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1
00:00:01,290 --> 00:00:02,790
Isn't this a great movie?
2
00:00:03,310 --> 00:00:07,250
Yeah. It'd be so cool if we had a mad
scientist in our neighborhood that could
3
00:00:07,250 --> 00:00:08,270
take us back in time.
4
00:00:08,670 --> 00:00:11,790
Well, we do have a neighbor who grows
stuff in his basement that he says will
5
00:00:11,790 --> 00:00:12,790
take you back in time.
6
00:00:13,570 --> 00:00:15,130
By the way, stay away from him.
7
00:00:16,270 --> 00:00:18,690
Guys, it's really late. It's time for
everyone to be getting to bed.
8
00:00:18,970 --> 00:00:22,410
Mom, it's a Friday night. Why can't we
stay up? Because you have dance class
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00:00:22,410 --> 00:00:24,870
tomorrow, Brian has karate, and you both
will be exhausted.
10
00:00:25,510 --> 00:00:26,510
What does that mean?
11
00:00:26,940 --> 00:00:30,680
Oh, sweetie, remember the last time you
stayed up? You kept bumping into stuff
12
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the next day?
13
00:00:32,220 --> 00:00:33,220
Oh, yeah.
14
00:00:34,420 --> 00:00:38,000
Come on, Judy. The kids are really
enjoying the movie. Let us stay up a
15
00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:39,500
later. All right, fine.
16
00:00:39,900 --> 00:00:42,840
But make sure they brush their teeth and
put on their pajamas by the next
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00:00:42,840 --> 00:00:46,780
commercial. No problem. Okay, good
night, guys. Good night. Oh, no falling
18
00:00:46,780 --> 00:00:48,240
asleep on the couch, you hear me?
19
00:00:48,460 --> 00:00:49,460
Gotcha.
20
00:00:50,260 --> 00:00:51,700
Whatever, warden.
21
00:00:54,160 --> 00:00:57,620
Now, you kids better listen, because if
the inmates get out of hand, the warden
22
00:00:57,620 --> 00:00:58,620
can get pretty ugly.
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00:00:59,360 --> 00:01:00,500
Dad, she's right behind you.
24
00:01:03,080 --> 00:01:06,740
Oh, my
25
00:01:06,740 --> 00:01:13,000
God.
26
00:01:15,260 --> 00:01:18,520
Tina, it's three in the morning. Have
you been up this whole time?
27
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Yeah. What are you watching?
28
00:01:22,730 --> 00:01:25,430
How long has that big animal been eating
that small animal?
29
00:01:25,810 --> 00:01:26,810
A while.
30
00:01:28,130 --> 00:01:30,010
It's time to turn it off, honey.
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I mean, I have a better idea.
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Bill,
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wake up. Oh, it can't be morning yet.
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It is morning, 3 .30 in the morning, and
I just put the kids to bed thanks to
35
00:01:56,130 --> 00:01:59,210
you. Oh, don't thank me, Judy. Thank
you.
36
00:02:00,450 --> 00:02:01,930
You're not going to sleep yet.
37
00:02:02,590 --> 00:02:05,170
Okay, but you're on your own with this.
38
00:02:12,410 --> 00:02:13,970
No, I want to talk.
39
00:02:14,830 --> 00:02:15,830
Okay.
40
00:02:16,890 --> 00:02:18,370
You're so hot.
41
00:02:23,310 --> 00:02:25,330
of talk about the kids.
42
00:02:25,770 --> 00:02:29,570
I asked you to get them to bed and you
just let them do what they wanted. I'm
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00:02:29,570 --> 00:02:30,990
sorry. It won't happen again.
44
00:02:31,330 --> 00:02:32,410
Yes, it will.
45
00:02:32,610 --> 00:02:33,610
I know.
46
00:02:35,150 --> 00:02:38,650
I just want you to know there's a
perfectly good reason for what happened.
47
00:02:38,990 --> 00:02:39,990
Oh, yeah? What is it?
48
00:02:43,430 --> 00:02:44,430
Bill!
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00:02:45,130 --> 00:02:49,170
I'm just really sick of always being the
bad cop while you get to be the good
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00:02:49,170 --> 00:02:51,950
cop. You don't always have to be the bad
cop.
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00:02:52,270 --> 00:02:53,270
Like tonight.
