Original subtitles

Last time on Dear John.

So, Kate, what is this big news?

Mitch and I are opening a restaurant.

Yay! Yeah, we're calling it Kate's Place.

Hey, look. Whoa.

It's a credit card. That is not a credit card. Yeah, it is. It is not a credit

card. It is not a credit card. It is not a credit card. That's the devil.

It came in the mail this afternoon.

It has a $10 ,000 limit. Well, that's great.

That is great. It is not great. It is not great.

It's part of their evil plan.

Look at this.

I'm maxed out on all my other credit cards. And what do they do? They send me

another one.

They want to suck me in even more.

These people know what they're doing. They know I can use this to pay my

to pay the IRS, even to pay for my alimony. And where does it get me?

Deeper in debt and hoping desperately for another credit card.

Boy, did I just save us a lot of money on our laundry bill. Kirk made a deal

with his dry cleaners. They're giving him $4 ,000 worth of free laundry. In

exchange for the laundry, I cut him in on a small piece of the restaurant. Oh,

no, no.

My partners!

Hey, hey, hey, what are you people doing?

Bartender, everything is on me tonight. Here, put it on my car. Put it on my

car.

the time.

before a studio audience.

Mary Beth, thanks a lot for helping me pick out those earrings for Jennifer.

Oh, my pleasure. If there's one thing I know, it's precious gems.

Well, I really appreciate it. My pleasure.

Mary Beth, I know I said this before, but can I have them back?

Sorry, John.

Of course I have it. Do I smell expensive

jewelry? No, it's just a little...

Gift for Jennifer.

Whoa, they are beautiful.

Yes, they're just two grand.

Well, actually, they're closer to three grand.

Whoa!

Looks like somebody's given his new credit card a workout.

No, no, no, don't worry about me. I've consolidated my debts. I'm finally able

to live like a human being again.

John, are you sure you know what you're doing?

Consolidate sounds like a fancy word. The word for getting deeper into debt.

Now, look, Louise, I'm an adult. I know what I'm doing, okay?

Well, be careful.

The credit card ruined my third husband.

Oh, he ran it over his limit, huh?

No, he was a cat burglar. Left it in the door jam.

Miss, we ordered over 20 minutes ago. I got it right here.

Oh, good. We're starving. Kate, Kate. Just the person I wanted to see.

Kate, I know that I've been screwing up, but I promise from now on I am going to

be the best waitress you ever saw.

Miss, can we have our soup?

Just a second. I'm talking here.

Annie, give them their soup. I will, I will. Now, I realize why you were mad at

me before, and I deserved it. You were right. I was irresponsible.

I was late. I took breaks whenever I wanted. Miss, we want our soup, and we

it now.

You know, you're very rude. Annie!

I'm terribly sorry. Now, who had the barley, and who had the cream of

We both ordered the split pea.

Oh, right, that's not for them. It's for that couple.

Oh, I guess they left already.

Jennifer, I really do love your earrings.

Well, I'm glad you have such great taste. I love them. I love them, too.

So, could I please have them back now?

Sorry I took so long, Mary Beth. A little problem at the office.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Are you ready to sample some of our world

-famous Epicurean delight?

Kurt, we just came by for cocktails.

Oh, in that case, drink up. We sell them. We don't rent them.

Hi, Richard Simon. Kirk Morris, your host and principal part owner.

Pleased to meet you.

Listen, Mary Beth, we better get going. I'll go grab our coats.

Mary Beth, thanks a lot for bringing in a freeloader tonight. Next time, try

some guy who's going to at least spring for dinner.

You better be nice to him.

Richard happens to be a restaurant critic for the Long Island Daily.

Oh, yeah, look, I'm really going to be impressed by that.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go make sure Richard gets himself a nice

coat.

Here's your check. Oh, John, Richard says he wants to pay you. Don't be

Tonight is on me.

Oh, thanks.

Oh, guess what, Kate?

Richard told me he's going to come back next week to review the restaurant.

Oh, that is so wonderful.

Oh, a good review from Richard could really put this place on the map.

So, I got tired of running all these fancy fourth -star restaurants

Europe, you know, seeing the same old faces all the time.

King so -and -so, queen this or that, duke hoo -ha -ha.

I needed a change, and I felt like I was losing touch with the common man.

So I opened this joint.

Well, I'm certainly looking forward to coming back next Friday and reviewing

place.

Say no more.

Red, tell Calvin to give me a hundred bucks.

For what? Would you hurry up? I've got to bribe a restaurant critic.

