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Adult adam:
Halloween in the '80s,
2
00:00:01,769 --> 00:00:03,836
The one day a year you could wear what you want,
3
00:00:03,838 --> 00:00:05,671
Go where you want, eat what you want,
4
00:00:05,673 --> 00:00:09,775
And nothing could stop me in my voltron costume.
5
00:00:10,243 --> 00:00:12,211
Except my "smother."
6
00:00:12,213 --> 00:00:14,213
Oh! Come on.
That's my Halloween candy.
7
00:00:14,215 --> 00:00:15,647
Let me just
eat it already.
8
00:00:15,649 --> 00:00:17,850
Not until we take it
to the hospital
9
00:00:17,852 --> 00:00:18,984
And have it x-rayed.
10
00:00:18,986 --> 00:00:23,756
Ellen shorstein's son found
a handful of aquarium gravel
11
00:00:23,758 --> 00:00:25,791
In an almond cluster.
12
00:00:25,793 --> 00:00:27,059
Tore his braces
right off.
13
00:00:27,061 --> 00:00:29,795
Adult adam:
That was one of the many urban legends back then.
14
00:00:29,797 --> 00:00:31,463
There was no google or wikipedia,
15
00:00:31,465 --> 00:00:34,600
So you believed every stupid rumor you heard,
16
00:00:34,602 --> 00:00:36,502
Like bigfoot lived in upstate new york
17
00:00:36,504 --> 00:00:39,271
Or mr. Rogers was the world's most deadly sniper
18
00:00:39,273 --> 00:00:44,009
Or there was a ghost in three men and a baby.
19
00:00:44,011 --> 00:00:45,411
We actually believed if you played
20
00:00:45,413 --> 00:00:47,846
Led zeppelin, beatles, or the stones backwards,
21
00:00:47,848 --> 00:00:50,983
You could hear hidden satanic messages.
22
00:00:50,985 --> 00:00:53,052
(garbled speech)
23
00:00:53,054 --> 00:00:55,521
Did you hear that?
He said he loves satan!
24
00:00:55,523 --> 00:00:57,923
You know what I love?
Silence!
25
00:00:57,925 --> 00:00:59,458
Stop screwing
with my record player!
26
00:00:59,460 --> 00:01:01,860
Adult adam:
But the most epic urban legend of them all
27
00:01:01,862 --> 00:01:04,463
Was that cola became a lethal poison
28
00:01:04,465 --> 00:01:08,200
When mixed with a particular exploding candy.
29
00:01:08,202 --> 00:01:09,435
Oh!
Aah!
30
00:01:09,437 --> 00:01:10,769
Stupid barry! Why?
31
00:01:10,771 --> 00:01:11,370
Oh, my god.
32
00:01:11,372 --> 00:01:13,672
You were seconds from death,
and I saved you!
33
00:01:13,674 --> 00:01:15,374
What are you talking about?
34
00:01:15,376 --> 00:01:16,508
Hello!
35
00:01:16,510 --> 00:01:17,876
When the bubbles
in the soda
36
00:01:17,878 --> 00:01:19,311
Mix with the explosives
in the pop rocks,
37
00:01:19,313 --> 00:01:22,481
It triggers a chain reaction
that melts your insides!
38
00:01:22,483 --> 00:01:23,315
Shut up.
It does not.
39
00:01:23,317 --> 00:01:25,918
Well, tell that
to mikey.
Who's mikey?
40
00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:27,219
Both: Who's mikey?
41
00:01:27,221 --> 00:01:28,620
Barry:
God, you know nothing.
42
00:01:28,622 --> 00:01:31,890
Mikey, the spokesboy
for life cereal.
43
00:01:31,892 --> 00:01:35,227
You know, he likes it.
Mikey likes it.
44
00:01:35,229 --> 00:01:38,197
Well, he did until
he mixed pop rocks and soda,
45
00:01:38,199 --> 00:01:39,431
Then he exploded.
46
00:01:39,433 --> 00:01:41,033
Oh, please.
He did not.
Wait!
47
00:01:41,035 --> 00:01:43,268
I just
saved your life.
What?
48
00:01:43,270 --> 00:01:44,736
According to the way
of the samurai,
49
00:01:44,738 --> 00:01:47,372
You're my servant
until the debt is repaid.
50
00:01:47,374 --> 00:01:48,073
That's not a thing.
51
00:01:48,075 --> 00:01:50,175
Oh, it is.
It's the bushido code.
52
00:01:50,177 --> 00:01:51,977
Well, that sounds like
complete bull-shido.
53
00:01:51,979 --> 00:01:54,246
It's ancient history
written in stone!
54
00:01:54,248 --> 00:01:55,614
You have no choice!
55
00:01:55,616 --> 00:01:59,451
I'm not anyone's slave.
You didn't save my life.
56
00:01:59,453 --> 00:02:00,819
And it's not real.
57
00:02:00,821 --> 00:02:01,620
All right, then.
58
00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:05,858
If you're so certain
it's not real, then do it.
59
00:02:05,860 --> 00:02:07,493
Do it!
60
00:02:08,161 --> 00:02:10,162
Aah!
What the hell?
61
00:02:10,164 --> 00:02:10,963
What are you,
nuts?
62
00:02:10,965 --> 00:02:15,968
Mikey gave his life
so that that would
never happen again!
63
00:02:16,169 --> 00:02:17,269
Ugh!
64
00:02:17,271 --> 00:02:18,437
¶ I'm twisted up inside
65
00:02:18,439 --> 00:02:22,875
¶ but nonetheless I feel the need to say
66
00:02:24,611 --> 00:02:25,711
¶ I don't know the future
67
00:02:25,713 --> 00:02:29,414
¶ but the past keeps getting clearer every day ¶
68
00:02:29,416 --> 00:02:32,718
Adult adam:
It was October 31, 1980-something,
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00:02:32,720 --> 00:02:35,387
The year my grandfather, a.K.A. Burt reynolds,
70
00:02:35,389 --> 00:02:37,322
Threw the most epic Halloween bash
71
00:02:37,324 --> 00:02:39,024
His condo building had ever seen.
72
00:02:39,026 --> 00:02:42,394
All right, let's get
this party started!
73
00:02:42,396 --> 00:02:45,998
Who wants
flaming pumpkin shots?
74
00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:47,299
(cheering)
75
00:02:47,301 --> 00:02:50,969
Ah!
