All language subtitles for ed_s01e02_the_world_of_possibility

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,810 --> 00:00:05,230 Five days and I cannot stop thinking about it. Five days and you cannot stop 2 00:00:05,230 --> 00:00:07,810 talking about it. Like I'm telling you, it was one of those moments, me and 3 00:00:07,810 --> 00:00:09,450 Carol Vessi. Carol Vessi! 4 00:00:09,890 --> 00:00:12,690 Imagine being back in high school looking at one of those crystal balls 5 00:00:12,690 --> 00:00:15,950 seeing that one day Ed Stevens would be kissing Carol Vessi. What would you have 6 00:00:15,950 --> 00:00:17,630 said? Faulty ball. Exactly. 7 00:00:19,030 --> 00:00:22,390 Wow. Is there an occasion? 8 00:00:23,590 --> 00:00:25,010 I finished a draft of the book. 9 00:00:25,870 --> 00:00:27,850 I thought a celebration was in order. 10 00:00:28,890 --> 00:00:29,890 That's great. 11 00:00:30,370 --> 00:00:31,810 That's really great. Congratulations. 12 00:00:33,330 --> 00:00:34,330 You okay? 13 00:00:34,450 --> 00:00:36,150 Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. 14 00:00:36,610 --> 00:00:37,610 To the book. 15 00:00:40,190 --> 00:00:43,490 I don't know what they mean by this whole living like a baby thing. It took 16 00:00:43,490 --> 00:00:44,670 an hour to get Sarah to go to sleep. 17 00:00:44,990 --> 00:00:46,470 And that's what Ed's talking about. 18 00:00:46,670 --> 00:00:48,470 Are you kidding me, Carl Bessie? Oh, yes, he is. 19 00:00:48,710 --> 00:00:51,630 You both realize that after the kiss, he invited me back into her house. 20 00:00:51,990 --> 00:00:54,830 I don't think we're going to go in there and play Parchees. You say play 21 00:00:54,830 --> 00:00:57,570 Parchees here. No, just... Regular play parches, you know close. 22 00:00:57,790 --> 00:01:00,110 You're saying you would have played parches? I'm saying we would have had 23 00:01:00,310 --> 00:01:01,310 Gotcha. 24 00:01:01,350 --> 00:01:06,950 Carol, I was thinking, after all the ups and downs and ins and outs we've had 25 00:01:06,950 --> 00:01:10,890 over the years, there are only two things I'm sure of. 26 00:01:12,350 --> 00:01:13,350 What? 27 00:01:13,570 --> 00:01:17,710 Number one, I am a self -centered, self -absorbed horse's ass and probably 28 00:01:17,710 --> 00:01:18,710 always will be. 29 00:01:18,810 --> 00:01:21,410 Oh. Actually, I knew that one before I met you. 30 00:01:22,450 --> 00:01:23,450 Oh. 31 00:01:23,780 --> 00:01:25,660 Okay, and number two? 32 00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:28,360 I am in love with you. 33 00:01:29,440 --> 00:01:30,780 Deep. Total. 34 00:01:32,440 --> 00:01:33,440 Helpless. 35 00:01:34,540 --> 00:01:35,600 I love you too. 36 00:01:36,540 --> 00:01:38,940 She wants me. She wants me. She wants me. 37 00:01:39,320 --> 00:01:41,880 One part razzle, one part dazzle. Kaboom. 38 00:01:42,140 --> 00:01:46,580 Carol, that's what she wants. Ed Stevens. Life is so funny. 39 00:01:47,820 --> 00:01:50,380 Funny, funny, funny, funny, funny. 40 00:01:50,660 --> 00:01:52,480 Eddie, you're not thinking clearly here. 41 00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:55,480 I mean, Liz broke up with you three weeks ago. You said yourself no one can 42 00:01:55,480 --> 00:01:56,800 over a seven -year marriage in three weeks. 43 00:01:57,000 --> 00:02:00,160 Nancy, I do not want to think about Liz. And do you know why? Because Liz slept 44 00:02:00,160 --> 00:02:03,080 with a mailman. And when my wife sleeps with a mailman, I try not to think about 45 00:02:03,080 --> 00:02:04,800 it. This is just a little policy of mine. 46 00:02:05,900 --> 00:02:11,480 Buddy, you know, I think maybe you're using this whole Carol Becky thing to 47 00:02:11,480 --> 00:02:15,200 avoid facing your pain. All right, that's it for this episode of Dr. 48 00:02:15,440 --> 00:02:16,418 Moore. 49 00:02:16,420 --> 00:02:17,600 You've got patients to see tomorrow. 50 00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:19,680 Night, Ed. 51 00:02:23,690 --> 00:02:26,030 I guess I should probably go to my room, right? 52 00:03:12,270 --> 00:03:16,990 I'm done talking here because I did not order a window with palm trees on it. 53 00:03:17,250 --> 00:03:19,210 Look, I got to go. All my stuff just got here. 54 00:03:20,070 --> 00:03:23,410 No, I'm saying I didn't order palm trees. 55 00:03:24,250 --> 00:03:28,290 Thanks, Kenny. I didn't order palm trees because it's not appropriate for a law 56 00:03:28,290 --> 00:03:29,290 office. That's why. 57 00:03:30,150 --> 00:03:33,670 I am well aware it's a law office inside a bowling alley. It's a law office 58 00:03:33,670 --> 00:03:36,530 nonetheless, my friend. That's right. That's right. And I did not order palm 59 00:03:36,530 --> 00:03:37,530 trees. I didn't know. 60 00:03:42,860 --> 00:03:43,860 Is this about a sign? 61 00:03:44,340 --> 00:03:45,340 Oh. 62 00:03:46,340 --> 00:03:47,340 Yeah. 63 00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:52,240 So what I'm thinking is Stucky Ball. 64 00:03:52,500 --> 00:03:55,100 Big blue letters down by the pins right across the lanes. 65 00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:56,800 $1 ,500. 66 00:03:56,920 --> 00:03:59,200 What? What? Oh, no, Dr. Burton, please. 67 00:03:59,620 --> 00:04:02,260 Come on. I'm a local. How about $300? 68 00:04:03,020 --> 00:04:04,660 Well, let's see. 69 00:04:05,280 --> 00:04:07,140 How about $1 ,500? 70 00:04:07,980 --> 00:04:08,959 That's crazy. 71 00:04:08,960 --> 00:04:09,960 Not you. No. 72 00:04:10,220 --> 00:04:12,920 Uh, that can't stay there. Yeah, that's all gotta go. Hey, take a look at this 73 00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:16,260 catalog, man. They got everything we need for the snack bar. Hey, what do you 74 00:04:16,260 --> 00:04:17,260 think of these bad boys? 75 00:04:17,720 --> 00:04:20,420 Phil, those are salt and pepper shakers, okay? Salt and pepper shakers, by 76 00:04:20,420 --> 00:04:22,940 definition, cannot be bad boys. Yeah, Mike, look, we need to go into town 77 00:04:22,940 --> 00:04:26,120 exactly 1130 to get coffee. Hey, do you like the Colonial or the Empress? 78 00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:27,220 Because I'm really torn. 79 00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:29,140 Because I need to run into Carol Vesey accidentally. 