Original subtitles

Now the world don't move to the beat of just one drum. What might be right for

you may not be right for some. A man is born, he's a man of need.

Then along come two, they got nothing but the genes. But they got different

strokes to take, different strokes to take, different strokes to move the

Everybody's got a special kind of story.

Everybody finds a way to shine.

It don't matter that you got not a lot. So what? I'll have theirs and you'll

have yours and I'll have mine.

And together we'll be fine. Because it takes different strokes to move the

world. Yes, it does. It takes different strokes to move the world.

Mrs. Garrett, where are Kimberly and Arnold? Why aren't they at breakfast?

I better go see if they're all right.

Just lean on me, little sister.

I'll help you down. You won't crush me. I got muscles nobody knows about.

Arnold, I'm all right.

Just think of me as a St. Bernard who's come to your rescue.

You mean a chihuahua.

Kimberly, what is the matter?

Don't worry, Mr. D. She ain't got a hangover.

I'm okay, Daddy. I'm just tired. I was up practically all night long studying.

You sure must have been studying hard.

Because it looked like all the wheels came out your head.

Well, I'll fix you some breakfast and you'll feel better, Kimberly. Thank you.

Now, why were you studying so hard?

Oh, our new headmaster at school was driving us all up the wall with the

play. The croc is the worst.

The croc?

Well, his name is Mr. Crocker, but all the girls call him the croc.

Well, what's in a name?

I don't know what's in a name, but I know what's in a croc.

schoolwork at night because during the day I'm busy rehearsing in the play and

I'm also in charge of all the costumes and I don't know how I'm going to have

them ready by tomorrow night. It's impossible.

Well, isn't the house mother at the school supposed to be helping you?

Eh, she got in an argument with the croc and quit.

Well, I'm pretty handy with a needle and thread. I'd be glad to help you out.

Yeah, that's nothing that Gary can't do. She's perfect.

She's Superman in a girl.

for the rest of the day. Please, Daddy.

All right, go ahead, Mrs. Garrett.

We men can handle everything here.

Thanks, Mr. Drummond. I'll get changed.

And remember, men, this time when you wash the dishes, use soap, not floor

Well, what are you going to do about food, Miss D?

Don't worry. I'll cook up something for dinner. I repeat, what are we going to

do about food, Mr. Drummond? Are you guys casting aspersions at my cooking

ability? I don't know what it means, but if it'll stop, you can cook it. I'm

casting.

All right. Now, just try this out on your stomach.

How would you like a nice, thick, juicy steak, golden brown French fried onion

rings, a wonderful mixed vegetable medley, coconut cake with ice cream for

dessert? Would you like that? Oh, would we ever. We love it.

So would I.

We're going to go out to eat.

You know, Kimberly, when I was a little girl, my dream was to go to

a private school just like this.

Oh, it's so beautiful, peaceful.

up and you'll blow up

I know I don't.

Good. I shouldn't eat them anyway.

Zip.

I'm going to go get my costume. I'll be right down.

Hey, girls.

Shouldn't you be working on your costumes instead of doing whatever it

were doing?

Can't help you there.

Blue blood would never mix with yours.

Was I just insulted?

Blair, it's too bad we're not doing Cinderella.

You could have played both of the Nasty Sisters.

have to be fitted for a small device.

In my home, housekeepers know their place.

In my home, so do little girls.

Why aren't you rehearsing my play?

Oh, and speaking of my play, I want to put a stop to the ridiculous rumor

circulating.

It's being suggested that I have ripped off Mr. William Shakespeare.

Well, I have not ripped him off.

I rewrote his play to eliminate Mr. Shakespeare's obvious weaknesses.

Like his obviously bad title, for instance, A Midsummer Night's Dream.

Ha! My title is A Mid -Autumn Day's Fantasy.

Oh, your title is much more melodic, Mr. Crocker. Thank you, Blair.

Thank you, Blair.

Now, just to erase any doubt as to my own personal integrity, I intend to give

full credit where credit is due. The program will read, A Mid -Autumn Day's

Fantasy.

Conceived, written, produced, and directed by Harold J. Crocker.

From a notion by William Shakespeare.

See, when it comes to fairness, girls, I... I smell smoke.

Now, which one of you girls is smoking?

Is it you?

Is it you?

Is it you?

Is it you?

You're not a girl.

Who are you?

Mr. Crocker?

That's Mrs. Garrett. She's going to be helping me with the costumes.

Then she's the one who's smoking.

What are you going to do?

Expel me?

But, Mrs. Garrett, you don't smoke cigarettes.

Well, Kimberly, there are a lot of closet smokers. Who knows?

I might smoke anything that'll burn.

Cigars, pipes, bamboo, rope. You smoke bamboo?

