Original subtitles

Now the world don't move to the beat of just one drum. What might be right for

you may not be right for some. A man is born.

He's a man of means.

Then along come two.

They got nothing but the genes.

But they got different strokes to take. Different strokes to take. Different

strokes to move the world.

that you got.

watching other people swim.

I had a grandma like that. She can bop me in her knee anytime.

I know it hurts, but it's worth it. Just remember I'm a toast.

It's only one of you, and it's a mess.

Oh, man, that woman's got a mean streak.

She's a cross between Jane Fonda and Attila the Hun.

Who is she?

Her name's Maggie McKinney. She's terrific.

All my friends watch her.

Well, she has a terrific sense of humor.

Well, I've got a terrific sense of pain.

It's hard work, but it's fun. Maggie ought to write a book and make an album

like the others do.

Yeah, then you and I could pose for the cover before and after.

You know something?

You may have something there, Kimberly.

Exercise is big business today.

In fact, our director of projects suggested that we get into it.

Let's go.

before somebody else does.

I just may do that.

Excuse me.

Yeah. Where would I find Miss McKinney?

Oh, she'll be back in a little while.

Hi, Daisy, her assistant.

Is there something I can do for you?

Uh... Well, there's a business matter that I need to discuss with Miss

Incidentally, I saw your show this morning.

I thought it was very good.

Well, thank you.

Are you in the exercise business, too?

You don't look it.

No, I'm sort of the lean and wiry type.

However, I... However, I might be interested in

investing in a business like this.

I think your little local television show has really great potential.

You could be a hit in homes all over America.

Hi!

Guess what?

This gentleman here is going to make me a star.

You don't say.

That's not quite the way I put it, Miss McKinney. How exactly did you put it,

Mr., uh... Drummond. Uh, Philip Drummond.

I don't have much time, Mr. Drummond. I have a class in a few minutes.

Oh.

Well, there is a business proposition that I'd like to discuss with you. I

I can turn your business into a national franchise.

Like Richard Simmons or Jack LaLanne? Do tell.

Well, I'm a financier with a pretty good track record, although I don't like to

blow my own horn.

You just gave me a pretty good toot.

Well, I don't like to sound immodest, but I think that your show is really

something special. You could go a long way.

And frankly, I'm in a position to make that happen.

Oh, really?

You know, I have the feeling that you don't believe me.

Go with your feelings.

I'm tired of men coming over here and making advances to me and my girls.

We get a dozen of these phony propositions a week.

Well, this proposition happens to be legitimate.

And I resent being treated like an oversexed tycoon.

I never said you were a tycoon.

Now, if you'll excuse me. Wait a minute.

I'm not through. Yes, you are.

Rodney!

Oh!

Would you be so kind as to show this gentleman to the door?

You got it.

You've had it.

Now hold it.

I warn you, I'm easily aroused.

Look, pal, you can do this the easy way or my way.

Take me to the door.

I can't believe she non -tucked me in the nuts. BET presents an all -new

show where the women think they're calling the shot. But in reality... One

gets the boot, and the other girl gets the mane. It premieres May 19th at 7

Russia is in the air. Russia's in the air.

I know I'm a little biased, but this is great.

Hi, how's the fragrance going?

Want to try it?

Wow, that's terrific.

It took me forever to design this bottle. Oh, I was in research for months

before I got everything just perfect.

Okay, I worked on two fragrances.

Now, how many things did you make?

2 ,000 or so.

Honestly, girl, when do you sleep?

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Good evening.

Is this a drumming resident?

Yes, it is.

Say, you're Maggie McKinney, that lady on television.

That's right.

I'm Pearl, the housekeeper. One of your biggest fans.

Is Mr. Drummond in?

Please come in, Miss McKinney. Thank you, Pearl. Just call me Maggie.

does. Oh, thanks, Maggie.

Oh, I'll get Mr. Drummond for you. Please sit down. This is Arnold, his

Hi. His son?

Yeah, I'm going to trip off a different block.

I see you on TV all the time yelling at people.

Were you in the Marines?

No.

But you gotta be tough to win the battle of the blubber. Uh, you here to de

-blub my father?

No.

