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1
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Good evening.
2
00:00:08,560 --> 00:00:14,300
I'm Stephen Quincy Urkel. And I will be
your host tonight for a very special...
3
00:00:14,300 --> 00:00:14,900
For
4
00:00:14,900 --> 00:00:21,720
a
5
00:00:21,720 --> 00:00:26,700
very special Valentine's Day episode of
Family Matters.
6
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Ah, yes.
7
00:00:28,720 --> 00:00:31,080
February 14th. St.
8
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Valentine's Day.
9
00:00:32,700 --> 00:00:34,900
Le jour d 'amour.
10
00:00:35,400 --> 00:00:36,700
The day of love.
11
00:00:37,260 --> 00:00:42,380
All through the cold winter months, the
embers of romance lie smoldering in the
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00:00:42,380 --> 00:00:43,380
human heart.
13
00:00:43,900 --> 00:00:49,180
Valentine's Day fans, those flames
that... Now
14
00:00:49,180 --> 00:00:55,940
that's what you call a smoking
15
00:00:55,940 --> 00:00:56,940
jacket.
16
00:00:59,220 --> 00:01:01,600
Luckily, I'm wearing my asbestos boxers.
17
00:01:03,180 --> 00:01:08,890
Anywho, tonight we're going... to
present three phases of love first love
18
00:01:08,890 --> 00:01:13,370
love and lasting love there's another
phase begging for love but the less said
19
00:01:13,370 --> 00:01:14,370
about that the better
20
00:01:53,800 --> 00:01:55,920
Celebrate the emotional peaks and
valleys of love.
21
00:01:56,660 --> 00:01:59,340
Sit back and snuggle up with your
sweetie.
22
00:02:03,660 --> 00:02:05,620
And enjoy first love.
23
00:02:10,860 --> 00:02:14,680
Laura, when Stefan sees that new outfit,
girl, you are going to have to roll up
24
00:02:14,680 --> 00:02:15,680
his tongue.
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00:02:16,060 --> 00:02:19,300
I'm going to try it on again and make
sure it's still fixed. You tried it on
26
00:02:19,300 --> 00:02:20,300
the store.
27
00:02:20,440 --> 00:02:22,080
Yeah, but I had a corndog since then.
28
00:02:23,780 --> 00:02:24,780
Kelsey, you coming?
29
00:02:24,980 --> 00:02:26,060
No, I just had it.
30
00:02:26,460 --> 00:02:28,400
There's some sodas in the fridge. Help
yourself, okay?
31
00:02:28,920 --> 00:02:29,920
Thanks.
32
00:02:40,340 --> 00:02:41,360
Hi, who are you?
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00:02:42,920 --> 00:02:46,720
I'm... I'm... It starts with an R.
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Richie, that's it.
35
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I'm Kelsey Webster, Max's niece.
36
00:02:53,370 --> 00:02:54,370
Hi.
37
00:02:54,850 --> 00:02:55,850
I'm Richie.
38
00:02:56,170 --> 00:02:58,250
Yeah, I know. It starts with an R,
right?
39
00:02:58,950 --> 00:02:59,950
Right.
40
00:03:09,150 --> 00:03:11,030
Well, hello there, my newbie princess.
41
00:03:12,210 --> 00:03:13,210
Who's this?
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00:03:13,490 --> 00:03:16,290
I have never seen that kid before in my
life.
43
00:03:17,850 --> 00:03:19,810
Baby, I'm 3J.
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00:03:21,230 --> 00:03:24,050
You gotta tell me who you are before I
bust.
45
00:03:25,710 --> 00:03:26,950
I'm Kelsey Webster.
46
00:03:27,690 --> 00:03:29,330
Kelsey, why are we engaged?
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00:03:30,070 --> 00:03:31,070
Probably because we're nine.
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00:03:32,770 --> 00:03:35,410
Uh, PJ, I need to talk to you.
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00:03:36,110 --> 00:03:39,010
Later. I just met the girl of my dreams.
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00:03:39,510 --> 00:03:40,510
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
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00:03:40,710 --> 00:03:41,710
She's my girl.
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00:03:42,190 --> 00:03:44,230
Excuse me, I'm nobody's girl.
53
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Yet.
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00:03:47,570 --> 00:03:49,050
Kelsey? Yes?
55
00:03:52,010 --> 00:03:58,390
valentine's day and uh you know will you
uh be like my valentine and stuff
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00:03:58,390 --> 00:04:04,290
oh that's so sweet man your rap is weak
57
00:05:18,739 --> 00:05:21,420
Sugar. Oh, honey, honey.
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00:05:23,560 --> 00:05:26,140
You are my candy girl.
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00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:30,000
And you got me wanting you.
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00:05:32,620 --> 00:05:33,620
Honey.
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00:05:35,300 --> 00:05:37,060
Oh, sugar, sugar.
