Original subtitles

This is an Eyewitness News special report.

Eighteen missing students off the Ensenada coast.

I'm coming to you live from Los Calientes del Sol Hotel here in

is serving as a sort of base camp for those involved in the developing search.

Of course, it's still spring break, and as you can tell from the noisy and

demonstrative crowd behind me, Ensenada is normally a happy place for many young

San Diegans.

From what we're starting to understand, a group of seniors from suburban

Riverdale High came down here two days ago. They were booked on a whale

-watching tour by this man, Steve Papillion, part -time teaching assistant

special teams coach at Riverdale.

The list of missing students includes 50 -year senior and Riverdale quarterback

Roger Hopkins, known around Riverdale as The Rod.

When the boat did not initially return as planned, little was thought of it

because this particular boat, the Diablo Blanco, is often used for booze cruises

at events in Otter Harbor.

One thing is for certain, though, authorities say, these Riverdale teens

be any other choice.

He opens up.

Flynn had not been having a good day.

But all in all, he was lucky.

Because he did receive mouth -to -mouth from the girl of his innermost dreams,

Peggy Turner.

Okay, people, show's over.

You can stop being a pain in the ass and go back to being a gentleman.

Thankfully for Flynn, Peggy had gotten on the unpopular kid's life raft.

The unpopulars were here, on an island 60 miles off the Baja coast.

In addition to the items we've already extracted from the boat, the emergency

kit contains first aid kit,

solar -powered flashlights to go along with our solar -powered lanterns, flare

gun, and only two flares. Great, two shots.

The third generation.

Drugs. Have you seen anybody else?

Football guy, cheerleader, anybody?

I find lots and lots of drugs.

Morning, Blurry C.

No, thank you.

With evening fast approaching and rescue not immediately forthcoming, the

students decided more elaborate accommodations were in order.

Oh, my God, I had a bar.

I hate to poop on your party, but we already investigated that.

There's no reception anywhere on this island.

Now our only hope is the flare gun. Don't worry, we're going to be rescued

second. There are tons of islands in this area.

I mean, it could take weeks before... Oh, my God, you guys, I bet you everyone

else has already been rescued. Everyone else... Could already be dead.

Hey!

Hey,

Turner, would you like some water?

traumatic stress syndrome.

You should talk to her.

Why me? She saved your life.

And you two were in AP English together.

Here's a couple excellent jumping off points.

I won't come back until I know what happened to all my friends.

Dang your friend.

I think you got onto our raft on purpose.

Why would I do that?

We've got so many friends here. But I don't like my friends. Ever since you

switched from Prozac to Effexor, you have been totally certifiable. They are

threatening to kick her off the cheerleading squad. They made someone

captain. She's sullen. She's gaining weight.

You didn't hear any of that, did you?

You can't talk, right?

Afexers really work for me.

One word, and the next poem you write will be a gelding.

What's a gelding? It's a horse with no ball.

I don't hate my friends.

I was just going through a rough time.

Well, what did the Raj think?

He was really supportive.

He got me a gift certificate to Curves.

Brought me a special scale.

Hello.

My boyfriend is damaged.

Pardon me for saying this, but your boyfriend's kind of a dick.

Right now I'm a little more worried about him being dead than him being a

Can I help you take a look?

If you brought me out here to try anything, forget it.

There's a good chance I'm in mourning.

You seem awfully unsatisfied for a grieving 17 -year -old widow.

Look, I'm just riding this whole social situation out until graduation.

Then I'm never talking to any of these people again.

I had the same thing happen to me.

And what happened to me?

You had that moment where you realized you're beyond all this.

When was it for you?

Sixth grade.

Maybe somebody should keep watch.

Fine.

Take the first shot.

It's nice having a friend at a time like that.

Oh, but now we're friends.

Well, you didn't have a hell of a lot of competition.

As a future creative writing major, Flynn could appreciate the irony.

It had taken a disaster at sea to finally bring him and Peggy together.

Eventually, night gave way to morning.

The students were about to begin their second official day as castaways.

But as the group slept away on the beach, They were unaware that a powerful

force was about to invade their camp.

And having been caught unconsciously spooning Peggy, Flynn was in line for a

particularly rude awakening.

The

jocks

and cheerleaders had arrived late last night on the other side of the island,

thinking they had landed back on the mainland.

They had spent several hours looking for a Taco Bell before realizing they were

shipwrecked. Their landing at the Unpopular's camp was one part saving

Ryan, one part girls gone wild.

I was

just

gonna say, find a bottle opener.

What is the hell?

Hey! That's T -Ray.

T -Ray?

T -Ray, the Mexican T -Rex, had enjoyed a brief birth of fame in the mid -1980s

with his hit, Del Coche Que Tengo.

T -Ray!

Oh my gosh, look who made it! Girl!

Ooh, it's Little Miss 110 pounds.

Glad to see you didn't sink your life raft, poor T.

