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00:00:02,002 --> 00:00:03,960
ADULT ADAM: Back in the '80s, my mom didn't go into an office
2
00:00:04,047 --> 00:00:05,831
but she did have
an important job,
3
00:00:05,918 --> 00:00:07,833
getting the Goldbergs' day
off and running,
4
00:00:07,920 --> 00:00:09,531
and it all started
with a hearty breakfast.
5
00:00:09,618 --> 00:00:11,968
Ghostbusters cereal
for my little Marshmallow Man.
6
00:00:12,055 --> 00:00:14,536
Crunchin' makes me
feel good!
7
00:00:14,623 --> 00:00:18,714
Triple protein, quadruple egg,
and quintuple cheese omelet
for my grizzly Barry.
8
00:00:18,801 --> 00:00:21,804
My body will turn
all of this into muscle
immediately. Watch.
9
00:00:21,891 --> 00:00:25,068
Erica, Raisin Bran
with a prune juice chaser.
10
00:00:25,155 --> 00:00:27,462
What's good for the heart
is also good for the bottom.
11
00:00:27,549 --> 00:00:29,333
Gah, Mom!
But also, thank you.
12
00:00:29,420 --> 00:00:30,943
Bevy,
which shirt do I like?
13
00:00:31,031 --> 00:00:32,771
ADULT ADAM:
My mom was also
our in-house stylist.
14
00:00:32,858 --> 00:00:34,512
Left hand.
And which pants
do I like?
15
00:00:34,599 --> 00:00:36,601
The ones you're wearing.
That's why I put 'em on!
16
00:00:36,688 --> 00:00:38,908
I know what looks good.
You really do.
17
00:00:38,995 --> 00:00:41,041
Now go change your socks.
They're two different colors.
18
00:00:41,128 --> 00:00:42,259
Oh, yeah.
I'll be right back.
19
00:00:42,346 --> 00:00:43,695
She was also our pharmacist.
20
00:00:43,782 --> 00:00:46,394
Blood pressure, cholesterol,
heartburn, and dewormer.
21
00:00:46,481 --> 00:00:48,831
Dewormer? What
aren't you telling me?
22
00:00:48,918 --> 00:00:50,702
Not for you, Dad,
for Lucky.
23
00:00:50,789 --> 00:00:52,835
Who's my little dumper?
24
00:00:52,922 --> 00:00:54,228
And when she sent us off,
25
00:00:54,315 --> 00:00:56,230
that's when my mom's work
really began.
26
00:00:56,317 --> 00:00:59,015
Yes, I'm calling
about my flight
to Fort Lauderdale,
27
00:00:59,102 --> 00:01:01,148
which might as well
have been to hell
28
00:01:01,235 --> 00:01:04,107
because that's what my back
and upper groin have been in
since we landed.
29
00:01:04,194 --> 00:01:06,457
What does "TWA"
stand for, anyway?
30
00:01:06,544 --> 00:01:08,503
"The Worst Airline"?
31
00:01:08,590 --> 00:01:10,809
You know what, Wayne?
Just connect me
to your supervisor.
32
00:01:10,896 --> 00:01:13,682
I'm gonna need to speak
to your supervisor, Lydia.
33
00:01:13,769 --> 00:01:16,554
You know what?
I need to talk to
your supervisor.
34
00:01:16,641 --> 00:01:17,903
Just connect me
to your supervisor.
35
00:01:17,990 --> 00:01:20,167
Well, maybe your supervisor
feels differently.
36
00:01:20,254 --> 00:01:21,559
Let me speak
to someone higher.
37
00:01:21,646 --> 00:01:23,561
Well, maybe
your supervisor
can help me.
38
00:01:23,648 --> 00:01:25,955
You know what?
I demand to speak
to your supervisor.
39
00:01:26,912 --> 00:01:28,523
Oh, you're the CEO?
40
00:01:28,610 --> 00:01:30,264
Well, then, I'm gonna need
two first-class tickets
41
00:01:30,351 --> 00:01:32,135
and a mess of
those little pretzel bags.
42
00:01:32,222 --> 00:01:34,137
After cleaning, couponing,
and complaining,
43
00:01:34,224 --> 00:01:35,834
my mom sped off
to do her favorite thing...
44
00:01:35,921 --> 00:01:37,749
Shopping and errands.
45
00:01:37,836 --> 00:01:41,144
Yep, Beverly Goldberg
was an unstoppable force!
46
00:01:41,231 --> 00:01:43,015
BEVERLY: Damn it!
47
00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:45,061
What is wrong with you?
48
00:01:45,148 --> 00:01:47,977
Nobody stops
at that stop sign!
49
00:01:48,064 --> 00:01:49,674
♪ I'm twisted up inside
50
00:01:49,761 --> 00:01:52,547
♪ But nonetheless
I feel the need to say
51
00:01:55,550 --> 00:01:57,160
♪ I don't know the future
52
00:01:57,247 --> 00:02:00,598
♪ But the past keeps getting
clearer every day ♪
53
00:02:00,685 --> 00:02:02,557
ADULT ADAM:
It was March 6th,
1980-something,
54
00:02:02,644 --> 00:02:04,820
and, after weeks
of mending a broken heart,
55
00:02:04,907 --> 00:02:07,344
my brother was finally ready
to get back to normal life.
56
00:02:07,431 --> 00:02:09,520
Buenos dias,
jota-te-pe!
57
00:02:09,607 --> 00:02:11,522
JTP: Jota-te-pe!
Are we doing Spanish now?
58
00:02:11,609 --> 00:02:14,438
Elshut up-o,
Mateo Bradley!
59
00:02:14,525 --> 00:02:15,787
Gentleman, I know
I've been distracted
60
00:02:15,874 --> 00:02:17,441
by the whole Lainey drama,
61
00:02:17,528 --> 00:02:19,226
but fear not, JTP.
62
00:02:19,313 --> 00:02:21,141
I'm once again ready
to sit upon my throne
63
00:02:21,228 --> 00:02:23,012
as your unstable leader.
64
00:02:23,099 --> 00:02:24,274
My first decree,
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00:02:24,361 --> 00:02:27,016
we shall playeth Smashball.
66
00:02:27,103 --> 00:02:29,497
Ooh, we'd love to,
but it's crunch time
for college applications.
67
00:02:29,584 --> 00:02:31,020
Oh... Right.
68
00:02:31,107 --> 00:02:32,108
College.
69
00:02:32,195 --> 00:02:33,979
We are seniors,
70
00:02:34,066 --> 00:02:35,503
so that would be happening
right around now, wouldn't it?
71
00:02:35,590 --> 00:02:37,287
Dude, don't tell us
the whole Lainey thing
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00:02:37,374 --> 00:02:39,115
distracted you
from applying to college.
73
00:02:39,202 --> 00:02:40,508
No!
