All language subtitles for Ellen s04e24 Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah

Congratulate me. You told your parents
you're gay.

No, but I asked them to meet me at Mr.
Foo's at 8 o 'clock, and by 8 .30, my

parents will know that I'm gay.

Ooh, what's happening at 8 .30?

Ellen, don't you think that it's maybe
too soon?

I mean, you know when you go shopping
for shoes, you go in the store, you try

them on, you kind of walk around in them
for a little while, make sure they

really fit.

Uh -huh. Well, I bought the shoes. They
fit fine. I've thrown out the box. I've

got it all planned out.

happens we walk in we sit down ashong
the flamboyant waiter that's been

on us for years will come over take our
drink orders my dad's gonna order a tea

towel and my mom's gonna order a white
wine spritzer and then i'm gonna look

right in the eye i'm gonna say mom dad
ashong's gay and then get the dialogue

going don't you think ashong should come
out to your parents in his own time

maybe you should just write them a
letter You know, like when you go

a catalog.

You know, you kind of flip through.

Well, when I come out to a department
store, I'll consult you on that.

I just think it's best to be direct.

Indeed. Not an hour ago, I had to tell
the Mueller family that their

had passed away.

I was compassionate, but I told them
straight out. And I think they

my directness.

Mueller?

I thought you said the name of the
patient you lost was Miller.

I'll be right back.

Joan Jett in the black card.

You know I'm...

to tell us. Come on, isn't it obvious?

You saw her last week. She was just
glowing.

She's finally met Mr. Right. Wow.

You think so?

Maybe she'll even bring him.

I hope his name is Greg.

Hey, John and Rach. Hi.

Hey.

Ah, Mr. Morgan.

Out for an evening with your two
daughters?

Oh, Stan.

I know it's coming every time, and it
still makes me laugh.

Wait, where's the Sean?

Out on vacation.

Vacation?

He's a waiter. He can't afford to go
far. Where'd he go?

But, you know, we'll just order. We'll
just order drinks. Dad's going to have

the Ting Tao, and my mom's going to have
the white wine sprinter. Honey, I'm

just going to have a glass of water.
Yeah, and I'll have the iced tea.

You know, honey, I'm getting my new
driver's license tomorrow, and I don't

my eyes to look puffy.

white wine spritzer someone should
drink.

Okay.

So, what's the big news?

Yeah, well, um, there's something to
tell you.

Hey, do you think those two people over
there are

gay?

You mean the man and the woman with the
child in the booster seat?

I didn't see the baby. Well, Um, what do
you think about gay people?

In the military?

Yeah, yeah, in the military. What
branch?

Doesn't matter, Army, Navy, Air Force.

No, no, no, honey, you have to be
specific. I mean, we're talking apples

oranges here.

You know, honey, if this dinner was to
talk about current events, I didn't get

chance to read the paper this morning.

No, I just want to know, I mean, what do
you think of gay people?

Well, I loved Dustin Hoffman and
Tootsie.

He just dressed like a woman to get
acting work.

Really? Yeah. God, where was I?

But I tell you, when he took that makeup
off, I really missed Dorothy.

Do you know who looks good in a dress?
Nathan Lane.

Gene Hackman.

Now, Ellen didn't get us here to talk
about men in drag, did you, dear?

but I do want to just find out what you
think about gay people. I mean, somebody

here has got to be gay.

For the sake of argument, let's just say
it's me.

Okay,

let's try something else.

Let's say a Sean is your child.

What do you think of that? Well, I
wouldn't have named him a Sean.

Yeah, but he's your child, so... Well,
no, he's 50 years old. I would have had

to have him when I was 10.

Right, but he's your child, and he's
gay. What would you think if your child

gay? Our child is not gay.

Yes, she is.

What?

I'm gay.

Oh, hi there.

There we go.

You ready to order? Oh, wow, you just
try and stop us. I think we're starters.

We will have... that jingdao and white
wine spritzer.

And we'll have the moshu pork and some
steamed vegetables and two orders of

potstickers. Oh, I love those
potstickers. Ellie, is that going to be

vegetable to you? That's fine. Yeah, and
rice.

Lots and lots of rice.

Ah, Mr. Morgan.

You love that rice?

Oh, my God.

Oh, you forgot the wonton soup tonight.
I did forget. Lois, Ellie.

Well, let's see. Where were we? I was
late.

Michonne's on vacation.

Tootsie.

Gene Hackman.

Oh, that's right. I'm gay.

I don't understand. Why are you saying
this?

Honey, this is nonsense.

I mean, you know, you just sold the
bookstore and you're moving into a new

and...

It's just a very stressful time for you.

No, it's not about stress.

Honey, you know, just because you
haven't found the right man doesn't mean

you're gay. I mean, you're just very
choosy and there's nothing wrong with

choosy.

