All language subtitles for Dear John s02e23 Aunt Red
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1
00:00:01,309 --> 00:00:02,670
Hi, Brad. How are you?
2
00:00:03,070 --> 00:00:04,150
How are you?
3
00:00:04,670 --> 00:00:06,010
Will you listen to this guy?
4
00:00:06,230 --> 00:00:08,930
How are you? You're so considerate.
5
00:00:09,390 --> 00:00:15,830
You know, John, old buddy, I was
thinking about what good friends we are
6
00:00:15,830 --> 00:00:19,850
you would do anything for me. And you
know what else I was thinking?
7
00:00:20,150 --> 00:00:21,890
That you should cut back on your
medication?
8
00:00:24,450 --> 00:00:28,650
That's funny, John. No, I was thinking
that since the seniors are voting for
9
00:00:28,650 --> 00:00:30,550
teacher of the year, that, uh...
10
00:00:30,810 --> 00:00:33,010
you would maybe hand out these flyers to
your classes.
11
00:00:33,990 --> 00:00:37,030
Coach Derman, educator, humanitarian,
orphan?
12
00:00:38,310 --> 00:00:39,310
Well, almost.
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00:00:39,430 --> 00:00:41,530
My father passed away two years ago.
14
00:00:41,810 --> 00:00:43,090
My mother's on the ropes.
15
00:00:44,350 --> 00:00:48,930
I'm sorry, Brad, but I'm not going to do
your campaigning for you. Oh, I get it,
16
00:00:48,970 --> 00:00:52,390
John. You want to win teacher of the
year. You know, Brad, this may sound
17
00:00:52,390 --> 00:00:55,270
strange to you, but I don't need a
plaque to know that I'm a good teacher.
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00:00:55,690 --> 00:00:59,150
My reward is seeing a kid graduate, go
to college, and make something of
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00:00:59,150 --> 00:01:01,410
himself. You've got a sports mentality.
20
00:01:01,930 --> 00:01:02,930
You know something?
21
00:01:03,450 --> 00:01:05,690
Competition between teachers isn't very
healthy.
22
00:01:06,810 --> 00:01:08,370
Yeah, you're right, John.
23
00:01:08,670 --> 00:01:09,750
Winning isn't everything.
24
00:01:11,070 --> 00:01:13,610
Well, thanks, John. I needed to hear
that.
25
00:01:14,850 --> 00:01:17,670
God, how I wish every teacher in this
school felt that way.
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00:01:18,310 --> 00:01:19,390
I'd be a shoo -in.
27
00:01:21,910 --> 00:01:22,910
Winning isn't everything?
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00:01:23,150 --> 00:01:25,990
Oh, that's a good one, John. Say hi to
the tooth fairy for me.
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00:01:35,310 --> 00:01:36,830
By the time you...
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00:02:12,750 --> 00:02:15,290
Dear John is filmed before the studio
audience.
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00:02:17,010 --> 00:02:21,230
Now, look, Wendy, we've been divorced
for two years now. You got the car, you
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00:02:21,230 --> 00:02:22,230
pay for the car repairs.
33
00:02:23,410 --> 00:02:25,470
I don't care if it needs a new
transmission.
34
00:02:25,690 --> 00:02:29,470
Now, look, Wendy, Wendy, there is
nothing you can do to make me change my
35
00:02:29,590 --> 00:02:31,630
No, no, no, nothing. Oh, hi, son.
36
00:02:34,310 --> 00:02:38,550
No, no, no, no, no, no. Of course you're
not going to have to walk six miles to
37
00:02:38,550 --> 00:02:40,050
school in the freezing rain.
38
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No, Matthew.
39
00:02:43,310 --> 00:02:46,810
No, just tell Mommy that Daddy's going
to pay to have the car fixed.
40
00:02:47,930 --> 00:02:48,930
What?
41
00:02:49,830 --> 00:02:51,990
She needs a car phone, too?
42
00:02:53,850 --> 00:02:58,330
No, no, no, Matthew, Matthew, all right,
all right. Just tell Mommy that Daddy
43
00:02:58,330 --> 00:02:59,470
will think about it.
44
00:03:01,630 --> 00:03:05,810
I have fresh donuts here. I want
everyone to try one.
45
00:03:06,270 --> 00:03:07,270
Hey,
46
00:03:08,390 --> 00:03:09,910
has anyone seen my coffee mug?
47
00:03:10,290 --> 00:03:11,290
No.
48
00:03:11,480 --> 00:03:15,480
But while we go into the storage room,
turn off all the lights, get down on our
49
00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:17,140
hands and knees and look for it.