I couldn't understand you, Jess. Can you take a finger out of the bag? your

throat and reinsert it in your ass?

Two -time honorable mention all -district quarterback, ski club

and current world record holder at the Body Shot Olympics at Cabo Lago.

Well, well, if it ain't Riverdale's own John Grisham.

In the Rogers world, all writers were named John Grisham.

There are tons of places to do it out here.

Sweet.

Oh, Chet, no, no, no, Chet, Chet, Chet. Oh, Becky.

Your skin shows off its extra phosphorescent composition in this

Um, do I know you?

It's me.

Chet!

Hey, Becky.

I just needed to get this off my chest once and for all.

I've had a crush on you since third grade.

And now that we're seniors, I figure this is my last chance to tell you how I

really feel.

I cherish you, Becky.

And I know that we come from opposite sides of the spectrum, but I really

if you can forget who your friends are and who my friend is...

then we can approach this idea as consenting adults, not cliquish teens.

If you're willing to look deep inside of yourself and take the time to get to

know me, I really think that you'll find we have a lot more in common than you'd

expect.

So, what do you say?

Your privilege just to be sharing airspace with us, Red Dog.

We're not fucking communists, man. We don't share.

It's the Rajas, goddamn it!

You guys didn't even bother to help save the crew. You didn't even save Coach

Papillion yet. Oh, you managed to save all of the ships, beer and liquor.

They're already gone, mister.

Besides, dude's got to have his priorities.

By the way, where's Phil?

Didn't he jump onto your lifeboat?

Ah,

Phil.

Boys.

Next season's for Phil!

Phil!

There is no next season.

What? You're all seniors.

Several people are missing.

Listen, we bought that boat. Don't worry about it. My dad will totally pay for

it. I think you're missing the bigger picture. What if the picture included me

planting my foot into your well -worn thespian ass?

challenge retards on this side.

Pursuit of business.

Party nominations.

Ooh, I nominate the Raj for class president.

You?

Nah.

Is there anybody else want to take me on?

I nominate Flynn.

Are you nuts?

You can do it. You have a philosopher king sense of authority about you. You

a speech, Grisham? No. Well, you better think of something quick, because Virgin

Queen here just called you out.

Okay. Man up.

I just want to start this off by saying that I have absolutely no interest in

the petition.

I really, really, really do not want you guys to vote for me.

Go, Flynn.

Go, Flynn.

That's it?

That was beautiful.

All right, all right, all for the homo.

Okay, nominations are closed.

Now let's hear it for the Rods, people!

For the rest of their time on Earth, the popular kids would never again show

such a yen for democracy.

What are you talking about?

I'm crossing that line again. What are you talking about?

What do you

think?

I thought you said it was going to be more like the Matrix.

You're very vulnerable right now.

I'm here for you. Get in here. Oh, okay.

Back it up.

Stay up top for your bro.

I just want to, you know.

I

think

that my peeps deserve a victory party for all their hard work.

Death experience.

Right, people.

Suffered through a difficult election campaign.

I think I'm going to have a few drinks.

Chill out.

Fuck some chicks.

Vaginal intercourse!

And do all that other stuff that we talked about at our earliest

Take what you need!

Having watched these two groups clash since kindergarten, Flynn was sure of

thing. This was a rumble the unpopular kids were bound to lose.

I saw your last play. That Deus Ex Machina was totally milked in the last

What the fuck?

Becky, I'm growing more and more concerned with your behavior since we

the island. We need to get off this island. Maybe not all of us want to

our lives in high school. Don't you worry. You will be getting off on this

island. They put condoms in there for us, honey.

No, no.

The condoms are here for water storage use only. They're going to be storing

something. Don't worry about it, buddy.

I'm going to go have a talk with your boy.

Please don't be a prick. Grisham!

Let's have a little heart -to -heart.

It's smart not to tag with the Raj.

That's really smart to keep your distance from the Raj's squeeze.

She's emotionally troubled enough as it is without him, some emo cardigan

sweater -wearing type, filling her head with some, oh, the places you'll go type

of shit.

It's hard to argue with such illogical logic.

Good talk.

Your reaction to the election results?

Can you just leave me alone?

Are you mad because the Rod stopped the progress you were making with Peggy?

Fuck off.

Heaven knows that she found all the ways.

I've been left with a lonely anime.

She searched for me.

Searched for me.

And for that I'll thank her endlessly.

Guess I'll have to try to make amends.

Between me and all her rich quick friends.

She searched for me.

Searched for me.

And for that I'll thank you endlessly.

Oh, please leave me alone.

We need your help.

More specifically, Jed needs your help.

What are you guys doing? This little punk was trying to steal our shit that

stole from us. I was just trying to get stuff for a signal fire.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

Nobody does anything without my okay.

Would you guys think that just because we're out here, the rules of high school

don't apply?

I got a free tip for you.

What did you just call me? Baby.

It's okay.