I'm not attracted to any men. No, that's
too choosy.

Well, how long have you known?

I don't know. Well, you weren't gay
yesterday.

Actually, yes, I was.

Oh, my God. It's the separation.

It is. It's the separation, isn't it?
No, it was not the separation.

Then did I push you too hard to wear
dresses?

Yes.

Yes, but that's not why I'm gay.

Was I too macho? I mean, it's the damn
Coast Guard in me.

I don't understand. You've always liked
boys.

I still do like boys. I just don't like
them the way other women like them.

Well, honey, then if you still like men,
don't give up so easily.

I have talked to someone. Well, maybe
you should talk to somebody else.

Well, it's just, you know, it isn't what
we expected at dinner tonight.

I know it's not. I know.

But please understand that for the first
time, I am really, really happy.

Oh.

So now you're saying you had a lousy
childhood.

Your brother, Stevie, had exactly the
same childhood, and he turned out

perfectly normal.

I am normal, Dad.

I'm sorry, Ellie. I don't know what I'm
saying.

You know, you always wanted me to be
open and honest with you. Oh, no, honey,

that's what you wanted.

I'm happy keeping our feelings bottled
up.

Well, you know what? I couldn't keep
them bottled up anymore, you know?

And you're my parents, and I wanted to
tell you.

And I guess somehow I thought that maybe
you already knew. Already knew?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's right, Ellie.
Yeah, yeah, we have known all along. And

then we're just pretending here to feel
shocked and upset and disappointed.

Well, um, so do you, uh...

Do you have a special friend?

No, I'm not seeing anyone.

Well, what does that mean? I mean, can
you be gay by yourself?

Yes.

Okay.

Then I'm gay.

I'm sorry, Ellen. Does that shock you? I
thought you knew all along.

Don't worry, dear.

He's not really gay.

Boy,

I wonder how it went with Ellen telling
her parents last night.

Well, I'm sure it was a lot like when I
told my parents I wanted to become an

American citizen.

First they were hurt, but then when they
realized I was leaving the country,

they threw a big party.

Coming out to your parents is like a
life -changing experience.

It's probably the biggest thing that
ever happened. Excuse me. Hi. I'm sorry.

But ever since Ellen decided she was
gay, that is all we ever talk about. I

have things going on in my life, too. Of
course you do. Of course you do, honey.

We know that.

Go ahead. What's going on?

Really? Yeah. Okay.

Well, all right.

I was in this huge meeting yesterday,
and who walked in?

But William Hurt. And I'm sitting there,
and I'm in this fabulous suit. And he

turns right to me, and he says that he
wants to... Ellen!

Ellen! How'd it go last night? Yeah,
what happened? Well, my mom kept asking

what she did wrong, and my dad stormed
out before the food got there.

So what I'm hearing is there's leftover
Chinese food at home?

That was insensitive, wasn't it?

So anyway, William Hurt... Ellen,
you're...

are from a different era.

I mean, they expected you to be the prom
queen, marry your high school

sweetheart, and live happily ever after.

I mean, what were they thinking?

I mean, what... I'm gay.

I'm not hurting anybody.

If you don't count my parents.

They obviously don't want to deal with
this.

Too bad there's not some sort of 12
-step program for this sort of thing.

You know, the alcoholics and drug
addicts have it so sweet.

has a family support group.

this old A -track tape that you lent me.

I hope you still like Ann Murray.

Thank you.

I called you. Did you get the message?
You didn't call me back. Well, I've been

so busy down here with my trains, I
guess I just lost track of the time. Ah,

train track. That's funny. Track of
time.

Boy, that kills them at the hobby shop,
huh?

I thought maybe you may be, you know,
you...

When you left the restaurant the other
night, I thought maybe you were still

upset when I told you that. You already
told us, and now we all know, and

there's no reason to discuss it ever
again.

Can I have that cattle cart?

Thank you.

We don't have to discuss it. It's just
that, you know, that's sort of the point

why I told you. I mean, we're not going
to discuss it. I could have kept it to

myself. Well, fine. Why don't we just do
that?

I haven't been down here in a while.
This place has really expanded, huh?

What happened to the little corner
coffee shop?

Starbucks drove them out of business.

Who knew that Morganville would be a
cappuccino kind of town, huh?

Well, the frozen yogurt place really
took off. Yeah.

Well, tell me about it. I mean, Edna's a
hard worker.

What are you working on over there?

It's your new house.

And this is your family.

And I guess we don't need them anymore.

Dad, just because I'm gay doesn't mean
that I can't have a family.

I mean, I don't need him.

You know what?

We could put him with Edna over here.
She's been a widow.

Seven years now, she's ready to love
again, don't you think?

Dad, we have to talk about this. No, I
don't think we do. I think we've just

about covered everything.

