All language subtitles for 8 Simple Rules s02e10 YMCA

You are watching C -SPAN's continuous
coverage of the longest filibuster in

Senate history.

Rory, would you change the channel?

You're closer to the remote.

I did it last time. Besides, you're in
your prime.

Is that a bug on the TV?

Yep.

Isn't it bad to sit that close to the
screen?

Some people would pick up the bug and
take it outside.

And some people build rockets and go to
the moon.

All right, all right, I'll take care of
it.

You missed him.

I put the fear of God in him.

Oh, hi, everybody.

I can't believe you guys.

You were in the exact positions you were
when I left this morning.

Actually, Grandpa had his hand in his
pants, and Rory had his hand in his

You're right there in the same position.

I just love my new job at the Y.

The most rewarding thing that could
happen to a lifeguard happens to me

This woman was swimming across the pool,
and all of a sudden she started

gasping, wave her arms, and yell, You
look exactly like Pamela Anderson!

Maybe she met your big fake boobs.

I think we should all take a cue from
Bridget. We could join the gym and get

shape. What?

Wait, Mom, my family can't join. I have
friends there. I like this job.

Why are you trying to ruin this for me?

Why are you acting like you're
embarrassed by us?

Oh, I'm not acting.

And the locker rooms are over here.

You'll need to bring your own lock. Oh,
sweetie. Don't call me sweetie. I'm Miss

Hennessy, and you are the Smiths.

Excuse me, Ms.

Hennessy. Look, Bridget, I know this
embarrasses you, but this is the closest

to our house that has a family plan.

And we also have a jacuzzi and sauna,
but old people shouldn't use a sauna

because it can raise your heart rate and
it gives everyone else in there the

willies.

Oh, really?

This is my granddaughter.

Bridget, I'm sorry, but I'm working more
hours now, and I need a place for you

kids to hang out when I'm not home.

We have that place. It's called the
living room.

All right, family, we are here to get
healthy.

Is this a smoky or non -smoky gym?

Dad, I brought you here because I want
you to be around for a long, long time.

And the rest of you, there's lots of
activities to choose from.

Well, I'm going to sit by the pool and
read.

Doesn't sound like exercise to me.

Fine, I'll read the ankle weights on.

Try swimming that way, too.

All right, what about you, smart guy?

My eyes were drawn towards yoga.

You? Yoga?

Oh, but honey, that's another 15 bucks
extra.

Okay, I'll join a gang.

What the hell is all this?

What happened to medicine, balls, and
punching bags?

Actually, I think they keep them down
the hall in the room with the

We'll see after class.

What did I do? What did I do? Can I help
you?

Yeah, well, I'm having a little trouble
turning this on. It's not quite like the

one we got at the Olympic Training
Center.

They're pretty confusing.

Press start.

And now just put in your age and your
weight.

No peekies.

Is that too much for you? It was too
much when I sat down on it.

My name's Holly, and I'm at the front
desk if you need me.

Thank you, Holly.

I'm going to feel that tomorrow.

Nice mat.

Blue.

Oh, you're good.

Okay, class, let's get some of the kinks
out and start with the sun salutation.

And up.

And to under.

And now let's move into the downward
-facing dog.

into Cobra.

And release.

And Cobra.

And release.

And Cobra.

And release.

Let's go into Proud Warrior.

Are you okay?

Are you having trouble with your Proud
Warrior?

Please go away.

Hey, how are the Red Wings doing?

Two points out of first.

Yeah, how are the Pistons doing?

One three in a row.

Hey, what do you think about that big
trade? Fellas, I'm trying to work out

here.

Working up a sweat, Jim? Oh, yeah, no
pain, no gain.

That Holly's a knockout, huh?

I suppose. I haven't really noticed.

Here she comes.

Yeah,

that's quality workout humor.

Hey, uh, I'm Joe.

Bad back ulcer.

Dave, slip this.

high blood pressure.

Jim, you name it, I got it.

Bridget, they're copying your every
move. They're like your mini -me's.

I know. I thought shaping eyebrows was
fun. Shaping minds is so much cooler.

Mr. Work with privileged blonde children
is truly inspiring.