Weird lady.

You didn't have to cover for me.

I really don't care if the croc nailed me.

You keep smoking, the mortician's going to nail you.

Can't you ever get off skates? I mean, you're 12 years old. Why don't you learn

how to walk?

Mrs. Garrett, we better get started on the costumes. We can work on them in the

house mother's room. It's right over here.

Okay, honey.

Lead the way, and I'll follow.

Mrs. Garrett, could you please take a look at my costume?

Sure, dear.

Nothing, if you plan on growing another arm.

We'll be up the creek.

Well, what are we waiting for? Hop to it, girls!

Gosh,

I love showbiz.

No

need to

cry, honey. I'll help you with your costume, too.

Is everything all right at home?

I have to drop out of school.

Drop out of school?

But why, honey?

My father lost his job, and he can't afford to keep me here.

Oh, I am sorry.

Even though this school looks kind of crazy, it's a terrific school.

I love it, and all my friends are here.

Don't cry, Nancy.

This morning, I was in the kitchen minding my own business. Kimberly had a

little problem, so I offered to help her. The next thing I know, I'm here in

this cuckoo's nest, laying with a frisbee and saying I smoke bamboo.

On top of that, while a poor little girl's heart is breaking, I'm supposed

sewing 400 costumes and looking for a frog named...

We just got to think of a way to keep Nancy in school.

It just wouldn't be the same without her.

What are we going to do?

I think it's something.

Hey, I got an idea. Why don't we get a loan from the bank?

How do we pay them back, Tootie?

I figured out how to get the money. You figure out how to pay them back.

The only way poor Nancy's going to stay in school is if a miracle happens.

And the only thing I know about miracles is one time when we were going to New

Jersey and it started to rain, we came to a bridge.

And the next day, we were so lucky.

Well, what's the miracle?

We didn't want to go to New Jersey in the first place.

Boy, I don't know what I'd do without Nancy.

She hadn't helped me study.

I'd have flunked English.

And she helped me with my algebra, too.

You know, Nancy, you could stay at this school if you could get yourself a

scholarship. My grades aren't good enough. They have to be straight A.

Well, other things are just as important as grades, Nancy. Like talent.

Kimberly told me you're a terrific actress.

Maybe you could get a scholarship for that.

They don't have scholarships in dramatic art.

Well, maybe you could get Mr. Crocker to start one.

Get the crock to spend extra money?

A man who recycles his dental floss?

Nancy, what are you doing here?

Oh, I just brought Mrs. Garrett my costume.

Get back to the rehearsal.

Make it live.

Why aren't these costumes finished, Mrs. Garrett?

Can't you go any faster?

It's only a sewing machine. If it could go any faster, I'd enter it in the Indy

500.

I'll just make you with a few costumes you have finished.

Oh, Mr. Crocker, I read your play.

Well, lucky you.

It was incredible.

Did it make you laugh a lot?

Oh, did I laugh?

Did I laugh? Then did you cry?

Oh, did I cry? Oh, did I cry?

Then did you laugh again?

Did I laugh again?

Excellent taste, Mrs. Garrett. And so do you.

I must congratulate you. congratulate you on picking Nancy for the lead. That

girl has talent.

Oh, what a shame. She's going to have to drop out of school.

Not before my play tomorrow night.

No, at the end of the term.

Oh, it's all right, then.

What do you mean, it's all right?

Her parents can't afford to keep her here.

Well, don't worry about it. I'll just find a child whose parents can't afford

it. Why not just create a scholarship for her?

Scholarship? Bite your tongue.

I'm already over budget on these costumes as it is.

Mr. Crocker, you haven't a clue as to what's going on with your girls.

You don't care what they're doing or what's bothering them. You only care

yourself.

And as for your play, if Shakespeare were alive, he'd drop dead.

That's what you know, Mrs. Garrett.

is I have to show a profit to the trustees.

I may even have to do away with some of the luxuries around here.

Have you thought of putting in paid toilets?

Ridiculous, Mrs. Garrett.

Of course I have.

Attention, players.

Attention.

Let's get the show on the road, girls. Mr. Crocker, should we go into the

auditorium? No, we're going to rehearse in here today, Wendy.

I'm not Wendy.

Don't you recognize me?

It's Sue Ann. Oh, yes. I'm surprised he didn't recognize you.

All you have to do is look at the donkey's head and work your way

Take one, no one blam.

All right, girls, all right. Places, everybody, places. Let's go, places,

places, places.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I am too, kid. All right, kids, from the top.

Walk, walk.

All right, kids, from the top.

Quickly, quickly, places.

All right, here's your costume, honey.

Thanks, Mrs. Garrett.

Yep. Cheer up, honey.

