All language subtitles for ed_s01e04_pretty_girls_and_waffles

We have got some waffles.

Tasty, tasty waffles.

Hello, Mr. Waffle.

Goodbye, Mr. Waffle. You heard me,
waffles. You are a waffle.

Hi.

Hey, babe.

Listen to this.

One of my geniuses.

When I finished The Great Gatsby, I wept
for three hours.

Why do 17 -year -olds have epiphanies
three times a week?

Oh, it's probably got something to do
with that crazy rock and roll music

they're always listening to.

See what kind of epiphany this causes.

Can I have a waffle?

You bet. One waffle.

Coming up.

I'm looking for Ed Stevens.

I'm Ed Stevens.

You're the bowling alley lawyer?

Phil?

Yes, how can I help you?

Hi, I'm Ed Stevens.

This is Phil. He's... Actually, I don't
know what he is.

I'm Sheila McKenzie, and I need a
lawyer.

Well, I'm Ed Stevens, and I am a lawyer.
I know, and I hear you're a good one.

Let me guess.

Someone's suing you for being too damn
beautiful.

Very smooth, Phil.

Very smooth.

So I went to toss him a waffle like a
frisbee, like this.

And then at the last moment, I couldn't.

I had to put it on a plate.

Why? I don't know. I think I got self
-conscious.

Don't you think there's something wrong
with that or am I just crazy?

I'm going to have to go with option B.

I've been with Nick for seven years.

After seven years, you should be able to
toss somebody a waffle, right?

You know, I... I love hanging out with
you guys.

I mean, now that I'm married, I never
get to obsess over this kind of thing

anymore. Yeah, but were you ever
actually nutty enough to obsess over

not to toss someone a waffle? Well, no.

Exactly. Because that requires a very
special Carol Vessi brand of nuttiness

available in stores.

Um, Carol, honey, if I'm going to make
fun of you, I really actually need you

pay attention.

I have to break up with Nick.

the sky tonight there I can keep by your

side watching the

You agreed to this willingly.

You are looking at a former member of
the Stuckeyville community players.

It's just my way of giving a little
back.

All right. All right, when they asked
who wanted to be in charge of the school

play, this extremely cute new history
teacher volunteered, so they co

-volunteered. See, this now makes sense.

Yeah, well, I can't wait around for you,
you loser.

Of course not.

So, uh, gonna ask out your new client?

Molly. What?

You said she was pretty.

I'm just painting a word picture for
you. Ah, I see. Hi, honey.

Hey. Hi.

So, how are things in Waffle Land?

Waffle Land? Is this one of them ladies'
conversations?

It's about Nick.

Miles, can we not talk about this? What
about Nick?

Ed, can we not talk about this? You and
me are friends now. Buddies, pals,

chums, cronies, compadres, amigos. This
is exactly the type of thing that people

like you and I talk about.

Yeah. Okay.

Um... Oh, God, this is going to sound so
stupid. All right, um...

Nick and I were having breakfast at my
house. Came over for breakfast, gotcha.

No, Ed, he did not come over. He was
there. He slept there.

Crashed on your couch, gotcha.

No, Ed, he slept with me.

You sleep with Nick? Ooh -hoo!

Why do I even pop that? I'm sorry, I'm
sorry.

Go ahead. Seriously.

Okay, so I went to toss him a waffle
like a frisbee, and then at the last

I changed my mind and I put it on a
plate.

That's it. That's the whole story. There
it is.

No, that's a great story.

I especially like the part where you're
going to toss the waffle and instead you

put it on a plate.

Hello, Mr. Matthews.

Where's Dr. Jerome?

He's out today. I'm covering for him.

You're one of them male nurses.

Uh, no. I'm Dr.

Burton. I work here with Dr. Jerome.
Right, Dr.

Burton. Dr. Jerome told me about you.

So what seems to be the trouble? I
swallowed a moth.

And how'd you do that?

I yawned at the wrong time.

Okay. Well, do you feel sick?