52
00:02:53,550 --> 00:02:56,590
What's the worst that could have
happened? The kids wake up in the living
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00:02:56,590 --> 00:02:57,670
on Saturday morning.
54
00:02:58,390 --> 00:03:02,070
On the bright side, Judy, if they start
to like it, we can rent out their rooms.
55
00:03:02,790 --> 00:03:06,330
Oh, so I should be more fun like you.
Great, why don't I wake them up and take
56
00:03:06,330 --> 00:03:07,330
them to a rave?
57
00:03:07,490 --> 00:03:09,870
Why, there's plenty of raving here.
What?
58
00:03:10,710 --> 00:03:11,710
Nothing.
59
00:03:12,270 --> 00:03:14,570
All right, you know what? We'll talk
about this in the morning.
60
00:03:15,530 --> 00:03:17,090
Oh, goody. What'd you say?
61
00:03:17,330 --> 00:03:18,330
Nothing.
62
00:03:19,410 --> 00:03:20,410
Jackass.
63
00:03:22,640 --> 00:03:24,720
What did you say? I called you a
jackass.
64
00:03:26,100 --> 00:03:27,100
Oh, okay.
65
00:03:32,420 --> 00:03:35,080
Hey, hey, hey, hey. What are you kids
doing?
66
00:03:35,320 --> 00:03:37,180
This is dangerous. Something's going to
get broken.
67
00:03:37,500 --> 00:03:40,360
Your mother and I have told you a
thousand times not to play hockey in the
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00:03:40,360 --> 00:03:41,780
living room. She's not here, Dad.
69
00:03:42,020 --> 00:03:43,900
In that case, Tina and I are the
Blackhawks.
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00:03:44,440 --> 00:03:47,060
Hey, hey, hey. Bill is on the ice. He
has a vendetta.
71
00:03:49,940 --> 00:03:51,100
Hi, honey.
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00:03:53,900 --> 00:03:55,080
Playing a game of beach ball hockey?
73
00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:56,400
No.
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00:03:56,560 --> 00:03:57,760
I'm the goalie.
75
00:03:59,580 --> 00:04:00,580
Yeah.
76
00:04:01,220 --> 00:04:04,240
Sorry. Don't worry about it. Looks like
you're having fun. I got pizza.
77
00:04:04,880 --> 00:04:07,220
I thought we were only allowed to have
pizza once a week.
78
00:04:07,440 --> 00:04:11,000
I made a little change to that rule.
From now on, we can have pizza whenever
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00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:13,920
want. Wherever we want. Let's eat it in
front of the TV.
80
00:04:14,700 --> 00:04:18,120
Then, maybe later, we'll clear out the
furniture and have a touch football
81
00:04:18,880 --> 00:04:19,940
Mom, what's going on?
82
00:04:20,300 --> 00:04:23,800
My father and I had a little discussion
last night, and he's convinced me it'll
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00:04:23,800 --> 00:04:27,340
be more fun. So that's what I'm gonna
do. Come on, pizza's getting cold.
84
00:04:27,640 --> 00:04:30,600
Okay, kids, get some plates. We don't
want to get sauce all over the couch.
85
00:04:30,900 --> 00:04:33,800
Oh, Bill, what's your problem? You got a
tea party planned?
86
00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:35,040
Geez, lighten up.
87
00:04:37,760 --> 00:04:40,600
Wow, sausage, onion, and bacon.
88
00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:45,140
I thought we weren't allowed to have
this kind of pizza since Dad's 90 of 1
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00:04:45,140 --> 00:04:49,500
trombones. Aw, that's what windows are
for. Come on, kids, dig in.
90
00:04:53,030 --> 00:04:54,570
Tina. Yeah?
91
00:04:55,870 --> 00:04:57,010
What are you doing?
92
00:04:57,550 --> 00:04:58,550
Nothing.
93
00:05:00,930 --> 00:05:02,350
She's been eating ice cream.
94
00:05:02,690 --> 00:05:03,930
No, I haven't.
95
00:05:04,870 --> 00:05:05,910
Can we have some?
96
00:05:06,190 --> 00:05:09,610
Yeah, can we? You can't have ice cream
until after dinner.
97
00:05:09,930 --> 00:05:13,370
Unless it's in a delicious root beer
float, then it's just a beverage.