Good night, y 'all. Well, good night.

Look at what you did now. Now I have to mail it to her.

That is it. That's it.

I have had it. I am sick and tired of you doing everything in your power to

this restaurant. What are you talking about?

Pitting on every woman that walks in here. Not getting in everyone's way. And

now you're resorting to bribery. Well, that is it. You are out.

What are you talking about? You can't do that. I'm a partner. It's because of me

you get the free laundry service.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah. Well, maybe I'll just take my dirty laundry and leave.

It's fine by me.

Fine. Uh, excuse me.

Oh,

no, what's going on here? She just ate 60. Shh.

Why? Because he's making a shambles. Hey, get out!

Get out. I made him a partner, and I don't care what he did. He's a partner.

can't believe you're taking his... I'm sorry I'm a man of my word. Thank you,

Curtis. I owe you one. Good, because I need a partner in the kitchen.

Oh, uh, a little advice on a recipe?

Nope. Leo the dishwasher sobered up and he quit.

Yeah, like these hands are gonna wash dishes.

Oh, you kill me, bro.

Oh, Jake, we got a problem.

Your friend John's credit card got turned down.

Well, run it through again.

I already did.

He's over his limit.

Let me tell him. He's used to getting bad news from me.

John, take this.

Your money's no good here.

Oh, thanks very much, but I really want to pay. No, I mean your money is no good

here.

John, it seems your credit card's been refused. You're over your limit.

What? This card has a $10 ,000 credit line.

No need to feel embarrassed, John. Why don't you come with me and we'll

straighten everything out in the kitchen.

No problem. You wash, he'll dry.

Ladies and gentlemen, here from Montreal, Cecilia...

So after 20

years of teaching, what have I got to show for it?

I make $32 ,000 a year and I'm in hock up to my eyeballs.

Then I turned on the television set last night, and there it is, the answer to

my problems.

All right, John, you're going to truck driver school.

No, no, Kirk, I was watching the news.

Another major airline just goes belly up, $63 million in debt. They pick up

phone, they declare bankruptcy, and their problems are over.

So you lay off a couple of thousand workers, you don't pay your debt. But

that's the American way.

That's the way it's done. So I figure if they can do it, so can I.

John, I had a friend who went through bankruptcy, and it made her life a

hell. Your privacy will become a thing of the past. I know, I know. My lawyer

warned me I'll be living in a fishbowl. But I don't care. That's a great weight

off my mind.

Don't say anything.

Don't say anything. Just put on your coats and follow me.

Kay, what's all this about?

Oh, Mary Beth's boyfriend is coming by to review the restaurant tonight, and

I've only got one reservation, and that's...

You wouldn't have to worry about that review if you let me grease that guy's

palm.

Oh, stop talking and let's get over it. All right, you've got to do this.

Oh, and if you could tell some of the other people in the community center, I

would really appreciate it. Tell them everything is on the house.

All right. Okay, listen, I'm going to go home first and get all dressed up and

call Jennifer.

I'm going to make this a night of celebration.

Oh, what are you celebrating?

I'm going bankrupt.

What are you doing here? You're supposed to be on your way to the restaurant

with Richard. Don't even mention that creep's name to me.

Oh, no.

No. No.

No.

Oh, I'm sorry, Kate, but I just had to break it off.

He's insensitive, he's self -centered, and he's opinionated.

Plus, he's taken me to so many restaurants, I've gained two pounds.

No man's worth that.

This is great. This is just great. Now, we're never going to get that review.

Oh, he'll be there.

He will?

Yeah, but I'm warning you, he's going to be in a rotten mood, especially to my

friends. Oh, no.

Mary Beth, you cannot do this to me and Kate.

You... You got to call good old Richard, okay? You got to tell him that you

changed your mind.

Um, invite him over to your place.

Let him have his way with you.

Then you take him to the restaurant, he writes a great review, and then you

break up with him.

Mark, are you suggesting that Mary Beth leave with him just so our restaurant

gets a good review?

Yeah.

And the devil, you.

You're going to go to that restaurant and have a good time.

You deserve it.

Oh, you're declaring bankruptcy.

Who cares what people think?

Hi. I have a 9 .30 reservation.

Ah, yes, here it is, Mr.

Deadbeat.

I'll just sit at the bar.

Sir, let's think about this for a moment.

Can you really afford a drink?

No, I'm just looking.

I'm terribly sorry, very sorry.

I didn't mean that.

to hear before everybody in the world knows about me.

