All language subtitles for Diffrent Strokes s03e06 Substitute Mother
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1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:05,020
I've nothing but the genes, but they got
different strokes to take, different
2
00:00:05,020 --> 00:00:08,900
strokes to take, different strokes to
move the world.
3
00:00:10,660 --> 00:00:13,500
Everybody's got a special kind of story.
4
00:00:14,280 --> 00:00:16,680
Everybody finds a way to shine.
5
00:00:17,620 --> 00:00:23,300
We don't matter that you got not a lot.
So what? I'll have theirs, you'll have
6
00:00:23,300 --> 00:00:24,720
yours, and I'll have mine.
7
00:00:25,360 --> 00:00:28,080
And together we'll be fine today.
8
00:00:36,639 --> 00:00:40,040
See Adelaide, how are we going to manage
for three whole weeks without you?
9
00:00:40,220 --> 00:00:43,500
Yeah, we're sure going to miss you. I
miss you already and you're still here.
10
00:00:44,800 --> 00:00:47,560
I'm going to miss you guys too, but I
have to go.
11
00:00:48,200 --> 00:00:51,980
You know, my sister's lagging a cast and
her husband's out of town. She really
12
00:00:51,980 --> 00:00:53,760
needs me. Yeah, we understand.
13
00:00:54,100 --> 00:00:58,120
Yeah. But the girl who's filling in for
me, Sandra Williams, has very good
14
00:00:58,120 --> 00:01:00,800
references. And she sounded real nice on
the phone.
15
00:01:01,080 --> 00:01:03,180
Well, how can you tell about her cooking
over the phone?
16
00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:06,500
Without your fudge bronze and apple
fritters in three weeks, I'll be nothing
17
00:01:06,500 --> 00:01:07,500
cheeks and bones.
18
00:01:10,260 --> 00:01:12,920
You're all set, Adelaide. My chauffeur's
waiting for you downstairs.
19
00:01:13,360 --> 00:01:14,800
Thanks. I'm going in style.
20
00:01:15,080 --> 00:01:16,080
A limousine?
21
00:01:16,300 --> 00:01:17,300
To the bus station.
22
00:01:17,980 --> 00:01:19,440
Well, kids, this is it. Goodbye.
23
00:01:19,900 --> 00:01:20,900
Goodbye. Goodbye.
24
00:01:21,080 --> 00:01:22,480
Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye.
Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye.
25
00:01:22,680 --> 00:01:23,680
Goodbye. Goodbye.
26
00:01:24,020 --> 00:01:24,878
Goodbye. Goodbye.
27
00:01:24,880 --> 00:01:25,880
Goodbye.
28
00:01:43,470 --> 00:01:46,710
I'll call up to make sure everything's
going all right. Okay, bye -bye. Have a
29
00:01:46,710 --> 00:01:47,568
good trip.
30
00:01:47,570 --> 00:01:49,830
If you get too busy, just send a candy
gram.
31
00:01:53,810 --> 00:01:55,190
I thought she'd never leave.
32
00:01:56,930 --> 00:01:59,450
Sondra, it's very nice to have you with
us. Thank you. This is my family,
33
00:01:59,550 --> 00:02:01,430
Kimberly, Willis, and Arnold.
34
00:02:01,690 --> 00:02:05,190
Hi. How you doing? What a lovely family.
Adelaide told me all about you when we
35
00:02:05,190 --> 00:02:06,390
spoke. Thank you.
36
00:02:06,890 --> 00:02:08,669
Welcome to our humble commode.
37
00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:13,880
I think you mean abode.
38
00:02:14,620 --> 00:02:15,740
Commode refers to the bathroom.
39
00:02:16,220 --> 00:02:17,500
Oh, welcome to that, too.
40
00:02:20,540 --> 00:02:22,200
You are such a cutie pie.
41
00:02:25,640 --> 00:02:28,360
Come on, Sondra, and I'll show you to
your room. Willis, will you help with
42
00:02:28,360 --> 00:02:29,540
suitcase, please? I got it.
43
00:02:34,620 --> 00:02:37,860
You can take it now, Willis. I just
wanted to see if it was too heavy for
44
00:02:47,240 --> 00:02:48,240
Nothing to it.
45
00:02:48,660 --> 00:02:51,740
Do you eat most of your meals in here?
46
00:02:52,340 --> 00:02:54,380
Well, Dad, Willis and I eat our meals in
here.
47
00:02:54,600 --> 00:02:56,540
With Arnold, you can't exactly call it
eating.
48
00:02:57,240 --> 00:03:02,440
It's more like a... Well, you ever seen
a plague of locusts?
49
00:03:03,500 --> 00:03:04,640
I'll see you later, Sandra.
50
00:03:06,740 --> 00:03:10,620
Sandra, let me give you a tour of the
most important thing in the kitchen.
51
00:03:10,920 --> 00:03:11,739
What's that?
52
00:03:11,740 --> 00:03:12,740
The refrigerator.
53
00:03:13,480 --> 00:03:14,860
Notice it's king size.
54
00:03:18,060 --> 00:03:21,440
A king -size refrigerator for a little
boy with king -size cheeks.
55
00:03:22,340 --> 00:03:25,240
Can I pinch him? Sure, be my guest.
Pinch away.
56
00:03:26,760 --> 00:03:27,760
Hey,
57
00:03:28,520 --> 00:03:32,600
that didn't even hurt. You're a pain
-free pincher. And you're a darling
58
00:03:32,600 --> 00:03:33,680
dude. I am?
59
00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:37,980
Well, how about we make some popcorn?