Trick or treat, baby.
76
00:02:50,971 --> 00:02:53,605
Adult adam:
Sure, pops almost burned the place down,
77
00:02:53,607 --> 00:02:55,908
But he only cared about one thing.
78
00:02:55,910 --> 00:02:57,643
Fun party.
79
00:02:58,011 --> 00:02:59,344
Okay.
80
00:02:59,346 --> 00:03:01,213
I smoothed everything over.
81
00:03:01,215 --> 00:03:01,780
So I can stay?
82
00:03:01,782 --> 00:03:04,616
Oh, god, no. Your landlord's
kicking you out.
83
00:03:04,618 --> 00:03:06,318
But you're not going to jail.
84
00:03:06,320 --> 00:03:08,187
Don't worry.
You can move in with us.
85
00:03:08,189 --> 00:03:10,522
Roomies!
We can finally be roomies!
86
00:03:10,524 --> 00:03:12,524
Kiddo, I don't want
to cramp your style.
87
00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:14,493
What if you bring a girl
back to the room?
88
00:03:14,495 --> 00:03:16,662
We both know
that's not gonna happen.
89
00:03:16,664 --> 00:03:17,930
Let's go get
a bag packed.
90
00:03:17,932 --> 00:03:18,797
Beverly: Finally!
91
00:03:18,799 --> 00:03:22,568
All my boys under one roof!
It's happening!
92
00:03:22,570 --> 00:03:24,603
No. I know
that look in your eye.
93
00:03:24,605 --> 00:03:27,940
You want your dad
to live with us forever.
94
00:03:27,942 --> 00:03:29,875
Murray, that's a great idea!
95
00:03:29,877 --> 00:03:31,376
Stop making me feel good!
96
00:03:31,378 --> 00:03:32,077
He's not staying!
97
00:03:32,079 --> 00:03:35,547
Bevy, it's time we discussed
other options.
98
00:03:35,549 --> 00:03:36,348
Stop it right there.
99
00:03:36,350 --> 00:03:37,916
I have said this
a thousand times.
100
00:03:37,918 --> 00:03:40,452
We're not moving my dad
into a home.
101
00:03:40,454 --> 00:03:42,421
Shady willows
is not a home.
102
00:03:42,423 --> 00:03:46,625
It's a leisure community
for active seniors.
103
00:03:46,627 --> 00:03:48,594
I don't trust shady willows.
104
00:03:48,596 --> 00:03:50,329
"shady" is in the name.
105
00:03:50,331 --> 00:03:52,164
That's because
old people love shade.
106
00:03:52,166 --> 00:03:54,266
They have trees.
They have umbrellas.
107
00:03:54,268 --> 00:03:55,500
You name it, they got it.
108
00:03:55,502 --> 00:03:58,237
Taco tuesdays, fajita fridays!
109
00:03:58,239 --> 00:03:58,971
It's all there!
110
00:03:58,973 --> 00:04:00,706
That is way too much
mexican food for him.
111
00:04:00,708 --> 00:04:03,242
You're not to mention this
to him. Do you understand?
112
00:04:03,244 --> 00:04:06,445
Family takes care of family.
End of story.
113
00:04:06,447 --> 00:04:07,279
Damn it!
114
00:04:07,281 --> 00:04:07,980
I'm working my ass off
115
00:04:07,982 --> 00:04:10,582
Trying to get people
to move out of our house.
116
00:04:10,584 --> 00:04:12,451
Stop trying to move people in!
117
00:04:12,453 --> 00:04:13,819
Let's compromise, okay?
118
00:04:13,821 --> 00:04:15,854
Until we figure something out,
119
00:04:15,856 --> 00:04:16,822
Dad can crash in the attic.
120
00:04:16,824 --> 00:04:20,359
Ha ha! Good luck
getting him to move up there.
121
00:04:20,361 --> 00:04:21,927
It's hot, it's dusty,
122
00:04:21,929 --> 00:04:24,529
And it's covered
with bat doody.
123
00:04:24,631 --> 00:04:25,964
Son of a bitch.
124
00:04:25,966 --> 00:04:27,399
You got that right.
125
00:04:27,401 --> 00:04:29,468
How'd you pull this off
in two days?
126
00:04:29,470 --> 00:04:30,435
Beverly:
Oh, it was nothing.
127
00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:33,105
I just dusted,
moved some boxes, drywalled,
128
00:04:33,107 --> 00:04:35,907
Did a little electrical work,
added a bay window.
129
00:04:35,909 --> 00:04:36,808
You know,
mother's touch.
130
00:04:36,810 --> 00:04:39,244
Adult adam:
As my mom was busy moving in pops,
131
00:04:39,246 --> 00:04:43,548
Barry was moving in on lainey in the hopes to get busy.
132
00:04:43,550 --> 00:04:47,419
88, 89, 100.
133
00:04:47,421 --> 00:04:50,322
Man, exercise
does this body good.
134
00:04:50,324 --> 00:04:52,557
Time for a cool-down.
135
00:04:52,925 --> 00:04:54,459
What are you drinking?
136
00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:54,893
Pepto.
137
00:04:54,895 --> 00:04:56,728
Set the abba-zaba record
at lunch today.
138
00:04:56,730 --> 00:04:59,965
My boys bet me 10 bucks
I couldn't eat 8.
139
00:04:59,967 --> 00:05:00,732
Took down 12.
140
00:05:00,734 --> 00:05:04,403
Are you trying to impress me
by eating Halloween candy?
141
00:05:04,405 --> 00:05:07,039
Not trying.
If it happens, so be it.
142
00:05:07,041 --> 00:05:08,507
Goodbye.
143
00:05:08,509 --> 00:05:09,441
(door opens)
144
00:05:09,443 --> 00:05:11,009
Later, lainey!
(door closes)
145
00:05:11,011 --> 00:05:13,045
Wow. You are the worst.
146
00:05:13,047 --> 00:05:14,513
That's not
what lainey thinks.
147
00:05:14,515 --> 00:05:16,581
She kissed me,
remember?
148
00:05:16,583 --> 00:05:19,718
And now there's so much
electricity between us,
149
00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:22,287
All hot and crackling.
150
00:05:22,289 --> 00:05:24,122
Kind of like pop rocks.
151
00:05:24,124 --> 00:05:24,823
Speaking of which,
152
00:05:24,825 --> 00:05:26,925
Remember how
I saved your life?
