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Look, if I have to sell my car, I want
this ad to be perfect. What do you think
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of this?
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1997, four -door sedan, slightly damaged
rear end, full -sized spare tire, a lot
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of miles, but serviced regularly.
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Are you placing a personal ad?
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Bill, she's selling her car.
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Right?
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Yes, she's going to give me a percentage
if I help her sell it. I couldn't do it
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on my own. It's very hard for me to part
with Mr. Puffinshuck.
10
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Who? The name I gave my car, Mr.
Puffinshuck.
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You named your car.
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It's not that crazy. People name their
favorite things.
13
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I guess you're right. I've been known to
do that.
14
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Ain't that right, Thelma and Louise?
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Gross. They weren't gross when you were
four.
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I know that, Mom.
17
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Wait, four?
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With separation issues.
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00:00:59,450 --> 00:01:00,450
Hey,
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00:01:07,350 --> 00:01:08,910
how did Tina's checkup go?
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Fine, she'll be out in a minute. Turns
out it wasn't an infection.
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Okay, what I meant is, is it over and
can we go to the mall now?
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I'm sorry, are your friends waiting for
you at the mall?
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Yeah, I mean, I'm like 15. Okay, what I
meant was shut up.
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I'm just glad that Tina likes this
doctor. It's the first one in years she
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hasn't bitten.
27
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You have got one feisty little daughter,
Mrs. Miller.
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Oh, my God, she didn't take a snap at
you, did she?
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Oh, no.
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Why, is she a biter?
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No, no.
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I just stay away from this general area.
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So, have you met my other daughter,
Lauren?
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Hi. Tina says the nicest things about
you.
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Really? No. She wants you to run away so
she can take all your stuff.
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This guy's great.
37
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By the way, if you have any old toys
lying around, I have this donation box
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00:02:03,540 --> 00:02:07,340
here. We're having a rummage sale to
raise money to keep kids off drugs.
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00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:09,280
Oh, I'm all for that.
40
00:02:09,759 --> 00:02:12,440
Unless it's the kind of drugs that make
them sleep on an airplane.
41
00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:17,580
So you do a lot of charity work? It's
rewarding.
42
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And I am stressed kind of thin.
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In fact, I have a fundraiser tomorrow
and nobody to babysit my granddaughter.
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And I need someone really responsible.
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Hey, Lauren... She doesn't babysit.
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Sure I do. No, no, not with your plate
being so full with school and dance and
47
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the school dance and...
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Dance school.
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00:02:44,280 --> 00:02:46,920
Doctor, your wife is on the phone. Oh,
excuse me.
50
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I got into that dancing school?
51
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No.
52
00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:53,660
I just don't want you babysitting for
the doctor.
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Well, why not?
54
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Lauren, we finally found a doctor that
Tina likes.
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I don't want you screwing that up by
being irresponsible.
56
00:03:01,040 --> 00:03:02,240
I am not irresponsible.
57
00:03:03,920 --> 00:03:07,400
at the time you babysat for the
Sullivans and they gave you their cell
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00:03:07,400 --> 00:03:09,460
emergencies and you used it all night
long.
59
00:03:09,780 --> 00:03:13,000
Okay, Tiffany spread a rumor that I have
to shave my chin.
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00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:15,840
And if that's not an emergency, I don't
know what is.
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All I'm saying is I can't take a chance.
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00:03:19,060 --> 00:03:21,300
So, how about the babysitting?
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00:03:21,680 --> 00:03:26,700
Yeah, I'm sorry, I can't. Did I mention
that it pays $15 an hour?
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Oh, I'm sorry, I can.
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00:03:35,280 --> 00:03:37,260
going to take these board games for Dr.
Bloom's toy drive.
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I'm babysitting for him again tonight.
That's the third time this week.
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When did we buy those board games?
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That month the TV was broken.
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Oh, yeah. Black April.
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Get those things out of here.
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Just remember, Lauren. I know, Mom. Be
responsible.
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00:03:53,640 --> 00:03:57,200
Yeah, we don't want a repeat of when you
babysat for the Davises and you loaned
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out their Porsche for a joyride.
