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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:10,800 --> 00:00:11,800 Steve. 2 00:00:12,220 --> 00:00:16,440 Do you have to do that? 3 00:00:17,260 --> 00:00:19,220 Yep. I'm getting for a new record. 4 00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:20,800 3 ,020. 5 00:00:21,180 --> 00:00:23,520 3 ,030. Oh, wait. No, no, no, no, no. 6 00:00:26,480 --> 00:00:28,180 Now, no more paddle ball. 7 00:00:31,220 --> 00:00:32,220 Huh. 8 00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:33,840 No more paddle ball. 9 00:00:35,260 --> 00:00:36,760 Thank you, because I have to study. 10 00:01:07,310 --> 00:01:08,690 I'm trying to study. 11 00:01:09,170 --> 00:01:11,410 Now get out of here before I bust you upside your head. 12 00:01:12,250 --> 00:01:13,250 Well, sure. 13 00:01:13,310 --> 00:01:14,710 As long as you ask so nicely. 14 00:01:19,530 --> 00:01:22,450 You know, I was going to tell you something really neat, too, but not 15 00:02:29,610 --> 00:02:30,710 My, you're getting stronger. 16 00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:34,850 Evidently not strong enough. 17 00:02:36,070 --> 00:02:39,150 Look, Myrtle, just because you're Steve's cousin does not mean that you 18 00:02:39,150 --> 00:02:40,270 over here without calling. 19 00:02:41,350 --> 00:02:45,670 Edward, I have come all the way from the great state of Mississippi to 20 00:02:45,670 --> 00:02:50,730 personally invite you to the event of the year, the Biloxi debutante ball. 21 00:02:52,490 --> 00:02:54,430 Gee, I'm so sorry I can't go. 22 00:02:54,910 --> 00:02:56,090 But you don't know when it is. 23 00:02:56,310 --> 00:02:57,310 Doesn't matter. 24 00:03:03,530 --> 00:03:05,350 My introduction to Biloxi Society. 25 00:03:08,870 --> 00:03:09,870 Biloxi Society? 26 00:03:10,670 --> 00:03:13,270 What do they do, put your picture on the side of a bus? 27 00:03:16,730 --> 00:03:18,150 Just all you want. 28 00:03:18,810 --> 00:03:22,610 But if I don't show up with a good -looking man, that Sarah Sue Pettyjohn 29 00:03:22,610 --> 00:03:24,350 make me the laughingstock of Biloxi. 30 00:03:24,870 --> 00:03:27,310 Well, hasn't your shoe size already done that? 31 00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:34,420 That Sarah Sue is a snooty... little trollop who's always been jealous of my 32 00:03:34,420 --> 00:03:35,420 beauty. 33 00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:41,540 Now, I will fly you in, buy you a tux, and give you a lot of spending money. 34 00:03:41,860 --> 00:03:42,860 Nope. 35 00:03:43,420 --> 00:03:47,140 If you say yes, maybe I'll say Ferrari. 36 00:03:49,240 --> 00:03:53,140 You can say legit Ferrari like here. Ain't no way I'm taking you anywhere. 37 00:04:03,159 --> 00:04:05,620 He doesn't thank you culturally enough for money. 38 00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:08,480 Say what? 39 00:04:09,380 --> 00:04:10,380 Yes. 40 00:04:10,720 --> 00:04:15,820 Big Daddy's trying to pair me up with some spinely, smooth -talking pretty 41 00:04:16,420 --> 00:04:18,760 But I like my man's rough and bumpy. 42 00:04:33,610 --> 00:04:34,610 Hey, Max. 43 00:04:34,650 --> 00:04:37,290 Oh, hi, Max. Well, you're all gussied up. 44 00:04:37,550 --> 00:04:38,990 What are you more off to tonight? 