Original subtitles

Well, that's it. We're done.

Thanks for all your help, Stephon. Oh, wait, wait.

Where's my reward?

Coming right up.

How about a game of hearts?

Why bother?

You've already won mine.

Curtis. Baby, you look prettier every day.

Um, Curtis, I thought I told you we couldn't see each other anymore.

You can't blame a guy for trying.

No, but I can.

I guess I should have called first.

I guess you should have.

I just came by to pick up my sweater.

Sweater?

Oh, uh -huh. Well, you know, it's upstairs.

I'm gonna go get it.

So, Laura has your sweater.

That's right.

See, Laura and Eddie were standing in line at the movie theater, and I

to walk by.

Oh, and Laura said she was cold? She didn't have to. I could tell.

It's a connection we have.

I see you like to play games.

Bring it on.

Man, you can't do that.

Why

are

we putting marshmallows between our toes?

Because Steve used all the cotton balls for his latest invention.

What is it?

Q -tips for elephants.

But who?

Don't ask.

Hey, Stefan and I are going to the scissor club tonight. You want to come?

meet a cute guy.

I don't think so.

You still miss Waldo, don't you?

He was my Wally Pop for four years.

Look, I still have the dear Max letter he sent me from New York.

Look how he addressed it.

To Maxine in Chicago.

The one in the brown building.

Next door to the Kinkos.

Across the street from the subway.

The train, not the sandwich.

Oh, God, that gets me.

You need to get out more.

I don't think I'm ready. I mean, if a guy hit on me, I wouldn't even know what

to say.

You wouldn't have to say a thing. The guy's going to do all the talking.

I don't know.

Look at yourself.

Girl, you got it going on.

You really think so?

With your braids, that face, and your figure, you can have any man you want.

That's right.

The next time Waldo writes me, he'll have to address it to the Maxine in a

house on the hill with a handsome husband, two kids, and a Corvette in the

driveway.

Go, girl. Okay.

guys doing up?

It is almost midnight.

Oh, we're watching Jurassic Convent.

In 3D.

Is that dinosaur eating a nun?

Well, she shouldn't have slapped him with a ruler.

Come on, guys. Time to hit the sack. Come on.

Don't argue.

Go up, brush your teeth, hop into bed, and I'll be up there in a few minutes to

tuck you in.

You're welcome, sugar. Now, plant a nice juicy one right there.

Love you.

You know, Mom, I

really appreciate you babysitting the boys, but I don't think you should let

them twist you around their little finger.

What are you talking about? We're just having fun.

Well, Mom, you let them stay up way past the bedtime.

You let them watch scary movies, and apparently you let them eat their entire

weight in junk food.

Carl, they had a good solid dinner.

Like what, Ma?

Well, we made peanut butter sandwiches and dipped them in melted Snickers.

Mmm, that sounds tasty.

Work with me, Harriet.

Mother, you are way too permissive.

Now... You let the boys get away with things that Harry and I would never

Now, look, Buster, when I babysit, I'm in charge, and I do things my way.

Capiche?

Mother, if you cannot respect my wishes, I'm simply not going to allow you to

babysit anymore.

Not allow me? Now, you listen up, Carl.

Those kids are my grandbabies, and I'm going to spend time with them, and when

do, we're going to have fun.

Now, if you have a problem with that, we're gonna throw down right now.

these pies over to the college bake sale by 7.

Yeah. Can I eat one more?

Steve, you already eaten six whole pies.

I know, but I'm hungry again now that I've thrown up.

Just decorate the pies.

Hi,

Steve. Laura, the most amazing thing happened to me today at the mall. What?

Okay, I walked into Music World to scope out the gangster rap golden oldies.

I grabbed a CD, and out of nowhere, this gorgeous guy comes up behind me and

grabs the same one.

When our hands touched, it was like... Oh, no, Sparks!

Oh, more than Sparks. We are talking 4th of July.

Just like you said, Laura. He talked and flirted with me, and somehow I just

knew what to say.

And did he buy a Cinnabon, too?

Because when a guy really likes you, he buys you a Cinnabon.

Yes, he bought me a Cinnabon.

Large or small?

He is taking me to the sizzle club.

Pinch him in the room.

Why did you do that, Laura?

Do what?

When she stole my man.

Your man.

You broke up with Curtis.

He's not your man anymore.

Now, he's my man.

Should I be getting some handy wipes?

Stay out of this.

I just got

the wax sucked out of my ears.

You know, Max, what is your problem?

You don't have anything better to do than to steal my...

is because you didn't want him anymore.

And now you don't want anybody else to have him either?

I think it's obvious that he's on the rebound.

And the only reason he's seeing you is to get closer to me. Oh, uh -uh.

He wasn't acting like he was on the rebound while he was kissing me.

face on the table.

99 Steve, here

comes the Sandman.

I miss you too, Carl. And the kids would like you to babysit again.

I would love to.

But there are going to have to be some ground rules that I am going to have to

insist upon.

Like what?

Well, absolutely no junk food.

I'll decide what's junk.

No staying up late. I'll decide what's late.

No scary movies.

I'll decide what's scary.

Mother, I just don't understand why you are fighting me on this issue.

Carl. I know you think I'm being irresponsible, but the truth is

kids is a special treat for them and for me.

Well, I know that, Mama.

Don't you remember when you were little how you loved staying with your

grandparents when your father and I went out?

Well, yeah, I remember.

Well, do you remember why?

Because they spoiled you rotten.

Oh, but now, see, there you go.

Didn't that bother you? No way.

Look how great you turned out.

You see, Carl, parents have to say no.

But grandparents get to say yes.

I love you, Mama.

I love you, too, darling. I don't know what I'm going to do with you, but I

you. Well, then, give me a big hug.

Baby, your beauty is blinding.

Thank you.

So, where to?

The sizzle club?

No way.

Curtis and that witch are gonna be there.

Ouch, ouch, ouch. Way nice.

Hey, Max. Hello, Stefan.

Hey, what's up?

I need to talk to Laura.

She's not here.

Laura, I have something to say to you, and I'm not leaving until you hear me

out.

Look, I'm warning you, Maxine, I still have a few Boston creams.

How long have we been best friends?

Since third grade.

That's right. Ever since we both came to school with our punky Brewster

lunchboxes.

And that's too long to let some dumb guy come between us.

Hey, yo, was that a shot?

Oh, yeah, but don't take it personal. They're just cranky.

You're cute, baby, but me and Laura, we go way back.

Hey, they do go way back.

No, Max, I'm the one who should be apologizing. I mean, I was paranoid and

jealous and selfish and greedy and feel free to stop me at any time.

Stop now.

Friends forever.

Hey,

you want to go to the sizzle club with us? We'd love to.

Well,

you mind if we tag along?

Yeah, but I can deal with it.

But first...

Another peanut butter and sticker sandwich?

Absolutely not.

Why not?

Carl, I'm your mother, not your grandmother.

Now sit and straight.