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00:03:59,380 --> 00:04:02,480
Okay, how is that my fault? Dad's the
one who asked to borrow it.
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Because I was testing you and you
failed, Lauren. You failed.
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00:04:12,510 --> 00:04:13,590
Who's a great car seller?
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I'm a great car seller.
78
00:04:15,670 --> 00:04:16,950
I'm a great car seller.
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00:04:17,649 --> 00:04:21,010
Oh, my God. You found someone to buy Mr.
Puff and Chug already?
80
00:04:21,250 --> 00:04:23,310
His name is Crunk and he'll be over in
about two hours.
81
00:04:24,870 --> 00:04:25,870
Crunk?
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It's short for crazy drunk.
83
00:04:28,030 --> 00:04:31,210
He's a great guy. You know, he hangs out
at the arcade. If you give him a
84
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dollar, you can hit him as hard as you
want.
85
00:04:33,740 --> 00:04:36,320
I'm going to let some guy named Crunk
buy my car.
86
00:04:36,660 --> 00:04:39,720
Why not? He's got the money and he wants
to buy it, so what's the problem? Yeah,
87
00:04:39,760 --> 00:04:41,320
I'm sorry. You're just going to have to
keep looking, okay?
88
00:04:41,600 --> 00:04:45,220
I don't want Mr. Puffin Chug being
driven around by some crazy weirdo.
89
00:04:48,160 --> 00:04:50,840
You don't have to say it out loud. We're
all thinking it.
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00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:55,780
Hey, hope you're ready for a big
surprise.
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00:04:56,260 --> 00:04:59,160
Fitz, you're not coming in unless you
promise me you're wearing pants.
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00:05:00,260 --> 00:05:02,000
And this time, swear.
93
00:05:03,950 --> 00:05:06,290
Don't be ridiculous, Bill. That's a
summer trick.
94
00:05:08,910 --> 00:05:09,910
Isn't he great?
95
00:05:09,990 --> 00:05:12,610
His name's Butch. He's a retired police
dog.
96
00:05:12,890 --> 00:05:17,210
Are you sure he's retired? Maybe the
Sarge took his badge because he's a
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cannon who plays by his own set of
rules.
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00:05:20,490 --> 00:05:23,030
He was on the force for eight years,
sniffing out drugs.
99
00:05:23,450 --> 00:05:26,490
You remember that big heroin bust at
that farm up in Cumberland County?
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00:05:26,850 --> 00:05:29,350
He actually found a needle in a
haystack.
101
00:05:30,140 --> 00:05:33,820
So, you seen him in action yet? No, but
I've been dying to. Yeah, I let him
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search my son's room.
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Nothing.
104
00:05:36,080 --> 00:05:37,200
What's up with kids nowadays?
105
00:05:38,820 --> 00:05:42,800
Hey, you remember that stuffed bear we
kept our stash in back in high school?
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Smokey?
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00:05:44,660 --> 00:05:46,760
Smokey of Mellowstone Park.
108
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Higher than the average bear.
109
00:05:51,610 --> 00:05:54,890
Yeah, we were going to put our stash in
a book, but then we thought people would
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get suspicious if we had a book, huh?
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00:05:57,510 --> 00:06:00,710
I think Smokey's down in the basement.
Let's see if the dog can sniff him out.
112
00:06:01,990 --> 00:06:03,390
Oh, hey, buddy.
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Fitz, is this your dog?
114
00:06:04,910 --> 00:06:07,250
Yeah, that's Butch. He's an old retired
police dog.
115
00:06:07,530 --> 00:06:10,190
Judy, do we still have that teddy bear
from high school? You know, the one
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wearing the tie -dyed shirt?
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00:06:11,530 --> 00:06:14,510
Oh, yeah, I saw it just the other day.
Lauren pulled it out with the other toys
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to donate to Dr. Bloom.
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00:06:16,910 --> 00:06:18,990
That was Smokey. Are you crazy?
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Who's Smokey?
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Remember the bear with the pot belly?
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Oh, my God, that was Smokey? I thought
you got rid of him years ago.
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00:06:29,080 --> 00:06:33,380
I was going to, but that night Yellow
Submarine came on, and then I guess I
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forgot.