98
00:05:15,510 --> 00:05:18,330
Judy, all that sugar's gonna make him
crazy.
99
00:05:18,890 --> 00:05:19,890
You're right.
100
00:05:20,130 --> 00:05:21,930
I'm gonna eat my pizza in the bathtub.
101
00:05:22,560 --> 00:05:25,040
Are you leaving me alone with them and
taking a bath?
102
00:05:25,320 --> 00:05:26,540
Get out of my way.
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00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:28,980
You get out of my way. Make me. Ow.
104
00:05:29,320 --> 00:05:33,000
Brian, I wouldn't take that from her.
Good luck. The first aid kit's under the
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sink.
106
00:05:34,240 --> 00:05:36,320
Ow. No pinching. No pinching.
107
00:05:37,160 --> 00:05:38,460
Morning, honey. What you doing?
108
00:05:39,160 --> 00:05:41,900
I'm just cleaning up the stains from
last night's dinner.
109
00:05:42,600 --> 00:05:45,140
After you went upstairs, all hell broke
loose.
110
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Tina ate too much ice cream and started
jumping up and down on the couch.
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00:05:49,870 --> 00:05:55,090
which set off Brian's motion sickness,
which made Lauren laugh so hard she shot
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root beer float through her nose.
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00:05:57,550 --> 00:05:59,590
Wow, I can't believe I slipped through
all that.
114
00:06:00,530 --> 00:06:04,350
Yeah, well, I see what you're doing, and
I just want you to know I've learned my
115
00:06:04,350 --> 00:06:08,850
lesson. You're sick of always being the
bad cop, and I only make your job harder
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00:06:08,850 --> 00:06:10,210
when I undermine your authority.
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I get it.
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00:06:12,430 --> 00:06:16,290
Now, everybody back to normal on three.
One, two... Hang on.
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00:06:17,850 --> 00:06:19,250
Bill, I have to ask you something.
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00:06:19,760 --> 00:06:21,240
Have the kids had breakfast? Yeah.
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And they're all right?
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00:06:22,820 --> 00:06:24,920
Yeah. And the house was clean?
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00:06:25,540 --> 00:06:27,220
Well, it's not sticky anymore.
124
00:06:28,380 --> 00:06:29,380
Huh.
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00:06:29,660 --> 00:06:30,880
What do you mean, huh?
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I gotta be honest.
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00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:36,220
I did think all hell would break loose,
but I thought you wouldn't know what to
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00:06:36,220 --> 00:06:38,800
do and you'd panic and come running to
me, but you didn't.
129
00:06:39,100 --> 00:06:40,880
It was pretty rough, but I got through
it.
130
00:06:41,220 --> 00:06:43,240
Exactly. You can do this.
131
00:06:44,840 --> 00:06:46,720
What are you saying, Judy?
132
00:06:47,100 --> 00:06:52,160
I'm saying that last night I read two
chapters of my book in the bathtub. The
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00:06:52,160 --> 00:06:57,660
bathtub. And then I got nine hours of
sleep.
134
00:06:58,560 --> 00:07:02,200
Bill, it was like being on vacation. No,
no, it was better. It was like being
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00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:03,340
alone on vacation.
136
00:07:04,720 --> 00:07:06,960
And three. Now everybody's back to
normal.
137
00:07:07,640 --> 00:07:09,640
No, no, I can be good, cop.
138
00:07:09,860 --> 00:07:12,880
You pick up the slack. The kids are fun.
Just be a...
139
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Not fine.
140
00:07:16,730 --> 00:07:19,250
Brian got practically died.
141
00:07:21,290 --> 00:07:24,830
Good luck with that stain. A little club
soda ought to do the trick.
142
00:07:25,210 --> 00:07:29,590
Judy, you can't change the natural order
of the universe. Hey, kids, who's up
143
00:07:29,590 --> 00:07:31,090
for a game of baseball hockey?
144
00:07:31,610 --> 00:07:34,590
No, no, no, no. I just vacuumed in
there.
145
00:07:37,370 --> 00:07:40,250
It's your turn to set the table. No,
it's not.
146
00:07:40,780 --> 00:07:41,800
I emptied the dishwasher.
147
00:07:42,280 --> 00:07:45,920
I emptied the dishwasher. Now set the
table. You do it. Okay, enough.
