All language subtitles for Ellen s04e19 Secrets & Ellen
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1
00:00:06,350 --> 00:00:10,670
Right, so it's a couple of bottles of
your best champagne and two ounces of
2
00:00:10,670 --> 00:00:11,670
beluga caviar.
3
00:00:12,710 --> 00:00:15,330
I'll make it four ounces. We'll make
sandwiches later.
4
00:00:16,970 --> 00:00:18,830
This place is unbelievable.
5
00:00:19,190 --> 00:00:21,970
Two jacuzzis, big screen TV, in the
bathroom.
6
00:00:22,470 --> 00:00:23,470
Yes. Yeah.
7
00:00:23,890 --> 00:00:24,890
It's quaint.
8
00:00:25,410 --> 00:00:27,710
Oh, my God, I'm dying. God damn it.
9
00:00:28,290 --> 00:00:29,290
Finally,
10
00:00:30,910 --> 00:00:32,430
I'm home.
11
00:00:33,000 --> 00:00:36,660
Listen, okay, I won't ask anymore, but
try global pictures. Pay for everything,
12
00:00:36,740 --> 00:00:40,280
right? Honor bar included. Big fluffy
bathrooms. Big screen TV.
13
00:00:40,780 --> 00:00:42,320
Spence, we can't take advantage.
14
00:00:42,700 --> 00:00:43,700
Enough said, enough said.
15
00:00:43,900 --> 00:00:47,760
Yeah, hi. Listen, could you also send up
a case of shampoo?
16
00:00:48,920 --> 00:00:50,880
Yeah, it doesn't matter. The most
expensive.
17
00:00:55,560 --> 00:00:58,060
Ladies and gentlemen, April Tatro and I
will stretch.
18
00:01:03,310 --> 00:01:04,310
Put it behind your head.
19
00:01:04,590 --> 00:01:05,590
Good.
20
00:01:06,930 --> 00:01:09,330
Great. And here we go.
21
00:01:10,030 --> 00:01:11,030
One leg.
22
00:01:11,230 --> 00:01:12,250
The other leg.
23
00:01:13,210 --> 00:01:14,490
And up.
24
00:01:15,190 --> 00:01:16,190
Up.
25
00:01:20,930 --> 00:01:21,930
Show off.
26
00:01:36,940 --> 00:01:37,940
Where'd you learn to do that?
27
00:01:38,340 --> 00:01:42,560
Oh, I worked as a poker dealer in Vegas
for a while, but I got fired.
28
00:01:42,980 --> 00:01:43,818
How come?
29
00:01:43,820 --> 00:01:45,860
I don't know. I never figured that one
out.
30
00:01:46,060 --> 00:01:47,060
Oh, good.
31
00:01:48,700 --> 00:01:49,679
Oh, hi.
32
00:01:49,680 --> 00:01:50,820
Hi. How are you doing?
33
00:01:51,080 --> 00:01:52,400
What are you doing here?
34
00:01:52,640 --> 00:01:56,360
Not that you need a reason to be here. I
mean, it's always nice to see you. What
35
00:01:56,360 --> 00:01:57,360
do you want?
36
00:01:57,900 --> 00:02:01,660
Well, when your grandmother comes.
Grammy's coming to visit? Oh, didn't I
37
00:02:01,660 --> 00:02:04,440
you? I thought I told you. Oh, well,
let's not dwell on that.
38
00:02:05,080 --> 00:02:08,259
Um, anyway, when she comes, would it be
all right if she stayed with you?
39
00:02:08,539 --> 00:02:10,620
Oh, let me think about it. No.
40
00:02:11,260 --> 00:02:15,460
Oh, honey. She's just so critical and
judgmental, and she's always rolling her
41
00:02:15,460 --> 00:02:17,420
eyes, and she has those disapproving
noises.
42
00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:18,339
Uh -uh.
43
00:02:18,340 --> 00:02:19,340
Oh,
44
00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:23,720
come on. With the separation, it's just
not a good time for us. Well, it's not a
45
00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:26,960
good time for me either. I mean, I have
inventory coming up, it's tax time, and
46
00:02:26,960 --> 00:02:28,840
I've got a jar full of pennies that
aren't going to roll themselves.
