All language subtitles for Family Matters s09e14 Crazy for You 2

Previously on Family Matter.

I've got a date with Liza.

I've got a date with Liza.

That date will never happen or my name
isn't Myra Boutros Boutros Monkhouse.

Oh, my!

When I saw you kissing Myra, I felt...
Well, I felt a little jealous.

So you're saying you'll still go out
with me? You bet.

This isn't over yet.

Oh. Oh.

Hey,

Steve. Oh, hey, my lovely.

And what lucky star has the pleasure of
your company today?

Spoo. Oh.

I bought a new dress for our date
tomorrow night.

Oh, really?

to be a surprise. You see the dress and
you pick me up.

Uh -uh.

I have taken the liberty of compiling a
list of 74 things we can do after

dinner. I have written every possible
thing two people can do on a date.

Well, we could go dancing.

75.

Well, we could go for a nice walk.

76.

Well, we could find someplace quiet and
sit and talk.

How do you come up with... with this
stuff.

Hey!

It's my favorite guy. Big guy. Hey,
Steve. I can sit with him later. Stop

Stop! Stop!

Sorry.

I'm just a little giddy.

Tonight is my big date with Laura.

Oh.

Excuse me.

For a moment there, I thought you said
you actually had a date with Laura.

I do have a date with Laura.

Well, wait a minute.

Aren't you going steady with Myra?

Nope. We broke up. Now I'm as free as a
bird.

Well, Steve, you better make sure that
it's completely over with Myra.

You know, I was going steady with
another woman when I met Harriet.

Really? Mm -hmm.

Her name was Georgia.

Hi, Harriet!

How are you, Harriet?

It's okay, Steve.

Harriet knows all about it, don't you,
sweetheart?

That's right.

What are we talking about, dear?

Oh, I was telling Steve about how I was
going steady with Georgia when I met

you. Oh, her.

So, you dumped another woman for
Harriet?

Yep. I was this close to proposing to
Georgia.

But when I saw Harriet, I knew that she
was the only woman for me. Right, baby?

Georgia had thick ankles and an
overbite.

You broke up with Georgia, right?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

She was very upset at first.

But years later, she broke my windshield
with a brick.

surprise.

Surprise?

You called me and ordered me to come
over here.

Oh, yeah.

Well, I was wondering.

Want a loaf?

My God, please.

I know, I know it's Laura you really
want.

But let me ask you one simple question.

What proof do you have that Laura's
really a woman?

Laughter.

You had no right what...

romantic evening with the most beautiful
woman in the world.

Well, is something wrong?

I keep thinking about that woman you
were seeing when I met you.

Who, Georgia?

Yeah, her.

I never realized until you mentioned it
today that you...

actually intended to propose to her.

Ancient history, baby. That was then.

This is now.

Well, now I want to talk about then.

All right. What about it?

Well, I'm curious.

Did you ever buy her a ring?

Uh... Mighta.

Carl, is it the same ring you gave me?

What kind of question is that?

One that needs an answer.

What was the question again?

Harriet, even if it was the same ring,
what difference would it make?

I mean, it's yours now, and it's been
yours for the last...

25 gloriously happy years.

So it's the same ring.

Technically, yes.

Yes.

It is the same ring. But in actuality,
it's your ring.

I see.

All my love.

All these years, I thought those words
were meant for me.

And now I find out they were meant for
somebody else.

Well, they were, but not now.

Oh, come on.

Carl, this ring used to make me feel so
special.

But now that I know it was never
intended for me, I can't

keep it. Harriet,

I got wine.

Hey, sweetheart.

Oh.

You know Mom had a fight?

How'd you know?

Well, the only time you're honest when
Mom's mad at you.

Well, she's not mad at me. It's worse.

She's disappointed in me.

Ouch. D -word.

Laura, let me bounce something off of
you.

Let's say your boyfriend gives you a
nice piece of jewelry.

And it happens to be a guy that you
really love.

Well, of course I love him. He gave me
jewelry.

Yeah, but years later, years and years
and years and years later, you find out

that he, well, intended it for another
girl.

How would you feel?

Daddy, what secondhand jewelry did you
give Mom?

Well, it might have been sort of kind of
like a engagement ring.

You're going to be ironing for a long
time.

Why are women so sentimental about these
things?

On behalf of all women everywhere,
excuse me.

Well, Laura, this ring to me is a
symbol. A symbol of my love

for your mother. And I felt nothing but
love when I presented it to her.

Then let me ask you a question. Sure.

Do you remember the day you bought that
ring?

You bet I do.

It was a rainy Saturday in May, 1972,
and I had just finished trimming my

All right.

And when you picked out that diamond,
did you have a picture in your mind the

smile it would bring?

Well, of course.

Now tell me, what face would that smile
attach to?

Oh, I'm going to be ironing for a long
time.

Steve, you look very handsome tonight.

Thank you, Laura.

I'm wearing my new Italian designer suit
from AMS.

AMS? Yeah.

That's my suit.

Boy, you look so beautiful.

Thank you, Steve.

If you tell me what you like, I'll order
it for you.

Why would I do that?

Because sometimes fancy cool guys order
for their women.

Well, not this woman.

No, something like, I want to save room
for dessert.

What's that going to be?

Your lips.

Excuse me, kind sir, but do you take
requests?

Certainly. Anything but rap.

This lovely lady and I met in
kindergarten.

Miss Ostendorff's class, September 3rd,
1981.

I've loved Laura Winslow ever since.

So if you don't mind, tonight I'd like
to sing her our song.

You know, if you had told me that a year
ago, I would have said you were nuts.

But now I see what you mean.

Steve has a way of getting under your
skin.

You know what's awful, Laura?

What?

He loves you the way I love him.

You see, that's the whole point, Monica.

You deserve somebody who's going to love
you the same way.

Selfish, cold -hearted, yuppie hag I
thought you were.

How sweet.

Here.

I want you to have this.

Why?

Well, it's a peace offering.

A way for you and I to bury the hatchet.

Mara, I cannot take your watch.

Really, I want you to have it, okay?

Well, all right.

I guess I'll let you two lovebirds alone
now.

Bye, Steven.

Goodbye, Myra.

Please don't ever forget me, okay?

Oh, no danger of that.

Was that frightening or what?

That's the love of her life.

I really feel bad for her.

I'm sorry.

I wanted this date to be so perfect.

But because of me, it ended up a
disaster.

Relax. It's still early.

I'm sure the rest of the date will be
just perfect.

Hi, sweetheart.

Harriet, can I have a moment of your
time, please?

What is it, Carl?

Would you please take a seat?

Sweetheart, you were right about the
ring.

It was incredibly inconsiderate of me
to...

Give you a ring that was originally
intended for another woman.

Thank you.

Harriet, you are the most important
woman in the world to me.

And you deserve a ring that's yours and
yours alone.

May I have your hand, please?

old one.

Read the inscription.

My true love, Harriet.

Thank you, God.

Harriet Winslow, I have loved you since

the very first moment I saw you.

Would you stay married to me?

Oh, yes, Carl.

Forever.

Laura Lee Winslow, arrested January
30th, 1998 for petty theft.

Subsequently released for lack of
evidence.

and then rearrested 90 minutes later for
assaulting this woman.

Myra Boutros Boutros Monkhouse, a .k .a.
Snuggle Buns, Cheese Knees, and Sugar

Lips.

A search of her home revealed illegal
surveillance equipment and led to

of stalking this man,

Stephen Q. Urkel, who did absolutely
nothing wrong.

but just wanted to have his picture
taken.