All language subtitles for dear_john_s03e05_thats_big_of_me

Anyway, I was in this coffee shop on the
Northern Boulevard.

This guy was telling me about the one
-to -one club. I figured I'd give it a

try, and here I am.

What a marvelous story.

Moving, yet so whimsical.

Hey, Petal.

What is it you do for a living, Jason?

I'm a freelance photographer.

Oh. Oh, that is absolutely fascinating.

My Tom here takes pictures, too.

Problem is, we can't get anyone to
develop them.

You were saying, Jason?

Oh, right. Well, um, I love my work.

It takes me all around the world.

I was in Beijing for the riots, in
Helsinki for the summit.

I had a great time in Berlin when the
wall was being torn down. Oh, I'd love

see those pictures.

Unfortunately, I didn't get any.

Well, I got so carried away with the
emotion of the moment that I put my

down. I climbed up on the wall, chipped
off a huge chunk, and tossed it as far

as I could.

My, you're impulsive.

And it landed on an East German border
guard.

So I spent the next two weeks taking
pictures of the inside of my cell.

Oh, what an incredible story.

I just love a man who... I'll make fresh
coffee.

And that's without steroids.

Oh, boy, what a workout. What a workout.
I was proud of you, buddy.

Oh, they try to get me to take it easy
because I haven't done it for a while.

But I'm telling you, I have never felt
better in my life.

I got this tiny little spot right here.

Oh, forgive me.

Will we have a guest?

Yes. Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet
Jason Fowler. Jason, this is John.

such an exciting job?

If you're into exciting, I'm not.

So, Jason, what brings you to the one
-to -one club? Yeah, what looped your

luxurials?

Well, I, uh, I guess the bottom line is
that, uh, my wife and I just grew

apart. I don't know, Jason. Sounds to me
like it was all her fault.

No, it was no one's fault, really.

She's a terrific lady.

That's a very healthy attitude. You
know, Jason, sometimes it's better to

recognize the inevitable than to stay in
an unbearable marriage.

I've never looked at it that way before.

It's very perceptive of you, Louise.

Uh, Louise, can you massage my shoulder?

John, do I look like a masseuse?

Oh, I'm sorry.

I didn't realize.

Well, don't be. It felt great.

It did, didn't it?

I don't know about you guys, but I miss
being married.

I love the whole idea of marriage.

I may not sound very macho to say this,
but I love the idea of needing a woman

and having a woman need me.

Yeah.

I feel the same way.

Me too.

I'm going to say something here.

It may surprise a lot of people in this
room.

What's that, Kirk?

You guys are pathetic.

And I think the truly exciting thing
about photography is that you never know

when you're going to get that truly
great picture. I mean, a second too

second too late, you've blown it.

But when you get it just right, it's
better than skydiving.

Have you ever tried skydiving?

Me? Oh, no, I'm afraid I'm not the
skydiving type.

I am.

What is that?

My organizer.

Jeremy's going to kill me. I was
supposed to pick him up over an hour

We're going to the Caribbean.

Which island?

Oh, no, no, no. The Caribbean's a new
nightclub in Soho.

I hardly ever leave the country on the
first date.

I loved your story about whatever it was
you were talking about.

Bye, y 'all.

Can I get anyone another drink?

Sure, why not? Not for me, thanks.

Be right back.

He's nice?

I suppose.

If you don't mind, perfect.

Listen, Kate, if you're interested in...
Oh, thanks, but he's not interested in

me. I saw the way he was looking at you.

Looking at me? Yes.

If he's interested in anyone, it's you.
Oh, no, he's not.

Listen to us. We sound like a couple of
silly schoolgirls. Where are you going?

Go stuff some Kleenex in my bra.

Whoa! All right, Ralphie!

Yeah,

my shoulder's starting to feel a lot
better now. Good.

Oh, John. What? Don't look now, but the
redhead at the bar is really checking

you out.

Oh, yeah?

What,

the shoulder again?

