Original subtitles

Something smells good.

It's your breakfast, your royal swellness.

Oh, oh, oh, oh.

Voila!

Two eggs over easy, bacon medium, hash browns avec onion with juice de la

All my favorite stuff. What's going on? Let's just say if you were to choose me

as your life mate...

This repast would be your future.

Guys, the most incredible thing happened.

Let me guess, let me guess, let me guess, let me guess, let me guess, let

guess. You met a guy.

Yes!

His name is

DeAndre Moore. I met him last week at the sizzle club, and we've gone out

every night since.

Well, why didn't you call me? Yeah, what's wrong with you, girl?

thing in case things fizzled out.

So tell us about DeAndre.

Well, he's a little older than me. Oh, that just means he's a man and not a

Get over here.

Girl, he is so fine. He owns his own business, drops a beamer, and spoils me

rotten. Girl,

I like him already.

And today, he gave me a one -week anniversary gift that is the absolute

Ask me what time it is. Oh, no, no. Let me, let me, let me, let me, let me.

What time is it? Time? I don't want to ask.

I cannot tell you what time it is.

Because the gold...

How was your day?

Ah. Oh, that's nice.

Are you hungry?

I see.

I'm sorry, Harriet, but I've been in a bad mood all day.

Do you know that I have to go to the White House and see the President of the

United States?

You poor baby. You'll have to cancel your lunch with the Pope.

You remember Charlie Carnelli? Oh, sure.

Well, he's being appointed.

special advisor to the president on crime policy. And they're honoring him

some big gala event.

Wow. I guess taking that job with the Justice Department really paid off for

Charlie. Ah, he just got lucky.

Sweetheart, he put eight drug lords behind bars and seized 47 kilos of

That a dog did all the work.

important people in my life to meet.

Laura, this is DeAndre.

Nice to meet you, DeAndre.

Charmed. I can see why you and Max are friends.

The fine do flock together.

Come in. Have a seat.

Hey.

Hey, girl. What you doing way over there? This ain't church.

So, uh, DeAndre, uh, Max tells me you own your own business.

I'm a big trader in the global economy.

Oh, what do you trade?

Electronics and yams.

I'm kidding about the yams.

He's so funny.

Excuse me, ladies.

Yo.

No.

So?

Man, go with the flow.

Listen, baby, um, I got to split.

Why? What's wrong?

Well, that was one of my associates. He screwed up. I got a few fires that, you

know, I got to put out.

Is there anything I can do to help?

No, there's... Well,

maybe there is.

Baby, can you drop a couple packages off for me tomorrow?

Packages?

Yams.

Yams.

No problem, DeAndre. Baby, you know something?

You and me, we make a good team.

Laura, Max was right about you, baby. You got it going on and on.

Thanks,

DeAndre.

not supposed to mean? It means that I like him.

If you really liked him, you'd both be going, ah, right now.

Well, um, the truth is, Mac, I think he's a little

slick.

What do you mean slick?

Well, not slick in a bad way.

Slick in a slippery way.

Then why can't you just be happy for me?

DeAndre's just not the kind of guy I would pick out for you.

Well, you didn't pick him, Laura. I did.

And if you can't understand what he means to me, then maybe you're not as

friend as I thought.

She's upset because I don't like her new boyfriend, DeAndre Moore.

Well, you got a lot of nerve talking about somebody else's boyfriend.

You going out with Steve Urkel.

Are you serious, Eddie?

Get a bad vibe from this guy.

Well, want to make a few calls, have him checked out?

Yeah. I don't want Max to get hurt.

Consider it done.

I really appreciate this, Eddie.

Hey, no problem.

I wash your back and you wash my laundry.

Thanks for helping me sleep.

Why didn't you get a porter to carry all these bags?

Wouldn't waste a dollar.

Gee, this is a tiny room.

I'll say.

agree that this is a very small room.

I guess it's time for me to go.

Yep.

You know, I'm not one for soppy goodbyes. Well, neither am I, so

I cherish you, Carl Winslow.

Come back to me, Steve.

Okay, Steve. See you later.

Excuse me.

I got to go wash up. Excuse me.

I'll hang up his bag. There you go.

and relax.

Steve?

