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1
00:00:02,805 --> 00:00:05,205
- How you doing over there?
- I'm good.
2
00:00:05,307 --> 00:00:07,341
- Really good.
- Good.
3
00:00:09,712 --> 00:00:11,211
Is it weird that I'm good?
4
00:00:11,461 --> 00:00:13,247
No, it's good that you're good.
5
00:00:13,349 --> 00:00:15,781
Good. Well, I'm good.
6
00:00:17,539 --> 00:00:19,086
Every mom dreams of
the day when they drop
7
00:00:19,111 --> 00:00:22,446
their 42-year-old daughter off
at the airport to go to school.
8
00:00:25,273 --> 00:00:26,994
And I did it all by myself.
9
00:00:27,312 --> 00:00:28,406
Hey, I'm here.
10
00:00:28,431 --> 00:00:31,398
- Oh, not the dropping off, the raising.
- Oh.
11
00:00:31,818 --> 00:00:33,309
I mean, I wasn't there the whole time.
12
00:00:33,334 --> 00:00:34,979
But I was definitely
there for the beginning.
13
00:00:35,594 --> 00:00:38,539
In and out during the middle,
and rock-solid from age 37 on,
14
00:00:38,564 --> 00:00:40,390
you know, the formative years.
15
00:00:41,078 --> 00:00:42,376
You have a lot to be proud of.
16
00:00:42,478 --> 00:00:44,878
Damn right. Georgetown Law School
17
00:00:44,903 --> 00:00:46,970
on a full scholarship.
18
00:00:47,054 --> 00:00:49,994
Phew. Lot of parents would be
in a puddle of tears right now,
19
00:00:50,019 --> 00:00:51,618
but you know what I think of them?
20
00:00:51,797 --> 00:00:53,664
Selfish.
21
00:00:53,689 --> 00:00:55,923
Not me, 'cause I'm focusing
on what she's gonna get,
22
00:00:55,948 --> 00:00:57,581
not what I'm gonna lose.
23
00:00:59,554 --> 00:01:01,239
Which is the most beautiful little girl
24
00:01:01,263 --> 00:01:02,984
a mother could ever have.
25
00:01:03,543 --> 00:01:05,910
And this is why I drove.
26
00:01:05,935 --> 00:01:08,769
Oh, please. You're gonna cry, too.
27
00:01:08,948 --> 00:01:10,181
Am not.
28
00:01:10,734 --> 00:01:13,451
The Father's Day card
she gave you last year?
29
00:01:13,483 --> 00:01:15,223
Why would you do that to me?
30
00:01:15,248 --> 00:01:17,815
'Cause you miss her as much as I do.
31
00:01:17,840 --> 00:01:19,640
I-I do!
32
00:01:23,986 --> 00:01:25,897
You want to go back and
watch the plane take off?
33
00:01:25,921 --> 00:01:27,955
- I do!
- Okay.
34
00:01:41,391 --> 00:01:46,391
- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
-- for www.addic7ed.com --
35
00:01:50,852 --> 00:01:53,327
- Bonnie, alcoholic.
- Hi, Bonnie.
36
00:01:53,352 --> 00:01:56,530
Well, it's been a month since
Adam and I became empty-nesters,
37
00:01:56,555 --> 00:01:58,141
and we are loving it.
38
00:01:58,166 --> 00:02:01,203
We learn something new
about each other every day.
39
00:02:01,228 --> 00:02:03,094
And we learn a lot about Christy, too.
40
00:02:03,119 --> 00:02:04,984
Apparently, she was the one
vacuuming the living room.
41
00:02:07,269 --> 00:02:09,169
And another thing we learned about her,
42
00:02:09,391 --> 00:02:11,545
she doesn't understand time zones.
43
00:02:11,570 --> 00:02:13,481
She's smart enough to get
a scholarship to law school,
44
00:02:13,505 --> 00:02:15,372
but she can't grasp the
fact that her 7:00 a.m.
45
00:02:15,397 --> 00:02:16,863
is my 4:00 a.m.
46
00:02:17,211 --> 00:02:20,444
She's constantly waking me up
'cause she can't subtract three.
47
00:02:21,303 --> 00:02:23,003
Well, my fault.
48
00:02:23,028 --> 00:02:25,672
I should've taken her to
kindergarten once in a while.
49
00:02:26,205 --> 00:02:27,905
Yeah, she's in law school. She's fine.
50
00:02:28,054 --> 00:02:29,820
That's it. Thanks.
51
00:02:29,845 --> 00:02:32,099
Now that Christy's gone,
52
00:02:32,124 --> 00:02:33,423
would you like me to roll my eyes
53
00:02:33,448 --> 00:02:35,148
a little bit more while you share?