No, I just dropped by to talk a little business.

Oh, well, in that case, you can talk to me until he gets here.

I'm in line to take over his company.

Well, how about that? You ought to go on Dynasty.

Laugh if you will, but just remember I have the three things for success.

Brains, ambition, and a rich father.

Arnold, you are getting crumbs all over.

Is this really the place to be eating?

Any place is the place to be eating.

Once I ate a whole chicken in the closet.

Admirable. Mm.

So tell me, will my father include a lot for you cooking the food?

I didn't quite understand what you just said. Do you always talk with your mouth

full? Only when I'm eating.

I bet your daddy's told you that's not very polite.

No, he talks with his mouth full, too.

Is there anything... else I ought to know about your father?

No, he's just your average millionaire next door.

Speak of the rich devil.

Hello, Miss McKinney.

How do you do, Mr. Drummond? I hope you don't mind my dropping by unannounced,

but I had to talk to you.

Very well.

Arnold, I'm sure you have something to do.

Nope.

Well, then make up something.

Oh, Dad.

and your company, I ought to be in on this discussion.

If I leave, it could affect my whole future.

If you stay, it could affect your whole behind.

Got the picture.

And by the way, how many times have I told you that I don't like eating in the

living room?

Oh, I thought you meant you, not me.

Now then, what can I do for you, Miss McKinney?

Mr. Drummond, I'd like to apologize for what happened this afternoon.

All right, go right ahead.

I think I just did.

Really? It went by so fast.

Well, after you left, I got curious and decided to do some checking.

According to Mr. Dunn and Mr.

Bradstreet, you are a very reputable businessman.

Oh, you don't believe those guys, do you?

Now, I'm admitting I made a mistake, so don't you rub my little nose in it.

If you still would like to back me, there is nothing I like better.

As a matter of fact, Miss McKinney, I've had second thoughts since I saw you

last. Oh.

Well, I can understand that, Mr. Drummond, but you ought to consider...

not at all sure that the exercise business is the kind of investment our

should make.

I'm going to have to think about that.

Well, I didn't come here to beg.

But we can talk about it. Good.

Now then, let's get down to business.

Well, I'll do my best, but I'm afraid business matters were always taken care

by my late departed husband.

Oh, I'm sorry.

He's not dead. He just got up late one night and departed.

All right, then why don't I just have my lawyer draw up a basic proposal, and

then you and I can take it from there. Fine. But just so there's no

misunderstanding, this is a 50 -50 deal, right?

Well, almost.

$49 .51.

Oh, thank you. But I insist you get as much as I do.

No, I mean I always maintain a controlling interest.

Yeah.

I respect that proposal.

And I like to make a counter -proposal.

Is that the way you negotiate?

I'm putting up the money, you know.

And I'm putting up my good name and the talent and the sweat.

All right.

That's my offer.

Take it or leave it.

I'm going to leave it.

Bye.

All right.

50 -50.

Now we're getting someplace.

Just have your lawyer call my lawyer. I don't have a lawyer. I would deal with

you personally. But if your lawyer is lonely, he can call my dentist.

Fine. And in that regard, I do hope we can keep this partnership strictly

business. I wouldn't want you to get any ideas about turning me into a personal

holding company.

Not to worry. To me, you're just a dollar sign in leotards.

And to me, you're just a blonde, blue -eyed money belt.

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Write it down, because you've got enough to worry about.

Now, the part about franchises here... Here's your coffee, folks.

I hope you like decaf, Miss McKinney. That's fine, Pearl.

It's supposed to be a lot healthier for you than regular coffees.

Although, if one thing doesn't kill you, something else will.

You're lucky to be alive from one minute to the next.

Well, have a nice evening.

Oh, thank you.

You got us off to a great start.

That's okay.

Maggie, are you sure you wouldn't rather have a cocktail or a glass of sherry?

Oh, no, thank you. I have to keep a clear head while we're talking high

You're so cute. You're liable to slip something by me.

You know something?

It's almost time for dinner.

I know a marvelous little restaurant in the village. Would you like to join me?

Oh, you're a darling to ask me that. I got to get back to the studio.

I got a zillion things to do there.