50
00:03:18,580 --> 00:03:22,340
Wait a minute, Kate. This never may
explain where your coffee mug and the
51
00:03:22,340 --> 00:03:26,420
rack have disappeared to. It says that
starting tonight, a new group is meeting
52
00:03:26,420 --> 00:03:27,960
in this room right before us.
53
00:03:28,320 --> 00:03:29,660
Oh? What group is that?
54
00:03:30,900 --> 00:03:31,900
Kleptomaniacs Anonymous.
55
00:03:34,020 --> 00:03:38,680
Anyone interested in joining, please
sign below with a pen attached for your
56
00:03:38,680 --> 00:03:39,680
convenience.
57
00:03:44,470 --> 00:03:47,210
Hi, everybody. Hey, there he is.
58
00:03:50,350 --> 00:03:51,350
What happened? Go right.
59
00:03:52,270 --> 00:03:54,230
It's a long story, John.
60
00:03:54,610 --> 00:03:57,510
Now, listen, I've got a statement to
make right here and right now. If
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00:03:57,510 --> 00:04:01,370
hears me talk about getting remarried, I
want everybody in this group to jump on
62
00:04:01,370 --> 00:04:02,930
me and beat me to a bloody pulp.
63
00:04:05,150 --> 00:04:07,850
What's tasting you, Biscuit? Oh, Wendy.
64
00:04:08,050 --> 00:04:09,050
She's driving me crazy.
65
00:04:09,450 --> 00:04:12,090
She got the car under divorce, and I'm
the one who has to pay for a new
66
00:04:12,090 --> 00:04:15,630
transmission. Well, that sounds fair to
me. She gets a new transmission, and you
67
00:04:15,630 --> 00:04:16,630
get the old chef.
68
00:04:19,870 --> 00:04:24,230
Hello. I'm looking for the 121 Club. And
you found it.
69
00:04:24,610 --> 00:04:25,610
Louise. Yes?
70
00:04:26,650 --> 00:04:29,630
I spoke with you today on the phone. I'm
Barry Sindler.
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00:04:29,890 --> 00:04:36,290
Oh, right. The one who's going through a
painful, tortuous, devastating, gut
72
00:04:36,290 --> 00:04:38,050
-wrenching divorce.
73
00:04:38,859 --> 00:04:40,240
So glad you're here.
74
00:04:41,220 --> 00:04:42,220
Everybody.
75
00:04:42,720 --> 00:04:43,800
Hi, Barry.
76
00:04:44,460 --> 00:04:49,740
Now, Barry, why don't you just sit in
here and tell us a little bit about
77
00:04:49,740 --> 00:04:53,180
yourself, your marriage, what you do, et
cetera.
78
00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:57,960
Well, like I said, my name is Barry.
79
00:04:58,320 --> 00:05:01,800
And as she told you, I'm going through a
divorce.
80
00:05:02,760 --> 00:05:05,260
I'm not sure I should even mention what
I do for a living.
81
00:05:05,540 --> 00:05:06,540
Oh, why not?
82
00:05:06,890 --> 00:05:10,470
Well, it could be something you've all
had trouble with at one time or another.
83
00:05:10,730 --> 00:05:11,810
You're a vice cop?
84
00:05:13,930 --> 00:05:15,030
Mrs. Felber, please.
85
00:05:15,510 --> 00:05:18,210
Come on, Barry, we're all friends here.
No one's going to bar you from this
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00:05:18,210 --> 00:05:19,470
group because of what you do for a
living.
87
00:05:19,730 --> 00:05:20,730
Well,
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00:05:21,790 --> 00:05:23,450
okay. I'm a divorce lawyer.
89
00:05:27,150 --> 00:05:30,910
Everybody, that will be quite enough.
90
00:05:32,630 --> 00:05:34,090
Let's be civilized.
91
00:05:36,080 --> 00:05:40,220
This man is asking for our support and
he's going to get it right, everybody.
92
00:05:41,340 --> 00:05:42,340
Yeah.
93
00:05:43,880 --> 00:05:47,440
Now, Barry, tell us about your divorce.
94
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Well... It's been very painful. Good.
John!
95
00:05:57,940 --> 00:05:59,200
Go ahead, Barry.
96
00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:03,420
Well, my wife and I have been married
for 13 years.
97
00:06:03,700 --> 00:06:05,120
We met in San Francisco.
98
00:06:05,870 --> 00:06:08,570
It was a summer of love. A season of
joy.