54
00:02:36,702 --> 00:02:39,069
- Tammy?
- Tammy, alcoholic.
55
00:02:39,094 --> 00:02:40,031
Hi, Tammy.
56
00:02:40,056 --> 00:02:41,489
Uh, it's my birthday tomorrow.
57
00:02:41,514 --> 00:02:43,812
Uh, not a sober one, a
squeezing out of the womb one.
58
00:02:44,625 --> 00:02:49,450
Normally, I love my
birthday, but not this year.
59
00:02:49,475 --> 00:02:53,220
My dad tracked me down from
prison and sent me a card
60
00:02:53,245 --> 00:02:55,011
saying he's gonna call me tomorrow.
61
00:02:55,947 --> 00:02:58,013
What am I supposed to do with that?
62
00:02:58,241 --> 00:02:59,922
The man killed my mom.
63
00:03:00,717 --> 00:03:03,422
I haven't talked to him since I was 14.
64
00:03:03,447 --> 00:03:05,280
And I don't want to talk to him now.
65
00:03:07,259 --> 00:03:09,860
I know this program is
about second chances,
66
00:03:10,270 --> 00:03:11,856
but does that mean I
have to give him one?
67
00:03:11,881 --> 00:03:14,164
I mean... I don't know.
68
00:03:14,343 --> 00:03:16,590
I'm totally spinning
out over what to do.
69
00:03:17,703 --> 00:03:19,236
Thanks.
70
00:03:21,563 --> 00:03:23,096
Well, now I feel bad for sharing about
71
00:03:23,121 --> 00:03:25,387
how my Jacuzzi's not bubbly enough.
72
00:03:27,746 --> 00:03:29,557
You know, there's a place
where you can get free hot wings
73
00:03:29,581 --> 00:03:30,935
- on your birthday.
- Nice.
74
00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:32,976
Yeah, they give you a
free wing for every year.
75
00:03:33,001 --> 00:03:35,368
It's the only time I'm
honest about my age.
76
00:03:36,927 --> 00:03:39,365
Wow, it is a mess over here.
77
00:03:39,390 --> 00:03:42,685
I know. Christy really did a lot
more cleaning than we thought.
78
00:03:42,710 --> 00:03:44,513
Yeah, well, I'll pick up the slack.
79
00:03:44,538 --> 00:03:46,104
Great. She used to do the coffee urn.
80
00:03:46,191 --> 00:03:48,057
Oh, on it.
81
00:03:48,082 --> 00:03:50,444
Oh, I think we
should throw this one away
82
00:03:50,469 --> 00:03:51,763
and start over.
83
00:03:52,685 --> 00:03:56,386
Girls, don't forget Tammy's
surprise dinner tomorrow.
84
00:03:56,411 --> 00:03:59,646
Get there by 7:00 and
park the car around the corner.
85
00:03:59,678 --> 00:04:02,179
Good. You're as excited as I am.
86
00:04:02,281 --> 00:04:04,381
I'm gonna throw Tammy
87
00:04:04,406 --> 00:04:06,760
a surprise slumber party
tomorrow night at my house.
88
00:04:06,785 --> 00:04:08,151
- Love it.
- Sounds good.
89
00:04:08,176 --> 00:04:10,076
Bonnie, you know I've
been planning a dinner.
90
00:04:10,101 --> 00:04:12,889
- But my idea's better.
- Kind of is.
91
00:04:12,958 --> 00:04:14,891
I've been working on this for weeks.
92
00:04:14,916 --> 00:04:16,160
Well, I'm sorry, but she told me
93
00:04:16,185 --> 00:04:17,429
she really wanted a slumber party.
94
00:04:17,454 --> 00:04:19,254
When did she say that?
95
00:04:20,191 --> 00:04:21,323
When she was 14.
96
00:04:22,524 --> 00:04:24,124
But I'm sure it's still true.
97
00:04:27,755 --> 00:04:30,574
- Oh, damn it.
- What's up?
98
00:04:30,599 --> 00:04:33,366
I accidentally got
"It's a Girl!" balloons.
99
00:04:33,391 --> 00:04:35,068
Well, Tammy is a girl.
100
00:04:36,648 --> 00:04:39,513
I'm sorry, I know you don't like
me to look on the bright side.
101
00:04:40,152 --> 00:04:42,953
I really want to keep Tammy's
mind off her dad calling.
102
00:04:42,978 --> 00:04:45,802
This party has to be perfect,
and I messed up the decorations.
103
00:04:45,827 --> 00:04:47,969
Or you did that on purpose
so, when Jill gets here,
104
00:04:47,993 --> 00:04:50,419
she takes over and
does everything for you.
105
00:04:50,706 --> 00:04:53,307
Look, I didn't marry you
so you could get to know me.
