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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,570 --> 00:00:06,150 Congratulations on your new satellite dish. 2 00:00:06,550 --> 00:00:09,550 For your safety, always blah, blah, blah. 3 00:00:10,230 --> 00:00:12,130 Never blah, blah, blah. 4 00:00:12,710 --> 00:00:14,510 How does the satellite dish work? 5 00:00:15,110 --> 00:00:18,750 Well, honey, you know when you look in the sky, you see stars? 6 00:00:19,250 --> 00:00:22,830 Mm -hmm. Well, those are the stars of your favorite TV shows. 7 00:00:23,410 --> 00:00:29,350 And the satellite dish sucks them out of the sky like a magic vacuum cleaner and 8 00:00:29,350 --> 00:00:30,350 puts them in our TV. 9 00:00:35,400 --> 00:00:38,380 You know, eventually she's going to get older and know you're just making stuff 10 00:00:38,380 --> 00:00:39,380 up. 11 00:00:39,540 --> 00:00:40,540 Am I? 12 00:00:41,280 --> 00:00:44,540 Yeah, you just told her that satellites suck TV shows out of the sky. 13 00:00:44,840 --> 00:00:45,840 Don't they? 14 00:00:46,360 --> 00:00:49,420 It doesn't make it true just because you say it like a question. 15 00:00:50,380 --> 00:00:51,380 Doesn't it? 16 00:01:06,090 --> 00:01:08,750 soon. Oh, your grandfather will be here any minute. 17 00:01:08,950 --> 00:01:10,270 I can't wait to see grandpa. 18 00:01:10,530 --> 00:01:11,970 I could really use the money. 19 00:01:13,390 --> 00:01:16,450 Hey, hey, what did I tell you about taking money from your grandfather? 20 00:01:16,950 --> 00:01:18,390 I know, you could have. 21 00:01:20,110 --> 00:01:21,109 Damn right. 22 00:01:21,110 --> 00:01:24,610 Now go upstairs and put on that ugly reindeer sweater he sent you for 23 00:01:24,850 --> 00:01:25,848 Good idea. 24 00:01:25,850 --> 00:01:27,390 See, I earned my half. 25 00:01:29,100 --> 00:01:32,340 Hello, loved ones and tolerated one. 26 00:01:33,260 --> 00:01:37,340 Hello, lifelong consequence of my sister's attempt to make another man 27 00:01:38,600 --> 00:01:41,880 Bill, your father called from the expressway. He should be here any 28 00:01:42,100 --> 00:01:46,580 great. That gives me about five minutes to grow a backbone and become a man, for 29 00:01:46,580 --> 00:01:47,580 God's sake. 30 00:01:48,140 --> 00:01:50,600 To quote the last Christmas card he sent me. 31 00:01:51,060 --> 00:01:54,800 Try and make an effort. He drove all the way up from Florida to see us, and you 32 00:01:54,800 --> 00:01:56,320 can use this time to work on your relationship. 33 00:01:56,890 --> 00:02:00,770 We have worked on it. We got it down to 20 beautiful minutes once every few 34 00:02:00,770 --> 00:02:05,530 years. Beautiful, huh? You two sit on the couch barely talking while he eats a 35 00:02:05,530 --> 00:02:07,650 bag of nuts, and once they're gone, so is he. 36 00:02:07,930 --> 00:02:10,110 I don't get it. He's such a sweet guy. 37 00:02:10,350 --> 00:02:13,630 You only like him because he feeds you all those cheesy compliments. 38 00:02:14,030 --> 00:02:15,030 I do not. 39 00:02:15,590 --> 00:02:17,410 Oh, God, that's probably him. 40 00:02:19,470 --> 00:02:23,070 I do realize you're prettying yourself up for my dad, right? 41 00:02:23,550 --> 00:02:24,570 You think I look pretty? 42 00:02:24,850 --> 00:02:25,850 Pretty creepy. 43 00:02:27,670 --> 00:02:28,670 Hey, Grandpa. 44 00:02:29,490 --> 00:02:31,990 Oh, my God, look at the size of you, sport. 45 00:02:32,410 --> 00:02:34,750 Last time I was here, you were a little pipsqueak. 46 00:02:35,030 --> 00:02:36,850 Now it looks like this joint has a bouncer. 47 00:02:37,890 --> 00:02:39,070 Hey, yeah. Honey. 48 00:02:40,370 --> 00:02:41,370 Grandpa. 