Well, maybe you and me and Mom, maybe we
could go to a place, you know,

someplace that could help us, you know,
be more comfortable to talk about this

whole gay thing.

I don't want to talk about it.

You know what, Dad?

Real life is not Morganville.

You know, in real life, when a tree
falls down, you can't just glue it back.

And when your daughter tells you that
she's gay, you can't just put her on the

first train out of town. Because you
know why, Dad? The train doesn't go out

town. The train just goes around and
around in circles.

Ellie, I'm really trying here.

I don't know.

I mean...

I just don't feel comfortable. I don't
know any gay people.

Yes, you do.

You know me.

Hi. I'm here. Hey, Mom.

Hi.

Where's Dad? Parking the car?

No, he didn't want to come.

Well, to tell you the truth, I didn't
really want to come either.

Well, I'm glad you did.

You know, he's not ready yet. It's going
to take him a little time.

Is that one of those dipstick lesbians?

I believe it's called lipstick lesbian.

Yes, and I would be a chapstick lesbian.

So, um... So what goes on around here,
then?

I don't know. I guess it's like any
other support group. People sit around

circle and blame each other until
everybody cries.

I don't think being gay is anything to
joke about.

Well, I'm sorry. I don't know what else
to do. I was scared, I was ashamed, and

now that it's out... You know what? It's
funny.

Yeah, but it isn't to me.

I know. I'm sorry. It's just... It's not
some horrible secret either, you know?

And that's why we're here, to discuss
this with other people that are going

through the same thing. Oh, no. I don't
intend to discuss anything.

Okay. All right. Well, so you'll just
sit and listen. Right. Okay.

I'm going to get some seats. All right.

I'm sorry. I just can't change the way I
am.

It's tough, isn't it? I just wish she
could respect my feelings. No, I know

you feel. Why can't my daughter just
accept that I'm gay?

There they are.

Hey, everybody, can I have your
attention?

We're going to take our seats, okay, and
get started.

I want to thank everybody for coming
here.

Who would like to get started today?

Oh, I would.

I just like to say that I am so proud of
my daughter, the lesbian.

You know, she and her lover came over
for dinner the other night, and it

raining really hard, and they were going
to drive home. And my husband and I

just said, no, you're staying here
tonight, missies.

We'll sleep in the den. You take the
master bedroom.

I just want you to know that scares me
as much as it scares you.

So we have some new faces here.

Yeah, hi.

I'm Ellen.

And I haven't had a heterosexual thought
in eight days.

I told her this wasn't something to joke
about, you know.

Amen.

And you are?

Heartbroken.

Confused.

Sad? I think she meant your name.

Lois. I'm Lois Ellington Morgan.

Mrs.

Lois Ellington Morgan.

Well, Lois, welcome.

Thank you. Do you have anything that
you'd like to say?

Well, I'd like to say that my daughter
is a gay.

I'm very proud of her. And we're proud
of you. No, wait. No.

No, that's what I'd like to say, but I
can't.

Because I really don't feel that way,
you see.

I... I really feel that this is all my
fault.

Lois, it is not your fault.

This is who she is.

But you're on a roll. Get it all out.

Well, sweetheart, I'm just... I worry
about you. I mean...

Life is going to be so hard for you now.

Lois, it's harder to live a lie than it
is to live your life openly and

honestly.

But keep going.

Okay.

Well, I'm just... I'm so confused, you
know. I mean, like, um...

What do two women do in bed together?

Okay, that's enough time. That's all
right. We don't need to hog the floor.

else wants to chat?

Honey, this just isn't what I wanted for
you.

I wanted you to find someone, someone
nice.

I want to find someone nice, too. It's
just not going to be a man.

Yeah, but honey, then I don't understand
who will take care of you.

I'm not a plant.

I can take care of myself.

You know, I'm looking at you right now,
and I really feel like I don't even know

you anymore.

I miss the old Ellen.

Which Ellen is that? The Ellen that used
to keep her feelings bottled up? The

Ellen that used to lie to herself and
everybody else? The Ellen that could

spent the rest of her life alone?

Yep, that's the one.

Well,

she's gone.

But you know who is here?

The Ellen that's a good daughter.

The Ellen that's always trying to do the
right thing.

The Ellen that speaks about herself in
third person.

The Ellen who just wants you to accept
her for who she is.

Okay, that's it. I'm out of here.

The only reason I came here tonight was
because I promised your mother I would.

And you.

Why should your mother accept this?

It's wrong.

It's sick.

And you're sick. Oh, wait, now, don't
you talk to my daughter that way.

She is not sick.

And sure, I'm not happy about this, but
I love her, and I don't want to lose

her. You tell him, Lois.

She here, she's queer.

Get used to it.

I read that on a bumper sticker.

I was just talking to that young woman
over there, and she's a doctor.

That's nice.

And she's available.

I'm not ready to start dating.

But she's a doctor.