106
00:04:57,269 --> 00:04:58,904
Hey. Hey.
107
00:04:59,857 --> 00:05:01,849
Oh, hey, Adam, are you staying
108
00:05:01,874 --> 00:05:04,200
for the ladies-only party
that's only for ladies?
109
00:05:05,038 --> 00:05:06,677
No, Gus and I are going fishing.
110
00:05:06,702 --> 00:05:08,612
That's code for drinking beer in a cabin
111
00:05:08,637 --> 00:05:10,036
and not fishing at all.
112
00:05:10,215 --> 00:05:12,695
- She's not wrong. Mwah.
- Have fun.
113
00:05:12,751 --> 00:05:13,783
Come on, Gus.
114
00:05:14,965 --> 00:05:16,615
He doesn't even own a rod.
115
00:05:16,640 --> 00:05:18,922
I'm gonna pick one
up at the liquor store!
116
00:05:19,969 --> 00:05:21,535
So...
117
00:05:21,560 --> 00:05:23,627
Am I seeing your decorations
in their entirety?
118
00:05:23,652 --> 00:05:26,013
No. I got baby shower balloons.
119
00:05:27,299 --> 00:05:29,865
Mm-hmm, taking over.
120
00:05:30,366 --> 00:05:32,299
Mm-hmm, letting you.
121
00:05:38,669 --> 00:05:39,835
What's this?
122
00:05:39,860 --> 00:05:41,638
It's the cake you asked me to bring.
123
00:05:41,790 --> 00:05:43,523
But it's from the grocery store.
124
00:05:43,548 --> 00:05:45,315
I thought you'd bake something.
125
00:05:45,494 --> 00:05:47,995
And I thought we'd be at
a nice dinner right now.
126
00:05:48,020 --> 00:05:49,904
Guess we were both wrong.
127
00:05:50,646 --> 00:05:52,245
We don't just go to bed, right?
128
00:05:52,308 --> 00:05:53,508
Don't look at me.
129
00:05:53,836 --> 00:05:55,435
My gosh, did none of you ever go
130
00:05:55,460 --> 00:05:56,771
to a slumber party when you were kids?
131
00:05:56,796 --> 00:05:58,196
Foster care. No friends.
132
00:05:58,221 --> 00:06:00,060
I was strung out on horse.
133
00:06:02,768 --> 00:06:04,367
Oh. Well, lucky for you,
134
00:06:04,392 --> 00:06:07,161
I was extremely popular and
I will guide you through it.
135
00:06:07,606 --> 00:06:09,572
There is an ebb and
flow to a slumber party,
136
00:06:09,597 --> 00:06:11,763
not unlike a poem or a good massage.
137
00:06:13,145 --> 00:06:14,644
She's here. Big smiles.
138
00:06:14,669 --> 00:06:16,747
Not the pageant one, Jill, the real one.
139
00:06:19,526 --> 00:06:21,760
Hey. Remember what you
wanted for your 14th birthday?
140
00:06:21,785 --> 00:06:22,919
- A case of beer?
- No.
141
00:06:22,944 --> 00:06:24,387
- Curly hair? True love?
- No.
142
00:06:24,412 --> 00:06:26,079
No. A slumber party. And here it is!
143
00:06:26,335 --> 00:06:28,068
Surprise!
144
00:06:28,093 --> 00:06:30,504
Oh, my God, you guys. This is amazing!
145
00:06:30,529 --> 00:06:32,195
Look at the flowers and balloons.
146
00:06:32,220 --> 00:06:34,007
And a sign with my name on it.
147
00:06:34,032 --> 00:06:36,933
Oh, there's no way this
could possibly be better.
148
00:06:36,958 --> 00:06:38,958
Unless we had a homemade cake.
149
00:06:43,108 --> 00:06:44,985
Never have I ever
150
00:06:45,010 --> 00:06:47,077
faked a toothache just to get nitrous.
151
00:06:47,102 --> 00:06:48,401
Oh.
152
00:06:48,426 --> 00:06:50,099
So, I drink if I've done it?
153
00:06:50,124 --> 00:06:51,548
Yes.
154
00:06:51,573 --> 00:06:53,372
We've been playing this
game for half an hour.
155
00:06:53,397 --> 00:06:55,130
How is this still a question for you?
156
00:06:55,155 --> 00:06:57,656
The sentence structure
is very confusing.
157
00:06:57,681 --> 00:07:00,482
It should really just
be "have you ever."
158
00:07:00,507 --> 00:07:02,136
Well, normally, you'd
play this game drunk,
159
00:07:02,160 --> 00:07:03,360
so grammar doesn't matter.
160
00:07:04,363 --> 00:07:05,865
Okay, let me try one.