49 00:02:41,590 --> 00:02:45,930 Look at you two, carrots up, pudding pop as beautiful as ever. 50 00:02:46,210 --> 00:02:48,230 I'm wearing that hoodie that you sent me. 51 00:02:48,490 --> 00:02:50,490 Did you put that on just so I'd give you money? 52 00:02:50,930 --> 00:02:51,930 Because it's working. 53 00:02:53,370 --> 00:02:55,730 I want money, too. 54 00:02:56,070 --> 00:02:57,070 Tina. 55 00:02:57,470 --> 00:02:58,830 I want money, please. 56 00:03:01,330 --> 00:03:06,530 Please. As long as you can answer one question. How does your mother get 57 00:03:06,530 --> 00:03:07,530 every year? 58 00:03:08,270 --> 00:03:12,670 Did you just giggle? 59 00:03:13,250 --> 00:03:14,510 Now look at this one. 60 00:03:15,190 --> 00:03:17,750 One sister just as pretty as the next. 61 00:03:19,990 --> 00:03:21,170 Oh, get out of here. 62 00:03:21,470 --> 00:03:22,470 Or stay. 63 00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:25,970 Okay, kids, go put half your money away. 64 00:03:26,360 --> 00:03:27,359 Hey, Dad. 65 00:03:27,360 --> 00:03:29,300 Hey, Bill. Good to see you. Come here, son. 66 00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:34,240 Oh! 67 00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:39,260 So, Al, how's Juanita? She's fine. 68 00:03:40,060 --> 00:03:41,460 Let me tell you something, Bill. 69 00:03:42,060 --> 00:03:45,500 It takes a brave man to marry a woman 20 years his junior. 70 00:03:46,140 --> 00:03:47,760 They can be very demanding. 71 00:03:48,960 --> 00:03:49,960 At bedtime. 72 00:03:51,660 --> 00:03:52,860 Sexually. Dad, Dad. 73 00:03:53,640 --> 00:03:54,640 We get it. 74 00:03:54,940 --> 00:03:58,060 So how's it going at that department store? They promote you to the makeup 75 00:03:58,060 --> 00:03:59,060 counter yet? 76 00:03:59,860 --> 00:04:01,080 Hey, I'm kidding. 77 00:04:01,760 --> 00:04:03,060 Why are you so sensitive? 78 00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:04,400 I didn't say anything. 79 00:04:04,500 --> 00:04:05,880 Okay, okay, I'll back off. 80 00:04:06,420 --> 00:04:09,760 Okay, we'll let you two talk. I'm sure you have a lot to catch up on. 81 00:04:20,820 --> 00:04:21,899 So how was the drive? 82 00:04:22,980 --> 00:04:23,980 Good. 83 00:04:31,850 --> 00:04:33,150 How's work? Good. 84 00:04:36,190 --> 00:04:40,350 I just wish Bill would develop some sort of relationship with his father. I 85 00:04:40,350 --> 00:04:43,330 mean, he never comes by. The kids barely know their grandfather. 86 00:04:43,790 --> 00:04:45,030 Yeah, that's sad. 87 00:04:45,410 --> 00:04:47,550 But the important thing is, he said I was pretty. 88 00:04:48,370 --> 00:04:50,690 Honey, come say goodbye. My dad's leaving. 89 00:04:51,350 --> 00:04:54,490 Already? Al, we were hoping you'd stay for dinner. 90 00:04:54,750 --> 00:04:59,150 No, thanks, honey. I got to check into my motel, and then I'm getting together 91 00:04:59,150 --> 00:05:00,150 with some friends. 92 00:05:00,590 --> 00:05:02,330 Well, Bill, why don't you go with your dad? 93 00:05:02,630 --> 00:05:03,630 What? What? 94 00:05:03,850 --> 00:05:07,690 Yeah, it might be fun, and you'd love to have him there, wouldn't you, Al? 95 00:05:09,930 --> 00:05:10,930 I guess. 96 00:05:11,910 --> 00:05:12,910 You want to go? 97 00:05:13,850 --> 00:05:14,850 I guess. 98 00:05:14,970 --> 00:05:16,850 Great! So where are you guys going to go? 99 00:05:17,130 --> 00:05:20,030 I'm meeting some buddies from the steel mill. You know, we're going to go to the 100 00:05:20,030 --> 00:05:22,910 Sears Tower and visit our old pal Ernie and have a drink. 101 00:05:23,150 --> 00:05:24,950 Oh, Ernie lives in the Sears Tower. 