All language subtitles for Family Matters s08e21 Flirting With Disaster
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1
00:00:00,930 --> 00:00:01,930
What's that?
2
00:00:02,910 --> 00:00:04,250
Tell your wife to stop worrying.
3
00:01:17,390 --> 00:01:20,670
to chew your ice like that. It's like
sitting next to a camel.
4
00:01:22,330 --> 00:01:24,750
I'm sorry,
5
00:01:27,550 --> 00:01:28,550
man.
6
00:01:29,170 --> 00:01:32,230
I'm still feeling down about Greta
breaking up with me.
7
00:01:32,930 --> 00:01:35,630
That's the third time this month. You
should be used to it by now.
8
00:01:36,630 --> 00:01:40,610
Hey, this time it wasn't my fault. She
should have never asked me if those
9
00:01:40,610 --> 00:01:41,610
made her look fat.
10
00:01:48,520 --> 00:01:49,458
Not for me.
11
00:01:49,460 --> 00:01:51,240
I don't think I'll ever get over Greta.
12
00:01:52,040 --> 00:01:53,600
I'm lost, I tell you.
13
00:01:57,400 --> 00:01:58,400
Ooh.
14
00:01:59,420 --> 00:02:00,640
Steve, did you see her?
15
00:02:00,940 --> 00:02:04,000
Oh, I saw her, I saw her, I saw her.
She's a looker, all right.
16
00:02:04,320 --> 00:02:06,940
Good. Hey, Eddie, did you just now get
over Greta?
17
00:02:07,260 --> 00:02:08,900
I think I'm on the road to recovery.
18
00:02:10,440 --> 00:02:13,200
Steve, she's the most beautiful girl
I've ever seen.
19
00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:16,260
Woman, not girl, Eddie. She's much older
than you.
20
00:02:16,600 --> 00:02:20,720
I happen to be very mature for my age.
Thank you. Oh, please.
21
00:02:21,140 --> 00:02:24,060
You still get up every Saturday morning
to watch the Bugs and Tweety Show.
22
00:02:25,340 --> 00:02:27,420
Why, please, please. That's a classic.
23
00:02:29,220 --> 00:02:30,320
You know what, guys?
24
00:02:31,360 --> 00:02:35,340
I think this calls for my love stare.
25
00:02:35,880 --> 00:02:36,880
Woo!
26
00:02:37,480 --> 00:02:39,040
Great finger touch.
27
00:02:39,700 --> 00:02:41,320
Not the love stare.
28
00:02:41,740 --> 00:02:42,740
That's right.
29
00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:44,180
What's the love stare?
30
00:02:45,580 --> 00:02:48,760
It'll look a pure bewitchlement and
seductionation.
31
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:52,780
He says it leaves women all Twitter
-painted.
32
00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:54,800
Does it work?
33
00:02:54,880 --> 00:02:55,880
Not usually.
34
00:02:57,400 --> 00:02:58,400
Check this out.
35
00:03:19,210 --> 00:03:20,210
I don't believe this.
36
00:03:20,330 --> 00:03:22,230
Hi, I'm Kimberly.
37
00:03:22,430 --> 00:03:24,730
Oh, nice to meet you. I'm Eddie Winslow.
38
00:03:25,150 --> 00:03:27,290
Well, Eddie Winslow, what can I do for
you?
39
00:03:27,490 --> 00:03:30,950
You know, that's funny. I was just about
to ask you the same thing.
40
00:03:31,590 --> 00:03:33,690
Hey, what's a person out there, Kimbo?
41
00:03:34,270 --> 00:03:37,750
Um, I'm a talent coordinator for Venture
Star Records, and we're having a talent
42
00:03:37,750 --> 00:03:38,990
contest here Saturday night.
43
00:03:39,630 --> 00:03:41,650
Whoa, $1 ,000 prize?
44
00:03:42,130 --> 00:03:44,150
Yeah, you ought to come by and cheer the
contestants on.
45
00:03:44,370 --> 00:03:48,290
Hey, hey, hey, can I sign up? Hi, I'm
Mia Courtney.
46
00:03:48,810 --> 00:03:52,710
Right now, focus, too. Wait till you
hear when it's cabbage -picking time in
47
00:03:52,710 --> 00:03:53,710
Brimahawk.