161
00:07:06,513 --> 00:07:08,865
I have never, ever, never...
162
00:07:08,890 --> 00:07:10,857
Oy.
163
00:07:10,882 --> 00:07:13,208
- had sex in a church.
- Mm.
164
00:07:13,233 --> 00:07:15,794
Wait, it was a bris.
Do synagogues count?
165
00:07:15,819 --> 00:07:18,053
How about an Amish
guy at a barn raising?
166
00:07:18,078 --> 00:07:20,278
Any place where God is defiled.
167
00:07:21,417 --> 00:07:22,841
Hey, didn't you have sex at a funeral?
168
00:07:22,866 --> 00:07:24,800
I did, but it was at the cemetery.
169
00:07:25,068 --> 00:07:27,235
Thanks for remembering, though.
170
00:07:28,398 --> 00:07:29,730
You go, Bonnie.
171
00:07:29,755 --> 00:07:32,583
Oh, good luck finding
something you haven't done.
172
00:07:33,075 --> 00:07:36,503
Never have I ever eaten cat treats
173
00:07:36,528 --> 00:07:38,261
because I was curious.
174
00:07:40,034 --> 00:07:41,900
I knew it!
175
00:07:42,567 --> 00:07:45,154
- Tammy, go.
- No, no, I want to go again.
176
00:07:46,622 --> 00:07:48,148
Never have I ever
177
00:07:48,173 --> 00:07:50,318
killed something I was
supposed to be taking care of.
178
00:07:50,343 --> 00:07:52,231
I forgot to water your
ficus. Get over it.
179
00:07:52,256 --> 00:07:55,138
All 73 of your cats were
still alive, weren't they?
180
00:07:57,774 --> 00:07:59,574
What'd you kill, someone's buzz?
181
00:08:00,419 --> 00:08:03,724
- No. A man.
- TAMMY, BONNIE AND MARJORIE: What?
182
00:08:03,749 --> 00:08:05,916
Wait, did this just
segue into Murder Mystery?
183
00:08:05,941 --> 00:08:07,896
Because I did not authorize that.
184
00:08:08,538 --> 00:08:11,038
Last week, I had two patients in the ER
185
00:08:11,063 --> 00:08:12,662
and only one ICU bed.
186
00:08:12,966 --> 00:08:15,432
I advocated for one guy over the other,
187
00:08:15,457 --> 00:08:17,323
so the doctor took him first.
188
00:08:17,974 --> 00:08:19,502
By the time we found a bed,
189
00:08:19,527 --> 00:08:21,227
the other patient had died.
190
00:08:21,252 --> 00:08:23,683
Oh, sweetie, that's not your fault.
191
00:08:23,708 --> 00:08:25,475
You're a nurse. You have to prioritize
192
00:08:25,500 --> 00:08:27,266
based on who needs it more.
193
00:08:27,291 --> 00:08:28,810
But I'm not sure I did.
194
00:08:29,948 --> 00:08:32,182
The other guy was rude to me.
195
00:08:33,186 --> 00:08:35,646
I'm worried that I was playing God.
196
00:08:37,722 --> 00:08:40,325
No. You just have a really tough job.
197
00:08:40,659 --> 00:08:42,903
You didn't kill anybody. My dad,
198
00:08:42,928 --> 00:08:44,572
- on the other hand...
- New game. New game, Jill.
199
00:08:44,596 --> 00:08:46,796
Yeah. Okay. This one's my favorite.
200
00:08:46,821 --> 00:08:49,810
Tammy, you breathe really fast
until you get light-headed,
201
00:08:49,835 --> 00:08:51,946
and the rest of us will push
on your chest till you pass out.
202
00:08:51,970 --> 00:08:53,169
It's called Pass Out.
203
00:08:53,825 --> 00:08:55,238
As a medical professional,
204
00:08:55,263 --> 00:08:57,130
I am not sure I can allow this.
205
00:08:57,155 --> 00:08:59,555
As a sober person, I don't
think it's a good idea.
206
00:08:59,580 --> 00:09:02,155
Aw. I can't drink. I can't do drugs.
207
00:09:02,180 --> 00:09:04,714
Now I can't even have people
cut off my air supply for fun?
208
00:09:04,971 --> 00:09:06,255
Damn it.
209
00:09:08,849 --> 00:09:12,699
All right, ladies,
welcome to Sex Bucket.
210
00:09:13,749 --> 00:09:14,882
This contains the names
211
00:09:14,907 --> 00:09:16,770
of the men from our Wednesday meeting.
212
00:09:16,795 --> 00:09:18,849
When it is your turn,
you will pick two names
213
00:09:18,874 --> 00:09:20,411
and choose the one
you would sleep with.