102 00:05:25,490 --> 00:05:29,070 Sort of. He fell into the blast furnace when we were making the beams. 103 00:05:30,480 --> 00:05:32,660 We're pretty sure he's holding up the 32nd floor. 104 00:05:33,480 --> 00:05:35,980 So you toasted him, now you're toasting him. 105 00:05:36,200 --> 00:05:38,940 Hey, a little respect for the dead. Sorry. 106 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:45,780 So I'm punching the hell out of Bernie, but that dumb son of a bitch won't go 107 00:05:45,780 --> 00:05:49,480 down. Oh, you father love that dumb son of a bitch. 108 00:05:50,940 --> 00:05:52,540 What were you guys fighting about? 109 00:05:54,060 --> 00:05:56,140 What the hell difference does that make? 110 00:05:57,540 --> 00:05:59,400 So now, I got a dilemma. 111 00:06:00,110 --> 00:06:04,170 I get to give him enough of a beating so that he don't remember what happened, 112 00:06:04,210 --> 00:06:05,630 but not enough so that he dies! 113 00:06:06,770 --> 00:06:09,490 And Ernie's back at work the next day. 114 00:06:09,930 --> 00:06:12,930 That's how precise a beating your old man could lay on someone. 115 00:06:13,750 --> 00:06:14,750 To Ernie! 116 00:06:14,990 --> 00:06:15,990 To Ernie! 117 00:06:16,250 --> 00:06:20,970 Lift your glass, you deaf bastard, with toasting Ernie! 118 00:06:21,670 --> 00:06:23,810 To Ernie! 119 00:06:24,250 --> 00:06:28,970 Hey, hey, you ought to tell that story about how you beat him up. 120 00:06:31,310 --> 00:06:32,530 Minds is a little hard of hearing. 121 00:06:32,770 --> 00:06:34,450 Too many shifts near the grinder. 122 00:06:35,190 --> 00:06:38,950 So, Al, how come you never got your boy a job at the mill? Well, he couldn't 123 00:06:38,950 --> 00:06:41,650 have cut it. He was old as a clean fingernails book -running type. 124 00:06:41,850 --> 00:06:42,850 Oh, 125 00:06:43,090 --> 00:06:44,630 Billy's a college boy, huh? 126 00:06:44,950 --> 00:06:46,730 I only went for six weeks. 127 00:06:46,970 --> 00:06:49,470 Yeah, we're drinking with Walter Shakespeare over here. It's William. 128 00:06:49,730 --> 00:06:52,750 Oh, college boy wants us to call him William. 129 00:06:53,030 --> 00:06:57,930 No, no, no, that's not my name. That's Shakespeare's. Well, it is my name, too, 130 00:06:58,050 --> 00:07:00,610 but... Calm down, son. You're embarrassing yourself. 131 00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:05,720 Look, let's get out of here and find a place to watch the hockey game. You 132 00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:09,140 I just got a new satellite dish. We can watch it back at my place. Fine. 133 00:07:09,900 --> 00:07:11,640 Slim Scully and I will meet you there. 134 00:07:11,860 --> 00:07:12,900 See you there, college boy. 135 00:07:13,100 --> 00:07:14,100 I flunked out. 136 00:07:14,320 --> 00:07:16,320 What? I flunked out. 137 00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:19,780 Hey, watch your mouth. This is a classy place. 138 00:07:26,140 --> 00:07:27,140 Grimes, that's mine. 139 00:07:27,940 --> 00:07:29,300 Grimes, that's my beer. 140 00:07:29,860 --> 00:07:30,860 Grimes! 141 00:07:31,920 --> 00:07:32,920 I'll keep it. 142 00:07:34,060 --> 00:07:35,820 Oh, look who's home from the bar early. 