No.
153
00:05:26,927 --> 00:05:29,728
According to the bushido code,
you must repay me.
154
00:05:29,730 --> 00:05:33,198
Last night,
I figured out what I want.
155
00:05:33,200 --> 00:05:34,399
Get me the girl.
156
00:05:34,401 --> 00:05:35,934
No!
Just one date!
157
00:05:35,936 --> 00:05:38,103
Talk to her!
Bushido code!
158
00:05:38,105 --> 00:05:38,970
Talking won't help.
159
00:05:38,972 --> 00:05:40,572
Lainey doesn't like
anything about you.
160
00:05:40,574 --> 00:05:42,607
Bushido code!
You must do this!
161
00:05:42,609 --> 00:05:43,275
Oh, my god.
162
00:05:43,277 --> 00:05:45,577
If I do this, will you stop
saying "bushido code"?
163
00:05:45,579 --> 00:05:46,978
According to bushido code,
yes.
164
00:05:46,980 --> 00:05:50,148
Fine. I'll tell her to go
have some pizza with you.
165
00:05:50,150 --> 00:05:52,384
Yes!
First step, pizza.
166
00:05:52,386 --> 00:05:55,253
Second step, we express
our love physically.
167
00:05:55,255 --> 00:05:56,822
Third step.
168
00:05:56,824 --> 00:05:57,923
Ow.
169
00:05:57,925 --> 00:05:59,324
That is not the way
of the samurai!
170
00:05:59,326 --> 00:06:02,861
Adult adam:
As barry was laying down the laws of the bushido code,
171
00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:05,697
My dad was laying down some laws of his own.
172
00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:09,234
Okay, now that she's moved in
your giant speakers
173
00:06:09,236 --> 00:06:11,169
And your
king-size waterbed,
174
00:06:11,171 --> 00:06:14,606
It's time to go over
the rules of the house.
175
00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:16,441
These are more
like suggestions,
176
00:06:16,443 --> 00:06:17,275
Nothing hard and fast.
177
00:06:17,277 --> 00:06:22,013
Rule number 1,
do not touch the thermostat.
178
00:06:22,015 --> 00:06:22,647
Touch it?
179
00:06:22,649 --> 00:06:25,650
You've already taped it off
like a crazy person.
180
00:06:25,652 --> 00:06:28,887
Rule number 2,
what's ours is yours.
181
00:06:28,889 --> 00:06:32,124
Rule number 3,
ignore rule number 2.
182
00:06:32,126 --> 00:06:34,092
What's mine is mine.
183
00:06:34,160 --> 00:06:35,627
Rule 4,
184
00:06:35,629 --> 00:06:37,462
No coming in after 10:00.
185
00:06:37,464 --> 00:06:39,664
10:00 in the morning
or 10:00 in the evening?
186
00:06:39,666 --> 00:06:42,100
Why would anyone come in
at 10:00 in the morning?
187
00:06:42,102 --> 00:06:45,670
Why would anyone come in
at 10:00 in the evening?
188
00:06:45,672 --> 00:06:46,471
Rule number 5,
189
00:06:46,473 --> 00:06:50,275
Mandatory hugs every time
you walk through the door.
190
00:06:50,277 --> 00:06:54,179
Rule 6,
no loud music, no parties.
191
00:06:54,181 --> 00:06:55,747
Are these written down
somewhere?
192
00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:57,682
I... I'm kind of
losing track.
193
00:06:57,684 --> 00:07:01,520
Okay, rule 6 1/2,
we love you.
194
00:07:01,522 --> 00:07:02,921
That's not even a rule!
195
00:07:02,923 --> 00:07:04,689
Everyone, just relax.
196
00:07:04,691 --> 00:07:06,858
You've opened
your home to me,
197
00:07:06,860 --> 00:07:09,461
And I'm gonna
respect your wishes.
198
00:07:09,463 --> 00:07:12,364
You see, honey?
This is gonna be great.
199
00:07:12,366 --> 00:07:13,331
Adult adam:
And with that,
200
00:07:13,333 --> 00:07:15,167
We had a new family member under our roof.
201
00:07:15,169 --> 00:07:17,736
Fortunately, this one was a responsible adult
202
00:07:17,738 --> 00:07:21,473
Who would never disobey my dad's insane rules.
203
00:07:21,741 --> 00:07:23,308
Or not.
204
00:07:23,976 --> 00:07:25,277
Max!
205
00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:26,144
It's on max!
206
00:07:26,146 --> 00:07:28,246
(jazz music playing loudly)
he touched it!
207
00:07:28,248 --> 00:07:29,014
He touched
the thermostat!
208
00:07:29,016 --> 00:07:32,083
God only knows how much
money we burned in cold air!
209
00:07:32,085 --> 00:07:34,753
I'll bake him some cookies
and talk to him about it.
210
00:07:34,755 --> 00:07:37,489
No cookies!
Do you hear that loud music?
211
00:07:37,491 --> 00:07:39,291
He's breaking
all of my rules!
212
00:07:39,293 --> 00:07:40,659
Here.
This will take the edge off.
213
00:07:40,661 --> 00:07:43,829
Why are you bringing me
a delicious martini right now?
214
00:07:43,831 --> 00:07:46,331
Pops is schooling me
in the art of mixology
215
00:07:46,333 --> 00:07:48,400
So I can bartend
his parties.
216
00:07:48,402 --> 00:07:49,100
Unacceptable!
217
00:07:49,102 --> 00:07:51,002
All of this
is unacceptable!
218
00:07:51,004 --> 00:07:51,636
Get rid of this.
219
00:07:51,638 --> 00:07:53,104
He's just testing
our boundaries.
220
00:07:53,106 --> 00:07:55,140
If we push him too hard,
he'll rebel more.
221
00:07:55,142 --> 00:07:58,076
You're talking about him like
he's one of our dumb kids,
222
00:07:58,078 --> 00:08:00,145
But he's not!
He's worse!
223
00:08:00,147 --> 00:08:00,946
I can't ground him!
224
00:08:00,948 --> 00:08:03,482
Adult adam:
My dad had reached his boiling point.
225
00:08:03,484 --> 00:08:06,351
Unfortunately, he didn't know pops was on a hot date.
226
00:08:06,353 --> 00:08:08,653
Albert! Turn it off!
(woman screams)
227
00:08:08,655 --> 00:08:10,956
Oh, my god!