80 00:04:29,380 --> 00:04:32,360 OG 54073, bingo, the Imperial. 81 00:04:32,660 --> 00:04:33,820 Ed, Ed, Ed, the Imperial. 82 00:04:34,140 --> 00:04:37,120 Phil, you know what? You know what? You go ahead. You pick the salt and pepper 83 00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:37,849 shakers, okay? 84 00:04:37,850 --> 00:04:40,730 Pick the napkin holders, pick the ketchup dispensers, knock yourself out, 85 00:04:40,730 --> 00:04:44,970 man, okay? Yeah, Mike, 11 .30. Don't be late. Man, you continue to impress me. 86 00:04:44,990 --> 00:04:48,110 You're not afraid to delegate. So you want that Stucky Bowl sign or what? Not 87 00:04:48,110 --> 00:04:49,110 for $1 ,500. 88 00:04:49,470 --> 00:04:51,030 I bet Shirley'd do it for free. 89 00:04:51,910 --> 00:04:52,910 Shirley? 90 00:04:53,170 --> 00:04:57,010 She's very talented. You know that big Stuckyville Motors pelican sign? Yeah. 91 00:04:57,050 --> 00:04:58,050 She designed a pelican. 92 00:04:58,630 --> 00:05:00,170 She... Oh, Shirley? 93 00:05:00,530 --> 00:05:01,690 She... Shirley! 94 00:05:04,010 --> 00:05:05,590 No, uh, Shirley, no. 95 00:05:06,110 --> 00:05:11,450 I just want to ask you... You know that Stuckyville Motors pelican sign? 96 00:05:12,190 --> 00:05:13,410 She designed a pelican. 97 00:05:14,690 --> 00:05:15,690 Okay, Kenny? 98 00:05:16,190 --> 00:05:18,530 You just kind of said that. 99 00:05:19,470 --> 00:05:20,470 Hi, 100 00:05:22,290 --> 00:05:23,870 Linda. Hi, Mrs. Burton. 101 00:05:26,690 --> 00:05:27,690 Mom's here. 102 00:05:28,890 --> 00:05:29,890 Mom's here. 103 00:05:30,170 --> 00:05:31,170 Hi. 104 00:05:31,410 --> 00:05:34,270 I had a little break from the office, and I just wanted to see how my little 105 00:05:34,270 --> 00:05:35,270 munchkin was doing. 106 00:05:36,140 --> 00:05:37,920 Hello, it's Sarah. It's Mommy. 107 00:05:38,520 --> 00:05:39,900 She's doing just great. 108 00:05:40,240 --> 00:05:44,280 Aren't you? I was just worried that she might be having a hard time adjusting to 109 00:05:44,280 --> 00:05:46,160 me going back to work, you know. 110 00:05:46,900 --> 00:05:47,920 No, not at all. 111 00:05:48,360 --> 00:05:50,020 She's a happy, happy baby. 112 00:05:50,880 --> 00:05:52,240 Yes, you are. 113 00:05:52,700 --> 00:05:54,180 Good. That's great. 114 00:05:54,420 --> 00:05:55,420 Yeah. 115 00:05:58,480 --> 00:05:59,480 Stucky ball? 116 00:05:59,720 --> 00:06:02,160 Yeah, I'm taking big blue letters down by the pins. 117 00:06:03,920 --> 00:06:05,640 I love this Tuckerville Motor Pelican sign. 118 00:06:06,040 --> 00:06:09,500 You know the owner, Dick Knight? Sold me my first car. He's got a prosthetic 119 00:06:09,500 --> 00:06:10,500 chin. 120 00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:12,119 Is that right? 121 00:06:12,120 --> 00:06:13,120 I'll do it. 122 00:06:13,920 --> 00:06:15,800 Okay, great. 123 00:06:20,700 --> 00:06:27,620 Welcome to the wonderful world of poshability. 124 00:06:31,630 --> 00:06:34,170 Look at that. A gold coin in your ear. My God. 125 00:06:35,230 --> 00:06:36,830 Stuckyville Stan. I don't believe this. 126 00:06:37,070 --> 00:06:38,070 The one and only. 127 00:06:38,650 --> 00:06:40,490 And I need a lawyer. 128 00:06:40,750 --> 00:06:43,570 I don't believe this. When I was a kid, my friends and I thought you were a god. 129 00:06:43,630 --> 00:06:47,610 You performed at my 6th, 7th, 8th, and 10th birthday parties. June 20th. 130 00:06:47,610 --> 00:06:48,950 26th. Oh. 131 00:06:50,010 --> 00:06:54,070 Well, I... Oh. 132 00:06:54,770 --> 00:06:56,370 Sorry about that. I'm still getting set up here. 133 00:06:57,310 --> 00:06:58,890 Goodbye, Mr. 134 00:06:59,410 --> 00:07:00,410 Spatula! 135 00:07:01,270 --> 00:07:02,410 You're still amazing. 136 00:07:02,850 --> 00:07:03,850 You're amazing. 137 00:07:04,030 --> 00:07:05,510 Remember that trick with the dancing turkey? 138 00:07:05,790 --> 00:07:08,610 Oh, yeah. I still stay up nights trying to figure out how you did that. Yeah. 139 00:07:08,650 --> 00:07:12,190 First time I did that was on a telethon with Chuck Connors. 140 00:07:12,470 --> 00:07:13,890 The rifleman? Yeah. 141 00:07:14,150 --> 00:07:16,390 That guy got more tail than Eddie Fisher. 142 00:07:17,430 --> 00:07:18,430 Is that right? 143 00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:19,850 Whoa! Wait up! 144 00:07:22,670 --> 00:07:24,070 Oh, it sounds romantic. 145 00:07:24,310 --> 00:07:25,310 Well, it was romantic. 146 00:07:25,710 --> 00:07:27,590 Nick always knows just what to say. 147 00:07:28,140 --> 00:07:29,180 He's a writer for God's sake. 148 00:07:29,480 --> 00:07:33,720 I mean, it's like every time I start to drift away emotionally, he senses it, 149 00:07:33,780 --> 00:07:37,420 and he reels me back in. And then things get lousy again, and I drift, and then 150 00:07:37,420 --> 00:07:38,700 he reels me back in. 151 00:07:39,240 --> 00:07:42,100 I'm going to sue for emotional whiplash. I know a good lawyer. 152 00:07:42,500 --> 00:07:45,700 Okay, don't start with that again. Come on, Carol, you kissed the man. 153 00:07:45,920 --> 00:07:49,080 I mean, I know you. You don't kiss a guy for no reason. I explained this to you, 154 00:07:49,100 --> 00:07:50,500 Molly. It was a moment. A moment. 155 00:07:50,800 --> 00:07:54,060 Yes, I was feeling vulnerable about Nick. He was feeling vulnerable about 156 00:07:54,060 --> 00:07:56,340 wife. We looked into each other's eyes and it just, it happened. 157 00:07:56,540 --> 00:07:57,900 And then you invited him into your house. 158 00:07:58,160 --> 00:08:00,600 Well, yeah, it was part of the same moment, but a long moment. 159 00:08:00,880 --> 00:08:04,040 Yes, it was an extended moment. Okay, and what about when you kissed him two 160 00:08:04,040 --> 00:08:05,560 weeks ago and he bought a bowling alley? 161 00:08:06,490 --> 00:08:08,770 Actually, that was also a moment. 162 00:08:09,750 --> 00:08:10,750 I see. 163 00:08:10,970 --> 00:08:12,130 Here's the problem. 164 00:08:13,530 --> 00:08:14,530 Stuckyville's Dan revealed. 165 00:08:14,830 --> 00:08:17,110 He's showing the kids how my tricks are done. 166 00:08:17,670 --> 00:08:20,350 What about that whole brotherhood of magicians where no one ever reveals the 167 00:08:20,350 --> 00:08:21,810 secrets? Tell me about it. 168 00:08:22,150 --> 00:08:23,150 Huzzah! 