143 00:07:36,520 --> 00:07:40,640 And who's the, uh... You can say old geezer. He can't hear a word you're 144 00:07:41,380 --> 00:07:42,359 Where's your dad? 145 00:07:42,360 --> 00:07:46,260 Well, he was supposed to meet us back here, but that was a couple hours ago, 146 00:07:46,260 --> 00:07:47,260 I'm guessing he ditched us. 147 00:07:47,460 --> 00:07:48,520 Why would he do that? 148 00:07:48,720 --> 00:07:51,840 Because he didn't want me to go in the first place, and I didn't want to go. 149 00:07:51,840 --> 00:07:53,780 only person who wants us to be together is you. 150 00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:58,800 You are being so stubborn. I am not being stubborn. I just decided a long 151 00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:01,360 ago it's just not worth it. Oh, yes. 152 00:08:01,660 --> 00:08:06,320 The famous bow hunting trip let it go. Three miserable days of him trying to 153 00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:08,400 make me into a man, for God's sake. 154 00:08:09,120 --> 00:08:12,360 What do you need a tent for? Shelter, Dad. How about shelter? 155 00:08:12,960 --> 00:08:16,500 Bears don't need tents. Yeah, because they have fur and a cave. 156 00:08:16,880 --> 00:08:18,420 Where's my cave, Dad? 157 00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:21,440 Oh, that's nice. You made it into a little play. 158 00:08:21,860 --> 00:08:25,840 He caps it all off by putting a fake arrow through his head and letting me 159 00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:28,040 I shot him. It was a little joke. 160 00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:29,660 Oh, yeah, real funny. 161 00:08:30,300 --> 00:08:32,299 Knock, knock. Who's there? You killed your father. 162 00:08:34,960 --> 00:08:36,080 I'm turning in. 163 00:08:40,340 --> 00:08:42,740 Grimes, Grimes, this isn't your house. 164 00:08:43,320 --> 00:08:44,700 You don't live here. 165 00:08:45,320 --> 00:08:46,320 Grimes! 166 00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:53,220 Hey. Hey, Grimes. 167 00:08:53,480 --> 00:08:56,400 Oh, Ronald's coming over. We're going to train for the Math Olympics. 168 00:08:56,600 --> 00:08:57,600 Math Olympics? 169 00:08:58,640 --> 00:09:00,080 What country are you competing for? 170 00:09:00,720 --> 00:09:01,720 Nerdlandia? 171 00:09:02,060 --> 00:09:05,620 Go ahead and joke, Dad, but these math competitions are fierce and grueling. 172 00:09:05,700 --> 00:09:09,800 Your father and I will be there Saturday to cheer you on. Oh, Saturday. 173 00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:11,940 Let me just check my day planner. 174 00:09:13,680 --> 00:09:17,000 Ah, that's the night of the WCW Slugfest. 175 00:09:17,440 --> 00:09:21,200 Dad, don't worry about it. It's the regional finals. You know, most parents 176 00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:23,100 have a video camera. Maybe I can get you a tape. 177 00:09:23,320 --> 00:09:24,600 Great. We'll put it with the others. 178 00:09:27,069 --> 00:09:28,290 What? He said it was okay. 179 00:09:28,590 --> 00:09:30,470 But he doesn't mean it, and it's not okay. 180 00:09:30,690 --> 00:09:32,690 Judy, it's a math meet. 181 00:09:33,150 --> 00:09:37,050 And math plus bill equals slumber. 182 00:09:40,350 --> 00:09:41,350 Hello? 183 00:09:41,990 --> 00:09:43,610 Yeah, Al Miller's my father. 184 00:09:45,310 --> 00:09:46,310 What? 185 00:09:47,070 --> 00:09:48,070 Where? 186 00:09:49,390 --> 00:09:52,990 Okay, okay, we'll be right there. That was Good Samaritan Hospital. Apparently 187 00:09:52,990 --> 00:09:54,590 my dad's in the cardiac ward. 188 00:09:54,870 --> 00:09:56,150 Oh, my God, Brian, what? 189 00:09:56,460 --> 00:09:59,480 Tina, we'll be back in a little while. Don't tell the kids. You're right. We 190 00:09:59,480 --> 00:10:00,480 don't want to panic them. 191 00:10:00,620 --> 00:10:01,620 Panic me about what? 192 00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:05,420 Nothing. Your mother and I just have to rush down to the hospital. The hospital? 