(thud)
228
00:08:13,926 --> 00:08:14,826
This is not my fault.
229
00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:17,462
I had a necktie
hanging on the door.
230
00:08:17,464 --> 00:08:19,064
When a necktie's
on the door,
231
00:08:19,066 --> 00:08:20,932
The pants
are on the floor.
232
00:08:20,934 --> 00:08:22,400
Everyone knows that.
233
00:08:22,402 --> 00:08:24,569
I can't unsee
what I just saw.
234
00:08:24,571 --> 00:08:25,804
Oh, my god.
Oh, my god.
235
00:08:25,806 --> 00:08:28,406
It was like
a couple of hairless cats
236
00:08:28,408 --> 00:08:30,609
Fighting in a pile
of pizza dough.
237
00:08:30,611 --> 00:08:32,477
It was a very bad
low angle.
238
00:08:32,479 --> 00:08:35,614
That's it, bevy.
He's going to shady willows.
239
00:08:35,616 --> 00:08:37,649
Wait. Shady willows
is on the table?
240
00:08:37,651 --> 00:08:39,017
Bup, bup, bup,
bup, bup, bup, bup.
241
00:08:39,019 --> 00:08:41,052
Murray, we agreed
not to mention that place.
242
00:08:41,054 --> 00:08:43,121
Why not?
I love it there.
243
00:08:43,123 --> 00:08:45,257
No! Family takes care
of family,
244
00:08:45,259 --> 00:08:50,128
And I am not gonna
let a few tiny mishaps
change that.
245
00:08:50,663 --> 00:08:52,230
Aah!
246
00:08:52,298 --> 00:08:56,101
It appears I have popped
another waterbed
247
00:08:56,103 --> 00:08:59,304
While entertaining
a female friend.
248
00:08:59,306 --> 00:09:00,539
You should go.
249
00:09:00,541 --> 00:09:02,040
I should go.
250
00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:03,542
All right.
251
00:09:03,544 --> 00:09:05,510
That's the last of it.
252
00:09:06,345 --> 00:09:06,811
(sighs)
253
00:09:06,813 --> 00:09:08,413
Let's get you
to shady willows.
254
00:09:08,415 --> 00:09:10,282
And step on it
so I don't miss salsa class.
255
00:09:10,284 --> 00:09:14,519
(engine turns over)
that place is crawling
with hot widows.
256
00:09:14,521 --> 00:09:15,453
No!
257
00:09:15,455 --> 00:09:16,054
(sighs)
258
00:09:16,056 --> 00:09:18,590
He's not leaving!
You'll have to run me over!
259
00:09:18,592 --> 00:09:20,659
Just nudge her a bit.
She'll move.
260
00:09:20,661 --> 00:09:23,061
I'm not gonna hit her
with the car, al.
261
00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:24,729
Not hit. Nudge.
262
00:09:24,731 --> 00:09:25,764
Beverly:
Shame on you.
263
00:09:25,766 --> 00:09:27,566
Family takes care
of family.
264
00:09:27,568 --> 00:09:31,836
You keep saying that,
but that's what we're doing.
265
00:09:31,838 --> 00:09:35,073
We're taking your dad
to a place he wants to be.
266
00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:35,574
And then what?
267
00:09:35,576 --> 00:09:38,209
We teach our kids
it's okay to abandon us,
268
00:09:38,211 --> 00:09:39,945
To just
pack up our bags
269
00:09:39,947 --> 00:09:41,546
And throw us out
on an ice floe
270
00:09:41,548 --> 00:09:43,315
And let us drift off
into nothingness?
271
00:09:43,317 --> 00:09:44,683
This sounds like
you're more concerned
272
00:09:44,685 --> 00:09:45,884
With what this means
for you.
273
00:09:45,886 --> 00:09:48,186
No, this has nothing to do
with my greatest fear
274
00:09:48,188 --> 00:09:49,688
Of being alone
when I'm old.
275
00:09:49,690 --> 00:09:51,890
This is about family.
276
00:09:51,892 --> 00:09:52,524
Oh!
277
00:09:52,526 --> 00:09:54,726
So that's why
you're against this.
278
00:09:54,728 --> 00:09:57,495
You're afraid
that our stupid children
279
00:09:57,497 --> 00:09:59,164
Will put you
into a home.
280
00:09:59,166 --> 00:10:01,399
Don't spin this around
on me.
281
00:10:01,401 --> 00:10:03,201
This is about my father,
282
00:10:03,203 --> 00:10:04,402
About my mantra...
283
00:10:04,404 --> 00:10:06,204
Family takes care
of beverly.
284
00:10:06,206 --> 00:10:07,739
I mean family.
You know what?
285
00:10:07,741 --> 00:10:09,674
That was a bad slip,
and I admit that.
286
00:10:09,676 --> 00:10:13,144
Put your seat belt on.
I'm gonna nudge her.
287
00:10:13,146 --> 00:10:14,346
Good for you.
288
00:10:14,348 --> 00:10:15,981
(tires screech)
289
00:10:16,415 --> 00:10:17,415
Don't you nudge me.
290
00:10:17,417 --> 00:10:19,117
Oh, I'm nudging you!
291
00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:20,652
Don't you nudge me!
292
00:10:20,654 --> 00:10:23,154
Murray:
You've been nudged!
This isn't over,
293
00:10:23,156 --> 00:10:24,956
Not by a long shot, mister!
294
00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:29,728
I will (bleep) (bleep)
(bleep).
295
00:10:31,664 --> 00:10:32,864
So!
296
00:10:32,866 --> 00:10:35,400
Saw you talking
to lainey this morning.
297
00:10:35,402 --> 00:10:37,135
We all set?
298
00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:38,370
What are you wearing?
299
00:10:38,372 --> 00:10:40,739
It's my fanciest
flavor flav clock.
300
00:10:40,741 --> 00:10:43,575
Or should I go digital?
Show her I'm a modern man.
301
00:10:43,577 --> 00:10:45,310
Put your clock back
on your nightstand.
302
00:10:45,312 --> 00:10:47,178
I talked to lainey
about this weekend.
303
00:10:47,180 --> 00:10:48,213
It's a no-go.
304
00:10:48,215 --> 00:10:49,514
Oh, it's a scheduling issue?
305
00:10:49,516 --> 00:10:51,650
Tell her I'm available
Monday through Friday
306
00:10:51,652 --> 00:10:54,452
And every other weekend ever
plus all other weekdays.
