All language subtitles for And.Just.Like.That.S03E07.They.Wanna.Have.Fun.1080p.MAX.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.x264-NTb

-I hate you.
-Understood.

But I might need a bit more
explanation as to exactly why.

Your first chapter is thrilling.

It's polished and
it's ready to publish,

and how am I supposed to hand
you my work in progress now?

Well, that was the
deal that we agreed to.

But can we get back to the,
"My work is thrilling" bit?

Oh, my God, Duncan,
it is so good.

I'm so relieved.

Alright, this is mine.

And I'm so terrified.

Lily, what's wrong?

Diego...

broke up with me.

-Mm.
-Ooh!

Alison, almond milk macchiato.

Poor Lily. Mm.

Breakups at that age
are so Bronte sisters.

You know, I still feel
a little of the pain

of my first high school breakup.

Well, it was only a few
years ago. Give it some time.

Kevin Moss. Mm.

Yeah, he said he was into me,
but it was just way too much.

Mm.

Guys, that may be my brand.

That flower market
can kiss my ass.

It took so friggin' long,
I'll barely have enough time

to slap on a light coat of
bronzer before she arrives.

Before who arrives?

Giuseppe's shrink mother is
coming from Rome for a week.

And I am not a fan of therapy.

I tried it once. He
had all these insights.

-Ugh.
-Like I need that.

Tidy up!

My future mother-in-law's on
her way over from the Carlyle.

So, at this point, I don't even know
how I'm gonna get Lily out of bed.

And with everything else
that I have on my plate,

it's the last thing I
need, is for my easy one

to just have a breakdown.

Why? What else do you
have on your plate?

Oh, my gosh, I wanted to
show you this new ring.

Ah, questo caffè è così dolce,

piccolo e intimo.

È il pane

-ha un profumo invivante.
-Si, si.

When did you get this?
I've never seen this one.

-Oh, bene, look who's here!
-Hey!

Mama, I want you
to meet my friends.

-Oh!
-Carrie, Charlotte, Miranda,

this is my mother,
Dottoressa Gianna Amato.

Please, angel, why so formal?

We are all friends.
Ladies, call me Gia.

Oh, it's so nice to meet you,
Gia. And your English is perfect.

It should be. I was
born in Buffalo.

Made my escape at 19 to
study painting in Florence.

I was going to be
the next Botticelli.

The arrogance of a
19-year-old American, yes?

But I fell in love, so
here is my masterpiece.

Aw!

-We love your son.
-Then, I love all of you.

This gorgeous man must be the
Anthony I have heard so much about.

Ciao bello, I'm Gia.

Ciao.

Mama, this is not Anthony.

I hope his fancy, important,

head-shrinker mama enjoys
this fucking foliage.

-This is Anthony.
-Oh.

I didn't know you were here.

Ciao.

I wanted to make the place
look its best for you.

I appreciate the effort.
Now, please, set that down.

It must be heavy for
a man of your size.

Take it. Take it.
I said take it.

So, welcome.

What should I call
you? Mrs. Amato?

Gianna? Mrs. Gianna? Mom? Mama?

You may call me
Dottoressa Gianna Amato.

I'm afraid I made a very
bad first impression.

You have some makeup
on your neck, yes?

Yes.

Hey, I think we should
throw Charlotte a party

for her birthday next week.

Okay! Let's do it
at my new place!

I've been wanting to have a
little housewarming there anyway.

Well, actually, I think it
should be a kind of bigger party.

And I have all that space, plus
you're working all next week,

-so, you know, just let me plan it.
-Okay.

Well, it doesn't have to
be a big thing, though.

-It's not her 60th.
-No, I know.

I know, I know, I
just feel like she...

she really needs to
have some fun right now.

Why? Is something wrong?

Oh, no. What? What's
wrong with Charlotte?

Is she sick? Is that
what's on her plate?

No. No, no, no, no, no. No, she's
not... Charlotte isn't sick.

Well, something
is wrong, clearly!

-Are the kids okay?
-Yes, the kids

are absolutely okay!

-Okay.
-Okay.

And Harry? Is he sick?

Oh, my God! Harry's sick.

No! No! No, Harry is not sick.

Well, someone is sick! You just,
like, froze when I asked if...

It's the dog!

Richard Burton has dog cancer.

He has an incurable tumor.

-Oh, no.
-And he's dying.

