All language subtitles for diffrent_strokes_s05e05_substitute_teacher

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And this is your assignment for
tomorrow, so read these two chapters on

Two chapters in one night?

Why don't we just ask this to build a
pyramid?

I heard that, Arnold. If you don't think
that's enough homework, I can throw in

the Roman Empire.

No, no.

Egypt will be just fine.

Arnold. I don't believe it. The woman
has mirrors on her ears.

Now, class, I have an announcement to
make.

At recess today, I was informed that I
have to attend a teacher's conference

the rest of the week. So, after lunch
today, a substitute teacher will be

filling in for me.

I can see you're all overcome with
grief.

Who's the substitute teacher, Michelle?

Mrs. Rifkin, she substituted for me last
year.

Isn't Mrs. Rifkin the old lady with the
hearing aid? She had bad eyesight, too.

Bad ears, bad eyes. That's my kind of
teacher.

Now, class, your assignments for the
next week are on the board, so have a

lunch and please be nice to Mrs. Rifkin.
All right, I'll see you guys next week.

The rest of the week's going to be a
vacation.

Mrs. Rifkin is a pushover.

Yes. God bless her great, balding little
head.

That was so good. That was beautiful.

That's right. I need it. It's against
the rules to have bubble gum in class.

So what? We got Mrs. Rifkin. Not to you,
old chump.

Now I can catch up on my important
reading.

I've just got to find out what happened.
What happened to Spider -Man when he

ate those nuclear lima beans?

Hey, we wouldn't want Mrs. Riskin to
strain her dear old eyes reading Miss

Chung's assignments, would we?

Oh, no, we wouldn't want that.

Yeah, let's think of it as a good deed
for the day.

Why are you erasing the blackboard?

Uh, we were just helping out the
janitors.

If you're looking for Miss Rifkin, she's
not here yet. I'm afraid she won't be

here. She's ill.

I'll be your substitute teacher.

What you talking about, mister?

I'll be with you for the rest of the
week.

name is Mr. Wilkes, and I'm sure we're
going to get along just fine.

I'm strict, but I'm fair.

Are there any questions?

Uh, yes, sir.

How come you're teaching instead of
playing basketball?

Well, actually, I did play pro ball for
a while, but I had to stop.

What happened? Your head kept getting
caught in the net?

Sometimes.

Actually, I had a knee injury.

Anyway, I had a very good education to
fall back on.

What a break for us.

I believe in study.

The more work I can give you, the
happier I'll be.

How happy you plan on getting?

For starters, I want you to do some
reading tonight.

Miss Chung never said we had to do any
reading while she was away. Right, guys?

Well,

shame on her.

I want you to read the first three
chapters on Egypt.

Miss Chung said we only...

I thought as much.

Okay, let's get going.

Arnold, this guy's trouble.

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Drummond residence.

He's having dinner.

Oh. Well, if it's an emergency, it's for
Arnold.

It's for you, Arnold.

It's Dudley. He wants to talk to you
about Egypt and that rat Sphinx who's

teaching it.

Thanks, Pearl.

Hi, Dudley. Make it fast.

Pearl's got her apron in an uproar.

All this homework is killing me.

How about you?

Yeah, it's ruining my life.

I'm going to miss a great horror movie,
The Best Little Maniac in Texas.

I don't know if I'm going to make it
through the week, Arnold. We just got to

something about that guy.

He really bugs me.

Hey, maybe that's it.

If he's going to bug us, why can't we
bug him right back?

You know, make his life miserable.

That's a good idea.

Just off the top, you got any thoughts?

Not now, Dudley.

I can't T -A -L -T.

We can discuss it on the way to school
tomorrow.

Okay. I'll tell you one thing, though.
Since he likes Egypt so much, I'd like

get him a one -way ticket and a room in
a tomb.

Me and I didn't finish all the homework,
but everybody knows I'm the smartest

kid in class.

Here he comes.

Y 'all know what to do.

All right.

Good morning, class.

Good morning, Mr. Wilkes.

Well, I'm glad to see we're all bright
-eyed and bushy -tailed and ready to do

some heavy -duty studying.

We sure are.

I can honestly say, Mr. Wilkes, we
couldn't wait to get into class today.

Good. A little work is stimulating,
isn't it? I knew you'd love Egypt.

Now, would you open your history books,
please?

this morning.

Now, as you've learned, the Nile is the
only waterway in Egypt.

Let's take a look at it on the map.

The Nile is located in a rich, fertile
valley with

lots of curves.

Well, class, I want to thank you for
spicing up my morning like this.

Thanks. I'll carry it in my wallet.

Nothing bothers this guy.

They should put his face on Mount
Rushmore.

I'll bet this one gets him.

The Nile runs through Egypt to the
Mediterranean Sea.

It's 4 ,160 miles long from its
headwaters in Uganda to its delta in

Egypt. What are you doing, Arnold?

Thought maybe you wanted me to pass out
some paper.

What for?

So we can draw our own maps.

That's good thinking.

What's this?

Looks like somebody gave you a present.

Isn't that pretty?