Girls, this is my sister Carrie.

She's got red hair.

Do you guys, like, have the same parent?
Because our dad has a new wife and they

have a baby. And it's Chinese.

Is it like that?

Yes.

Come on.

Hips, abs, and thighs is starting.

You have to get up.

You're not helping.

was in Korea driving Ted Williams the
Flinders Flitter down to Seoul for a

little R &R.

Hey, Jim.

How's the workout going?

Ah, great. I figured exactly how much
weight I can lift before my back goes

She wants you.

No, she doesn't. She's nice to
everybody.

Of course, I have been working out.

Hey, class is ending.

Oh, aerobics class.

Hey, check out the hot blonde.

Oh, hello, guys.

Let's show a little class here.

Oh, I think that's the new lifeguard.

Hey, I wouldn't mind getting a little
PPR action from her.

I

can't

believe you. You punched a guy. Right in
the face.

Dad, I don't approve.

I was defending your daughter's honor
against a man halfway.

His mistake was not staying down.

Tell me about it.

I'm just so embarrassed.

Everyone at work is talking about me. My
boss yelled at me. You ruined my dream

job. God, and now everybody knows you're
related to the Smiths.

Now, Bridget, look. That environment is
no place for a young girl to be working.

Oh, I know, I know. It's dangerous. Old
men fight there.

We don't talk about Old Men Fight Club.

Bridget, you are not going back to that
job.

You're not my parent. You're my
grandparent. You're supposed to give me

and presents and be cute.

Cute? Cute?

Do you know who you're talking to?

Oh, gross, Pat Williams, I know.

All right, all right. I did. All right,
that is enough.

Mom, Grandpa's being completely
unreasonable. I finally got my dream

where I get paid to wear a swimsuit and
sit on...

to keep people from drowning. That's
just a small part of what I do.

I'm not complaining because Grandpa said
so.

Did you hear how she talked to me? I
know. She was rude.

But she's right.

Bridget can take care of herself.

She's keeping the job.

All right, all right. Just spoil it.

You know, I'm the parent, and you are
the grandparent.

Oh, yeah, I forgot.

My job is to be cute.

that being a parent outranks you.

It's kind of like, I'm the Prime
Minister of England, and you're the

What did you just call me?

Dad, stay away from Bridget.

Why on earth makes you think I'd
interfere with her life?

All right, just don't go looking for
trouble. I don't.

Trouble finds me.

Look,

you just hurt yourself talking.

Don't start anything.

God, it's like some bad science fiction
movie.

Let's just put ponds in the pool. Soon
they'll hatch and we'll be invaded by an

army of tiny mutant bridgelets.

I hate ponds like that. They're so
superficial.

Hi, I'm Carrie.

Hi, I'm Vic.

I'm Bridget.

Dad.

You have a beautiful smile.

Listen, you ever give private swim
lessons?

Oh, no, no, no, but there is a swimming
class on Thursday afternoons that is

perfect for your age group. We call it
cocoon.

Actually, I was hoping for a little more
one -on -one.

Know what I mean?

Do I know what you mean, Vic?

Because you're being so subtle, Vic.

You know what, Vic?

They know what you mean.

Girls, come here.

What do we say to the nice man that's
hitting on your lifeguard?

Yeah, right, Vic!

What's your problem, huh? Oh, I don't
have a problem. You're the one hitting

me trying to be on Michael Douglas.

Okay. Sorry.

Michael Douglas.

Michael Douglas.

Some granddaughter you got there, huh?

Yeah, what do you know?

She can't take care of herself.

Damn it.

You sound disappointed.

No, no, no.

I kind of liked it when I thought she
needed me.

So, is that what this is all about?

Well, I did kind of like punching that
guy in the face.

Dad, Bridget can take care of herself
because I taught her.

And I could teach her because you taught
me.

All right. All right.

You're my rock, Dad.

I don't know what I would do without
you. I know I couldn't have made it this

far.

And like I said, I want you to be around
for a long, long time.

So go jump on one of those exercise
bikes and pedal like Holly's watching.

Excuse me.

Could I have a word with you, Buster?

Graham, can I talk to you?

Sure, Roy.

It's kind of embarrassing.