307
00:10:54,454 --> 00:10:56,988
Yeah, no,
that's not the issue.
308
00:10:56,990 --> 00:10:58,356
She thinks you're...
309
00:10:58,358 --> 00:11:01,059
How do I put this gently?
Gross.
310
00:11:01,061 --> 00:11:01,493
What?
311
00:11:01,495 --> 00:11:03,228
Did you tell her
I can bench 200?
Yep.
312
00:11:03,230 --> 00:11:06,631
Did you tell her I can pop,
like, three wheelies in a row?
I did.
313
00:11:06,633 --> 00:11:08,833
Did you tell her
I'm a self-taught dancer?
314
00:11:08,835 --> 00:11:09,634
She was not impressed.
315
00:11:09,636 --> 00:11:11,169
Did you tell her
that I give no excuses
316
00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:12,437
And take no prisoners?
No dice.
317
00:11:12,439 --> 00:11:14,039
Did you tell her
I'm silky smooth
318
00:11:14,041 --> 00:11:14,973
But cut from steel?
Totally.
319
00:11:14,975 --> 00:11:17,242
Did you tell her
I can kick as high
as my head
320
00:11:17,244 --> 00:11:18,843
And I used to own
a python?
321
00:11:18,845 --> 00:11:21,546
I told her everything.
No go.
322
00:11:21,548 --> 00:11:23,348
I thought...
323
00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,316
I actually had a shot.
324
00:11:25,318 --> 00:11:27,018
Aw...
325
00:11:27,353 --> 00:11:28,019
You don't.
326
00:11:28,021 --> 00:11:29,554
I'm never gonna
find a girl.
327
00:11:29,556 --> 00:11:31,790
Seriously, I'm gonna
be alone forever.
328
00:11:31,792 --> 00:11:33,024
It's not fair!
329
00:11:33,026 --> 00:11:34,726
Stop being so dramatic.
330
00:11:34,728 --> 00:11:35,860
Bushido code.
331
00:11:35,862 --> 00:11:37,829
I've been rejected
and shamed.
332
00:11:37,831 --> 00:11:40,165
Let these pop rocks
and soda be the sword
333
00:11:40,167 --> 00:11:42,200
That brings me
an honorable samurai death.
334
00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:44,069
I talked to
the science teacher.
335
00:11:44,071 --> 00:11:44,636
It's not real.
336
00:11:44,638 --> 00:11:46,237
Well, tell that
to the chemical reaction
337
00:11:46,239 --> 00:11:48,239
Happening in my mouth
right now.
338
00:11:48,241 --> 00:11:49,040
This is science.
339
00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:50,742
Adult adam:
While barry had given up on his future,
340
00:11:50,744 --> 00:11:54,412
My mom was trying to secure hers.
341
00:11:54,513 --> 00:11:55,480
Hey, snuggle bear.
342
00:11:55,482 --> 00:11:59,984
Came to cheer you up.
I know how upset you must be.
343
00:12:00,386 --> 00:12:02,387
About what?
344
00:12:02,888 --> 00:12:03,988
Well, I don't
want you to think
345
00:12:03,990 --> 00:12:07,258
In this family
we abandon our parents.
346
00:12:07,260 --> 00:12:08,526
Pops should be living here,
347
00:12:08,528 --> 00:12:11,329
Just like how I'm
gonna be living with you.
348
00:12:11,430 --> 00:12:12,664
Wait. What?
349
00:12:12,666 --> 00:12:14,666
Since when are you
living with me?
350
00:12:14,668 --> 00:12:15,366
What about erica?
351
00:12:15,368 --> 00:12:18,136
Lovely girl, but deal with
those mood swings?
352
00:12:18,138 --> 00:12:19,304
No, thank you.
353
00:12:19,306 --> 00:12:21,005
Well, then
go live with barry.
354
00:12:21,007 --> 00:12:22,640
Oh, sweetie,
it's more than likely
355
00:12:22,642 --> 00:12:23,575
We'll be taking care
of him.
356
00:12:23,577 --> 00:12:27,545
What? So now I'm taking care
of you and barry?
357
00:12:27,547 --> 00:12:28,213
Just me.
358
00:12:28,215 --> 00:12:29,914
We'll find
a place for barry.
359
00:12:29,916 --> 00:12:31,483
Maybe the merchant marine
or a commune.
360
00:12:31,485 --> 00:12:35,086
Why does barry get
to live on a commune
while I'm stuck with you?
361
00:12:35,088 --> 00:12:35,920
Hon, not just me.
362
00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:37,255
You'll have
your lovely wife
363
00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:39,457
And four beautiful boys
for support.
364
00:12:39,459 --> 00:12:42,427
No way. I won't have
room for you, too.
365
00:12:42,429 --> 00:12:43,628
Well, we'll convert
the garage
366
00:12:43,630 --> 00:12:45,830
Into a cozy,
little in-law suite.
367
00:12:45,832 --> 00:12:47,499
The garage
is my space!
368
00:12:47,501 --> 00:12:48,399
That's where
I watch movies
369
00:12:48,401 --> 00:12:50,068
And display
my collectible figurines.
370
00:12:50,070 --> 00:12:52,203
Oh, you can move all that
down to the basement.
371
00:12:52,205 --> 00:12:54,773
So now I'm getting banished
down to the basement?
372
00:12:54,775 --> 00:12:57,609
I work my ass off,
and this is all I get?
373
00:12:57,611 --> 00:12:58,576
Fine.
Take the garage.
374
00:12:58,578 --> 00:13:01,613
I'll just live down in the
basement like a mole person.
375
00:13:01,615 --> 00:13:02,514
Is that what you want?
376
00:13:02,516 --> 00:13:03,948
Why can't you just
stay in a hotel
377
00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:05,650
And visit
every once in a while?
378
00:13:05,652 --> 00:13:06,284
A hotel?
379
00:13:06,286 --> 00:13:07,552
Where the maid
can steal my jewelry
380
00:13:07,554 --> 00:13:10,522
And someone can break in
and clonk me on the head?
381
00:13:10,524 --> 00:13:12,090
Fine!
Don't visit, then!
382
00:13:12,092 --> 00:13:15,326
Oh, I know
where this is coming from.
383
00:13:15,328 --> 00:13:15,894
Your wife.
384
00:13:15,896 --> 00:13:17,162
You said
she was lovely!