99
00:06:08,930 --> 00:06:14,970
Now I find myself in court doing my best
to completely humiliate and belittle
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00:06:14,970 --> 00:06:16,550
her. There's no joy in that.
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00:06:16,970 --> 00:06:18,210
Don't we know it.
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00:06:18,590 --> 00:06:20,750
Certain amount of professional pride, of
course.
103
00:06:23,510 --> 00:06:26,590
Look, maybe somebody else should talk
first.
104
00:06:26,890 --> 00:06:31,810
Well, perhaps someone here would like to
show Barry how our group functions. How
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00:06:31,810 --> 00:06:36,930
by opening up and sharing, we've been
able to get past our problems and become
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whole again.
107
00:06:38,670 --> 00:06:39,670
Ralph!
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00:06:43,170 --> 00:06:46,890
There's something that's been bothering
me for a very long time.
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Glad I got that off my chest.
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00:06:58,010 --> 00:06:59,110
Thank you, Ralph.
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00:06:59,670 --> 00:07:03,750
John, perhaps you'd like to tell us
what's on your mind tonight. Louise, we
112
00:07:03,750 --> 00:07:04,830
already know what I have on my mind.
113
00:07:08,539 --> 00:07:14,400
My ex -wife uses the car to drive my son
to school and to soccer practice and to
114
00:07:14,400 --> 00:07:18,340
his music lessons, which, by the way, I
still pay for.
115
00:07:18,740 --> 00:07:22,120
So why the hell do I have to pay for the
upkeep on that car?
116
00:07:22,420 --> 00:07:26,440
You pay for the upkeep on your ex
-wife's car? Well, it's in my name.
117
00:07:27,680 --> 00:07:30,260
She's got the car, but it's in your
name?
118
00:07:30,480 --> 00:07:33,520
Well, it has to be because I pay for the
insurance.
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00:07:35,440 --> 00:07:41,140
No offense, John, but guys like me love
seeing guys like you in court. You know,
120
00:07:41,200 --> 00:07:44,920
the legal profession has a technical
term for people like you.
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00:07:45,460 --> 00:07:46,460
Doormat.
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00:07:48,300 --> 00:07:54,800
Boy, talk about your legal mumbo -jumbo.
Now, wait a minute here. I am not a
123
00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:58,400
doormat. For your information, my wife
and I had a very fair settlement. Yeah,
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00:07:58,500 --> 00:08:02,420
they split everything right down the
middle. And she took both halves.
125
00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:05,680
Doormat.
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00:08:06,890 --> 00:08:09,810
Dad, if I were you, I'd reopen my
divorce settlement.
127
00:08:10,050 --> 00:08:11,050
No thanks.
128
00:08:11,950 --> 00:08:14,170
I want to put my son through another
divorce.
129
00:08:15,510 --> 00:08:19,990
Perhaps someone else would like to share
with us something that doesn't involve
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00:08:19,990 --> 00:08:21,050
name -calling.
131
00:08:21,410 --> 00:08:22,530
Just a second.
132
00:08:23,370 --> 00:08:26,810
Barry, are you saying that if someone
thinks they got a raw deal, they can
133
00:08:26,810 --> 00:08:28,350
renegotiate their settlement?
134
00:08:28,750 --> 00:08:32,770
Oh, sure. We do it every day. Hey,
listen. If you're bitter about how
135
00:08:32,770 --> 00:08:35,230
turned out... No, no, I'm not bitter.
Why should I be bitter?
136
00:08:35,740 --> 00:08:39,120
Just because I put my husband through
medical school and he dumped me? That's
137
00:08:39,120 --> 00:08:40,120
good reason. Damn right.
138
00:08:41,880 --> 00:08:44,760
But, you know, now I've got a whole new
life.
139
00:08:45,140 --> 00:08:47,020
I got everything I wanted out of the
divorce.
140
00:08:47,300 --> 00:08:50,360
Well, good for you. Well, then you got
everything you're entitled to.
141
00:08:50,620 --> 00:08:55,500
You got your equity stake in his medical
practice. You got IRA investments, at
142
00:08:55,500 --> 00:08:57,140
least half of his pension plan, right?
143
00:08:58,000 --> 00:08:59,100
Well, not exactly.
144
00:09:00,380 --> 00:09:02,320
So, uh, what did you get?
145
00:09:05,610 --> 00:09:06,610
Got the dining room table.
146
00:09:08,910 --> 00:09:11,570
I'm sorry, I didn't hear you. She got a
table.
147
00:09:13,110 --> 00:09:14,570
It was a dining room table.
148
00:09:16,730 --> 00:09:18,750
Dormat! Just like John.