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00:07:46,140 --> 00:07:50,060
This happens every night. You argue for
15 minutes over something that takes 10
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00:07:50,060 --> 00:07:51,060
seconds to do.
150
00:07:51,260 --> 00:07:53,180
Your mother's sick of it. Isn't that
right, Judy?
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00:07:53,500 --> 00:07:54,500
Huh?
152
00:07:55,240 --> 00:07:56,620
You're sick of this, right?
153
00:07:57,160 --> 00:08:00,560
Oh, I wasn't really listening. I was
just thinking how this bell pepper sort
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00:08:00,560 --> 00:08:01,560
looks like Jay Leno.
155
00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:08,580
Man, I hope you two are happy. You've
gotten your mother really angry.
156
00:08:11,820 --> 00:08:16,700
She doesn't seem angry. That's when
she's at her scariest. She's so angry,
157
00:08:16,700 --> 00:08:17,700
smiling.
158
00:08:18,500 --> 00:08:22,220
You know what? If we put all this food
in tortillas, we don't need plates.
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00:08:22,520 --> 00:08:24,920
Oh, my God. Now she's threatening more
fun. What are we going to do?
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00:08:25,380 --> 00:08:26,800
Oh, Brian, I'm scared.
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00:08:27,020 --> 00:08:29,960
Just shut up and set the table.
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00:08:30,260 --> 00:08:34,000
Whatever. You don't have to yell. I'm
not yelling. I'm emphasizing.
163
00:08:34,880 --> 00:08:37,220
Daddy, can I have cereal for dinner?
164
00:08:37,580 --> 00:08:38,580
Ask your mother.
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00:08:38,860 --> 00:08:40,340
It's fine with me if it's fine with your
father.
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00:08:40,580 --> 00:08:41,580
What?
167
00:08:44,410 --> 00:08:45,410
No, honey.
168
00:08:45,450 --> 00:08:46,450
Why not?
169
00:08:46,830 --> 00:08:51,270
Because, honey, cereal's for breakfast.
You eat it for dinner, your body will
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00:08:51,270 --> 00:08:56,190
think it's morning, you won't be able to
get to sleep, and monsters will come.
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00:08:56,730 --> 00:08:58,790
I don't care. I want cereal.
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00:08:59,410 --> 00:09:01,190
Well, you can't have it. Why?
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00:09:01,990 --> 00:09:05,610
Because I'm the father in this house,
and what I say goes.
174
00:09:05,870 --> 00:09:06,870
You're mean.
175
00:09:08,070 --> 00:09:10,290
Okay, that's it. Could you go upstairs
and leave us alone?
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00:09:10,620 --> 00:09:14,340
Oh, I can't go upstairs. Count Chalk and
I might be hiding under my bed. Just
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00:09:14,340 --> 00:09:15,340
go.
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00:09:17,560 --> 00:09:18,560
It's over, Judy.
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00:09:18,740 --> 00:09:19,619
What's over?
180
00:09:19,620 --> 00:09:23,920
Did you hear what I said to Tina? I
sounded just like my father, and I
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00:09:23,920 --> 00:09:25,600
sound just like my father.
182
00:09:25,980 --> 00:09:28,660
Oh, but I love Mike. Will you turn that
crap down?
183
00:09:29,760 --> 00:09:31,060
No, I just did it again.
184
00:09:32,120 --> 00:09:34,360
That's it, that's it. I'm done being bad
cop.
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00:09:34,660 --> 00:09:37,760
Oh, so I'm supposed to swoop back in and
start yelling? No, thanks.
186
00:09:38,480 --> 00:09:41,240
I've had a taste of being a good cop,
and I like it. I like it a lot.
187
00:09:41,800 --> 00:09:45,600
Well, that may be, but your plan has one
fatal flaw.
188
00:09:46,440 --> 00:09:50,740
You can only be good cop as long as I'm
willing to be bad cop. The minute I
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00:09:50,740 --> 00:09:53,520
quit, we're back to square one. So guess
what?
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00:09:53,800 --> 00:09:54,699
I quit.
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00:09:54,700 --> 00:09:56,320
You can't quit. Yes, I can.
192
00:09:56,540 --> 00:09:59,240
You know what that means, Judy? There
are two good cops in town.
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00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:00,800
Two good cops?