385
00:13:17,164 --> 00:13:18,897
When it's convenient
for her.
386
00:13:18,899 --> 00:13:21,166
Why are we even
talking about this?
387
00:13:21,168 --> 00:13:21,933
I'm just a little boy!
388
00:13:21,935 --> 00:13:23,768
Where are you going,
young man?
389
00:13:23,770 --> 00:13:25,203
To stay with pops!
You're crazy.
390
00:13:25,205 --> 00:13:28,106
Adult adam: While I headed down to shady willows,
391
00:13:28,108 --> 00:13:30,308
My mom headed up to my treehouse
392
00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:32,877
To contemplate her future.
393
00:13:35,247 --> 00:13:38,316
What are you
doing up here?
394
00:13:38,717 --> 00:13:39,884
I needed
to eat my feelings,
395
00:13:39,886 --> 00:13:43,488
And this is where adam hid
his Halloween candy from you.
396
00:13:43,490 --> 00:13:44,289
Anything good left?
397
00:13:44,291 --> 00:13:46,291
Just these awful
circus peanuts.
398
00:13:46,293 --> 00:13:48,560
Yeah,
nobody wants those.
399
00:13:49,395 --> 00:13:51,696
Just like me.
400
00:13:51,698 --> 00:13:54,566
I'm the circus peanut
of mothers.
401
00:13:54,568 --> 00:13:55,533
What are you talking about?
402
00:13:55,535 --> 00:13:57,135
Adam won't let me
live with him when I'm old.
403
00:13:57,137 --> 00:13:58,903
God knows
erica won't take me in.
404
00:13:58,905 --> 00:14:02,574
So looks like this is
where I'm gonna spend
my golden years,
405
00:14:02,576 --> 00:14:04,809
Right up here
in this treehouse.
406
00:14:04,811 --> 00:14:05,543
Well, what about barry?
407
00:14:05,545 --> 00:14:07,545
Oh, well,
you've solved that problem.
408
00:14:07,547 --> 00:14:10,348
Please reserve me
the master suite
409
00:14:10,350 --> 00:14:13,218
In his rap mansion
in the clouds.
410
00:14:13,220 --> 00:14:14,152
Trust me, bevy.
411
00:14:14,154 --> 00:14:17,655
Our kids will
never abandon you.
412
00:14:17,657 --> 00:14:18,389
How do you know?
413
00:14:18,391 --> 00:14:20,558
Look at how well
you treat your own dad.
414
00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:21,693
You think
they don't notice that?
415
00:14:21,695 --> 00:14:25,430
Well, I guess I am
pretty blatant with my love.
416
00:14:25,432 --> 00:14:26,564
Of course you are.
417
00:14:26,566 --> 00:14:27,799
And it's like
you always say.
418
00:14:27,801 --> 00:14:31,736
Family takes care
of family.
419
00:14:31,871 --> 00:14:33,004
And speaking of which,
420
00:14:33,006 --> 00:14:35,940
I could use some help
getting down from here.
421
00:14:36,375 --> 00:14:37,775
(chuckles)
422
00:14:37,777 --> 00:14:38,376
No.
423
00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:39,611
Adult adam: My mom may have been kidding,
424
00:14:39,613 --> 00:14:42,580
But barry's love for lainey was no joke.
425
00:14:42,582 --> 00:14:43,781
(gasps) lainey!
426
00:14:43,783 --> 00:14:44,983
Okay.
427
00:14:44,985 --> 00:14:48,286
Before you say anything,
just hear me out.
428
00:14:48,288 --> 00:14:50,688
I know erica gave you
the big sell on me,
429
00:14:50,690 --> 00:14:54,092
But I can't just give up on us
without a fight.
430
00:14:54,094 --> 00:14:54,959
What's happening?
431
00:14:54,961 --> 00:14:56,661
I'm-a tell you
what's happening.
432
00:14:56,663 --> 00:14:58,162
Jtp, drop the beat.
433
00:14:58,164 --> 00:14:59,364
(beatboxing)
434
00:14:59,366 --> 00:15:03,234
¶ I'd do anything for a girl named lainey
435
00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:03,801
Yeah!
436
00:15:03,803 --> 00:15:05,503
¶ I'll punch a tiger, swim the allegheny
437
00:15:05,505 --> 00:15:07,739
¶ I know it's creepy 'cause I'm her best friend's brother
438
00:15:07,741 --> 00:15:10,708
¶ but I love her, and we should be together
439
00:15:10,710 --> 00:15:13,745
¶ like joanie loves chachi, tango loves cash
440
00:15:13,747 --> 00:15:14,746
¶ she the turner to my hooch
441
00:15:14,748 --> 00:15:16,080
¶ I'll be the bangers in your mash
442
00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:17,548
Oh, my god! Stop!
(beatboxing stops)
443
00:15:17,550 --> 00:15:19,250
Don't stop!
(beatboxing resumes)
444
00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:20,852
¶ "l" to the "y" to the "n" to the "e"
445
00:15:20,854 --> 00:15:24,689
¶ that spells lainey, that's a rap from big tasty
446
00:15:24,691 --> 00:15:26,958
First of all, you spelled
my name horribly wrong.
447
00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:29,994
And secondly, erica never
talked to me about you.
448
00:15:29,996 --> 00:15:31,562
What? But...
449
00:15:31,564 --> 00:15:33,164
She said that...
450
00:15:33,166 --> 00:15:34,832
Erica swore to me!
451
00:15:34,834 --> 00:15:35,533
We had an agreement!
452
00:15:35,535 --> 00:15:37,502
She talked me up,
but you said no.
453
00:15:37,504 --> 00:15:38,770
Yeah,
that didn't happen.
454
00:15:38,772 --> 00:15:39,637
Adult adam:
In that moment,
455
00:15:39,639 --> 00:15:43,374
Barry knew the next thing he said had to be perfect.
456
00:15:48,981 --> 00:15:49,714
Lies.
457
00:15:49,716 --> 00:15:51,983
You have no honor
whatsoever!
458
00:15:51,985 --> 00:15:53,451
I'm okay with that.
459
00:15:53,453 --> 00:15:56,154
Don't you walk away
from me.
460
00:15:56,156 --> 00:15:57,922
I saved your life.
461
00:15:57,924 --> 00:15:58,589
Ow.
462
00:15:58,591 --> 00:16:00,124
And this is
how you repay me?
