Original subtitles

Previously on Dr. Quinn.

I believe you have a growth.

A routine exam uncovers a serious illness.

Might be cancer.

And a patient's fear leads to denial. This little lump is going to go away,

like all the others.

Bully, what should I do?

Dear God, take your stand.

Now, the only solution.

You can't take chances with this, it's serious.

May be too difficult to bear.

We remove the growth along with your brain.

But whatever the price, it's worth it to save your life.

And coming up tonight.

I don't need any more help or advice from Michaela. A painful decision.

My answer's no.

I can't accept that. Michaela, I said no.

Forces Dr.

Mike to face a heartbreaking truth. She's very possibly choosing death. Can

save a friend before it's too late? I love you, Dorothy, and I just, I don't

want to lose you. Don't miss the powerful conclusion.

I told Michaela I wasn't afraid to die.

I am not afraid.

Next.

Come on, Colleen, let's go. Come on.

Sully.

Good morning, Robert. Good morning.

Sully, could I speak to you?

More what I don't need.

I don't need any more help or advice from Michaela, but she's insistent on

You know how she can be.

She can be stubborn.

She means well.

But there's some things folks have to make their own decisions about.

I agree.

Would you talk to her for me and let her know that I appreciate the good

intentions, but...

I'd rather she'd leave it be.

I'll talk to her for you.

I haven't even told you what it is.

You don't need to.

What a pair the two of you make.

You go to the ends of the earth to help a person, and yet you're so different

from her.

You never push or pry.

You never fight your way into someone's trouble.

She tells me I may have cancer.

She says the only way to be sure is to do an operation.

But we'll... I'll lose... I'll lose a part of

myself.

And I'm not able to accept that.

Can you understand that?

What are you doing?

I don't want them.

Colleen!

Tell me what happened.

Boy at school.

He was making fun of me.

I see.

I'm... I'm bigger than all the other girls in class.

developing, that's all.

Girls grow at different rates. No, but I hate them.

Well, all girls don't like something about their appearance.

Did you?

My hair.

Your hair?

But it's so beautiful.

Well, I always thought that it was far too straight.

I would have given anything in the world to have had ringlets like Sadie Turner.

She was so popular.

Every night I used to wet my hair and wrap it around those little thread

that I found in my mother's sewing kit.

And I'd sleep like that.

And I'd wake up in the morning and go to breakfast.

And Margie would say, apparently a rat's made a nest in your hair.

But at least you had curls.

Only for about an hour.

By the time I got to school, it was as straight as a pin again.

I can't imagine you with curly hair.

And I can't imagine you being different from the way you are.

You may feel that you're developing too quickly now, but girls mature faster

than boys. Not other girls.

I feel like I'm the only one.

Well, those girls will catch up with you, and you'll catch up with yourself,

somehow it'll all even out.

would look in my eyes anymore.

They look one place.

They don't see me.

They don't see who I am.

Well, all boys go through a stage where

they're fascinated by certain things about a young lady.

Do they ever get back to liking all of you?

Most of us.

But it's up to you.

to let them see you as the whole person, the mind and the spirit.

I thought that new boy Jared was interested in my mind.

She was wrong.

Did... Did he do something inappropriate?

He tried.

Colleen! Don't worry.

I stopped him.

That's not the point.

I've got to talk to the reverend and to the boy's mother and... No, please.

Well, Colleen, we can't just leave this. Please, you'll only make it worse.

Well, something's got to be done.

Then let me do it.

You wasn't trying to get away from us, was you?

Good.

Because I... I brung you a little present from our ride

into Manitou.

See there?

A bottle.

It's very nice.

Well, it ain't just a bottle.

It's lilac water.

I know it can get kind of rough out here on the trail, and I figured you'd been

finding it kind of hard to feel, well, feminine.

So I thought maybe a little dash behind your ear

might perk you up a little bit.

Thank you.

Come on over here and take a whiff, little brother.

Under here, take a whiff.

Smells real nice. Don't it, though?

You know,

I didn't want to say nothing, but you was getting a little ripe there.

You know, I believe he was right for once.

It was a good idea keeping her with us.

In fact, I believe she might come in handy.

What for?

Well, cooking, for one.

I got me a hankering for some bacon and biscuits.

Yes, sir.

Do you think you could fry

us up some breakfast?

I could try.

What do you mean you could try?

I... I don't really cook.

You don't cook?

What kind of woman don't cook?

Carl, I'll fry us up some of that bacon.

I've been meaning to show you.

I got this nasty rip in my pants.

Maybe you could sew it for me.

I don't sew.

You can't cook.

You can't sew.

No wonder you ain't got a husband.

Hell, woman, what can you do?

I can cut hair.

You didn't tell me it was Dorothy.

How did you find out?

She told me.

Would that have made a difference to you in your advice to me?

Yes. Dorothy is your friend.

So I shouldn't recommend an operation because I know the person?

You told me to take a stand, and I did.