Steve?

Are you all right?

Bishop Tutu?

Steve, you're not supposed to be on the train.

Huh?

Huh?

We're moving.

Excuse me. Excuse me.

Yes,

what is it?

We have a little problem here.

He's not a passenger.

Don't be silly. He's on board. The train is moving. He's a passenger.

But he doesn't have a ticket.

Oh, then he's not a passenger.

He's a criminal.

Maybe we can drop him off at the next stop.

This is an express train. No stops between here and Washington, D .C.

Not even any slow curves?

Nope.

Well, how much are the tickets?

$220.

Oh, well, I think I could swing that with a little help from you, Carl.

Well, how much do you need?

$220.

a compartment about two or three cars down this train is completely sold out

either he stays with you or he sleeps on the roof he's gonna need a blanket up

there oh okay he could stay with me i'll alert cnn

14 hours.

Hey, thanks, Carl, for lending me these boxers.

You're welcome.

They sure are roomy.

I can hold a three -ring circus in here.

Look, Steve, I'm very tired.

I have a very big day tomorrow.

I really would just like to get some sleep, okay?

Okay.

There's no room for me.

A little more.

A little more.

Breathe deep.

You vote me for that?

Well, at least you can sleep.

I'm having a little trouble nodding off.

Well, maybe if I sing you a lullaby, that'll help you drift off.

I don't think so. Oh, sure, it will. Now, come on. But I don't think... Oh,

on. Come on, come on. Move your feet. Move your feet.

Are you Joe?

Yeah. You must be DeAndre's new girl.

That's right. My name is Max.

No names, okay?

DeAndre asked me to give you this.

It's for DeAndre.

Good job, Eddie.

Max, we've got the coke dealer.

Oh, man, you must be crazy. I don't know what's in that package. The girl walked

up and handed it to me. Yeah, we saw. Let's see what's in here.

A white powdery stuff.

Let's go. You're under arrest.

Max, you're going to need to come, too. We're going to need a statement.

Come on, Max.

The underused me.

Oh, my God, Eddie. I'm a drug runner.

No, no, you're not, Max.

You had no idea what was going on.

It's okay.

All right.

Eddie.

Go pick up DeAndre. Yes, sir.

Steve, will you please stop sulking and come out of the bathroom?

You yelled at me and you called me a butthead.

Of all the things I've called you, the one that bothers you is butthead?

Yes, it was my nickname in preschool.

Well, I'm sorry. I didn't know that.

Now come out of there and sit down now, please.

Are you going to be nice?

Yes, I'll be nice.

Steve, I'm sorry.

I've just been on the funk all day ever since I found out that Charlie Corneli

was being named top cop.

Oh, the old green -eyed monster syndrome.

Well, I'm not jealous. I don't begrudge Charlie his success. I mean, he's a good

cop, and he earned his appointment.

And what is he?

About five years ago, I turned down the same job with the Justice Department

that got Charlie where he is today.

Taking syndrome.

Yeah. I think I made a big mistake.

Hmm.

I don't know, Carl.

Let's think this over.

If you'd have taken that job, you would have had to relocate to Washington, D

.C., right?

Well, that's right.

And that justice job, what was it anyway?

Well, it was mostly political.

You know, prime commissions, committee meetings, hobnobbing with Congress.

Let's face it, Carl.

You're no hobber of knobbers.

You're a man of action.

You walk the beat.

You drove a squad car.

And now, you're a captain at a very young age, commanding hundreds of men

women.

Oh.

So you think I made the right choice.

Well, you're respected by your co -workers, you're admired by your

and you're loved by all your friends.

like you made all the right choices in my book carl not only are you a top

cop you're the

Hello, Laura.

Hey, Max.

Come in. Have a seat.

I'm sorry.

Go ahead.

I'm sorry, Laura. I should have listened to you, Laura. You're my best friend

and a great judge of character.

DeAndre had me totally fooled.

Believe me, I wish I had been wrong about him.

Me too.

You know what?

This is a problem only two scoops of Haagen -Dazs can solve.

As fine as DeAndre was, I'm gonna need some hot fudge and some nuts on top.

I'll drive.

I'll buy.

I'll buy. I'll buy. All right.