194
00:10:01,720 --> 00:10:02,940
Well, this should be fun.
195
00:10:03,500 --> 00:10:07,780
Ah, yeah, that sounds like fun now. But
by tomorrow, those kids will be running
196
00:10:07,780 --> 00:10:09,880
around like monkeys in a donut shop.
197
00:10:10,920 --> 00:10:12,560
Or you in a donut shop.
198
00:10:13,400 --> 00:10:17,360
Exactly. When that happens, which one of
us do you think is going to blink
199
00:10:17,360 --> 00:10:20,380
first? I guess we'll just have to wait
and see. Come on, Judy.
200
00:10:20,600 --> 00:10:22,280
You've been good cop for a day and a
half.
201
00:10:22,480 --> 00:10:24,360
I've been on the force my entire life.
202
00:10:24,980 --> 00:10:25,980
Oh, yeah?
203
00:10:26,060 --> 00:10:28,460
Hey, Tina, you can have cereal for
dinner.
204
00:10:29,460 --> 00:10:31,420
Hey, Tina, would you rather have cake?
205
00:10:31,680 --> 00:10:32,700
I'll see you in hell.
206
00:10:37,130 --> 00:10:37,989
Yeah, Linda.
207
00:10:37,990 --> 00:10:38,969
Hey.
208
00:10:38,970 --> 00:10:39,970
What are you doing?
209
00:10:40,210 --> 00:10:41,450
Making myself a sandwich.
210
00:10:42,270 --> 00:10:43,270
What one?
211
00:10:43,950 --> 00:10:46,910
Ice cream and chocolate chip cookies.
Aren't you going to ruin your dinner?
212
00:10:47,170 --> 00:10:48,610
Not if I don't eat dinner until
midnight.
213
00:10:49,070 --> 00:10:50,070
Isn't that faster bedtime?
214
00:10:50,390 --> 00:10:52,230
You know, we don't really have bedtimes
anymore.
215
00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:05,060
are running amok. I have no problem with
that, Judy.
216
00:11:05,640 --> 00:11:08,380
Fine with me. This place looks like it
was hit by a tornado.
217
00:11:08,860 --> 00:11:09,860
Brett, what are you doing?
218
00:11:10,080 --> 00:11:11,720
Mom and Dad, let me take the VTR apart.
219
00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:13,580
I wanted to see if I could put it back
together.
220
00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:14,840
Can you?
221
00:11:14,860 --> 00:11:16,260
Yeah. What's that part?
222
00:11:17,080 --> 00:11:18,080
Well, then, no.
223
00:11:19,760 --> 00:11:20,760
Hey.
224
00:11:21,320 --> 00:11:22,900
What's going on here?
225
00:11:24,140 --> 00:11:25,680
And, uh, do you have any left?
226
00:11:26,640 --> 00:11:29,940
What's going on? We've just decided to
let our children do whatever they want.
227
00:11:32,560 --> 00:11:36,040
No one has to eat it if they don't want
to. Damn it, I was going to say that.
228
00:11:36,380 --> 00:11:38,200
Yeah, but you didn't, did you?
229
00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:44,280
Okay, I see what's going on here. And I
think it's really selfish of the both of
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00:11:44,280 --> 00:11:45,280
you.
231
00:11:46,100 --> 00:11:49,560
Now, I told you I was bringing over the
pictures of my cats that I took from my
232
00:11:49,560 --> 00:11:50,560
photography class.
233
00:11:50,820 --> 00:11:53,720
And this is just your way of getting rid
of me so you don't have to look at
234
00:11:53,720 --> 00:11:54,559
them.
235
00:11:54,560 --> 00:11:57,840
You got us guilty as charged.
236
00:11:58,480 --> 00:11:59,480
That's it, I'm leaving.
237
00:12:01,610 --> 00:12:04,410
I'm walking through the door.
238
00:12:06,090 --> 00:12:07,890
I'm opening the door.
239
00:12:09,730 --> 00:12:12,450
I'm closing the door.
240
00:12:14,010 --> 00:12:16,710
I'm walking down the stairs.
241
00:12:20,410 --> 00:12:21,490
I'm okay.
242
00:12:23,910 --> 00:12:25,050
Hey, Lord.
243
00:12:25,730 --> 00:12:27,210
Kiddo. Hey.
