Original subtitles

Oh,

I don't blame you, Louise. It was...

It's horrible. There's blood all over the place. All I could do is eat my food

down while I fought for the ball.

We're driving and filming for a live studio audience.

Hi, Max. Well, hey. How are you?

Congratulations. I finally got the job of my dreams. That's fantastic.

Oh, it's got everything.

Travel, power, money. What is it?

I'm a coal collector at the Lincoln Tunnel.

I get to wear a uniform.

Now, this is called a celebration.

Wonderful, Ralphie. That's really fantastic. I love a man in uniform.

My first husband used to dress up like a nurse.

Hi, everyone.

Whoa! Look what I picked up. Is that a dog or what?

Huh? Look at him.

Yeah, he just walked up to me at lunchtime. I think he's lost.

Oh, the poor thing.

That's all right. I put an ad in the paper. It's okay. Oh, he's such a

You could fall in love with this dog in a minute. What do you think?

I'm glad you all like him. Can somebody take him for a couple of days?

Oh, I just got me part of it. Yeah, I don't have a dog, John. I'm allergic,

John. The baby and all. You understand.

I have a living cat.

Oh, come on, please.

Louise, I bet this dog is great with tears. No, Louise, I wouldn't. Fred, now

we're a pit bull.

Hey, a family of six on Spaten Island. Oh, come on, sir.

This is not a pit bull.

You never know, John.

You're very clever.

Oh, come on, somebody, please. I can't keep him.

Why not?

Well, it's going to sound silly, but I know me. I'm a sucker for dogs.

I mean, I just don't want to get attacked because... But when I was seven

old, I found this little mutt. I named him Pablo.

He just walked up to me and gave me a kiss. I just fell in love with him.

I slept with the dog. I played with him every day.

And then a week later, his owner shows up at the door, and my father makes me

give him back. It just broke my heart. I know where you're coming from, John.

Same thing happened to me. Found this little straight came up to me, started

licking my face.

Four days later, a husband showed up.

Broke my heart and my nose.

Oh, come on. All I can say is I don't want to take the chance again.

Ralph, Ralph, please. Come on, what do you say?

I'm dead. Just for a few days. No, I really am allergic, John.

Oh, come on, Ralph. What's a little thing when it comes to doing a favor for

real pal? Come on.

You know, you're right.

What's true friendship compared to a piece of... Ah, good, Ralph. Thank you.

burning, watering eyes. Ralph.

Hives up and down my... Ralph, Ralph.

Or swollen glands, flaking, itching.

Forget it, Ralph.

You sure? Don't stop.

Okay, this is your third fall this morning.

No, you're not a dog. You're a garbage disposer with hair.

Okay, I'm going to work now, so amuse yourself.

Bye now.

Don't start that again.

I had to stay in the whole weekend just because of you.

Bye. Have a nice day.

I know you don't like to stay alone here.

I don't like to stay alone here either.

But I gotta go to work. I gotta make money to put kibble on the table.

Now, no more whimpering.

That's an order.

I've had enough of this now. This is my apartment. I make the rules around here.

From now on, you're a clam.

I'm going to be a little late tonight, so don't wait up.

Don't look at me like that. It's not going to work.

Sooner or later, your owner is going to show up. Save those looks for him.

Sorry I yelled.

I've been under a lot of pressure lately.

You want to go to work with me, huh?

All right, all right. I'll probably get fired for this, but what the hell.

It's important that you're happy.

All right, let's go.

Hey, you know, we got to get a name for you.

Come on.

How about Pablo?

When I was seven years old, I had a dog named Pablo.

Yeah, he used to drool a lot, too.

Come to think of it, so did I.

You got a fix yet, Joe?

Sure.

You don't mind showering in brown water?

Joe, could you possibly close the door?

Never again will I volunteer to walk this much.

That little plan of yours didn't work, huh? All right. It's always a bad idea.

So maybe, you know, the pooch might help me meet some of the neighborhood

bimbettes.

Instead, all I met was trouble.

Why? What happened? What happened? I'll tell you what happened. What happened is

the cop gave me a $50 ticket for fouling the footpath.

Well, didn't you scoop?

When you walk a dog, you have to scoop. That's the law.

Hey, John.

I got my own laws.

All right, never mind. I'll take care of it.

Hey, Pablo.

You miss me?

Huh? You miss me?

Yeah, of course you miss me.

Hey, John, you know, uh, there's someone who didn't want to get through with

that. Looks like you got yourself a roommate.

Well, nobody's answered that ad, and it has been over three weeks.

