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Original subtitles

Now the world don't move to the beat of just one drum. What might be right for

you may not be right for some.

A man is born, he's a man of need.

Then along come two, they got nothing but their genes. But they got different

strokes to take, different strokes to take, different strokes to move the

Everybody's got a special kind of story.

Everybody finds a way to shine.

It don't matter that you got not a lot. So what? I'll have theirs and you'll

have yours and I'll have mine.

And together we'll be fine. Different strokes to move the world.

Different strokes to move the world.

Oh, Pearl.

I thought you'd left already.

Oh, no, I was just about to go.

But I'll be back tomorrow as soon as I can, Mr. Drummond. Well, don't you

Pearl. If your mother isn't feeling better, you just take off all the time

you need.

Oh, thanks.

Fortunately, it was nothing serious, but I still don't understand why Mother was

riding around on that motorcycle.

Motorcycle? I always thought she made her false teeth when she said she was

having trouble with her choppers.

Oh, look.

Someone must have flipped this under the doors from the building management

company. The building management company.

They probably increased my rent again.

Whatever happened to rent control?

Nothing. The landlord still controls it.

Down with all capitalist pigs.

Oh, except you, Mr. Drummond.

I'll see you. Give my best to your mother. Okay, thank you. Bye -bye. Bye.

See what this is.

Oh!

Well, how about this? Hey, gang, come in here a minute.

Hey, I want to show you something.

What is it, Dad? Here is a hot news flash. Show business comes to Park

A television show is going to be shooting on location in our building

and the management hopes it won't be too inconvenient for the tenants.

Hey! That's great. That's my tiny inconvenience.

I wonder what TV show. Hey, maybe somebody in this building will be

Maybe somebody in this apartment.

Maybe somebody in my room.

Try not to let stardom go to my head.

Arnold,

who are you calling? Your agent?

No, wise guy.

I'm calling Dudley to tell him the good news.

Hello,

Dudley? It's Arnold.

Guess what?

They're going to shoot some big TV show in our building tomorrow.

No, no kidding.

Come over early so we can get a front row.

Both can come. Just tell your cousin to stay out of the way.

I don't want anybody hanging around the actors and bugging them for autographs.

That's my job.

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I'm coming, I'm coming.

Hi, Arnold.

This is my cousin, Angela.

He's a girl.

Oh, I know.

And you're all girls.

Hi. Now go sit down, Angela.

I told you to stay out of our way. Like you said, Arnold. You must have

misunderstood me, Dudley.

Please.

Take any seat you want.

My penthouse?

It's your penthouse.

Thank you.

Wow.

This is some pad.

She's a knockout.

She is?

It's hard to tell when you're related.

You're really pretty, Angela.

You sure don't take after Dudley's side of the family.

Thank you.

Yeah, thank you.

Arnold, you can feel the action down the street.

What a sight.

I'm more interested in the sights up here.

Hey, when are they going to start filming, Arnold?

Ah, what's the rush?

Meanwhile, we'll have a chance to get better acquainted, little mama.

You're quite a lady's man, aren't you, little papa?

That's because I was quite a lady.

Ladies first.

All right, we're going to shoot starting here towards the elevator. They get out

of the elevator, we dolly back into the hall. What do you want, kid?

I live here.

All right, do me a favor. Move back out of the way. You'll be in the way here.

Look at what a terrific place.

Early opulence. Hey, Bobby, come in here. Look at all this room. Look at

balcony.

Right, Chief. Look at the balcony. Look at the view. Why did you rent that flea

trap down the hall? That was stupid. Right, Chief. That was stupid.

We could do the whole scene right here. It's perfect.

He comes through the door. He grabs the guy and throws him out onto the balcony.

Hey, Arnold.

It sounds like they want to shoot the TV show right here in your apartment.

Yeah. That's the way my life is. One fabulous event after another one.

Yeah. And I'm surprised.

What? Dad, they told me about you.

I thought you were a nerd.

Here are all those guys out there.

That was a TV show. I think they want to do it in here. You're kidding.

Boy, what a mess it is out there. They've taken over the whole building. I

to wait ten minutes for an elevator.

Yes, yes.

Who are those people?

Hi there.

Is this your apartment?

The last time I checked.

I'm Stanley Pearlberg.

The Stanley Pearlberg? You've probably heard of him.

Oh, I'm afraid not.

Television director.

Sorry. Have you been out of the country?

Forgive me, but I just don't watch very much television.

Oh. Well, how would you like to make a few extra bucks, Mr., um... A drummond.

And I already have a few extra bucks.

Right. Well, maybe we can donate something to charity.

Yeah. Name your favorite disease.

We want to film part of our show here, Mr. Drummond. Here?

Oh, no. I'm afraid not. No, that'll be too much of a hassle. Oh, yeah.

That'll be fun.

Hey, sucker.

Let's get this show in the room.

Mr. T.

In the flesh.

What flesh?

It's all muscle.

An all -prime grade E.

You ready for me, Pearlie?