Also, just don't
say anything to her,

'cause she's really...

She just... she doesn't
wanna... She's having a hard...

she doesn't wanna talk about it.

Okay, yes.

We have to go all out
and make sure it's fun.

-All the fun.
-Yes.

-Charlotte needs fun.
-Yes!

Fun, fun, fun, fun, fun.

I live two blocks away,

and today I was thinking,

why am I taking an
expensive, dirty cab downtown

to get my eyelash extensions

when I can just walk
into Lattes and Lashes?

Why don't you just take a Uber?

Here, let me take that.

Your nails are really something.

-Don't they get in the way?
-The way of what?

Here, I'm just gonna put
your pad on your face, okay?

Okay, ready?

Here you go.

You know, you
don't have to rush.

I have cleared two hours.

Two hours?

I got three people
waiting, diva.

-Period.
-Three people waiting?

Oh, so you must be
really good at this.

You are good at this, right?

I'm the best.

Hey...

would you like to come to my
friend Charlotte's birthday party?

No, absolutely
not. Deal-breaker.

Come on! It'll be fun.

Anyway, that's the goal.

Carrie told me that
Charlotte's dog has cancer

so this party is supposed
to lift her spirits.

You buried the lede!
God, that's awful.

God, if something happened to my dogs,
I simply don't think I could go on.

What's the poor pup's name?

Richard Burton.

Oh, I would say something snide here,
but I named mine Sappho and Socrates.

Hello, you.

She hates me, right?
Giuseppe's mother? So nasty.

I...

I think she was nice.

Yeah, but, like,
nice-nasty though, right?

Like, Duck, Duck, Goose? Nice to
you, nice to Char, nasty to me?

I hate to confirm your
conspiracy theory,

but I am meeting
Gia for lunch today.

Gia? Now it's Gia,
and it's lunch?

Don't get mad. She invited me.

We kinda hit it
off the other day.

Ah, of course, you did,
'cause you're not me.

Oh, my gosh, Anthony.

I have to get ready.
I'm sorry, I gotta go.

Go! Go! Have lunch
with your "Gia."

But put in a good word for me?

What, you want me to
pimp you out to his mom?

You have to. I love
him, he loves me,

he loves her, and she hates me.

And what's with the fancy
airs? And the accent?

She's from Buffalo, home
of the chicken wing.

Alright, I'll try.

Goodbye!

So, yes, I write about
love, and men and women.

So, I'm always interested in
other people's love stories.

There's so much to say about
Giuseppe's father and myself.

Where to start?

Well...

I was 21, and his
father was almost 50.

Shocking for America, but
for Roma, not so much.

Alessandro was my first man,

and after him, the
only man I ever wanted.

Mm. That's magical.

Well, it wasn't all magic.

My husband's teen children
loathed me from day one.

Nothing I did
mattered. Infuriating.

So much so, that I dropped art and
dove head-first into Freudian theory,

just to try to figure
out their psyche.

Sorry, I shouldn't spout on
about stepchildren, but...

I guess Sancerre is
the gateway to truth.

Not at all. It's actually...
it's very interesting.

My boyfriend has
children, and...

it's complicated.

Oh, so you're the enemy too?

No. No, no, no, I don't think.

Well...

maybe with one.

So, do you have any professional
perspective to share?

Don't waste years trying to be
who you think they'll accept.

Inauthentic beings never win.

Be yourself.

That way, at least, they're
meeting the real you.

And just remember,
it's always complicated

when a new love enters
an established dynamic.

Well, speaking of new loves, I
would be remiss if I didn't tell you

that Anthony is one
of the most authentic

and loving people
I've ever known.

Maybe I have him wrong.

Well, how do you have him?

I'd rather not say.

-Hi, ladies.
-Hi.

Oh, my goodness.

These are all the same?

Yes, all of these.

Harry?

Harry!

Harry!

Hi, honey!

What are you doing here?

I'm buying Lily a "life isn't over"
gift. What are you doing here?

-Harry!
-Oh, boy.

Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh,
boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy.

I did not want you
two to ever meet.

Well, Harry, do you want
to tell her, or should I?

Tell me what? And bear in mind,
I cannot hear any more bad news.

Bonnie...

is my personal shopper.

She picks out all your gifts.

Birthdays,
anniversaries, Hanukkah.

Bonnie, I would like you to
meet your wife, Charlotte.

Oh, hello.