All right, girls.

Magic time.

We're in the woods.

The forest primeval.

Trees.

More leaves.

Good. A fairy is sleeping.

Fairy in place, please.

Yes, sir, Mr. Cocker.

All right.

Excellent.

Beautiful. All right, now, everybody.

sleeps the fairy in the woods, green and airy. Oh, no. No, no, Nancy. You have

to be more animated.

More animated.

Concentrate on passionate, youthful recklessness, followed by stubborn

Then top it off with a little bit of seething dismay.

Sorry, Mr. Parker. I'm just not with it, I guess.

What do we have to do to get you with it, Nancy?

Give her a scholarship.

Do you mind, Mrs. Garrett?

All right, girls, now once again from the tippy -top.

Yes, sir.

Mr. Crocker, Mr.

Crocker, excuse me, Mr. Crocker, you have a phone call.

Must you interrupt me now at the time, Molly?

I'm sorry, but the... I told you never to interrupt a rehearsal. I don't care

who it is.

The head trustee's on the phone.

Unless it's him.

All right, girls, take it again from the top.

Mortley! Well, I guess we better get on with rehearsal.

Mrs. Garrett, how am I supposed to act passionate, youthful recklessness when

all I can think about is leaving school?

Honey, when I was a little girl, I was in a play, and on my way to the

auditorium, I fell off my bike. I broke my tooth and fell into a patch of poison

ivy. Oh, I itched. I hurt.

I was a mess.

But I went on.

And what happened?

My teacher said I was the best tree in the place.

Always do your best, Nancy. No matter what.

I'll try, Mrs. Garrett. Thank you.

Um... Kimberly, come out of the woods.

Doesn't your father know the head trustee of this school?

Sure. Daddy and Mr. Robinson are good friends.

Hmm.

I think I'll give your father a fast phone call about Mr.

Robinson. Are you cooking something up, Mrs. Garrett?

Of course, Kimberly.

Cooking is my specialty.

Mr.

Robinson, I...

Their performance is delightful. I enjoyed myself immensely. I was

terribly moved.

Tell me, Mrs. Garrett, now, from what you said, I get the impression that you

think very highly of Mr. Crocker. I can't tell you what I think of you.

Congratulations again, Crocker. You did wonders with those girls.

I mean, they were like professionals. Really?

Weren't they, Charlie? They certainly were, Philette. I am very impressed,

Crocker. Tell Charlie about your idea for a scholarship, Crocker.

Scholarship. Oh, you remember we were discussing it yesterday.

How you want to establish a dramatic scholarship.

Well, I happened to mention it to Mr. Drummond yesterday on the telephone.

Well, I never meant that. And I just happened to mention it to Charlie at

today. And the Croc, I mean, Mr. Crocker, wants the first

scholarship to go to Nancy.

Am I right, Mr. Crocker?

You've been right about everything up to this point.

I think that's a splendid idea. I don't think I'll have a bit of trouble selling

the other trustees on it. You know, I was an actor once myself.

Oh, really?

Yes, I was the best tree in the play.

So, Philip, why don't we find this lucky young girl and give her the good news?

Let's just do that. Fine.

Oh, here she is, right.

Mr. Crocker.

Yes? I must congratulate you.

You go to the top of my list.

Oh, really?

Which list?

Yes.

You guessed.

Crocker, Crocker, these wonderful girls have just come up with a splendid idea.

Oh, would you excuse us, Mrs... Garrett, certainly.

Tootie, Tootie, come here.

Since you and Miss Garrett hit it off so well, why don't you offer her that job

as house mother?

House mother?

Thanks for everything, Mrs. Garrett. I know this scholarship is all you're

doing. Did you really like it, Daddy? Did I do okay?

Oh, Kimberly, you were the daintiest fairy I have ever seen.

Yeah. Next to you, Tinkerbell was a glut.

Kimberly, you were wonderful.

Well,

the body is familiar, but I can't place the face.

Well, under the face, there's another face with chubby cheeks, short ears, and

no front teeth.

And both faces go with the same ring.

You look real cute, Arnold.

How did you know it was me?

Just a wild guess.

Why, Mrs. Garrett?

Mr. Robinson feels that, uh, that is, both of us are prepared to offer you a

here at the school. That is, if you're willing to give up your present job.

What you talking about, Mr. Robinson?

Yeah, what you talking about? I mean, uh... What are you talking about? Well,

the position of house mother is open.

Thank you, girls. I am

so honored. It's...

Wonderful to be wanted.

But I'm needed with my family. I have to get back with them.

Yeah, that's right. Miss Good ain't going nowhere. No, no one's taking Miss

from us. She ain't going nowhere.

nothing but the jeans but they got different strokes different strokes