It's something I want to talk to my dad
about.

Come to think of it, I wouldn't have
told him either. Never mind.

No, no, no, no, no, no. Come back here.
Come on, come on.

Okay, what's up?

Well... I've

got this... friend... who keeps showing
up when he's...

not wanted.

Ask him to leave.

I can't. Why not?

He doesn't have any ears.

I mean, he shows up all the time. He's
there in the morning. He's there in the

shower. I mean, I understand why he's
there when Missy Kleinfeld walks by.

But Hunter and I were having
cheeseburgers, and he was there, too.

Oh, yeah, yeah. You know, when I was
your age, my friend was always showing

too. We were like Hope and Crosby.

You do realize I'm talking about my...
Yeah, yeah, yeah, we're talking about

same thing.

Now, what you're going through is
perfectly normal.

How can this be normal? I can barely
walk.

Calm down.

You see, this is what happens with a boy
your age.

Well,

in time, it will pass.

It's a phase.

Eventually, you get married, they go
away completely.

So it's normal.

That's good.

Thanks.

So, what am I supposed to do in the
meantime?

Well, try to avoid any situations where
your friend, you know, would want to...

Ta -da!

Yeah, you know, I'm always telling you
to stand up straight, don't hunch over,

take your hands out of your pockets.

Yeah? Yeah, well...

Hunch over and put them back in.

Cleopatra had dark hair, and Audrey
Hepburn, and Jackie Kennedy Onassa.

Wow, I never knew so many famous women
had brown hair.

See, it doesn't matter what color your
hair is.

What's unforgettable is you.

Hi, Bridget.

I'm sorry, do I know you?

She's in your swim class.

I have a brown -haired girl in my swim
class?

Don't worry, Sarah. That has more to do
with her hair color than it does yours.

Girls.

Um, Carrie, Sarah, I need to talk to
Bridget for a second.

Yeah, I get bored after that, too.

Nothing. See?

Oh, so proud.

You know, we could put that on the
fridge next to Carrie's report card.

How was work today? Oh, it was great. So
much better since Grandpa didn't beat

anybody up.

You know, we're going to really have to
ease up on him a little.

Look, let's just say someone was trying
to hurt one of those little girls that

follows you around.

Anyone who comes near one of my little
chicklets would be so past tense.

Well, that's how your grandfather feels
about you.

He really thought he was protecting you.

Honey, everyone wants to feel needed.

Don't shut him out.

He's one of the good guys.

Yeah, I know.

Um, Mom, are you really going to put
this on the fridge? You're just saying

to make me feel good.

Okay, let's stretch to the right.

And a big stretch to the left.

I think you're smart starting yoga so
young.

I'm here for my osteoporosis.

What's that?

Um, bone law.

Yeah, that's why I'm here, too.

You're adorable.

If only I were younger.

Thank you.

You've got to be kidding me.

You're going to run, but you can't hide.

Yeah, hi, Bridge.

Grandpa?

I need you.

You need me?

Yeah, don't throw a parade or anything,
but I was going to go to the mall, but

that car is making a chugga -chugga
-ping sound.

Yeah, well, maybe it's the oil. Did you
check the oil?

Oh, Grandpa, there's plenty of oil. The
red light that says oil is on all the

time. The red light is on?

What are you thinking? Holy cow, do I
have to do everything around here?

I can't believe it.

Bridget?

There's nothing wrong with the car.

I changed the oil yesterday.

You just sent him out there for nothing.

Nothing? Actually, I drained the oil and
then drove around until that red light

came on and it started making that
chugga -chugga -ping sound. So I sent

out there to make him feel needed. You
are welcome.

Wait, wait, wait a minute. You did what
to my car?

Oh,

there goes the toenail.

What the hell did I do with my other
shoe?

Kate, it's your nephew, CJ.

Hi. Uh, sorry I missed you. Listen, uh,
good news. Looks like I'm gonna be

heading out your way soon.

Yeah, in about, uh, oh, one to six days.

So I can't wait to see you.

Okay, bye.

Oh, I should have told her about my van.

Hey, brother, got any change?

When I saw that dude give you a quarter,
don't be tight.

Pay it forward.