I think I'll wait till Dr. Jerome comes
back.

Mr. Matthews, you don't have to leave.

I'm sure I can help you.

I was a secretary over at Stuckyville
Motors.

One day, out of the blue, my paycheck
had $95 extra in it.

So I cashed it.

And you didn't tell anyone about the
extra money? No, I didn't really think

about it. I thought maybe it was for
some extra overtime or... I didn't

know.

Okay. The next week, same thing.

And the week after that, and the week
after that, and the week after that.

For how long?

Almost a year.

Wow. I know.

So what'd you do? I didn't do anything.
I just kept cashing them.

I thought maybe it was some kind of
raise or something.

Okay. Three weeks ago, my boss, Dick
Knight, the owner, said it was a payroll

mistake. He wants to take me to court
for $4 ,900.

I don't have $4 ,900.

Um, I'll tell you what.

Why don't I start by paying a visit to
Dick Knight, okay?

Thank you so much for helping me.

That's okay.

It's what I do.

Excuse me for interrupting, but I just
have to say, you are so hot.

Phil. What? That's my rap.

This is going to sound very, very silly.

Do you remember the other morning at
breakfast you asked me if something was

wrong?

Well, something was wrong.

What?

Okay, um, you asked me for a waffle, and
this sounds crazy.

Okay, come on. It's me.

Okay, um, I wanted to toss you a waffle,
like a frisbee, and

at the last minute, I couldn't.

And I put it on a plate instead.

I get it.

I get it.

Listen to what I'm about to say very
carefully.

I am not sleeping with Jessica Martel.

This is not about your little teenage
whiter groupies.

Then what is it about?

It's about me not being able to throw
you a waffle.

Hello. I'm Bob Crickmore.

Hello, Bob Crickmore.

I'm Molly Hudson.

Ever done this before?

Talked to a guy.

Cast a school play.

No, no, I haven't. You?

Yeah, first time.

I was actually in a school play back in
high school.

Really? What play?

It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown.

Let me guess, Sally.

No, no, I played The Great Pumpkin.

I thought the great pumpkin never shows
up.

You're touching a sore spot here, Bob.

Let's face it, Nick. Things haven't been
that great between us for a while now,

and we can't just ignore it. Or maybe we
can. I don't know.

But I'm standing there, and I want to
throw you a waffle.

But something inside tells me that
you're going to think I'm silly if I

you a waffle, and I'm tired of worrying
about whether or not I'm good enough, or

if I'm... I should just...

be able to throw you a damn waffle. What
are you talking about? Go get a waffle,

toss it to me, and let's get on with our
pathetic lives.

I don't feel that comfortable around
you.

I feel like I always have to be at
attention or something.

I gotta tell you something.

Of all the stupid fights we've had, this
one right here is a top talk.

It's not stupid. It's not stupid to me.

It's... It's where are we going?

What's the future? I mean, do we have a
plan? What are we even doing together?

These are questions that at some point
normal people answer.

Whoa, whoa.

Time out. We just took a left turn into
hell.

Oh, you know what?

Forget it. Forget it because you never
listen to a word I say.

I'm done with this.

Carol, I don't even know what we're
talking about here.

You sound like one of those mothers, but
most of the other kids Sarah's age are

rolling over by now.

Well, goodbye, Harvard.

Hey, that's not what I mean. I just, you
know, want to make sure she's okay.

I didn't roll over to my 23rd birthday.

Oh, my God.

I'm married to the funniest man alive.

Hello. What are you going to have, Mike?

I'm going to go with a hamburger.

Ten bucks.

If instead of asking the waitress for a
hamburger, you say, and you only say,

burger me.

You two are infants.

You know that?

What can I get you, folks?

Can I get some of the turkey club with
the curly fries?

I will have the grilled cheese, please.
Thank you.

And you, sir?

Burger me.

I'm sorry?

Burger me.

Does that mean that you want me to bring
you a hamburger?

Okay. That was Molly.

How's she doing?

Carol just broke up with Nick.