Besides, you're not supposed to be a bad roommate, are you? You're not a bad

roommate, are you? Okay, I can see you two kids want to be alone. I got to get

out of here.

Wait, wait, wait.

You got to see this. You got to watch this. Hey, Pablo.

Give me a kiss. Come on, give me a kiss. Give me a big...

Give

him some time, John.

Maybe he just got out of a relationship.

Okay, Johnny.

No more brown water.

Really?

No water at all.

I broke something.

What? What'd you break?

I don't know. Some metal thing.

Hey, fella. Hey.

Beautiful.

I love dogs.

Is he yours?

You bet he is.

You know, the landlord doesn't allow dogs in the building.

What do you mean? I can't keep a dog?

Hey, if it was up to me, you know. But you know what it's like working for

lowlights.

Lose the dog by Tuesday.

Wait a minute, wait a minute. Joe, Joe.

Would this help?

Okay, okay. I don't know. I'm such a softy.

Get rid of him by Wednesday.

in the 1990s. I mean, why should a man feel threatened just because a woman

decides to pick up the dinner set? Well, I think it's always important to have

an understanding with the man.

I know I always do.

If I pick up the tab, we go to my place.

If Tom picks it up, it's the car.

Bye, guys.

Handsome here.

Lock up your daughters.

Oh, I had the most fantastic day of my life.

My first day working at the tunnel.

I thought it was great.

Are you all right, dear? Oh, I'm fine, I'm fine. They say it's just a matter of

getting used to the exhaust fumes.

What's that?

Lung cleaner.

Does anyone else have anything they'd like to share? John, you're being

uncharacteristically quiet, and I did something bothering you.

Well, yes, there is something I have on my mind.

Oh, well, is it sexual?

No, no, no, it's nothing like that.

Well, I saw you were at the house.

I think I'd like to hear John's problem.

No, it's no big deal. It's just that my last night was a problem.

What were you talking about? Where?

Where his owner showed up? No, my building doesn't allow dogs.

I have to take him to the shelter tomorrow.

Oh, no.

Well, I have no choice.

Well, why don't you move?

Oh, come on. You don't move just for a dog.

Well, I do if I'm standing here at three.

Oh, come on. Look, I'm not going to move.

I'm not going to move to a new apartment just for a dog. I mean, that's crazy.

Why is it such a problem for you?

I'll tell you why it's such a problem.

All right, you get a dog. You need a new apartment, right? Well, you might as

well get one with a bedroom. So, now you got a bedroom, now you got to get a

bed. Next thing you know, you got a woman sitting in the bed. Then what

You get married. Before you know it, you get a kid.

Then the apartment's too small, so you've got to get a house and a station

wagon. Then there's only one thing left to get. A divorce. That's what we're

talking about here in the first place.

John, it's obvious what's going on here. You're so afraid of getting hurt again,

you don't want to become emotionally involved with anything.

What do you call it for Pablo?

You know, Louise is right, John.

This is the first time since I've known you that you've been feeling really good

about something.

fight it. Do you want to give your dog a wager? Huh?

No. Then seize the moment.

It'll be the first positive step you've taken for a year and a half.

You know, you're right, you're right. Maybe I should move.

I don't know why I've been hiding out in that crummy little apartment. I mean,

there was only supposed to be some place to stay while I got over my divorce.

It seems like I've been living there forever, though.

You know, even if they did allow Pablo to live there, I think this guy deserves

better. Hmm.

I think I do, too.

So, uh,

tomorrow, Pablo and I are gonna go look for an apartment. Now you're talking!

You know, John, they have a saying where I work.

Life is like a tunnel.

Once you go into it, don't expect to listen to the radio.

God, what does that mean?

Pavilion.

Hey,

Pablo. You all remember Pablo, huh?

Hey, Pablo.

There he is.

So, what do you think, huh? Is this a great apartment or what? Yeah, this is

going to be really terrific when you finally get your stuff in here.

This is all my stuff.

I put Pablo's bed right under the window. He likes to lie in the sun, you

Hey, hey, guys. What's this? What's this?

Pablo?

Give me a kiss. Come on. Give me a kiss, Pablo.

Oh, Pablo.

John, don't go.

It's time to be common.

Uh, John, you're probably going to want to keep these blinds closed.

I mean, somebody can look in? No, somebody could look out. You ever see a

-year -old woman giving herself a sponge bear?

Greg! Give it to Greg!

Hey!

Rob!

Rob! How's it going, Rob?

Oh, it's great.

Did you come from work?

Nope. I'm going to get my day off.

Hey, Pablo, our first phone call.

Hello?

Yeah, this is John Lacey.

Uh, yes, I did find a dog.