No, shoulder's fine.

Neck's paralyzed.

Sorry. Can Kate leave?

What's your latest assignment?

Well, I've got a couple of weeks off, so
I'm taking a cooking class.

French. I simply adore French food.

Well, I'm no gourmet chef, but how about
I fix us both dinner tomorrow night?

Oh, no, I wasn't fishing for an
invitation.

I mean, you must think I'm really... Oh,
I'm so embarrassed.

Shall I pick you up at seven?

Make it 6 .45.

I'd better get going or my babysitter's
going to kill me.

Oh, you didn't mention that you had
children.

I didn't.

We're love kids.

Lucky you, I have one.

Here's my address.

Ta -ta.

Where's Louise off to? She said
something about a babysitter.

What? What are you smiling about?

Oh, I was just picturing you up on the
Berlin Wall celebrating like that.

God, I'm jealous. I wish I could be that
spontaneous.

What's stopping you?

Simple. I don't know where to start.

What time is it?

Eleven o 'clock.

Perfect. The clams will just be waking
up. The who?

Why don't we go out to Long Island and
dig up some clams?

Now? Well, that's how spontaneous works.

But this is crazy.

Of course it's crazy. What do you say?

Well... Yeah, all right, let's go. Good.

You know, this may come as a surprise to
you, but I've never done this before.

Good. Makes two of us.

Bye, guys.

Where are you going?

Where do you think I'm going? It's 11 o
'clock. The clams are waking up.

Boy.

Things you can learn in a bar about
shellfish.

Hey, John.

I've got someone here who would like to
meet you. Oh. Hi. Hi.

I'm Mindy. Yeah, hi.

Your friend here tells me that you're a
bodybuilder.

Well,

I mean, sort of a little hobby of mine.

Hobby?

Listen to him. This man is so modest. I
mean... Did you see the movie Pumping

Iron? Oh, no, I didn't, but... Oh, I'm
sorry. No, no, no, please allow me.

It's nice meeting you.

And now, if you'll excuse me, I have to
go ring the bells.

Oh.

Oh, Jason.

These pictures you took of my little
Nigel are adorable.

How could I miss?

He's such a cute kid.

I feel so guilty.

This is the third time you've cooked for
me and I haven't made dinner for you

once. Hey, it's my fun. I enjoy it.

Looks delicious.

What is it?

Well, it's a new beef dish that I
created especially for you.

I call it Earth Louise.

ever named Meat after me.

To... To the most incredibly enticing
woman I have ever met.

Me?

Very well.

Louise, I know we hardly know each
other. Oh, pish -tosh.

We've seen each other almost every night
for a whole week.

I just don't want you to think I'm
rushing things.

Who cares what I think?

Oh, God, you are so beautiful and so
alive.

I can't help myself. I can't help
myself.

Relax.

You won't change your mind once you've
had a chance to think about it? No, of

course not.

I'll even let you make me breakfast.

Then marry me, Louise.

Marry me.

No, by the power vested in me by the
state of Maryland.

I now pronounce you husband and wife.

You may kiss the bride.

Oh, why, why, why did I ever let you
guys talk me into going back to that

Oh, I want to die.

I get you have.

My cousin?

Your cousin?

Yeah. She walk on your back.

Every muscle, every joint, every nerve
ending, every tissue, every molecule in

my body hates me.

Even my watch hurts.

Oh, John, that's terrible.

But if it'll make you feel any better, I
bought a new earring.

What do you think?

Thank you very much, very much.

I think I don't want to be in shape
anymore.

I want to be flabby and slovenly and be
able to brush my teeth with one hand

again.

Don't worry about it, John. Chao Ling's
cousin's going to walk on your back.

You're going to feel like a new man.
Listen, I'm in such pain, I'll try

anything.

You ready?

It's my cousin.

This is your cousin?

Yeah.

You're the best. You're the best. Thanks
for your trouble.

Bye -bye.

Well, there we time.