Dick Knight, Stocky Hill Motors. Right,
right. Look at that posture.

Like you got an iron rod stuck right up
your spine. That's great stuff.

Thanks, I guess.

Listen, my name's Ed Stevens. I gotta
ask you a favor.

A favor?

Take this car.

Oh, no. Listen, I'm not here to buy a
car. Well, that's good, because I ain't

selling it. Take it.

No, I'm a lawyer, actually.

And I'm representing a former employee
of yours, Selah McKenzie.

Selah, great gal. At least sit in the
car. You know, I'd really prefer not to.

What I'd like to not do... Indulge me.

Contoured leather flown in from Spain.
Mr. Knight, I am not here to buy a car.

I'm here to talk about Selah McKenzie.

How about sitting in the car? I don't
want to sit in the car. Why don't you

sit in the car? I'd rather not. Could
you just sit? Could we not? Sit. No.

Okay, Kevin.

We're ready whenever you are.

You went uptown riding in your limousine
in your fine Park Avenue clothes.

You had the Dom Perignon in your hand
and the spoon up your nose.

Ooh, when you wake up in the morning
with your head on fire and your eyes too

bloody to see.

I'm going to go to the bathroom. I'll be
back in about four hours. No, you

don't. We're in this together.

No, no, no, no, you had to be a big
shot, didn't you? You had to open up

mouth. My client never realized that the
money in her paycheck wasn't hers, so

now to ask for it back, it really
seems... Do you play golf?

What? You look like a golfer.

A little, but listen... What do you hit
from 150?

I'm guessing an 8 -iron.

Don't tell me you're smacking the 9.

Really more like a 7.

You're a damn hustler, aren't you?

I gotta get you up to the club. I could
make some money on you, boy.

Take her.

She's yours.

I'm not buying this car. Good, because I
ain't selling it.

Mr. Knight, Fiona McKenzie does not have
the $4 ,900 to pay you back. Fine.

Forget the $4 ,900.

Just take the car and get out of here.
Wait a minute. You mean you're dropping

the case? The case is gone.

Just take the car.

I'm not buying this car. Good, because I
ain't selling it.

Wait a minute. Where's my car?

Dr. Jerome, you wanted to see me?

Oh, Dr. Burton.

You know, when I take a day off, you
know what I like to do?

I know how much you enjoy your poetry,
sir.

That's right, I do. I go down to the
basement with a bottle of red wine and a

pack of smokes, and I don't have a care
in the world.

Hobbies are a great way to relax.

Except when you can't relax.

Sir?

We received a lot of complaints from our
patients yesterday, Dr. Burton.

Dr. Jerome, if I might, it seems many of
the patients have misconceptions about

me. If I'm going to turn over my
practice to you when I retire, you have

show me and the patients that you're a
confident and competent physician.

So I'm going to observe you.

Observe me? Yeah, I want to watch you
with the patients, see why they don't

confidence in you.

Dr. Jerome, I've worked here for two
years. I really don't think this is

necessary. My practice, my rules.

That's right. Pardon? That's right, yes.

To Miss Carol Vessi, Stuckyville High
School. Remember, no carnations.

Thank you.

Hi, Ed.

Hey, Sheila. Listen, great news.

Spoke to Dick Knight. You're not going
to believe this. He's dropping the case.

Said forget the $4 ,900.

It's great.

He called me ten minutes ago and said if
I didn't pay him the money by the end

of the week, he'd find a way to put me
in jail.

What? You're kidding me.

Dick Knight is a bad man, Ed.

This is crazy.

You won't let me go to jail, will you?

You're not going to jail, Sheila.

Yeah, Ed, listen. They're sending a
copter to sit me down in Washington to

untangle this whole Federal Reserve,
international banking, interest rate

euro -dollar trickle -down -for -ply
-side -voodoo -economic -stagflation

nonsense.

Oh, hey.

Don't even try.

Nothing's fine, I'm torn.

I'm all out of faith.

This is how I feel.

I'm cold and I'm ashamed.