244
00:12:27,830 --> 00:12:30,150
How was that ice cream sandwich I let
you have?
245
00:12:32,080 --> 00:12:33,360
though. I think I gotta skip dinner.
246
00:12:33,600 --> 00:12:34,600
Oh, hey, that's cool.
247
00:12:34,620 --> 00:12:36,080
Who says cool anymore?
248
00:12:36,620 --> 00:12:37,660
Kids still say cool.
249
00:12:37,880 --> 00:12:38,880
Oh, cool.
250
00:12:39,020 --> 00:12:40,020
Right on.
251
00:12:40,080 --> 00:12:42,140
Listen, Mom, Dad.
252
00:12:42,680 --> 00:12:44,160
Bill and Judy.
253
00:12:45,280 --> 00:12:46,520
Bill and Judy.
254
00:12:47,920 --> 00:12:51,040
Well, you know how I've been begging you
guys to let me get a belly button ring?
255
00:12:51,460 --> 00:12:52,460
Yeah.
256
00:12:52,860 --> 00:12:56,560
Well, since you guys have been so cool
lately, I thought maybe I could get one.
257
00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:00,400
So can I, Bill? Can I, Judy?
258
00:13:03,320 --> 00:13:05,480
You guys aren't cool with this. I get
it.
259
00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:10,080
No, no, no, no, no. It's cool with me.
All kinds of cool.
260
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:13,660
You just got to ask your mother.
261
00:13:15,100 --> 00:13:16,100
Mom?
262
00:13:19,140 --> 00:13:20,140
No.
263
00:13:20,940 --> 00:13:22,100
I knew it.
264
00:13:22,460 --> 00:13:25,540
I mean, no, you don't have to ask me. If
your father says yes, then the answer
265
00:13:25,540 --> 00:13:26,039
is yes.
266
00:13:26,040 --> 00:13:28,900
Oh, my God, I can't believe it. Oh, you
are the...
267
00:13:30,730 --> 00:13:32,790
Don't mention it. Can you take me
tomorrow?
268
00:13:33,550 --> 00:13:34,550
Take you tomorrow?
269
00:13:35,070 --> 00:13:40,050
Yeah, since I'm only 13, I have to have
a parent accompany me. So, can you, Dad?
270
00:13:40,610 --> 00:13:42,370
I mean, Bill?
271
00:13:46,910 --> 00:13:47,910
Oh, yeah, sure.
272
00:13:48,110 --> 00:13:49,490
Oh, thank you so much.
273
00:13:49,770 --> 00:13:50,770
You're the best.
274
00:13:53,270 --> 00:13:57,570
Well, looks like I'm taking my little
girl to get her belly button pierced.
275
00:13:57,890 --> 00:13:58,890
Sure does.
276
00:14:00,010 --> 00:14:01,330
So, you getting ready to blink?
277
00:14:01,590 --> 00:14:02,730
Not even close.
278
00:14:03,110 --> 00:14:04,110
Really? Me neither.
279
00:14:04,550 --> 00:14:05,550
See these eyes?
280
00:14:06,350 --> 00:14:07,430
Wide open, baby.
281
00:14:07,790 --> 00:14:08,790
Oh, yeah? Yeah.
282
00:14:11,970 --> 00:14:15,370
How was karate?
283
00:14:16,030 --> 00:14:17,510
I broke a board with my head.
284
00:14:17,790 --> 00:14:18,790
Really?
285
00:14:19,150 --> 00:14:23,310
Well, actually, I lost my balance trying
to kick and fell into a wall, but a
286
00:14:23,310 --> 00:14:24,310
board did break.
287
00:14:24,730 --> 00:14:26,030
Good for you, honey.
288
00:14:26,590 --> 00:14:29,050
So, Lauren's getting her belly button
pierced, huh?
289
00:14:29,450 --> 00:14:30,450
We're cool with it, okay?
290
00:14:30,590 --> 00:14:32,070
We're cool parents, got it? Okay.
291
00:14:33,510 --> 00:14:34,750
You know, Mom, you are cool.
292
00:14:36,110 --> 00:14:37,670
Can I drive the car?
293
00:14:38,510 --> 00:14:39,930
What? Just for a little bit.
294
00:14:40,190 --> 00:14:41,190
You're 14.
295
00:14:41,410 --> 00:14:44,610
Randy Moscott's only 14. He gets to
drive a car all the time.
