All language subtitles for Diffrent Strokes s04e24 Short But Sweet

It wouldn't be right to throw a big
party while the economy is in such a

recession. Thank you, Elliot Janeway.

Bye. Bye.

You know, when Arnold starts to worry
about the economy, I start to worry

Arnold. I have a feeling there's
something that he is not telling us.

would he turn on a birthday party?

You're not having a birthday party?

Arnold, you just ruin my appetite.

In that case, I'll finish your lunch. I
just got my appetite back.

Well, I'm sorry, Dudley, but there isn't
going to be a birthday party.

Man, there's sure going to be a lot of
disappointed kids, Arnold.

Your birthday party's a social event of
the year, next to some of Cockroach

Race's at school.

I have my reasons for not having a
party, Dudley.

Like what?

Well, I can't tell you. It's very
personal.

Look. I'll make a trade with you.

If I tell you something real personal
about me, then can you tell me?

I guess so.

Okay.

Don't ever mention this, but one night
last week, I dreamed I was a baby.

I was lying in my crib, sucking on a
pacifier.

When I woke up, I discovered I wet my
bed.

That's not personal enough.

Not personal enough?

Even my mother doesn't know.

I was washing sheets at 2 o 'clock in
the morning.

Some friend you are, Arnold. Get
yourself another death penalty.

Don't wait, Dudley. I'll tell you. I
don't want to hear it. It's too late.

Okay. Why don't you want to give a
party?

Well, look at me.

Okay.

What do you see?

I see you.

Now, what about me?

You got a new pimple?

I mean, besides that.

Look at all of me. Not just my face.

What do you see?

I wet the bed and you tell me you're
short?

Arnold, everybody knows that.

Yeah, especially girls.

That's the problem.

You mean you're not going to have
another birthday party to your tall?

Nope. Girls don't go for me.

Are you kidding?

You're very popular.

Girls like you.

Not the way I want them to.

They don't take me seriously.

They... Treat me like a pet.

They pat my head, rub my cheeks, pull my
ears.

They do everything but throw a stick and
yell fetch.

Come on, Arnold. You're exaggerating.

No, I'm not. It was different when I was
younger. But now that I'm 11,

everybody's got a girl but me.

No girl wants to kiss a guy who only
comes up to her training bra.

have a girl, Dudley.

What do you mean, even me?

I'm a very charming, debonair dude.

I'm one of the most eligible guys in the
sixth grade.

You're also taller than me.

That's why you got a girl and I don't.

Hi, fellas.

Hi.

Hi, Teresa.

See what I mean?

I'm surprised you didn't offer me a bowl
of kibble.

Are you kidding?

She likes you.

She makes a special point of coming
over.

She gives you a big smile and a big
hello.

And you just sit there like that
incredible lump.

Don't you like her?

Like her?

When I'm not dreaming about food, I
dream about her.

But what did you expect me to do?

Climb up on her lap? and kiss her?

No, but if you acted more friendly and
invited her to that party that you ought

to be throwing, I bet she'd say yes.

No way. You're just chicken.

Okay, Dudley.

I guess I'm gonna have to show you. I'm
gonna go over there and ask her and

she's gonna dump all over me and make me
feel like dirt and then that'll prove

what a fool you are.

Sounds reasonable.

Hi, Teresa.

Can I talk to you for a second?

Sure.

Um, well, Saturday's my birthday.

Not that I'm trying to hit you up for a
present.

Well, congratulations, Arnold.

Anyway,

I was thinking of throwing a party.

And if I did, you probably wouldn't want
to come.

Oh, I'd love to.

I don't blame you for not... Did you say
love, too?

I'd like to go very much, Arnold. I'm
glad you asked me.

You are?

Well, that's terrific.

It's Saturday night at my penthouse.

Arnold!

Did you change your mind?

No, but what time is the party?

What time would you like it to be?

How about 7 o 'clock?

You got it. I'll see you.

We're going to have the best party I
ever gave.

Only this time we're not going to be
stupid.

We're going to shake hands first, then
play spin the bottle.

Way to go, lover.

Hi, Teresa.

Hi, Arnold.

I forgot to ask you.

How are you getting to the party?

I guess my folks will bring me.

I can do better than that. I'll send my
dad's chauffeur limo for you.

I'm talking long, black, and paid for.

Oh, I can't believe this. It's just like
in the movies. A penthouse, a big

party, a limo.

I feel like Cinderella.

Yeah?

How would you like to be Cinderella?

What do you mean?

What I mean is, I'll make it a costume
party.

And you could dress like Cinderella.

But please, don't think of me as your
fairy godmother.

Marlon, you're too much. I am?

picked up in a limousine.

Limousine? Fantastic!

That's right, Dudley. I got a date with
Teresa.

I got a date!