47
00:02:29,820 --> 00:02:31,820
Please, honey, it would make it so much
easier.
48
00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:33,959
All right.
49
00:02:33,960 --> 00:02:38,680
I'm going to have to shampoo the carpets
and clean the drapes and get a guest
50
00:02:38,680 --> 00:02:41,920
towel. No, there won't be time for that.
Well, I'll make time. No, there won't
51
00:02:41,920 --> 00:02:44,540
be time for that. She'll be here in 45
minutes. But that's today.
52
00:02:45,440 --> 00:02:46,440
Thank you.
53
00:02:48,560 --> 00:02:52,540
Oh, and by the way, when your
grandmother gets here, just pretend your
54
00:02:52,540 --> 00:02:54,240
and I are still together. Okay, thanks.
Bye.
55
00:02:55,120 --> 00:02:57,340
Lois Ellington Morgan, you get back here
right now.
56
00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:07,160
tell her the truth, it'll be nothing but
lectures and I told you so's and Bible
57
00:03:07,160 --> 00:03:12,020
stories and... Come on, what she doesn't
know won't hurt her.
58
00:03:12,740 --> 00:03:16,000
All right, if that's the kind of
relationship you want to have with your
59
00:03:17,660 --> 00:03:19,360
You just don't understand.
60
00:03:20,680 --> 00:03:23,500
I mean, you're lucky you have me for a
mother.
61
00:03:34,470 --> 00:03:37,170
Spence Kobach, I am naked and I am
starting without you.
62
00:03:37,530 --> 00:03:39,990
I feel ridiculous. Do I have to wear
this thing?
63
00:03:40,470 --> 00:03:41,470
Mm -hmm.
64
00:03:44,990 --> 00:03:48,310
You know, if we were staying at the New
York, New York casino, we would have to
65
00:03:48,310 --> 00:03:50,610
be playing subway vigilante and crack
whore.
66
00:03:52,550 --> 00:03:56,510
Perhaps you'd feel differently, Emperor,
if your little slave girl poured you
67
00:03:56,510 --> 00:03:57,510
some champagne.
68
00:03:58,270 --> 00:03:59,810
Oh, well, you know, when in Rome.
69
00:04:08,520 --> 00:04:12,520
We don't watch bar -rated movies, and we
don't watch NYPD Blue.
70
00:04:13,160 --> 00:04:17,560
Oh, and by the way, by the way, your
father is not retired. In fact, he just
71
00:04:17,560 --> 00:04:18,560
a big promotion, okay?
72
00:04:19,620 --> 00:04:23,540
Why do you do this? Why do you have to
make up these stories to impress
73
00:04:23,540 --> 00:04:25,060
else? You should just be more confident.
74
00:04:26,740 --> 00:04:28,860
Grammy's going to be here any second.
I've got to finish putting these Jesus
75
00:04:28,860 --> 00:04:29,860
figurines out.
76
00:04:46,090 --> 00:04:47,090
Let you stay with me.
77
00:04:47,430 --> 00:04:51,070
So this is where you live.
78
00:04:51,430 --> 00:04:53,870
Yeah. Well, it's very nice.
79
00:04:54,770 --> 00:04:55,910
I'll dust later.
80
00:04:57,450 --> 00:04:59,110
Why do I have to stay here?
81
00:04:59,610 --> 00:05:02,050
I told you our place is being painted,
you know.
82
00:05:02,530 --> 00:05:06,530
Why don't you stop with the paint? I
mean, why not move? It's the ugliest
83
00:05:06,530 --> 00:05:07,530
I ever saw.
84
00:05:07,930 --> 00:05:13,050
All righty then. How about something
cold and chilly to drink? I have soda
85
00:05:13,050 --> 00:05:14,270
have juice. I have beer.
86
00:05:14,750 --> 00:05:15,750
Alcohol?
87
00:05:16,030 --> 00:05:18,330
You have alcohol in this house?
88
00:05:20,390 --> 00:05:22,350
Yes, but not mine.
89
00:05:22,870 --> 00:05:27,870
I actually took it from the guy across
the hall. I saw him and I broke in when
90
00:05:27,870 --> 00:05:28,990
he wasn't there and took it away.