First, he puts the moves on my woman, and then he disrespects me in front of

peeps?

First of all, your check just got cashed.

This is what teamwork is, all right?

To you, he may be a biology teacher, but to us, he's also a linebacker coach.

And in the real world, on a team, you do not leave a man behind.

Oh, fuck.

He hit his head pretty damn hard from the looks of it.

My hair hurt.

I'm so tired.

Put him out of this misery. That's all he needs.

He's one of us. We should bring him into the forest.

Get him out of the elements.

Get him out of the elements.

He's a Riverdale wildcat. He is a fighter. He stays with us.

Hey,

we still got next season, baby.

We still got next season.

We're so off course.

We're missing.

We're totally lost.

Totally.

We're off course. It's me and my boys.

There's a side story about my second wife, but I'm not going to get into it

right now.

We're off course.

Clearly.

Clearly.

Lost the sea.

I'm a wild cat.

Meow.

Cat.

Did Coach P just say what I think he just said?

Of course.

Hard to find.

Ex -wife. I'm a cat.

Lost.

Yep, we're screwed.

Hey, hey, hey, no long faces.

This means that we get to party a little bit longer. No, this is serious.

It means you should be making preparations for a longer stay.

You need to chill the hell out.

Everybody, the Raj is still large and in charge.

Yeah, yeah, shit sucks, but I had a test I wanted to miss next week anyway.

Right again.

And you, all you little people, you're all invited to tonight's fiesta.

Grisham, I won't even be the shit out of you.

Did you hear a word Coach P just said?

Did you hear a word? The coach peed his stud.

Hey, Grisham, you know a little brain vacay might loosen your ass up?

Hey, he's your buddy.

Let's knock some sense into him.

Every minute you stay with him, my opinion of you drops another half

grid.

Hey, Grisham, I'll tell you what's up, coach.

You're bored.

We should get back on those wraps.

And risk God knows how long on open water. Don't be so damn dumb.

I'm sorry, Mr. I Got Rejected by Juilliard, but I'd prefer open water to

frickin' rocks. Stop it!

The best minds in our school, and we can't outwit the future cast of survivor

genetic mistakes. We are ten times smarter than them, but they're a team.

We're not.

He's right.

They function as a symbiotic organism.

How do you take control of something like that?

You take out the head.

You take out the head and the rest will follow.

Wait, wait, wait.

You mean take out the Raj?

Yeah,

Flynn. What are you saying? What I'm saying is we probe the Raj for a

Then you attack that.

I mean, everything the Raj stands for teeters on his ability to make his

feel safe.

What exactly are we talking about?

Fear.

Fear? We scare them.

We stay out of their way.

And then we let them party.

We let them party until they have run out of everything.

And then their guards will be down.

Flynn's plan consisted of three stages.

One, intercept the Rajah's normal drug supply and replace it with a more potent

substitute.

Two, recruit Peggy to distract the Rajah the moment the drugs hit their peak,

leaving the rest of the populars vulnerable to attack.

And three, lead his group in a series of maneuvers designed to frighten the

unprotected populace, who would then turn on the Raj.

Yeah, I've been selling them some stuff.

What are they asking for?

Light hallucinogens, mostly.

Mushrooms, peyote, kava root, cheap hemp, fugu fish, poison tree frogs, DMT.

It varies.

Do you have anything, you know, that would send you into a space where

seemed more like you?

Oh, yeah.

This, right here.

Anti -delusion bark.

The Aztecs used to take this to make themselves think they were Incas.

How do you take it?

With food. Otherwise, you're going to hurt something here.

Why?

Thank you.

What's this all about, Ivan?

From Flynn.

Will you do it?

Sure. You know, he's really starting to evidence some leadership qualities.

And Peggy, say hi to Becky from me.

That is beautiful.

Peggy, this is for you.

I just hope this shit's got some kick to it. Per Flynn's instructions, the Raj

was only receiving a placebo.

That last batch couldn't trip up. Why?

This should definitely do the trick.

Just close your eyes and follow.

As Flynn and his team watched and waited, the drugs finally began to kick

bending the popular kids' minds and setting up what was sure to be a

evening.

You guys, I'm going to miss you a lot, you know?

What are you thinking about doing, Paul, bud?

I think my brother's going to make me a manager at his cell phone accessories

store.

No, I didn't apply to any.

Yes. It sounds like all of our futures are going to be totally off.

Yes.

Yes.

It really doesn't sound that awesome.

Mediocre at this.

What?

I wish I was still a virgin.

Do you ever get the feeling that you peaked at 18?

Maybe. I was thinking we could go off the beach for a few days.

Everybody's pretty messed up. I don't think that's such a good idea. But I've

been wanting to do something that I've wanted to do for a really long time.

Okay,

here they come.

The boobot running out of batteries.

T -Ray's golden obi was transformed into an instrument of terror.

30 minutes left.

I gotta say, Peggy, it is about damn time.

Okay, okay, Roger.