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00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:42,200
You are my candy girl.
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00:05:42,840 --> 00:05:44,320
And you got me.
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00:05:59,920 --> 00:06:03,080
Why don't you just sing the Barney song?
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00:06:05,720 --> 00:06:09,480
That was mean, 3J.
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00:06:11,040 --> 00:06:12,220
You okay?
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00:06:17,460 --> 00:06:20,320
Yeah. I guess I picked a dumb song.
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00:06:21,160 --> 00:06:24,560
Although, in my defense, there was a
very limited tape selection.
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00:06:25,940 --> 00:06:27,220
3J's a good dancer, huh?
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00:06:28,320 --> 00:06:32,260
Yeah. Unlike me, he's got some smooth
moves.
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00:06:33,800 --> 00:06:36,160
Yeah, maybe a little too smooth.
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00:06:38,080 --> 00:06:39,080
What do you mean?
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00:06:40,480 --> 00:06:42,280
I like boys who mean what they say.
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00:06:43,020 --> 00:06:44,520
Not boys who say mean things.
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00:06:48,920 --> 00:06:53,340
You know, if you were to ask me to be in
a Valentine again, I bet I'd say yes.
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00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:55,920
Wow. Hey, you would?
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00:06:56,440 --> 00:06:57,440
Sure.
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00:06:59,630 --> 00:07:01,130
But you do have to ask.
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00:07:01,710 --> 00:07:02,710
Oh, yeah.
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00:07:03,450 --> 00:07:05,910
Kelsey, will you be my Valentine?
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00:07:06,670 --> 00:07:07,670
I'd love to.
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00:07:19,270 --> 00:07:21,970
Wasn't that sweet?
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It's like that age -old saying, words
from the heart speak louder. than flashy
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00:07:29,170 --> 00:07:30,870
jive talk while doing the Tootsie Roll.
85
00:07:35,630 --> 00:07:38,330
Now, on to our second vignette.
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00:07:38,710 --> 00:07:42,910
Is Eddie and Greta's relationship strong
enough to survive a visit from an old
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00:07:42,910 --> 00:07:47,070
flame? If it is, then they have true
love.
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00:07:57,100 --> 00:07:58,840
Greta, you've done it again. Done what?
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00:07:59,340 --> 00:08:02,320
You are the most beautiful girl in the
whole world.
90
00:08:03,060 --> 00:08:06,080
You should have seen how I looked this
morning when I first woke up.
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00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:09,480
My cereal snapped, crackled, and
screamed.
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00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:42,640
I'm Greta, and I'm Eddie's real good,
new, and still current
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00:08:42,640 --> 00:08:43,640
girlfriend.
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00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:49,000
Well, Onesha, you remember my sister,
Laura.
95
00:08:49,220 --> 00:08:50,220
Hey, Laura.
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00:08:50,300 --> 00:08:52,700
And that's my homeboy. Oh, that's
Stefan.
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00:08:52,980 --> 00:08:54,840
Everybody knows Stefan.
98
00:09:13,610 --> 00:09:15,810
You kidding. It was a hot and heavy
thing.
99
00:09:16,170 --> 00:09:17,170
Oh, really?
100
00:09:17,450 --> 00:09:18,990
Tell me everything.
101
00:09:19,950 --> 00:09:23,750
It might have been a thing, but it
wasn't a thing.
102
00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:29,150
I should have never broken up with you.
I must have been crazy.
103
00:09:29,790 --> 00:09:31,090
No, you did the right thing.
104
00:09:32,570 --> 00:09:34,230
Can we just order now, please?
105
00:09:34,510 --> 00:09:36,990
Four cappuccinos. That'll be all. Thank
you.
106
00:09:38,030 --> 00:09:39,030
Okay.
107
00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:43,540
You never told me about her.
108
00:09:43,880 --> 00:09:48,520
Well, baby, there's nothing to tell.
It's ancient history. Look, I don't
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00:09:48,520 --> 00:09:51,320
about her anymore, and I'm sure that she
does not think about me.
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00:09:51,540 --> 00:09:53,480
Eddie, I've been thinking about you.
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00:09:55,220 --> 00:10:00,700
And now here you are in my first night
on the job and on Valentine's Day.
112
00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:08,680
Fate, destiny, a sign maybe we should
get back together. Oh, no, no, no, no,
113
00:10:12,840 --> 00:10:15,880
You see, this is fate.
114
00:10:16,580 --> 00:10:18,900
And this is destiny.
115
00:10:19,280 --> 00:10:23,100
And there is a sign that you should get
your hoochie butt out of here.
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00:10:27,920 --> 00:10:28,380
Here's
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00:10:28,380 --> 00:10:38,440
my
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00:10:38,440 --> 00:10:39,440
number, Eddie.