296
00:14:45,070 --> 00:14:47,030
You don't have a friend named Randy
Moscott.
297
00:14:47,230 --> 00:14:51,510
I know, but, Mom, there's no snow on the
ground, and I promise I'll be careful.
298
00:14:51,730 --> 00:14:52,850
I said no.
299
00:14:53,600 --> 00:14:56,300
Just around this parking lot over there.
It's totally empty.
300
00:14:56,520 --> 00:14:58,480
Brian, I'm sorry you can't drive.
301
00:14:59,980 --> 00:15:00,980
Fine.
302
00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:03,580
I bet Dad would let me. What'd you say?
303
00:15:04,300 --> 00:15:05,300
Dad.
304
00:15:05,620 --> 00:15:06,660
He'd let me drive.
305
00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:09,460
Then again, he's the fun one.
306
00:15:11,940 --> 00:15:13,220
He is, is he?
307
00:15:13,500 --> 00:15:14,500
What are you doing?
308
00:15:14,820 --> 00:15:15,820
Switch places.
309
00:15:16,140 --> 00:15:17,360
You mean it? Yep.
310
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:19,880
My God, I can't believe this is
happening.
311
00:15:25,300 --> 00:15:30,680
Okay. The important thing is to keep
your hands on the wheel at all times.
312
00:15:30,880 --> 00:15:32,000
Ten and two.
313
00:15:33,260 --> 00:15:36,600
Really? Because Dad's hands are usually
at noon and his nose.
314
00:15:37,760 --> 00:15:39,860
Well, I'm going to teach you the right
way.
315
00:15:41,620 --> 00:15:42,620
Okay.
316
00:15:42,860 --> 00:15:48,060
Grab that handle there and very slowly
put it into drive.
317
00:15:48,460 --> 00:15:50,620
Slowly. Yes, ma 'am.
318
00:15:52,240 --> 00:15:55,120
You want to be on the break when you do
that, Brian. Which one's the break? The
319
00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:56,260
one on your left. Which one's that?
320
00:15:56,680 --> 00:15:57,680
Not that one.
321
00:16:01,360 --> 00:16:02,360
Wow.
322
00:16:03,400 --> 00:16:04,900
I keep seeing that squirrel.
323
00:16:07,820 --> 00:16:08,820
Me too.
324
00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:10,440
And then those bushes.
325
00:16:10,980 --> 00:16:11,980
Me too.
326
00:16:12,200 --> 00:16:13,260
And then that dumpster.
327
00:16:13,700 --> 00:16:16,200
Mommy needs to see next a beer.
328
00:16:17,960 --> 00:16:20,440
When you get to the kitchen, the fridge
is on your left.
329
00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:22,400
Hey. Judy.
330
00:16:22,820 --> 00:16:24,180
Oh, Bill, sit down.
331
00:16:24,420 --> 00:16:25,420
What's going on?
332
00:16:27,440 --> 00:16:30,580
Well, Brian asked me if he could drive
the car.
333
00:16:31,360 --> 00:16:34,860
And let's just say I'm not playing this
good cop, bad cop game anymore.
334
00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:36,740
Because you wouldn't let him, huh?
335
00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:42,420
You blinked. No, actually, I didn't. I
let him drive, and when we hit the
336
00:16:42,420 --> 00:16:43,920
dumpster, we all blinked.
337
00:16:46,060 --> 00:16:49,060
Except the squirrel he ran over. He'll
never blink again.
338
00:16:50,800 --> 00:16:52,060
You let him drive?
339
00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:56,640
I know it was stupid, but he asked, and
I didn't want to be a bad cop. I know he
340
00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:58,340
asked, but you weren't supposed to let
him.
341
00:16:58,840 --> 00:16:59,940
Wait a minute. What?
342
00:17:01,040 --> 00:17:02,040
Nothing.
343
00:17:02,820 --> 00:17:07,540
Oh, my God. You put him up to it. No, I
didn't. Brian, did your father put you
344
00:17:07,540 --> 00:17:08,540
up to it? Yes.
345
00:17:08,900 --> 00:17:10,339
Oh, wow.
346
00:17:10,780 --> 00:17:14,760
I don't believe you. You were supposed
to say no. You were supposed to blink.