74
00:02:40,595 --> 00:02:42,031
Don't be so stupid,
Matt Bradley!
75
00:02:42,118 --> 00:02:44,033
But I didn't even say...
Bup-bup-bup-bup!
76
00:02:44,120 --> 00:02:45,469
Just out of curiosity,
77
00:02:45,556 --> 00:02:48,342
tell me everything about
this application process
78
00:02:48,429 --> 00:02:50,082
so I know
you're doing it right.
79
00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:51,736
Well, we've really
been beefing up
our extra curriculars.
80
00:02:51,823 --> 00:02:53,042
Naked Rob
is an Eagle Scout.
81
00:02:53,129 --> 00:02:54,130
It's the highest level
of Boy Scout
82
00:02:54,217 --> 00:02:55,262
and the lowest level
of cop.
83
00:02:55,349 --> 00:02:56,915
Andy's a youth basketball
coach.
84
00:02:57,002 --> 00:02:58,613
Which is cool
'cause I'm taller
than all of 'em.
85
00:02:58,700 --> 00:03:00,049
And Matt Bradley's in
the Big Brother program.
86
00:03:00,136 --> 00:03:02,182
Jeremiah really
stole my heart.
87
00:03:02,269 --> 00:03:03,705
And I think also my car keys.
88
00:03:03,792 --> 00:03:05,446
And I'm the treasurer
for the Model UN.
89
00:03:05,533 --> 00:03:07,578
It's really stressful,
so all my armpit hair
fell out,
90
00:03:07,665 --> 00:03:09,276
but it'll all be worth it
if it impresses Dartmouth.
91
00:03:09,363 --> 00:03:11,452
It's good to see
we're all preparing.
92
00:03:11,539 --> 00:03:12,757
Therefore, there's
no reason to panic.
93
00:03:14,150 --> 00:03:15,586
Excuse me.
94
00:03:20,243 --> 00:03:21,288
I'm freaking out, man!
95
00:03:21,375 --> 00:03:23,159
Is that squirrel
taunting you again?
96
00:03:23,246 --> 00:03:25,030
Apparently,
I got so swept up in
97
00:03:25,117 --> 00:03:26,554
not getting married
to Lainey,
98
00:03:26,641 --> 00:03:28,338
I forgot about the whole
"getting into college" thing!
99
00:03:28,425 --> 00:03:30,427
Did you say "college"?
I heard "college."
100
00:03:30,514 --> 00:03:32,037
Don't screw this up, moron.
101
00:03:32,124 --> 00:03:33,169
Where did he come from?
102
00:03:33,256 --> 00:03:34,605
Dad, you gotta back off.
103
00:03:34,692 --> 00:03:36,128
I don't even know where
I want to go to school!
104
00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:37,391
That's where I can help.
105
00:03:37,478 --> 00:03:39,697
Okay, I need you
to focus up here,
106
00:03:39,784 --> 00:03:42,309
'cause picking a school
is not something
you just rush into.
107
00:03:42,396 --> 00:03:44,963
Done. I'm going
to Tufts.Moron!
108
00:03:45,050 --> 00:03:46,400
You don't just
open up a book
109
00:03:46,487 --> 00:03:47,531
and pick out
some random school
110
00:03:47,618 --> 00:03:48,837
and say,
"That's the one."
111
00:03:48,924 --> 00:03:50,404
But it just makes sense.
Why?
112
00:03:50,491 --> 00:03:52,754
'Cause its name is Tufts,
113
00:03:52,841 --> 00:03:55,235
and I'm basically
the toughest man
in the world.
114
00:03:55,322 --> 00:03:57,324
Tufts, fine, done.
Really?
115
00:03:57,411 --> 00:03:59,543
Hey, even if you got there
the dumbest way possible,
116
00:03:59,630 --> 00:04:01,241
Tufts is still
a great school,
so I'm good.
117
00:04:01,328 --> 00:04:03,591
So did we just decide
where I'm applying to college?
118
00:04:03,678 --> 00:04:06,071
My son's going to Tufts!
Hoo-hoo!
119
00:04:06,158 --> 00:04:08,683
ADULT ADAM: While Barry
was getting excited
about his dream college,
120
00:04:08,770 --> 00:04:11,207
my mom was just trying
to calm her nerves.
121
00:04:11,294 --> 00:04:14,036
I've been saying it
since the first time
I ran that stop sign,
122
00:04:14,123 --> 00:04:16,778
that intersection is
an accident waiting to happen,
123
00:04:16,865 --> 00:04:19,041
and it's high time
Mama fixes the problem!
124
00:04:19,128 --> 00:04:20,608
You could've been
seriously hurt!
125
00:04:20,695 --> 00:04:21,783
How?
I wasn't even there.
126
00:04:21,870 --> 00:04:24,220
But you could've been.
That's true.
127
00:04:24,307 --> 00:04:25,917
And, God forbid,
you could've gone through
the windshield
128
00:04:26,004 --> 00:04:27,571
like a delicious,
little sack of potatoes,
129
00:04:27,658 --> 00:04:29,878
and, God forbid,
a piece of glass
130
00:04:29,965 --> 00:04:31,706
could have lodged
in your brain!Oh, no!
131
00:04:31,793 --> 00:04:33,490
Thank God the shard
got lodged
132
00:04:33,577 --> 00:04:34,622
in a place
where you're fine,
133
00:04:34,709 --> 00:04:36,667
and they don't
need to operate.Thank God.
134
00:04:36,754 --> 00:04:38,582
But, God forbid,
20 years from now,
135
00:04:38,669 --> 00:04:39,801
you could sneeze,
and boom!
136
00:04:39,888 --> 00:04:41,455
The shard shifts,
and you're a veggie.
137
00:04:41,542 --> 00:04:43,065
But I sneeze all the time!
138
00:04:43,152 --> 00:04:44,632
This is a parent's
worst nightmare,
139
00:04:44,719 --> 00:04:47,330
and it's all because
of a stupid stop sign!
140
00:04:47,417 --> 00:04:50,072
What's going on?
We're making the very
gut-wrenching decision
141
00:04:50,159 --> 00:04:52,074
about whether or not
Adam should have surgery
142
00:04:52,161 --> 00:04:54,381
to remove the glass
in his brain
from a car accident.
143
00:04:54,468 --> 00:04:56,339
Oh, my God!
What do we do?
144
00:04:56,426 --> 00:04:58,472
Oh, I'm sorry.
Let me clarify.
Adam's fine.
145
00:04:58,559 --> 00:05:00,474
We need another stop sign
at the end of the block.
146
00:05:00,561 --> 00:05:01,910
What?
Are you kidding me?
147
00:05:01,997 --> 00:05:03,390
I almost gave Adam a hug.
148
00:05:03,477 --> 00:05:06,044
I know, baby.
We're all scared,
149
00:05:06,131 --> 00:05:07,742
but Mama will fix this.