45 00:04:39,290 --> 00:04:43,050 The sizzle club. Word is Tony Braxton's in town and might drop by tonight. 46 00:04:46,850 --> 00:04:47,850 Hey, girl. 47 00:04:48,010 --> 00:04:49,010 Whoa, mama! 48 00:04:50,530 --> 00:04:51,570 Ring -a -ling -a -ding -dong. 49 00:04:52,510 --> 00:04:54,270 Girl, you are looking hot. 50 00:04:54,630 --> 00:04:56,970 Hot? Why, she could break up Siegfried and Roy. 51 00:04:59,990 --> 00:05:01,350 That dress is kicking. 52 00:05:01,770 --> 00:05:02,970 That dress is history. 53 00:05:03,840 --> 00:05:08,040 What? Laura, sweetheart, I can't allow you to go out in public dressed like 54 00:05:08,040 --> 00:05:11,320 that. Do you really think that's fair? Laura, if you want to go to the fizzle 55 00:05:11,320 --> 00:05:14,800 club, you're going to have to go upstairs and change right now. 56 00:05:17,720 --> 00:05:18,720 All right. 57 00:05:24,320 --> 00:05:25,259 Oh, yeah. 58 00:05:25,260 --> 00:05:27,280 Much better. Dee, shut him up. 59 00:05:30,760 --> 00:05:32,020 Is this better, Daddy? 60 00:05:33,680 --> 00:05:35,120 Yes, sweetheart, you look beautiful. 61 00:05:37,760 --> 00:05:40,580 Yeah, I'll be a big hit if it's nun night at the sizzle club. 62 00:05:42,640 --> 00:05:43,640 That's cute. 63 00:05:43,820 --> 00:05:45,020 Well, have fun. 64 00:05:45,900 --> 00:05:47,140 Yeah, gobs of fun. 65 00:05:51,500 --> 00:05:54,000 Well, look at it this way, Laura. 66 00:05:54,540 --> 00:05:56,500 At least know the girl will be wearing that dress. 67 00:05:57,700 --> 00:05:59,340 Yeah, I won't either. 68 00:06:03,560 --> 00:06:04,660 I thought you gave in too easy. 69 00:06:15,660 --> 00:06:19,140 Check you tomorrow, man. Be cool, man. All right. Peace. 70 00:06:19,420 --> 00:06:21,400 Peace. Peace. Peace. Peace. Peace. 71 00:06:22,680 --> 00:06:23,680 Peace. 72 00:06:31,800 --> 00:06:32,800 Peace. 73 00:06:33,210 --> 00:06:36,770 to ask you one more time to escort me to the Biloxi debutante ball. 74 00:06:37,030 --> 00:06:40,570 Now, this is your last chance, for I absolutely refuse the bag. 75 00:06:41,670 --> 00:06:42,670 No. 76 00:06:43,230 --> 00:06:50,190 Oh, please. I have to go with that pretty boy Big Daddy picked out for me. 77 00:07:17,680 --> 00:07:19,260 Oh, my God, what is that? 78 00:07:28,620 --> 00:07:30,540 How's she doing? 79 00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:32,840 She's still unconscious. 80 00:07:33,520 --> 00:07:39,420 Oh, I'm really sorry. I tried to stop the car, but... No, man, it wasn't your 81 00:07:39,420 --> 00:07:40,420 fault. Really. 82 00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:41,600 Thanks. 83 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:44,740 Oh, my God! 84 00:07:45,500 --> 00:07:47,040 Look what I did to her face! 85 00:07:51,380 --> 00:07:53,360 Oh, no, no, no, no, no. 86 00:07:53,880 --> 00:07:55,760 No, it was already like that. 87 00:07:59,260 --> 00:08:02,800 If I can do anything, please give me a call. 88 00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:04,080 Yeah, thank you. 89 00:08:08,480 --> 00:08:10,260 Hello. I'm Dr. Rubin. 90 00:08:10,760 --> 00:08:11,760 Eddie Winslow. 91 00:08:13,600 --> 00:08:16,420 Listen, Doc, is she going to be all right? 92 00:08:17,300 --> 00:08:21,460 Well, next 24 hours are going to be very critical for your girlfriend. Oh, hold 93 00:08:21,460 --> 00:08:22,460 up now. 94 00:08:24,400 --> 00:08:25,540 She ain't my girlfriend. 