91
00:05:29,530 --> 00:05:33,190
That is wrong. I'm trying to get all the
liquor from everyone. Can I get you a
92
00:05:33,190 --> 00:05:35,430
juice box?
93
00:05:35,810 --> 00:05:41,330
Why don't you come over here, sit next
to Grammy, and tell me all about your
94
00:05:41,330 --> 00:05:42,810
boyfriend? Boyfriend?
95
00:05:43,710 --> 00:05:44,850
Yes, Joe.
96
00:05:46,210 --> 00:05:47,530
Joe. Joe.
97
00:05:47,950 --> 00:05:49,590
Joe? Joe.
98
00:05:50,330 --> 00:05:51,930
Joe, of course, Joe.
99
00:05:52,250 --> 00:05:57,350
Well, tell me about him. All right, I
will. Yeah, his name is Joe, short for
100
00:05:57,350 --> 00:06:04,150
Joseph, and he is a hard worker, a hard
worker, and a wonderful peach
101
00:06:04,150 --> 00:06:09,890
farmer. And grows peaches, pitless
peaches, which is...
102
00:06:10,880 --> 00:06:16,620
They don't know how he does it. And some
are extra fuzzy and some are not so
103
00:06:16,620 --> 00:06:21,420
fuzzy. And very talented. I don't know
how he does it. And I try to get it out
104
00:06:21,420 --> 00:06:22,420
of him, you know.
105
00:06:26,600 --> 00:06:28,120
Oh, hey, Doc.
106
00:06:28,560 --> 00:06:30,640
So how is he? Is he okay?
107
00:06:30,900 --> 00:06:32,120
Is he going to be all right?
108
00:06:32,440 --> 00:06:34,700
Well, basically, he's got three lemons
showing.
109
00:06:34,980 --> 00:06:37,240
Unfortunately, they're just not all
lined up right now.
110
00:06:39,160 --> 00:06:40,200
I'm sorry, I...
111
00:06:40,560 --> 00:06:41,780
I don't really understand.
112
00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:45,840
Let me put this in layman terms for you,
Miss Clark. Okay. Just think of his
113
00:06:45,840 --> 00:06:49,680
brain as a roulette wheel. Right. Right
now, the ball is kind of bouncing
114
00:06:49,680 --> 00:06:52,820
around. It might land red. It might land
black. But it's going to land.
115
00:06:54,920 --> 00:06:55,719
I'm sorry.
116
00:06:55,720 --> 00:07:00,160
I'm still a little hazy. You've got two
aces and a five -deck shoe. I'll talk in
117
00:07:00,160 --> 00:07:01,160
English.
118
00:07:02,900 --> 00:07:04,240
He has a mild concussion.
119
00:07:04,580 --> 00:07:07,620
He's a little bit disoriented. He's
going to be fine. Just keep an eye on
120
00:07:08,820 --> 00:07:12,260
Great. I am going to need to know from
my report what happened, though.
121
00:07:13,040 --> 00:07:15,140
Oh. Um, okay.
122
00:07:16,100 --> 00:07:21,800
So, well, I was in the jacuzzi, and he
was just sort of, you know, walking
123
00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:24,040
around. Emperor and the slave girl.
124
00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:26,520
Great.
125
00:07:28,120 --> 00:07:32,880
I'm looking for your sign. Okay. You
know, I don't know if you ever hear
126
00:07:32,940 --> 00:07:36,180
but did anyone ever tell you that you
look a lot like Wayne Newton?
127
00:07:36,500 --> 00:07:37,500
No.
128
00:07:43,310 --> 00:07:44,310
Dr. Shade.
129
00:07:48,310 --> 00:07:54,710
Oh, another one. Thank you so much.
130
00:07:55,810 --> 00:07:56,810
Thanks.
131
00:07:58,270 --> 00:07:59,770
Boy, you can churn those out.
132
00:08:00,550 --> 00:08:01,550
Did you sleep well?
133
00:08:02,130 --> 00:08:05,010
That isn't what you're wearing to a
house of worship.
134
00:08:06,570 --> 00:08:08,950
House of worship? We're going to the
house of pant.
135
00:08:15,050 --> 00:08:20,290
Why don't you run along and change into
that dress I made you? The doryly one?