150
00:05:07,829 --> 00:05:10,614
I'm gonna take this case
to City Hall.
151
00:05:10,701 --> 00:05:11,441
I don't know
if you know this,
152
00:05:11,528 --> 00:05:12,747
but I could have been
a lawyer.
153
00:05:12,834 --> 00:05:15,140
I think you've said it
once or twice before.
154
00:05:15,227 --> 00:05:16,620
I could've been a lawyer.
I could've been a lawyer.
155
00:05:16,707 --> 00:05:17,839
I could've...
...been a lawyer.
156
00:05:17,926 --> 00:05:18,883
I could've...
...been a lawyer!
157
00:05:18,970 --> 00:05:20,189
I guess that rings a bell.
It should,
158
00:05:20,276 --> 00:05:21,451
'cause that bell
rings constantly.
159
00:05:21,538 --> 00:05:23,279
Well, as the lawyer
I could've been,
160
00:05:23,366 --> 00:05:26,326
I'm going to collect evidence
to support my case.
161
00:05:26,413 --> 00:05:27,631
Adam, I need you
to make a video
162
00:05:27,718 --> 00:05:29,416
documenting
how truly dangerous
163
00:05:29,503 --> 00:05:30,721
that intersection
really is.
164
00:05:30,808 --> 00:05:32,593
Yes!
I'll get right on it!
165
00:05:32,680 --> 00:05:34,290
Uh, what's my budget
for the project?
166
00:05:34,377 --> 00:05:35,987
Schmoo, can you just film
the intersection for me?
167
00:05:36,074 --> 00:05:37,685
Challenge accepted!
I won't let you down!
168
00:05:37,772 --> 00:05:39,817
As my mom was lawyering up,
169
00:05:39,904 --> 00:05:42,994
Barry and my dad
were getting down
to the business of college.
170
00:05:43,081 --> 00:05:45,475
Okay, let's go over what
you need to get into Tufts.
171
00:05:45,562 --> 00:05:46,911
Besides just being
super tough?
172
00:05:46,998 --> 00:05:48,522
Uh-huh.
173
00:05:48,609 --> 00:05:49,914
All right,
first, your grades.
174
00:05:50,001 --> 00:05:52,700
Oh, okay, you squeaked out
a B-minus in English.
175
00:05:52,787 --> 00:05:55,616
Wow! Straight A's
in math and science.
176
00:05:55,703 --> 00:05:58,532
All that math stuff
just clicks, but English
not good much.
177
00:05:58,619 --> 00:06:00,534
Well, it looks like
I'm gonna have to help
you with your essay.
178
00:06:00,621 --> 00:06:04,015
Or...
We freestyle my essay.
Check it out.
179
00:06:04,102 --> 00:06:06,235
♪ Yo, Tufts
I got the right stuffs
180
00:06:06,322 --> 00:06:08,672
♪ Yo, Tufts
I got the right stuffs
181
00:06:08,759 --> 00:06:11,066
♪ Yo, Tufts
I got the right stuffs ♪
182
00:06:11,153 --> 00:06:12,676
You're just repeating
the same thing over and over.
183
00:06:12,763 --> 00:06:14,809
I got stuck in a rap loop.
I'm sorry!
184
00:06:14,896 --> 00:06:16,680
Okay, that does not help.
185
00:06:16,767 --> 00:06:18,769
We really gotta wow 'em
with your extra curriculars.
186
00:06:18,856 --> 00:06:21,424
All right, let me
see your resume.Boom!
187
00:06:21,511 --> 00:06:24,558
All you wrote down
was "left-handed"
and that you're an Aries?
188
00:06:24,645 --> 00:06:26,211
That's not exactly
"boom" material.
189
00:06:26,298 --> 00:06:27,430
That's all I got.
190
00:06:27,517 --> 00:06:28,736
And technically,
I'm a Pisces,
191
00:06:28,823 --> 00:06:30,520
but I don't want to be
no stupid fish.
192
00:06:30,607 --> 00:06:32,435
Damn it!
193
00:06:32,522 --> 00:06:34,263
All you had to do
was play an instrument
or volunteer somewhere,
194
00:06:34,350 --> 00:06:35,743
and you did nothing!
I know!
195
00:06:35,830 --> 00:06:37,135
I'm not Tufts enough.
196
00:06:37,222 --> 00:06:38,789
Relax, moron.
197
00:06:38,876 --> 00:06:40,530
We'll just give your resume
a little padding.
198
00:06:40,617 --> 00:06:41,662
You mean lie?
199
00:06:41,749 --> 00:06:43,751
Think of it like
your mother's shoulder pads.
200
00:06:43,838 --> 00:06:45,056
She wears them
201
00:06:45,143 --> 00:06:47,015
even though she still has
shoulders, right?
202
00:06:47,102 --> 00:06:48,582
I bet she does.
203
00:06:48,669 --> 00:06:49,496
So you're telling me
you're okay
204
00:06:49,583 --> 00:06:50,845
with shoulder padding
my resume?
205
00:06:50,932 --> 00:06:53,717
I would do anything
to get you into college.
206
00:06:53,804 --> 00:06:55,066
Come on.
I'm serious.
207
00:06:55,153 --> 00:06:56,938
This is legitimately
the most important
thing to me.
208
00:06:57,025 --> 00:07:00,202
So you're telling me
you would spend
every cent you have
209
00:07:00,289 --> 00:07:02,639
if it would mean getting
me into a good college.Yes.
210
00:07:02,726 --> 00:07:05,250
What if you had to wear
pants at all times?Yes.
211
00:07:05,337 --> 00:07:09,037
What if the Eagles
never, ever won again?Yes.
212
00:07:09,124 --> 00:07:13,389
What if the only way
was for Tom Selleck
to shave his mustache?
213
00:07:13,476 --> 00:07:14,956
Too far!
You hear me?
214
00:07:15,043 --> 00:07:17,393
You leave Selleck's
mustache out of this!
215
00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:19,656
ADULT ADAM:
While my dad and Barry
were formulating a plan,
216
00:07:19,743 --> 00:07:21,963
my mom was putting
her plan into action.
217
00:07:22,050 --> 00:07:24,313
Hello, Mr. Schnitz.
I'm not sure you remember me.
218
00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:25,445
Oh, I remember you.
219
00:07:25,532 --> 00:07:26,707
You're the lady
that comes in here
220
00:07:26,794 --> 00:07:28,578
demanding I help you
because I'm city comptroller.
221
00:07:28,665 --> 00:07:29,753
Exactly.
222
00:07:29,840 --> 00:07:32,277
And things have gotten
out of comptrol.
223
00:07:32,364 --> 00:07:35,324
Again, I think you
gravely misunderstand
224
00:07:35,411 --> 00:07:36,804
the reach
the comptroller has.