214
00:09:20,436 --> 00:09:21,439
- Oh!
- Ah.
215
00:09:21,464 --> 00:09:23,021
- Birthday girl?
- Ooh, all right.
216
00:09:23,046 --> 00:09:25,145
Let's see.
217
00:09:25,170 --> 00:09:27,337
Vigorous Handshake Dave...
218
00:09:27,362 --> 00:09:29,162
versus
219
00:09:29,187 --> 00:09:30,519
Paul the Veteran.
220
00:09:30,544 --> 00:09:32,444
- Ooh.
- Ooh, that's tricky. Oh.
221
00:09:32,469 --> 00:09:34,344
I choose Paul. Don't love the beard,
222
00:09:34,369 --> 00:09:35,835
but thank you for your service.
223
00:09:37,349 --> 00:09:39,349
- Okay. My turn, my turn.
- Okay.
224
00:09:39,374 --> 00:09:40,973
All righty.
225
00:09:42,825 --> 00:09:46,227
- Angry Mark the Meditation Teacher...
- Uh-huh.
226
00:09:46,658 --> 00:09:48,124
Or Tight Jeans Tom.
227
00:09:48,149 --> 00:09:49,549
Hmm. Oh, I don't know.
228
00:09:49,728 --> 00:09:50,728
Just pick one.
229
00:09:50,795 --> 00:09:51,861
I prefer Tom,
230
00:09:51,886 --> 00:09:53,686
but there's a lot of self-adjusting.
231
00:09:53,786 --> 00:09:55,653
This isn't real.
232
00:09:55,678 --> 00:09:57,216
That doesn't mean it
couldn't lead to something.
233
00:09:57,241 --> 00:09:59,569
Okay, part of what makes
this game fun is pace.
234
00:09:59,594 --> 00:10:00,827
Marjorie, go.
235
00:10:00,852 --> 00:10:02,451
I don't want to play this game.
236
00:10:02,476 --> 00:10:04,651
If we as women want to be treated
237
00:10:04,676 --> 00:10:05,909
with respect and dignity,
238
00:10:05,934 --> 00:10:08,167
we shouldn't be sitting
here objectifying men.
239
00:10:08,192 --> 00:10:10,950
We're only objectifying the hot ones.
240
00:10:12,350 --> 00:10:14,779
Well done. You ruined Sex Bucket.
241
00:10:15,187 --> 00:10:17,020
Next game, Jill.
242
00:10:17,045 --> 00:10:18,311
All right. Truth or Dare.
243
00:10:18,336 --> 00:10:20,040
Love it! I'll go first. Dare.
244
00:10:20,791 --> 00:10:22,439
I have one.
245
00:10:27,465 --> 00:10:29,098
Hello.
246
00:10:29,540 --> 00:10:31,645
I would like to buy
one packet of condoms...
247
00:10:31,670 --> 00:10:33,436
Your smallest size...
248
00:10:33,461 --> 00:10:36,384
And every flavor of Slim Jim.
249
00:10:36,940 --> 00:10:39,681
And also, I would like to tell you this.
250
00:10:45,037 --> 00:10:49,329
♪ You make me feel ♪
251
00:10:49,354 --> 00:10:53,704
♪ You make me feel like ♪
252
00:10:53,737 --> 00:10:57,103
♪ A natural ♪
253
00:10:57,128 --> 00:10:58,962
♪ Woman ♪
254
00:10:58,987 --> 00:11:00,920
♪ Woman! ♪
255
00:11:03,131 --> 00:11:05,831
All right, ring it up.
Let's end this nightmare.
256
00:11:14,246 --> 00:11:16,613
All right, you can take it off now.
257
00:11:18,567 --> 00:11:20,423
Oh, God.
258
00:11:20,448 --> 00:11:22,452
- Is that your dad?
- No, it's this guy
259
00:11:22,477 --> 00:11:25,384
who works at Home Depot...
He likes to talk dirty to me.
260
00:11:25,624 --> 00:11:27,790
Hey, Steve. I got to call you back.
261
00:11:28,501 --> 00:11:30,467
No, you're a whore. Gotta go.
262
00:11:33,108 --> 00:11:35,942
Okay, Jill, your turn. Truth or dare?
263
00:11:35,967 --> 00:11:37,517
Um, truth, please.
264
00:11:37,667 --> 00:11:40,268
How many times a week
do you and Andy have sex?
265
00:11:41,790 --> 00:11:43,250
12 to 15.
266
00:11:43,275 --> 00:11:45,174
- Oh, my God! Seriously?
- You lie!
267
00:11:45,199 --> 00:11:47,493
I don't even have sex 12 times a year.
268
00:11:49,420 --> 00:11:51,665
You could at least
pretend to be surprised.