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00:06:35,580 --> 00:06:38,980
Well, the last time you saw him, he
wasn't holding, was he? I don't
126
00:06:39,440 --> 00:06:43,260
Well, how come you don't remember?
Because it was years ago, and I had a
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bear full of pot.
128
00:06:45,840 --> 00:06:48,600
Well, what's the big deal? Why don't you
just call this doctor and say you want
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it back, because it had sentimental
value.
130
00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:51,420
Or street value.
131
00:06:52,460 --> 00:06:55,480
He can't, because if he already found
the bear and what's inside of it, he'll
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00:06:55,480 --> 00:06:59,460
know we're the idiots that donated a pot
bear to his anti -drug charity.
133
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So, let's go down to his office and
steal it back.
134
00:07:02,940 --> 00:07:05,860
You want to take Butch? He's trained for
this sort of thing. No, I'm not going
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00:07:05,860 --> 00:07:08,260
to bring an old, incontinent dog to Dr.
Bloom's office.
136
00:07:08,600 --> 00:07:13,320
Hey, he might be old, but he's not...
You got a paper towel?
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God, no one's here. Start digging.
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00:07:26,870 --> 00:07:27,870
Mrs. Miller?
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00:07:28,790 --> 00:07:29,790
Can I help you?
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00:07:30,030 --> 00:07:32,710
Uh, we're just donating some toys.
141
00:07:34,070 --> 00:07:38,410
Why is he digging through the paper? You
know, I work in a medical office, too.
142
00:07:38,490 --> 00:07:40,510
Wow, we have a sliding window.
143
00:07:40,830 --> 00:07:42,130
Also, Bill, hurry it up.
144
00:07:43,130 --> 00:07:45,070
I don't see Smokey. Keep digging.
145
00:07:45,370 --> 00:07:46,770
Oh, Dr.
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00:07:47,090 --> 00:07:48,890
Bloom, this is my husband, Bill.
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Oh, nice to meet you. Thanks for the
contributions.
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00:07:53,100 --> 00:07:54,100
No problem.
149
00:07:54,240 --> 00:07:56,400
I'll need a receipt for these for my
taxes.
150
00:07:57,500 --> 00:08:00,540
Oh, Amy, if my wife calls, will you tell
her I'll meet her at the theater?
151
00:08:00,820 --> 00:08:06,300
Sure. But I can't believe you're
donating more toys, especially with the
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00:08:06,300 --> 00:08:08,940
boxes that Lauren already dropped off at
my house.
153
00:08:10,300 --> 00:08:12,220
Are there toys at your house, too?
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00:08:12,560 --> 00:08:13,600
Yes, there are.
155
00:08:14,320 --> 00:08:16,880
You folks are very generous.
156
00:08:17,530 --> 00:08:19,010
Well, we had a big stash at home.
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Of toys.
158
00:08:20,630 --> 00:08:24,090
Well, Doc, we better go and do more good
deeds.
159
00:08:24,610 --> 00:08:26,250
You guys are unbelievable.
160
00:08:27,130 --> 00:08:28,390
We've heard that before.
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00:08:30,450 --> 00:08:34,390
Let's go to his house and find the bear
before it falls into the wrong hands.
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00:08:34,650 --> 00:08:36,270
We're good people. Put the toy car back.
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00:08:37,370 --> 00:08:38,630
Pam, I'll never get any.
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aren't you? That's right, young lady.
Where are the drugs?
165
00:08:55,900 --> 00:08:58,340
What? Why would there be drugs here?
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00:08:58,620 --> 00:09:02,340
It could happen through a crazy series
of events.
167
00:09:03,380 --> 00:09:05,660
Are those the toys you brought over from
our house?
168
00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:06,920
Yeah.
169
00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:11,140
Dr. Bloom's taking them to his
fundraiser tomorrow.
170
00:09:11,560 --> 00:09:14,380
What are you guys doing? There's an old
toy in here we need back.
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00:09:14,780 --> 00:09:17,980
Dad, I already told you, you can't play
with it anymore. Two of the hungry
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00:09:17,980 --> 00:09:18,980
hippos are broken.
