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Noise?
This happens to be 60s music. The greatest dance music of all time.
We had the pony.
We had the mashed potatoes.
And the granddaddy of them all, the twist.
That was invented by that guy, Chubby Domino.
Chubby Checker.
Watch, I'll show you. It's all in the hip.
See, it's like drying yourself with a towel.
Come on. Come on. Just do everything that I do.
This is fun.
Now watch this tricky move.
It's a rare condition this day and age to read any good news on the newspaper
page. And love and tradition of the grand design, some people say, is even
harder to find.
Well, then there must be some magic clue inside these gentle walls.
Because all I see is a tower of dreams.
gonna believe what happened today.
I still don't believe it. It is just unbelievable.
Well, tell us and we won't believe it either.
Bert is gone.
The best partner I ever had just up and quit the force.
Why? He wanted to pursue his dream.
He's opening up a donut shop?
No. He moved to Hollywood to write that screenplay he always talked about.
Sounds like Bert.
Hey. I'm happy for him.
But meanwhile, while he's out in sunny California breaking into show business,
I'm stuck here breaking into a new partner.
Well, Carl, I'm sure you'll like your new partner once you get to know him.
Well, that's the problem.
It's not a him, it's a her.
Oh, that's terrific.
A policewoman?
Just like Mom was.
That's cool, Dad.
Well, it sounds great in theory, but when I'm out there with my life on the
line, I want a man to back me up, not some woman I feel I'd have to protect.
Yeah.
thing you know they'll want to play football what
makes you think a woman cop can't protect herself
or you well they're a lot smaller for one thing
Chauvinist? I thought we were Baptists.
Rachel, can you get me the furniture polish, please? Sure, just as soon as I
finish this chapter.
Love's Burning Fury.
Rachel, not another trashy romance novel.
Honey, when you ain't got it, you read about it.
Can I borrow it when you're through?
Good evening, ladies.
How you doing? Hi, baby.
How's your new partner?
Not bad, not bad at all.
Our first call is on a liquor store holdup.
Vanessa tackles the guy and holds him down while I cuff him.
So women cops are okay, huh?
Well, I have to admit, I think she's gonna work out just fine.
Honey, where's my bowling shirt?
Oh, it's hanging in the laundry room.
Not only is Vanessa a good cop, but she's a weightlifter, and she bowls.
Just like one of the guys.
Oh, yeah, and she's taking first place on the bowling team. She'll be here to
pick me up in a few minutes.
Boy, Carstew has changed his mind about Vanessa.
Yeah, she sounds like RoboCop.
I'm Vanessa Greer, Carl's new partner.
This is the Winslow house, isn't it?
Yes, yes.
Come on in.
I'm Harriet. Oh, of course. Happy to meet you. Yeah, Carl talked about you
day. Oh, this is my sister Rachel and Carl's mother.
Wow.
Vanessa, right on time. I love a prompt partner.
Did you meet everybody?
Oh, yeah, we met.
Well, let's go.
Yeah.
Gorgeous. Plenty of upper body strength.
time to clean up.
But I'm trying to cut down. I just have a little coffee. No cream, no sugar.
What you all spiffed up for?
Nothing, Mama. Just a routine stakeout. Sitting in a car for 12 hours drinking
cold coffee.
When you used to go on stakeouts with Bert, you always wore your Gumby T
and old blue jeans.
Well, Vanessa has made me realize that a police officer should always look his
or her best.
Well, I'm sure Vanessa always looked... Her or his best.
Yeah, and she's such good company, too. We have so much in common.
Like what?
Well, we're both into physical fitness.
Do the other cops like her, too? Oh, they love her. She's a great asset to
force. Oh, we noticed her assets the minute she walked in.
Now, Rachel, that was a sexist remark.
Now, just because a woman happens to be good -looking...
does not mean that she can't be an outstanding police officer.
So, you notice she's good -looking.
But, Mama, I'm a police officer.
We're trained to notice everything.
Quit it, you two.
I'm happy that Carl has such a good working relationship with his partner.
Oh, thank you, honey.
Vanessa and I are just two cops doing our job. When I look at her, all I see
a uniform.
The way I feel about Vanessa is strictly professional.
Do these pinstripes make me look thinner?
Yeah, I can hardly see you.
that gorgeous younger woman.
No reason for you to worry.
I'm not worried. Of course not. Why should you be?
I mean, for any normal man, this would be an incredible temptation.
Fortunately, we're talking about Carl.
Thank goodness there were no cops like Vanessa when my Sam was on the force.
Mother Winslow, I trust Carl.
Sure you do, sugar.
I trusted my Sam. He was a good man.
Carl's a good man.
But we don't know anything about Vanessa.
She may be a sex -crazed vixen.