225
00:07:36,891 --> 00:07:39,023
Well, if you can't comptrol
this city, then who can?
226
00:07:39,110 --> 00:07:40,634
You realize I am just
an accountant?
227
00:07:40,721 --> 00:07:42,462
And I am holding you
accountable.
228
00:07:42,549 --> 00:07:44,072
Just tell me
what you want.
229
00:07:44,159 --> 00:07:46,204
I'd like you
to take comptrol
of a traffic situation
230
00:07:46,291 --> 00:07:49,991
heretofore known as
Goldberg v. Jenkintown.
231
00:07:50,078 --> 00:07:52,776
Ma'am, this is just an office
above a tuxedo shop,
232
00:07:52,863 --> 00:07:54,430
not a court of law
where I can make any real...
233
00:07:54,517 --> 00:07:56,693
Exhibit A.
Okay, sure.
234
00:07:56,780 --> 00:07:58,303
This is the intersection
in question.
235
00:07:58,390 --> 00:08:00,480
Note that there are
only two stop signs,
236
00:08:00,567 --> 00:08:04,135
but by the time
I rest my case,
there will be four.
237
00:08:04,222 --> 00:08:05,876
Exhibit B.
Exactly how many
exhibits are there?
238
00:08:05,963 --> 00:08:09,053
Behold, a scale model
of our neighborhood.
239
00:08:09,140 --> 00:08:10,707
And please note Exhibit C.
240
00:08:10,794 --> 00:08:12,317
These are shards
of windshield
241
00:08:12,404 --> 00:08:14,885
that almost had to be removed
from my son's brain.
242
00:08:14,972 --> 00:08:16,147
Oh, my God,
that is horrib...
243
00:08:16,234 --> 00:08:17,453
We decided not to operate
244
00:08:17,540 --> 00:08:19,716
because he wasn't
actually in the car.What?
245
00:08:19,803 --> 00:08:21,892
Don't worry, he's fine
and super talented,
246
00:08:21,979 --> 00:08:24,286
which is why I tasked him
with Exhibit D.
247
00:08:24,373 --> 00:08:25,679
All rise.
248
00:08:25,766 --> 00:08:27,463
I really don't want to.
Overruled!
249
00:08:27,550 --> 00:08:28,943
Again, this is not a court...
You know what? Fine.
250
00:08:29,030 --> 00:08:30,161
Motion to get this
over with, then.
251
00:08:30,248 --> 00:08:30,945
You may be seated.
252
00:08:32,381 --> 00:08:34,252
ADAM: The year is 2033,
253
00:08:34,339 --> 00:08:37,734
crime is at an all time high and volcanoes are everywhere!
254
00:08:37,821 --> 00:08:39,170
BEVERLY: What is this?
255
00:08:39,257 --> 00:08:40,998
We agreed you were only
gonna film the stop signs.
256
00:08:41,085 --> 00:08:43,305
Trust me. You need to hook in
the audience with a story.
257
00:08:43,392 --> 00:08:47,135
The President's plane
has crash-landed
in Jenkintown.
258
00:08:47,222 --> 00:08:49,093
That's the forbidden sector.
259
00:08:49,180 --> 00:08:51,792
Only you can help us!
260
00:08:51,879 --> 00:08:53,097
Is that right,
what I'm saying?
261
00:08:53,184 --> 00:08:56,579
Even though I only have
one eye, I'll do it.
262
00:08:56,666 --> 00:08:58,015
I'll save the President.
263
00:08:59,669 --> 00:09:02,324
It's go time.
Nothing will stop me!
264
00:09:05,327 --> 00:09:08,591
POPS: The President blew up
before Snake could get to him.
265
00:09:08,678 --> 00:09:10,637
The mission has failed.
266
00:09:10,724 --> 00:09:12,726
I'm re... I'm really
not following the story...
267
00:09:12,813 --> 00:09:13,901
ADAM: We need a stop sign.
268
00:09:13,988 --> 00:09:15,250
Okay.
269
00:09:15,337 --> 00:09:17,557
Well,
I did not understand
any of that,
270
00:09:17,644 --> 00:09:19,602
but I really would like you
not to be here,
271
00:09:19,689 --> 00:09:21,299
so I'm gonna give you
that stop sign.
272
00:09:21,386 --> 00:09:23,127
So... I won the case?
273
00:09:23,214 --> 00:09:24,694
You took comptrol
of the courtroom.
274
00:09:24,781 --> 00:09:26,304
Which is my office,
so, yeah, sure.
275
00:09:26,391 --> 00:09:28,045
Great!
276
00:09:28,132 --> 00:09:29,960
So just, uh, bang the gavel
and make it official.
277
00:09:30,047 --> 00:09:31,396
Well, I don't have a ga...
You know what?
278
00:09:31,483 --> 00:09:32,484
Let me just do
this Fanta can.
279
00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:33,921
Ah!
280
00:09:34,008 --> 00:09:35,618
We won the big case!
281
00:09:35,705 --> 00:09:37,011
Amazing!
282
00:09:37,098 --> 00:09:38,229
How did I play?
283
00:09:38,316 --> 00:09:41,058
Not great,
but Mom was on fire.
284
00:09:41,145 --> 00:09:44,366
I gotta admit,
even if the whole thing
is aggressively pointless,
285
00:09:44,453 --> 00:09:45,976
it's kind of cool
you actually
made a difference.
286
00:09:46,063 --> 00:09:47,891
You know, this is really
important to me,
287
00:09:47,978 --> 00:09:50,154
and I am damn tired
of your sass mouth!
288
00:09:50,241 --> 00:09:51,242
No sass.
289
00:09:51,329 --> 00:09:53,680
I know how hard it is
to get things done.
290
00:09:53,767 --> 00:09:55,899
I mean, I've been
working on one song
for the last three months,
291
00:09:55,986 --> 00:09:57,553
and so far,
all I've got is...
292
00:09:57,640 --> 00:09:58,772
♪ Something,
something, something
293
00:09:58,859 --> 00:10:00,382
♪ And your friend Andre ♪
294
00:10:00,469 --> 00:10:01,775
And that is not good.
295
00:10:01,862 --> 00:10:02,558
I mean,
who the hell is Andre?
296
00:10:02,645 --> 00:10:03,994
I think it's catchy.
297
00:10:04,081 --> 00:10:05,779
Point is,
I'm proud of you.
298
00:10:05,866 --> 00:10:07,432
Oh, thank you, Boopie,
and you know what?
299
00:10:07,519 --> 00:10:09,173
I've made a decision.
300
00:10:09,260 --> 00:10:12,612
I am going to realize
my potential
as a potential lawyer.
301
00:10:12,699 --> 00:10:13,743
Oh, my God,
are you serious?
302
00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:15,527
You're damn right I am!
303
00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:19,880
Beverly Goldberg's
gonna be a lawyer!