136
00:08:21,690 --> 00:08:28,130
Well, I would like to, but my church is
a little drafty, and I don't think the
137
00:08:28,130 --> 00:08:29,670
good Lord would want me to have chilly
legs.
138
00:08:34,890 --> 00:08:39,010
I'm so hungry, I cannot wait to stick my
teeth into some Belgian waffles. Oh, me
139
00:08:39,010 --> 00:08:42,470
too, and that'll be a nice treat for us
all when we finish going to church
140
00:08:42,470 --> 00:08:43,470
together as a family.
141
00:08:46,750 --> 00:08:51,050
Ellie, we haven't been to... Your
church? In a long time, why don't we go
142
00:08:52,470 --> 00:08:56,390
Oh, but, uh, your church is so much
nicer.
143
00:08:57,430 --> 00:08:59,330
Ellen's church is kind of drafty.
144
00:09:01,370 --> 00:09:06,080
But... Our church is clear across town,
and yours is so much closer.
145
00:09:07,620 --> 00:09:14,240
Really? Well, but my church just
recently had the big rat scare.
146
00:09:14,500 --> 00:09:18,140
And I don't think they got them all,
so...
147
00:09:18,140 --> 00:09:24,400
Well, better a rat scare than a
148
00:09:24,400 --> 00:09:27,080
radon leak at our church.
149
00:09:28,440 --> 00:09:30,660
Well, why don't we let...
150
00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:32,000
me decide.
151
00:09:32,780 --> 00:09:33,780
Huh?
152
00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:35,000
Rat church.
153
00:09:41,460 --> 00:09:46,580
This is your regular church, dear? Oh,
yeah. Every Sunday. Wouldn't miss it.
154
00:09:47,100 --> 00:09:49,020
Yeah. Got a haircut, huh?
155
00:09:50,140 --> 00:09:52,180
Only place I feel like I really fit in.
156
00:10:42,730 --> 00:10:43,990
at my church, and Joe, you're my
boyfriend.
157
00:10:44,530 --> 00:10:45,890
I prefer life, partner.
158
00:10:48,530 --> 00:10:53,550
Ellen, you know me. I can't lie. I'm a
terrible liar, especially... Hi, Grammy.
159
00:10:53,950 --> 00:10:54,950
I'm Audrey.
160
00:10:55,170 --> 00:10:59,190
Welcome to Ellen's bookstore, which she
owns and didn't sell.
161
00:11:01,150 --> 00:11:03,830
I thought you remodeled after the
earthquake.
162
00:11:04,470 --> 00:11:05,890
Oh, so you like it. Great.
163
00:11:13,320 --> 00:11:15,940
Wonderful to meet you. I just want you
to know that my intentions are
164
00:11:15,940 --> 00:11:19,300
honorable. Planning a big church
wedding, lots of kids. Isn't that right,
165
00:11:19,460 --> 00:11:20,960
Pumpkin? No, not in front of Grammy.
166
00:11:22,960 --> 00:11:23,960
Oh, God.
167
00:11:42,410 --> 00:11:45,530
I love you so much. I'm going to leave
right now and go get you some flowers.
168
00:11:45,630 --> 00:11:49,510
Oh, you know what? Just knowing you love
me that much is enough. Pookie pookie
169
00:11:49,510 --> 00:11:50,209
yum yum.
170
00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:55,050
My heart is so full.
171
00:11:55,730 --> 00:11:56,910
Where's the powder room?
172
00:11:57,610 --> 00:11:59,510
Right up the stairs and through the
door, Grammy.
173
00:12:00,470 --> 00:12:01,470
He's a keeper.
174
00:12:03,490 --> 00:12:05,950
A pony.
175
00:12:15,440 --> 00:12:18,080
She's your Grammy. She's not going to be
around forever.
176
00:12:18,400 --> 00:12:21,720
And after she's gone, the guilt is going
to eat your insides until you're
177
00:12:21,720 --> 00:12:23,920
nothing but bones and lies. Bones and
lies!
178
00:12:26,480 --> 00:12:30,140
Don't you pick on my honeybunch. She's
perfect just the way she is.
179
00:12:31,340 --> 00:12:32,340
Thank you, Joe.
180
00:12:32,860 --> 00:12:34,460
Now get your hand off my ass.