169 00:08:26,350 --> 00:08:27,350 Whoa. 170 00:08:29,350 --> 00:08:30,370 Is that your card? 171 00:08:31,130 --> 00:08:34,010 I didn't pick a card. 172 00:08:40,650 --> 00:08:41,809 Honey, it's okay. Mommy's coming. 173 00:08:42,090 --> 00:08:43,090 Oh, honey. 174 00:08:44,070 --> 00:08:45,590 Sweetie. Sweetie. 175 00:08:45,950 --> 00:08:47,470 No, no, no. It's okay. 176 00:08:48,610 --> 00:08:50,910 Sweetie. She's a big girl. 177 00:08:51,970 --> 00:08:53,690 Honey, it's fine. Don't cry. 178 00:08:53,910 --> 00:08:54,849 Are you okay? 179 00:08:54,850 --> 00:08:57,390 Oh, yeah. She's fine. She's fine. It's okay. 180 00:08:57,690 --> 00:08:58,549 It's okay. 181 00:08:58,550 --> 00:09:00,530 Shh, shh, shh. All my bugs... 182 00:09:17,040 --> 00:09:19,900 different things I can claim. Unfair competition, violation of trade secrets, 183 00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:21,320 theft of intellectual property. 184 00:09:21,640 --> 00:09:25,260 But to be honest with you, it's going to be pretty hard for us to win. I've been 185 00:09:25,260 --> 00:09:27,200 doing this act for 53 years. 186 00:09:28,400 --> 00:09:29,400 I'll see what I can do. 187 00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:32,440 Look at you lawyering it up. Oh, you're late. 188 00:09:32,660 --> 00:09:34,980 Oh, my God. Do you know who this is? 189 00:09:36,600 --> 00:09:39,560 Stuckyville Stead. Oh, my God. This is a great pleasure, sir. This is great to 190 00:09:39,560 --> 00:09:41,600 me. Hey, what have you got in your ear? That's ridiculous. 191 00:09:41,900 --> 00:09:42,900 A spatula. 192 00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:45,460 Stuckyville Stead just pulled a spatula out of my ear. 193 00:09:50,760 --> 00:09:53,060 This is the same time I ran into her getting coffee last week. 194 00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:56,080 You know why there's a word for this? It's called docking. I think we might 195 00:09:56,080 --> 00:09:57,019 missed it. 196 00:09:57,020 --> 00:09:58,020 I'll give it a few more minutes. 197 00:10:02,980 --> 00:10:06,100 Hey, ten bucks if you give me out loud enough to make that old guy turn around. 198 00:10:37,420 --> 00:10:38,239 Hey, Carol. 199 00:10:38,240 --> 00:10:40,640 Molly. Carol. How you doing? 200 00:10:40,860 --> 00:10:42,660 Good. Really, really good. 201 00:10:42,900 --> 00:10:43,900 Good. 202 00:10:44,240 --> 00:10:45,560 You? Yeah, good. 203 00:10:46,160 --> 00:10:47,840 Good. Okay, I know. I'm good. 204 00:10:48,560 --> 00:10:51,680 Mike, for the love of God, are you good, too? Sure, I'm good. Well, what a 205 00:10:51,680 --> 00:10:52,680 relief. We're all good. 206 00:10:53,780 --> 00:10:56,080 Yeah, listen, I'm enlisting friends to come over to the bowling alley tomorrow 207 00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:59,840 night to hang out and help them paint the place. 208 00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:00,859 That, too. 209 00:11:00,860 --> 00:11:02,560 Yeah, it might be fun if you guys want to come over. 210 00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:05,660 You're also invited to the grand reopening of Stucky Bowl on Friday. 211 00:11:06,300 --> 00:11:07,300 Hey, babe. 212 00:11:22,410 --> 00:11:26,870 And, um, Ed Stevens, I think you know Nick Stanton. Hi, Mrs. Nick. 213 00:11:27,170 --> 00:11:28,170 How you doing? Good. 214 00:11:29,210 --> 00:11:32,410 Um, Ed just moved back into town. I believe he used to be one of your high 215 00:11:32,410 --> 00:11:34,270 school students. Yeah, I had you for sophomore English. 216 00:11:34,470 --> 00:11:37,610 Yeah, me too. I was, uh, I was in your class. You were the coolest teacher, 217 00:11:39,790 --> 00:11:40,930 I'm sorry, I don't remember you guys. 218 00:11:41,130 --> 00:11:42,290 I just remember the pretty girls. 219 00:11:44,610 --> 00:11:45,610 Um, 220 00:11:45,690 --> 00:11:47,710 we really should get going. Beth, I think we should. 221 00:11:48,150 --> 00:11:50,170 Wait, you're that bowling alley lawyer, right? 222 00:11:50,470 --> 00:11:51,650 People have been talking about that. 223 00:11:52,120 --> 00:11:53,940 Actually, I'm a lawyer, and I bought a bowling alley. 224 00:11:54,280 --> 00:11:56,000 Two separate ones. This is fascinating. 225 00:11:56,340 --> 00:12:00,240 I'm thinking about writing about a lawyer. What makes a lawyer decide to 226 00:12:00,240 --> 00:12:01,240 bowling alley? 227 00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:07,120 Well, I... needed a change. 228 00:12:08,460 --> 00:12:09,480 Pretty big change. 229 00:12:09,740 --> 00:12:10,800 Yeah. Yeah. 230 00:12:12,180 --> 00:12:16,020 To be honest with you, there was one other pretty big factor involved in my 231 00:12:16,020 --> 00:12:18,640 decision. Okay, you know, I've got to get back to my class now, honey. Hold on 232 00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:19,640 sec, babe. This is research. 233 00:12:20,300 --> 00:12:23,620 So what was that big factor that made a lawyer buy a bowling alley? 234 00:12:23,920 --> 00:12:25,720 You really want to know? I really do. Yeah. 235 00:12:26,760 --> 00:12:31,600 Well, this might sound strange, but since you asked, I will go ahead and 236 00:12:31,600 --> 00:12:32,600 you. 237 00:12:33,980 --> 00:12:35,340 My wife slept with a mailman. 238 00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:38,180 So you bought a bowling alley? 239 00:12:38,400 --> 00:12:39,400 I'm a complicated man. 240 00:12:54,540 --> 00:12:55,540 Shirley. 241 00:12:58,240 --> 00:12:59,580 I finished the S. 242 00:13:00,120 --> 00:13:01,560 Oh. Okay. 243 00:13:01,940 --> 00:13:02,940 Great. 244 00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:11,620 Do you want me to come see it? 245 00:13:15,120 --> 00:13:16,220 Okay. Okay. 246 00:13:20,260 --> 00:13:23,680 I want you to experience the S all at once. 247 00:13:33,100 --> 00:13:37,260 Okay. Shirley, this is great. This is better than great. It's perfect. 248 00:13:37,500 --> 00:13:38,500 It's perfect. 249 00:13:38,640 --> 00:13:39,640 Are you hitting on me? 250 00:13:39,820 --> 00:13:41,820 What? No, of course not. 251 00:13:42,640 --> 00:13:44,200 Because this is how it started with Dick Knight. 