347
00:17:15,020 --> 00:17:17,319
I did say no, but he kept asking.
348
00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:21,160
What? You were supposed to stop asking
once she said no.
349
00:17:21,420 --> 00:17:23,700
I know, but I really wanted to drive.
350
00:17:24,940 --> 00:17:27,300
I'm just a kid. My judgment's not very
good.
351
00:17:28,920 --> 00:17:31,300
It's okay, honey. No, it's not.
352
00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:33,980
This house is out of control. We need
boundaries.
353
00:17:34,920 --> 00:17:35,920
Look at this.
354
00:17:38,860 --> 00:17:40,000
Tina, you're all sticky.
355
00:17:41,180 --> 00:17:42,180
Come on.
356
00:17:43,080 --> 00:17:45,660
I'm going to get you a bath and a hot
meal.
357
00:17:47,140 --> 00:17:48,240
Thank you, Brian.
358
00:17:51,129 --> 00:17:55,770
I can't believe you made him ask me to
drive. I can't believe you let him
359
00:17:56,010 --> 00:17:57,250
I guess we're both idiots.
360
00:17:57,630 --> 00:17:59,310
Oh, my God. Lauren's belly button ring.
361
00:17:59,570 --> 00:18:01,730
Don't worry. She didn't go through with
it.
362
00:18:02,090 --> 00:18:07,010
We went into the place, and this big
pierced guy came in with a huge needle.
363
00:18:07,690 --> 00:18:10,630
She got scared and asked Daddy to take
her home.
364
00:18:10,870 --> 00:18:15,110
You blinked, didn't you? Of course I
did. She was checking out tattoos. She
365
00:18:15,110 --> 00:18:16,110
never going to blink.
366
00:18:18,330 --> 00:18:20,810
I'm just glad one of us used good
judgment today.
367
00:18:21,010 --> 00:18:24,970
So I guess this means the days of two
good cops are over.
368
00:18:25,210 --> 00:18:26,210
Oh, yeah.
369
00:18:26,750 --> 00:18:28,850
I sure will miss reading in the tub.
370
00:18:29,330 --> 00:18:32,170
I can be bad cop every once in a while.
371
00:18:33,050 --> 00:18:34,790
I'm not going to lie to you, Judy.
372
00:18:35,550 --> 00:18:37,430
It's nice pushing small people around.
373
00:18:39,810 --> 00:18:41,510
Thanks, Bill. Yeah, don't mention it.
374
00:18:41,810 --> 00:18:44,190
Lauren, get off the phone and start your
homework.
375
00:18:45,910 --> 00:18:48,670
Although... Brian can be bad cop till
the kids go to bed.
376
00:18:49,690 --> 00:18:51,990
Then I'll be bad cop for the rest of the
night.
377
00:18:52,310 --> 00:18:58,190
Well, we won't need a bad cop once the
kids go to... Oh.
378
00:19:00,330 --> 00:19:06,130
Officer, I'm a bad, bad girl driving
down a deserted country lane.
379
00:19:08,830 --> 00:19:09,830
Hey,
380
00:19:10,790 --> 00:19:12,150
Brian, you're a quick thinker, right?
381
00:19:12,590 --> 00:19:14,770
Yeah, you know, actually, some of my
teachers... Think quick!
382
00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:21,040
Very funny, Dad, although I don't think
Mom would find it very funny.
383
00:19:21,280 --> 00:19:22,740
I don't care what your mother thinks.
384
00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:24,500
Dad, she's right behind you.
385
00:19:24,780 --> 00:19:28,260
Oh, isn't it funny how your mother's
always right behind you?
386
00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:32,780
I'll tell you one thing. If she is, she
can kiss my butt.
387
00:19:33,720 --> 00:19:36,000
Come on, lay one on there, Judy.
388
00:19:36,660 --> 00:19:37,660
Come on.
389
00:19:38,600 --> 00:19:39,840
Right cheek or left?
390
00:19:41,600 --> 00:19:42,780
Nice try, Lauren.
391
00:19:44,460 --> 00:19:45,460
What, Dad?
392
00:19:48,940 --> 00:19:50,220
Bill, are you going to turn around?
393
00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:52,520
That depends.
394
00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:55,460
Don't you want a little more of this?
395
00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:16,760
I wouldn't have it any other way Cause
you make me happy
30429
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