Not yet, Mr. T. Why don't you go downstairs and relax in your trailer?

Yeah, go relax, T -Baby.

You call me T -Baby one more time, and I'm going to break every bone in your

pitiful little body.

Excuse me, are they filming the A -Team here? That's right.

Come shoot here, please. No, I don't. Oh, please. Dad, it's like a little bit

cultural experience.

It'll broaden the horizon.

Yes, come on, David.

All right.

All right, all right. I don't want my children to be culturally deprived.

Hooray!

That's terrific, Mr. Drummond. Now, if you'll just come with me, I'll have the

production manager work out all the arrangements.

Yeah, all the arrangements. Shut up, Bobby.

I'm going to go downstairs and see if Joy's for part.

I think I'll go through the things he started that need to be discovered.

This is fantastic, Arnold.

Yeah. See what I did for you, sweet pea?

And there's a lot more where that came from.

He's so wonderful.

Thank you.

I mean, Mr. T.

I can't get the first face with your cousin since Mr. T showed up.

Do you have any suggestions?

Nope. She seems to be immune to my many charms.

Do you have any idea what she goes for?

No, but I know what she doesn't go for.

What's that?

You.

Bobby, where is the heavy for this scene? Let's get moving.

She should have been here, Chief.

Maybe got stuck in traffic. Well, we've got to rehearse. Get me somebody,

anybody.

Somebody, anybody.

Hey, kids, how's it going? Oh, it's really exciting.

Excuse me.

Mr. Drummond. Yes?

I wonder if you could help me out. It seems that one of the actors is late. I

thought maybe you could fill in for him.

Me? Yeah.

I'm no actor.

Although, I did do a number of plays when I was in college.

As a professional, you probably picked up on that, right?

No. But you're here.

Come on, Dad.

You can do it, Dad. You're an actor. Oh, all right, why not? If I learned

anything at all from those Mickey Rooney films, it's that the show must go on.

Hey, Chief.

Chief, Mr. Drummond said he'd fill in for us. Oh, fine.

Good, Mr. Drummond. You want to stand about here.

Shouldn't I have makeup?

Well, you don't need it for rehearsal, but go ahead if it's something you

normally wear around the house.

Oh, not really.

Oh, maybe occasion's a little eyeliner.

Mr. T, we're ready for you now.

Mr. T, I want you to meet Mr.

Drummond. He's going to stand in for us. Just call me Phil. What shall I call

you? Mr. T.

Andrew, are you comfortable?

Is there anything you'd like?

Yes, if you don't mind, I'd like to concentrate on Mr. T.

All right, Mr. T, I think you know what this scene is.

Yeah, got it.

Good. All right, Mr. Drummond, you'll be on the couch with Wendy, darling.

You're on the couch with Mr. Drummond.

Mr. T has entered the room. He sees you with his girlfriend.

You're coming on to her.

No, get a little closer. You've got your arm around her.

I've got to line up this shot. Wendy, help him out.

Good. Oh, yes, that's perfect. All right, now, Mr. Drummond.

He's really steaming.

He picked the villain up. What?

That's my woman, dear man.

He throws him against the wall and he stomps on his head and he mashes his

Hold it, wait a minute.

Time, would you put me down, please? What's the problem?

I'm afraid you'll strain yourself.

Are you kidding?

My goal changed a wee more than you.

All right, put him down. We'll go to lunch.

They're serving my favorite today.

Cheese.

Daddy, are you okay? Are you okay, Dad? Of course.

Why do you ask?

Well, you look pretty scared up there.

I was supposed to show fear, and I did.

Pretty good acting, huh?

Not as good as you're doing right now.

Well, Mr. Drummond, thanks for your help.

Why don't you and your family join us downstairs for some chow? Well, thanks.

What do you say, guys? Come on, Angela. You've been suiting me at lunch.

Thanks, but I have other plans.

Excuse me, Mr. T.

Well, little lady, hello there.

I'm a big fan of yours, and I was wondering if I could please sit with you

lunch. Never let it be said that Mr. T said no to a irresistible lady.

You're the most handsome star on TV.

Oh, and you got brains, too.

See, Arnold.

What if he's seeing that guy?

Take away his muscle, fame, and his money, and he's nothing.

Right. And if she's going to go for nothing, she might as well go for you.

Forget it, Arnold. Let's go have some lunch.

You go ahead, Dudley. I'm not very hungry.

Boy, how am I going to compete with Mr. T?

I got to think of something.

Oh, boy.

Dad, what a spread.

I mean, quiche, steak, lobster, pork chops. I still don't understand how Mr.

got all of that into one sandwich.

He spoke to me.

Tobit, you're in my feet.

Hey, would anybody like to join me for something cold to drink? Oh, yeah,

be great.

I wonder where Arnold wandered off to.

I don't know. It's not like him to miss a good meal. It's not like him to miss a

bad meal.

Angela, I gotta talk to you.

Sure, Dudley.

What's up?

Well, could you do me a favor?

When Arnold comes back, try to be a little friendlier to him, okay?