173
00:09:20,920 --> 00:09:22,280
Where is that bear?
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00:09:22,890 --> 00:09:24,410
It's not here. Crap!
175
00:09:24,730 --> 00:09:26,170
You said a bad word.
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00:09:26,990 --> 00:09:27,990
I'm sorry.
177
00:09:28,330 --> 00:09:33,910
Oh, my God. Bill, look at that cute
little toy that Ella has.
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00:09:34,310 --> 00:09:35,310
Oh.
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00:09:35,710 --> 00:09:37,230
Sweetie, can we see your bear?
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00:09:37,470 --> 00:09:39,650
No, he's mine. Lauren gave him to me.
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00:09:39,970 --> 00:09:40,990
She loves that bear.
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00:09:41,270 --> 00:09:44,010
Come on, honey. Let me take a look just
for a minute.
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I'll trade you for this nice car.
184
00:09:48,390 --> 00:09:49,390
Unbelievable.
185
00:09:50,330 --> 00:09:52,270
Can we just see it for a second? No.
186
00:09:52,520 --> 00:09:54,460
Come on, kid, don't Bogart the bear.
187
00:09:54,740 --> 00:09:55,740
No, no!
188
00:09:56,200 --> 00:09:57,200
No!
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00:09:59,340 --> 00:10:02,820
Oh, so you guys are branching out now.
You're ruining other people's children,
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00:10:02,920 --> 00:10:03,920
too.
191
00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:13,320
Okay, I finally got her to calm down,
but I couldn't get the bear away from
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00:10:13,520 --> 00:10:14,620
But we need the bear.
193
00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:16,380
Why? What's the big deal?
194
00:10:17,840 --> 00:10:22,400
All right, look. There's a small chance
that bear may have something hidden
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00:10:22,400 --> 00:10:24,520
inside of it. Like what, drugs?
196
00:10:26,020 --> 00:10:27,020
Oh, my God.
197
00:10:28,680 --> 00:10:34,880
Listen, a long time ago, your father and
I did a little experimenting with some
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00:10:34,880 --> 00:10:35,880
marijuana.
199
00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:40,440
Not much, mind you, just enough to get
us through a few Jethro Tull concerts.
200
00:10:41,720 --> 00:10:43,060
Guys, I'm not stupid.
201
00:10:43,260 --> 00:10:46,780
I mean, Dad still wears a T -shirt that
says, Doobie University Rolling Team.
202
00:10:47,900 --> 00:10:51,840
Hey, Doobie University is a fully
accredited... Give it up, Bill.
203
00:10:53,960 --> 00:10:58,440
Look, we admit we made some bad choices
back in high school.
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00:10:58,760 --> 00:10:59,760
Jethro Tull.
205
00:11:00,320 --> 00:11:02,720
But it was a different time back then.
206
00:11:03,140 --> 00:11:05,060
We were protecting a war.
207
00:11:05,660 --> 00:11:07,700
No. What war?
208
00:11:09,500 --> 00:11:10,500
Grenada.
209
00:11:11,760 --> 00:11:13,500
I was on agile that week.
210
00:11:15,140 --> 00:11:19,500
Look, just because we did some really
stupid stuff when we were younger
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00:11:19,500 --> 00:11:21,100
mean that you should ever.
212
00:11:21,840 --> 00:11:25,380
Don't worry, Mom. You and Dad are all
the reason I need not to do drugs.
213
00:11:27,020 --> 00:11:28,020
Thank you.
214
00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:30,000
Hey.
215
00:11:30,460 --> 00:11:33,860
But I can't believe that you would think
that I would mess up this job. And you
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00:11:33,860 --> 00:11:37,180
guys messed it up for me. I mean, the
Blooms were even thinking about taking
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00:11:37,180 --> 00:11:38,760
on their family vacation to Cancun.
218
00:11:39,660 --> 00:11:42,260
Bad idea. That bear will never clear
customs.
219
00:11:45,480 --> 00:11:48,500
If you want the bear, you can take it
once Ella falls asleep.
220
00:11:49,280 --> 00:11:50,059
What's this?
221
00:11:50,060 --> 00:11:52,780
Oh, you may not recognize it. It's
called a baby monitor.