149
00:09:18,970 --> 00:09:23,450
Oh, just a second. I've been through my
divorce and now I'm moving on with my
150
00:09:23,450 --> 00:09:24,450
life.
151
00:09:24,590 --> 00:09:25,590
Dormat!
152
00:09:27,330 --> 00:09:32,510
On the other hand, maybe I should go
after my ex. This has been bothering me
153
00:09:32,510 --> 00:09:33,610
a really long time.
154
00:09:33,950 --> 00:09:38,130
Kate. Listen, if you want a little legal
help, here's my card.
155
00:09:38,670 --> 00:09:39,890
You'd do that for me?
156
00:09:40,190 --> 00:09:43,350
Why, sure. We're all in the same group.
It's like we're family.
157
00:09:43,710 --> 00:09:44,449
That's right.
158
00:09:44,450 --> 00:09:45,970
We're just like the Simpsons.
159
00:09:48,770 --> 00:09:49,770
But prettier.
160
00:09:51,110 --> 00:09:56,290
Boy, I'd love to take that chiseler for
every nickel I've got coming to me. Hey,
161
00:09:56,510 --> 00:09:57,610
would you listen to yourself?
162
00:09:58,050 --> 00:10:01,690
I mean, you're suddenly sounding greedy,
uncaring, very petty.
163
00:10:02,510 --> 00:10:06,230
Well, at least I'm not like you, John,
letting someone like Wendy walk all over
164
00:10:06,230 --> 00:10:10,790
me. Hey, I think you're being a little
harsh with John. Oh, by the way, she's
165
00:10:10,790 --> 00:10:15,610
probably right. I do let Wendy walk all
over me. Hey, come on, John. Do not
166
00:10:15,610 --> 00:10:16,750
shortchange yourself.
167
00:10:17,670 --> 00:10:19,670
You let everyone walk all over you.
168
00:10:24,350 --> 00:10:25,950
Hey, John, how's your day going?
169
00:10:26,670 --> 00:10:28,510
Well, my first time at Chit Chat.
170
00:10:28,830 --> 00:10:30,270
Do you have a tie I can borrow?
171
00:10:30,990 --> 00:10:32,310
I'm sorry, just the one I have on.
172
00:10:32,930 --> 00:10:33,930
Oh.
173
00:10:34,590 --> 00:10:35,590
Oh.
174
00:10:35,830 --> 00:10:36,990
Well, what the hell, I'll take it.
175
00:10:38,450 --> 00:10:39,450
All right.
176
00:10:39,830 --> 00:10:40,830
Here.
177
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What do you need it for?
178
00:10:41,930 --> 00:10:45,670
Oh, they're going to announce Teacher of
the Year in a little while, and I just
179
00:10:45,670 --> 00:10:47,710
thought I should dress up for my
acceptance speech.
180
00:10:47,930 --> 00:10:51,710
Oh. After all, I'm going to be a role
model for those kids now.
181
00:10:52,230 --> 00:10:53,250
They're going to look up to me.
182
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They're going to respect me.
183
00:10:55,710 --> 00:10:59,540
Okay. First, the bunny runs around the
hole. Then the bunny goes down.
184
00:11:00,440 --> 00:11:01,720
I got it. I got it.
185
00:11:03,180 --> 00:11:04,180
Mr.
186
00:11:04,580 --> 00:11:06,240
Lacey. Oh. All right. Look,
187
00:11:07,220 --> 00:11:10,400
I'm glad you're both here. The students
just voted for the Teacher of the Year
188
00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:13,260
Award, and you two tied for first place.
189
00:11:14,160 --> 00:11:17,340
Really? We're having a runoff election
next week to decide the winner.
190
00:11:17,740 --> 00:11:18,840
Good luck to both of you.
191
00:11:19,860 --> 00:11:20,860
All right.
192
00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:22,240
We tied.
193
00:11:22,460 --> 00:11:23,460
I win.
194
00:11:25,290 --> 00:11:26,290
What are you talking about?
195
00:11:26,510 --> 00:11:30,870
Oh, come on, John. It's no contest. I
mean, look who I'm up against.
196
00:11:31,410 --> 00:11:33,730
Wait a minute. Are you saying... What
are you saying?
197
00:11:34,630 --> 00:11:36,350
Are you saying that I'm a doormat?
198
00:11:36,610 --> 00:11:38,250
You do have a way with words.
199
00:11:38,710 --> 00:11:42,690
Yeah, well, that's the old John Lacey.
From now on, you're looking at the new
200
00:11:42,690 --> 00:11:46,550
John Lacey. Oh, come on, John. You know
as well as I do you're not very good at
201
00:11:46,550 --> 00:11:47,550
going after what you want.
