Original subtitles

Bill.

Bill.

Bill.

Tax refund?

That figure's wrong address.

Hey, Harriet.

Oh.

Tough day?

Yeah, I finally caught up with that computer thief.

He's been using his boss's name to order extra equipment.

Well, at least you finally caught him. Oh, by the way, how's that new assistant

working out?

Not so good.

He's a computer thief.

I heard someone come in. I thought it might be my date.

Date?

Well, come on then. Sit down and tell us about it.

So, who's your date?

Fletcher Thomas.

Ooh, he's handsome.

Honey, he is a major hook.

He's taking me out to dinner, and then we're going dancing. And after that?

Well, now, there may not be any after that.

When men mumble with mamas, they drop like flies.

Uh -oh. Please, don't mention it to Carl.

Every time I get interested in a man, Carl has a hissy fit.

Hello, Estelle.

You look absolutely beautiful.

Fletcher, if you're trying to sweet -talk me, good start.

A rose for a rose. Oh.

Don't wait up, honey.

It's a rare condition this day and age to read any good news on the newspaper

page. Love and tradition of the grand design.

Some people say it's even harder to find.

Well, there must be some magic glue inside these gentle walls.

All I see is a tower of dreams.

Real love bursting out of every scene.

We're going to fill our house with happiness.

But we'll smother the blues with deadness.

There's room for you, room for me, for gentle hearts and opportunity.

It's the bigger love of the family.

Night, Mom.

Night. Have a great... Great color.

Uh -huh.

Gotta study.

Yep. School dance next week at night.

School dance?

Yeah, Sadie Hawkins Day. Girls ask boys.

I'm going to ask Greg Hudson.

Have I met him? No.

But picture a Greek guy with his own moped.

Well, just make sure Mr. Apollo has you home before 11.

11? When are you going to realize I'm becoming a mature woman?

When you can get through breakfast without spitting Cheerios at your

Hey, is that that new nightgown I bought you?

Yes. Let me see you model it.

What do you want?

Only to serve you, m 'lady.

What do you

want? Oh, I thought you might

like to ask me to the Sadie Hawkins Day dance.

Steve, listen.

I was gonna wait for you to call. Then I realized that would be like waiting for

Dan Quayle to appear on Jeopardy.

you and Greg have a good time.

Tell you what, you go ahead and ask Greg to eat their little cricket Hudson.

But if he turns you down, a decision which could only be the result of

inbreeding, I'll be there waiting with the old horse trailer.

Deal? Deal.

Hey, what you gonna do, Willie? I'm gonna trash Urquhart's locker.

Why you gonna do that, Willie?

Because it's Tuesday.

Again?

Not me, potato face.

small talk. Would you like to go with me to the city hall because they dance?

I can't, Laura.

I mean, I'd like to, but I... No, you don't have to explain. I understand.

No, no, no, no. Wait, you don't understand.

Good grief, man.

Have you just taken leave of your senses?

You were just asked out by the most wonderful woman in the world.

Would you keep your voice down?

I'd like to go with Laura, but Willie won't let me.

Buckner?

The locker looter?

Yeah. He told Laura he wanted her to ask him to the dance. She said no.

That's my feisty filly. Yeah. He really is getting back at her. He put out word

that any guy who goes to the dance with Laura will end up breathing through his

ears.

He wants you to go to the dance alone?

Worse. He wants you to go with you.

You are dead meat.

both want to finish yeah i want you i want you no

saturday silver's gym in the ring with proper supervision i'll be there

coach but i got 10 bucks says that urkel won't show

through with this.

a fighting style.

Steve.

Steve.

Steve.

Huh? That's not a fighting style.

That's a plea for help.

Don't tease me, Carl.

All right, I'll try.

But, Steve, I strongly suggest that you consider a different strategy.

Instead of trying to hit your opponent, run from him.

Ah, sort of like an Urkel Shuffle. Right.

Boxer's most important punch is the jab.

It's a quick, straight blow to your opponent's face.

Now, let's see your jab.

How's that?

Fine, fine.

Just next time, wait till I'm ready.

Sorry, big guy.

Now, another good punch is the left hook.

The arm travels in a circular motion, hopefully connecting with your

chin. And it's a real good punch to have.

Especially if the other guy's just using his jab.

Sorry, reflex.

Another good punch to have is the right cross.

It's a power move.

A knock you out punch.

Now when you see an opening, your right hand comes across your left hand with

all your weight behind it. Like this.

You don't want to overuse your right cross. You want to save that for the

perfect moment.

Most of the time, you'll be relying on your left hook and your jab.

That's enough for the day, Steve.

Still, when we finished that mumbo and everybody applauded, I was so proud, I

thought I'd bust a gun.

Be honest, Fletcher. They applauded because you split your pants.

Oh, Fletcher, I had a wonderful time.

Me too.

Good night.

Good night.

Stella's son. She told me an awful lot about you.

Oh, really?

That's funny.

She hasn't mentioned a thing about you.

By the way, I'm a cop.

That's nice.

Well, good night again, Estelle. Good night, Fletcher. And thanks again for a

wonderful, lovely evening. The pleasure was all mine.

Pleasure? What pleasure?

Don't start with me, Carl.

Mama, you were kissing that man.

So?

Well, you're my mother.

Moms aren't supposed to do that stuff.

If mothers didn't do that stuff, you wouldn't be here.

But, but... I think I'm getting a headache.

Carl, honey.

Fletcher's a good man.

He enjoys my company and I enjoy his.

That's good, Mama. Really good.

I'm happy for you.

Bless you, sweetheart.

Fletcher Thomas.

You sure that's his real name?

Yeah.

I'll run a make on him.

Really touched.

You want me to go to the dance with you? I'd like to.

Thanks, Greg, but I've decided to go with my champion.

Steve, will you go with me to the Sadie Hawkins Day Dance?