252 00:13:48,760 --> 00:13:51,500 So, Mike, I'm thinking about Carol Vesey today, and I came up with a theory on 253 00:13:51,500 --> 00:13:53,280 women. Hit me it. You know what women are? 254 00:13:53,880 --> 00:13:54,880 What's that? Fancy men. 255 00:13:55,700 --> 00:13:57,240 Women are just fancy men, you know what I mean? 256 00:13:57,480 --> 00:14:00,980 You start with a man, add a bunch of interesting bells and whistles, you got 257 00:14:00,980 --> 00:14:03,500 woman. That's exactly what they teach you in medical school. 258 00:14:04,460 --> 00:14:05,840 Hey, Nance. Hey. Hey. 259 00:14:06,440 --> 00:14:09,860 You know, I was just thinking, we are so lucky to have that Kendra as a nanny. 260 00:14:09,880 --> 00:14:10,880 She is great. 261 00:14:11,080 --> 00:14:14,620 She's sweet, and she's bright, and she loves Sarah. 262 00:14:15,160 --> 00:14:17,960 I mean, so many people have such nightmare stories about their nannies, 263 00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:19,340 were so, so lucky. 264 00:14:19,620 --> 00:14:20,780 Honey, what's the matter with Kendra? 265 00:14:21,120 --> 00:14:23,220 Mike, you're not listening to me. I'm saying that she's great. I think we're 266 00:14:23,220 --> 00:14:24,220 really lucky to have her. 267 00:14:24,460 --> 00:14:25,259 I do. 268 00:14:25,260 --> 00:14:27,740 Nancy, you and I have known each other since we were 12. We've been dating 269 00:14:27,740 --> 00:14:28,740 we were 17. 270 00:14:29,040 --> 00:14:30,040 Do I need to continue? 271 00:14:30,460 --> 00:14:31,460 Okay. 272 00:14:31,540 --> 00:14:34,440 I think that Sarah likes the nanny more than she likes me. Well, hell, honey, I 273 00:14:34,440 --> 00:14:36,640 like the nanny more than I like you. She's kind of hot. Mike, I'm serious. 274 00:14:37,440 --> 00:14:40,420 You know, I'm off at work all day, and meanwhile, Kendra's here, and she's just 275 00:14:40,420 --> 00:14:42,780 smiling, and she's laughing, and she's singing her brains out. 276 00:14:43,100 --> 00:14:45,760 I mean, honey, if I were Sarah, I'd like the nanny more than me, too. 277 00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:47,600 It's really upsetting. 278 00:14:48,280 --> 00:14:49,280 Come here. 279 00:14:54,960 --> 00:14:56,440 Sarah does not like Kendra more than you. 280 00:14:56,860 --> 00:14:58,220 That baby adores you. 281 00:14:58,820 --> 00:15:00,160 You're the world's best mom. 282 00:15:01,240 --> 00:15:02,580 You're the world's best wife. 283 00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:04,580 I don't know. 284 00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:07,680 I'm so speedy. 285 00:15:11,500 --> 00:15:12,500 Okay. 286 00:15:12,980 --> 00:15:16,120 I'm going to go eat a cookie. 287 00:15:17,020 --> 00:15:18,240 You know, so you can do it. 288 00:15:18,660 --> 00:15:21,320 You want to have sex? Yep. It's not a leap year, is it? 289 00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:25,780 Oh, that was... Funny for you to say. 290 00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:29,840 Milky! 291 00:15:31,580 --> 00:15:32,580 Milky! 292 00:15:33,680 --> 00:15:34,900 Milky news! 293 00:15:36,020 --> 00:15:37,360 Right? Right. 294 00:15:37,900 --> 00:15:42,240 Wrong. I love that one. 295 00:15:42,580 --> 00:15:44,380 Now I'll ruin it forever. 296 00:15:45,140 --> 00:15:47,880 See, the milk stays in. 297 00:15:49,680 --> 00:15:52,460 That's what that masked moron is doing to me. 298 00:15:52,680 --> 00:15:55,220 It's okay. I'm going to try and make him stop by claiming that your tricks are 299 00:15:55,220 --> 00:15:56,840 what's called your intellectual property. 300 00:15:57,560 --> 00:15:58,560 Will that work? 301 00:15:59,560 --> 00:16:02,100 Well, I don't know. See, the problem is you don't actually own your tricks. No 302 00:16:02,100 --> 00:16:03,100 magician owns their tricks. 303 00:16:03,420 --> 00:16:08,040 In the old days, we would have settled things like this with a baseball bat and 304 00:16:08,040 --> 00:16:09,180 a sock full of quarters. 305 00:16:32,780 --> 00:16:34,180 So you're pouring salt on my floor? 306 00:16:34,540 --> 00:16:35,660 Yeah, check out the flow. 307 00:16:36,360 --> 00:16:37,360 Hey, 308 00:16:37,620 --> 00:16:38,680 there's a girl out there for you. 309 00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:40,800 A girl? 310 00:16:40,980 --> 00:16:42,680 Who? I didn't catch her name. 311 00:16:47,680 --> 00:16:49,880 Molly! You end up with a small talk, loser. 312 00:16:50,160 --> 00:16:52,340 I'm here to paint. You brought your own roller, I see. Very impressive. 313 00:16:52,860 --> 00:16:55,360 And I got you a little bowling alley warming gift. 314 00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:56,640 Oh, Molly. 315 00:16:58,840 --> 00:17:02,380 Yeah, a tiny bowling ball. Yeah, I think it's for the bowling alley executive. 316 00:17:02,680 --> 00:17:03,680 Talk about your niche market. 317 00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:06,440 I love it. Thank you, Mom. More free help has just arrived. 318 00:17:07,200 --> 00:17:08,319 Only here for the beer. 319 00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:09,720 Let's paint. Hey. 320 00:17:29,070 --> 00:17:30,070 Wanda 321 00:18:31,370 --> 00:18:32,370 Let's go outside. 322 00:18:35,990 --> 00:18:37,010 Ed, we need some rules. 323 00:18:37,530 --> 00:18:38,670 Rules? Yes, rules. 324 00:18:39,790 --> 00:18:41,370 Okay. I have a boyfriend. 325 00:18:43,290 --> 00:18:46,350 That's not a rule. That's a declarative sentence. Okay, I am serious. That 326 00:18:46,350 --> 00:18:48,470 little stunt that you pulled today outside the coffee shop is not... No, 327 00:18:48,850 --> 00:18:51,910 Your boyfriend is trying to reduce my life to some kind of research project. 328 00:18:51,910 --> 00:18:54,810 you were the one who decided not to come into my house, so... 329 00:18:55,650 --> 00:18:57,990 Notice we're starting to jump around here a little bit. I've been going out 330 00:18:57,990 --> 00:18:59,410 Nick Stanton for seven years. 331 00:18:59,630 --> 00:19:02,450 Still jumping. What do you expect me to do? May I tell you what I think? Please. 332 00:19:02,610 --> 00:19:04,330 Okay. Girl goes out with boy a long time. 333 00:19:04,750 --> 00:19:07,830 Girl not totally happy with boy. Girl tries to convince herself she's happy 334 00:19:07,830 --> 00:19:09,030 boy. New boy comes. 