202
00:11:47,970 --> 00:11:50,130
Now, I wonder where I should hang that
plaque.
203
00:11:50,450 --> 00:11:52,610
Why don't you hang it right over there?
Because that baby's going to be mine.
204
00:11:53,100 --> 00:11:54,019
Give me back my tie.
205
00:11:54,020 --> 00:11:55,640
What? You heard me. Give me back my tie.
206
00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:57,360
Come on.
207
00:11:58,020 --> 00:12:00,940
John. My tie. I'm beginning to hear
bells ringing.
208
00:12:02,040 --> 00:12:03,040
Oh,
209
00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:06,000
hello, Wendy. I'm glad you called.
210
00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:10,660
John, the neck. Oh, you got the estimate
from the mechanic, huh? Yeah, that's
211
00:12:10,660 --> 00:12:14,400
nice. Well, how about this? I'm not
going to send you a check. No.
212
00:12:14,860 --> 00:12:17,260
Oh, the carburetor, too. The joke.
213
00:12:17,460 --> 00:12:21,540
Check the joke. Yeah, but if you can't
afford it, get into the car and fix it
214
00:12:21,540 --> 00:12:22,540
yourself.
215
00:12:24,500 --> 00:12:25,940
What are you staring at?
216
00:12:30,800 --> 00:12:37,620
All right, everybody, settle down,
217
00:12:37,740 --> 00:12:38,740
settle down.
218
00:12:39,260 --> 00:12:42,920
I hope you all read chapters one through
six of the Grapes of Wrath like you
219
00:12:42,920 --> 00:12:45,640
were supposed to because we're about to
have a pop quiz.
220
00:12:46,940 --> 00:12:51,300
I am well aware of the fact that I am up
for teacher of the year.
221
00:12:51,960 --> 00:12:54,000
and that this isn't something a fun
teacher would do.
222
00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:56,400
But I'm not going to pander to any one
of you.
223
00:12:56,780 --> 00:12:58,480
It's a nice haircut. I like it very
much.
224
00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:01,520
All right, I'll put your books under
your chairs.
225
00:13:06,020 --> 00:13:07,020
Hi,
226
00:13:08,600 --> 00:13:09,600
John.
227
00:13:09,900 --> 00:13:10,920
Hey, gang.
228
00:13:11,440 --> 00:13:12,440
Hey, gang.
229
00:13:12,720 --> 00:13:14,720
All right, what are you doing here? Just
take a minute.
230
00:13:15,720 --> 00:13:16,720
Okay, listen up.
231
00:13:17,240 --> 00:13:22,240
Everybody in my nutrition class will be
meeting today at... Pepe's Taco Hut.
232
00:13:24,340 --> 00:13:27,880
Pepe's Taco Hut. Yeah, I'm going to
teach him about the perils of junk food.
233
00:13:28,120 --> 00:13:31,900
By the way, the first 20 students there
get free nachos.
234
00:13:32,900 --> 00:13:37,340
Thank you. Thank you, Coach Cholesterol.
Now, if you don't mind, we're in the
235
00:13:37,340 --> 00:13:38,380
middle of a pop quiz.
236
00:13:38,780 --> 00:13:40,160
Ooh, another one?
237
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:42,120
You kids, hang in there.
238
00:13:42,320 --> 00:13:47,440
And just remember, Coach Derman here is
always rooting for you. That's Derman.
239
00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:49,580
Derman. Derman.
240
00:13:49,980 --> 00:13:50,980
Derman.
241
00:13:52,199 --> 00:13:55,200
Is that great? Who said I can't teach?
242
00:13:57,800 --> 00:13:59,280
Knock it off, please.
243
00:14:00,260 --> 00:14:01,820
Let's get back to the graves of wrath.
244
00:14:03,680 --> 00:14:04,680
First question.
245
00:14:05,180 --> 00:14:09,420
By what name did Steinbeck refer to
those poor people who migrated to
246
00:14:09,420 --> 00:14:10,420
California?
247
00:14:12,960 --> 00:14:19,340
Let me repeat the question. By what name
did Steinbeck refer to those poor
248
00:14:19,340 --> 00:14:23,680
people... From Oklahoma who migrated to
California.
249
00:14:25,340 --> 00:14:27,120
Okie dokie. You got that one?
250
00:14:30,740 --> 00:14:31,840
Next question.
251
00:14:32,720 --> 00:14:37,280
What was the main highway they took from
Oklahoma to California?