48
00:03:54,210 --> 00:03:56,770
We're looking for something a little
more contemplative.
49
00:03:57,690 --> 00:04:01,790
Oh, well, then you won my butt out here.
50
00:04:02,090 --> 00:04:06,730
Why, he's got a silky, sexy, make -you
-wanna -cow -by -the -fire voice.
51
00:04:07,410 --> 00:04:08,410
Oh, does he?
52
00:04:08,450 --> 00:04:12,830
Oh, does he say it? Oh, just a little
bit.
53
00:04:13,800 --> 00:04:18,180
You know, some people say that I'm a
cross between Luther Vandross and Mr.
54
00:04:18,339 --> 00:04:19,480
Marvin Gaye.
55
00:04:20,920 --> 00:04:22,220
Not a lot of people.
56
00:04:25,240 --> 00:04:29,080
Well, I tell you what. Before you leave,
stop by and sign up. I'd love to hear
57
00:04:29,080 --> 00:04:32,200
you sing. Oh, and I'd love to watch you
listen to me sing.
58
00:04:33,460 --> 00:04:37,900
Say, uh, you know, if I win that
thousand dollars, I'm gonna use some of
59
00:04:37,900 --> 00:04:38,900
money to take you to dinner.
60
00:04:39,120 --> 00:04:40,500
In that case, I hope you win.
61
00:04:45,080 --> 00:04:46,080
Yo, yo.
62
00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:49,320
You know I'm the mayor, right? I'm the
mayor!
63
00:04:52,600 --> 00:04:57,060
Chaos and destruction, destruction and
chaos.
64
00:04:57,740 --> 00:04:58,960
That's all I ever see.
65
00:04:59,720 --> 00:05:02,820
Well, I guess they don't call out the
insurance guy when everything is okay,
66
00:05:03,040 --> 00:05:04,040
huh?
67
00:05:04,640 --> 00:05:05,640
Why would they?
68
00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:08,600
Did you get an estimate?
69
00:05:08,900 --> 00:05:10,500
Oh, yeah, I sure did. Right over here.
70
00:05:11,900 --> 00:05:13,280
Hey, it's only $2 ,000.
71
00:05:13,640 --> 00:05:14,960
That's a lot less than usual.
72
00:05:15,340 --> 00:05:19,640
Mr. Winslow, according to our files, you
have had a huge number of accidents in
73
00:05:19,640 --> 00:05:23,000
your home this year. Yeah, well, I...
Twelve times the national average.
74
00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:24,240
Yeah.
75
00:05:24,380 --> 00:05:26,340
How do you account for all these
disasters?
76
00:05:26,640 --> 00:05:33,060
I'm sorry, I didn't know we had
visitors. How are you doing? Yes, well,
77
00:06:11,600 --> 00:06:16,020
That young man is a twinago in saddle
shoes. Yeah, I know.
78
00:06:16,880 --> 00:06:17,880
Hold it!
79
00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:21,960
Are you responsible for this mess?
80
00:06:26,660 --> 00:06:27,960
Oh, yeah.
81
00:06:29,720 --> 00:06:34,200
If it's broke, and in this house, it's
me.
82
00:06:35,060 --> 00:06:39,360
Mr. Winslow, this young man is such a
high -risk factor in your household.
83
00:06:39,740 --> 00:06:41,080
We're going to have to charge you higher
rates.
84
00:06:41,340 --> 00:06:42,340
Oh.
85
00:06:43,000 --> 00:06:44,020
How much?
86
00:06:44,460 --> 00:06:47,600
The same rate we charge people who live
next door to dynamite factories.
87
00:06:48,320 --> 00:06:49,380
$10 ,000.
88
00:06:49,780 --> 00:06:50,780
What?
89
00:06:51,440 --> 00:06:53,740
Mr. Tobin, I can't afford that.
90
00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:55,760
Well, we can't afford you.
91
00:06:56,140 --> 00:06:58,840
And frankly, neither of us can afford...
92
00:07:09,930 --> 00:07:11,270
I can't do that, Steve.
93
00:07:11,910 --> 00:07:14,950
There's a poster of you in every
insurance company in the country.
94
00:07:15,950 --> 00:07:18,330
His was the only one that didn't know
who you are.
95
00:07:19,130 --> 00:07:21,270
Your new premium will be due in ten
days.