60
00:03:38,220 --> 00:03:39,220
I'll get the popcorn.
61
00:03:39,380 --> 00:03:42,380
Sorry, no popcorn before lunch. You
should eat a balanced diet.
62
00:03:42,940 --> 00:03:45,260
I do eat a balanced diet. Have food.
63
00:03:56,650 --> 00:03:57,650
Did you hurt yourself?
64
00:03:58,070 --> 00:03:59,810
I think I bumped my elbow.
65
00:04:02,190 --> 00:04:03,910
Let me kiss it better.
66
00:04:05,210 --> 00:04:06,210
Is that better?
67
00:04:06,430 --> 00:04:09,530
Yeah, it feels great now. That's my
pitching arm. Good.
68
00:04:09,750 --> 00:04:11,430
Oh, don't forget my catching arm.
69
00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:12,710
Oh, of course.
70
00:04:13,610 --> 00:04:14,409
How's that?
71
00:04:14,410 --> 00:04:17,370
Great. And that's my shoulders. They
hold my arms together.
72
00:04:19,589 --> 00:04:21,029
You are something else.
73
00:04:21,510 --> 00:04:23,630
Hey, that's what my mama used to say to
me.
74
00:04:24,070 --> 00:04:25,070
You know something?
75
00:04:25,740 --> 00:04:27,120
He can remind me of my mama.
76
00:04:27,820 --> 00:04:28,940
That is so sweet.
77
00:04:29,380 --> 00:04:32,340
And when I get married, I'd like to have
a little boy just like you.
78
00:04:37,320 --> 00:04:39,720
Sandra, these are for the cleaners.
79
00:04:40,200 --> 00:04:43,100
Would you please tell them that I would
like the hole in that sweater mended?
80
00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:47,240
My golf partners are complaining that
that gives me an unfair advantage.
81
00:04:47,740 --> 00:04:48,740
How's that?
82
00:04:48,760 --> 00:04:50,000
Well, I start with a hole in one.
83
00:04:58,000 --> 00:05:00,580
The College Hill Atlanta gang goes
camping.
84
00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:05,140
I have to spend more time with these
people outside of the house. But this
85
00:05:05,140 --> 00:05:09,000
your typical road trip. Girls, guys,
bears, and gunshots. Oh, my.
86
00:05:09,480 --> 00:05:12,560
Catching all new College Hill Atlanta,
Tuesday at 10.
87
00:05:13,760 --> 00:05:15,080
Did you do your taxes yet?
88
00:05:17,060 --> 00:05:18,880
Nope. We gotta get them done.
89
00:05:19,220 --> 00:05:20,860
If I could... Wait.
90
00:05:21,480 --> 00:05:22,480
Yeah.
91
00:05:24,510 --> 00:05:29,110
Fortunately, there's the federal free
edition at TurboTax .com. Oh, this bad
92
00:05:29,110 --> 00:05:32,450
is thick, man. You like this, right?
This is bigger than my apartment.
93
00:05:32,890 --> 00:05:34,090
So what about insurance, man?
94
00:05:34,550 --> 00:05:38,710
I'm with... What are you, 19?
95
00:05:39,190 --> 00:05:40,410
Man, get some grown man insurance.
96
00:05:40,810 --> 00:05:44,670
It's time to step up. Your choice auto
insurance, only from Allstate. More
97
00:05:44,670 --> 00:05:46,870
protection, more rewards, starting day
one.
98
00:05:47,190 --> 00:05:50,050
Whether you have an accident or not.
Stop! Yo!
99
00:05:51,090 --> 00:05:52,790
See, that could raise your rates with...
100
00:05:53,200 --> 00:05:54,780
You deserve more from your insurance.
101
00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:56,020
That's all, State Stand.
102
00:05:56,280 --> 00:05:57,420
Are you in good hands?
103
00:05:58,560 --> 00:06:02,560
These are our neighbors, and they
deserve a great lunch at a great price.
104
00:06:02,560 --> 00:06:06,960
Applebee's pick -and -pair lunch combos
starting at $5 .99. Choose from over 60
105
00:06:06,960 --> 00:06:11,660
combinations of soups, salads,
sandwiches, and pastas. Only at
106
00:06:11,660 --> 00:06:12,740
a whole new neighborhood.
107
00:06:15,500 --> 00:06:18,920
From the time you were a kid.
108
00:06:22,570 --> 00:06:23,710
You've always known how to roll.
109
00:06:28,550 --> 00:06:29,990
Welcome to the next level.
110
00:06:30,650 --> 00:06:35,810
The all -new, redesigned 2009 Corolla. A
whisper -quiet cabin, Bluetooth
111
00:06:35,810 --> 00:06:40,590
capability, MP3, and satellite ready.
Your ride for the journey up.
112
00:06:41,710 --> 00:06:42,710
Keep rolling.
113
00:06:43,010 --> 00:06:47,890
Right now, Proactive Solution has good
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114
00:06:47,890 --> 00:06:49,710
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115
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118
00:07:00,260 --> 00:07:01,260
It's dramatic.
119
00:07:01,500 --> 00:07:05,380
Instead of hoping for an answer, use the
mask, and you've got it.
120
00:07:05,620 --> 00:07:07,840
I use the mask for spot treatment
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121
00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:11,320
You know, I put it on in the evening
before I go to bed, and when I wake up
122
00:07:11,320 --> 00:07:14,280
the morning, you don't have acne, and,
you know, that's a good feeling.
123
00:07:14,520 --> 00:07:16,740
It works the fastest. It's potent.