Lying naked on the floor.

Very nice, Godfrey.

Did you hear how I said a thing, floor?
I said floor.

Floor.

That was a good choice.

Okay,

um, you know what? I think it's time to
pick the male lead. Hey, I think we

should call back... him and him.

Me too.

Those are the exact two I was gonna
choose.

Great minds.

Okay, now the big one.

Female lead. I think there's only one
choice.

Me too.

Kelly Kovacs?

Well, she's not talented. She's just
pretty.

You can't give the lead of the school
play to a girl just because she's

I thought she was good.

Who do you want?

Jennifer Baumgarten.

Molly, she was terrible.

Did you actually listen to her? I mean,
forget about what she looks like. She is

the most talented.

Jennifer Baumgarten is not a lead.

I had such high hopes for you, Bob
Crickmore.

Well, Mr. Tim Casman, looks like you got
yourself a good old -fashioned ear

infection. I'm going to give you some
tetracycline.

Do you disagree with that, Dr. Jerome?
No, if you think that's best, go right

ahead. I don't know why. What do you
think she has? Hey, you're the doctor.

just observing. Pretend I'm not here.

Hello. I have some flowers for Miss
Carol Vesey.

Oh, that's me.

Thank you

Hi

I had this

crazy dream that you were busting us up
over a waffle That

wasn't a dream

Where are the flowers from?

Ed. Don't tell me all this is about that
little piss ant.

It isn't.

Carol, we need to talk.

How many times have we broken up?

Quite a few.

And every time we get back together
because we keep talking, that's what we

right?

Can we just sleep on this?

I'm so very tired right now.

Carol, I know this isn't about a damn
waffle.

I'm not an idiot.

But seven years deserves a real
conversation.

Don't you think?

Okay.

Tomorrow.

Mr. Knight. Ed!

How's my boy?

Where's my car?

Oh, I need a little undercoating. Got
her in the shop.

I didn't ask for undercoating. Not
paying for undercoating. You got that

Undercoding's on me.

Mr. Knight. Ah, ah, ah, ah.

Dickie. Are you suing Celia McKenzie for
$4 ,900 or aren't you? Well, I gotta

get my money back, Eddie. A guy's got a
right to get his money back. You told me

you were forgetting the whole thing. How
do you like driving that car? It's

classier than eating caviar off a pearl
spoon, ain't it? I'm not buying this

car. Good, because I ain't selling it.
May I have my car back, please? Well,

she's gonna need about five days.

I'll see you in court, Mr. Knight. Well,
now, all right.

You want to forget about the $4 ,900?

Well, forget about the $4 ,900. There.
Poof. It's just forgotten. Never

happened.

I'll settle this in court, Mr. Knight.

Call me Dickie and stop by the club.

I would march right in there and I would
say, Dr. Jerome, I will not stand for

it. I'm not going to take this anymore.
Mike, you're a good doctor and he's just

being ridiculous.

I'd rather just wait for him to die.

Hey. Hey.

Sorry, I can't stay. I gotta go work on
a case. Did you find the book in my

room? The law book?

Oh, yeah.

Thank you. Ed, did you get a new car?

No. And it's a loaner. Or something.

Man, that is a honey.

Ed?

Hey, Carol. Hi.

You busy?

No, not at all. Come on in. Please, have
a seat.

Thanks for the flowers.

Oh, yeah.

How you holding up?

Can I ask you a question?

Sure.

How did you know for sure when it was
time for your marriage to end?

Well, Carol, when I walked in and I
found my wife lying naked in bed with a

mailman, pretty much a no -brainer.

Hmm. I miss her, though.

I mean, I don't want it back, but I miss
her. How crazy is that, you know?

When they wired us humans up, they
really should have labeled the wires,

you think?

Yeah, I am.

I have to get together tomorrow with
Nick to have the big talk.

Ooh. Well, um, do you want some advice
from someone who's been through this

of thing?

Yeah.

I haven't got a clue.

I haven't either.