222
00:11:53,100 --> 00:11:56,280
Responsible parents use them to make
sure their kids are okay. Hey, they
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00:11:56,280 --> 00:11:57,960
have these when you were young.
224
00:11:58,180 --> 00:12:02,280
Oh, that's right. They didn't have baby
monitors, car seats, fresh fruit, socks.
225
00:12:04,560 --> 00:12:05,820
You're alive, aren't you?
226
00:12:08,620 --> 00:12:14,040
A, B, C, D, E, F, G. Seems herself to
sleep.
227
00:12:49,320 --> 00:12:50,400
So, what do you think?
228
00:12:51,380 --> 00:12:52,440
I like it.
229
00:12:52,940 --> 00:12:56,040
Yeah, so did the last eight people who
took a test drive.
230
00:12:56,840 --> 00:12:58,360
Why didn't any of them buy it?
231
00:12:59,300 --> 00:13:03,140
Well, I'm just waiting for the right
person. You can understand that, can't
232
00:13:03,180 --> 00:13:04,260
Andy? Oh, yeah.
233
00:13:07,140 --> 00:13:08,500
This car's a beauty.
234
00:13:08,940 --> 00:13:10,360
She drives real smooth.
235
00:13:10,620 --> 00:13:12,400
And she's got a nice, quiet engine.
236
00:13:15,580 --> 00:13:16,580
Key.
237
00:13:17,600 --> 00:13:18,640
I'm sorry? Key.
238
00:13:19,760 --> 00:13:20,760
The car's a he.
239
00:13:21,140 --> 00:13:22,440
His name is Mr. Puffinchuck.
240
00:13:23,500 --> 00:13:24,500
Here we go.
241
00:13:25,700 --> 00:13:28,100
You know, it sounds kind of nutty, but I
named him.
242
00:13:28,340 --> 00:13:29,920
No, it's adorable.
243
00:13:30,760 --> 00:13:32,520
My last car was named Go Berry.
244
00:13:33,240 --> 00:13:34,240
Hello, Mr.
245
00:13:34,540 --> 00:13:35,540
Puffinchuck.
246
00:13:36,020 --> 00:13:37,780
Oh, my God, there's two of them.
247
00:13:39,520 --> 00:13:40,520
Looks like Mr.
248
00:13:40,640 --> 00:13:43,040
Puffinchuck might have a nice living
home in your garage.
249
00:13:43,380 --> 00:13:44,380
He sure will.
250
00:13:44,680 --> 00:13:45,940
Except I don't have a garage.
251
00:13:47,340 --> 00:13:49,460
What? Oh, I park on the street.
252
00:13:50,580 --> 00:13:51,580
Oh.
253
00:13:52,180 --> 00:13:54,860
In the snow, in the rain, in the bird
number two.
254
00:13:55,240 --> 00:13:56,240
No, we're done here.
255
00:13:56,520 --> 00:14:01,560
What? No, no, we are not done. Would you
consider buying a car cover?
256
00:14:02,240 --> 00:14:05,380
Those are kind of a hassle. Okay, take
us home. No.
257
00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:10,120
Would you just pull over for a second? I
need to talk to my business associate
258
00:14:10,120 --> 00:14:11,120
here.
259
00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:24,060
What's wrong with you? She's perfect.
She drives 10 miles an hour and likes
260
00:14:24,060 --> 00:14:25,060
crazy car names.
261
00:14:25,100 --> 00:14:26,640
Mr. Puffinchug wouldn't even know you're
gone.
262
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:29,200
I'm not going to let her leave Mr.
263
00:14:29,420 --> 00:14:31,600
Puffinchug outside in the cold and the
rain all night long.
264
00:14:31,960 --> 00:14:34,180
It's a car, not a person.
265
00:14:35,160 --> 00:14:37,540
Okay, if you're going to start talking
crazy, I can't deal with you.
266
00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:42,040
I'm sorry. All I'm saying is, Mr.
267
00:14:42,420 --> 00:14:46,800
Puffinchug is stronger than you think,
and you spent nine years raising him
268
00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:48,980
right, but it is time to let go.