193 00:10:05,860 --> 00:10:10,160 No big deal. If you need us, we'll be in the cardiac ward. The cardiac ward? 194 00:10:10,860 --> 00:10:14,480 Nice job not panicking him, Bill. I didn't tell him it was Grandpa. 195 00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:16,000 Grandpa? 196 00:10:17,360 --> 00:10:23,360 Oh, my God. He looks terrible. It can't be good. 197 00:10:23,580 --> 00:10:24,580 We don't know that. 198 00:10:24,740 --> 00:10:25,860 Judy, this has got to be... 199 00:10:26,220 --> 00:10:30,320 My dad never goes to doctors. This is a guy who once told me a little gangrene 200 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:31,320 never hurt anybody. 201 00:10:33,780 --> 00:10:36,040 That's his dad. Could you tell us what's wrong with him? 202 00:10:36,320 --> 00:10:37,320 Let's see. 203 00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:41,320 Well, you'll have to wait for the doctor, but if you want to say something 204 00:10:41,320 --> 00:10:42,780 him, I'd say it quick. 205 00:10:43,380 --> 00:10:44,420 Did you hear that? 206 00:10:44,760 --> 00:10:47,380 Okay, calm down. We don't have all the details. 207 00:10:47,620 --> 00:10:49,620 She said if I want to talk to him, I should do it quick. 208 00:10:49,920 --> 00:10:52,200 Stop assuming the worst. That could mean anything. 209 00:10:52,840 --> 00:10:53,980 Like what, Judy? What? 210 00:10:54,330 --> 00:10:57,130 What? I don't know. Your father's dying. I was trying to be nice. 211 00:10:58,190 --> 00:10:59,190 Bill. 212 00:10:59,710 --> 00:11:01,430 Bill. He's waking up. What should I do? 213 00:11:01,670 --> 00:11:03,230 Talk to him. This could be your last chance. 214 00:11:05,310 --> 00:11:06,310 Hey, Dad. 215 00:11:06,770 --> 00:11:08,010 Man, I don't know what happened. 216 00:11:08,870 --> 00:11:12,070 I was having this terrible pain, so I took a cab over here. 217 00:11:13,390 --> 00:11:15,650 And now they're doing all sorts of tests on my heart. 218 00:11:16,990 --> 00:11:22,630 Bill, in case I don't get a chance to say it, sorry for ditching you last 219 00:11:22,870 --> 00:11:23,819 No. 220 00:11:23,820 --> 00:11:24,820 Oh, it was funny. 221 00:11:25,660 --> 00:11:26,800 Grindsteak for breakfast. 222 00:11:27,740 --> 00:11:34,160 Bill, I'm glad you had fun. Sometimes I feel like... like you don't like 223 00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:35,200 spending time with me. 224 00:11:35,420 --> 00:11:39,700 No, I don't know where you got that. I love spending time with you. 225 00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:42,880 Really? Sure, we had some great times together. 226 00:11:43,300 --> 00:11:44,300 What was your favorite? 227 00:11:46,800 --> 00:11:48,820 Just pick one. Any one at all. 228 00:11:49,840 --> 00:11:56,060 Uh... Well, I... Guess that bow hunting trip we went on was fun. 229 00:11:56,520 --> 00:11:58,380 Oh, I thought you hated that trip. 230 00:11:58,620 --> 00:12:04,740 No, it really toughened me up. You know, being in the forest in the dead of 231 00:12:04,740 --> 00:12:07,200 winter. You pretending I killed you. 232 00:12:07,980 --> 00:12:10,340 Me crying till my face froze. 233 00:12:11,100 --> 00:12:14,040 Yeah, that was a fun time. 234 00:12:15,820 --> 00:12:17,860 I hope we can do that again sometime. 235 00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:19,920 Yeah. 236 00:12:24,690 --> 00:12:27,050 Sure. It'd be great to do that again. 237 00:12:27,970 --> 00:12:29,690 All right, Mr. Miller. 238 00:12:30,530 --> 00:12:32,310 Your tests were fine. You can go home. 239 00:12:33,790 --> 00:12:35,810 Is everyone okay, Doc? He's okay? 240 00:12:36,090 --> 00:12:37,690 Yeah, just a little acid reflux. 