No, no, no, hey, look, pal, no way is this your dog.

Three small dark brown spots in his right ear?

Well, yes, he has, what I'm sure are three common dark brown spots in his

ear.

Well, I'm... Yeah, you can come over, but I'm telling you, you're wasting your

time.

Huh?

No, don't be silly. I'm not going to call him that.

This dog would never answer to a stupid name like Buddy.

Buddy?

I knew it.

Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, why, why, why, why did I ever listen to you idiots?

Your fault. I told you this would happen. It happened when I was seven

old, and then, bam, right away, it happened again. All right, John.

It is not fair to blame this on them.

Oh, shut up, Kirk. I'm talking about all of you.

It's been so long since I've seen you really feel good about something. Go for

it. And you.

Life is a tunnel.

And you, too.

Seize the moment.

Take the first step.

I'm sorry. Well, I did. You should have listened to me.

You said we were sorry.

I'm sorry for lying.

If you don't mind, I'd like to spend the

last few moments with my best friend.

Don't you worry about a thing, Pablo.

No way that jerk will take you away from me. You're my buddy.

I have a little talk about names, you know?

Uh, yeah, coming. Okay, he's here. Now, don't make a sound.

And don't worry about anything. I'm going to take care of everything.

Uh, you, very quietly.

For once, try not to burp. Yeah, yeah, I'm coming.

Coming. I said I'm coming.

Would you keep your pants on?

Why do men always treat me that way?

Oh, I'm sorry.

Come on.

Look, John, I know you said that you wanted to be alone, but...

I thought we could use a friend to talk to now that Pablo's gone.

He's not gone, and he's not going.

What are you talking about?

I'm not going to give that jerk my dog.

John, what if Pablo is a family pet? The guy who calls could have kids.

Well, if he has kids, he doesn't need a dog.

Besides, his friend do kids like dogs?

Oh, John.

John, and how are you going to keep him from taking Pablo?

Don't you worry. I got a plan.

It's foolproof.

I've been thinking about it for the last three hours.

It's like a revelation from God. What is it? You ready?

Uh -huh. The dog ran away.

And he took your brain with him.

Look,

John, I know you. You're not going to be able to look that man in the eye and

lie to him.

Yes, you are.

All right, here comes my dog.

The dog ran away.

You ought to be ashamed of yourself, John. That man is blind. Now, you open

door and apologize.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry your dog ran away.

John!

What's going on here? Why did you slam the door in my face? What? Oh, uh...

Brother, he thought you were a cane salesman.

Look, my name is Ray Gordon. I talked to you on the phone.

I have come for my dog.

Now, look here, buddy.

Buddy!

No, no, this is my dog, Blackie. This is Blackie.

Easy, Blackie. Easy, Blackie. Nice poodle. Nice poodle, Blackie. Now,

don't bother this nice man because this nice, this nice dog...

looking for his dog.

Mr. Gordon, you found his dog. I don't know. I must be some kind of a jerk

This is your buddy.

Buddy. Mr.

Gordon, my name is Kate McHare and I have to apologize to my friend John. He

temporarily deranged.

I can understand how I feel.

Boy, have I missed this guy.

Good night, Father -in -law.

You take care of yourself, okay?

Good night, Norman.

I'll call you tomorrow, okay?

Yes.

Good night.

Yes, good night.

Had to move into a building that allows dogs.

Lifeguards on TV battle danger in the high tides Friday night. And the action

continues with the NBC Movie of the Week.

Andy Dickinson stars in Prime Target. Friday, only on NBC.

50th anniversary present for my ex -in -law.

Something that's really special. Something that says, I care.

Matching set of gold toothbrushes.

I'm not surprised they're on sale.

Gold wine goblets. Now, that sounds interesting. How much is that?

Oh, really?

Hold a set of those toothbrushes for me, would you?

You're closing? No, don't close. Please, don't close. I'll be right there.

Thank you.

John! Oh, hi, Brad. Thank God I have a friend in this world like you. Come

Brad, Brad, don't do that. Please, don't do that. Because of you, John, my

lonely days are over. Oh, no, they're not.

John, I took your advice.

I joined a support group like yours.

My first meeting tonight.

Well, good for you, Brad. John, you've got to come with me. Oh, no, no, no, I

can't. Besides, right now I've got to get a present. No, but I'm terrified

meeting new people.

Why do you think I married my cousin?

I don't want to hear about that again.

John, please, I'm desperate.

All right, okay, okay, okay. John, thanks very much. I owe you my life.

Anything. You name it, you got it. Can you give me a ride over to

right now?

Yes, sure. And lose my parking spot? Come on.