95 00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:27,480 Well, 96 00:08:27,480 --> 00:08:34,460 I'm going to 97 00:08:34,460 --> 00:08:36,200 send a plastic surgeon up to look at her face. 98 00:08:40,159 --> 00:08:41,940 Well, she didn't get hit in the face. 99 00:08:42,640 --> 00:08:43,640 I know. 100 00:08:45,870 --> 00:08:46,870 I'm very concerned, Eddie. 101 00:08:47,110 --> 00:08:51,330 If Myrtle doesn't regain consciousness soon, there's a strong possibility that 102 00:08:51,330 --> 00:08:52,810 she never will. 103 00:08:59,410 --> 00:09:02,350 This is terrible. 104 00:09:03,250 --> 00:09:06,550 Myrtle, this is all my fault. 105 00:09:08,210 --> 00:09:10,750 Lord, this girl risked her life to save mine. 106 00:09:11,390 --> 00:09:13,310 And all I've done is treat her badly. 107 00:09:14,380 --> 00:09:15,700 Please let her wake up. 108 00:09:16,280 --> 00:09:21,980 If you do, I promise I'll never say mean things to her again or try to push her 109 00:09:21,980 --> 00:09:22,980 out of my life. 110 00:09:23,660 --> 00:09:27,960 I'll even... I'll even... I'll even escort her to the debutante ball. 111 00:09:29,320 --> 00:09:30,760 Hallelujah, I'm healed! 112 00:09:53,710 --> 00:09:58,530 is taking you to the windy city oh good we're taking our cameras to chicago's 113 00:09:58,530 --> 00:10:03,510 hottest nightclub the sizzle club where we caught up with the hot tony braxton 114 00:10:03,510 --> 00:10:10,450 oh no this is a 115 00:10:10,450 --> 00:10:15,650 rerun no no no no it isn't you and max just went to see tony braxton last night 116 00:10:15,650 --> 00:10:20,150 yes the sizzle club's definitely the hot spot in chicago 117 00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:38,040 You on TV. 118 00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,120 No, it's not. 119 00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:46,940 You know how they say that everybody has a person that looks just like them? 120 00:10:48,140 --> 00:10:49,140 That's my double. 121 00:10:52,220 --> 00:10:56,480 Then your double is wearing that tiger print dress that I told you not to wear. 122 00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:02,520 It's me. 123 00:11:04,160 --> 00:11:06,240 I changed records after I left the house. 124 00:11:15,740 --> 00:11:17,480 I just cannot believe that you did that. 125 00:11:23,500 --> 00:11:24,500 You're not going to yell at me? 126 00:11:25,640 --> 00:11:26,860 No, Laura, I'm not going to yell at you. 127 00:11:28,560 --> 00:11:31,100 I'm too disappointed to yell at you. 128 00:11:47,210 --> 00:11:49,270 Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. 129 00:11:49,470 --> 00:11:52,490 and Mrs. Charles T. Wentworth of Wentworth Stables. 130 00:12:18,280 --> 00:12:21,560 That's so magical. How can I ever thank you for escorting me? 131 00:12:22,680 --> 00:12:23,680 Don't mention it. 132 00:12:24,380 --> 00:12:26,260 I mean, don't mention it to anyone. 133 00:12:28,540 --> 00:12:32,980 Ladies and gentlemen, Big Daddy Urkel of Urkel Peanuts. 134 00:12:38,980 --> 00:12:40,060 That's a Mr. 135 00:12:40,840 --> 00:12:42,420 Big Daddy to you, sonny boy. 136 00:12:43,780 --> 00:12:44,780 Edward. 137 00:12:45,450 --> 00:12:48,570 Can you just stand there with that music surging through your bones? 138 00:12:49,630 --> 00:12:50,529 Hey, look. 139 00:12:50,530 --> 00:12:51,530 There's Big Daddy. 