124
00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:19,440
That's what I tell people. It's like my
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129
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:36,320
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do the things that I want to be doing
130
00:07:36,320 --> 00:07:38,360
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151
00:08:43,080 --> 00:08:46,060
On the next Iron Ring, Luda picks his
fighters.
152
00:08:46,820 --> 00:08:52,240
In all news, Iron Ring. See who goes
hard and see who goes home. Tuesday at
153
00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:56,000
1030. Today, parents have a lot of hard
choices.
154
00:08:56,340 --> 00:08:58,540
Pay the phone bill or pay the doctor.
155
00:08:58,780 --> 00:09:00,980
Fill the fridge or fill a prescription.
156
00:09:01,680 --> 00:09:03,860
But there's a choice that can make life
easy.
157
00:09:04,160 --> 00:09:06,240
calling 1 -877 -KIDS -NOW.
158
00:09:06,500 --> 00:09:10,400
That's because every state now offers
low -cost and free health coverage for
159
00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:14,480
kids. Even working families can get the
card for doctor visits, prescriptions,
160
00:09:14,500 --> 00:09:15,099
and more.
161
00:09:15,100 --> 00:09:19,120
So if your kids aren't insured, call 1
-877 -KIDS -NOW.
162
00:09:19,400 --> 00:09:22,720
Write it down, because you've got enough
to worry about.
163
00:09:42,969 --> 00:09:48,850
I made $5 ,000 yesterday.
164
00:09:49,270 --> 00:09:52,650
Crazy? I don't think so. Log on now.
165
00:09:55,400 --> 00:09:57,340
Boy, wait till you meet Sandra.
166
00:09:57,680 --> 00:09:59,060
What a terrific smile.
167
00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:00,820
She must have a hundred teeth.
168
00:10:01,820 --> 00:10:03,520
She called me cutie pie.
169
00:10:04,320 --> 00:10:05,500
Just like Mama.
170
00:10:08,980 --> 00:10:13,460
Abraham, what if Sandra became our Mama?
171
00:10:13,960 --> 00:10:15,100
Wouldn't that be terrific?
172
00:10:15,540 --> 00:10:16,840
Is this a private conversation?
173
00:10:17,520 --> 00:10:18,640
Oh, Willis.
174
00:10:19,340 --> 00:10:21,280
Maybe you can help me with a problem.
It's about love.
175
00:10:21,680 --> 00:10:23,500
Love? Hey, brother, I wrote the book.
176
00:10:26,280 --> 00:10:29,000
Willis, what makes a man fall in love
with a woman?
177
00:10:29,480 --> 00:10:32,320
Well, first off, there's got to be this
physical attraction.
178
00:10:32,900 --> 00:10:36,660
Then there's this emotional thing. And
it doesn't hurt if she has season
179
00:10:36,660 --> 00:10:37,660
to all the ballgames.
180
00:10:39,600 --> 00:10:42,140
Willis, can someone fall in love in
three weeks? Sure.
181
00:10:42,700 --> 00:10:45,780
Something will fall in love at first
sight. At least that's what happens to
182
00:10:45,780 --> 00:10:46,800
girls when they look at me.
183
00:10:49,450 --> 00:10:51,990
How do you think they call me Knock 'em
Dead Jackson?
184
00:10:53,650 --> 00:10:55,030
I thought it was your breath.
185
00:10:58,870 --> 00:11:01,790
Speaking of breath, how would you like
to lose yours?
186
00:11:02,350 --> 00:11:04,010
You wouldn't hit a kid with glasses,
would you?
187
00:11:05,810 --> 00:11:09,730
Look, Colonel, when you mix the right
people together, anything can happen,
188
00:11:09,730 --> 00:11:14,150
marriage. But don't worry, I won't let
you get hooked by any girl. Oh, Willis,
189
00:11:14,190 --> 00:11:17,370
I'm not talking about any girl. I'm
talking about Sandra.
190
00:11:17,970 --> 00:11:18,970
Say what?
191
00:11:20,910 --> 00:11:21,910
Stop dreaming.
192
00:11:22,290 --> 00:11:24,730
Sandra's not going to marry a guy she
can pick up and carry around.
193
00:11:28,130 --> 00:11:30,890
Wallace, when was the last time you had
your brain tuned up?
194
00:11:31,830 --> 00:11:35,430
I'm not talking about me. I'm talking
about Sandra and Dad.
195
00:11:36,650 --> 00:11:39,270
Dad, you've been blow -drying your hair
too much.
196
00:11:42,410 --> 00:11:46,470
Wallace, doesn't Sandra remind you of
someone, especially when she smiles?
197
00:11:47,670 --> 00:11:49,930
I don't know, Arnold. I never thought
about it.
198
00:11:50,410 --> 00:11:51,750
And the way she smells.
199
00:11:52,550 --> 00:11:54,150
Who does she remind you of, Arnold?
200
00:11:56,230 --> 00:11:57,230
Mama.
201
00:11:57,890 --> 00:11:58,890
Mama?
202
00:12:00,130 --> 00:12:01,310
Hey, yeah.
203
00:12:01,850 --> 00:12:02,850
Yeah, anyway.
204
00:12:04,050 --> 00:12:05,990
Wouldn't it be nice to have a mama
again?
205
00:12:06,530 --> 00:12:08,870
And all Dad has to do is marry Sandra.
206
00:12:09,730 --> 00:12:14,210
Arnold, I don't think Dad's going to
marry her. He only knows her. They're
207
00:12:14,210 --> 00:12:15,210
different backgrounds.
208
00:12:15,450 --> 00:12:17,350
And in case you haven't noticed, she's
black.