252
00:14:41,440 --> 00:14:45,300
And I'm not going to give you 66 minutes
to answer that question.
253
00:14:45,820 --> 00:14:47,780
No matter how hard you root.
254
00:14:53,580 --> 00:14:56,100
All right, I guess that's enough
questions for one quiz. All right.
255
00:14:57,300 --> 00:15:00,900
Lacey, Lacey, Lacey, Lacey, Lacey.
256
00:15:06,160 --> 00:15:07,160
Hi,
257
00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:12,000
everybody. Hi.
258
00:15:12,280 --> 00:15:15,440
Well, I did it and I feel wonderful.
259
00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:17,140
Anyone we know?
260
00:15:22,990 --> 00:15:26,970
handle the case against my ex -husband.
I'm going to make him squirm. I'm
261
00:15:26,970 --> 00:15:29,850
finally going to get even with that
slug. Good for you, Kate.
262
00:15:31,430 --> 00:15:33,930
Hi. Good evening, John.
263
00:15:34,470 --> 00:15:38,930
Kirk tells me you're being considered
the teacher of the year. Please, please.
264
00:15:38,930 --> 00:15:42,130
don't want to talk about that stupid
award. I don't want to think about it. I
265
00:15:42,130 --> 00:15:43,350
don't even want to hear it mentioned.
266
00:15:57,160 --> 00:15:58,160
I got a plan.
267
00:15:58,400 --> 00:16:02,480
If you want to win, you got to go with
what's in. You got to give the kids what
268
00:16:02,480 --> 00:16:03,480
they like.
269
00:16:03,820 --> 00:16:04,820
Noise.
270
00:16:06,140 --> 00:16:07,140
Get it, Ralphie.
271
00:16:32,750 --> 00:16:33,750
I caught the noise.
272
00:16:33,810 --> 00:16:36,910
Sorry, John, but if you stop too fast,
you can break your tongue.
273
00:16:38,490 --> 00:16:43,250
John, if you've already won Teacher of
the Year, why didn't you just say so?
274
00:16:43,450 --> 00:16:45,410
Because, Louise, I am ashamed of myself.
275
00:16:45,830 --> 00:16:49,790
I actually gave my students the answer
to a test. Oh, right, John.
276
00:16:50,030 --> 00:16:53,090
That was my fallback plan. Oh, Kirk, you
don't understand.
277
00:16:53,910 --> 00:16:54,910
I'm a teacher.
278
00:16:54,970 --> 00:16:58,190
I compromise myself for the sake of a
meaningless award.
279
00:16:58,960 --> 00:17:01,640
Oh, I've compromised myself for a lot
less.
280
00:17:05,619 --> 00:17:07,760
A turkey dinner and a sailor's hat.
281
00:17:08,579 --> 00:17:15,440
Now I'm just going to have to go in
there on Monday morning
282
00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:16,540
and refuse that award.
283
00:17:16,859 --> 00:17:18,300
How did I let myself get into this?
284
00:17:18,579 --> 00:17:22,680
I believe it had something to do with
not wanting to be a doormat.
285
00:17:23,040 --> 00:17:24,359
Yeah, it was that lawyer.
286
00:17:26,119 --> 00:17:28,860
How did I ever listen to that blood
-sucking legal leech?
287
00:17:29,060 --> 00:17:34,300
John, Barry's not a leech. He's a very
nice man who's helping me handle the
288
00:17:34,300 --> 00:17:35,420
against my ex -husband.
289
00:17:35,660 --> 00:17:39,880
Now, he's a leech. Oh, come on, Kate,
wise up. He's not interested in helping
290
00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:43,200
you. He's only interested in his fee.
Ah, well, that's where you're wrong,
291
00:17:43,260 --> 00:17:44,880
Barry hasn't charged me a dime.
292
00:17:45,120 --> 00:17:46,360
He said we're like family.
293
00:17:47,620 --> 00:17:48,620
Hello, everyone.
294
00:17:48,880 --> 00:17:49,659
Hi, Barry.
295
00:17:49,660 --> 00:17:52,520
Oh, Kate, just the person I wanted to
see.
296
00:17:53,940 --> 00:17:54,940
Am I interrupting?
297
00:17:55,260 --> 00:17:56,059
I knew.
298
00:17:56,060 --> 00:17:57,240
We haven't started yet.
299
00:17:57,620 --> 00:18:01,600
Good. Okay, I looked over your case, and
let me give you the upside.
300
00:18:01,960 --> 00:18:03,380
It looks pretty good.
301
00:18:04,280 --> 00:18:05,280
Hear that?