Nice to meet you.

-And you have beautiful taste.
-Aw.

But I do not need a
birthday gift this year.

And you should be
at home resting.

That is what I
told him. So brave.

Well, any needs, I'm here.

Charlotte, I love that you
are wearing that blouse.

I wasn't sure if it was too
bold of a color for you.

"So brave"?

You told Bonnie?

I had to tell somebody.
It was driving me crazy.

Do you know how hard it is not
to talk to anybody about it?

Do I? Yes, yes, I
do! I think I do!

You can tell Bonnie, and
I can't tell my friends?

Bonnie is at Bergdorf's.
She's not part of our lives.

It's totally different,
babe. It just is.

Okay. Let's go home.

Oh, damn.

I wanted to get you the perfect
birthday gift this year.

Don't you mean Bonnie wanted to get me
the perfect birthday gift this year?

What, you want another Van Cleef
and Arpels Lucky Animal dog clip?

'Cause that's me
without Bonnie, okay?

Okay. Come on.

Well, to what do I owe this...

What... wait a minute,
what's happening? Why...

Why is your left eye
smaller than your right eye?

Cute story.

I was just at Union Square Café

trying to land a big client.

And my cheap-ass
eyelashes started to molt.

-Well, what's cute about that?
-Nothing.

-Day-drinking is required.
-Mm.

Champagne or rosé?

Champagne.

Hey, stranger.

What are we celebrating?

Clearly, not you finally
finishing Carrie's yard.

Well, good things take time.
You wanna come outside and see?

Oh, I don't do dirt.

Seema's having a
challenging day.

Which is even more reason for her to
attend Charlotte's birthday party.

Did you just backdoor
me a party invite?

I most certainly did, because
I need this party to be fun,

and no one's more fun than you.

-I'm fun.
-Well, "Fun Adam,"

would you like to join us
for a drink Saturday night?

I would. Yeah,
we'll both be there.

Right, Seema?

Oh. Well, it depends what I'm
doing Thursday and Friday.

Wait, your left
eye's a little red.

Well, of course, it is. I started
taking cabs for the first time in years,

and beyond being so unsexy, I think
they gave me whatever this is.

It's a loose eyelash.

-Ooh.
-May I?

-It's clean.
-Mm-hmm.

Make a wish and blow.

I wish Carrie's
yard was finished.

Are you gonna blow?

Don't make me call HR.

Okay, I'll blow for you.

Gonna turn the water off
soon. Nice seeing you.

Well, what was that?

-Nothing.
-Sure felt like something.

Well, he's got a yogi
girlfriend somewhere

and I am way too busy
building a fake company

to be building a
fake relationship.

If you say so.

That's great, you can
just put them, you know,

against the wall and,
oh, here they are.

You guys can decide
what's the best...

Ooh.

Did someone order fun?

God, Miranda! Those are...

Wow, gosh, those are very pink.

-Her favorite color!
-Mm-hmm.

Oh, where do you want the
karaoke machine, Aunt Carrie?

-Is "not here" an option?
-I told you.

You rented a karaoke machine?

No, I bought it. It was cheaper.

You said, "all out."

Nothing says "all out"
like balloons and karaoke!

Isn't it great? They
have confetti in them!

I'm here to apologize in advance

because tonight, there
will be... what...

Wait, those are my pages.
Are you... are you reading...

are you reading my
chapter right now?

Just finished.

It's brilliant.

That opening sentence?

"The woman wondered what
she'd gotten herself into."

It just stopped me
dead in my tracks.

Really? Oh, my God,
I'm so relieved.

And the way it flows
is so propulsive.

Well, you may want to
stop complimenting me

because I came to tell you that
tonight there will be noise upstairs.

A lot of noise.

Like...

karaoke, birthday,

-Cosmopolitans-level noise.
-Oh, I see.

So, instead of gifting you a hotel
room, which I did consider...

I'm begging you to join us.

And if, you know, you
have any critique,

bad or, you know,
I suppose good,

you can tell me over
a drink and karaoke.

Regrettably, karaoke.

I love karaoke.

Well, that, my friend, is
what they call in the biz...

...a plot twist.

Oh, Carrie.

-The caterer's here.
-Oh, already?

-Yeah.
-Oh.

Oops!

Here, let me...

Could one of you give me a hand?

-Oh, hi.
-Hello.

-Here, let me help.
-Oh, okay. Thank you.