209
00:12:17,690 --> 00:12:21,200
So? Dad fell in love with us, and we're
not exactly Snow White.
210
00:12:24,320 --> 00:12:26,840
Arnold, I'm not saying it could never
happen.
211
00:12:27,620 --> 00:12:28,860
They have nothing in common.
212
00:12:29,500 --> 00:12:30,500
Sure they do.
213
00:12:30,900 --> 00:12:31,900
Like what?
214
00:12:32,760 --> 00:12:35,720
I bet neither one of them want to go
skydiving without a parachute.
215
00:12:37,480 --> 00:12:38,480
Come here, little brother.
216
00:12:40,040 --> 00:12:43,220
Listen, I know you miss Mama, and I miss
her, too.
217
00:12:43,880 --> 00:12:47,120
Last Mother's Day, I went to the store
and looked at all the Mother's Day
218
00:12:47,360 --> 00:12:48,560
I almost bought one.
219
00:12:48,830 --> 00:12:49,890
Well, what would I have done with it?
220
00:12:51,110 --> 00:12:53,090
You could have put it in the drawer with
the one I bought.
221
00:12:53,850 --> 00:12:54,870
Oh, you too, huh?
222
00:12:55,590 --> 00:12:57,190
I guess we'll never forget Mama.
223
00:12:57,670 --> 00:12:58,730
Hey, I know it's hard.
224
00:12:59,730 --> 00:13:00,890
Will it ever get easier?
225
00:13:01,410 --> 00:13:03,990
I don't know, Arnold, but it don't help
to kid ourselves.
226
00:13:04,790 --> 00:13:08,430
Sure, Sandra will make a nice Mama, but
forget it, okay?
227
00:13:18,890 --> 00:13:20,150
I don't care what Willis says.
228
00:13:20,690 --> 00:13:23,470
I got three weeks before Adelaide comes
back.
229
00:13:23,930 --> 00:13:27,430
I don't know how I'm going to do it, but
I'm going to get Sandra to fall in love
230
00:13:27,430 --> 00:13:28,430
with Dad.
231
00:13:28,870 --> 00:13:31,330
You can come to the wedding. You can be
best fish.
232
00:13:36,170 --> 00:13:40,710
Carrying cash can be a hassle, but with
my new Walmart money card, controlling
233
00:13:40,710 --> 00:13:41,710
my money is easy.
234
00:13:41,970 --> 00:13:43,830
I simply load it with cash.
235
00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:48,420
or by cashing my paycheck, and then I
use it anywhere Visa debit card is
236
00:13:48,420 --> 00:13:49,420
accepted.
237
00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:54,080
Now I only spend what I have. When the
money runs out, I just reload it.
238
00:13:54,520 --> 00:13:58,880
No credit check and no bank account
required. The new Walmart money card.
239
00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:02,580
reloadable prepaid Visa card. Save
money. Live better. Walmart.
240
00:14:10,560 --> 00:14:11,560
Thanks.
241
00:14:12,360 --> 00:14:13,360
Have a nice day.
242
00:14:22,480 --> 00:14:25,840
Life comes at you fast, and then it hits
you. Is my car insurance any good?
243
00:14:27,620 --> 00:14:31,680
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244
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245
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246
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247
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Plus, get a free Nationwide On Your Side
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248
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249
00:14:48,880 --> 00:14:51,820
And don't forget about the whole $500
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250
00:14:52,250 --> 00:14:55,210
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251
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252
00:14:58,490 --> 00:15:02,430
Better call for better coverage. 1 -888
-891 -0031.
253
00:15:02,950 --> 00:15:04,530
Nationwide is on your side.
254
00:15:09,810 --> 00:15:11,310
Billy's got an Oreo cake there.
255
00:15:11,530 --> 00:15:13,550
Billy's got an Oreo cake there.
256
00:15:15,410 --> 00:15:19,830
Bobby's got his first chest hair. Oreo
cake -sters, this is big.
257
00:15:23,240 --> 00:15:24,240
Small spaces.
258
00:15:24,380 --> 00:15:25,380
Big impression.
259
00:15:25,560 --> 00:15:26,680
Just one click.
260
00:15:26,900 --> 00:15:31,320
Sharpie Retractable. Now in ultra -fine.
The only marker that scores for David
261
00:15:31,320 --> 00:15:32,320
Beckham.
262
00:15:32,740 --> 00:15:34,420
Sharpie. Right out loud.
263
00:15:35,420 --> 00:15:36,420
Dollar's down again.
264
00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:38,460
It's just in free fall.
265
00:15:38,780 --> 00:15:42,400
Double cheeseburger from the dollar
menu. Dollar's looking strong.
266
00:15:42,720 --> 00:15:44,020
Dollar's looking good.
267
00:15:44,500 --> 00:15:48,220
The McDonald's Beefy Cheesy Double
Cheeseburger. Just one of the
268
00:15:48,220 --> 00:15:49,220
choices on the dollar menu.
269
00:15:51,020 --> 00:15:52,280
Did you do your taxes yet?
270
00:15:54,280 --> 00:15:56,100
Nope. We've got to get them done.
271
00:15:56,460 --> 00:15:58,080
If I could... Wait.
272
00:15:58,820 --> 00:16:00,700
Yeah. Yeah.
273
00:16:01,580 --> 00:16:05,080
Fortunately, there's the federal free
edition at TurboTax .com.
274
00:16:08,400 --> 00:16:09,920
We would like to play.
275
00:16:14,340 --> 00:16:17,940
Introducing the ultimate Wii throwdown.