What is the sex of surprise?

I've been waiting to do this, but I've decided to push up my schedule.

I don't think we should go out anymore.

I'm sorry.

What did you just say?

I'm done with this.

And more specifically, you.

But I thought that being here would give us a chance at a fresh kickstart.

You thought being shipwrecked on a desolate, uncharted island would be a

kickstart? Yeah, I thought we could turn back the clock.

We could capture some of the magic.

Look, this hasn't worked for a while.

How long?

Approximately 14 months.

Okay, I just want you to realize that when the Raj says it's over, it's

over.

But I'm breaking up with you. Peg, I've been reexamining our relationship, and I

think that it's better if we just go our separate ways.

No, I really just dumped you.

It's just... I know.

I know you lived through this. It's fucking believable.

Stay strong.

Guys. Guess what?

I made some masks.

Trey had unexpectedly introduced Mardi Gras masks, convincing Flynn to alter

plan.

Okay, Derek. Go to the beach.

He would now take the bold stroke of sending in Derek, disguised as the Rod.

Hey, Pete. Why the long faces?

Dude, you're different.

Sometimes revisiting certain moments in a relationship can help us prevent

making the same mistakes in the future.

We just broke up like 45 seconds ago. Great then, while it's still fresh in

minds. This could be totally cathartic. Okay, just stop it right now.

Don't come crawling back to me. I don't want you to do that. You hold your head

up high.

Show some self -respect for God's sake. Why are you doing this?

Just stop. It's really embarrassing now what you're doing.

That's not doing it for me.

Mami.

In the eyes of the bewildered popular kids, no amount of hallucinations could

excuse the Raj from being so blatantly experimental.

They are now all... Permanently scarred for life.

Hey, Pete.

One of long faces.

We all think you should take a little break from... But I don't understand.

I just broke up with Peggy.

I need you guys.

Yeah, that's obvious.

Yeah, we, uh... We all respect what you're trying to do, but it's a little

much too soon.

Not cool.

That's two.

Trey?

I've got to sort out these people.

One bad banana.

What then?

Take a seat.

I have something very important to tell you.

I'm all ears.

I'm single.

I did manage to steal one thing from the emergency kit.

I thought those were for water storage.

This is an Eyewitness News special report.

For many of the parents holding vigil here in Ensenada, the past week or so

been a harrowing, frightful experience.

But for at least one family, there's been a ray of light, some hope for the

future. With me now is Roger Hopkins, Sr., father of missing high school

football star Roger Hopkins, Jr., known by many as the Raj.

And who's this?

This is our son, Moira.

And how long has he been your son?

Since Tuesday. We met him by the bar selling chiclets, and we just, like,

hit it off.

We?

My wife, Misty, and I.

His mother's a Dorian's right now, picking up some odds and ends. It's,

crazy time around our house right now.

So you've adopted him as your own? We have.

We're naming him Roger.

But you have a son named Roger.

That's right.

We certainly do, Maureen.

This was an Eyewitness News special report.

With the Raj disposed of for the time being, a fresh feeling of cooperation

swept over the castaways.

And for many of the students, the merging of the groups had created new

intriguing social possibilities.

So Petey, Big Mo, and Robert move down the list, and the unpopular guys move

Yeah, it's the realities of the marketplace.

Look at those two.

Need to get me an unpopular boy.

So much uncharted territory.

And then sophomore year, I sent you 12 red carnations with an invite to

homecoming.

I watched your car like... Six times last month.

Oh, so this is starting to sound familiar.

It's Chet, right?

Yeah.

Yes, I am Chet. I knew it.

You know, you seem like a nice guy.

My mom says I need a nice guy for once.

Some people say I'm an overly needy skank, but there's nothing wrong with

having a boyfriend.

So where is this bar?

It's on the corner of 5th and Elmarian. I think you'd really like it. It sounds

awesome. What's it called?

Spanish Manolones.

That's a G.

Does Nickelback play G? Probably.

So I'm writing a little one act.

I think you'd be great as the Dean of Admissions for Juilliard's Theatre

Program.

You know, I always wanted to be an actor.

Well... Read it over and roll it around in your head.

What is your reaction to the peace accord between the two groups?

Oh, it's, uh, it's very awesome.

It reminds me of the end of Time of Trouble, where the whole nation, the

school, is amazing.

Okay.

Now that you populars have all been fed and hopefully gotten over what happened

last night...

The beach is back that way.

No, we don't want to go.

We want to stay here.

Okay. But if you're staying, you're going to have to work.

Do what I say, agreed?

Yeah, we'll do.

Good.

Well, then it's now time to get to the business at hand.

Get in the hell out of here.

I'm going to be splitting you guys up into groups.

Group A will work on building and maintaining a signal fire.

Group B will work on overhead signals.

Group C will work on shelters, making the camp more livable.

Ivan and Woody will head up Plan X.

Plan X is our emergency plan.