181
00:12:42,660 --> 00:12:43,880
Halt! Who goes there?
182
00:12:45,290 --> 00:12:45,989
Hey, little Caesar.
183
00:12:45,990 --> 00:12:46,990
Pizza here yet?
184
00:12:47,190 --> 00:12:48,190
I am not Caesar.
185
00:12:48,310 --> 00:12:49,570
I'm merely one of his loyal soldiers.
186
00:12:50,250 --> 00:12:51,530
Oh, you're into your job. That's good.
187
00:12:52,230 --> 00:12:53,230
Hey, listen.
188
00:12:53,390 --> 00:12:55,570
If you introduce me, I'll take over for
you at the Vomitarium tonight.
189
00:12:58,410 --> 00:12:59,410
Munich, huh?
190
00:12:59,490 --> 00:13:02,490
You should never look upon one of the
Emperor's handmaidens with lust for
191
00:13:04,910 --> 00:13:06,410
Beware the Ides of March.
192
00:13:07,090 --> 00:13:09,990
Oh, it's the Ides of March already? My
sundial must have stopped.
193
00:13:10,210 --> 00:13:11,730
I must warn Caesar. Which way to the
Appian Way?
194
00:13:12,130 --> 00:13:14,110
You just go to the nickel slots and make
a left. Can't miss it.
195
00:13:15,370 --> 00:13:18,850
The Oracle has proclaimed that Jupiter's
will must be done.
196
00:13:19,410 --> 00:13:20,870
Okay, you're a freak show.
197
00:13:26,590 --> 00:13:27,590
Hey,
198
00:13:30,850 --> 00:13:33,550
Grammy. You know, they say that no two
Dorleys are alike.
199
00:13:35,650 --> 00:13:37,890
Oh, my God, I hope they're right.
200
00:13:39,590 --> 00:13:41,630
Shouldn't we be leaving for dinner?
201
00:13:41,890 --> 00:13:44,130
Oh, dinner reservations aren't until
five.
202
00:13:44,670 --> 00:13:45,629
I forgot.
203
00:13:45,630 --> 00:13:48,330
I'm dining with the Let's Eat Lake
crowd.
204
00:13:50,590 --> 00:13:54,530
Well, I did try to get those 3 .30
reservations, but they were still
205
00:13:54,530 --> 00:13:55,530
lunch.
206
00:13:55,930 --> 00:13:59,430
I can't tell you how happy I am about
you and Joe.
207
00:13:59,650 --> 00:14:00,670
Oh, good, then don't.
208
00:14:02,470 --> 00:14:07,110
And since you're getting married soon, I
want you to have something that belongs
209
00:14:07,110 --> 00:14:09,010
to me. Your craftmatic adjustable bed?
210
00:14:10,910 --> 00:14:12,730
My engagement ring.
211
00:14:13,290 --> 00:14:16,990
My grandmother gave it to my mother, my
mother gave it to me, and I'm giving it
212
00:14:16,990 --> 00:14:17,549
to you.
213
00:14:17,550 --> 00:14:18,750
Well, why didn't you give it to Mom?
214
00:14:18,950 --> 00:14:19,970
I didn't want her to have it.
215
00:14:23,650 --> 00:14:28,890
I just hope that you and Joe are as
happy as your grandfather and I.
216
00:14:29,570 --> 00:14:30,670
God rest his soul.
217
00:14:31,250 --> 00:14:32,250
Grandpa's still alive.
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00:14:33,330 --> 00:14:34,330
Whatever.
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00:14:36,270 --> 00:14:40,890
You know, this is the only thing I still
have of my mother's, and I'm giving it
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00:14:40,890 --> 00:14:41,709
to you.
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00:14:41,710 --> 00:14:45,090
Oh, that, I can't take the ring, though.
I mean, how about the black and white
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00:14:45,090 --> 00:14:46,590
TV with the rabbit ears? Isn't that your
mother's?
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00:14:46,890 --> 00:14:51,850
You're the only one in the family who
deserves it. Would you hold still?
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00:14:53,790 --> 00:14:57,550
Oh, you know, I see so much of myself in
you, Ellen.
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00:14:57,970 --> 00:15:02,050
I mean, a God -fearing woman who runs
her own business and is madly in love
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00:15:02,050 --> 00:15:03,710
a handsome, hard -working man.