269
00:14:54,890 --> 00:14:58,430
I know, you're right. She seems like a
nice person. I'm sure she'll take good
270
00:14:58,430 --> 00:14:59,430
care of him.
271
00:15:01,330 --> 00:15:02,930
I guess it's time for us to say goodbye.
272
00:15:07,730 --> 00:15:10,590
Wow, it really does have a quiet engine.
273
00:16:21,390 --> 00:16:22,390
Let's find us some weed.
274
00:17:13,420 --> 00:17:14,460
There's no pot in it.
275
00:17:14,880 --> 00:17:15,880
Pot?
276
00:17:16,380 --> 00:17:18,180
What the hell's going on here?
277
00:17:18,440 --> 00:17:19,920
I don't know, but I would call the cops.
278
00:17:24,859 --> 00:17:30,580
So you broke into my sleeping
granddaughter's room with a drug
279
00:17:30,580 --> 00:17:33,980
find a bear that you stuffed with
Reaper?
280
00:17:35,360 --> 00:17:37,740
When you put it like that, it sounds
criminal.
281
00:17:38,020 --> 00:17:39,160
It is criminal.
282
00:17:40,320 --> 00:17:42,680
Come on, Tosh. The bear was empty.
283
00:17:43,340 --> 00:17:45,920
So 20 years ago, Bill and Judy had a
little pot.
284
00:17:46,300 --> 00:17:48,560
It's not like they were in here smoking
a bong.
285
00:17:48,840 --> 00:17:49,840
Thank you, Fitz.
286
00:17:50,180 --> 00:17:51,180
What's a bong?
287
00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:53,620
Yes, thank you, Fitz.
288
00:17:55,420 --> 00:17:58,040
I think it's bedtime, Ella.
289
00:17:58,320 --> 00:17:59,320
Bong!
290
00:18:12,970 --> 00:18:16,250
just spun way out of control. We made a
mistake, but we didn't want to ruin our
291
00:18:16,250 --> 00:18:20,330
relationship with you. As opposed to
breaking into my granddaughter's room
292
00:18:20,330 --> 00:18:21,470
terrorizing her?
293
00:18:21,710 --> 00:18:22,850
Butch, get down from there.
294
00:18:26,030 --> 00:18:30,410
I'm so sorry. We will replace this.
295
00:18:32,070 --> 00:18:33,070
Hello?
296
00:18:37,090 --> 00:18:38,090
Well,
297
00:18:39,410 --> 00:18:43,360
it's medicinal, and I... I sometimes use
it in my practice.
298
00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:45,540
Oh, yeah? Where do you go to medical
school?
299
00:18:45,760 --> 00:18:46,760
Doobie University?
300
00:18:47,880 --> 00:18:49,480
Look, cut me some slack.
301
00:18:49,740 --> 00:18:53,000
I deal with screaming, snotty kids all
day.
302
00:18:53,280 --> 00:18:58,540
And I will not apologize for the
occasional recreational use of... Who
303
00:18:58,540 --> 00:18:59,860
belong to? It's theirs.
304
00:19:02,500 --> 00:19:03,920
I think you should leave.
305
00:19:05,700 --> 00:19:06,700
Come on, Bill.
306
00:19:07,040 --> 00:19:09,700
And find yourself another doctor. Way
ahead of you.
307
00:19:12,840 --> 00:19:15,580
She seems to like your bag, too. Get
that mutt out of here!
308
00:19:23,420 --> 00:19:24,420
Dr.
309
00:19:25,680 --> 00:19:26,680
Bloom, what are you doing here?
310
00:19:26,880 --> 00:19:31,000
Well, I came by because I wanted to tell
you that I'm sorry about everything
311
00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:32,000
that happened.
312
00:19:32,500 --> 00:19:35,860
And, uh, well, I'd just like to ask you
two questions.
313
00:19:36,880 --> 00:19:39,120
Sure. Well, the first is...
314
00:19:39,590 --> 00:19:42,630
Would you ever consider taking me back
as Tina's doctor?
315
00:19:43,470 --> 00:19:44,810
What's the second question?
316
00:19:45,010 --> 00:19:46,190
Do you have any ho -hos?
25143
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