A plan that could, when deemed necessary, enable us to escape the

hours.

I am now handing the flare gun to Chet. Chet, come here.

All right.

Chet, and only Chet will be in charge of it. And under no circumstances is it to

be used to celebrate anything.

other than the appearance of an airplane.

I, uh... That's it. Yeah.

Let's hear it for the new Raj.

Yeah!

That's very nice, but I'm not the new Raj.

No.

He's the big guy.

Big guy.

The two groups began to improve their situation.

They became a cohesive unit.

Overhead rescue signals were placed and eventually were properly spelled.

Plan X, the emergency evacuation strategy, was beginning to take shape.

Some very necessary personal amenities were tended to.

Chet and his new very intimate assistant oversaw the construction of the signal

fire.

Derek and Big Mo's one act was well received.

All in all, it was a Rocky Balboa -like improvement.

Meanwhile, the Raj had dragged Coach P to an undisclosed location to begin

life in exile.

Nice move, Coach.

You gotta give me a chance to win just once.

They gotta get you something to wake your ass up.

Fucking killing me.

Hey, Glenn.

Hey.

It's not a thing we should just sit down and have a talk. Just rap, you know,

man to man.

Rap? I just thought I'd speak at you, you know? Like, the two of us are pretty

much the only...

men on the island that are having sex right yeah i

guess that's true i don't know i just thought maybe we'd have a little

to share with each other about you know what do you mean i mean i don't want to

share my i'm very personal about my sex life i'm i am too you know yeah which is

great because i'm definitely definitely having sex yeah yeah a lot of it cool

that's good with a girl but yeah becky she's she's great she's really sweet

she's a good girl yeah she she really seems like you're right she likes you

becky is sweet until sometimes i just feel like

she's a rabid wolverine in the height of her ovulation and i'm but a small

field mouth and she's she's ready to ravage my frail body in

gentle, yet controlling caresses.

You know, the thing about having sex is not to talk about it, to go around

talking about it. Keep it to yourself.

Make it a personal thing between you and the woman that you love. Yeah, I mean,

I don't need to talk about all the sex that I'm having because it's just, I

mean, the sex speaks for itself.

I mean, obviously it doesn't speak for itself. I mean, she's vocal.

She's extremely vocal, actually.

I'm surprised that you and some of the other, you know, islanders haven't heard

her yelps and cries.

Sometimes I cry, too.

You know, I don't know if her parents have cable or if she's

been looking it up on the Internet, but there's some things you said.

Becky, no. I need to tell.

There are times.

Well, we're, you know, going at the sex really hardcore and...

I don't feel entirely safe.

Yeah, good talk. This was a good talk.

Thanks. Yeah.

This was a helpful talk.

Thanks, Flynn.

Hey. Yeah.

We're having sex.

Sure are.

Don't be nervous.

Woody? Oh, my God. I want you to know that I'm available to you.

And if you won't sleep with me this time... Oh, my God.

If you're not going to sleep with me this time, Woody, I want you to come and

find me anytime you want, and I'll make some kind of arrangement.

I need to go.

Do you understand what I just said?

Yes. Just let me out. Because I am very attracted to you.

I wasn't before, but I am sensitive to the fact that things can change.

And I'm ready to do my part now, so... If you won't sleep with me this time,

Derek, I want you to know that you can come and find me. I'm gay.

You've got to be shitting me.

Devin, I want you to know that this normally isn't my thing.

I mean, I will totally make out with a girl for a beer, for a ride home. You're

not my type.

Too skinny. I just want you both to know that I have been in tons of freeways.

And I'm so attentive to everyone's needs. Everyone involved is very

We were kind of waiting for college to experiment.

Chet, I just want you to know that Becky and I share everything.

If you know what I mean.

No, I'm just a little bit sexually drained.

I just want you to know that I am totally, totally available to you.

Sounds good.

Let's go.

So while the groups were busy seducing each other, Flynn found himself seduced

by another powerful force, popularity.

Hey, big guy.

Why don't you come sit at our table?

Really? Yeah.

Where are you going?

Thought we could sit with them for a change.

I just spent six months and thousands of dollars in antidepressants to not sit

with them.

But we're all on the same team now.

Come on.

And I thought we were the popular kids for once.

Sellouts. Me and some of the gang were thinking, and we've been busting our

asses hella hard with this get -rescue shit. Yeah, like 24 -7. When we first

said yes to this crap, we thought we'd be working one, maybe two days tops.

Now it's been like a week.

Which in our world is like two weeks.

Yeah, and we were wondering, with your permission, if this Friday night you

might be able to kick it with a little...

R &R of the Kool -Aid football variety?

I mean, obviously you guys can play football.

I just don't know about the rest. We'd split up.

Incorporate the geeks. Less athletically inclined.

Yeah. You could play QB.

I could?

Yeah.

Keep a two -hand touch. Get the chicks involved.

That's why we're making a night game.