96
00:07:23,410 --> 00:07:24,410
Here's our new calendar.
97
00:07:31,250 --> 00:07:35,450
I don't know what to say, Steve.
98
00:07:37,490 --> 00:07:38,490
Say goodbye.
99
00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:40,960
I'm gonna have to move out.
100
00:08:12,140 --> 00:08:14,260
pretty good. They might give Eddie a run
for his money.
101
00:08:14,600 --> 00:08:15,660
Beat my Eddie?
102
00:08:15,980 --> 00:08:17,320
I don't think so.
103
00:08:17,760 --> 00:08:20,740
Compared to Eddie, they sound like cats
on a trash can.
104
00:08:22,780 --> 00:08:25,640
Just remember, it's the audience
applause that determines the winner.
105
00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:29,000
Sure, listen. If it'll help him win the
money that he won't have to borrow from
106
00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:32,520
me, I will clap my hands and bang my
head on the table.
107
00:08:34,600 --> 00:08:36,320
All right, Cafe Java.
108
00:08:36,740 --> 00:08:40,720
Put your hands together for our last act
of the evening, Mr. Eddie Winslow.
109
00:09:08,080 --> 00:09:09,380
Listen to me.
110
00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:13,360
I've been trying for quite some time
111
00:09:13,360 --> 00:09:19,260
to hold back my feelings.
112
00:09:20,800 --> 00:09:24,960
Girl, they think you've got me
hypnotized.
113
00:09:27,280 --> 00:09:33,340
And that's for real. And now your body's
gone.
114
00:09:48,650 --> 00:09:49,950
What a terrific night.
115
00:09:50,290 --> 00:09:53,810
I mean, I won the contest, and you're
going to help me with my recording
116
00:09:54,230 --> 00:09:56,250
I mean, you're really terrific,
Kimberly.
117
00:09:56,770 --> 00:09:59,370
You do all this for me, and you hardly
even know me.
118
00:09:59,830 --> 00:10:02,890
Well, you know, Eddie, I'd like to work
on that, too.
119
00:10:17,770 --> 00:10:18,870
Mother? I mean, Harriet.
120
00:10:21,690 --> 00:10:24,290
Oh, Mom, this is Kimberly.
121
00:10:24,570 --> 00:10:25,950
She's the one that ran the contest.
122
00:10:26,550 --> 00:10:28,010
Kimberly, this is my mother, Harriet.
123
00:10:28,570 --> 00:10:29,570
Hello.
124
00:10:30,110 --> 00:10:31,110
Nice to meet you, Harriet.
125
00:10:33,070 --> 00:10:34,690
You have a really talented son.
126
00:10:34,950 --> 00:10:35,950
Thank you.
127
00:10:41,370 --> 00:10:42,490
I should be going.
128
00:10:43,050 --> 00:10:44,050
Yeah.
129
00:10:46,220 --> 00:10:47,520
You were really great tonight. Oh.
130
00:10:48,240 --> 00:10:49,300
Thanks, Kim.
131
00:10:49,660 --> 00:10:50,660
All right.
132
00:10:51,580 --> 00:10:52,680
I'll be in your car.
133
00:10:53,060 --> 00:10:54,060
All right.
134
00:10:59,440 --> 00:11:00,460
Isn't she great, Mom?
135
00:11:01,240 --> 00:11:02,240
Uh -huh.
136
00:11:03,600 --> 00:11:05,880
I'd say about ten years greater than
you.
137
00:11:08,780 --> 00:11:11,940
Mom, she's only nine years older than
me.
138
00:11:12,500 --> 00:11:13,500
Older than nine, huh?
139
00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:16,520
Don't you still think that's a big age
difference?
140
00:11:17,080 --> 00:11:19,040
Well, maybe in dog years.
141
00:11:21,300 --> 00:11:22,300
Listen, Eddie.
142
00:11:22,340 --> 00:11:26,540
You know, if you were 70 and she was 79,
I really wouldn't be worried about
143
00:11:26,540 --> 00:11:28,980
this. Mainly because I'd be dead.
144
00:11:31,300 --> 00:11:35,740
But when a young man is 20 and a lady's
29, that's a big difference.
145
00:11:36,220 --> 00:11:40,820
Mom, it depends on the people. I mean,
we just spent three hours together, and
146
00:11:40,820 --> 00:11:41,820
we're really in sync.