304
00:10:19,967 --> 00:10:22,796
ADULT ADAM: Once my dad found out Barry's college resume was light,
305
00:10:22,883 --> 00:10:24,711
he made it his mission
to bulk it up.
306
00:10:24,798 --> 00:10:26,582
The trick is
to take a nugget of truth,
307
00:10:26,669 --> 00:10:28,192
and you spin it a little.
308
00:10:28,279 --> 00:10:29,716
You do play
a lot of sports, right?
309
00:10:29,803 --> 00:10:31,674
Hockey,
wrestling, football.
310
00:10:31,761 --> 00:10:33,241
Moron, if you played
a bunch of sports,
311
00:10:33,328 --> 00:10:35,417
why aren't any of them
on your college resume?
312
00:10:35,504 --> 00:10:39,247
A variety of reasons,
but mostly 'cause of
unsuccessful tryouts.
313
00:10:39,334 --> 00:10:41,466
So you played all three
for a little bit,
314
00:10:41,553 --> 00:10:43,817
so you're at least
a three-letter
varsity player,
315
00:10:43,904 --> 00:10:45,775
and an MVP.
316
00:10:45,862 --> 00:10:46,907
I never won MVP.
317
00:10:46,994 --> 00:10:48,735
You never won
Most Valuable Player,
318
00:10:48,822 --> 00:10:50,867
but "MVP"
could stand for anything.
319
00:10:50,954 --> 00:10:52,652
Like Magic Velvet Pants?
320
00:10:52,739 --> 00:10:54,610
Who wins Magic Velvet Pants?
321
00:10:54,697 --> 00:10:56,003
I don't know. A genie?
322
00:10:56,090 --> 00:10:57,744
Should we put down
that I'm a genie, too?
323
00:10:57,831 --> 00:10:59,571
Let's move on.
So we covered sports.
324
00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:01,443
What about community service?
325
00:11:01,530 --> 00:11:03,271
I guess I am
in the community
326
00:11:03,358 --> 00:11:05,012
when I'm walking around
the community.
327
00:11:05,099 --> 00:11:07,492
Wow, sounds like
you're the head of
a neighborhood watch.
328
00:11:07,579 --> 00:11:10,060
And I do shout
at dogs sometimes.
329
00:11:10,147 --> 00:11:12,106
Seems to me
that you train
service animals.
330
00:11:12,193 --> 00:11:13,498
I think I'm getting
the hang of this,
331
00:11:13,585 --> 00:11:15,979
like that one time I played
checkers with Pops.
332
00:11:16,066 --> 00:11:18,460
I was basically volunteering
with sad, old veterans.
333
00:11:18,547 --> 00:11:20,636
Perfect, throw more at me!
334
00:11:20,723 --> 00:11:22,551
ADULT ADAM: And with that,
my dad spun
all of my brother's antics
335
00:11:22,638 --> 00:11:23,683
into resume gold.
336
00:11:23,770 --> 00:11:25,075
His bad BMX-ing became...
337
00:11:25,162 --> 00:11:26,860
School cycling team.
338
00:11:26,947 --> 00:11:29,123
Goofing off
in the gymnasium became...Gymnast!
339
00:11:29,210 --> 00:11:31,038
Trying to eat an apple
in one bite became...
340
00:11:31,125 --> 00:11:33,083
Head of
the Isaac Newton Society.
341
00:11:33,170 --> 00:11:34,519
Doing whatever this is
became...
342
00:11:34,606 --> 00:11:36,173
Gravity experiments
elective.
343
00:11:36,260 --> 00:11:38,567
Just walking became...
Hall monitor!
344
00:11:38,654 --> 00:11:40,700
His lifelong obsession
withDonkey Kong became...
345
00:11:40,787 --> 00:11:43,398
Unpaid assistant
to a primate physician.
346
00:11:43,485 --> 00:11:45,313
And dressing as
a pirate became...Pirate!
347
00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:48,316
Wow, I've led
an incredibly rich life.
348
00:11:48,403 --> 00:11:49,752
You're damn right you have.
349
00:11:49,839 --> 00:11:52,015
Hoo-hoo!
I'm a good dad!
350
00:11:52,102 --> 00:11:53,974
ADULT ADAM: While my dad
was feeling confident about
Barry's future,
351
00:11:54,061 --> 00:11:55,932
my mom was getting ready
to change hers.
352
00:11:56,019 --> 00:11:58,282
Good morning,
your honorable smush bottom!
353
00:11:58,369 --> 00:11:59,631
Looking good, Mom!
354
00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:01,459
That's because today
is the first day
355
00:12:01,546 --> 00:12:03,766
of your mama bear's journey
to becoming a trial lawyer.
356
00:12:03,853 --> 00:12:05,159
Well, I know
you can do it.
357
00:12:05,246 --> 00:12:06,508
I mean, who's better
at arguing than you?
358
00:12:06,595 --> 00:12:08,510
Well, I did get this suit
at half price
359
00:12:08,597 --> 00:12:10,077
because of a smudge
on the shoulder,
360
00:12:10,164 --> 00:12:12,122
which I put there
and later removed.
361
00:12:12,209 --> 00:12:13,994
And those are the kind
of questionable morals
362
00:12:14,081 --> 00:12:16,344
that will make you
an ace attorney. Thank you.
363
00:12:16,431 --> 00:12:18,607
Okay, so here's what it takes
to become a lawyer.
364
00:12:18,694 --> 00:12:20,827
First, you'll have
to get ready for the LSATs.
365
00:12:20,914 --> 00:12:22,916
Well,
I can LSAT or L-stand.
366
00:12:23,003 --> 00:12:24,787
I can do it all.
367
00:12:26,006 --> 00:12:27,181
Seriously, what is that?
368
00:12:27,268 --> 00:12:28,748
It's the
Law School Admissions Test,
369
00:12:28,835 --> 00:12:31,272
which takes about four months
to prepare for.
370
00:12:31,359 --> 00:12:33,840
And after that,
you apply to law school,
which is three years.
371
00:12:33,927 --> 00:12:36,059
Even for a proven
legal eagle like me?
372
00:12:36,146 --> 00:12:37,495
I mean, I could've been
a lawyer.
373
00:12:37,582 --> 00:12:38,627
That's got to count
for something.
374
00:12:38,714 --> 00:12:40,716
It doesn't. Moving on.
375
00:12:40,803 --> 00:12:42,849
So after you graduate,
you'll have to pass the bar.
376
00:12:42,936 --> 00:12:45,503
Another test?
I just took the "L" one.
377
00:12:45,590 --> 00:12:47,679
And then you'll get hired
at a firm and be an associate
378
00:12:47,767 --> 00:12:49,159
and work your way
up the ladder until...
379
00:12:49,246 --> 00:12:51,205
Eh, Mama's out.
What?
380
00:12:51,292 --> 00:12:53,773
I-I think I'm okay
just knowing I could
have been a lawyer.