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00:15:05,550 --> 00:15:06,349
That's me.
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00:15:06,350 --> 00:15:09,530
God -fearing, hard -loving, business
-owning Ellen.
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00:15:17,360 --> 00:15:20,460
I thrice presented Caesar with a kingly
crown, which he did thrice refuse.
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00:15:21,460 --> 00:15:22,460
Well, you're precious.
231
00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:25,280
Are you one of those village people guys
that does this stuff? I'm from the
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00:15:25,280 --> 00:15:26,700
village, yes, the village of Rome.
233
00:15:27,540 --> 00:15:29,680
So it takes a village to raise an idiot,
huh?
234
00:15:32,100 --> 00:15:33,100
Excuse me.
235
00:15:43,380 --> 00:15:44,420
Have you seen Caesar?
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00:16:06,920 --> 00:16:10,260
Brutus loves thee not. Hey, I don't know
what kind of rumors are going around,
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00:16:10,360 --> 00:16:14,180
but Brutus and I are just good friends.
No, Caesar, you know, your life is in
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00:16:14,180 --> 00:16:17,380
great danger. Look, I'm not the regular
Caesar.
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00:16:17,820 --> 00:16:18,820
I'm just filling in.
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00:16:19,080 --> 00:16:20,080
No.
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00:16:20,360 --> 00:16:21,360
Caesar.
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00:16:21,920 --> 00:16:22,920
Hey,
243
00:16:27,260 --> 00:16:29,020
I've been looking all over you. Are you
okay?
244
00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:31,420
Fear not for me. Caesar's life is in
jeopardy.
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00:16:31,680 --> 00:16:34,140
What? Unhand me, you tart. I must say
Caesar.
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00:16:35,630 --> 00:16:38,170
Let's get you back to bed. Come on. What
would Mark Anthony do if he were here?
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00:16:39,010 --> 00:16:40,850
Cesar! My leash! My leash!
248
00:16:51,770 --> 00:16:52,770
That's disgusting.
249
00:16:55,250 --> 00:16:56,149
You're right.
250
00:16:56,150 --> 00:16:57,710
Hi, Grammy Rose. Mom. Dad.
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00:16:57,930 --> 00:17:00,930
Honey Bunch. What are you doing here? I
said that I didn't want to lie anymore.
252
00:17:01,130 --> 00:17:02,550
Don't worry. I have a plan.
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00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:08,640
I am so glad to spend time with you and
Joe. I can't wait for the day that I
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00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:09,640
dance at your wedding.
255
00:17:09,780 --> 00:17:12,540
Oh, well, how can I put this, Grammy?
256
00:17:13,579 --> 00:17:15,200
That's not going to happen.
257
00:17:15,540 --> 00:17:16,700
Hey, I'm not that old.
258
00:17:18,140 --> 00:17:20,140
No, that's not what I mean.
259
00:17:20,500 --> 00:17:21,800
Joe and I aren't getting married.
260
00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:25,560
Oh, no, you two broke up? Oh, how can
you even say a thing like that?
261
00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:29,540
No, we never were together. I lied to
you.
262
00:17:29,760 --> 00:17:33,260
You lied to me? Yes, I did, and there's
more.
263
00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:35,500
I don't still own the bookstore.
264
00:17:36,240 --> 00:17:39,400
I'm not a regular churchgoer, and I hate
doilies.
265
00:17:40,940 --> 00:17:44,000
How can you say that? I thought you
loved doilies.
266
00:17:45,480 --> 00:17:49,320
I said it there, and it wasn't as hard
as I thought, and I think that Grammy
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00:17:49,320 --> 00:17:51,320
respects me more for being truthful.
268
00:17:51,600 --> 00:17:52,920
Well, think again.
269
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:56,120
Lois, what do you have to say about
this?
270
00:17:56,360 --> 00:17:57,860
What do I have to say about this?
271
00:18:01,960 --> 00:18:05,840
brought you up better than this. I
cannot believe that you lied to us.
272
00:18:06,540 --> 00:18:11,960
You, Lois Ellington Morgan, daughter of
Rose Ellington, don't believe that I
273
00:18:11,960 --> 00:18:12,960
lied to my mother?