269
00:11:52,984 --> 00:11:54,931
Wait. Don't you get bored?
270
00:11:54,956 --> 00:11:58,064
Nah. We mix it up with
toys and role play.
271
00:11:58,089 --> 00:12:01,157
My favorite is "upscale
Realtor at a very open house."
272
00:12:01,182 --> 00:12:02,515
Mmm.
273
00:12:02,771 --> 00:12:04,337
My mom was a Realtor.
274
00:12:04,362 --> 00:12:06,829
She used to let me stick
the signs in the lawn.
275
00:12:06,970 --> 00:12:09,175
I'd forgotten about that.
276
00:12:09,407 --> 00:12:10,777
Nice work, Jill.
277
00:12:11,293 --> 00:12:13,853
How was I supposed to know?
278
00:12:14,509 --> 00:12:16,509
Pillow fight!
279
00:12:21,990 --> 00:12:23,723
Whoa!
280
00:12:23,748 --> 00:12:25,748
Whoa. Whoa.
281
00:12:36,087 --> 00:12:37,637
What's wrong with you?
282
00:12:37,662 --> 00:12:40,596
What do you mean? She was whaling on me!
283
00:12:40,621 --> 00:12:42,439
Yeah, but you really crossed a line.
284
00:12:42,464 --> 00:12:45,301
We don't hit our
elders. They're brittle.
285
00:12:45,326 --> 00:12:47,627
You know what? Screw you guys.
286
00:12:57,946 --> 00:13:00,026
Don't worry, it's not a slumber party
287
00:13:00,051 --> 00:13:01,798
till somebody cries.
288
00:13:07,250 --> 00:13:09,436
Well, this party just went off a cliff.
289
00:13:09,461 --> 00:13:10,646
No, it's okay.
290
00:13:10,671 --> 00:13:12,829
This is the part where we pick sides.
291
00:13:12,913 --> 00:13:15,404
We're not 12. We're not picking sides.
292
00:13:15,437 --> 00:13:17,103
I'm gonna go check on Bonnie.
293
00:13:17,128 --> 00:13:18,858
I'll check on Marjorie.
294
00:13:20,137 --> 00:13:22,663
Well, we just picked sides, but okay.
295
00:13:25,093 --> 00:13:28,750
Bonnie makes me angry
in a way no one else can.
296
00:13:28,775 --> 00:13:31,009
Maybe I hit her too
hard with the pillow,
297
00:13:31,034 --> 00:13:33,601
but a woman can only take so much.
298
00:13:34,359 --> 00:13:37,413
Marjorie, it isn't safe
to eat raw cookie dough.
299
00:13:38,460 --> 00:13:39,812
Seriously?
300
00:13:40,376 --> 00:13:42,276
You're worried about cookie dough?
301
00:13:42,479 --> 00:13:45,080
I used to huff bug spray.
302
00:13:46,504 --> 00:13:48,203
I'm sorry that tonight got messed up.
303
00:13:48,228 --> 00:13:50,194
I just wanted to keep
your mind off your dad.
304
00:13:50,219 --> 00:13:52,185
It did. A little.
305
00:13:52,732 --> 00:13:54,032
Not at all.
306
00:13:54,057 --> 00:13:55,590
But I appreciate it.
307
00:13:55,846 --> 00:13:57,929
I honestly don't know what
I'm gonna do if he calls.
308
00:13:57,954 --> 00:13:59,944
Well, whatever you decide,
I got your back.
309
00:13:59,969 --> 00:14:02,398
- And I got yours.
- Good. 'Cause what do you want to bet
310
00:14:02,423 --> 00:14:04,890
Marjorie's out there talking
smack about me right now?
311
00:14:04,915 --> 00:14:06,281
No, she's not.
312
00:14:06,306 --> 00:14:08,040
Yes, she is.
313
00:14:08,582 --> 00:14:10,482
Sorry, I've been spying on both sides.
314
00:14:10,507 --> 00:14:11,920
- Well, come on in.
- Okay.
315
00:14:11,945 --> 00:14:15,313
This is really turning out to be a
great slumber party. I was worried
316
00:14:15,337 --> 00:14:17,810
without wine coolers and boys
sneaking in, it was gonna suck.
317
00:14:17,835 --> 00:14:19,435
Well, I'm beginning
to think that getting
318
00:14:19,460 --> 00:14:21,420
a bunch of alcoholics
together to act like teenagers
319
00:14:21,445 --> 00:14:22,578
was a bad idea.
320
00:14:22,603 --> 00:14:23,748
So what now?