335 00:19:09,430 --> 00:19:11,170 Girl decides... You know what? 336 00:19:11,570 --> 00:19:14,010 It's kind of hard to keep talking like this. What I'm trying to say, Carol, is 337 00:19:14,010 --> 00:19:16,010 that I think that you... No, I think I understand what you're trying to say. 338 00:19:16,410 --> 00:19:19,950 Ever since you swaggered into town and turned my whole life upside down, I 339 00:19:19,950 --> 00:19:23,490 possibly continue going out with Nick Stanton because of your incredible 340 00:19:24,230 --> 00:19:25,230 Is that true? 341 00:19:25,260 --> 00:19:26,580 Oh, my God. No. 342 00:19:26,860 --> 00:19:27,860 No. 343 00:19:27,940 --> 00:19:28,940 Oh. 344 00:19:29,580 --> 00:19:30,580 Oh. 345 00:19:32,500 --> 00:19:33,500 Carol. 346 00:19:34,700 --> 00:19:36,520 That was me on your doorstep the other night. 347 00:19:38,120 --> 00:19:39,120 I was there. 348 00:19:39,440 --> 00:19:40,560 That wasn't just a kiss. 349 00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:41,920 You know it. 350 00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:44,200 I know it. 351 00:19:47,120 --> 00:19:48,120 That was a moment. 352 00:19:49,240 --> 00:19:50,240 You bet it was. 353 00:19:54,670 --> 00:19:56,330 Oh, my God, it's Stuckyville Stan. 354 00:19:57,530 --> 00:20:01,410 Stuckyville Stan, I had such a huge crush on you when I was little. You 355 00:20:01,410 --> 00:20:02,830 have a crush on me, young lady. 356 00:20:03,070 --> 00:20:06,110 You had a crush on the wonderful world of possibility. 357 00:20:08,770 --> 00:20:10,770 About court tomorrow, what shall I wear? 358 00:20:11,010 --> 00:20:13,090 You're Stuckyville Stan, dressed like Stuckyville Stan. 359 00:20:13,350 --> 00:20:17,670 Oh, you know, I used to write about you nonstop in my diary, including the time 360 00:20:17,670 --> 00:20:19,950 you missed my ninth birthday and left me brokenhearted. 361 00:20:20,590 --> 00:20:22,490 That's weird. You know, you missed my ninth birthday, too. 362 00:20:23,310 --> 00:20:25,210 Was that in 78? 363 00:20:25,450 --> 00:20:26,590 Uh, yeah. 364 00:20:26,790 --> 00:20:28,830 Yeah? Six months at Oakdale. 365 00:20:29,190 --> 00:20:31,810 Fell a little too in love with my back medication. 366 00:20:32,550 --> 00:20:33,550 Yeah. 367 00:20:34,490 --> 00:20:35,750 Catch the movie! 368 00:20:42,170 --> 00:20:44,230 Ha ha! I got you. 369 00:20:44,990 --> 00:20:45,990 He did. 370 00:20:46,170 --> 00:20:47,830 For two EJB. 371 00:20:49,950 --> 00:20:50,950 Sir. 372 00:20:51,939 --> 00:20:53,300 You're going to have to take off that mask. 373 00:20:54,560 --> 00:20:56,060 I cannot, Your Honor. 374 00:20:56,280 --> 00:20:57,179 Why not? 375 00:20:57,180 --> 00:20:59,700 For fear of revealing my true identity. 376 00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:02,440 I've got your name right here on the docket, Howard Pitchell. 377 00:21:02,640 --> 00:21:03,760 Now take off the mask. 378 00:21:08,180 --> 00:21:09,180 Thank you. 379 00:21:09,320 --> 00:21:10,340 You're welcome, Your Honor. 380 00:21:10,800 --> 00:21:15,080 Now, before we begin, I'd like to say what a thrill it is to have Stuckerville 381 00:21:15,080 --> 00:21:16,160 stand here in my courtroom. 382 00:21:16,780 --> 00:21:18,780 It's magical to be here, Your Honor. 383 00:21:28,260 --> 00:21:33,160 Mr. Pistle, before you started doing Stuckyville Stand Revealed, did you work 384 00:21:33,160 --> 00:21:34,340 a regular magician at kids' parties? 385 00:21:34,600 --> 00:21:35,479 Yes, sir, I did. 386 00:21:35,480 --> 00:21:36,379 And were you successful? 387 00:21:36,380 --> 00:21:37,239 I did all right. 388 00:21:37,240 --> 00:21:40,440 All right. Really? Interesting. Because I subpoenaed your office records, and I 389 00:21:40,440 --> 00:21:42,700 found out you'd only worked twice in six months. 390 00:21:43,240 --> 00:21:46,300 Uh, well, yeah, but at one point I had mono. 391 00:21:46,660 --> 00:21:51,920 Mr. Pistle, when you go to bed at night, do you have a feeling way down deep 392 00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:54,720 inside that stealing Stuckyville Stand's tricks and revealing how they're done 393 00:21:54,720 --> 00:21:55,720 is wrong? 394 00:21:55,820 --> 00:21:56,820 Objection! 395 00:21:57,020 --> 00:21:59,880 Whether it's right or wrong is not relevant. 396 00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:01,400 Not relevant. 397 00:22:01,740 --> 00:22:05,140 Not relevant. Whether it's right or wrong is not relevant. Why'd they put up 398 00:22:05,140 --> 00:22:06,680 this big building with all the old paneling? 399 00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:08,280 I'll allow it. 400 00:22:09,220 --> 00:22:10,220 Thank you. 401 00:22:13,060 --> 00:22:16,980 Pistol? No, sir. I do not think there's anything wrong with what I'm doing. 402 00:22:17,400 --> 00:22:18,800 Nothing at all? Nothing at all. 403 00:22:19,540 --> 00:22:20,540 I see. 404 00:22:20,820 --> 00:22:22,480 Then why in the world do you wear a mask? 405 00:22:27,109 --> 00:22:28,109 It's stylish. 406 00:22:29,810 --> 00:22:30,810 Thank you. 407 00:22:37,190 --> 00:22:38,870 Uh, you work here? 408 00:22:39,390 --> 00:22:40,390 I'm looking for Mr. 409 00:22:40,810 --> 00:22:44,270 Chartremond. I'm the owner, actually, but I don't know anyone by that name. I 410 00:22:44,270 --> 00:22:45,410 Monsieur Chartremond. 411 00:22:48,570 --> 00:22:52,230 I thought your last name was Stubbs. It is, but the French thing gives me a 412 00:22:52,230 --> 00:22:53,710 business edge. It keeps him confused. 413 00:22:55,340 --> 00:22:56,039 right this way. 414 00:22:56,040 --> 00:22:57,340 Okay. Ed. 415 00:22:57,660 --> 00:22:58,660 Hi. 416 00:23:00,340 --> 00:23:01,340 Shirley. 417 00:23:01,600 --> 00:23:02,600 We're out of paint. 418 00:23:04,100 --> 00:23:05,100 Well, that's okay. 419 00:23:05,780 --> 00:23:06,780 We'll just get some more. 420 00:23:07,040 --> 00:23:08,040 Okay. Okay. 421 00:23:16,080 --> 00:23:18,400 I have a very strange staff. 422 00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:33,800 Sarah loves you, honey. 423 00:23:39,360 --> 00:23:40,580 Congratulations, Bert. 424 00:23:40,820 --> 00:23:44,060 In a world of survival of the fittest, you have survived. 425 00:23:45,400 --> 00:23:48,240 I'm buying from you, and I am ready to talk the P word. 426 00:23:49,100 --> 00:23:50,100 Price. 