-Is that good?
-Oh, perfect.

Great.

But do I have to come?

Well, no, honey, I guess
you don't have to come.

Okay, Rock, so
we're leaving in 20.

-Get up.
-Mom said I didn't have to.

She obviously didn't mean it.

Lily, Mom's going
through something.

I saw her sobbing in
the pantry yesterday.

She's been totally stressed
lately and needs us there.

Mom doesn't want me there like this,
and it's not even a big birthday.

You make Mom treat every one of your
birthdays like they're big ones!

The My Little Pony themed eighth
birthday with actual ponies.

Your Fortnite 14th?

The super weird "ironic"
Little Mermaid themed 17th

at the South Street Seaport.

The least we can do is be there.

I can't.

Get out of the
fucking bed, Ariel.

For anybody in the audience

who's got a birthday today,
happy birthday to you!

Smile! Over here, Mr. Burton!

Okay, maybe we should stop and take
a picture with the whole family.

Lily, come on,
Mom wants a photo.

-Okay.
-Maybe later.

Okay, well, why don't
you at least sit up

because someone else will
want to sit on the sofa too.

Nope. Hold on.

Do-over with Charlotte
and Richard Burton.

He didn't look at the camera.

Oh, okay.

-Rock, I guess we're out.
-Okay.

Hey!

Who's a Richard Burton?
Mommy's birthday is today!

-Hi!
-Hello.

I'm guessing from the proprietary
heft of your door swing

-that you must be Carrie.
-Ah, yes, I am.

-Is my swing hefty?
-It is.

-Oh.
-I'm Joy, Miranda's friend.

Oh, hello!

-Hey! Mm.
-Hey.

Mwah!

As you can see, Carrie, we're
a little more than friends.

Ah, yes, I already knew.
She kisses and tells.

-Here, I'll take that.
-Oh, thanks.

Wow, quite the
vocabulary. Impressive!

Come this way, you have
to meet the birthday girl.

Oh, my God! Is this Joy?

-It is! Joy, this is Charlotte.
-Ah! Oh!

What a festive little hat.

Oh, yes. Yes, it is! And
meet the rest of my family.

This is Harry, and Rock,
and that's Lily over there.

-Oh, look at you!
-And I'm out again.

Oh!

I've heard all about this
living legend from Miranda.

Well, she was very adamant
that I bring him tonight.

Well, naturally, you really have to spend
every moment you have left with him.

I wouldn't let
him leave my side!

She's a real dog person.

Happy Birthday!

Hi! You made it!

Oh, and you brought Henry!

I invited him. Dude.

-Dude.
-Harry, my man.

Oh! I am a person at the party.

-Herbert.
-How you doing?

No way!

They have GEARDON Pro with
touchscreen tablet karaoke!

Oh, they have karaoke.

Oh! They have karaoke!

I had a dream my life would be

So different from
this hell I'm living

Oh, honey, he does
not want my life.

He's either, like, 14 or 90.

-Last year's school play.
-Oh.

Now life has killed the dream

I dreamed

Wow!

Okay!

We have a whole
list of fun, "up,"

non-French-Revolution-themed
party songs.

Please tell your
son not to go again.

-Oh, now he's my son?
-When he's singing karaoke,

he's your son. It's too much.

Who is next?

Ooh.

I could go again.

Oh, yeah, well...

I'm hopelessly devoted to you

Thank you for inviting
me, Charlotte.

Oh, thank you. I need
a little pick-me-up.

-Oh.
-My trainer Mateo

is moving back to Portugal.

Now, who will I pulse
and squeeze with?

I'm out of my head

Hopelessly devoted to you

Welcome!

I'm so glad you could come.

-Come on in.
-Thanks, Carrie.

-That's for Char.
-Okay. Hi.

-Thank you for having us.
-Of course.

Hopelessly devoted to you

Anthony, what's wrong?

We brought Maleficent with us.

-Oh.
-If it comes up, I'm 49.

Okay, I'm 53.

Fifty-eight, final offer.

Charlotte, you remember
Giuseppe's mother,

Dottoressa Gianna Amato.

Charlotte, please call me Gia.

Of course! Welcome.

Thank you.

If it comes up, I
was never married.

Okay. Neither was I.

Oh my, so handsome!

I guess it's true what they say:

"When God closes a door,
he opens a dreamy window."

Ooh.