Okay, but why?

Well, because he kind of digs you.

Well, that's nice, but I'm afraid my kind of man is Mr. T.

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Only on BET.

I'm amazing.

I'm a monster.

How do you like me now, little darling?

East your eyes, for my bod's a banquet.

Well,

what

do we have here?

but this is what I call a real fan.

It's like real capital T and small p.

Arnold, what on earth have you done to yourself?

I don't believe it.

Are you out of your shave skull?

Hey, you may not like it, but Angela loves it. Right, Angie?

I think you look really... Ridiculous.

What are you talking about, Angie?

I think that haircut is dumb.

Hey, watch it, little lady.

Just on him. I love it on you.

Arnold.

Arnold, wait. Arnold.

Poor Arnold. He's pulled some silly stunts in the past, but this one really

takes the cake. Yeah.

This is going to earn him a permanent place in the Airhead Hall of Fame.

I can't imagine what would make him do something like this.

Uh, Mr. Drummond, I think it was to impress Angela.

He impressed me, all right.

Mr. Drummond, would you mind if I had a talk with Arnold?

Oh, not at all.

I'm sure he'd like that. Come on, I'll show you the way. Sure.

Oh, they're right.

I look ridiculous.

Like a porcupine died on my head.

Can I come in, little T?

Sure, big T.

I thought we might have a little talk.

You know, like head to head.

Sure, what about?

Well, I'm really flattered that you tried to look like me to impress that

I even glued some hair on my chest.

More than what I got.

But anyway, I think you're going about this all the wrong way.

What do you mean?

You see, if you want to get somewhere in life, or with a girl, you can't go

around copying somebody else.

You got to be your own original.

That's easy for you to say.

You've got a lot more to work with.

You're built like a mountain.

You're more like a speed bump.

The thing that matters the most is on the inside.

It's not what you look like on the outside.

How do I go about being an original?

You're already there, little brother.

I am?

Yeah. I never met anybody like you before in the world.

Man, you outrageous.

You really think so?

Definitely. So just be yourself.

But remember, though, you can't force girls into liking you. Of course I can,

but that's another story.

Then what should I do?

Do? Man, don't do anything.

If a girl don't like you, that's her loss.

But I'm sure you'll find plenty that will.

You really think so?

Hey, I'm positive.

So you just be yourself and play it cool and let the chicks fall where they may.

Thanks, Big T.

I feel a lot better now.

Oh, super, super.

Now you come on down upstairs with me and watch me film this scene.

I'm going to stomp on this guy. I'm going to mess his head to the carpet.

going to break both his legs.

You're going to do all that?

Yeah, we're trying something new this week on the A -Team.

Less action and more heart.

Her mother fell off a motorcycle and she didn't know we'd be shooting here

today.

All right, all right, all right. We'll set up for another shot.

Actors, take five.

Actors, take five.

You packed quite a while up there, Big Mama.

So do you, Thunder Thighs.

Arnold, is that you?

It's me.

You look like Mr.

T exploded and you're one of the pieces.

I'm filming down at Coney Island tomorrow.

How would you like to come down and have lunch with me?

Can I do it?

I'd be crazy to say no to a little tea.

You're liable to pick me up over your head and mash my face in the carpet.

The trouble is, I'd sure get laughed at going around looking like this.

Oh, don't worry about nothing.

I got a makeup lady over there who can make you look like you got a full head

hair until the rest of yours grows in.

What a relief.

I was afraid I was going to have to keep using this.

I didn't jog seven miles.

I didn't think I could do it, but I did it.

Oh, I don't think I can make another step.

Hey,

Mal.

You know what?

Seven more miles couldn't hurt. No pain, no gain.

I'm trying to tell you something, man.

Wait, I'm trying to tell you. Man, wait a minute, man.

I'm trying to tell you guys something.

From now on, we're going to be able to have breakfast together every morning.

From now on.

You guys want to know why?

Gypsy curse?

I got a job.

What, waking my ass up?

No, man. Down the block at the Gagin building.

You were looking at the junior exec.

That's right.

Big beef, frozen meat.

That's right.

Chop flank division.

You see, I'm not ready for the pressure of those filet mignon guys.

That's where their cell phones and their cow ties.

Volkswagen Passats with the T -bone on the side.

See, I'm working my way up to Porterhouse.

That's right.

Then a year or two, Chateau Brown.

That's the limit.

No limit soldier.

What, what?

I mean, Bill Gates didn't even finish college, and he's a bigger geek than I

Is that the home?

and a good morning to you too.

How are you? I'm Dexter Sherman, a big beef frozen meat.

I've got a large collection of meat. We've got boxes all over the place.

bones.

Hello and good morning. Yeah, I'm Dexter Sherman, a big beef frozen meat.

Hey, Eddie Boy Mouth. I'm glad you guys can make it, man. Thanks for coming

down, man. Well, listen, we got to get back to the club, so what's up?

I got something to tell you guys, and it's big, big news.

Listen closely.

I'm getting married.

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