381
00:12:53,860 --> 00:12:54,948
How can you possibly
know that
382
00:12:55,035 --> 00:12:56,776
if you gave up
after two minutes?
383
00:12:56,863 --> 00:12:57,864
Well,
when you think about it,
384
00:12:57,951 --> 00:12:59,648
I already
kind of am a lawyer.
385
00:12:59,735 --> 00:13:01,258
Except
you're not a lawyer,
386
00:13:01,345 --> 00:13:02,651
because you did nothing
to become one.
387
00:13:02,738 --> 00:13:04,958
According to the show
L.A. Law,
388
00:13:05,045 --> 00:13:07,612
anyone can represent
themselves in court,
389
00:13:07,699 --> 00:13:09,266
so that kind of
makes me a lawyer.
390
00:13:09,353 --> 00:13:12,182
No, it makes you a person
who wants to be a lawyer
but isn't one.
391
00:13:12,269 --> 00:13:14,054
If I can defend myself
in court,
392
00:13:14,141 --> 00:13:17,187
then you can,
Daddy can, anyone can.
393
00:13:17,274 --> 00:13:18,972
So when you think about it,
394
00:13:19,059 --> 00:13:20,843
doesn't that make us
all lawyers?
395
00:13:20,930 --> 00:13:23,019
That is an
incredibly dumb way
to think about it.
396
00:13:23,106 --> 00:13:24,368
Hey, I could've been
a lawyer,
397
00:13:24,455 --> 00:13:26,414
so you show me the respect
I could've deserved.
398
00:13:28,546 --> 00:13:29,939
Read it and weep,
suckers.
399
00:13:30,026 --> 00:13:31,375
What's this?
Oh.
400
00:13:31,462 --> 00:13:33,769
Just the best college resume
ever assembled.
401
00:13:33,856 --> 00:13:36,424
Three-letter varsity athlete?
Captain of the diving team?
402
00:13:36,511 --> 00:13:37,686
Geology club?
403
00:13:37,773 --> 00:13:39,383
Dude, you didn't do
any of these things.
404
00:13:39,470 --> 00:13:41,168
It says you're the treasurer
of the Model UN?
405
00:13:41,255 --> 00:13:43,823
I once gave the foreign kid
who smells like beets
406
00:13:43,910 --> 00:13:45,346
a quarter to buy a donut,
407
00:13:45,433 --> 00:13:46,651
so that pretty much
makes me
408
00:13:46,738 --> 00:13:48,392
official treasurer
of the Model UN.
409
00:13:48,479 --> 00:13:49,916
Except you're not
'cause I am!
410
00:13:50,003 --> 00:13:52,135
In the name of Luxembourg,
I declare war on your lies!
411
00:13:52,222 --> 00:13:54,268
We don't have a real army,
so it's more of
a symbolic gesture.
412
00:13:54,355 --> 00:13:56,052
Guys, relax.
413
00:13:56,139 --> 00:13:58,054
It's not like
I'm hurting anyone.Yes, you are!
414
00:13:58,141 --> 00:14:00,187
What if your lies get you
into a school over one of us?
415
00:14:00,274 --> 00:14:01,623
Is that fair?
Okay.
416
00:14:01,710 --> 00:14:04,452
You're clearly feeling
a lot of emotions right now,
417
00:14:04,539 --> 00:14:06,846
which I can help you with
'cause I'm a peer counselor
418
00:14:06,933 --> 00:14:08,412
and a certified
youth minister.
419
00:14:08,499 --> 00:14:10,066
This is super not cool
or chill, man.
420
00:14:10,153 --> 00:14:11,720
Oh, come on,
Matt Bradley!
421
00:14:11,807 --> 00:14:13,287
Where did that come from?
422
00:14:13,374 --> 00:14:14,636
Come on, guys!
423
00:14:14,723 --> 00:14:16,159
JTP...
JTP!
424
00:14:16,246 --> 00:14:17,682
J...
425
00:14:17,769 --> 00:14:19,380
...TP.
426
00:14:19,467 --> 00:14:20,860
ADULT ADAM: While Barry
was feeling guilty
427
00:14:20,947 --> 00:14:22,470
about achieving
his college dreams,
428
00:14:22,557 --> 00:14:25,168
Erica was hell-bent on getting my mom to reach for hers.
429
00:14:25,255 --> 00:14:27,388
There she is,
ready to fold
my intimates.
430
00:14:27,475 --> 00:14:29,129
Put down the basket.
We need to talk.
431
00:14:29,216 --> 00:14:31,522
Erica, it's fine.
I don't need to be
a real lawyer.
432
00:14:31,609 --> 00:14:33,481
Okay, forget law,
433
00:14:33,568 --> 00:14:35,439
but there's
so many other things
that you're good at,
434
00:14:35,526 --> 00:14:37,354
so let's pick one of those
and make it your thing.
435
00:14:37,441 --> 00:14:38,660
Okay, like what?
436
00:14:38,747 --> 00:14:41,141
I'm glad you asked,
because I made this...
437
00:14:41,228 --> 00:14:42,925
A list of
potential dream jobs
438
00:14:43,012 --> 00:14:44,405
tailored
to your very talents.
439
00:14:44,492 --> 00:14:46,233
For instance, diplomat.
440
00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:48,583
Well, I do have a way
of helping people
441
00:14:48,670 --> 00:14:51,151
to get what I want them
to think they want.Exactly.
442
00:14:51,238 --> 00:14:53,980
And that's just one
of many exciting options.
443
00:14:54,067 --> 00:14:55,285
What about
fashion designer?
444
00:14:55,372 --> 00:14:57,635
Mmm, my clothes
are purely for fun.
445
00:14:57,722 --> 00:14:59,550
I don't want to take
the joy out of it.
446
00:14:59,637 --> 00:15:02,118
Or you could be
a gastroenterologist.
447
00:15:02,205 --> 00:15:05,078
Speaking of which,
how did that fiber-rich
breakfast work out, hmm?
448
00:15:05,165 --> 00:15:07,558
Gah, I have so many futures
for you on this board.
449
00:15:07,645 --> 00:15:09,386
Just pick one and do it!
450
00:15:09,473 --> 00:15:11,998
Enough.
I'm fine just doing
what I do, okay?
451
00:15:12,085 --> 00:15:13,608
I don't need
some fancy job.
452
00:15:13,695 --> 00:15:14,914
Yes, you do!
453
00:15:15,001 --> 00:15:16,480
Because if you give up
on being a lawyer,
454
00:15:16,567 --> 00:15:18,700
which is actually doable,
455
00:15:18,787 --> 00:15:21,094
then what does that
mean for me making it
as a musician?
456
00:15:21,181 --> 00:15:22,922
Erica, me saying
"I could've been a lawyer"
457
00:15:23,009 --> 00:15:24,140
has nothing to do with you.