Hiya. Oh, hey. Hi, Sheila.

Um, Carol.

This is Celia McKenzie, my newest
client.

This is Carol Vesey. Hi.

It's nice to meet you. Same here.

I brought the payroll forms and the pay
stubs, but I can come back.

No, no, no. I should probably get going
anyhow.

Good to meet you.

Thanks, Ed.

Good luck.

So, I'm going to need to know everything
there is to know about Stuckyville

Motors, yourself, and... Dick Knight.

Okay. Where do we start?

Now I told you, though you ought to
know.

You must get this kind of thing all the
time.

Not exactly this kind of thing.

Hey. Hey.

Morning. Morning.

So, uh, Nancy tells me you didn't come
home last night.

Hubba hubba.

Oh, man, I fell asleep at my desk
working.

Uh, can't let Miss deal it down, can we?

Yeah, right.

Speaking of which, how's Mr. Extremely
Cute new history teacher?

Uh, making you jealous?

Well, of course. Ah, good.

I don't know. You know, I thought he was
one of the good guys, but now I'm not

so sure.

Why? What happened?

He wants to cast the prettiest girl in
school as the lead instead of a really

talented, albeit less attractive girl
who deserves the part.

Mm -hmm.

What is it with you guys and looks
anyway?

Guys and looks?

Yeah. What is it that made you decide to
cast the school play again?

Good point, Counselor.

Miss McKenzie, when you received your
paycheck and you saw there was a

what did you think?

To be honest, I didn't really notice it
at first.

Then I thought maybe some kind of raise
or something had kicked in. Were you due

a raise?

Well, no, not really, but... Did you
report the mistake to anyone?

I didn't think it was a mistake.

Really?

Did you think it was some kind of a
bonus for, I don't know, looking good?

Objection. Sustained.

Nothing further at this time.

Bowl away, Counselor.

Bowl away.

Bowl away.

Because... Because I own a bowling
alley.

That's very clever.

You've made your point, Mr. Stevens.
Thank you, Your Honor.

Now, it sounds to me like you truly
believe this paycheck was right.

I did. And now the money's gone. You
spent it because you thought it was

That's right.

Imagine if someone won $10 million in
the lottery.

Quit their job. They bought some kind of
business for say a million bucks, but

then the lottery guys come and they say
oops Wrong ticket we made a mistake and

furthermore you should have known he
made a mistake so give us our money back

Well that person never quit their job
never bought a business would never have

changed their life if this mistake had
not been made This is the same thing

with less money where I went to law
school. They taught us that lawyers were

supposed to ask questions.

Is that right?

No problem

Do you agree with what I just said?

Yes.

Thank you.

Recheck the charts and we'll go over
them later this afternoon.

Okay?

Dr. Burton, you wanted to talk.

Yes, I did, Dr. Jerome.

Let me just say this straight.

I'm a good doctor, Dr. Jerome.

I graduated Johns Hopkins with honors.

Standing over me while I treat patients
is insulting.

It's a waste of your time, undermines my
authority, and I'd like you to stop

doing it.

All right, then. Thanks for your time,
Dr. Jerome.

Dr. Burton, take a seat.

You've got some set of stones.

You're going to tell me how to run a
practice?

I took over this place 38 years ago when
it was an Orange Julius stand. You

weren't even born yet, you fat -headed
lummox. Before I let you touch another

patient, you know who you're going to
examine?

Me. That's right.

Dr. Walter Jerome!

Hey.

Ed, what are you doing? You're always
helping me out. I thought I'd lend some

moral support.

Thank you. You're welcome.

Ed Stevens, this is the evil Bob
Crickmore I told you about, who we're

hoping comes to his senses. Hey, Bob.
Going up against Molly. Brave man.

Stupid man.

Okay, Kelly Kovacs, whenever you're
ready.

Wow.

She is pretty.

Of course, at this point, it's all about
the singing that she does.

There's no...

Business like show, business like no
business I know.

Everything about it is appealing.

Everything the traffic will allow.