Copa

I'm gonna have to send
out apology notes.

Copacabana

Henry. Again.

Three times in a row!

I didn't expect this to
turn into a full-blown

one-boy cabaret,
but here we are.

Henry, have some cake.

I think it's time for a little
Girls Just Want to Have Fun.

-Am I right?
-Just when you think

it couldn't get worse.

Okay, let's have some
fresh faces up here.

Let me see. Where my girls at?

-Come and join me!
-Oh, God. Can she see me?

-Please tell me she can't see me.
-Let's...

-Carrie!
-Yes?

Come on over.

We want Charlotte to
have some fun, right?

Oh, gosh, thank you, no, but I'm
just... I'm too busy hosting.

Does anybody need anything?

-You're good?
-No, thanks!

Charlotte?

-Hmm?
-B-day girl, come on.

I mean, like we used
to back in the day!

No, thank you,
Miranda. I'm fine!

Okay, okay. Who can we...

Hey, Lily! Come on and
join me up here, huh?

Huh? Come on!

Girls Just Want to
Have Fun, am I right?

Come on, am I right,
Lily? Am I right?

Girls just want
to be left alone!

Oh, sorry.

Okay.

No.

No one wants to sing
now, so let's do gifts!

Girls just want to
open gifts, am I right?

We're gonna do gifts now!

I didn't bring a gift, did you?

I have a rule. I don't get gifts
for anyone who owns in New York.

I brought a candle,
just in case.

-Great. Put my name on it.
-Ooh, mine too.

We can't put three names
on a $40 re-gifted candle.

Or can we?

-Mm-mm. Mm-mm.
-Why?

-No.
-Just do it.

She brought...

Well, what the Pirates
of Park Avenue is that?

And since when
does Louis Vuitton

-make an eye patch?
-They don't.

It used to be a fanny
pack, but I was desperate.

-Aren't you handy?
-The eye doctor said

I had to cover it for a week
thanks to that infection

from that low-brow
eyebrow technician.

Ahoy!

Me fashionable matey.

Mm. This was caused by you

sticking your dirty
finger into my eye.

If you'd worked a little quicker

and finished the garden
before I stopped by,

we could have avoided an injury.

Are ye gonna make me
walk the plank, Cap'n?

Oh, Lulu, should we take the cake out
so it's room temp before we cut it?

-Sure.
-Oh, thanks.

Oh, and we need more champagne.

-You got it.
-Okay. Thank you.

Bring out more
champagne, Lonnie.

Ooh, I think I'm gonna need something
a bit stronger than that, darling.

Oh, you came.

Well, I thought your karaoke
warning was a bit dramatic,

but it turns out you
were exactly right.

Show tunes carry straight
down through the floorboards.

-And here's the next one!
-Oh, oh, oh!

-That's mine! That one's from me!
-Wow!

I said no gifts!

I'm afraid I've come gift-less.

Oh, I actually have no
idea what is happening.

This has somehow turned
into some sort of strange

-birthday/baby shower mashup.
-Ah.

Would you care to join
me on the back terrace...

for a smoke?

Oh. I thought you were
asking me to join you

on the back terrace to jump off.

Fendi.

-It's beautiful!
-Aw!

We are fucked.

I didn't know if it was
maybe a big birthday!

No, no, no, no!

Well, it's impossible
to tell these days.

Everyone looks so good.

I know a woman, 80,
whose face is only 50.

Yes, she wears a turtleneck
swimsuit in the pool,

but, you know, the
face, gorgeous.

I've been thinking,

and I'd like to know more about
you and your business, Anthony.

Oh. Well...

Okay, that's nice. Ask away.

So, you're selling sex, yes?

No, I'm selling bread.

Yes, bread, but with a bulge.

The uniform is all
about sex, yes?

Well, I think it's more about
fun. Just... it's just fun.

So, you think sex
is just about fun?

Interesting.

You seem nervous.

Of course, I'm nervous.
I want you to like me.

Oh. Interesting.

Wow, gorgeous! Mm!

It transported me to New York.

And then I realized,
"Wait, I'm in New York."

But the period motif,

which is impossible, mind you, I
think you're really onto something.

Because it's such a
modern sensibility,

but it's anchored in
this completely grounded

and beautifully
detailed tableau.

-The "woman"?
-Mm?

She's vibrant and
she's completely alive.

I'm serious, I think you
should be really proud.

Hmm.