321
00:14:23,943 --> 00:14:25,381
Well, Bonnie's got to go out there
322
00:14:25,406 --> 00:14:26,516
and beg for Marjorie's forgiveness,
323
00:14:26,541 --> 00:14:27,981
and then when Marjorie goes to sleep,
324
00:14:28,006 --> 00:14:30,935
we have to put her hand in
hot water so she pees herself.
325
00:14:31,697 --> 00:14:33,697
Your call, big sauce.
326
00:14:33,722 --> 00:14:35,560
Well, that's pretty immature.
327
00:14:35,585 --> 00:14:37,184
- I love it.
- Aah!
328
00:14:38,722 --> 00:14:40,555
Oops. I'm sorry.
329
00:14:41,365 --> 00:14:44,615
- What's going on?
- I'm calling an Uber and going home.
330
00:14:44,640 --> 00:14:46,099
Pissed off and leaving early?
331
00:14:46,124 --> 00:14:47,802
For women who have never
been to a slumber party,
332
00:14:47,827 --> 00:14:49,360
you're sure checking all the boxes.
333
00:14:49,737 --> 00:14:50,888
Oh, come on.
334
00:14:50,913 --> 00:14:53,052
Can't we just let this
go and have some fun?
335
00:14:53,979 --> 00:14:55,579
How about you dare
me to go to Jiffy Lube
336
00:14:55,604 --> 00:14:57,084
and say I didn't know it was for cars?
337
00:14:58,154 --> 00:15:00,598
Tammy, I'll bake you a cake tomorrow
338
00:15:00,623 --> 00:15:02,190
and we'll celebrate.
339
00:15:04,301 --> 00:15:06,326
Actually, I think I'm gonna go, too.
340
00:15:06,351 --> 00:15:08,123
Maybe we should just call it a night.
341
00:15:08,154 --> 00:15:11,222
We haven't even talked anybody
into cutting their hair yet.
342
00:15:11,247 --> 00:15:12,847
Nobody is going anywhere.
343
00:15:14,685 --> 00:15:16,771
Hey! I don't want to hear it, Bonnie.
344
00:15:16,796 --> 00:15:17,916
What is wrong with you?
345
00:15:17,941 --> 00:15:19,741
Why are you being
such a grouchy, grumpy,
346
00:15:19,766 --> 00:15:22,300
grocery-store-cake-buying sourpuss?
347
00:15:23,380 --> 00:15:24,824
My doctor told me
348
00:15:24,849 --> 00:15:26,704
that I have something
wrong with my heart.
349
00:15:26,729 --> 00:15:27,982
I love you so much.
350
00:15:28,007 --> 00:15:30,074
You have to live forever.
351
00:15:33,490 --> 00:15:36,234
Put your meat sticks down.
Marjorie needs a heart transplant.
352
00:15:36,638 --> 00:15:39,694
No. It's nothing like that.
353
00:15:39,881 --> 00:15:42,982
I need a stent
put in my existing heart.
354
00:15:43,007 --> 00:15:45,340
- Oh, my God.
- That's so awful.
355
00:15:45,730 --> 00:15:48,665
But still, that was no excuse
for hitting you like that.
356
00:15:48,690 --> 00:15:50,423
Bonnie, I'm sorry.
357
00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:53,336
I guess I just didn't
realize how afraid I am.
358
00:15:53,361 --> 00:15:55,006
I forgive you. And I
won't make you pee yourself
359
00:15:55,030 --> 00:15:56,030
when you fall asleep.
360
00:15:56,055 --> 00:15:57,755
- What?
- What?
361
00:15:58,747 --> 00:16:00,247
Why didn't you tell us?
362
00:16:00,272 --> 00:16:02,512
'Cause it's Tammy's birthday...
I didn't want to ruin it.
363
00:16:02,537 --> 00:16:04,099
Honestly, there's no ruining it.
364
00:16:04,124 --> 00:16:06,357
I've been freaked out
myself all night long.
365
00:16:06,382 --> 00:16:09,308
Every time my phone makes
a noise, my heart stops.
366
00:16:09,419 --> 00:16:10,885
Sorry, Marjorie.
367
00:16:12,240 --> 00:16:13,240
New game.
368
00:16:13,292 --> 00:16:15,373
It's okay, Jill... That ship has sailed.
369
00:16:15,398 --> 00:16:16,931
Nope. This one's called Fear Bucket.
370
00:16:16,956 --> 00:16:18,456
I just made it up.
371
00:16:19,998 --> 00:16:21,965
Ah. These were for Pictionary,
but I'm gonna pivot.
372
00:16:22,302 --> 00:16:23,923
Write down your deepest fears,
373
00:16:23,948 --> 00:16:26,749
and we are gonna set 'em on
fire so they lose their power.
374
00:16:27,106 --> 00:16:29,005
Be honest.