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00:10:40,710 --> 00:10:42,930
Call me when you ditch Cruella de Vil.
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00:10:44,750 --> 00:10:45,750
Well,
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00:10:48,730 --> 00:10:52,190
you don't want to do that. Yeah, yeah,
yeah, look, look, look. Let's just
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00:10:52,190 --> 00:10:56,690
everybody relax, calm down, and enjoy
the rest of the evening.
123
00:10:56,930 --> 00:10:58,350
No, no, see, that's a good idea.
124
00:10:58,710 --> 00:11:00,890
I'm with that. All right, all right.
125
00:11:02,750 --> 00:11:06,730
What did you just do?
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00:11:08,170 --> 00:11:09,170
Nothing.
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00:11:09,710 --> 00:11:11,110
put her number in your pocket.
128
00:11:12,470 --> 00:11:17,230
Oh, how about that?
129
00:11:18,630 --> 00:11:21,110
Oh, I don't want this.
130
00:11:21,350 --> 00:11:22,490
Why do I want this?
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00:11:23,190 --> 00:11:25,830
Stefan, you want this? No, man, I don't
want that.
132
00:11:29,010 --> 00:11:33,150
You know, Eddie, if you really cared
about me, you would have done this.
133
00:11:35,630 --> 00:11:37,870
Okay, it's ripped up now. It's over.
134
00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:42,240
feelings for this girl, don't you? No,
it's not over.
135
00:11:45,200 --> 00:11:49,420
Oh, Laura, that might be a good time to,
uh... Check out the cappuccino bar?
136
00:11:49,640 --> 00:11:53,120
Well, actually, I was gonna suggest we
go to the car and make out, but
137
00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:54,120
cappuccino's cool.
138
00:11:58,720 --> 00:12:00,800
Look, baby, look. This is nuts.
139
00:12:01,980 --> 00:12:04,740
Onesha's the one who gave me her number
and kissed me.
140
00:12:04,940 --> 00:12:06,860
You should've told her to get lost,
Eddie.
141
00:12:07,210 --> 00:12:11,910
And the fact that you didn't show
disrespect to me. Oh, but Greta. Just
142
00:12:11,910 --> 00:12:12,910
talk to me.
143
00:12:43,290 --> 00:12:44,750
Happy Valentine's Day, everyone.
144
00:12:46,150 --> 00:12:52,230
I'm with an incredibly special young
lady this evening, and I wanted to take
145
00:12:52,230 --> 00:12:59,030
this opportunity to say to her and
everyone else in this room that, well,
146
00:12:59,150 --> 00:13:03,110
maybe you're the only girl for me. Check
this out. Tell me, do you remember
147
00:13:03,110 --> 00:13:09,590
this? It was the month of August on a
sunny summer day.
148
00:13:23,760 --> 00:13:30,260
I wanted to know you a little bit more
because you know you are heavenly, just
149
00:13:30,260 --> 00:13:36,880
like a star. I want to be anywhere you
are.
150
00:13:37,420 --> 00:13:43,760
Did you happen to notice that my
boyfriend is up on stage singing a love
151
00:13:43,760 --> 00:13:46,160
especially wrote for me?
152
00:13:47,180 --> 00:13:48,180
Yeah,
153
00:13:48,560 --> 00:13:49,560
I noticed.
154
00:13:59,180 --> 00:14:01,740
First heard you talk to me, baby.
155
00:14:03,440 --> 00:14:06,340
When I first heard you talk to me.
156
00:14:34,090 --> 00:14:38,930
relationship lasts that long, sometimes
a man can take his wife for granted.
157
00:15:19,820 --> 00:15:22,100
Oh, happy Valentine's Day to you, too.
158
00:15:24,060 --> 00:15:27,180
Did you see the gift I left for you?
Right next to all the stuff I got for
159
00:15:27,420 --> 00:15:28,299
Oh,
160
00:15:28,300 --> 00:15:29,300
right.
161
00:15:30,680 --> 00:15:31,680
Let's see.
162
00:15:31,940 --> 00:15:32,940
Candy burger.
163
00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:38,240
Candy missy.
164
00:15:40,660 --> 00:15:45,760
There was an E. coli scale into
chocolate, and I tasted a few to make
165
00:15:45,760 --> 00:15:46,760
box was safe.
166
00:15:48,620 --> 00:15:50,260
You're a brave man, Carl.
167
00:15:50,500 --> 00:15:53,240
Hey, I am here for you, baby.
168
00:15:53,900 --> 00:15:56,980
These flowers are not fresh.
169
00:15:59,440 --> 00:16:04,300
Well, yeah, you see, I probably had the
heat up on high in the car and they
170
00:16:04,300 --> 00:16:06,780
wilted, but read the card, read the
card.
171
00:16:12,620 --> 00:16:15,240
For my wife on Valentine's Day.