What do you say, big guy?

We have been working pretty hard. Yeah!

I told y 'all he was the decider.

Can I talk to you?

That's a good idea. Everybody needs to blow off some steam.

Steam from what?

Spelling help backwards?

Mixing the poison berries in with the good ones? Oh, he likes it angry.

Do you know what the real problem here is?

That popularity corrupts. I am not getting corrupted.

Sure you are.

I know because it happened to me.

You're still too new to being liked to really understand.

Yeah, get something, guys. See?

I like sex.

Everything to them is a stop on the expressway to a high, a fight, or a

That's cool for them.

Not you.

Come on. An extra day or two is not going to kill anybody.

Probably not.

He's out there.

Yes, but they all think he's persona non grata.

Don't underestimate the Raj.

He counts on it. With Coach P still showing no signs of waking up, the Raj

decided some stronger medicine was in order.

And over this way.

Those them? Yes.

Coca plants. Some heavy shit, friend.

Maybe for you.

Not for me.

Well, I don't know. Coke's a passport to a bummer of a time.

You keep on tripping, Skywalker.

Raj needs to take a shot.

Coca leaf is the raw material in cocaine.

a powerful stimulant and illegal recreational drug.

When chewed in small quantities, coca produces a heightened state of numbness

and exhilaration. But when chewed in large quantities, it can produce

tendencies.

Got a favorite band?

I like Daughtry.

Daughtry and the Beaver Brown, right?

No, just Daughtry. They call them Daughtry.

You?

Jay Giles and Foghat.

Journey's my shit. Just a small town girl.

Living in a lonely world. Shut up, let me sing it. While the drive to complete

the signal fire before the end of the week has proven very successful.

Under the supervision of Flynn and Chet, the wooden structure has been built on

a high cliff overlooking the northwest beach.

According to sources, it can be ignited with a simple match and should be

visible at up to 3 .6 miles.

Now here's Jess with the weather. So the heat wave's going to continue with

estimated highs reaching, like, upper 80s, which is awesome beach weather.

And if you guys are starting to run out of sunscreen, stay out of the sun.

So I guess that means the early bird stays made in the shade, huh, Jess?

I don't get it.

Because, like, birds don't tan. Let's go to Robert with sports.

Football game is Friday.

It is evenly distributed.

Food after, back to you. Thank you, Roberts.

That's your bugler to go for now. Have a good night.

And that's how you throw a spiral. Bring him back to it.

Oh!

Sun's going down. Let's get this game started. The Raj, he asked for coke

opponents for him and Coach Papillion.

Coach Papillion?

Thought it might wake him up.

Shit.

I really wish you hadn't have done that. You don't want to see the Raj coked out

of his gourd.

Have you ever been fucked over the way that I've been fucked over by my peeps?

I've been fucked over ever since I popped out of my mom's ditch hole.

That's disgusting.

You got somewhere else to go?

Nope. Oh my god, it's time.

You and me, man.

You can never leave me here.

I'll never leave you.

I feel it, because we're one.

You and me.

You remind me so much of you.

Of me, I mean.

You gotta stay here.

You can't leave.

I've seen your future, and it's shit.

H .P.

H .P.

Wake up. Wake up. You need to tell me about my future.

H .P., wake up. You need to tell me about my future.

My future.

Wake up!

Wake up! You need to tell me about my future!

Wake up!

I need more. So, so soon?

Yeah, because the rocks need to know more.

You need to know more about the future.

You need to cool out.

I do not!

You know, they were right. You are a psycho.

I'm glad I helped them.

Helped?

With what?

Nothing.

Shane, you're not going to be able to walk out of here unless you start giving

me the 411.

All right, guys and girls, before we pick teams, I just want to make an

announcement that Derek will be sitting out this game due to his upcoming play.

So I'm going to start.

Hey, Ivan.

What's up? You know, you pissed all the girls.

I thought this was off the game.

No.

You guys ready?

Yeah. Big guy.

We're in big trouble here.

What are you talking about? It's practically boys versus girls.

You don't understand.

These girls have been cheerleading football since they were six years old.

They've forgotten more football than we will ever know.

Okay, ladies, we're going to be using a run and shoot offense.

Now, they see us as a one running back, two slot, two receiver formation.

Typically, they use three wide receivers. Sometimes they use five.

to be using three because of our limited numbers. Don't fret, gentlemen.

I've devised a few plays harnessing the power of physics.

Okay, but remember, if five or six are in the box, for God's sake, run the

football. Use motion and formation to spread out the defense.

Okay, now keep your eyes up, watch your back, and let's win this shit.

Ready?

Bitches on three.

Bitches! Visual aids, big mouth.

Yes. Actually,

this one really shouldn't be in here. It was a quick study guide Becky gave me

after the first time we had intercourse.

I have questions.

Any of you have answers?

Yeah.

The anal beads.

Yeah, that's for you. That's yours. Highly underrated. Highly.