I guess she liked you all the time, but
you just never made the big move.

Yeah.

Hey, maybe I got that kind of charm that
sneaks up on women.

But anyway, it looks like little
Arnold's got himself a big mama.

This is going to be the biggest night of
my life.

Come on.

One man seeks redemption.

I got to have one in midlife crisis, you
know. And find his voice.

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I'll put these over here. Great. Here,
Adelaide. Thanks a lot for helping me,

gang. Oh, they are going to look so cute
in their costumes.

Oh, Willis, couldn't we hang around so
we could see them? No way. Right, Dad?

Right. Arnold gave strict orders.

Anybody over 12 years old caught in the
living room gets a nose full of party

dip.

Well, what about you, Adelaide? You're
over 12.

I got a fake ID.

Arnold gave me a special pass for
serving.

I put hairspray on my plumes.

Who are you supposed to be, Arnold?

Who else? Prince Charming.

Might one ask if there's a Cinderella?

One might ask, but one ain't gonna see
her because one ain't gonna be here.

I happen to know that Cinderella's name
is Teresa.

I'm arranged to have her picked up in my
chauffeur -driven pumpkin.

Sounds like we got a hot romance going
on here. Tell us about it, Prince.

Well, I first saw her last semester.

Our eyes went across a crowded
cafeteria.

I got so excited, I squeezed my hot dog
right out of the bun.

Boy, she must be something really
special.

All right, how come you never mentioned
your dream girl before now?

I never knew she liked me.

I worshipped her from afar, but now I'm
going to worship her from an ear.

His Highness has just issued a royal
proclamation. We're all banished from

living room.

My first guest. Get banished. I'm going.
Get banished. I'm going.

I'm going. I'm going.

Food's on the table.

Everybody, start pigging out.

Who are you supposed to be, Arnie?

Prince Charming. Who are you?

President Reagan.

President Reagan?

Yeah, in his movie, Cattle Queen of
Montana.

I was lucky. I missed that one.

Have some food, Dudley. Okay.

mine.

Well, it's a coincidence that Prince
Charming meets a Cinderella in the

going to the same party. It's not a
coincidence, Arnold. We came together in

your limousine.

Billy's my date.

You're talking about Teresa.

Well, enjoy yourselves.

Uh, excuse me.

I have to go to the kitchen to kill
myself.

You're sitting on the couch, you're
watching TV, and your life's passing you

Maybe I'll go to school next year, maybe
next semester. No, do it right now.

They'll work with you after work, or you
can go before work. Go talk to somebody

right now. They out to help you. All you
gotta do is pick up the phone and make

the call. Why are you making it
complicated? It's easy.

I refer to myself as just,

It's hard to control them. Because they
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Guess who's back in the building?

Nothing but party people.

It's your dirty Nelly. I'm going to be
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hot and hair Nelly takeover. I'll be
doing this thing all week. Nelly, grab

city. I'm here.

There are people that don't want to be
around each other. What kind of bisexual

was this?

It was just inappropriate for my mother
to be in the room. The tissue is so

thick you can cut it with a knife. We
decided to go out.

Don't make me because I will.

I can't go out to dinner with this
mother.

You can tell he's frustrated.

His jaw is clenched.

He's not really trying to say anything.

I just want to choke. Get out of the
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Why don't we get... Okay, enjoy the
movie. Can I have fun, kids?

Hey, Arnold, how's the party going? You
having a good time?

Send everybody home.

What do you mean?

This party is canceled.

But it just started.

You know that girl I'm so crazy about?

What about her?

I hate her.

What happened, Arnold?

Billy came with Teresa.

She's her date.

Oh, no, wait a minute. I thought that
you were her date.

So did I.

I'd like to give Cinderella a shot with
her glass whippers.

Look, little brother, you want to win,
Teresa?

Well, here's what you do.

You just slide up to a real cool and you
say, here's what's going down, baby.

You only have eyes for me because I'm
your fella, Cinderella.

Lewis, you're so full of bull.

You never came on to me like that. What
I liked about you was that you were just

the opposite.

You were sweet and kind and gentle.

Charlene, let's get out of here before
you ruin my reputation.

Can I go with you?

Mine's already ruined.

Hey, I'm sorry this happened, Arnold.

Well, tell me something.

If Teresa had a date with you, why would
she bring somebody else?

Because she's a bigamist, that's why.

Are you sure there hasn't been some kind
of a misunderstanding here?

No.

I personally asked her to come over, and
she leaned right down and said yes to

my face.

And did you make it perfectly clear that
you were asking her to be your date at

your party, not just a guest?

Run up on me again?

See, Arnold, I think it's possible that
she didn't know that she was going to be

your date.

You know, you're right, Dad.

When I asked her, I was nervous.

Well, the same thing's happened to me,
Arnold.