241 00:12:37,990 --> 00:12:40,890 You might be a little shaky for a couple of hours. That's why I called your son 242 00:12:40,890 --> 00:12:43,410 to drive you home. So my father's not dying? 243 00:12:43,990 --> 00:12:45,750 Dying, no. He'll bury us all. 244 00:12:46,250 --> 00:12:49,110 But the nurse said if we had something to say to him, we should say it quick. 245 00:12:49,630 --> 00:12:51,710 Yeah, she is a real stickler for her visiting hours. 246 00:12:53,830 --> 00:12:55,690 Tonight, take it easy. Tomorrow, back to normal. 247 00:12:55,950 --> 00:12:58,950 The big question is, when can I go bow hunting with my son? 248 00:12:59,330 --> 00:13:01,290 Anytime. You hear that, son? 249 00:13:01,530 --> 00:13:04,030 The Miller men have a date with the great outdoors. 250 00:13:05,870 --> 00:13:07,270 Okay, visiting hours are over. 251 00:13:07,510 --> 00:13:09,250 Oh, you couldn't have said that the first time? 252 00:13:15,230 --> 00:13:17,630 Bravo, C -SPAN, MTV, history. 253 00:13:18,910 --> 00:13:21,130 Showtime. Cooking, learning, QVC. 254 00:13:21,790 --> 00:13:23,150 Chinese, Chinese, Chinese. 255 00:13:24,830 --> 00:13:27,770 What are you doing? I thought you and your dad would be getting ready for the 256 00:13:27,770 --> 00:13:31,010 big bow hunting trip. I haven't heard from him. I'm just hoping he's forgotten 257 00:13:31,010 --> 00:13:32,010 all about it. 258 00:13:32,170 --> 00:13:37,090 You know, kind of like my birthdays, my graduation, my first name a couple of 259 00:13:37,090 --> 00:13:38,090 times. 260 00:13:38,950 --> 00:13:41,250 Oh, what a beautiful day out there. 261 00:13:41,930 --> 00:13:45,250 Billy, get your lazy butt off that sofa. Come and help me with this stuff. 262 00:13:45,450 --> 00:13:46,450 Where'd you get all this? 263 00:13:46,680 --> 00:13:48,980 I borrowed it from Slim for our trip tomorrow. 264 00:13:49,420 --> 00:13:54,380 Tomorrow? I learned the other day that the future is now. Life is a very 265 00:13:54,380 --> 00:13:55,380 precious thing. 266 00:13:58,240 --> 00:14:00,460 Let's go out there and kill us some deer. 267 00:14:02,080 --> 00:14:04,180 Gee, gee, Dad, I don't know. 268 00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:07,400 Bill's not really the hunting type of guy. 269 00:14:07,660 --> 00:14:12,060 Don't sell Bill short as a hunter. After all, he bagged the most beautiful girl 270 00:14:12,060 --> 00:14:13,059 in Chicago. 271 00:14:13,060 --> 00:14:14,440 Oh, go on, you... 272 00:14:16,330 --> 00:14:17,330 Have a good weekend. 273 00:14:18,690 --> 00:14:22,390 The thing is, Dad, I was planning to watch a fight tomorrow night. 274 00:14:22,610 --> 00:14:26,890 What fight? I ordered the WCW Slugfest on pay -per -view. What, that fake 275 00:14:26,890 --> 00:14:29,730 wrestling with the phony balonies and tights? That's not a fight. 276 00:14:29,950 --> 00:14:31,310 Come out on the lawn, I'll show you a fight. 277 00:14:32,510 --> 00:14:36,630 Dad, I'm not going out on the lawn with you. I'm only kidding. I know you have a 278 00:14:36,630 --> 00:14:38,890 sense of humor. I've seen you try and play football. 279 00:14:40,150 --> 00:14:41,150 Listen to me, son. 280 00:14:41,770 --> 00:14:44,250 I realized something in that hospital bed. 281 00:14:45,680 --> 00:14:49,820 I have made a lot of unfair remarks about you being a candy ass. 282 00:14:51,320 --> 00:14:53,760 And I just want to say I'm sorry. 283 00:14:54,920 --> 00:14:55,920 Thank you. 284 00:14:56,100 --> 00:14:58,560 It's all my fault that you're a candy ass. 285 00:14:59,360 --> 00:15:05,120 What? I raised you soft, but I got to hand it to you. It took a lot of gut to 286 00:15:05,120 --> 00:15:08,500 come to that hospital and beg me to finally make a man out of you. 287 00:15:09,420 --> 00:15:12,220 Well, I just thank God we have the second chance. 