The Raj had finally gone native.

Sorry, guys.

Made me.

Oh, my God.

We need to get out of here. I can handle this. No, I don't think you can.

Grisham?

With the Raj's chick?

I haven't been this sickened since I saw that uncircumcised kid at football

camp.

The Raj doesn't understand.

We're with the big guy now. You kissed Peter. And you grabbed my ass.

And you didn't kiss me. Do you really think that I would do any of that shit?

It was this fucker's fault.

He got Morris in here to give us something that fucked us up royally. So

that you all thought that this was

Raj.

No way.

I'll show you anywhere.

Do the voice.

I don't know what you're talking about.

Do the voice.

Do it!

It's true.

But it's for everyone's own good.

We're working together now. He played you all for suckers.

He made a mockery out of the Raj.

And now someone's gotta pay.

Use a little backup here.

Say it ain't so, big guy.

You made us all look like total dicks.

Just to make us do... work?

Don't you see?

Had you all continued to follow the Raj, we'd never have a chance to get home.

Who says we're going home?

Excuse me?

Peace. I have seen the future.

And it is right here, right now.

We go back.

We got to go our separate ways.

Go to college.

Work.

And then it's over.

We're over.

But if we stay, like permanent spring break.

I won't have to retake my SATs?

Some of us want to go home, Jan.

And some of us wish that we hadn't blown our second cousin at the family

reunion, but this is the real world.

But what about prom?

We'll just have it here.

Shit! We'll have it every week.

The rod speaks the truth!

Come on, guys.

For once in your life, listen to reason. Come on, guys.

For once in your life.

What's on the reason?

Beach! Come on, guys! Signal fire!

Beach! Get them! Do not let them light that signal fire!

It's gonna

take

too long. Dude, it's the plane! It's getting away!

Get that flare gun.

Okay. Please, round them up.

from now on you are either with the raj or against the raj so who's not

with me into the pit christian

you first grab just think you can write a book

about the day the raj threw you into the pit bestseller

The pit.

Now more than ever.

It's further than it looks.

You, who I don't understand, I don't know what you said.

I'll take this fucking place.

Trey.

It's like that?

This is too much, all right?

Shut the hell up.

We're staying forever, and it will be awesome. Get in the pit.

I'd rather be in that stinking hole with Chet than with any of you jerks.

That was noble.

Anyone else?

Please. Please throw me in the pit. No dice, sweet. You're with the Rods to

stay. I now proclaim you and all of your shit property of the Rods.

Again. The Rods. The Rods. The Rods. The Rods. The Rods. The Rods. The Rods.

The Rods. The Rods. The Rods. The Rods. The Rods. The Rods.

The Rods. The Rods. The Rods.

The Rods. Go.

Go. Go.

We'll get him in the morning.

Let's tend to the more pressing matter at hand.

Dog management.

The unpopulars, now permanently on their own, greeted the day trapped in what

the Raj had rechristened Duskatraz.

This was supposed to be a lady's latrine for six.

It was very necessary, believe me.

No one started using it yet, did they?

No. Oh, thank Christ.

Hey, the Raj summons you to tribal council.

Everybody out, dickheads.

El Presidente called this tribal council to order.

The Raj has put on his constitutional pants.

And has written down some new rules for you assholes.

That's right.

Rule number one.

Everyone must speak English.

Some of y 'all have been trying to confuse us with your fancy SAT code

From now on, the Raj catches you saying any of these words, your ass goes in the

pit.

Rule number two.

Bitches need to chill the fuck out.

What that means is the Raj doesn't want to hear any more of this... Shit.

Stop. We're here.

And if you don't... Throw our ass in the pit?

Your ass goes in the pit!

What's the next order of business?

Grisham.

Is that really necessary?

It's my order of the ride.

What's the charge?

That the perpetrator here has been a total lying douchebag.

Yeah. Fuck yeah, he has.

The Raj ponders.

The Raj will show mercy.

For now.

Christian?

I sentence you to no prom for one week.

Firm but fair, you know? And don't you worry about Peggy.

She's going to be just fine.

I got Petey looking after her.

How you doing?

How do you think I'm doing, Petey? I mean, what the hell, dude? I know, I

That's not my idea.

You know, do what I'm told.

I just kind of live in here.

Dude, we've been friends for such a long time. We have. I was there for your

sister's baby. You remember that? I remember.

So, wrapping this thing up, I got one little announcement.

Some of you have been trying these.

Coca -Lees.

Fucking awesome.

You don't snort them.

You chew them.

Oh.

Big mouth. Yeah, exactly.

All right, let's get ready for the prom!

Council's adjourned.

One step up from you, and I'm canceling your ass like a bad shack.

Ivan's up there.

Where is he? He's up in that tree, seemingly telling us that everything's a

But I also think he just wants to look down Becky's shirt.

Not a bad move.

I don't know if I appreciate that.

Mimi, I just wish you'd just relax a little bit.