Gather your friends. Invite the whole
276
00:16:17,940 --> 00:16:22,280
family as the biggest characters in
gaming history come together for the
277
00:16:22,280 --> 00:16:23,280
to end them all.
278
00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:28,880
Super Smash Brothers Ball.
279
00:16:29,500 --> 00:16:30,500
Ready team for team.
280
00:16:35,340 --> 00:16:37,460
You ready? I'm not fighting. I think you
are.
281
00:16:37,740 --> 00:16:39,220
Critics are calling Never Back Down.
282
00:16:39,500 --> 00:16:43,280
A total knockout. Don't stop this yet.
People who come here for the wrong
283
00:16:43,280 --> 00:16:46,820
reasons never last. It's a winner. This
is my fight. Go win this.
284
00:16:47,040 --> 00:16:49,120
Never Back Down. Ready PD 13.
285
00:16:49,440 --> 00:16:50,419
Now playing.
286
00:16:50,420 --> 00:16:51,440
Dad? Yeah?
287
00:16:51,800 --> 00:16:52,820
Dad? Wait a minute.
288
00:16:53,300 --> 00:16:55,780
Get a second. Well, I'm just on my way
to the health club.
289
00:16:56,120 --> 00:16:57,120
Can it wait?
290
00:16:57,210 --> 00:16:58,430
Well, it's real important.
291
00:16:58,630 --> 00:16:59,630
I need help with my homework.
292
00:17:00,790 --> 00:17:02,590
Well, in that case, sure.
293
00:17:02,890 --> 00:17:03,890
Okay.
294
00:17:04,310 --> 00:17:05,310
What's the subject?
295
00:17:05,869 --> 00:17:06,869
Marriage.
296
00:17:07,470 --> 00:17:08,550
What is it you want to know?
297
00:17:08,910 --> 00:17:12,170
Okay, question number one. When you were
married, did you like it?
298
00:17:13,050 --> 00:17:14,050
Very much.
299
00:17:14,069 --> 00:17:15,190
He dug it.
300
00:17:18,210 --> 00:17:19,550
Would you ever get married again?
301
00:17:20,210 --> 00:17:21,210
I think so.
302
00:17:21,329 --> 00:17:22,329
Yes.
303
00:17:23,179 --> 00:17:24,579
Ready to take the plunge.
304
00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:28,500
Of course, that's only if I found the
right woman.
305
00:17:29,140 --> 00:17:30,140
Looking for a tin.
306
00:17:33,460 --> 00:17:36,300
Well, I'd settle for a nine and a half.
307
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:41,700
The truth is, Arnold, I really miss
being married.
308
00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:43,600
Getting desperate.
309
00:17:46,730 --> 00:17:49,450
Well, I'm not exactly dragging women out
of singles bars.
310
00:17:50,350 --> 00:17:54,770
But it would be nice to have someone I
love by my side to talk to and share
311
00:17:54,770 --> 00:17:56,810
and blame things on.
312
00:17:58,510 --> 00:18:00,250
Would you marry someone younger than
you?
313
00:18:00,490 --> 00:18:01,970
Certainly. Smarter than you?
314
00:18:02,210 --> 00:18:03,630
Gladly. Blacker than you?
315
00:18:09,810 --> 00:18:10,810
Blacker than me?
316
00:18:12,230 --> 00:18:13,630
Well, I've never thought about it.
317
00:18:14,350 --> 00:18:17,930
But I suppose if two people really love
each other, that's the important thing.
318
00:18:18,250 --> 00:18:20,190
Thank you. He made a very wise choice.
319
00:18:22,950 --> 00:18:24,050
What wise choice?
320
00:18:24,510 --> 00:18:28,630
Oh, answering my questions. He did very
good. Thank you. Keep up the good work.
321
00:18:31,810 --> 00:18:33,930
Oh, hi, Sandra. Where are you going?
322
00:18:34,170 --> 00:18:35,870
I'm just to the market for some
groceries.
323
00:18:36,450 --> 00:18:37,450
Oh, may I help?
324
00:18:37,710 --> 00:18:38,970
Groceries are my favorite dish.
325
00:18:39,650 --> 00:18:42,710
No, thanks, PewDiePie, but it's nice of
you to offer. You are a real little
326
00:18:42,710 --> 00:18:44,090
gentleman. Oh, thanks.
327
00:18:44,330 --> 00:18:46,050
I learned all that polite stuff from
Dad.
328
00:18:46,330 --> 00:18:47,650
He's a real considerate millionaire.
329
00:18:48,050 --> 00:18:52,530
Oh, a considerate millionaire. Those are
two of my favorite qualities in a man.
330
00:18:53,830 --> 00:18:56,130
Yeah, but I feel sorry for the poor guy.
331
00:18:56,790 --> 00:18:58,950
It's lonely at the top. What do you
mean?
332
00:18:59,630 --> 00:19:03,510
Well, tonight me, Kimberly, and Willis
are going out. That means Dad will have
333
00:19:03,510 --> 00:19:04,610
to eat dinner all by himself.
334
00:19:04,910 --> 00:19:08,270
Well, that isn't such a tragedy, is it?
Oh, you don't know, Sandra. He's been
335
00:19:08,270 --> 00:19:09,270
real depressed lately.
336
00:19:09,650 --> 00:19:10,650
Is that so?
337
00:19:11,150 --> 00:19:14,660
He's certainly high. it very well. Yep,
that's my dad.
338
00:19:14,920 --> 00:19:18,180
Laughing on the outside, but inside he's
crying his guts out.