302
00:18:05,500 --> 00:18:06,640
Looks pretty good.
303
00:18:06,860 --> 00:18:09,480
Now, before you get too excited, let me
give you the downside.
304
00:18:10,200 --> 00:18:11,200
Hear that?
305
00:18:13,040 --> 00:18:14,040
There's a downside.
306
00:18:15,060 --> 00:18:20,580
Your ex has a pretty good lawyer. Okay,
a real shark. I've never beaten him in
307
00:18:20,580 --> 00:18:23,080
court, so I figure I'm due. How about
that?
308
00:18:24,790 --> 00:18:27,590
Do. But, of course, these things can
take time.
309
00:18:28,430 --> 00:18:29,730
Ask him how long.
310
00:18:30,590 --> 00:18:31,590
How long?
311
00:18:31,650 --> 00:18:33,870
Not long. Four, five years tops.
312
00:18:34,590 --> 00:18:39,350
Five years? That's an awful long time to
be tied up in court.
313
00:18:39,670 --> 00:18:41,670
That's a long time to be tied up
anywhere.
314
00:18:45,270 --> 00:18:46,350
Oh, excuse me.
315
00:18:57,160 --> 00:19:01,140
Not too risky. Her damn lawyer wanted me
to open all my books, reveal all my
316
00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:04,340
assets. The only thing I'd have left is
the mini mall in Orlando.
317
00:19:04,640 --> 00:19:05,840
It's in my girlfriend's name.
318
00:19:06,900 --> 00:19:09,000
So, Kate, what do you say?
319
00:19:09,240 --> 00:19:10,620
Want me to start filing the papers?
320
00:19:10,860 --> 00:19:14,100
Oh, I don't know, Barry. Five years is
an awful lot of time.
321
00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:16,580
It's not time spent, Kate.
322
00:19:17,060 --> 00:19:18,300
It's time invested.
323
00:19:19,480 --> 00:19:22,320
Invested in your integrity, your
dignity, your self -esteem.
324
00:19:22,680 --> 00:19:25,900
It's something you owe yourself. Now,
Kate, you're not going to be alone on
325
00:19:25,900 --> 00:19:29,100
this. I'm going to be right there
fighting side by side with you.
326
00:19:29,540 --> 00:19:30,540
What do you say?
327
00:19:32,020 --> 00:19:33,380
All right, I'll do it.
328
00:19:33,620 --> 00:19:37,260
Good. Well, we can get started as soon
as you write me a check for my $4 ,000
329
00:19:37,260 --> 00:19:40,040
retainer. $4 ,000?
330
00:19:41,320 --> 00:19:43,120
Barry, I don't have $4 ,000.
331
00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:44,960
Oh.
332
00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:47,760
Well, then we better forget the whole
thing.
333
00:19:48,700 --> 00:19:50,660
Yeah, you really didn't have much of a
case anyway.
334
00:19:51,920 --> 00:19:57,640
Barry, what kind of person are you?
How... How can you charge Kate $4 ,000
335
00:19:57,640 --> 00:20:00,100
you said you were going to treat her
like family?
336
00:20:00,320 --> 00:20:03,720
Hey, hey, hey. I am. That's the same
deal I gave my mother when I did her
337
00:20:03,720 --> 00:20:04,720
divorce.
338
00:20:04,880 --> 00:20:06,880
She must be one proud parent.
339
00:20:07,280 --> 00:20:09,180
Oh, so now we hear from Mr.
340
00:20:09,480 --> 00:20:15,440
Dormant. Wait a minute, Barry. That's
quite enough name -calling, you snake.
341
00:20:16,460 --> 00:20:19,140
John Lacey is a man of integrity.
342
00:20:19,360 --> 00:20:23,220
He's sensitive to the needs of others,
and he believes in being fair.
343
00:20:26,060 --> 00:20:27,060
Not a doormat.
344
00:20:27,420 --> 00:20:28,420
Yeah.
345
00:20:31,560 --> 00:20:34,840
Thank you, Louise, for reminding me
about something important that I'd
346
00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:35,840
forgotten.
347
00:20:36,480 --> 00:20:37,700
I am a fair man.
348
00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:40,200
I don't know what the hell I was worried
about.
349
00:20:41,400 --> 00:20:43,080
Excuse me, there's something I have to
take care of.
350
00:20:44,880 --> 00:20:48,840
You know, John and I are so much alike.
351
00:20:50,920 --> 00:20:54,420
someone says something nice about me, I
get so excited I have to go to the
352
00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:55,420
bathroom, too.
353
00:20:57,320 --> 00:21:01,260
Get me right down, Ginger!