458
00:15:24,227 --> 00:15:25,881
Of course it does!
459
00:15:25,968 --> 00:15:27,970
I dropped out of college
just like you,
460
00:15:28,057 --> 00:15:29,493
which means
I'll just end up being a mom
461
00:15:29,580 --> 00:15:31,147
who constantly tells
her ungrateful kids
462
00:15:31,234 --> 00:15:32,757
that "I could've been
a rock star."
463
00:15:32,844 --> 00:15:34,759
I don't know whether to be
offended or worried,
464
00:15:34,846 --> 00:15:36,065
but I don't like
either feeling.
465
00:15:36,152 --> 00:15:37,458
But it's true.
466
00:15:37,545 --> 00:15:39,416
Becoming a lawyer is hard,
467
00:15:39,503 --> 00:15:42,506
and you gave up on it,
like, shockingly fast.
468
00:15:42,593 --> 00:15:44,508
And the truth is...
469
00:15:44,595 --> 00:15:46,510
I'm doing the same thing
with my music.
470
00:15:46,597 --> 00:15:48,382
Ever since Lainey left...
471
00:15:48,469 --> 00:15:50,253
I haven't
sung a single note
472
00:15:50,340 --> 00:15:51,689
or written any music
473
00:15:51,776 --> 00:15:53,604
or even touched my keyboard.
474
00:15:53,691 --> 00:15:55,563
Schmoo, you've got it
all wrong.
475
00:15:55,650 --> 00:15:58,261
I gave up on being a lawyer
'cause that was never
really my dream.
476
00:15:58,348 --> 00:15:59,828
Then why do you
always say it?
477
00:15:59,915 --> 00:16:02,222
'Cause it sounds better
than my real dream,
478
00:16:02,309 --> 00:16:04,093
which is being a mama.
479
00:16:04,180 --> 00:16:06,313
I'm living my dream.
480
00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:08,924
If music is yours,
you can't just give up on it.
481
00:16:10,621 --> 00:16:12,188
I already have.
482
00:16:15,322 --> 00:16:17,367
ADULT ADAM: After my brother
talked to the JTP,
483
00:16:17,454 --> 00:16:19,543
he was starting to have some
doubts about his resume.
484
00:16:19,630 --> 00:16:21,937
Unfortunately,
my dad had none.
485
00:16:22,024 --> 00:16:24,853
Dad, I just finished
my college essay,
486
00:16:24,940 --> 00:16:26,420
and I think we should
have a little talk.
487
00:16:26,507 --> 00:16:29,292
Oh, you should have a talk,
but not with me.Huh?
488
00:16:29,379 --> 00:16:30,467
I've got an alumnus
from Tufts here,
489
00:16:30,554 --> 00:16:31,816
and he's gonna
interview you.
490
00:16:31,903 --> 00:16:33,383
Remember my pal
Formica Mike?
491
00:16:33,470 --> 00:16:34,863
Your furniture nemesis?
492
00:16:34,950 --> 00:16:37,257
I got his mom a great deal
on a water bed,
493
00:16:37,344 --> 00:16:38,780
so he owes me.
But...
494
00:16:38,867 --> 00:16:41,174
The JTP got me thinking,
495
00:16:41,261 --> 00:16:43,263
maybe shoulder-padding
my resume...
496
00:16:43,350 --> 00:16:44,742
...isn't the most
honest thing.
497
00:16:44,829 --> 00:16:46,614
I don't care
what the PYT thinks.
498
00:16:46,701 --> 00:16:48,746
You go in there and lie
and make your dad proud.
Come on.
499
00:16:48,833 --> 00:16:50,357
Here he is...
500
00:16:50,444 --> 00:16:53,055
The future of Tufts!
501
00:16:53,142 --> 00:16:55,840
Murray, you may be right,
if this resume
is to be believed.
502
00:16:55,927 --> 00:16:58,191
And it is!
I'm gonna get you guys
some cookies.
503
00:16:58,278 --> 00:16:59,844
Hydrox, if you got 'em!
504
00:16:59,931 --> 00:17:02,325
Hydrox is the Oreo
of our people.
505
00:17:02,412 --> 00:17:04,675
Uh-huh.
Listen, about my resume...
506
00:17:04,762 --> 00:17:06,199
Oh, your resume, my gosh.
507
00:17:06,286 --> 00:17:08,070
This is something special.
508
00:17:08,157 --> 00:17:09,811
How does one person
find the time?
509
00:17:09,898 --> 00:17:13,162
"How does one person
do all that stuff
in one year," you ask?
510
00:17:13,249 --> 00:17:15,686
Well... Don't.
Don't ask.
511
00:17:15,773 --> 00:17:17,036
Okay.
512
00:17:17,123 --> 00:17:19,038
Wow, there's so much here.
513
00:17:19,125 --> 00:17:21,997
Uh, you're an
"unpaid assistant
to a primate physician."
514
00:17:22,084 --> 00:17:23,303
W... Well, I love monkeys,
515
00:17:23,390 --> 00:17:24,782
so what's it like
to work with them?
516
00:17:24,869 --> 00:17:25,653
It's good.
517
00:17:28,917 --> 00:17:30,310
Care to elaborate?
518
00:17:30,397 --> 00:17:33,182
Uh, they love
throwing barrels and stuff.
519
00:17:33,269 --> 00:17:34,879
Barrels?
Yeah, it's annoying,
520
00:17:34,966 --> 00:17:36,533
'cause you just got to save
your girlfriend
521
00:17:36,620 --> 00:17:38,361
and then jump over
rolling barrels,
522
00:17:38,448 --> 00:17:40,189
but luckily,
they break apart
523
00:17:40,276 --> 00:17:42,800
when you whack 'em
with a mallet.
524
00:17:42,887 --> 00:17:44,585
We're talking
about Donkey Kong,
aren't we?
525
00:17:44,672 --> 00:17:46,326
Yes! I'm sorry.
526
00:17:46,413 --> 00:17:48,067
It's a lie, all of it!
527
00:17:48,154 --> 00:17:50,025
I-I don't deserve
to be in Tufts.
528
00:17:50,112 --> 00:17:51,940
He doesn't mean it.
He's just being a moron.
529
00:17:52,027 --> 00:17:54,725
I do mean it.
So no Hydrox?
530
00:17:54,812 --> 00:17:56,510
Look, I'm sorry I messed up
my whole senior year
531
00:17:56,597 --> 00:17:58,381
and focused on
the wrong things,
532
00:17:58,468 --> 00:18:00,209
but I won't lie my way
into college.
533
00:18:00,296 --> 00:18:01,689
I was promised Hydrox.
534
00:18:01,776 --> 00:18:04,170
That's why I wanted you
to read my essay.
535
00:18:04,257 --> 00:18:06,824
It's not pretty,
but it's real.