Oh, well, maybe some other time.

I'll be talking to you real soon here.

Bye.

Bye.

Well, Dad, we're off to our party.

Yeah, we'll see you later.

Have a good time.

Where's Maggie? I thought you were taking her out to dinner after your

meeting. Oh, no.

She had something else she wanted to do.

Boy, what's Dad so down about?

I think he's hung up on Maggie.

Yeah. He looks like a guy who hit a pothole on the highway of love.

Hey, Arnold, why don't you try and get Dad to tell you what's going on? But

don't look too obvious.

Are you asking me to trick my own father into spilling his gut?

Well, no problem.

Thank you.

Why don't you come over here and sit down? As long as you're staying home,

don't we rap a little?

All right, Arnold.

What would you like to rap about?

Well... Are you happy with my progress in school?

Oh, yes, very much.

Good. What's happening with you and Maggie?

Arnold, I appreciate your concern, but I don't want to burden you with my

problems. Oh, but I might... be able to give you some advice, Dad. I don't want

you to make the same mistakes I've made with women.

Well, I try to let her know how I feel, but she just doesn't respond.

Well, who does that woman think she is, treating you like dirt?

You're a real catch.

You're rich, you're eligible, and you've still got a little life left in you.

Hey, with a pacemaker, I could get through to Thursday.

Maggie's a very special woman, and maybe if I hang in there, she'll feel

differently about me someday.

Well, if she doesn't, you've always got me.

Thank you.

That's a great help.

I know how you feel about that woman.

I'm no stranger to heartache.

Hi.

Well, hi there.

Can I help you? Is Miss Bettina around?

She's in her office.

I think so, ma 'am. You have a very nice figure.

Thank you.

Uh, is that from exercise, or did you come from the factory that way?

It's from exercise. I worked hard for this figure.

You look like you put in a lot of overtime.

Daisy, would you? Well, look who's here.

Hi, Arnold.

Hi. Daisy, would you finish this roster for the morning class?

Oh, sure.

So long, cute stuff.

So long, tall stuff.

Well, what brings you here, Arnold?

You want to pump some iron for those puny pecs?

I'm in no mood for jokes, Miss McKinney.

I've got to talk to you about something serious.

Oh, okay, of course. Well, do you mind if I warm up while we're talking? I have

a class in a few minutes. No, go right ahead.

Uh, well, you see, I really hate to say this because, see, I was brought up to

respect my elders, and...

Well, you're a hard -hearted woman.

Hard -hearted?

Arnold, I'm a softie. I read my Cabbage Patch Doll to sleep every night.

Yeah, but I've seen how you've turned my dad into a blubbering blob.

Are you saying that I'm breaking your father's heart?

Breaking it, shredding it, crushing it.

You're destroying a major organ.

I had no idea your father felt that way about me.

The most affection he's ever shown me was taking me out for a sandwich and

blowing the head off my beard.

Well, now that you know, put the poor devil out of his misery.

I know just what to do.

Arnold, I promise you, I will put an end to his suffering.

Good. Tell him there's no hope, even if he was the last man on earth.

Tell him if he was Adam and you were Eve, you wouldn't let him near your

I'll do that.

Oh, by the way, I didn't appreciate that crack about my puny pecs. I may look

soft on the outside, but I've got a hard center.

Dad, could you get that?

Mr. T's about to start a fire by roving two crooks together.

I wouldn't want you to be interrupted while you're reading the classics.

Hi, Phil.

Maggie, what a nice surprise. Please come in. Thank you.

I just signed our contract, and since I was passing by, I thought you might like

to have it.

Oh, indeed I would.

Let me take your coat.

Hi, Arnold.

Hi. Death in the afternoon?

Believe me, he won't know what hit him.

Well, excuse me while I go ask Pearl if I could help with the dishes.

What dishes? We haven't even had dinner yet.

That's why it's a good time to ask her.

Strange kid.

Please sit down, Maggie.

May I get your glass of wine? Wine would be nice.

Arnold, you shouldn't be eavesdropping.

Pearl, this is important.

What are you watching?

A Murphy killing.

The contract includes all your lawyer's changes on my lawyer's changes of your

lawyer's changes of my lawyer's first changes.

