Original subtitles

How long are we going to be stuck in this stupid elevator?

I don't know.

But while we're here, we might as well do what everyone does when they're stuck

in elevators.

Think back about hilarious memories?

Exactly. Okay, I'll start.

Remember that time we went to Hawaii and our family got cursed by the...

Look at that.

Guess we don't have to spend any time sitting around remembering things now.

Good. Right?

What the dust?

Eh, probably just some mole people.

Hmm? Probably just some mole people.

Mole people aren't real.

Yeah, they are. They were at our house. Shut up. You don't remember this? They

were. I'm serious.

Mole people are everywhere.

You moles gotta get out of here.

Oh, too late. Yeah.

Time to mash up some guacamole.

Another grandmother!

All right, okay, okay.

Fine, you're just sleep texting, okay? Right this way. I love you. Goodbye.

How did I miss that?

You were sleep texting.

What else did I miss?

When you were sleep texting?

No, before I found out you were Kid Danger. What else did I miss? Uh, you

a lot.

Tell me everything.

Shall we?

Let's blow some bubbles and fight some crime.

a load of frozen yogurt. Give me a second. Good morning to you. Good

you.

Hello,

spine jerker.

Game on, Captain Man.

I'm still alive. I'm surprised Mom and Dad never found out.

Well, Piper, I'm pretty good at lying.

Can we talk about this later?

Please? Like when I get back from seeing Jasper in the beatboxing competition?

I thought it was the yodeling competition.

What is that?

It's a timer. What are you timing?

Muffins. What is that smell?

It's Piper. What? She hasn't had a bath in a week.

vacuum i'm just as surprised as you are oh i get it the lying thing huh

what'd you buy hmm what'd you buy to the makeup well where is it okay so uh i

don't have it because i saw an ugly person on the street and i gave them all

makeup because they were so ugly that's our boy you're actually a terrible

liar yeah still pretty funny though

Emergency call. I'm on it. Henry, quick.

There's an emergency.

We know. We know.

Well, Dolly, pardon me for checking.

All right, man. Let's chew and blow. And then we go.

We've had some pretty good gum runs over the years, haven't we?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

We've got a crime to thwart at the Swellview Airport.

Whoa. Do you guys, like, plan those rhymes?

Uh, no. No.

Let's go to space and kick some ass.

Then I guess I'll chew some gum and fight some scum.

Recording. Let's get busy, yo.

Then watch the video.

Let's go on a mission to catch a magician. I actually like that one a

Let's blow a bubble and get back into our pants.

That didn't run.

No time to explain.

Chew with urgency.

I don't know the emergency.

Good one. Thank you. You got it.

Stop.

Why? Because the emergency call is coming from junk and stuff.

It all just kind of happened. I wanted an after -school job, but then an

indestructible superhero hired me to be his sidekick.

Now we blow bubbles and fight crime.

Feels good.

Probably just Jasper.

Exactly.

We gotta get up there.

Why? Probably just got his head stuck in a lawn chair or something.

What? Probably just got his head stuck in a lawn chair or something. I heard

what you said. That just sounds ridiculous.

What'd I tell you?

Wow. Great call.

Pay up, suckers. We never bet.

Oh, right.

Just get me out of this thing. Buddy, this is bad even for you.

Strangest thing that Jasper's ever done.

Oh, you can say that again.

I'm Jasper. Remember me? Yeah. If you give me a pine cone, I'll lick my elbow.

Doesn't Ortho have thick hair?

Take me to the church.

He clobbered me!

Captain Manderpad!

Well, did you know I was born with 11 toes but only 9 on my feet?

What, you thought my hair was naturally curly?

Okay, enough about Jasper doing weird things.

Yup.

I want to hear about more of the stuff you guys did before I... I found out you

were Captain Man and Kid Danger.

How much time you got, Piper? Because there's a lot about us that you don't

know. Us?

Yeah, us.

I've known Henry's secret for years.