Nowhere can you get that happy feeling
when you are stealing that extra bell.

Carol, listen to me.

Some relationships...

Go in a straight line.

You know, A to B all the way to Z.

Ours is three -dimensional.

It's four -dimensional.

Kicks and screams and all directions.

It's chemical, you know?

Hate it, love it, kick it in the ass if
you want to, but don't turn your back on

it, Carol.

It deserves more than that.

Yesterday they told you you would not go
far. That night you opened and there

you are.

You know what I mean? Next day on your
dressing room they found the star.

Let's go on with the show.

Let's go on with the show.

Thank you, Jennifer. Good job.

I still think Kelly Kovacs is better.

Bob, you are blinded by her looks.

Ed, you're an impartial observer.

Who do you think's better?

No, no, no. Not my area.

Chicken. So how do we break the tie?

All right.

Let's bring him back one more time
Friday night for another teacher. And

whatever that teacher says goes.

How about Carol Vesey?

No way. She's your friend.

Let's pick at random. I've got a faculty
list right here.

All right. Close your eyes.

Plunk down your finger.

Bill Watts Lewis. Great.

The metal shop guy.

Nick, do you remember that 4th of July
down by the railroad tracks?

Yeah.

Do you remember how dark it was?

And then, all of a sudden, it was
just... The whole sky was filled with...

Reds and yellows and blues and the
sounds.

God, pops, bangs, whirs.

And then all that sound and that color
just

faded away, you know?

Mr. Knight, do you think my client's
pretty?

She's all right.

All right.

Just all right.

Just look at her.

She's beautiful, isn't she?

I think she is.

Yeah. Oh, okay. Yes.

Yes. She's a very attractive young lady.

Did you ever ask her out on a date?

Ha! I wouldn't call it a date.

What would you call it? I'd call it a
celebratory cocktail.

We just completed a very successful
Toyota -thon.

Sold 14 hatchbacks in one afternoon.

So did she go out with you?

No, sir.

She declined.

Did you have strong feelings for my
client at that time? I haven't got any

feelings for Selah McKenzie. I asked her
out. It's no big deal. I'm Dick Knight,

for God's sake. The bull's got to run.

Yes.

Did you write her a love letter?

Let me help refresh your memory.

This is a letter written by you to Celia
McKenzie on October 20th, 1999.

Care to read it for the court, please?

I'd prefer not to.

Indulge me.

Dear Celia, you are a butterfly and I am
a

flower. You flit about beautiful and
fickle.

While I stand motionless, imploding with
hope that one day you will alight upon

my petals.

Holy crap.

Objection. Sorry.

Miss Hudson?

Oh, hi, Jennifer.

I'm pulling out of the play.

What? Why?

This whole beauty versus the beast thing
is wearing a little thin.

Okay, listen to me. Some people just
have to work harder than others to get

they want.

Right. Ugly people.

Okay, number one, you are not ugly.

Number two, you know, it's much better
to not have things just fall right into

your lap in life.

Trust me. You end up with much better
stories.

I'd rather have an easy life with boring
stories.

Yeah, me too.

So listen, I talked to some of my old
community theater buddies, and they said

they'd help prepare for the audition,
but...

It's totally up to you.

If you say no, you fail science.

All right.

Okay, great.

Well, on October 20th, you wrote Miss
McKenzie this love letter.

How did she respond?

She ignored me.

Interesting. So October 20th, you write
a love letter, you get no response. On

October 26th, you ask her out, you get
rejected. Then on October 29th...

extra money in Celia McKenzie's
paycheck.

Coincidence? Calls for speculation.

Is it not possible that you put the
extra money in Celia McKenzie's paycheck

purpose to set her up? That's
ridiculous. Knowing that she, like most

would not report the extra money. So you
put the extra money in her paycheck,

and then you wait, patiently, like a
cobra in the grass.

And then when you figure she's taken
more, that she can pay it back.

Fuck.

Isn't that what happened? No.

Thank you.

I think you're looking at a 7 -10 split.