You know, the ratchets have been so bad.

I'm sorry if I'm not enjoying your Manson family hoedown.

No, I can't wait till next week's prom.

Great.

She reminds me of prom night all over again.

I was so nervous.

She's beautiful.

So I woke up all alone.

Everybody having such a good time in the other room.

I think they were having an orgy.

I was never invited.

There's been, I think, eight orgies.

Tell me I'm going to be prom queen.

You're going to be prom queen.

I'm a hottest girl in here, right?

Yeah, my boo, babe.

You voted for me for prom queen, right?

Of course I did, babe.

You know you're my one and only prom queen, right?

Aww.

I'm going to remember the way you look tonight.

Los niños de adolescencia han

perdido la razón.

El llenado de cinismo,

el cambiamiento de la realidad.

Lobos verdos.

Meanwhile...

Ivan freed Flynn from the pit, and they both headed down to the beach, where

Chet was about to make a very unsurprising announcement.

And your prom king is... The Rod!

Nice.

Prom queen.

Numero uno.

And your prom queen is...

We have a tie.

This was not going to end well.

The

unexpected

conflict provided the perfect opportunity for Ivan to make his move.

I know we should stop this, but it is so totally turning me on. In the jock's

defense, it was a pretty good catfight.

You find Grisham.

You find him and you kill him. You find him and you fucking kill him.

All right, go.

As dawn broke on the horizon, the coke -fueled jocks went from going native to

going full -blown Lord of the Flies.

I know that any one of you brothers that's down for having a good time will

me in hunting this ass clam down, straight up capping this motherfucker.

Who's ready? We are.

Hey, bro, what does this remind you of?

Hey, Tom.

Am I too late for the prom?

Look, I know this is awful.

But what do you say we set a list like gentlemen?

However heroic Glenn's intentions, Peggy saw this was no time for chivalry.

Hit him!

Hit him again!

Hurry,

hurry! He's going to be back up in the next 20 seconds.

That soon?

When you're that dumb, certain messages just skip entirely through your nervous

system.

Got a plan?

Uh, run.

Solidite!

I've told them dreams throughout my heart

for crimes committed against the Raj.

Cut Grisha's throat! Fill his blood! Shut up!

Just take a breath.

Think about what you're doing.

Everything you've done, you can come back from.

You just destroyed a boat, probably killing the entire crew and Phil.

Kept us from signaling a plane.

Put Coach B into a minor coma.

Shit! That is a lot.

All right, boys.

Time to stop this mofo out.

Pull up.

Robert.

I want you long into the right.

Big mofo. I want you to thrust right up the center, baby.

Ready? You back him up on the left.

And the rod will deliver the bottom low.

Ready? Ready.

A one.

Foot two.

It's kind of fucked.

You see?

That's what we do with cesarean style.

All right?

Together.

Ready?

A two.

A three.

Fuck,

boy.

Play us on three.

Four. Five.

Three. It's just not working for me, bro.

Yeah, uh, big guy did act like a dick and all, you know, and, uh, we had a lot

of fun chasing him around screaming we're gonna cut his throat.

This is just fucking retarded. Shit's kind of heavy right now, bro.

Pussies.

Fine.

I'll show you how it's done.

It's like the alcohol game.

Yeah. Oh, my God, it's so... Don't you dare!

A passing fishing boat had picked up the unpopular, who immediately informed the

authorities as to the Rajah's location and state of mind.

Dad,

this is Becky.

It's my father and my stepmother Beverly.

How long have you known?

I've known for a while, honey.

Like since the second grade.

Damn.

Tell me!

Run!

I'll wait for you!

How come my parents never show up to anything?

Mom, this is Clint.

Hi.

Hi. Nice to meet you.

You look good. You lost weight.

We need a moment.

You in a lot of pain? Not that one. Do you want to bike it in?

We are in Mexico.

Sorry.

I figured you wrong.

Sorry, Dad.

It's okay.

Yeah? Yeah.

We can forgive you. Totally not cool.

Honey?

Is that you?

Will the Return of Society heal the wounds of months of isolation?

Um, actually, it's only been a couple weeks. Woody Hyatt, Riverdale Bugler.

been covering the story for weeks now, and perhaps we could exchange... That's

fine, kid, but it's time to let the professionals take over.

You have to frame your questions differently.

They're both troubled loners.

Back off, kid, before I have you removed.

Is it safe to say you could never really go home again?

I'm sure you could get a really lovely shot of somebody else.

But seriously, fuck off.

Troubled loners. You have to know how to handle them.

By the way, your hair looks like shit.

I sent a message out from where I was

for some direction back to

anyone I did not know what I

would find into the center

of the world from shore

to shore and wall to wall

orbiting the things

that keep us where we are

Oh, because, like, birds don't pant. Let's go to Robert with sports.

Forget it, girls.

I'm pulling rank on this one.

Go get him, Captain.

Bye.

Bye.