536
00:18:06,911 --> 00:18:08,435
It's about what really
happened this year, and...
537
00:18:10,045 --> 00:18:11,438
If the truth isn't
good enough for Tufts,
538
00:18:11,525 --> 00:18:14,093
then I'll just
have to live with it.
539
00:18:20,751 --> 00:18:22,536
Whoa, what's all this?
540
00:18:22,623 --> 00:18:25,278
I figured it was time
to pursue a new dream.
541
00:18:25,365 --> 00:18:26,714
I thought you said
being a mom was your dream.
542
00:18:26,801 --> 00:18:28,933
And it is.
543
00:18:29,020 --> 00:18:30,457
But you were right.
544
00:18:30,544 --> 00:18:32,676
What kind of example
would I be setting
545
00:18:32,763 --> 00:18:34,939
if I just gave up
on all my other dreams?
546
00:18:35,026 --> 00:18:36,550
These are just recipes.
547
00:18:36,637 --> 00:18:38,247
I've decided
to write a cookbook.
548
00:18:38,334 --> 00:18:40,989
Oh, my God, yes!
549
00:18:41,076 --> 00:18:44,210
I pitched you diplomat
and not cookbook?
What is wrong with me?
550
00:18:44,297 --> 00:18:47,126
Nothing!
You still got me here!
551
00:18:47,213 --> 00:18:48,518
So, thank you, Boopie.
552
00:18:48,605 --> 00:18:50,346
No need to thank me.
553
00:18:50,433 --> 00:18:52,131
It's just good to know your
dreams don't end with me.
554
00:18:52,218 --> 00:18:53,349
And even better?
555
00:18:53,436 --> 00:18:55,308
Your dreams
are just starting,
556
00:18:55,395 --> 00:18:57,832
and there's no way
I'm gonna let you give up
before you even begin.
557
00:19:00,182 --> 00:19:01,966
I just picked
an impossible dream,
you know?
558
00:19:02,053 --> 00:19:03,925
Schmoopie...
559
00:19:04,012 --> 00:19:06,188
All dreams seem impossible.
560
00:19:06,275 --> 00:19:07,755
You've just got to
put in the work.
561
00:19:07,842 --> 00:19:09,017
ADULT ADAM:
Seeing that our mom
562
00:19:09,104 --> 00:19:11,019
wasn't afraid
to follow her dreams
563
00:19:11,106 --> 00:19:13,369
made Erica realize
that her own dreams
weren't so scary.
564
00:19:13,456 --> 00:19:16,416
And with that,
my sister was able
to find her voice again.
565
00:19:16,503 --> 00:19:19,462
♪ Clock strikes
upon the hour
566
00:19:19,549 --> 00:19:22,465
♪ And the sun
begins to fade
567
00:19:24,685 --> 00:19:27,731
♪ Still enough time
to figure out
568
00:19:27,818 --> 00:19:31,170
♪ How to chase
my blues away
569
00:19:32,606 --> 00:19:36,175
♪ I've done all right
up 'til now
570
00:19:36,262 --> 00:19:37,915
♪ It's the light of day
571
00:19:38,002 --> 00:19:40,614
♪ That shows me how
572
00:19:40,701 --> 00:19:43,356
♪ When the night falls
573
00:19:43,443 --> 00:19:45,488
♪ Loneliness calls
MURRAY: Hey.
574
00:19:46,446 --> 00:19:48,665
I, um, read your essay.
575
00:19:48,752 --> 00:19:51,146
Let me guess.
I'm a moron
for telling the truth.
576
00:19:51,233 --> 00:19:53,235
You really are,
but I loved it anyway.
577
00:19:53,322 --> 00:19:55,455
Seriously?
Yeah. It moved me.
578
00:19:56,151 --> 00:19:57,805
Why?
579
00:19:57,892 --> 00:19:59,981
All I did was talk about
getting my heart shattered
580
00:20:00,068 --> 00:20:01,548
and how this year
was a total waste.
581
00:20:01,635 --> 00:20:04,507
Barry, what you wrote
was honest and real,
582
00:20:04,594 --> 00:20:06,770
and it shows how much
you've grown,
583
00:20:06,857 --> 00:20:08,816
and that's more important
than anything
584
00:20:08,903 --> 00:20:11,297
you can put on some stupid
college resume.
585
00:20:11,384 --> 00:20:13,299
Important enough
to get me into Tufts?
586
00:20:13,386 --> 00:20:16,171
You know, I think it's time
we stop worrying
about all that stuff.
587
00:20:16,258 --> 00:20:19,392
But I know college
is the only thing
you care about.
588
00:20:19,479 --> 00:20:23,309
You know, there's one thing
I care about more... You.
589
00:20:23,396 --> 00:20:25,136
ADULT ADAM: And that day,
Barry figured out that
590
00:20:25,224 --> 00:20:26,877
as long as
you're true to yourself,
591
00:20:26,964 --> 00:20:28,444
you'll be successful
anywhere you go.
592
00:20:28,531 --> 00:20:30,403
Buckle up, baby.
593
00:20:30,490 --> 00:20:32,231
God knows what kind
of drivers are out today.
594
00:20:32,318 --> 00:20:34,450
Good news is you got us
that new stop sign.
595
00:20:34,537 --> 00:20:35,886
Wasn't easy, you know.
596
00:20:35,973 --> 00:20:38,454
Well, for you, it was.
You could've been a lawyer.
597
00:20:38,541 --> 00:20:43,546
♪ Oh, I wanna dance
with somebody
598
00:20:43,633 --> 00:20:47,289
♪ I wanna feel the heat
with somebody
599
00:20:47,376 --> 00:20:50,249
♪ Yeah, I wanna dance
with somebody
600
00:20:52,512 --> 00:20:55,776
♪ With somebody who loves me ♪
601
00:21:02,217 --> 00:21:06,047
Boom! Got it.
Add master of all cubes
to my college resume.
602
00:21:06,134 --> 00:21:07,396
I never thought
I'd say these words,
603
00:21:07,483 --> 00:21:09,355
but I'm
incredibly impressed.
604
00:21:09,442 --> 00:21:11,574
Dude, it's easy.
I just bought
a bunch of other cubes
605
00:21:11,661 --> 00:21:13,054
and peeled off
the stickers.
606
00:21:13,141 --> 00:21:15,491
Oh, so you cheated.
Of course I did!
607
00:21:15,578 --> 00:21:17,450
You suck, Mr. Rubik!
608
00:21:17,537 --> 00:21:20,061
I cannot wait 'til everyone
forgets about you
and your stupid toy.
609
00:21:20,148 --> 00:21:22,585
Mark my words,
that toy
is more than a fad.
610
00:21:22,672 --> 00:21:24,935
Rubik and his cube
will be here forever.
611
00:21:25,022 --> 00:21:26,502
I get the appeal now.
46979
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