147
00:11:43,240 --> 00:11:44,320
I like her a lot.
148
00:11:44,760 --> 00:11:46,020
I know you do, honey.
149
00:11:46,660 --> 00:11:48,720
And I don't doubt that your feelings are
genuine.
150
00:11:50,060 --> 00:11:51,340
But I'm worried about hers.
151
00:11:52,740 --> 00:11:53,740
Well, what about them?
152
00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:58,420
Eddie, a lot of women like to go out
with younger guys.
153
00:11:58,680 --> 00:12:00,120
They like to have a good time.
154
00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:03,360
But then the guy usually winds up
getting hurt.
155
00:12:04,180 --> 00:12:06,820
Well, so far, she's gotten me into a
contest.
156
00:12:07,120 --> 00:12:10,840
I've won $1 ,000, and she's working on
getting me a recording contract.
157
00:12:11,220 --> 00:12:13,450
And if that's hurting me, Bring it on.
158
00:12:16,270 --> 00:12:20,710
Honey, all I'm asking is that you just
keep your eyes open.
159
00:12:21,090 --> 00:12:25,990
Well, Mom, all I'm asking is that you
start thinking of me as a man and not as
160
00:12:25,990 --> 00:12:26,889
your little boy.
161
00:12:26,890 --> 00:12:30,650
Eddie, all I'm saying is... All you're
saying is that you want to run my life
162
00:12:30,650 --> 00:12:32,930
and tell me who I can and can't go out
with.
163
00:12:35,650 --> 00:12:39,450
I just wish you'd just stop treating me
like a baby, Mom.
164
00:12:59,340 --> 00:13:00,420
What are you doing here?
165
00:13:01,440 --> 00:13:02,440
What?
166
00:13:04,160 --> 00:13:10,320
I need to talk to you about Carl
Winslow, policy number 659 -1173
167
00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:13,780
-000Z. I'm a very busy man, Mr. Urkel.
168
00:13:14,580 --> 00:13:17,820
Listen, Vernon, you can't charge Carl
$10 ,000.
169
00:13:18,240 --> 00:13:19,280
He'll break it.
170
00:13:19,720 --> 00:13:20,720
That's not my problem.
171
00:13:21,080 --> 00:13:23,960
My job is to sell insurance, not help
people.
172
00:13:25,340 --> 00:13:27,440
Besides, he keeps us all ready if you
move out.
173
00:13:31,370 --> 00:13:36,730
Destitute! Ripped from the womb of the
family I've come to know and love as my
174
00:13:36,730 --> 00:13:37,730
very own!
175
00:13:41,670 --> 00:13:43,210
This is what you've done!
176
00:13:43,470 --> 00:13:46,390
I can't no longer take that home and fix
it!
177
00:15:46,220 --> 00:15:47,199
you come here?
178
00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:50,140
To convince this man that I am not a
hazard.
179
00:15:50,900 --> 00:15:52,640
Well, looks like you're doing a good
job.
180
00:15:54,280 --> 00:15:58,960
Well, don't worry about it, Steve,
because I found you a place to live.
181
00:15:59,900 --> 00:16:00,900
You did?
182
00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:01,919
Mm -hmm.
183
00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:04,520
A nice little apartment on Argyle
Street.
184
00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:07,200
Argyle? Did you say Argyle?
185
00:16:07,440 --> 00:16:08,680
I live on Argyle.
186
00:16:09,280 --> 00:16:10,280
Really?
187
00:16:11,740 --> 00:16:13,180
4259 North or South?
188
00:16:21,229 --> 00:16:22,710
Well, what do you know, Steve?
189
00:16:23,270 --> 00:16:25,310
You're gonna be living next door to Mr.
190
00:16:25,730 --> 00:16:26,730
Talbert!
191
00:16:28,090 --> 00:16:29,590
We're gonna be neighbors!
192
00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:34,570
Bugs! Maybe you'll let me store some of
my radioactive materials in your
193
00:16:34,570 --> 00:16:35,570
freezer.
194
00:16:35,990 --> 00:16:37,030
Well, come on, Steve.
195
00:16:37,570 --> 00:16:39,030
You got a lot of packing to do.
196
00:16:39,310 --> 00:16:40,610
Oh, yeah. Oh, boy.