I must have been crazy.

Okay, all right, all right. I'll be
fine. I'll be fine.

Hello, everyone.

You just missed it, Louise.

John was all hunched over in
excruciating pain. It was a terrible

That's lovely to hear, dear.

this evening, but my train from Maryland
was a bit behind schedule.

Maryland's my home state. Whereabouts
were you?

This charming little place called
Ellicott City.

Oh, I know that place.

Everybody goes there to get married.

It's wall to wall chapel.

So what were you doing there, Louise? I
wish I could tell you, but I promised

someone I wouldn't tell just yet.

Hi, everybody.

tell anyone, but how can I not tell you?
I mean, you're my best friend.

Why is it I feel tonight's not going to
be an ordinary meeting?

to each other to make you carry on like
this.

She married my husband.

You both got married to the same guy?

That's right.

It appears we're both Mrs. Jason Fowler.

Boy, are your tax returns going to be
complicated.

I think what Jason did to you two ladies
is despicable.

And how.

Ladies, I'm going to make you a promise
right here and now.

When I catch up with this Jason guy and
catch up with him, I will.

And I'm going to grab him by the throat.
I am going to put him up against the

wall. And I am not going to let him go
until I find out how he does it.

This

is

crazy. We only know the guy a week.

What the hell are you thinking?

How could either of you have married
him?

I don't know.

I've been trying to be more impulsive
lately. I guess I got really good at it.

Louise, you.

You're supposed to be the voice of
reason around here.

I know, I know. I just got swept away.
He's so passionate.

So romantic.

He even named meat after me.

You too, huh?

Beth Louise.

Kate Tartare.

Wait a minute, wait a minute. You two
are best friends.

I don't believe that you could possibly
have not told each other that you were

involved with this guy.

Well, after our second date, we were
already talking marriage, and Jason

convinced me that if I told Louise,
she'd try to talk me out of it.

Cat, is it exactly the same thing to me?

Uh, ladies, can we hurry this up a
little? I want to get home and start

on my recipe for beef bambi. Oh, come
on.

Is there a Mrs.

Fowler here?

I'm Mrs. Fowler.

Your husband is on the phone.

Thank you.

Uh, ladies.

Two? I love America.

Let me talk to him. I want to give him a
peek at my mouth.

Threaten him first. Please, let me talk
to him.

I'm the one he's not emotionally
involved with.

Yet.

Yes, so what do you want?

Uh -huh.

Uh -huh.

Uh -huh.

He's in jail.

Serves him right.

Yeah, yeah.

What are you in for?

Bigamy. No.

Lester Griffin.

Oh, my God.

This whole place is so depressing.

Yeah. To be stuck in here.

Yeah. Remind me to send in my alimony
check.

Well, hello, Jason.

In case you don't recognize him, this is
Buff Louise and Kate Tartar.

How you doing, sweethearts?

It's nice of you to come down.

I'll give you nice, you bloody bonehead.
Why did you drag me?

Wait, wait, wait.

Control yourself. Control yourself.

Now answer her.

We're in a police station. The man can
call a cop.

All right, I'm sorry.

But why did you make us think you loved
us?

Yes, why?

But I do love you. Both of you.

You are the two best things that have
ever happened to me.

I just wanted to make you happy. Is that
a crime?

In this state, it is.

Listen, I got a fingerprint in town.

If you want to post bail, you can check
at the desk, Sergeant.

I know I hurt both of you, but think of
the upside.

We'll always have Maryland.

I was for not talking to you, Kate. Oh,
Jan, what an idiot I was for not talking

to you.

This never would have happened if we'd
have trusted our friendship.

Let's make a pact.

Next time, let's talk to each other
before we marry the same guy.

Come on, let's go.

Yeah,

this may sound crazy, but I think that
guy really did love both of you.

I mean, who could blame him?

You guys are really special.

We are, aren't we? Yeah, we are.

Mrs. Jason Fowler.

Oh, there.