339
00:19:20,360 --> 00:19:25,380
Well, I guess I just have to cancel our
plans and disappoint Timber and Willis
340
00:19:25,380 --> 00:19:27,260
unless... Unless what?
341
00:19:27,940 --> 00:19:30,700
Unless maybe you could have dinner with
Dad.
342
00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:35,100
Me? Oh, no. I don't think he'd want to
have dinner with the housekeeper.
343
00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:37,980
Does Adelaide have dinner with your dad?
344
00:19:45,610 --> 00:19:47,610
I'm going to make him feel better.
Please, please, please.
345
00:19:47,910 --> 00:19:48,910
Okay, okay, okay.
346
00:19:49,570 --> 00:19:53,110
If you think it'll cheer him up. Thank
you. Oh, and incidentally, do you know
347
00:19:53,110 --> 00:19:54,110
any jokes?
348
00:19:54,490 --> 00:19:58,710
Jokes? Oh, Dad loves jokes. He has some
of the funniest dinners around here.
349
00:19:58,950 --> 00:20:01,710
I guess I could think of a couple. Oh,
thanks.
350
00:20:02,110 --> 00:20:04,310
Oh, could you dance with him between
courses?
351
00:20:08,330 --> 00:20:09,330
Dance with him?
352
00:20:09,550 --> 00:20:12,410
Yeah, it helps his indigestion. It keeps
him from belching.
353
00:20:29,029 --> 00:20:30,029
Oh, sure.
354
00:20:30,090 --> 00:20:32,510
All the time. You should see my dad get
down.
355
00:20:33,650 --> 00:20:36,050
Your dad sure is a little unusual.
356
00:20:36,770 --> 00:20:40,570
Well, that's because we live on the top
floor. The air is very thin up here.
357
00:20:41,750 --> 00:20:43,470
Well, I guess if that's what he's like.
358
00:20:44,010 --> 00:20:46,130
Okay. Oh, and do you have a red dress?
359
00:20:47,370 --> 00:20:49,210
Don't tell me. That's his favorite
color.
360
00:20:49,410 --> 00:20:51,250
Yeah, how'd you get? Oh, just a wild
shot.
361
00:20:51,650 --> 00:20:54,990
Oh, and could you make his favorite
dessert crepes and wear a flower?
362
00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:58,680
I was just about to suggest it. Thank
you, Sandra.
363
00:20:59,100 --> 00:21:02,580
Oh, and incidentally, don't tell Dad I
told you all this, because he'd be kind
364
00:21:02,580 --> 00:21:03,580
of embarrassed.
365
00:21:03,700 --> 00:21:05,660
Okay, I understand. I think.
366
00:21:06,340 --> 00:21:08,640
I'd do anything for you, cutie pie.
367
00:21:09,320 --> 00:21:10,440
Good. Good!
368
00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:12,440
Hi,
369
00:21:14,420 --> 00:21:17,480
guys. You want to go roller skating with
me tonight? I'm paying.
370
00:21:18,240 --> 00:21:19,240
You are paying.
371
00:21:19,620 --> 00:21:20,980
Willis, I think he's delirious.
372
00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:29,060
I think we better say yes, Kimberly,
before he discovers he's sleepwalking.
373
00:21:30,480 --> 00:21:32,220
Okay, but when are my skate wheels
loose?
374
00:21:32,540 --> 00:21:34,840
Oh, never fear. The fix -it man is here.
375
00:21:35,100 --> 00:21:36,100
Show it to him. Okay.
376
00:21:38,300 --> 00:21:39,360
Thanks, Willis. Sure.
377
00:21:44,600 --> 00:21:45,600
It's working, Abraham.
378
00:21:45,720 --> 00:21:48,480
It's working. We might be able to get
Craig to lose that away from my
379
00:21:54,740 --> 00:21:55,740
Hello.
380
00:21:56,180 --> 00:21:58,080
Oh, hi, Adelaide. How you doing?
381
00:21:58,460 --> 00:22:00,600
Fine. How are things on the home front?
382
00:22:01,120 --> 00:22:04,360
Oh, couldn't be better. No, sir,
everything's just fine.
383
00:22:04,780 --> 00:22:06,800
Sounds like you don't miss me at all,
Arnold.
384
00:22:07,120 --> 00:22:09,840
Oh, I do. My stomach's in mourning until
you get back.
385
00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:14,620
Well, you don't have to wait three
weeks, because I'm coming home tonight.
386
00:22:16,080 --> 00:22:17,400
What you talking about, Adelaide?
387
00:22:21,160 --> 00:22:23,640
My sister's husband got back from his
trip.
388
00:22:24,190 --> 00:22:28,090
So she doesn't need me to help her
anymore. I'm coming back on the next
389
00:22:28,510 --> 00:22:29,810
You can't do that, Adelaide.
390
00:22:30,110 --> 00:22:31,110
Why not?
391
00:22:31,330 --> 00:22:37,890
Well, what I mean is, you just barely
showed your face to your sister. I mean,
392
00:22:37,890 --> 00:22:40,610
why come back and show it to the people
who've been looking at it for years?
393
00:22:43,910 --> 00:22:46,430
Arnold, tell me something.
394
00:22:47,410 --> 00:22:48,930
How's Sandra doing there?
395
00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:58,600
Well, don't worry. I know of another job
that's open.
396
00:22:58,840 --> 00:22:59,840
Good. Take it.
397
00:23:00,700 --> 00:23:06,500
I mean, uh... Arnold, has your father
said anything to you about my job?
398
00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:09,480
Like my services are no longer required?
399
00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:10,879
No, Emily.
400
00:23:10,880 --> 00:23:12,480
Honest. I didn't say that.