172
00:16:18,410 --> 00:16:25,030
My love is forever, time without end.
For you are my wife, my lover, my very
173
00:16:25,030 --> 00:16:26,030
best friend.
174
00:16:27,310 --> 00:16:30,330
Oh, Carl, this is beautiful.
175
00:16:30,810 --> 00:16:34,150
Hey, and I mean every word, sweetheart.
176
00:16:34,610 --> 00:16:37,670
And you meant every word eight years
ago.
177
00:16:38,430 --> 00:16:45,030
Huh? Carl, I saved every card you give
me. Well, I know that. And I
178
00:16:45,030 --> 00:16:47,970
always mark down the year that you gave
it to me.
179
00:16:48,350 --> 00:16:49,350
didn't know that.
180
00:16:51,150 --> 00:16:55,570
Carl, you snuck into my card box and
gave me an old card I already had,
181
00:16:55,570 --> 00:16:56,570
you?
182
00:16:57,230 --> 00:16:58,230
Might have.
183
00:17:00,410 --> 00:17:02,850
But, honey, let's put a positive spin on
this.
184
00:17:03,270 --> 00:17:05,290
Let's call it recycling.
185
00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:07,150
No, Carl.
186
00:17:07,310 --> 00:17:10,630
Let's call it what it really is, cheap
and lazy.
187
00:17:10,910 --> 00:17:14,630
Oh, well, now, Harriet, that's a bit
harsh.
188
00:17:15,310 --> 00:17:16,310
Harsh?
189
00:17:17,130 --> 00:17:21,930
Carl, you give me a half -eaten box of
candy, some sorry -looking roses that
190
00:17:21,930 --> 00:17:27,030
three hours away from potpourri, and to
top it all off, you give me an old card
191
00:17:27,030 --> 00:17:28,230
I already had.
192
00:17:31,630 --> 00:17:32,910
Can I open my present now?
193
00:17:38,810 --> 00:17:39,810
Thanks.
194
00:17:41,270 --> 00:17:42,270
Nice wrapping.
195
00:17:57,510 --> 00:18:00,290
Oh, honey, this is beautiful.
196
00:18:01,410 --> 00:18:03,450
Those are Eddie and Laura's baby
bracelets.
197
00:18:04,330 --> 00:18:06,910
I had them gold -plated and made into a
keychain.
198
00:18:08,290 --> 00:18:10,190
You put a lot of thought and effort into
this.
199
00:18:10,730 --> 00:18:11,730
Yes, I did.
200
00:18:12,450 --> 00:18:14,810
Because you're worth it, Carl.
201
00:18:36,650 --> 00:18:37,650
Harriet?
202
00:18:44,730 --> 00:18:45,730
What's going on?
203
00:18:49,670 --> 00:18:55,710
Well, sweetheart, I would like to
apologize for my thoughtlessness.
204
00:18:56,990 --> 00:18:59,550
My taking you for granted was
inexcusable.
205
00:19:00,590 --> 00:19:01,670
Would you forgive me?
206
00:19:03,110 --> 00:19:04,170
I don't know, Carl.
207
00:19:04,830 --> 00:19:05,970
It really hurt me.
208
00:19:06,790 --> 00:19:11,290
Well, I realized that, sweetheart, and
I'd like to make it up to you.
209
00:19:13,350 --> 00:19:20,290
So... Well, I wanted to buy you another
box of candy, but all the stores were
210
00:19:20,290 --> 00:19:21,290
closed.
211
00:19:21,910 --> 00:19:23,650
So I baked you these instead.
212
00:19:26,350 --> 00:19:27,610
I'm sure they're delicious.
213
00:19:28,090 --> 00:19:31,010
And the only flower store that was open
was in Rockford.
214
00:19:32,590 --> 00:19:36,590
So I drove all the way to get you these.
215
00:19:40,630 --> 00:19:43,510
And these.
216
00:19:45,330 --> 00:19:46,750
And these.
217
00:20:01,070 --> 00:20:02,430
You drove all the way to Rockford?
218
00:20:02,730 --> 00:20:04,450
Mm -hmm. Had to pay a toll both ways.
219
00:20:05,730 --> 00:20:10,210
Oh, sweetheart, and, uh, I made you this
card here.
220
00:20:11,270 --> 00:20:16,130
Ritchie and 3J loaned me the
construction paper, and I cut out the
221
00:20:16,130 --> 00:20:18,290
of myself and drew the little cupid.
222
00:20:19,150 --> 00:20:21,250
Oh, I also went ahead and put the date
on the back.
223
00:20:24,490 --> 00:20:25,910
I love it, Carl.
224
00:20:26,530 --> 00:20:28,050
And I love you, Mrs. Kinsley.
225
00:20:29,430 --> 00:20:30,430
And I forgive you.
16736
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