140 00:12:52,530 --> 00:12:53,990 Myrtle, my child. 141 00:12:54,570 --> 00:12:56,250 Don't you Myrtle, my child, me. 142 00:12:56,610 --> 00:12:59,930 I know what you're thinking, and I will have nothing to do with that Marshall 143 00:12:59,930 --> 00:13:00,930 character. 144 00:13:01,350 --> 00:13:03,330 You know I love Eddie Winslow. 145 00:13:04,970 --> 00:13:07,790 I think I'm going to have to have a little talk with him. 146 00:13:08,910 --> 00:13:11,890 Now, baby girl, why don't you go and fix your face? 147 00:13:12,810 --> 00:13:15,050 Why does everybody keep telling me to do this? 148 00:13:19,410 --> 00:13:20,510 Excuse me, Edward. 149 00:13:21,170 --> 00:13:22,170 Take your time. 150 00:13:27,270 --> 00:13:33,710 Son, I'm gonna give you $10 ,000 right now to get your 151 00:13:33,710 --> 00:13:35,330 yankhead butt up on a plane. 152 00:13:35,650 --> 00:13:38,030 Ooh, sir, I really wish I could. 153 00:13:38,750 --> 00:13:42,930 But, uh, you see, I made a promise to God that I would escort Myrtle to this 154 00:13:42,930 --> 00:13:43,930 ball tonight. 155 00:13:44,060 --> 00:13:46,880 We just gonna have to see about that, won't we? 156 00:13:48,700 --> 00:13:50,120 Step out my way, boy. 157 00:13:54,640 --> 00:14:01,000 There goes that uppity Sarah Sue. 158 00:14:01,500 --> 00:14:03,140 We hate each other's guts. 159 00:14:18,920 --> 00:14:20,520 I was hit by a sport utility vehicle. 160 00:14:20,760 --> 00:14:21,760 What's your excuse? 161 00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:25,860 You have absolutely no breeding whatsoever. 162 00:14:26,900 --> 00:14:30,740 You see, that's the difference between old money and new money. 163 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:32,120 Oh, how true, how true. 164 00:14:32,420 --> 00:14:34,040 Old money has more wrinkles. 165 00:14:49,230 --> 00:14:50,230 No, no thanks. 166 00:14:50,970 --> 00:14:51,970 But it's double fun. 167 00:14:54,110 --> 00:14:55,110 Laura, I'm not hungry. 168 00:14:59,210 --> 00:15:00,430 Dad, can I talk to you about something? 169 00:15:00,750 --> 00:15:02,270 Mm -hmm. Sure. Have a seat. 170 00:15:07,330 --> 00:15:12,570 Look, I can take it when you're angry with me, or when you're grouchy with me, 171 00:15:12,590 --> 00:15:16,130 or even when you yell at me, but I just cannot take it when you're disappointed 172 00:15:16,130 --> 00:15:17,130 in me. 173 00:15:17,430 --> 00:15:20,900 Daddy? I'm sorry I wore that dress to the Sizzle Club. 174 00:15:21,660 --> 00:15:25,120 But I'm 20 and I feel like I should be able to wear any dress I want to. 175 00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:28,560 But sweetheart, you intentionally lied to me. 176 00:15:29,060 --> 00:15:30,640 And then you went behind my back. 177 00:15:31,100 --> 00:15:32,620 But I really wanted to wear that dress. 178 00:15:34,080 --> 00:15:35,480 You're a beautiful young lady. 179 00:15:36,660 --> 00:15:40,980 And if you wear that dress, you might not get the respect that you deserve. 180 00:15:44,380 --> 00:15:45,780 I never thought of it that way. 181 00:15:46,820 --> 00:15:48,120 Sweetheart, you're a young adult now. 182 00:15:49,800 --> 00:15:54,140 But if you want to be treated like a young adult, you're going to have to 183 00:15:54,140 --> 00:15:55,140 acting like one. 184 00:15:57,180 --> 00:15:59,300 You're actually beginning to think of me as an adult? 