197
00:16:40,950 --> 00:16:41,950
Wait!
198
00:16:42,330 --> 00:16:43,330
Yes?
199
00:16:45,430 --> 00:16:46,850
I won't change your rent.
200
00:16:50,120 --> 00:16:51,260
Not just sell insurance.
201
00:16:52,420 --> 00:16:53,760
I'll give the kid another chance.
202
00:16:53,980 --> 00:16:54,980
Really?
203
00:16:55,220 --> 00:16:59,420
Provided that you keep him away from my
neighborhood. Oh, oh, oh, miles away.
204
00:16:59,760 --> 00:17:01,580
Miles away. Right, Steve?
205
00:17:02,500 --> 00:17:07,400
Positively. Won't go anywhere near him.
You'll never lay eyes on me again.
206
00:17:07,900 --> 00:17:08,900
Thank you.
207
00:17:12,140 --> 00:17:13,880
Great plan, big guy.
208
00:17:14,180 --> 00:17:15,339
Worked like a charm.
209
00:17:35,530 --> 00:17:36,650
I got your message. What's up?
210
00:17:37,330 --> 00:17:41,750
Um, well, well, I just wanted to talk.
211
00:17:42,250 --> 00:17:43,910
Talk now, cuddle later?
212
00:17:44,870 --> 00:17:47,130
No, just talk.
213
00:17:48,010 --> 00:17:49,190
You sound serious.
214
00:17:50,090 --> 00:17:54,930
Well, Kimberly, I got to talking to
somebody about us the other day, and,
215
00:17:55,010 --> 00:17:56,010
it started me thinking.
216
00:17:56,290 --> 00:17:57,289
What about?
217
00:17:57,290 --> 00:18:01,230
Well, you know, we've been seeing a
whole lot of each other these past few
218
00:18:01,230 --> 00:18:04,740
and... Well, I just want to make sure
that we're on the same page in this
219
00:18:04,740 --> 00:18:05,740
relationship.
220
00:18:06,340 --> 00:18:09,400
Well, you know, if you lose your place,
I have a bookmark for you.
221
00:18:11,260 --> 00:18:12,260
Well,
222
00:18:13,440 --> 00:18:14,740
no, I'm serious.
223
00:18:16,180 --> 00:18:20,620
I think you're really special, and I
can't stop thinking about you.
224
00:18:21,500 --> 00:18:22,500
Whoa.
225
00:18:22,980 --> 00:18:25,600
I like you too, Eddie, but let's not go
crazy.
226
00:18:26,740 --> 00:18:27,740
Well, why not?
227
00:18:28,480 --> 00:18:30,240
Eddie, my life's complicated.
228
00:18:30,460 --> 00:18:32,020
I... Travel a lot?
229
00:18:32,500 --> 00:18:33,960
I see other people.
230
00:18:38,440 --> 00:18:39,440
You do?
231
00:18:40,880 --> 00:18:45,260
Eddie, we're having a lot of fun, but a
good time is really all I'm about.
232
00:18:46,080 --> 00:18:49,040
Well, yeah, but I thought that we were
more than that.
233
00:18:51,100 --> 00:18:54,960
I didn't mean to lead you on, but let's
face it, Eddie, you're only 20.
234
00:18:56,420 --> 00:18:57,700
Whoa, what?
235
00:18:57,940 --> 00:18:58,940
What?
236
00:18:59,040 --> 00:19:00,300
So you're saying what?
237
00:19:00,780 --> 00:19:03,560
You can't take me serious because I'm
younger than you?
238
00:19:06,740 --> 00:19:08,860
Well, yeah.
239
00:19:10,860 --> 00:19:12,420
Well, what about who I am?
240
00:19:13,200 --> 00:19:17,360
I care about you for who you are. I
mean, your age doesn't mean snap to me.
241
00:19:17,620 --> 00:19:21,780
Hey, lighten up. I mean, can't we just
hang out? Uh -uh. No.
242
00:19:22,840 --> 00:19:27,040
Look, I care about you. And I want a
meaningful relationship.
243
00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:29,480
That's what I'm about.
244
00:19:57,980 --> 00:19:58,980
Will it be?
245
00:19:59,660 --> 00:20:00,660
Give me a latte.
246
00:20:02,400 --> 00:20:04,560
And make it a double.
17362
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