Whoo!

I need more champagne.

That's mine.

That was so unnecessary of you.

-What did you get her?
-Well, I spoke to my vet,

and they suggested CBD treats
'cause they're supposed to be

really good for
terminal-stage pets.

-So, I just got the whole lot.
-No, no, no, no!

You're not supposed
to know about the dog.

It's a secret!

Well, maybe, just maybe,
you should have given me

that very important information
a little bit earlier.

Oh! Excuse me, sorry!

Oh, my goodness.

-You okay?
-Sorry! I'm so sorry.

I just realized, just in this moment,
that I've given you the wrong present.

-Oh!
-I'm so sorry, silly me.

I'm going to another
party tomorrow!

-Okay!
-Sorry!

-Here!
-Oh.

Now, I'm officially
getting embarrassed!

Oh, a candle!

That's from Anastasia and me.

-And my gift will be a song.
-Okay!

Do I love you, my, oh my

Yeah, river deep,
mountain high, yeah, yeah

Harry. I just wanted you to know
that when the unthinkable happens,

of course, Charlotte will
be devastated by the loss,

but we'll be there for her.

Baby

And that is not a re-gift!

There you are. Come here.

Did you tell Miranda
about my situation?

Of course not.

You asked me not to tell
anyone. That's what you asked.

I thought maybe you told
Miranda because I told Bonnie.

Well, there's no way I could
follow Janis Joplin over there.

Still, I did pick
a song that I love.

But it's a duet.

-Ohh!
-So...

would you do me the honor?

Tell me something, boy

Aren't you tired trying
to fill that void?

You know how I said I
was a fan of karaoke?

I was, until very recently.

Keepin' it so hardcore?

I'm falling

- In all the good
times - Excuse me.

Carrie, could I talk
to you for a second?

-Sure, yeah.
-Sorry.

Longin' for change

What? What's up?

Did you tell Miranda
about Harry being sick?

No. I would never.

Well, she said something to him
about when "the unthinkable happens."

Oh!

No, no, no, no, no.

Miranda almost guessed
that Harry was sick,

so I told her that Richard
Burton had an incurable tumor.

Oh, no!

That's almost worse!

In the sha-sha,
sha-la-la, la-low

Can I have another
one, please? Thank you.

Sha-la-low

I think it's so...

What is the word
I am looking for?

Tragic, maybe.

When someone older lusts
after someone younger.

What do you think
about that, Anthony?

Oh, you don't wanna know
what I'm thinking...

Gia.

Ahh

Ah, ha

I'm off the deep end,
watch as I dive in

It's not about you.

Miranda thinks that Mr. Burton
has an incurable tumor.

That's almost worse for you!

Why does she think that?

Carrie told her that to stop
her from learning about you.

And, yes.

I'm sorry. I told Carrie.

I had to! I was going crazy
trying to keep all this to myself.

Okay. Come on.

-Come on.
-I'm so nervous.

-What?
-Thank you. Mm-hmm.

Okay, enough with this
whisper down the lane.

Richard Burton is not dying.

-Wait. What, is the dog sick?
-No, he's fine.

I have prostate cancer.

-Harry!
-Oh, my God, Harry!

But, but, but, but,
but, we caught it early.

I'm having surgery next week.
They say it will be fine.

The real tragedy here is that
I asked my lovely, devoted wife

to keep it secret
from her best friends.

That was not smart.
It was not fair.

So, now, you can talk about it and
then maybe she can breathe a little.

Best birthday gift ever.

-So, taxi cabs are "not sexy."
-Mm-mm.

-And city buses are a "hell no."
-Mm-hmm.

Oh, have you ever... you
ever been in a pedicab?

-Mm-mm.
-Oh, well.

Times Square.

You got gridlocked tourists,
Jay-Z's Empire State of Mind

blasting through shitty
speakers right into your ear.

I had to get out of the cab.

I laid right there on
Broadway, I said to the driver,

"Dude, just run
me the fuck over."

Oh, okay.

An eye patch and a snort.
You're a real catch.

This must be so refreshing.

I'm sure your yoga
lady doesn't snort.

Actually, there is
no more yoga lady.

I ended things with her when I
smelled your perfume that first time.

Oh.

Well, I'm just gonna
grab some fresh drinks.

Okay.

Mama, we should go. You
have an early flight.

-I want to stay.
-For how long?