185 00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:02,000 I'm trying. 186 00:16:04,780 --> 00:16:07,440 But an adult would have stayed to talk out our problem. 187 00:16:08,340 --> 00:16:09,340 You're right. 188 00:16:10,080 --> 00:16:13,160 So you're saying if I wear something you don't approve of... 189 00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:16,580 We could talk about it, and you might be willing to bend a little? 190 00:16:18,160 --> 00:16:20,360 Yeah, I'll bend a little. 191 00:16:21,320 --> 00:16:22,700 But I'm not willing to break. 192 00:16:24,100 --> 00:16:25,100 Thanks, Ben. 193 00:16:25,560 --> 00:16:27,040 I'll do a little bending myself. 194 00:16:30,040 --> 00:16:31,040 Our next beloved guest... 195 00:16:43,500 --> 00:16:45,760 is Miss Sarah Sue Pettyjohn. 196 00:16:49,420 --> 00:16:51,360 Hello, gentle people. 197 00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:54,360 I'm just so tickled to be here. 198 00:16:55,760 --> 00:17:01,940 I am presently attending LSU, majoring in both pre -med and pre -law, and my 199 00:17:01,940 --> 00:17:05,680 goal is to be an extra on Baywatch. 200 00:17:51,820 --> 00:17:54,340 to be escorted by my Prince Charming. 201 00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:58,160 Edward Winslow is just gravy on my biscuits. 202 00:19:01,230 --> 00:19:02,910 I am somewhat incapacitated. 203 00:19:04,290 --> 00:19:07,630 And I may be a lot of things, but I certainly am not icky. 204 00:19:09,810 --> 00:19:11,530 Does anybody else here think I'm icky? 205 00:19:11,730 --> 00:19:12,730 Yes! 206 00:19:15,050 --> 00:19:16,110 Well, I can take a hint. 207 00:19:17,510 --> 00:19:21,990 Come on, baby girl. Myrtle, wait. 208 00:19:22,310 --> 00:19:23,310 Wait. 209 00:19:25,110 --> 00:19:26,130 Now, listen, everybody. 210 00:19:27,270 --> 00:19:29,650 Myrtle has waited her whole life for this evening. 211 00:19:30,250 --> 00:19:35,250 And nothing, nothing would stop her from being here. Not even getting hit by a 212 00:19:35,250 --> 00:19:36,550 car. An Explorer. 213 00:19:36,850 --> 00:19:37,850 A big sucker, too. 214 00:19:40,450 --> 00:19:43,890 Now, she pushed me out of the way of that car and saved my life. 215 00:19:44,430 --> 00:19:46,970 How many of you would have done the same for a friend, huh? 216 00:19:49,170 --> 00:19:53,550 It shows courage, class, and sacrifice. 217 00:19:55,010 --> 00:19:56,590 Myrtle deserves to be here. 218 00:19:57,260 --> 00:19:59,700 And there's absolutely no way that we're leaving. 219 00:20:00,060 --> 00:20:05,500 In fact, Miss Myrtle May Urkel, 220 00:20:05,580 --> 00:20:08,780 I can't believe I'm saying this. 221 00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:16,900 Would you honor me with a dance? 222 00:20:18,520 --> 00:20:19,720 Oh, take me, Edward. 223 00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:45,580 I got the peanut butter, but you ain't got no bread. 224 00:20:46,920 --> 00:20:51,560 I wish you hadn't told me that. I'm going to knock you upside your head. 225 00:20:51,820 --> 00:20:55,920 I got that feeling funky, getting down and spunky. 226 00:20:56,380 --> 00:21:02,000 Creamy, smooth and chunky peanut butter. One more time, boy. Come on. I got that 227 00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:05,340 feeling funky, getting down and spunky. 16238