274
00:18:13,300 --> 00:18:14,300
Yes.
275
00:18:14,620 --> 00:18:15,760
Don't make me say that again.
276
00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:20,100
You, Lois Ellington... Okay, okay, okay,
for God's sake, stop it.
277
00:18:22,660 --> 00:18:25,300
Okay, Mom, I lied to you.
278
00:18:26,500 --> 00:18:27,500
Harold is retired.
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00:18:27,640 --> 00:18:28,640
He's not working anymore.
280
00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:38,480
one of them right now.
281
00:18:39,260 --> 00:18:41,440
It's not just about the work. Tell her
about the divorce.
282
00:18:42,860 --> 00:18:46,520
Divorce? Oh, just as I always predicted.
283
00:18:47,120 --> 00:18:52,400
I blame you for this, Lois. I always
told you you married beneath you.
284
00:18:52,820 --> 00:18:55,020
Not like your sister Fern.
285
00:18:55,240 --> 00:18:58,060
I am a lawyer. Fern married a baker.
286
00:18:58,960 --> 00:19:01,100
She told me he was a congressman.
287
00:19:04,910 --> 00:19:07,730
If there's one thing I cannot abide,
it's liars.
288
00:19:07,950 --> 00:19:08,950
Well, you know what?
289
00:19:09,550 --> 00:19:11,170
It's just kind of hard to tell you the
truth.
290
00:19:11,790 --> 00:19:14,590
I don't know if anyone has ever told you
this, but sometimes you come off as
291
00:19:14,590 --> 00:19:17,250
sort of a... What's the word?
292
00:19:18,010 --> 00:19:19,010
Bitch.
293
00:19:19,210 --> 00:19:20,430
Okay, you've had this discussion.
294
00:19:21,410 --> 00:19:24,630
There's still no reason to lie to me.
I've washed my hands of this entire
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00:19:24,630 --> 00:19:27,770
family. Okay, fine. Then I guess you
want your engagement ring back.
296
00:19:28,270 --> 00:19:32,870
Wait. You told me you lost that in our
bomb shelter. That was supposed to be
297
00:19:32,870 --> 00:19:33,870
mine.
298
00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:37,620
I was afraid to give it to you because I
thought you'd lose it faster than you
299
00:19:37,620 --> 00:19:39,580
lost your virginity to Tommy Hobbs.
300
00:19:45,160 --> 00:19:48,080
Lois, you weren't a virgin when you
married me?
301
00:19:48,300 --> 00:19:49,600
Oh, get real, Harold.
302
00:19:52,560 --> 00:19:57,200
Oh, well, look at us. What a family we
are. Three generations of liars. Well,
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00:19:57,360 --> 00:19:59,780
liar, liar, pants on fire.
304
00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:02,240
And it's time we put our pants out.
305
00:20:02,640 --> 00:20:03,640
You're here.
306
00:20:05,620 --> 00:20:06,620
I'm proud of you.
307
00:20:06,980 --> 00:20:07,980
Thank you, Joe.
308
00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:10,660
Now, for the last time, get your hand
off my ass.
309
00:20:12,340 --> 00:20:16,540
Mom, I'm really sorry about all the
lies.
310
00:20:17,860 --> 00:20:22,340
Well, I'm sorry that I made it so hard
for you to tell the truth.
311
00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:24,160
Here, this is yours.
312
00:20:24,820 --> 00:20:30,520
Oh, that's so sweet. Now, there you go.
That's a start for us.
313
00:20:31,820 --> 00:20:32,960
You cannot marry...
314
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:06,620
me to my chamber. I am unworthy of
escorting such a wonderful queen as
315
00:21:06,700 --> 00:21:07,780
Oh, blah, blah, blah. Come on, let's go.
316
00:21:08,420 --> 00:21:09,420
I'll be honored.
317
00:21:09,720 --> 00:21:12,980
So where have you been all night? Well,
I was almost subdued by infidels, but
318
00:21:12,980 --> 00:21:15,700
luckily I was able to inform Caesar of
the plot against his life.
319
00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:18,680
Oh, of course you did, because you're my
brave little soldier.
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00:21:19,760 --> 00:21:20,760
Let's go.
24351
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