Mr. Lacey, Mr. Lacey, can we have a word with you?

Uh, well, I, uh... This is Deborah Saunders reporting live to everyone

the world for Global Cable News.

Mr. Lacey, the entire Earth would like to know how you could be so

and stupid that you would descend into financial chaos.

No, I blew in, please.

Bankruptcy.

May I have your attention, please?

Kate's Place is proud to present...

John's girlfriend, Jennifer!

Yeah!

Thank you.

Thank you very much.

I'd like to dedicate this song to a man who really, really let me down.

Mr. John, can you spare a dime, Lacey?

My man John will have to change his name.

Haven't lost his little credit game.

Everybody. John is bankrupt.

John is bankrupt.

He's flat broke.

What a joke.

Oh, it's very funny.

John is out of money. Even Kirk isn't such a jerk.

Waitress, more ketchup, please.

Richard, is everything all right?

Everything is all right. But could you have your shills? Hold it down.

Shills?

Stay away from the little old you.

So, how's the food?

Oh, everything tastes much better now that you're here.

Well, here.

All right, we are in.

I can't believe I asked Mary Beth to do this. I feel so low, so filthy, so

disgusting.

Kirk, how do you handle it?

Lighten up, will you? Right now, Mary Beth is saving our collective buttons.

Excuse me.

Come on, baby, you've got to try this. This is delicious.

Oh, no thanks.

I just want to watch you enjoy yourself, like I always do.

Is everything okay?

Oh, it's extraordinary.

Mary Beth, may I speak to you for just a moment?

Excuse me.

I didn't ask you to do something like this just to save our restaurant.

Oh, don't worry.

Richard's so crazy about this place, he's gonna write a good review even

turn him down.

You mean you're not gonna sleep with him?

Well, your restaurant's good, but it's not that good.

Look, Curtis, look at that guy eat. Did you ever see a guy enjoy a meal like

that before?

Yeah, look like we're gonna be home.

When this review comes out, it is gonna be franchise time. Why not? You, me, and

Kate got a great team going here.

Yeah, we'll have a Kate's Place in Miami, Chicago, Beverly Hills.

Come to think of it, we really don't need Kate.

Here's your dessert.

Our specialty, blonde a la Curtis.

Ooh, that looks delicious.

By the way, you look very familiar.

Do I know you from someplace?

Yeah, I'm your waitress.

From before.

Somewhere before.

Are you an actress?

Yes.

I'm between roles right now.

I'm flattered that you remember me.

Well, before I was a restaurant critic, I was a theater critic.

Wait a minute, I know.

I saw you off -Broadway in the Fantastics.

Oh, yeah.

Richard Simon. I remember your review.

You said...

The little blonde with the beady eyes and the squeaky voice should look

to a long career as a waitress.

See? I was right.

not really going to hold this little flan incident against us, are you?

Of course I am.

Great. This is just great.

There go the franchises.

Oh, and I had such big plans for you and me.

You and me?

Yeah. Who needs Curtis?

John, you've been a little preoccupied all night, have you?

Anything you want to talk to me about?

Well, I thought I'd wait till after dinner.

No, come on. Tell me now.

People who care about each other talk things over.

Well, the truth of the matter is, I'm broke.

John, that's terrible.

I know.

I guess once I got that credit card, I went nuts.

With the ski weekend and the limos and those earrings.

They're all on credit.

going to do?

Well, I thought I'd file for bankruptcy, but I can't live with that.

I'll get a part -time job. I'll work nights and weekends.

It'll be rough, but I have to live up to my responsibilities.

And Jennifer, I'm really going to need the support of a very understanding

woman. And John, you certainly are.

And good luck finding one.

Maybe I didn't make myself clear.

Goodbye, John.

John, I'm so sorry.

Well, it's okay.

No hard feelings?

No. No hard feelings.

Hey, how about a goodbye kiss?

I can't believe this review, especially after what happened.

Richard loved everything about our restaurant. The ambiance, the food.

He even loved the service. I guess that guy does have integrity after all.

Kate, I gotta confess.

Kirk and I gave him a $200 bribe.

You did what?

I gave him $300.

I talked to my ex -wife last night.

Well, she went this time. That woman has an amazing mind.

Somehow, Wendy was able to figure out that the reason that Matthew was doing

poorly in algebra is that she doesn't have a maid.

Makes sense to me.

Please, honey, are you looking for me? Yes, love, I've got a big surprise for

you. I'll be right back.

Last time she said that, she came back an hour later with her sweater on

backwards.