Now, wait a minute. I thought you didn't have a lawyer.

Honey, I figured I'd better get one. I am naive, but I'm not crazy.

I can see that.

All right, let's see.

That's right.

Good. That's right.

Well, that does it.

We are now officially in business.

Shake.

Wow, that's quite a handshake.

I learned it in the Girl Scouts. That's how I sold so many cookies.

I thought you wanted our relationship to be strictly business.

I like to renegotiate.

I want a contract with more options and fringe benefits.

Boy, you sure drive a hard bargain.

Do you accept my terms?

I'll force myself.

Boy, she sure is letting him down easy.

What a way to go.

I'm not complaining, Maggie, but what brought this on all of a sudden?

Oh, it's not all of a sudden. I've been dying to break my strictly business

rule, but I didn't think you were interested.

Not interested?

I thought I'd sent out enough signals. You call those signals?

You're going to have to recharge your battery.

You just did that.

I never would have known you cared if it hadn't been for Arnold.

He came to see me this afternoon.

What? Don't be mad at him. Mad at him? I want to double his allowance.

Let's celebrate.

I have a better idea.

Why don't we have dinner at that little restaurant in the village?

Great. Hey, wait a minute.

Where are you going?

I want to run home and slip into something real fetching. You toss it,

fetch it.

Easy, that's your partner.

You too, partner.

Yahoo!

Who is it, Dad?

Arnold, I am happier than I've ever been in my life before, and I owe it all to

you. Thank you, son.

That's okay.

Thank you for doubling my allowance.

How do you know about that?

Oh, just a wild guess.

You were eavesdropping.

Only because I love you and I didn't want to see you get hurt.

I'll buy that.

I'll buy anything today.

I'm in love.

Man,

what a day.

Two tune -ups, overhaul the engine. Spent two hours working on this zipper.

Took a chunk of my chest down, man.

Well, you better be glad I caught you up there.

Oh, that's why I buy butt and fly.

Well, I hear you, man. It may take longer, but it's worth the peace of

Was that you or the couch?

No, I'm a gentleman, man. It must have been the couch.

Oh, get off this thing. Get off.

Oh, look at that. You ripped the cushion.

Damn, I had a screwdriver in my pocket.

You can hardly see the stuffing coming out.

Look at that. The cushion is ruined, Eddie, which means the couch is ruined.

I can fix it. No, no, no, no, no. You remember the last time I let you try to

fix it? We almost ended up homeless.

I don't even know what you're talking about, man.

Oh, no, you tripping, dude.

Let me refresh your memory.

Do you always bring girls back here on the first date?

Of course not.

You're special.

Am I really?

Let me show you how special.

Man,

I had the wildest night. I ran over this policeman's dog.

Eddie, Eddie.

No, man. I mean, the dog ain't chasing no more brothers.

His back leg's locked up. Just call him drag.

This is Roxy.

Oh, hi.

Go to bed.

That's exactly what I planned to do, man. I got to get my rest.

It's a big convention this weekend.

A lot of tours.

Those tow truck drivers are going to make a lot of money. Well, I'm thrilled

you and your kind, but I'm... And before I forget, I got my rent money two days

early. Kelly can't say nothing about my rent being late this month. All right.

Eddie. Eddie, nothing personal, but get the hell out of here.

Y 'all are so rude.

He doesn't have to go.

I like this woman. You mind if I join you?

That never happened before.

It's going to collect the funny bones.

It's just going to leave you alone while you're sitting inside your home.

not broken want to go jump on that oh man i'm sorry i didn't do it on purpose

it's never on purpose that's what scares me i'm gonna fix you up yeah buy you a

new couch yeah right now see this dude i told in my truck he gave me this coupon

right here said if i ever need some new furniture he'd take care of me oh a

whole five dollars off there's probably that much loose change in the couch

shouldn't have told me that that's gas money

I'm going to the station. I'm going to be late messing around with you.

That's all right. When you get home later on this evening, there's going to

couch right here. How are you going to get a new couch, huh? What are you going

to use as money?

Wasn't you listening to me last night?

No.

The convention.

Plenty of money.