288 00:15:13,690 --> 00:15:15,050 You promised me he was dying. 289 00:15:16,050 --> 00:15:17,370 He looked like he was. 290 00:15:17,630 --> 00:15:20,350 Well, you're supposed to know for sure. I count on your medical expertise. 291 00:15:21,130 --> 00:15:22,690 I'm a dental assistant. 292 00:15:22,950 --> 00:15:25,830 I make appointments and tell people to bite down on this. 293 00:15:26,790 --> 00:15:30,390 Well, bite down on this, because of you, I'm stuck going to the woods with a 294 00:15:30,390 --> 00:15:34,390 maniac armed with steel -tipped arrows, which are probably made out of his old 295 00:15:34,390 --> 00:15:35,390 co -workers. 296 00:15:36,880 --> 00:15:40,120 I just wanted you to have some sort of relationship with your father, but 297 00:15:40,120 --> 00:15:43,080 clearly that is not going to happen. So if you don't want to go on this trip, 298 00:15:43,120 --> 00:15:45,100 why don't you just tell him? I can't. 299 00:15:45,860 --> 00:15:49,520 I look him in the eye and he gives me that scary dad glare. 300 00:15:50,240 --> 00:15:53,480 Well, then fine. Be afraid of him for the rest of your life. But you know 301 00:15:53,560 --> 00:15:55,280 Bill? He's not that scary. 302 00:15:55,900 --> 00:15:59,980 Well, not to you, maybe. The girl with the angel eyes and the smile that can 303 00:15:59,980 --> 00:16:00,980 light up a room. 304 00:16:01,140 --> 00:16:04,820 He treats me differently to how he treats you. I just wish you'd understand 305 00:16:04,820 --> 00:16:07,000 that. Angel eyes? Really? 306 00:16:12,440 --> 00:16:13,640 Lantern. Check. 307 00:16:14,120 --> 00:16:15,580 Compass. Check. 308 00:16:15,940 --> 00:16:17,480 Latrine. What? 309 00:16:22,380 --> 00:16:24,320 Okay, we are off to the Math Olympics. 310 00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:25,740 Yeah, have fun on your trip, Dad. 311 00:16:25,980 --> 00:16:28,920 You want a bow and arrow in case one of them refs makes a bad call? 312 00:16:29,960 --> 00:16:31,640 No, I've got my weapon right here. 313 00:16:31,900 --> 00:16:32,900 Corpus callosum? 314 00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:35,360 Tell the left brain what the right brain is thinking. 315 00:16:35,920 --> 00:16:36,920 Oh, good luck, then. 316 00:16:39,020 --> 00:16:41,420 Oh, you guys are getting ready for the big trip? 317 00:16:42,240 --> 00:16:45,860 Bill, isn't there something you want to get out of your system that's been 318 00:16:45,860 --> 00:16:49,700 bothering you? You know, something that's been weighing you down for a long 319 00:16:49,700 --> 00:16:51,920 time? Don't worry, Judy, we got this. 320 00:16:54,380 --> 00:16:55,400 Oh, good luck, honey. 321 00:16:56,760 --> 00:17:00,620 Hey, I told you to turn off that stupid wrestling. 322 00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:04,660 This is research. That sleeper hold might come in handy if I don't kill the 323 00:17:04,660 --> 00:17:05,660 all the way. 324 00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:06,680 Okay, that's it. 325 00:17:06,980 --> 00:17:07,980 What are you doing? 326 00:17:08,740 --> 00:17:11,560 Exactly what I did with your baby blanket 40 years ago. 327 00:17:12,579 --> 00:17:13,740 Why would you do that? 328 00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:15,300 I'm doing you a favor. 329 00:17:15,839 --> 00:17:16,839 Listen, son. 330 00:17:16,940 --> 00:17:21,200 You have to learn how to live life instead of just watching it. And when 331 00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:25,200 back from this trip, you will be able to set a better example for that boy of 332 00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:26,520 yours. Make him more of a man. 333 00:17:26,780 --> 00:17:28,140 What's that supposed to mean? 334 00:17:28,460 --> 00:17:29,460 Math Olympics. 