You take a stand, you give her a choice, and after she chooses, then you stop

being the doctor.

She's very possibly choosing death, Sally. Do you understand that?

It's still her choice.

Do you think this is easy for me?

Do you think I want to talk to my best friend like she's a stranger?

I would love to tell her that everything's going to be all right, but

afford that luxury.

Someone has got to give her the bad news. Someone has got to fight this

with her. Dorothy doesn't want to fight.

She's made peace with it.

Well, I don't want her to make peace with it.

I want her to live.

Dorothy, have you thought about our conversation?

I have.

My answer is no.

Then there's a good chance you may die.

If my time comes, then I'm ready. I'm not afraid.

My answer's no.

I can't accept that. Michaela, I said no!

Dorothy.

Dorothy.

Dorothy. Dorothy.

It's the middle of the night.

I made a decision, Dorothy.

I'm putting the store up for sale.

What?

First thing in the morning.

I'm going to wire that fellow from the railroad that wanted it before, and I'm

taking his best offer.

What made you decide such a thing?

I want to take you away.

I want to take that money and get on a train, just you and me, and ride it all

the way to New York City.

I'm going to bring you into one of them fancy stores you always read about in

them magazines of yours.

Buy you the...

prettiest, most expensive dress they got.

Some of them high -heeled shoes and a hat to match.

I want to get in a carriage and let it bring us right to the doorstep of the

York Times so you can see the biggest newspaper in the world.

Oh, Lauren.

Now, don't you dare argue with me.

I wish I could go, but I can't.

Please. It don't have to be.

You just tell me what you want, anything.

I can't go on living like I only got a little bit of time left.

I gotta live like I got all the time.

It's the only way.

You might be a bit thirsty.

I want to apologize for my brother.

I hope he didn't scare you none.

He ain't such a bad fella.

At least he didn't used to be.

See, all this just started out for fun.

We did a few little jobs. We made some easy money.

And I just went along with it because he's my big brother.

He's always smarter than me.

I figure he knew what he was doing.

But then he started wanting to rob more and more and taking big chances.

Now he's talking about killing folk.

I don't want to kill nobody.

He keeps saying we got to stick together because we're the only family we got.

But if he starts killing, I can't stick with him.

Today might be raining, but tomorrow, the sun's going to shine.

Go on.

Get out of here. Go on.

Go on. You're a nice lady. I don't want nothing bad to happen to you.

Go on.

Going home? Why not spend the night here?

I don't know how I brought it.

He was surrounded by my books.

That had been his instruments.

All the things that mattered to me.

You ever see what I am?

Sometimes I just... I just want to walk away from it all.

be Michaela, Dorothy's friend.

I want to cry with her and tell her how terrible this is.

I want to hold her hand.

Dorothy, you coming to the Sunday picnic?

No, no, I think I'll just stay here and do some writing.

Go on without me.

You'll be missed.

There you go.

Be right back.

About what?

Come on.

What do you want?

I want you to look at me.

What?

Look at me.

Look at me.

What's the matter with you? Are you crazy?

I'm not crazy.

I'm smart and nice and funny.

And I love school and learning.

great brothers and the best ma around.

And I dream about being a doctor someday.

But you'll never know all that.

Not the way you're going.

And that's all right.

Because if you don't care about those things, then I can do without you.

Only it makes me sad.

Because I thought you were nice.

I liked you.

I wanted to be friends.

Wait.

I do want to be friends.

Maybe when you grow up.

Please. Then we gotta start over.

You're on my calendar.

Bring that cousin.

Good morning, Dorothy.

Glad you could join us this fine day.

Isn't that sky just beautiful?

Yes, it is beautiful.

Dorothy?

Dorothy.

You gotta try some of my cider. I never had apples so sweet.

Here, taste.

The best sight he ever had in your life.

I believe it is grace.

Looking mighty nice today, Miss Dorothy.

And your red hair's shining real pretty in the sun.

Thank you, Robert E.

Hey,

Miss Dorothy!

Acorns. Sly says if I plant one, it'll grow to be as big as that oak.

Oh, none of us will live to see it get that big, Brian.

That oak's a hundred years old.

Oh.

Miss Dorothy says there's no use in planting it.

She says none of us will get to see it grow that big.

Brian, you must plant it.

Because by next year, it'll have grown up to your knees, and a year after that,

it'll be taller than you.

And then when it's time to go courting, you can take your young lady for a

picnic under it.

And then when you have children, they can build a treehouse in it.

And then someday you can tell your grandchildren how you planted it.

And when that tree gets to be 100, it doesn't matter that you're not here to

it.

All that matters is the day.

Today you held a hundred years in your hand.

Sully, will you help me?

You got something to dig with?

This thing?

Got a spot picked out?

I thought maybe over by the creek.

I have to tell you something.

I want you to know that I'm your friend first.

And whatever your decision is, I'll respect it.

I was only pushing you because... Well...

I have to selfishly... I love you, Dorothy,

and I just... I don't want to lose you.