I like that.

I'm really sorry I hit you, but you kind
of had it coming for fooling around

like that.

All right, class, that's enough of this
Three Stooges routine.

If I hear any more of it, I'm going to
slam dunk each of you in the

Maybe three chapters wasn't enough for
you last night.

Tonight we'll make it four.

I'll be right back. You can start on
that assignment now.

Educated to death.

We've got to get him out of here, guys.

I'll say.

Hey, wait a minute.

What's the worst thing a teacher can do?

Show up in the morning.

No, hit a student.

I'd like to volunteer you.

He already hit someone.

Arnold. That was just an accident.

Are you sure?

Are you sure, Robbie?

Nope, I'm not sure.

See, we're not sure.

What makes you think you're so sure?

I didn't say I was sure.

So why don't we just tell the principal
at the school that Mr. Wilkes slapped

you? By tomorrow, he'll be just a tall,
black memory.

Well, I don't know.

Come on, Arnold.

You're our salvation.

Yeah, you're going to leave this out of
Egypt.

Oh, all right.

And when that turkey's gone, this is
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A BEP.

Hello? Yes, he is. Just a minute,
please.

Daddy!

Did I hear your bell -like tones?

It's for you. It's Arnold's principal,
Mr. Langford. Oh, thanks.

Hello, Mr. Langford.

No, I haven't spoken to Arnold. He's not
home yet.

Slapped him?

Are you serious?

Well, I don't care what that teacher
said. There's no excuse for laying hand

a child.

Yeah, well, I'd like to get to the
bottom of it, too.

First thing tomorrow morning, that'll be
fine.

I'll see you then.

By the way, thanks for calling.

Yeah, goodbye.

Damn, that makes me mad.

Why would a nice lady like Miss Chung
slap Arnold?

No, it was a substitute teacher.

How dare he lay a hand on Arnold?

Nobody's slapping my little brother
around.

What did Arnold do?

Well, that's one of the things I intend
to find out. Now, the teacher says it

was an accident, but the kids in
Arnold's class said it wasn't.

I'll go with you tomorrow, Mr. Drummond.

I'm going, too, to give him a root canal
in my fist.

Now, now, calm down, you two.

I know how to handle bullies.

He won't be so free with his hands when
he sees someone my size.

He sure ought to be taught a lesson,
Daddy.

Hey, Arnold.

Arnold, are you all right?

All the parts are working.

You want to kick my tires?

The principal called about what happened
in class.

Oh?

Come and sit over here.

Now, I want you to tell me exactly what
happened.

Well, we were just fooling around a
little.

You know, like we always do to a
substitute, to try and discourage him.

You understand your stuff, right?
Dropping books, chalking the chair.

Well, there's nothing wrong with that.
We've all done it.

But he got so steamed, he jumped up and
slapped me. You poor baby.

Boy, did it sting.

I felt a tear coming, but I didn't want
to give him the satisfaction.

So I sucked it back into my eyeball.

Now, Arnold, you know that I do not
condone fooling around in class.

But he had no right to slap you.

I'm going to confront this Mr.

Wilkes tomorrow morning before school.

Uh, is that necessary, Dad?

I mean, you know what they say.

To forgive is divine, and to know when
to duck is even better.

That's a very fine attitude, Arnold, but
that teacher has gone too far. I'm

going to go down there, and you're going
to come with me.

Do I have to?

Arnold, there is nothing to be afraid of
once you've told the truth.

That's right, brah.

Hello, Dudley? It's Arnold.

What's up?

We've got a problem. The principal just
called my dad, and he's taking me to see

Mr. Wilkes in the morning.

Oh, I wouldn't want to be in your shoes,
Arnold.

You won't have to, because you're going
to be there in your own shoes.

What do you mean?

Well, it was your idea.

You're my witness. You've got to back me
up. I'll be way back, right here in my

living room.

Dudley, you're going to be there, and
that's that.

Well, okay.

But what am I supposed to say?

You saw everything that happened, didn't
you?

Yeah. Well, forget all that and make
something up.

Mr. Wilkes, this is Philip Drummond,
Arnold's father.

Nice to meet you.

I ought to slap your face just the way
you did my son's.

Not really, Mr. Drummond.

Look, this is just a misunderstanding.

It was just an accident.

That's what we're here to find out.

Why don't we get started?

Do you have a seat over there, please?
All right.

Now, Dudley, you were a witness.

I'd like for you to repeat what you told
me in my office.

Well, like I said, Arnold was telling
him it's the Wilkes, and the next thing

you know, pow, right in the kisser.

Like Godzilla swatting a fly.

You're only telling half the truth,
Dudley.

When I opened the can and the snakes
jumped out, I was startled, and my hand

accidentally glanced off Arnold's cheek.

Accidentally my foot.

You can sit down, Dudley.

Arnold, I'd like to hear from you.

Uh, could Dudley and I please have a
little confab?

Well, for what reason?

So we can get our facts together so we
can give you the straight story.

That sounds reasonable.

All right, go ahead.

Dudley, now that I'm here, I don't like
the way things are going.