463
00:16:00,126 --> 00:16:01,159
You should be
thanking me.
464
00:16:01,161 --> 00:16:02,627
I was just trying to
spare your feelings.
465
00:16:02,629 --> 00:16:05,363
I didn't expect you to do
some love rap to lainey
466
00:16:05,365 --> 00:16:06,064
About turner
and hooch.
467
00:16:06,066 --> 00:16:07,865
They weren't even
a couple, dude.
468
00:16:07,867 --> 00:16:08,599
One is a dog.
469
00:16:08,601 --> 00:16:12,036
That dog took a bullet
for tom hanks!
470
00:16:12,038 --> 00:16:13,738
That's love!
471
00:16:13,906 --> 00:16:14,772
Aah!
472
00:16:14,774 --> 00:16:15,673
I'm in so much pain!
473
00:16:15,675 --> 00:16:17,275
Yeah, yeah.
Your heart is broken.
474
00:16:17,277 --> 00:16:19,644
Just stop
with the dramatics.
475
00:16:19,646 --> 00:16:20,044
No!
476
00:16:20,046 --> 00:16:22,613
There's something wrong
with my insides! Aah!
477
00:16:22,615 --> 00:16:25,583
Oh, no.
Oh, god, it's happening!
478
00:16:25,585 --> 00:16:28,219
Pop rocks and cola!
I'm mikey!
479
00:16:28,221 --> 00:16:29,420
It's not real!
480
00:16:29,422 --> 00:16:30,188
Oh, this is real.
481
00:16:30,190 --> 00:16:31,889
It just took longer
to take me down
482
00:16:31,891 --> 00:16:33,725
'cause my body's
in peak condition.
483
00:16:33,727 --> 00:16:34,425
Oh, yeah.
484
00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:36,160
You did this to me.
485
00:16:36,162 --> 00:16:37,729
This is on you!
486
00:16:37,731 --> 00:16:39,364
Barry.
487
00:16:39,366 --> 00:16:40,965
Get up!
488
00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:41,866
Barry?
489
00:16:41,868 --> 00:16:44,035
Adult adam: As barry was rushed over to the e.R.,
490
00:16:44,037 --> 00:16:45,336
My mom rushed to fetch me
491
00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:48,906
From pops' new luxurious retirement community.
492
00:16:48,908 --> 00:16:51,376
Hi, daddy.
Can I come in?
493
00:16:51,378 --> 00:16:53,411
There's no tie on the door.
494
00:16:53,413 --> 00:16:55,279
You're good to go.
495
00:16:57,216 --> 00:16:58,916
Beverly: Wow.
You did all this?
496
00:16:58,918 --> 00:17:02,020
Hey, you get it
from somewhere.
497
00:17:02,087 --> 00:17:04,455
Are you sure
you'll be okay here?
498
00:17:04,457 --> 00:17:07,325
Bev,
this is where I belong.
499
00:17:07,327 --> 00:17:09,260
Good food,
good people.
500
00:17:09,262 --> 00:17:11,629
And you wouldn't believe
how far a full head of hair
501
00:17:11,631 --> 00:17:14,866
Will get you in here
with the ladies.
502
00:17:15,467 --> 00:17:18,036
Well,
I'm happy for you.
503
00:17:18,038 --> 00:17:20,505
And, uh, thanks
for looking after adam.
504
00:17:20,507 --> 00:17:21,172
Ah.
505
00:17:21,174 --> 00:17:24,575
A little time away
was the best thing for him.
506
00:17:24,577 --> 00:17:25,643
Adam: Ahh!
507
00:17:25,645 --> 00:17:27,712
Just took
a good schvitz.
508
00:17:27,714 --> 00:17:28,713
Oh, and I
ran into irma.
509
00:17:28,715 --> 00:17:30,948
She invited us over
to play some gin rummy.
510
00:17:30,950 --> 00:17:33,084
Uh, sweetie, I think
it's time to come home.
511
00:17:33,086 --> 00:17:35,019
No.
I'm never coming home.
512
00:17:35,021 --> 00:17:36,487
This place has a sauna,
513
00:17:36,489 --> 00:17:38,456
An early-bird
dinner at 4:30,
514
00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:40,091
And a seat
in every shower.
515
00:17:40,093 --> 00:17:42,994
All my life,
I have been washing my body
516
00:17:42,996 --> 00:17:45,163
Standing up like a yutz.
517
00:17:45,464 --> 00:17:47,498
He's only been here
for two hours.
518
00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:51,669
Well, the kid knows
a good thing when he sees it.
519
00:17:52,204 --> 00:17:52,737
(snaps fingers)
520
00:17:52,739 --> 00:17:54,972
(modern english's
I melt with you playing)
521
00:17:54,974 --> 00:17:57,909
Wow.
An obstructed bowel.
522
00:17:57,911 --> 00:17:58,643
Didn't see that coming.
523
00:17:58,645 --> 00:18:00,812
Who knew eating
12 full-sized taffy bars
524
00:18:00,814 --> 00:18:03,581
And drinking
all that pink goop
would block me up.
525
00:18:03,583 --> 00:18:05,149
Most people.
526
00:18:05,151 --> 00:18:06,684
So, after all of that,
527
00:18:06,686 --> 00:18:08,786
You saved
my life for real.
528
00:18:08,788 --> 00:18:09,654
I did, didn't I?
529
00:18:09,656 --> 00:18:10,688
Stupid bushido code.
530
00:18:10,690 --> 00:18:11,522
Now I'm forever
in your debt.
531
00:18:11,524 --> 00:18:15,660
Actually, I thought
today I'd be the one
to do you a favor.
532
00:18:15,662 --> 00:18:16,828
Adult adam:
In the end, for erica,
533
00:18:16,830 --> 00:18:18,296
It wasn't about the bushido code.
534
00:18:18,298 --> 00:18:21,732
It was about being a good big sister.
535
00:18:21,734 --> 00:18:26,304
¶ I'll stop the world and melt with you
536
00:18:27,940 --> 00:18:28,906
¶ you've seen the difference
537
00:18:28,908 --> 00:18:31,209
¶ and it's getting better all the time
538
00:18:31,211 --> 00:18:32,210
Hey.
Hi.
539
00:18:32,212 --> 00:18:34,078
I've got to make
a phone call.
540
00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:39,517
¶ dream of better lives, the kind which never hate
541
00:18:39,519 --> 00:18:41,119
So, how's your butt?