427 00:23:50,500 --> 00:23:51,500 My name's not Bert. 428 00:23:53,680 --> 00:23:55,340 I've written a number down on this piece of paper. 429 00:23:55,660 --> 00:23:58,740 I want you to look at that number. I don't want you to say anything about the 430 00:23:58,740 --> 00:24:00,800 number. I don't want you to react to the number. 431 00:24:01,400 --> 00:24:03,480 I just want you to digest the number. 432 00:24:08,840 --> 00:24:09,840 17. 433 00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:11,540 What does that even mean? 434 00:24:11,780 --> 00:24:13,560 Shh. Say nothing. 435 00:24:14,020 --> 00:24:15,020 Don't react. 436 00:24:21,060 --> 00:24:22,060 Hiya, kids. 437 00:24:22,460 --> 00:24:25,760 Welcome to the wonderful world of possibility. 438 00:24:27,760 --> 00:24:30,420 Now, follow my hand. 439 00:24:30,970 --> 00:24:34,510 As I reach into the hat. What is this I see? 440 00:24:34,970 --> 00:24:37,070 Oh, is that a bunny rabbit? 441 00:24:37,270 --> 00:24:39,050 I can't believe my eyes. 442 00:24:39,270 --> 00:24:40,830 That hat is a false bottom. 443 00:24:41,090 --> 00:24:42,090 You suck. 444 00:24:43,450 --> 00:24:44,450 Okay, 445 00:24:45,750 --> 00:24:49,170 Ed, Ed, you cannot let this go on anymore. I mean, Stuckyville stands 446 00:24:49,170 --> 00:24:50,830 an institution in this town. I know. 447 00:24:51,290 --> 00:24:52,330 We're bombing, Stanley. 448 00:24:52,770 --> 00:24:53,770 Maybe that's it. 449 00:24:54,250 --> 00:24:55,250 What? 450 00:24:56,750 --> 00:24:58,990 Stuckyville stands in doing the same act for 53 years. 451 00:25:00,360 --> 00:25:01,360 That's winter shot. 452 00:25:02,060 --> 00:25:03,180 You're horrible! 453 00:25:03,900 --> 00:25:05,880 You're not magic! 454 00:25:11,160 --> 00:25:12,160 That's enough. 455 00:25:12,880 --> 00:25:16,640 Stucky, though, Stan, before Mr. Pistol started revealing your tricks, had your 456 00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:17,740 act ever gone over so poorly? 457 00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:20,240 Never. It was a nightmare. 458 00:25:20,600 --> 00:25:23,520 A Norwegian kid hit me in the head with a pop -tart. 459 00:25:24,260 --> 00:25:25,640 How long have you owned all of this? 460 00:25:26,020 --> 00:25:28,280 Objection! Assuming facts, not an evidence. 461 00:25:28,680 --> 00:25:32,540 The court has already determined that Stuckyville Stan owns no copyright on 462 00:25:32,540 --> 00:25:33,540 of his tricks. 463 00:25:33,660 --> 00:25:36,240 That's true, Mr. Stevens. You'll have to rephrase the question so that it 464 00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:38,180 doesn't assume that Stuckyville Stan owns his tricks. 465 00:25:38,460 --> 00:25:39,820 I'm terribly sorry if I was unclear. 466 00:25:40,160 --> 00:25:43,140 I wasn't asking him about owning his tricks. No magician owns their tricks. 467 00:25:43,480 --> 00:25:46,900 What I asked him was how long he'd owned all of this. Meaning the cape, the 468 00:25:46,900 --> 00:25:50,380 music, the phrase, welcome to the world of possibility. I'm asking him how long 469 00:25:50,380 --> 00:25:53,000 he's owned his act. I object to that assumption, too. 470 00:25:53,300 --> 00:25:56,580 It has never been determined that he owns the copyrights on his act, either. 471 00:25:56,700 --> 00:26:00,100 Your Honor, Stuckyville Stan has been doing the same act for 53 years. He 472 00:26:00,100 --> 00:26:02,020 created it. He is synonymous with his act. 473 00:26:02,280 --> 00:26:05,120 Copyright or no copyright, I contend that he owns it, and furthermore, that 474 00:26:05,120 --> 00:26:07,500 qualifies as his intellectual property. 475 00:26:07,820 --> 00:26:08,820 Objection again. 476 00:26:09,060 --> 00:26:13,060 How do I know that Stuckyville Stan has been performing the same act for the 477 00:26:13,060 --> 00:26:14,180 past 53 years? 478 00:26:14,500 --> 00:26:18,180 Mr. Stevens is making bold, unproven statements. 479 00:26:18,540 --> 00:26:20,080 He is not asking questions. 480 00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:23,480 Your Honor, I promise, if he ever stops talking, I'll ask questions. 481 00:26:23,920 --> 00:26:25,220 You stop talking. 482 00:26:26,320 --> 00:26:27,380 You ask questions. 483 00:26:27,720 --> 00:26:28,720 Thank you, Your Honor. 484 00:26:28,780 --> 00:26:30,320 Let's begin with the one person who should know. 485 00:26:30,940 --> 00:26:34,180 Stuckyville Stan is the act that we have just seen on today's videotape, more or 486 00:26:34,180 --> 00:26:37,900 less the same act that you created and have been doing for the last 53 years. 487 00:26:37,900 --> 00:26:38,900 sure is. 488 00:26:40,360 --> 00:26:41,360 Thank you. 489 00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:53,980 Now, 53 years is a long time ago, isn't it? It is. Believe me, I remember. 490 00:26:54,670 --> 00:26:55,990 Are you a football fan? 491 00:26:56,330 --> 00:26:57,330 Yes, I am. 492 00:26:57,810 --> 00:26:59,730 Who won the Super Bowl last year? 493 00:27:05,130 --> 00:27:07,950 I always have trouble with that one, too. 494 00:27:08,610 --> 00:27:10,330 Nothing further at this time, Your Honor. 495 00:27:21,170 --> 00:27:23,170 Hey, girl, how you doing? Hello, Ed. 496 00:27:23,630 --> 00:27:24,630 Are we fighting? 497 00:27:24,750 --> 00:27:26,170 I'm not sure we might be. 498 00:27:26,630 --> 00:27:29,110 That's a bummer. Listen, can I ask you a question? Do you still have that diary? 499 00:27:29,410 --> 00:27:30,249 What diary? 500 00:27:30,250 --> 00:27:32,850 The other night you said you wrote about Stuckyville Stan in a diary, a 501 00:27:32,850 --> 00:27:34,110 childhood diary. You still have that? 502 00:27:34,350 --> 00:27:35,530 Yeah, sure, somewhere. Why? 503 00:27:36,010 --> 00:27:37,670 You think I could borrow it? I think it might help. 504 00:27:37,910 --> 00:27:39,230 Well, if it'll help, of course. 505 00:27:39,570 --> 00:27:41,790 Excellent. Listen, I'll see you tonight, 8 o 'clock at the bowling alley. To 506 00:27:41,790 --> 00:27:43,090 prepare. To prepare what? 507 00:27:43,290 --> 00:27:44,290 Your testimony. 508 00:27:44,470 --> 00:27:45,470 I'm putting you on the stand. 509 00:27:47,490 --> 00:27:48,490 What? 510 00:28:06,860 --> 00:28:09,560 Welcome to the law offices of Stevens, Stevens, and Stevens. 