335 00:17:30,920 --> 00:17:33,740 Since when is math a sport, for God's sake? 336 00:17:34,890 --> 00:17:35,709 Ryan's fine. 337 00:17:35,710 --> 00:17:38,870 He doesn't need to change. And I'm not going to pull the same crap on him you 338 00:17:38,870 --> 00:17:39,869 pulled on me. 339 00:17:39,870 --> 00:17:40,890 What are you trying to say, Bill? 340 00:17:43,090 --> 00:17:49,750 I'm trying to say... I hated that bow hunting trip. 341 00:17:50,210 --> 00:17:52,430 I didn't want to go then. I don't want to go now. 342 00:17:53,590 --> 00:17:57,070 I only said all those nice things at the hospital because I thought you were 343 00:17:57,070 --> 00:17:58,070 dying. 344 00:17:59,490 --> 00:18:01,170 But I don't know why I bothered. 345 00:18:02,570 --> 00:18:03,870 You're never going to change. 346 00:18:05,520 --> 00:18:08,400 Oh, ha, ha, yeah, look who's dying again. 347 00:18:09,980 --> 00:18:11,920 It's not going to work this time, Dad. 348 00:18:12,300 --> 00:18:15,240 Oh, very funny, look who's turning blue. 349 00:18:16,040 --> 00:18:17,040 Oh, crap. 350 00:18:19,880 --> 00:18:24,500 Prove that the altitudes of a triangle are bisectors in the triangle formed by 351 00:18:24,500 --> 00:18:28,360 connecting the meeting points of the altitudes with the sides of the original 352 00:18:28,360 --> 00:18:29,360 triangle. 353 00:18:29,940 --> 00:18:31,180 What are you doing here? 354 00:18:31,580 --> 00:18:32,580 Hunting trips off. 355 00:18:33,260 --> 00:18:34,260 Where's your dad? 356 00:18:34,620 --> 00:18:36,160 In the hospital. So how's it going? 357 00:18:36,400 --> 00:18:37,900 In the hospital? What happened? 358 00:18:38,440 --> 00:18:40,940 I broke his rib. I'm licking him. So what did I mention? 359 00:18:42,620 --> 00:18:48,160 Bill! He'll be fine. He was choking on a peanut. The important thing is, I 360 00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:49,480 finally told him what I thought. 361 00:18:50,260 --> 00:18:52,100 So you finally got through to him, huh? 362 00:18:52,720 --> 00:18:57,020 He'll never change. But since I put him in the hospital, he's a little scared of 363 00:18:57,020 --> 00:18:58,020 me. 364 00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:03,840 But you came to see Brian. Yeah, well, I decided I should work on a relationship 365 00:19:03,840 --> 00:19:05,520 I can actually do something about. 366 00:19:05,880 --> 00:19:06,880 Question 33. 367 00:19:07,540 --> 00:19:08,540 Mathletes on your mark. 368 00:19:09,900 --> 00:19:14,260 Let A, B, C, and D be integers of decreasing value greater than zero. 369 00:19:14,840 --> 00:19:21,220 Suppose that A times C plus B times D equals the product of B plus D plus A 370 00:19:21,220 --> 00:19:25,800 minus C times B plus D minus A plus C. 371 00:19:26,360 --> 00:19:32,560 Prove that A times B plus C times D is not... Is she dumb? 372 00:19:32,780 --> 00:19:33,780 I think so. 373 00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:35,000 Go, Brian! 374 00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:39,040 That's my boy. 375 00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:40,480 Isn't that your dad? 376 00:19:41,840 --> 00:19:42,840 No. 377 00:19:47,530 --> 00:19:52,670 There never was a story of more woe than this of Juliet and her Romeo. 378 00:19:53,310 --> 00:19:55,370 You know, Al, your son is a nice boy. 379 00:19:56,750 --> 00:19:58,370 But he can't write worth crap. 30353

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