Oh, good morning, Dr. Burton.

Please begin my examination.

Uh, well, uh, okay.

What seems to be troubling you today,
Dr. Jerome?

Call me Larry.

Your first name's Walter. Yes, but I'm a
fictional patient.

I'm experiencing dizziness.

nausea, severe headaches, and a general
feeling of malaise.

Okay, well, those symptoms describe
quite a few ailments. For one, it could

indicative of the... I want a full
examination, doctor.

You mean I touch you?

I am your patient.

You are my doctor.

Put your hands upon me and make me well.

Okay,

I really didn't know how far we were
taking this. Ow! What?

That hurt.

I barely had my fingers on you. I'm
pretending that my lymph nodes are

the touch.

Oh, I get it. Tender lymph nodes.

Okay, let me ask you something, Larry.
Are they also swollen? Do they look

swollen?

Well, no. I can see they're not swollen
in real life. Then trust your instincts.

A doctor must always trust his
instincts.

I trust my instincts, but we were just
pretending that your lymph nodes... Ah,

cough. How long have you had to cough?

That was a real cough.

Sheila McKenzie knew there was extra
money in her paycheck.

She chose to keep that money.

And that money was not hers to keep.
Plain and simple. End of story.

She needs to give that money back.

Pretty girls.

Pretty girls.

They do strange things to us men.

Make us stand up straight.

Make us tuck in our shirts.

Make us buy fancy sports cars.

And sometimes when we can't have them,
they make us behave very badly.

Well, Celia McKenzie is not to blame for
being pretty.

But Dick Knight is to blame for being
devious.

Thank you.

What is your diagnosis, Dr. Burton?

Well, let's see.

You're experiencing nausea, dizziness,
and malaise.

Your lymph nodes are sensitive but not
swollen.

We're pretending your spleen tip is
palpable 2 centimeters below the right

costal margin and that your blood came
back with an elevated bilirubin count.

White cell count, normal, but atypical
lymphocytes on the smear. Therefore, I'm

ruling out both hepatitis A and B and
saying that you have a case of acute

mononucleosis, which could, of course,
be confirmed with EBV serologies or a

heterophile antibody test.

Aren't you forgetting something, Dr.
Burton?

Um, forgetting something?

You forgot to offer me a lollipop.

Yes.

Ms. McKenzie.

Regardless of whether or not Mr. Knight
gave you that money on purpose, you

could have avoided all of your troubles
by simply reporting it.

So I rule that Ms. McKenzie needs to pay
back $4 ,900 in its entirety to

Stuckeyville Motors.

However, since I do believe that Mr.
Stevens has offered sufficient proof

Mr. Knight did indeed behave deviously,
I order that the money be paid back,

without interest, $5 a week over the
next 18 years.

That's great.

Thank you, Ed. You're welcome, Sheila.

Ed? Yeah?

Could I interest you in a celebratory
cocktail?

Oh.

I'm afraid I'm going to have to take a
rain check.

I have to go see a friend of mine
tonight.

Well, you're right on time.

How have I been?

Well, that can't work.

How about you?

How about those big dates?

Sometimes true, according to plan. Are
you married yet?

Huh. I thought you would be by now.

I don't think I can take you being
adorable right now.

I'm sorry.

I can't turn that off.

I need to come in.

I don't think that's a very good idea.

Not like that. I just want to make sure
you're all right.

Remember, I am an expert in this type of
thing.

Besides, I have something here that'll
help.

Okay. Hang on a minute.

There's no business like show business,

like no business I know.

Everything about it is appealing.

Everything that traffic will allow.

Can you get that happy feeling when you
are feeling that extra bow?

There's no people like show people.

They smile when they are low.

Yesterday they told you you were...

pretty broad.

I used to work at the Stuckyville ice
cream shop.

You worked in an ice cream shop, a nut
store, the bowling alley, and a lover.

I worked a lot more places than that.

My secret?

Not very good at any one thing. One
scoop or two.

I'm sorry.

Let's start with two.