511 00:28:09,760 --> 00:28:10,579 I'm Stevens. 512 00:28:10,580 --> 00:28:13,580 So this is it, the nerve center. 513 00:28:14,140 --> 00:28:15,820 Yeah, pardon the mess. 514 00:28:16,080 --> 00:28:17,640 Lovely parting gifts for my marriage. 515 00:28:20,840 --> 00:28:22,940 Oh, the spatula. 516 00:28:24,340 --> 00:28:26,800 It's funny, I was going through a bunch of my stuff the other day, you know, 517 00:28:26,840 --> 00:28:29,660 like old pictures of me and Liz, wedding gifts, that kind of stuff. Nothing got 518 00:28:29,660 --> 00:28:30,619 to me, nothing. 519 00:28:30,620 --> 00:28:34,120 And then I came upon this spatula and... 520 00:28:36,650 --> 00:28:38,030 It's funny, the whole thing is a spatula. 521 00:28:38,590 --> 00:28:39,590 You know, you believe that? 522 00:28:41,290 --> 00:28:43,690 Is it, um, is it special? 523 00:28:44,110 --> 00:28:51,110 No, well, um... When Liz and I were married, we moved into this tiny, 524 00:28:51,250 --> 00:28:54,890 tiny apartment, and the first morning that we woke up, you know, sleeping on 525 00:28:54,890 --> 00:28:59,430 floor, boxes everywhere, and I went to the corner store, and I bought this 526 00:28:59,430 --> 00:29:00,430 spatula. 527 00:29:00,690 --> 00:29:05,450 And I came home, and I made her scrambled eggs. 528 00:29:13,230 --> 00:29:14,730 The, uh, the diary. 529 00:29:16,510 --> 00:29:18,010 I have it right here. 530 00:29:21,730 --> 00:29:26,090 May I see it? Well, no. You see, Ed, because it's my diary. 531 00:29:26,810 --> 00:29:28,550 Yeah, from when you were, what, eight? 532 00:29:28,870 --> 00:29:32,810 You will note that I have marked the passages pertaining to Stuckyville 533 00:29:32,830 --> 00:29:34,030 and you may see those. 534 00:29:34,290 --> 00:29:35,950 Okay. And only those. 535 00:29:37,010 --> 00:29:38,010 Okay. 536 00:29:54,030 --> 00:29:55,770 Quite a lot of detail, such a little kid. 537 00:29:59,210 --> 00:30:00,210 What's this? 538 00:30:01,130 --> 00:30:02,150 C .V. loves B .V. 539 00:30:02,750 --> 00:30:07,230 You turn the page. You cannot turn the page. I just want to know who B .V. is. 540 00:30:07,230 --> 00:30:08,230 .V. 541 00:30:08,490 --> 00:30:13,450 just so happens to have been the object of a typical schoolgirl crush, as he was 542 00:30:13,450 --> 00:30:14,530 for many girls my age. 543 00:30:15,410 --> 00:30:16,410 So, 544 00:30:16,710 --> 00:30:17,870 B .V. is somebody famous? 545 00:30:18,710 --> 00:30:21,590 I'm not going to tell you, so you may as well give it up. Oh, come on. No. 546 00:30:21,670 --> 00:30:23,590 Please? No. Please? No. Come on. 547 00:30:23,870 --> 00:30:26,070 No. I promise I won't laugh. No. Please? 548 00:30:26,530 --> 00:30:28,470 And this kind of thing will drive me crazy. 549 00:30:28,670 --> 00:30:30,650 Well, that won't be a very long drive for you. 550 00:30:30,890 --> 00:30:31,890 Boris Becker. 551 00:30:34,410 --> 00:30:35,410 Boris Becker. 552 00:30:40,010 --> 00:30:42,350 Who's a good girl? Who's a good little girl? 553 00:30:42,950 --> 00:30:45,330 You love Mommy, don't you, Sarah? 554 00:30:46,150 --> 00:30:47,150 Of course you do. 555 00:30:47,270 --> 00:30:48,270 Of course you do. 556 00:30:54,640 --> 00:31:01,520 ready to go outside your 557 00:31:01,520 --> 00:31:02,520 door 558 00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:56,240 Miss Bessie, did my client ever perform for you? 559 00:31:56,560 --> 00:32:01,800 Yes, he did. He performed at my 6th, 7th, 8th, and 10th birthday parties. We 560 00:32:01,800 --> 00:32:02,900 loved Stuckyville Stan. 561 00:32:03,140 --> 00:32:04,640 And what's his act of fame each year? 562 00:32:04,940 --> 00:32:08,720 Oh, yes. We all knew it by heart. He always started by saying, Welcome to the 563 00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:09,860 world of possibility. 564 00:32:11,260 --> 00:32:15,100 And then he ended with the dancing turkey trick. Your Honor, I would like 565 00:32:15,100 --> 00:32:18,900 submit into evidence Miss Bessie's 1979 childhood diary, which describes each of 566 00:32:18,900 --> 00:32:20,620 Stuckyville Stan's performances in great detail. 567 00:32:20,980 --> 00:32:21,980 Objection. 568 00:32:22,270 --> 00:32:25,230 A child's diary is totally unreliable. 569 00:32:25,870 --> 00:32:26,870 Overruled. Let me see it. 570 00:32:28,030 --> 00:32:30,450 If you look at the marked portions, you'll see that the act he performed, 571 00:32:30,570 --> 00:32:33,110 including the types of tricks and the order the tricks were performed in, was 572 00:32:33,110 --> 00:32:37,370 the same each year. Moreover, the act described in Miss Bessie's diary is the 573 00:32:37,370 --> 00:32:39,190 same as the one seen in yesterday's videotape. 574 00:32:40,350 --> 00:32:41,350 Thank you, Miss Bessie. 575 00:32:43,590 --> 00:32:44,590 Ashley. 576 00:32:46,430 --> 00:32:47,430 No. 577 00:32:48,290 --> 00:32:49,290 One more thing. 578 00:32:50,670 --> 00:32:54,510 Miss Bessie, in your diary, the initials B .V. appear. 579 00:32:55,150 --> 00:32:56,990 Could you tell the court what these initials stand for? 580 00:32:59,970 --> 00:33:00,970 Miss Bessie. 581 00:33:01,150 --> 00:33:03,590 Objection. You can't object, young lady. That's his job. 582 00:33:05,290 --> 00:33:06,290 Miss Bessie. 583 00:33:10,510 --> 00:33:11,910 I'm sorry, Miss Bessie. Cannot hear you. 584 00:33:13,270 --> 00:33:14,670 Ben Vereen. 585 00:33:15,070 --> 00:33:16,070 Ben. 586 00:33:17,330 --> 00:33:18,330 You're kidding me. 587 00:33:27,680 --> 00:33:28,880 I'm sorry. 588 00:33:46,340 --> 00:33:49,640 What did you do? We do not need this many salt and pepper shakers. I bought 589 00:33:49,640 --> 00:33:51,000 bulk, and I got a hell of a price. 590 00:33:52,140 --> 00:33:53,580 Phil, this is ridiculous. 591 00:33:53,960 --> 00:33:54,960 Phil, listen to me. 592 00:33:55,260 --> 00:33:59,060 A hundred sets in a stack that size, and we do not need that many salt and... 593 00:33:59,060 --> 00:34:00,980 Oh, my God. 594 00:34:03,340 --> 00:34:07,500 Phil, how many sets of salt and pepper shakes did you buy? 5 ,000. 595 00:34:10,000 --> 00:34:13,420 We do not need that many sets of salt and pepper shakers. Oh, no, but we do, 596 00:34:13,480 --> 00:34:15,620 man. People are going to be taking these things left and right as keepsakes. 