401
00:23:12,680 --> 00:23:15,640
You didn't have to. I can hear between
the lines.
402
00:23:16,120 --> 00:23:20,440
The old gray mare ain't what she used to
be. And the young filly has moved into
403
00:23:20,440 --> 00:23:21,440
the stable.
404
00:24:02,830 --> 00:24:05,010
Good evening, Mr. Drummond. Good
evening, Sandra.
405
00:24:06,250 --> 00:24:07,750
My, don't you look lovely.
406
00:24:08,030 --> 00:24:09,030
Thank you.
407
00:24:09,450 --> 00:24:11,370
Red happens to be my favorite color.
408
00:24:11,610 --> 00:24:12,770
My, what a coincidence.
409
00:24:14,190 --> 00:24:16,710
I think that flower in your hair is a
very nice touch.
410
00:24:17,130 --> 00:24:19,970
Flower? Oh, yes, of course. I had
forgotten I had it there.
411
00:24:20,850 --> 00:24:22,250
Well, how come the table's set for two?
412
00:24:22,830 --> 00:24:26,370
The kids told me they were going to eat
at the roller rink. Did one of them come
413
00:24:26,370 --> 00:24:30,470
back? No, but I thought rather than eat
alone, you might like a little company.
414
00:24:32,580 --> 00:24:33,620
Oh, you mean you.
415
00:24:33,940 --> 00:24:34,940
If you don't mind.
416
00:24:35,800 --> 00:24:37,840
No, no, no, no. I wouldn't mind at all.
417
00:24:38,340 --> 00:24:41,040
I'd be delighted to have your company.
Allow me. Thank you.
418
00:24:47,820 --> 00:24:49,080
This salad is delicious.
419
00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:50,920
Thank you.
420
00:24:53,640 --> 00:24:54,900
Now to make a romantic.
421
00:25:02,830 --> 00:25:03,729
What happened?
422
00:25:03,730 --> 00:25:07,950
Well, either the circuit breaker went
out or I haven't paid the electric bill.
423
00:25:07,950 --> 00:25:08,529
better check.
424
00:25:08,530 --> 00:25:09,530
Excuse me.
425
00:25:40,040 --> 00:25:41,580
Those circuit breakers do that
sometimes.
426
00:25:44,560 --> 00:25:45,720
Oh, no, not again.
427
00:25:46,800 --> 00:25:48,340
There must be something wrong with that
breaker.
428
00:25:49,020 --> 00:25:50,380
Maybe you should get them handled.
429
00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:53,040
That's a good idea. I'll go and see if I
can dig some out.
430
00:26:14,510 --> 00:26:16,470
I wonder if Cupid had to work under
these conditions.
431
00:26:19,890 --> 00:26:21,990
I hope you don't mind dining by
candlelight.
432
00:26:22,230 --> 00:26:23,230
No, not at all.
433
00:26:25,570 --> 00:26:26,810
Would you like to dance?
434
00:26:28,990 --> 00:26:29,990
I beg your pardon?
435
00:26:30,830 --> 00:26:33,530
Well, I always love to dance between
courses.
436
00:26:34,190 --> 00:26:36,470
Oh, would you like to hear another joke?
No, let's dance.
437
00:26:53,580 --> 00:26:54,580
a very good dancer.
438
00:26:56,900 --> 00:26:59,720
Thanks. I could have made it really big,
but Fred Astaire stole all my routines.
439
00:27:01,180 --> 00:27:03,020
You're really very light on my feet.
440
00:27:05,120 --> 00:27:06,980
My wife used to make that same bum joke.
441
00:27:11,580 --> 00:27:12,580
Aha!
442
00:27:14,520 --> 00:27:15,740
And I'm not surprised.
443
00:27:18,100 --> 00:27:19,640
Adelaide, what are you doing here?
444
00:27:20,100 --> 00:27:21,560
I didn't come to cut in.
445
00:27:32,680 --> 00:27:33,519
I don't understand.
446
00:27:33,520 --> 00:27:35,660
Pick up your things. What are you
talking about?
447
00:27:36,020 --> 00:27:38,320
If you wanted the dancer, why didn't you
say so?
448
00:27:38,600 --> 00:27:39,740
Can she do this?
449
00:27:45,700 --> 00:27:46,820
Adelaide, what's wrong?
450
00:27:47,220 --> 00:27:51,060
What in the world is bothering you?
What's bothering me is this shoe and
451
00:27:51,060 --> 00:27:52,300
backstabbing vamp.
452
00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:56,800
Don't you dare call me a backstabbing
vamp, shorty.
453
00:27:57,140 --> 00:28:00,340
What kind of a man would get a little
kid to do his firing?
454
00:28:01,380 --> 00:28:02,380
Firing?
455
00:28:07,240 --> 00:28:08,300
Where is Arnold?
456
00:28:08,640 --> 00:28:12,100
Oh, I don't know. He went out for hot
dogs and never came back. We lost him at
457
00:28:12,100 --> 00:28:14,660
the skating rink. You locked him? Well,
have you looked everywhere?
458
00:28:15,080 --> 00:28:16,520
Yeah, Dad. He just disappeared.
459
00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:19,780
I knew this place would fall apart
without me.
460
00:28:21,080 --> 00:28:22,160
Hi, everybody.
461
00:28:22,540 --> 00:28:24,760
Well, I think I'm going to turn in
early. Good night.
462
00:28:26,520 --> 00:28:28,740
Just one minute, Arnold.
463
00:28:29,800 --> 00:28:31,920
I have a few questions for you.
