oh. Of course, dear. And I'll warm up your cup.

I was telling the boys all about you this afternoon, and they are so looking

forward to meeting you.

So just finish that.

We'll go up.

Yes.

Perhaps they can tell me why their names sound so familiar.

Perhaps.

How old are you, dear?

Twenty -two. Twenty -two.

That's a perfect age.

Mr. Mulholland was also 22 when he came here.

But I think that he was a trifle shorter than you.

Now, Mr. Temple, he was actually a little

older. He was 25.

But I never would have guessed it if he hadn't told me, never in my life.

He hadn't a blemish on him anywhere.

What?

He had a skin just like a baby.

Do you know that parrot had me completely fooled?

When I looked at it through the window from the street, I thought it was alive.

Alas, no longer.

It's terribly clever the way it's done.

Who did it?

I did.

Have you met my little Basil as well?

I thought it was asleep.

Appearances can be deceptive, can't they, dear?

Yes, it's so lifelike.

It's awfully difficult to do.

Oh, not in the least.

I stuff all my little pets when they pass away.

Another cup of tea, dear?

No, no, no.

I think quite enough.

Yes.

You did sign the book, didn't you, dear?

Oh, yes.

Oh, good. Because later on, if I forget what you were called, I can always look

it up.

I do that almost every day with Mr. Mulholland and Mr... Mr...

Temple.

Gregory Temple.

Are you sure there haven't been any other guests here in

Ovid? Two years.

No, dear.

Only you.

Listen here, now.

Well, my pet, time to join the other.

So much for our tale of the talkative taxidermist.

Now for a short soliloquy from a super salesman, after which a fast farewell

from a hungry host.

I don't understand it, but I seem to have quite lost my appetite.

That looks real, doesn't it?

It's not.

It's stuffed.

As for our dear landlady, she was eventually caught.

Overconfidence and a flair for exhibitionism led her to make Billy into

rug for her entry hall.

It was excellent for discouraging peddlers and agents, but it was no way

a secret.

Next week we shall return with still another story. Until then, good night.