354
00:21:04,600 --> 00:21:10,480
Now, Kate, listen, if my fee's a real
problem for you, maybe we could have a
355
00:21:10,480 --> 00:21:13,820
quiet little dinner sometime and work
out some other arrangements.
356
00:21:23,690 --> 00:21:25,370
Ask him about that mini mall in Orlando.
357
00:21:25,730 --> 00:21:28,130
Are you out of your mind? She's going to
kill me.
358
00:21:28,470 --> 00:21:31,070
I don't know why it's under his
girlfriend's name.
359
00:21:31,930 --> 00:21:35,630
Okay, Kate. Okay, that's it. Okay,
you've got two hours of consultation.
360
00:21:35,630 --> 00:21:36,529
my bill.
361
00:21:36,530 --> 00:21:37,530
Sue me.
362
00:21:38,150 --> 00:21:39,370
Just like my mother.
363
00:21:42,510 --> 00:21:46,170
I'm sorry, Wendy. Maybe I did come on a
little too strong about the car repairs.
364
00:21:46,330 --> 00:21:48,650
I would like to be fair.
365
00:21:49,230 --> 00:21:52,870
Yeah, I'll tell you what. I'll pay for
half of the transmission.
366
00:21:53,800 --> 00:21:54,940
I'll send you a check today.
367
00:21:56,340 --> 00:21:57,340
What?
368
00:21:58,020 --> 00:21:59,020
What about the plumbing?
369
00:22:00,260 --> 00:22:01,800
Well, why the hell should I have to pay
for that?
370
00:22:02,900 --> 00:22:06,600
Now, look, as I remember, I haven't set
foot in that house since you threw me
371
00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:07,600
out.
372
00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:12,200
Now, Wendy, Wendy, don't do this. Wendy,
Wendy, don't do this. I'm warning...
373
00:22:12,200 --> 00:22:13,200
Hi, son.
374
00:22:14,980 --> 00:22:16,000
Uh -huh.
375
00:22:16,540 --> 00:22:17,540
Uh -huh.
376
00:22:23,630 --> 00:22:27,890
Next, as an illegal alien seeks
sanctuary, Shannon works against the
377
00:22:27,890 --> 00:22:32,230
flush out a corrupt corporate executive
and prevent his client's deportation on
378
00:22:32,230 --> 00:22:36,810
the season finale of Shannon's Deal. And
Sunday night, Raymond Burr is Perry
379
00:22:36,810 --> 00:22:41,110
Mason in the case of The Silent Singer,
starring L .A. Law's Alan Rachin,
380
00:22:41,110 --> 00:22:44,450
Vanessa Williams, and Tim Reed. Sunday
night, only on NBC.
381
00:23:06,160 --> 00:23:08,140
these home videos have to be legitimate.
382
00:23:08,460 --> 00:23:10,980
So fake your fool as good as you can,
all right?
383
00:23:11,660 --> 00:23:14,260
Okay. Here's your banana peel.
384
00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:16,800
You ready?
385
00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:18,280
Okay.
386
00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:20,800
Action!
387
00:23:22,900 --> 00:23:23,900
Whoa!
388
00:23:29,700 --> 00:23:30,920
Guys! Guys!
389
00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:32,380
Guys! Guys!
390
00:23:33,020 --> 00:23:34,920
Come on! Jesus!
391
00:23:35,210 --> 00:23:38,110
Ralphie, my grandmother could fake a
better fall than that.
392
00:23:38,450 --> 00:23:43,030
See, Greg, I don't know about this. What
if I break my leg? All the better.
393
00:23:43,650 --> 00:23:50,270
Home Video Hygiene loves that stuff,
Ralphie. Last week, they gave $10 ,000
394
00:23:50,270 --> 00:23:54,690
this woman who sent in a videotape of
her husband getting shot in the stomach
395
00:23:54,690 --> 00:23:55,690
a cannon.
396
00:23:56,750 --> 00:23:59,090
That was on America's Most Wanted.
397
00:24:00,570 --> 00:24:02,070
What's the difference? It was still
funny.
398
00:24:04,140 --> 00:24:06,060
Come on, Ruffy. Let's try that fool
again, all right?
399
00:24:06,280 --> 00:24:10,400
Okay, and this time, think real.
400
00:24:12,860 --> 00:24:14,700
There you go. All right.
401
00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:17,920
Got your band, Peele? Yeah. All right.
402
00:24:18,440 --> 00:24:19,440
Are you ready?
403
00:24:19,460 --> 00:24:20,460
Yeah. Okay.
30738
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