464
00:28:32,520 --> 00:28:33,740
I'll plead the First Amendment.
465
00:28:36,620 --> 00:28:37,499
the fifth.
466
00:28:37,500 --> 00:28:39,140
Whichever one will save my behind.
467
00:28:42,160 --> 00:28:45,640
You just start talking. I'll be the one
that decides what you save.
468
00:28:46,180 --> 00:28:51,580
Well, Dad, I arranged the whole thing
because I thought if you and Sandra fell
469
00:28:51,580 --> 00:28:54,560
in love and got married, me, Willis, and
Kimberly would have a mom again.
470
00:28:56,340 --> 00:29:00,900
Oh, Arnold, you know, I'm really very
fond of you, but I can't be your mama.
471
00:29:00,900 --> 00:29:02,940
engaged to somebody else. We're going to
be married.
472
00:29:03,300 --> 00:29:04,300
We are.
473
00:29:04,880 --> 00:29:06,700
And I think it's all over between us.
474
00:29:07,920 --> 00:29:11,840
Arnold, I know that you're disappointed,
but maybe someday I'll get married
475
00:29:11,840 --> 00:29:12,980
again. Yeah?
476
00:29:13,340 --> 00:29:14,340
Sure, Arnold.
477
00:29:14,540 --> 00:29:16,640
Well, I just hope you get a wife before
I do.
478
00:29:33,580 --> 00:29:38,940
They knock, they write a song. A man is
born. He's a man of me.
479
00:29:39,220 --> 00:29:41,000
Then along come two.
480
00:29:41,220 --> 00:29:43,080
They got nothing but the cheese.
481
00:29:43,280 --> 00:29:44,280
And they got...
482
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:25,240
What's up with you?
483
00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:26,760
What's up with me?
484
00:30:27,140 --> 00:30:31,920
Hello, I just worked three late shifts
three nights in a row because you wanted
485
00:30:31,920 --> 00:30:32,879
time off.
486
00:30:32,880 --> 00:30:35,800
Well, you shouldn't be operating heavy
machinery, man. Go get some rest.
487
00:30:36,060 --> 00:30:40,060
Don't you worry about it. I'm going to
curl up on that couch and watch the
488
00:30:40,360 --> 00:30:43,360
Not me. I got another hot date with the
twins.
489
00:30:44,460 --> 00:30:45,460
Mindy and Cindy?
490
00:30:45,660 --> 00:30:46,660
Oh, yeah.
491
00:30:47,020 --> 00:30:50,140
Damn, sounds like things are getting
serious between you three.
492
00:30:50,700 --> 00:30:53,820
You know, life is good. Man's got a...
493
00:30:54,080 --> 00:30:56,900
Settle down with a good woman and a
sister.
494
00:30:59,780 --> 00:31:02,200
Tell me, Ed, what's it like with twins?
495
00:31:02,620 --> 00:31:04,360
No, no, no, no, don't tell me. Don't
tell me.
496
00:31:04,680 --> 00:31:06,080
Okay, tell me. No, no, wait.
497
00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:07,920
Don't tell me.
498
00:31:09,020 --> 00:31:10,580
All right, tell me.
499
00:31:11,840 --> 00:31:13,960
It's love in stereo.
500
00:31:15,680 --> 00:31:16,680
I'm jealous.
501
00:31:17,660 --> 00:31:19,460
Oh, no, no, no, it gets better, man.
502
00:31:19,720 --> 00:31:22,600
I go by they place, it's tag team
pampering.
503
00:31:23,100 --> 00:31:26,780
You know, they pour me a glass of
champagne. They take turns feeding me
504
00:31:26,780 --> 00:31:27,780
strawberries.
505
00:31:28,120 --> 00:31:31,840
And then I serve them Eddie under glass
for dinner.
506
00:31:36,660 --> 00:31:38,780
You know, I'm dating the twins.
507
00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:42,380
I need this protein shake more than you
do.
508
00:32:15,820 --> 00:32:16,980
It's gonna collect the funny bones.
509
00:32:17,600 --> 00:32:20,960
It just gonna leave you alone while you
sit inside your home.
510
00:32:52,590 --> 00:32:55,170
I know I work out, but four times is
enough.
511
00:32:57,330 --> 00:32:58,390
What happened?
512
00:32:59,710 --> 00:33:01,730
I don't know. You was here. You tell me.
513
00:33:02,970 --> 00:33:04,270
Hey, where's our furniture?
514
00:33:05,090 --> 00:33:06,590
You were here. You tell me.
515
00:33:07,450 --> 00:33:09,650
I know. I wasn't sleeping that hard.
516
00:33:09,990 --> 00:33:14,010
You know, they only pick you up and set
you on the floor.
517
00:33:15,090 --> 00:33:16,950
That explains the floating dream.
518
00:33:18,130 --> 00:33:20,030
How could you let them rip us off?
519
00:33:20,650 --> 00:33:24,150
I was asleep, man. It could happen to
anyone. Anyone in a coma.
520
00:33:26,370 --> 00:33:29,630
Usually when a burglar picks you up, you
wake up.
521
00:33:30,130 --> 00:33:32,190
They even stole my protein drink.
522
00:33:32,470 --> 00:33:33,470
That's it, man.
523
00:33:49,420 --> 00:33:50,440
Somebody just shot one of your friends.
524
00:33:52,600 --> 00:33:53,600
Man,
525
00:33:55,300 --> 00:33:56,300
they cleaned you out, too.
526
00:33:56,520 --> 00:33:57,800
Oh, not Sammy Davis Jr.'s eye.
40208
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