How old were you?

Fifty. It was last night.

Mr. Dan, I'll never get a girl of my
own.

Oh, that's not at all true, Arnold.

You're selling yourself short. I mean...
Listen, son, come here.

See, everybody has certain problems,
certain handicaps that they have to

to live with.

I think I'm going to be a monk.

I'm going to give up women and be
celebrated.

I don't think you have to go quite that
far.

You know, actually, son, you've got an
awful lot going for you.

Being short doesn't really matter.

That's easy to say when you're tall.

Well, look at Napoleon.

His wife was the beautiful Josephine.

And the famous jockey, Willie Shoemaker,
he has a beautiful wife.

Even Mickey Rooney, all eight of his
wives are very beautiful.

I don't want a wife. I want a date.

Well, That shouldn't be too hard for a
guy with all your natural charm and

and good manners, except when you're
reading, of course.

Always remember this, Arnold. Women like
to be treated with respect and

consideration.

They do?

Oh, sure.

In school.

You've read about Sir Walter Raleigh,
haven't you?

Yeah. He's the clown that invented
cigarettes.

Yeah, that's true, but he also did some
good things. Now, there was a real

gentleman. On one occasion, a lady
wanted to cross the street, but there

this big puddle of water. You know what
he did?

He took off his cape and he threw it
over the puddle so her feet wouldn't get

wet. After that, all the women in London
loved him.

Did he?

Right.

And the only time he didn't have a woman
with him was when they buried him.

Arnold, instead of feeling sorry for
yourself, you should make the best of

you got. I promise you, you'll be
surprised at the results.

But how do I do that?

Let me give you a couple of suggestions.

Are my guests enjoying themselves?

Yeah, it's a great party, Arnold.

Aren't you eating, my dear?

May I show you something in the way of a
hot dog? Thank you, Arnold.

All right, here we go.

Get one of these hot dogs.

Mustard.

Here you are.

Thanks. These hot dogs look good,
Arnold.

like one, my dear? Yes, I would. Good.

Ladies first.

You're very considerate, Arnold.

There aren't many of us gentlemen left,
and I love the zilch in your voice.

Thank you, Arnold.

And the cute way you tilt your head when
you giggle.

I'll get you a glass of punch, Teresa.

Thank you. My pleasure.

What are you going to do?

Drink it for her?

Yes, if she wishes.

Look, she's my date.

I'll get it for her.

Hey, now what could you have done?

It's all over the floor.

No problem.

No problem.

It's just that he's 11 now, and I hear
puberty can do weird things to a guy.

Well, I think Arnold is the only
gentleman here.

Yeah, I'm with you.

Well, thank you for being so
considerate, Arnold.

You know, you've got a lot of class.

No sweat.

Excuse me. Could I talk to you for a
second?

Do you think we could go to a movie or
something sometime?

Like a real date?

Well, to tell you the truth, Arnold, I
never thought of you that way.

Oh.

I understand.

Well, eat all you want anyway.

Just a minute.

I never thought of you that way because
at school you're just a... Well, just a

cute little kid.

I know.

But now that I see this side of you, I
realize there's much more to you.

Yeah? Like what?

Well, you're so confident, thoughtful,
and charming.

That's me.

So, can we go on a date sometime?

I'd love to.

Oh, man.

Would you like to walk across my cape
again?

Nothing but the...

is in 20 minutes. I can't leave without
him. He's got my clubs.

Oh, well, if he doesn't show up, I'll be
glad to take his place.

You go?

Well, I don't want to brag or anything,
but I got a hole -in -one last week.

What? Oh, yo, that's great.

You just got to wait for the clown's
mouth to get all the way open.

Too much time on your head.

Cool.

Can I drive it? No, but you can watch
it.

Thanks.

This is nice work and all, but don't you
think it's a little, I don't know, over

the top?

No, man, this is me, Eddie Sherman.

Red flames on blue skies.

You got a good figure?

You tell me.

Isn't it quite funny, Bob?

inside getting home.

I'll take the crab cake, vodka gimlet,
and your phone number, kitten.

Kitten?

That's right.

You're soft, you're cute, and I can make
you purr.

Oh, really?

Well, I'm tired, I'm cranky, and I can
make you a woman.

hands on me. Girl, you know you like
that.

Well, now I'm going to have to put my
hands on you.

Please do.

Hey,

what's going on here? That's just crazy.

He touched me in an inappropriate
manner.

Nick and Letty is a valued customer of
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Now, if there's any more problems,
please let me handle it. Now, do I make

myself clear?

Yes, sir.

Hand me the tray.

Get your freaking

If I wasn't a Christian... Thank you,
Eddie. But you

know I could have handled him myself.

I know. I just didn't want you to break
a fingernail or something.

You might have asked for the night off.
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