He said he's staring at the TV. It's off.
I turned it off for his own good.
He was watching another Paula Abdu video.
Yeah, that girl can really move.
I remember when I could move like her.
Now I just read.
has such exotic tastes.
She doesn't. That's mine.
So, Carl not home yet?
He's still on that steak app.
Out all night, five nights in a row?
Four nights and he's working.
Of course he is.
Don't worry about a thing.
I'm not worried.
Carl doesn't need to go out looking for love. He gets plenty at home.
We all know how much Carl loves you.
But putting any man next to Vanessa is like putting a kid in a candy shop.
And we know how much Carl loves candy.
Okay, that's it.
Enough is enough. I trust Carl. He's out working, not out with some bimbo in a
sleazy motel.
Looks like a key.
Looks like a motel key.
Room three.
Louie's love grotto.
Uh -huh.
Louie's love grotto?
There's got to be some reasonable explanation for Carl having this kid.
there is.
Maybe they're not his parents.
There's a Twinkie in the pocket.
Oh, Harriet, they're supposed to be staked out in a car, not a motel.
A car, a motel, what's the difference?
A vibrating bed.
Look, Carl's a good husband.
He's never given me any reason to doubt him.
And even if he is at Louie's Love Grotto with Vanessa, I'm sure there's nothing
going on.
Ask about our hourly rates.
I'm going down there to prove it.
Jen. What?
Not again.
Well, maybe Jen isn't your game. How about a little go fish?
Great.
Carl, I want you to know something.
I wasn't thrilled with the idea of having a male partner.
Because I'm always getting hassled or hit on.
But with you, I feel comfortable.
Phil says your microphone keeps cutting in and out.
Phil, can you hear me?
Phil, are you in there?
Must have come loose.
Here, better take a look.
Let's go over the plan.
We get the diamonds, I check them out, and then I give the signal.
They look real to me.
Okay,
Phil. Just make sure when you hear the signal, you come in here fast.
Okay. Phil says we're coming in loud and clear.
Okay, see you.
Do me a favor.
Loop this through so I'll stay clear.
Oh, sure.
I've given you all my love and trust, and this is how you repay me? By
off to Louie's Love Grotto with this... this cheap floozy?
Cheap floozy?
Who you calling cheap?
Wait a minute.
Harriet, we are on stakeout just like I told you.
Oh, I guess you just forgot to mention the motel part.
Well, we were on stakeout. That was phase one. This is phase two.
What's phase three?
I think that's the part we came in on.
got stuck fixing Vanessa's microphone.
She is wired to tape the buy.
Look.
Here's the money we're going to use to buy the stolen jewelry.
Some very bad guys are going to be here in any minute.
Oops.
Boy, Harriet, when you are wrong, you are really wrong.
I don't care whose fault it is. You two are in danger, and I want you out of
here now.
Stay here.
Get in the bathroom and don't make a...
lost your mind.
Harry's on her way down here now.
When I think of that poor trusting woman and your three innocent children.
Oh, are your kids coming too?
Homewrecker!
Mother Winslow!
Rick! Rachel!
You should see the size of that hot tub. You could fit a whole football team in
there.
Ooh.
Carl Winslow, you go straight home.
You are grounded.
the rest of your life.
Mama, Vanessa and I are in the middle of a stay.
Now, would you all please just leave right now? I want you out of here right
now. And, uh, don't, don't, don't, and don't come back until you bring me all
the money you owe me. I don't care how you get it.
Nobody's going anywhere.
Uh, hey, baby.
It's Jake in high top.
Right on time.
Hey, big man.
Nice suit.
Pinstripes make you look thinner.
Honey, I'm his mama. That's cool, baby.
Who is this?
You are a fine -looking lady.
I work out.
Me, too.
Well, my girls were just leaving.
Nobody's leaving.
Or we could just...
You got the cash, we got the stash.
Wow, what did you guys do? Rob a jewelry store? Rachel, get over here.
Ooh, this is fresh.
There's some beautiful merchandise.
Yeah.
Where'd you get them?
Lakeshore Drive, baby.
Nothing but the best.
So we got a deal?
Oh, yeah.
to me.
The one that Mama flipped is claiming police brutality.
Carl, listen. I can't tell you how sorry I am.
I mean, I feel terrible that I doubted you.
Well, to tell you the truth, I'm kind of flattered.
I mean, for you to be jealous after all these years kind of does something good
to the old ego.
Oh, I really am sorry.
I mean, I was fine until I saw the key.
And then I lost it.
Harriet, don't you know that you are the only woman in the world for me?
I love you. I love you, too.
I just wish there was something I could do to make it up to you.
Ah, well, there's always Louie's Love Grotto.
We have to ruin till tomorrow noon.
I'll race you to the hot tub.
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