Don't blow it now. We're just supposed
to have them out of our class.

I don't know if I can lie like you.

That's okay.

Lie your own way.

I'll try.

Arnold, we're waiting.

Well... Well, it was like Dudley said,
only

worse. I didn't even see it coming.

All I heard was a whistling sound.

Then, wham!

It was like getting hit in the face with
a side of beef.

I can't believe what I'm hearing.

Are you accusing my son of lying?

I'm saying he's not telling the whole
story.

There is more.

After he hit me, he said, I had it
coming.

Did you actually say that, Mr. Wilkes?

Well, yes.

But what I meant was it's wrong to fool
around because things can get out of

hand. Oh, yeah. I'd say slapping a child
is way out of hand.

Look, Mr. Drummond, I've been teaching
school for quite a few years, and I've

never struck a child.

Mr. Wilkes.

I happen to have your record here.

And unfortunately, this isn't the first
time you've hit a student.

What?

You mean you would permit a teacher in
the sixth grade classroom who has a

record of hitting children?

Now, just a minute, Mr. Drummond. That
was a completely different matter. It

a high school.

Older kids.

One of them was high on drugs and acting
crazy.

I had to slap him and subdue him until
he pulled out of it. And if you look on

my record, I was exonerated for that.

But in light of what I've just heard, I
don't know if you should have been.

Well, obviously the man doesn't know how
to handle children.

Mr. Wilkes, I'm afraid I have no choice
but to recommend that you be suspended

from teaching school in this city. Good.

These boys aren't telling the truth.

I don't know why, but they're not.

You've got to believe me.

You can't throw away my whole career for
something I didn't do. Mr. Wilkes, I've

made not my decision.

This meeting's over.

Excuse me, Mr.

Langford? Yes, Arnold.

Could Dudley and I please have another
conference?

Arnold, is it pertinent?

Yeah, and it has a lot to do with what's
going on here.

Go ahead.

Look, we only wanted him out of our
hair, not out of a job.

I know.

He's going to wind up a bum on Skid Row.

And he doesn't look too good now.

I'm going to tell the truth, Dudley.

But Arnold, if you tell him that you
lied, you'll get thrown out of school.

I'll tell him you put me up to it.

Yeah, I guess we'll have to tell him.

So we'll end up on Skid Row instead of
him.

Arnold, what is going on between you
two?

I have a very uncomfortable feeling that
there's something that you two are not

telling us.

Will did.

I thought so.

All right.

Start telling.

Well, it appears that Dudley and I have
made a minor error in judgment.

Are you saying that you've been lying
about Mr. Wilkes? No, we never actually

lied. We just kind of wiped our feet on
the truth.

What about the slap?

Was that an accident?

He was sure beginning to look that way.

We were kind of mad at Mr. Wilkes
because he kept piling on so much

That's a teacher's job, fellas.

If there's one thing I've learned, it's
the value of a good education.

It sure saved my life.

This is just awful.

I don't quite know what to say to you,
Mr. Wilkes.

I'm just terribly embarrassed about
this.

You should be.

I can stay and write I'm sorry on the
blackboard 500 times.

That's all right.

100 will be enough.

It's okay, Mr. Drummond. I know what it
means to be a concerned father.

I happen to be one myself.

Well, gentlemen, I'm sure glad we got
down to the bottom of this.

You're glad?

We're really sorry, Mr. Wilkes. We
didn't mean to get you into so much

I was in over my head, which for me is
easy.

fellas. That's nice of you.

But we also have to pay for it.

Uh -oh.

You can look forward to some very
special assignments just for the two of

And I hope you boys realize that you're
in line for punishment by my office,

too. And when you're finished there, you
can get into my line,

Arnold.

That's gonna be a long line.

I'm not quite sure how to punish you for
this one, Arnold.

It's gonna be a biggie, huh?

Yeah, very biggie.

Mr. Wilkes, I just saved your butt. How
about saving mine?

Nothing but the truth.

Nothing but the genes that they got.

Different strokes to take. Different
strokes to take.

Different strokes to move the world.

Everybody's got a special kind of story.

Everybody finds a way to shine.

It don't matter that you got not a lot.
So what? I'll have theirs and you'll

have yours and I'll have mine.

And together we'll be fine. Because it
takes different strokes to...

Yes,

I'm listening, but you're not saying
much.

Good morning.

Good morning, Arnold.

Are you hungry?

Oh, man.

I can smell Pearl's pancakes all the way
upstairs.

Where are they?

Pearl's got them.

Gorillas, you call movers, chipped my
dish. It was a genuine antique.

Now it looks a hundred years old.

Sorry about this, folks.

Yes, I'm listening.

At least you left me a plate to lick.

You want me to talk to him, Pearl?

No, I've got things under control.

Eighty -five dollars?

You, sir, are a jerk.

He's impossible.

You talk to him. Oh, sure. He ought to
be easy now you've got him softened up.

I'm Philip Drummond.

No, no, I'm not her lawyer. I'm just a
guy who's trying to get his pancakes.