Does time figure into this operation?

For its reason to believe that every minute counts.

Then let's do it. Now.

Now? Yes.

I'm worried about Miss Dorothy.

Brian, she's going to be just fine.

I thought she was really scared of the operation.

I don't know. I don't think it's the operation.

I think she trusts Dr. Mike.

Then what is it?

I think she's afraid she won't be pretty anymore.

I think she's the prettiest lady in town next to Ma.

You be sure you tell her that.

Go on.

I love that woman.

I always have.

I'd always find her as beautiful.

The first day I saw her.

She needs to know that.

She will.

See it in your eyes.

Lauren?

Would you like to come sit with me?

Madam, ma 'am.

Thank you for being here today, Colleen.

Difficult what I had to do.

It helped me to have you by my side.

I know it must have been very difficult for you, too.

It ain't that.

It's just that I feel so selfish.

Here I've been going on all week about my problem, and look what Miss Dorothy

had to go through.

You don't have to compare yourself to Dorothy.

You don't have to compare yourself to anyone.

You feel what you feel, and...

And that's never wrong or insignificant.

I can't help it.

I just wish I could do something for her.

Well, you can.

It's more than anything.

I'm here.

Jake? What's going on?

Mr. Ortzie had an operation.

What kind of operation?

Some kind of tumor. Dr. Mike had to take it out.

I didn't know.

I didn't know he had an operation.

How could you?

You weren't anywhere around.

I know what you must be thinking.

That you've been passed out drunk somewhere?

Why would I think that?

Just because the whole town does?

I guess they got a right to how I did it before.

That's what the whole time was, but I'm thinking I wanted to know about it.

I was... I was kidnapped by outlaws.

Uh... Well... At

least that's original.

No, no.

I really was.

By those fellas that were at the saloon. I know it sounds crazy.

You don't have to believe me.

I come here to tell you... I'm sorry, Dorothy.

I'm sorry I wasn't around when you needed me.

Do you know what happened to me?

The tumor was in my breast.

It couldn't be saved.

Does that

make you feel different about

me, Jake?

I told Michaela I wasn't afraid to die, but I was.

Jake, where the hell have you been the last three days?

You wouldn't believe me if I told you.

It's terrible what happened with you.

Well, she's alive.

That's all that matters.

She's not herself.

She's, you know.

No, I don't know.

She ain't normal no more.

Come on, Lauren, don't tell me you don't think about it.

It's just gonna take some getting used to.

Well, I don't know if I can ever get used to it.

I keep thinking about it.

You didn't say that to her.

Of course I didn't.

What did you say?

I told her she'd look just fine.

And you're a liar.

I wanted to spare her.

You wanted to spare yourself.

Was I supposed to hurt her feelings? I mean, what should I have said? It don't

matter what you said, since you didn't mean it.

You ought to let her be. You ought to quit courting her. Well, maybe I ain't

ready to quit courting her.

She needs to know she can't count on you.

I want her to be able to count on me. I just... Well, that ain't good enough.

She deserves better.

Fine.

You go tell her.

Go on, Lauren. Tell her what a phony I am. Then you can have her all to

yourself.

Maybe I will.

Did you see Jake downstairs?

Yes, I did.

What did he say?

Did he say anything?

He said... He said... You look beautiful.

Did he really say that?

Oh, yes.

That's what he said.

Hey, Barber. I'm closed.

Well, that's all right. I'm looking for someone.

A woman.

Her name's Jane.

She's kind of tall.

Curly little ringlet.

And smells like lilac.

I don't know any Jane.

Well,

somebody will.

I'll find her.

Sorry to trouble you.

He looks familiar.

I don't know anything.

No, you definitely look familiar.

That's funny.

Because I was just thinking, he looks familiar.

Wait a minute. He's a friend of mine from Soda Springs. That's where he is,

Hank. He probably saw him having a drink with me at the saloon.

Jack, I was about to give him a shave.

You've got to come back later.

I don't know why you've done that, mister.

I believe I'll take you up on that shave.

I don't often gutsy up for a lady, but this one?

She's worth it.

Miss Dorothy?

Oh, Colleen.

I didn't want to disturb you.

It's all right.

I brought you these.

Just wanted you to know I was thinking about you.

Thank you.

They're so pretty.

If there's anything you need, anything at all, you just let me know.

Because there's nothing I wouldn't do for you, Miss Dorothy.

Can't you change your bandages?

Now you can close your eyes or... or you can just turn away.

I want to look.

I want to see myself. I need to see myself.

Dorothy, I must advise against this.

Michaela. Perhaps in a few weeks when you've healed more.

Everyone's been reassuring me that I look just fine to them.

When it comes right down to it, there's just one person who needs to believe it.

Me.

Now, I'd like a mirror and some privacy.

As your doctor, I'll respect your wishes.

But as your friend, I won't leave you alone.

I'll always love you no matter what happens.

I'll always find you beautiful.