Because I really need to go
somewhere and crawl into a hole.

Oh, no, not stay here.

Stay in New York
for another week.

But why? You hate New York.

But I love my boy.

Did you enjoy the party?

Too much singing for
my taste. Shall we?

Oh, excuse me. Wait...

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, hold on there,

Cap'n Jaqueline Sparrow,
you're not leaving.

-He's available.
-Mm-hmm.

-I've got an eye patch.
-Mm.

So, I'm Irish-goodbye-ing.

Well, see, you're telling
me, so technically,

that doesn't really qualify
as an Irish goodbye 'cause...

Fine. I'm Indian-goodbye-ing.

-Okay.
-He might be just drunk enough

to forget this ever existed.

Okay, this goes out to the girl

who has the most beautiful
eye I've ever seen.

Her hair is Harlow gold

Her lips a sweet surprise

Her hands are never cold

She's got Bette Davis eye

She'll turn her music on you

You won't have to think twice

She's pure as New York snow

She's got Bette Davis eye

And she'll tease you,
she'll unease you

All the better
just to please you

She's precocious, and
she knows just what it

Takes to make a pro blush

She's got Greta
Garbo's standoff sighs

She's got Bette Davis eyes

Maybe a taxi can be sexy.

Trying to resist a pun here, but
it was a total joy to meet Joy.

Oh, yeah.

-Isn't she great?
-Yeah.

It just feels so, I don't know.

Effortless?

Amazing.

I think people
enjoyed the karaoke.

Sure, if that's the story
you're telling yourself.

It is.

And now, you have your
own karaoke machine

for all your future party
needs. Oh, yes, you do!

I do not have room
at my apartment.

And you have all this space
for a party, remember?

Mm.

I think Charlotte
had a fun time.

-Aw, she did. I'm so glad.
-Oh!

Yay! Us!

And you and Duncan seemed
to be having fun as well.

Kinda caught a
little vibe there.

Saw you across the room
laughing and sipping his drink.

Yes, I laughed and I sipped
a drink. What are you saying?

Wait, are you upset?

I don't understand what's
happening right now.

We were just doing a fun
little party debrief.

Miranda, I'm in a relationship.

Well, of course, you are!

I was just saying, it was
nice to see you having fun.

I don't have fun?

I'm not saying
anything is going on.

It's just...

-You know what? Never mind.
-No, no, no, no.

No, no, no, don't do
that. It's just...

what?

It's just, sometimes
it seems like...

like you're working
so hard with Aidan.

Well, yes, I guess I am.

Not all relationships
are effortless.

Yes. I got it.

I know Joy and I have
only been together for...

For what? A few weeks?

-A month.
-Well, that's great.

Aidan and I are over 20 years in,
and it's complicated right now.

So, yes, maybe I laughed
and had a sip of Scotch.

I am allowed to
laugh and sip Scotch.

Of course, you are.
That's what I'm saying.

No, that's not what you're saying.
What are you really saying?

Nothing, just...

"The woman wondered what she
had gotten herself into."

-It's in your book.
-Well, I know it's my book.

How do you know it's in my book?

You left it here this afternoon,

and I picked it up to
move for the caterer,

and I glanced at it.

Was I not supposed to read it?

I wrote that months ago.
Like, months and months ago.

So, you're not confused now?

It's fiction. Set in 1846.

Oh.

Well, I didn't read that far.

So, it's not you.

Well, I'm glad.

I'm sorry I said those
silly things before.

I was really...

-Hey, the trash is all out.
-Aw.

-I had to use your neighbor's cans, too.
-Oh, boy.

You need me to do anything else?

No. No.

-I think we're all good.
-Yeah, we're good.

We're good, right?

-We're good.
-Okay.

Okay, well, we should head out.

Do you know anybody who wants a
top-of-the-line karaoke machine?

Oh, no, no, no, no, no. You
gave me that for another party.

Okay!

Hey, fun party. That Henry
kid, he loves a ballad, huh?

Oh, my God.

-Oh!
-Oh, my God, that was crazy!

-Goodnight.
-Goodnight, goodnight, goodnight.

-Mm. Night.
-Goodnight.

Oh, wait, wait, wait! Here!

-Take one of these!
-Oh! Thank you.

You're welcome.

-Love you.
-Love you, too.

Hello, you.

The woman held on to
what she knew to be true.

Everything's fine, Shoe.

It's fine.