Original subtitles

Steve, I know I'm going to regret asking this, but what's this thing?

Wait. I have successfully developed a process that enables me to isolate and

duplicate complex molecules.

What?

I can clone stuff.

They have a miracle drug now called Ritalin.

You don't understand. If this baby works, now if people want two of

all they'll have to say is, I'll go eat.

Let me show you.

All right, Steve.

But fair warning.

If that thing explodes, breaks anything, or shoots a sticky substance all over

me, I'm going to be all over you.

Don't you worry, Sahib.

You and your environs are safe.

on with it.

I'll go get something else to clone.

Thank you.

Hey, Steve.

Hey, Steve.

What's wrong with him?

Never hit a pothole on a unicycle.

What's that awful smell?

Fish livers.

I mix them with seaweed and sardine juice, add a little yogurt, and bingo,

smoothie. I'm having a little problem with one of my inventions, and this gunk

really helps clear out the cobwebs.

That gunk could clear out a stadium.

I may be stupid, but I'm not stupid.

He's anchovy paste.

my bowling.

I'm not.

I'm wet.

I'm sticky.

And I smell like a...

You just took it.

Well, I didn't.

Yes, you did. A few seconds ago.

How?

What?

You look tired.

Overworked. Maybe you need to relax.

Paint some pictures of your feet.

Are you seeing what I'm seeing?

I'm seeing two Steves.

Oh, my God.

raises a few unusual questions.

Such as?

Well, you have a twin brother now.

Have you told your parents yet?

I holed up him late last night in Moscow.

They were so overwhelmed by the news, they immediately burst into tears.

Your parents are over in Russia, so I'm stuck with, I mean, blessed

with being your guardian.

And, well, that makes things a little bit more complicated now that there is

of you.

Complicated?

He means expensive.

Well, you are an extra mouth to feed, but I'm really not worried because we're

all going to be millionaires.

We are?

Mm -hmm. So let's say we hustle out to the garage and start cloning a bunch of

these.

You want to tell him?

Nah, you better tell him. Tell me what?

We destroyed the cloning machine.

You what?

And we decided it was ethically indefensible.

Ethically what?

Put your arms around my neck and hold.

And share.

There's enough pollen on this flower for two bumblebees.

Now, why don't you boys come over here and sit next to me?

Isn't this fun? We just made a mire.

what we've learned here.

Um, one plus one equals fun?

No, I think we've learned that Steve's experiments have gone too far.

He's created a monster.

Can't we just get rid of him?

Just gonna rub me out?

No. I mean, after all, you are a living, breathing, annoying thing.

I see a really, really good solution.

Listen, Steve.

I'm sorry.

Goodbye, Steve.

So long, Steve.

I'm glad I made you, Steve.

Me too, Steve.

I'm really going to miss you, Steve.

Could it be?

I believe you've grown even more beautiful.

Steve Urkel, the man who made me. We meet at last.

Wow, you really are cool.

Put her there, pal.

We'll work on that, buddy.

I'm back, my love.

Yeah, and it's time for good.

Baby, with you, it's all good.

Oh, my.

I'm really glad Laura's happy.

But I'm really going to miss my clone.