542
00:18:41,121 --> 00:18:41,552
Horrible.
543
00:18:41,554 --> 00:18:43,421
But it's not even
the worst part of my week.
544
00:18:43,423 --> 00:18:45,723
Yeah.
About that love rap...
545
00:18:45,725 --> 00:18:47,592
Let's just forget
it ever happened.
546
00:18:47,594 --> 00:18:49,527
Know what? No.
547
00:18:49,529 --> 00:18:51,829
I said it,
and I stand by it.
548
00:18:51,831 --> 00:18:56,801
Oh. Well, your persistence
is misguided and annoying,
549
00:18:57,269 --> 00:18:58,636
But kind of cute.
550
00:18:58,638 --> 00:19:00,872
¶ I'll stop the world and melt with you
551
00:19:00,874 --> 00:19:02,807
So, I heard this place
has really good pizza.
552
00:19:02,809 --> 00:19:03,841
You want to grab a slice?
553
00:19:03,843 --> 00:19:05,576
I can't eat
for another 24 hours...
554
00:19:05,578 --> 00:19:07,378
¶ you've seen the difference
555
00:19:07,380 --> 00:19:08,146
...But I can
sit with you.
556
00:19:08,148 --> 00:19:11,816
¶ and it's getting better all the time
557
00:19:11,818 --> 00:19:12,717
Hey.
558
00:19:12,719 --> 00:19:14,118
Kind of early
for bedtime.
559
00:19:14,120 --> 00:19:17,889
Well, eating dinner at 4:30
kind of threw me off.
560
00:19:17,891 --> 00:19:18,756
Oh.
561
00:19:18,758 --> 00:19:20,691
Um, you want some tucks?
562
00:19:20,693 --> 00:19:22,493
I'm too old for tucks.
563
00:19:23,428 --> 00:19:24,495
Listen.
564
00:19:24,497 --> 00:19:26,397
I'm sorry
I freaked you out.
565
00:19:26,399 --> 00:19:28,166
It's not your job
to take care of me.
566
00:19:28,168 --> 00:19:30,067
It's my job
to take care of you.
567
00:19:30,069 --> 00:19:32,503
But what's gonna happen
when I grow up?
568
00:19:32,505 --> 00:19:36,040
Well, we have a long time
to figure that out, shmoopie.
569
00:19:36,042 --> 00:19:38,075
A long time.
570
00:19:38,577 --> 00:19:40,745
Sure you don't want
a tuck?
571
00:19:41,180 --> 00:19:41,779
Maybe a little one.
572
00:19:41,781 --> 00:19:46,117
¶ there's nothing you and I won't do
573
00:19:47,953 --> 00:19:50,454
¶ I'll stop the world... ¶
hey, mom?
574
00:19:50,456 --> 00:19:51,889
I'm sure
when the time comes,
575
00:19:51,891 --> 00:19:54,625
I'll find some space
for you in my house.
576
00:19:54,627 --> 00:19:55,359
Really?
577
00:19:55,361 --> 00:19:57,895
Yeah. I'll always
make room for you.
578
00:19:57,897 --> 00:19:58,296
(sighs)
579
00:19:58,298 --> 00:20:00,031
Adult adam: Sure, we had our differences, but my mom was right.
580
00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:04,101
Family takes care of family, and that's no urban legend.
581
00:20:04,103 --> 00:20:05,269
Got to admit,
582
00:20:05,271 --> 00:20:07,305
This is my first date
in a hospital.
583
00:20:07,307 --> 00:20:09,207
Wait.
This is a date?
584
00:20:09,209 --> 00:20:11,075
Well, pity date.
585
00:20:11,077 --> 00:20:11,709
I'll take it.
586
00:20:11,711 --> 00:20:13,978
Adult adam:
And without family, barry's worst day
587
00:20:13,980 --> 00:20:16,380
Wouldn't have become his best day.
588
00:20:16,382 --> 00:20:18,449
(door opens)
beverly: There you are!
589
00:20:18,451 --> 00:20:19,917
Adult adam:
And then his worst day.
590
00:20:19,919 --> 00:20:20,851
My delicious little baby,
591
00:20:20,853 --> 00:20:23,988
I am so sorry I wasn't home
when they called.
592
00:20:23,990 --> 00:20:25,389
Mom, please!
593
00:20:25,391 --> 00:20:28,125
Your poor,
clogged bottom.
594
00:20:28,193 --> 00:20:30,461
Nurse! Nurse!
595
00:20:32,030 --> 00:20:34,198
Man: Say something
for the camera.
596
00:20:34,200 --> 00:20:37,802
I love him.
I love him. Mwah!
597
00:20:44,009 --> 00:20:45,943
(coughs)
598
00:20:46,178 --> 00:20:47,945
Don't worry.
Mama's got this.
599
00:20:47,947 --> 00:20:49,180
Arms up. Arms up.
600
00:20:49,182 --> 00:20:49,914
(coughs)
601
00:20:49,916 --> 00:20:53,751
Dude! You just, like,
saved my life!
602
00:20:53,753 --> 00:20:54,252
Thank you.
603
00:20:54,254 --> 00:20:58,022
You don't have to thank me.
It's my job.
604
00:20:58,490 --> 00:21:01,325
But according to bushido code,
605
00:21:01,327 --> 00:21:02,927
You will have to repay me.
606
00:21:02,929 --> 00:21:05,129
You know about bushido code?
607
00:21:05,131 --> 00:21:06,497
Oh, I watched shogun.
608
00:21:06,499 --> 00:21:07,198
(inhales deeply)
609
00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:10,001
That richard chamberlain,
meow.
610
00:21:10,003 --> 00:21:11,302
Fine. What do you want?
611
00:21:11,304 --> 00:21:13,170
I want snuggies.
Aw, come on!
612
00:21:13,172 --> 00:21:16,274
I want huggies and cuddlies
and smoochies.
613
00:21:16,276 --> 00:21:17,675
No!
I want them.
614
00:21:17,677 --> 00:21:18,676
No!
I want them.
615
00:21:18,678 --> 00:21:20,344
I choose a warrior's death
instead!
616
00:21:20,346 --> 00:21:22,313
Put the taco
back in my mouth!
617
00:21:22,315 --> 00:21:25,216
Bushido code!
You have no honor!
618
00:21:25,218 --> 00:21:26,917
Mwah, mwah, mwah.
51375
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