375
00:16:29,471 --> 00:16:31,772
And they can't all be: "I'm
afraid Marjorie's gonna die."
376
00:16:38,209 --> 00:16:40,807
"I'm afraid of making a mistake at work
377
00:16:40,832 --> 00:16:42,498
and hurting someone."
378
00:16:44,662 --> 00:16:45,688
"I'm afraid
379
00:16:45,713 --> 00:16:48,181
"if I don't take my dad's
call, I'm gonna regret it,
380
00:16:48,206 --> 00:16:50,439
"and I'm afraid if I answer the call,
381
00:16:50,696 --> 00:16:52,568
I'll be betraying my mother."
382
00:16:54,586 --> 00:16:56,900
"I'm afraid Andy and I
are having so much sex
383
00:16:56,925 --> 00:16:59,857
because we have nothing to talk about."
384
00:17:01,146 --> 00:17:03,563
"I'm afraid I'm not going to get to see
385
00:17:03,588 --> 00:17:05,087
my granddaughter grow up."
386
00:17:07,721 --> 00:17:09,454
"I'm afraid of spiders."
387
00:17:12,584 --> 00:17:13,950
"I'm afraid the people in this group
388
00:17:13,975 --> 00:17:15,808
don't know how much I love them."
389
00:17:15,833 --> 00:17:16,999
Aw...
390
00:17:17,024 --> 00:17:18,891
Shut up. I meant to write spiders.
391
00:17:20,170 --> 00:17:22,692
Is it just me, or is this the
best game we've played all night?
392
00:17:22,717 --> 00:17:24,484
- I loved it.
- Absolutely. - Absolutely.
393
00:17:24,601 --> 00:17:27,068
We should put some
hot dogs on them fears.
394
00:17:32,435 --> 00:17:34,735
It's him. I still don't know what to do.
395
00:17:34,760 --> 00:17:35,559
Got your back.
396
00:17:37,884 --> 00:17:39,017
Hello?
397
00:17:39,502 --> 00:17:41,185
Yes, I'll accept the call.
398
00:17:42,959 --> 00:17:44,492
Yeah. Hi.
399
00:17:45,138 --> 00:17:47,117
Well, I wasn't gonna,
400
00:17:47,142 --> 00:17:48,670
but here I am.
401
00:17:49,144 --> 00:17:50,545
So...
402
00:17:51,008 --> 00:17:52,614
what's new with you?
403
00:17:54,459 --> 00:17:56,593
Really? I'm sober, too.
404
00:17:57,341 --> 00:17:59,585
Yeah, almost three years, yeah.
405
00:17:59,610 --> 00:18:01,951
Wow, that's a long time.
406
00:18:02,706 --> 00:18:04,076
Good for you.
407
00:18:05,770 --> 00:18:07,263
Look, um...
408
00:18:07,982 --> 00:18:10,966
I'm with my friends, so I can't
really talk right now, but...
409
00:18:12,404 --> 00:18:15,084
Thank you for
remembering my birthday.
410
00:18:15,752 --> 00:18:17,485
Okay, bye.
411
00:18:29,313 --> 00:18:32,321
My back is gonna
hate me in the morning.
412
00:18:32,346 --> 00:18:34,680
My left ass cheek is totally numb.
413
00:18:34,889 --> 00:18:37,530
We may be too old to sleep on the floor.
414
00:18:37,555 --> 00:18:39,522
Why does Marjorie get the couch?
415
00:18:39,547 --> 00:18:41,480
Because she's dying.
416
00:18:42,985 --> 00:18:46,606
I'm not dying and I'm not deaf.
417
00:18:46,708 --> 00:18:48,808
Although lately I've been having trouble
418
00:18:48,833 --> 00:18:50,571
in noisy restaurants.
419
00:18:51,791 --> 00:18:53,613
Guys, it's almost 4:00 a.m.
420
00:18:53,638 --> 00:18:55,204
We've got to go to sleep.
421
00:18:55,383 --> 00:18:58,384
Jill's right. We're gonna
be so cranky in the morning.
422
00:18:58,409 --> 00:19:01,110
Thanks for the best
birthday ever, you guys.
423
00:19:01,212 --> 00:19:02,578
Good night.
424
00:19:02,603 --> 00:19:04,203
- Good night.
- Good night.
425
00:19:04,228 --> 00:19:06,261
- Good night. - Night.
- Good night.
426
00:19:10,292 --> 00:19:12,008
Unbelievable.
427
00:19:13,458 --> 00:19:14,957
Hi, Christy.
428
00:19:15,136 --> 00:19:17,003
No. I'm up.
429
00:19:17,028 --> 00:19:18,327
How's it going, honey?
430
00:19:18,352 --> 00:19:21,985
- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
-- for www.addic7ed.com --
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