597 00:34:15,699 --> 00:34:18,320 Hey, you don't think the guys who run Caesar's Palace know that when people 598 00:34:18,320 --> 00:34:20,860 check out, they're scarfing up an ashtray or two? They're budgeted for 599 00:34:21,159 --> 00:34:24,520 Phil, listen to me. I'm going to court now, and when I come back, there better 600 00:34:24,520 --> 00:34:26,960 not be an unreasonable amount of salt and pepper shakers, okay? 601 00:34:29,920 --> 00:34:30,920 Phil, 602 00:34:33,820 --> 00:34:35,120 that can hold us. 603 00:34:35,659 --> 00:34:36,659 That's it right there. 604 00:34:38,219 --> 00:34:41,409 A dancing turtle. I object to all of this. 605 00:34:41,630 --> 00:34:45,670 Now, what possible point can Mr. Stevens hope to prove by wasting the court's 606 00:34:45,670 --> 00:34:47,449 time with a magic show? 607 00:34:47,810 --> 00:34:52,130 Your Honor, the first time I saw Stuckyville Stan do the dancing turkey 608 00:34:52,130 --> 00:34:52,808 was six. 609 00:34:52,810 --> 00:34:55,949 And now, after all these years, I finally figured out how he does it. 610 00:34:55,949 --> 00:34:56,949 like to know how? 611 00:34:57,170 --> 00:34:58,170 I'll tell you how. 612 00:34:58,250 --> 00:35:02,330 He does it by taking us into the world of possibility where, as it turns out, 613 00:35:02,430 --> 00:35:03,710 turkeys can dance. 614 00:35:04,460 --> 00:35:07,760 Mr. Pistolsack seeks to destroy that world, and I'm here to protect it 615 00:35:07,760 --> 00:35:12,040 without the world of possibility, what do we have left? 616 00:35:14,440 --> 00:35:15,440 You know what? 617 00:35:15,820 --> 00:35:20,560 I concede that Stuckyville Stan takes us into this world of possibilities. 618 00:35:21,180 --> 00:35:22,180 It's irrelevant. 619 00:35:22,580 --> 00:35:24,220 Now, can we move on? 620 00:35:26,840 --> 00:35:28,120 Bring on the dancing turkey. 621 00:35:33,630 --> 00:35:36,210 do this trick, I will need an assistant. 622 00:35:36,570 --> 00:35:37,650 Ed, do you mind? 623 00:35:38,730 --> 00:35:39,730 Yes. 624 00:35:40,850 --> 00:35:43,770 You have to wear this cape. You have to look the part. 625 00:35:44,430 --> 00:35:50,710 Welcome to the wonderful world of 626 00:35:50,710 --> 00:35:51,710 possibilities. 627 00:35:52,410 --> 00:35:56,050 In your world, a turkey is a turkey. 628 00:35:56,550 --> 00:36:02,650 But in the world of possibilities, a turkey can rise up. 629 00:36:03,080 --> 00:36:04,080 And dance. 630 00:36:04,220 --> 00:36:06,340 Rise up and dance. 631 00:36:06,760 --> 00:36:07,760 Dance. 632 00:36:08,300 --> 00:36:09,300 Dance. 633 00:36:10,020 --> 00:36:11,680 Dance, turkey, dance. 634 00:36:12,300 --> 00:36:14,760 Rise up and dance. 635 00:36:15,360 --> 00:36:18,480 Dance! Rise up and dance! 636 00:36:18,960 --> 00:36:20,180 Dance, turkey! 637 00:36:20,480 --> 00:36:23,120 Dance! Dance for Stan! 638 00:36:23,840 --> 00:36:26,280 Dance! Dance for Stan! 639 00:36:26,780 --> 00:36:28,520 In two seconds, raise up your hands. 640 00:36:28,740 --> 00:36:31,260 Two, one, dance! 641 00:36:32,160 --> 00:36:33,680 Thank you. 642 00:37:02,600 --> 00:37:03,720 That doesn't really matter here. 643 00:37:04,240 --> 00:37:09,980 Mr. Stephen, your quest to protect the world of possibility is quite moving, 644 00:37:09,980 --> 00:37:11,140 it has nothing to do with the law. 645 00:37:11,780 --> 00:37:13,480 So let's get to the law. 646 00:37:13,800 --> 00:37:15,980 This case comes down to one question. 647 00:37:16,480 --> 00:37:21,380 Can Stuckyville Stan own his act without owning the tricks in his act? 648 00:37:22,020 --> 00:37:26,180 Based on the evidence that shows that he's been performing the same act for 649 00:37:26,180 --> 00:37:29,600 50 years, I believe the answer is yes. 650 00:37:30,700 --> 00:37:34,820 Therefore... The court orders Mr. Pistol to discontinue all operations 651 00:37:34,820 --> 00:37:38,060 pertaining to Stuckyville Stand revealed immediately. 652 00:37:41,180 --> 00:37:48,140 Here you go, my man. Have a good game. 653 00:37:48,140 --> 00:37:49,140 Here's your sports car. 654 00:37:49,300 --> 00:37:50,300 Take it easy. 655 00:38:16,430 --> 00:38:17,490 I reject the world of possibility. 656 00:38:17,850 --> 00:38:20,090 I must detect it. I beseech you. 657 00:38:20,630 --> 00:38:23,990 My name is Ed Stevens, and I love dancing turtles. 658 00:38:28,430 --> 00:38:29,430 Kenny. 659 00:38:31,610 --> 00:38:34,250 Kenny. Why do you keep doing that, cracking everybody up? 660 00:38:36,850 --> 00:38:37,850 All right. 661 00:38:42,650 --> 00:38:44,970 You look marvelous. 662 00:38:46,030 --> 00:38:52,550 And you know, darling, it's much better to look good than to feel good. 663 00:38:58,890 --> 00:38:59,890 Now. 664 00:39:03,290 --> 00:39:04,290 That's good. 665 00:39:27,450 --> 00:39:30,350 You know, Molly, things never work out the way you plan them. 666 00:39:30,750 --> 00:39:33,210 Oh, I wouldn't know. I live a charmed life. 667 00:39:34,450 --> 00:39:36,250 I honestly don't even know what I'm upset about. 668 00:39:36,710 --> 00:39:40,130 Well, I think you're upset because things never work out the way you plan 669 00:39:40,230 --> 00:39:41,230 Couldn't have said it better myself. 670 00:39:42,830 --> 00:39:44,710 You know what? Let's try this one on the first night. 671 00:39:45,960 --> 00:39:49,620 When you came back to Stuckyville for Carol Bessie, you didn't plan that she'd 672 00:39:49,620 --> 00:39:51,240 be in love with your old English teacher. 673 00:39:52,100 --> 00:39:57,160 And after you were amazing in court, you didn't plan that Carol Bessie would 674 00:39:57,160 --> 00:39:59,520 still be in love with your old English teacher. 675 00:40:01,500 --> 00:40:06,080 When you bought that spatula for your wife, you didn't plan that seven years 676 00:40:06,080 --> 00:40:08,940 later you'd be sitting here using it to hit tiny bowling ball. 677 00:40:10,300 --> 00:40:14,600 But that's what we humans do, Ed. You know, we plan it all out and then... 678 00:40:14,960 --> 00:40:16,520 Life just does whatever it wants. 679 00:40:17,160 --> 00:40:18,160 Yeah. 680 00:40:18,980 --> 00:40:21,340 Makes you wonder why we bother to plan it out in the first place. 681 00:40:21,960 --> 00:40:27,820 I think we do it to help us navigate the world of possibility. 682 00:40:30,740 --> 00:40:33,760 Either that or it's a really effective way to kill time. 52958

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.