You still missed a lot before you found out.

Like what?

I,

Henry Hart. I, Henry Hart.

Pledge to be an awesome sidekick to Captain Man.

You got skills.

Yeah, yeah, she's hired.

Feels good.

I was young when I started.

Yeah. You hired a little kid to be your sidekick.

Yeah. That is grossly negligent.

Turns out you both missed out on a lot. You guys missed out on some fun stuff,

too.

Unlikely. Okay.

You did.

Piper and I spent a lot of time together before we found out the secret.

You're so bad.

You got me all wrong, friend.

No.

Let me handle this.

I'll give it to you. Yeah, you will. Don't push it. All right.

I thought it was funny. What?

Geez, what?

Hello? Have you been here the whole time?

I don't know.

Great disguise.

Thank you. I've had some even better ones over the years. We all have.

I'm not loving the disguise, Ray.

Kid danger.

We're happy to help.

Snappy red bumpy go live.

I'm a cheer lobster.

Uh, yes, I'm Henry.

Henry Hart.

Hello, Henry.

Oh, my God!

Oh,

you guys.

I forgot I was supposed to help Charlotte out with the science project.

waiting for me in my house.

Is your mom home?

Is your mom home?

That gets me every time. Every time? Do we do that a lot?

What about my puzzle?

What about my puzzle? We're on a liquid cleanse.

We're on a liquid cleanse.

That's stupid.

That's stupid.

What's important is... Tunneled.

Tunneled. What's your problem, man?

What's your problem, man?

What are you not doing, dude?

Can you not do one, dude?

Try going on Rumbler.

Huh? Try going on Rumbler. See, a slippery biscuit.

Hmm? A slippery biscuit.

Okay.

Oh,

you're right. We did that a lot.

Oh, jeez. I got 42 missed calls from Charlotte.

She's going to be mad.

Charlotte never gets mad.

Are you kidding me? What?

Charlotte! What?

She gets mad a lot.

She has good reasons.

Yeah, well, she's mad now, too. Listen.

Where are you?

She's mad. Let's go, let's go, let's go.

We're here.

We're here. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Where have you been?

At work. We got distracted.

For some reason, we keep remembering funny things today.

Hey, is your mom here?

Dude, what is your deal with my mom?

I don't have a deal with your mom. What are you talking about?

What's this?

My mom.

Nice!

We can both agree that your mom is beautiful.

What?

Hello, Mrs. Hart.

Hi. Why are you here?

To protect your mother.

And me.

Yes, sir.

Yes, the spirits definitely want you to keep giving me a hand massage.

Fascinating.

She is one fine little lady.

You know, I think you look way too young to be anyone's mother.

Oh, stop.

Yeah, stop.

Put it back?

All right, all right, okay.

Let's just move on.

Where'd you get that flare?

Hey, give it.

No. Give it.

Okay,

I need someone to film me doing my science experiment right away.

Why in Henry's kitchen?

Why aren't you in your own kitchen, Charlotte?

Yeah, Charlotte.

Seriously?

Did you guys light my house on fire?

No. No, no, no.

Take it easy. I mean, yeah.

Just the kitchen. How did you guys light my kitchen on fire?

Did you guys try to put it out? Yes. Of course we did.

You know that saying, fight fire with fire? Yeah, that does not work. Oh.

Right.

Now, will someone please film me doing my science experiment before it's too

late? Too late for what?

It's about to explode!

Someone

hurry

up and film me completing my experiment before it explodes!

Henry, you do it.

In three, two, one... Hey, he's making explosions.

Yeah, what's up, big dog?

How many times have we almost gotten blown up?

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Now he's going to start acting.

Bless me.

the package.

About to open it up right now.

We've really been through a lot together, haven't we?

Yeah.

Oh, come on!

Yeah.

I need help.

And someday, someone's gonna have to take over for me.

Like me?

Ken!

What right do I have to take you around with me and put you in all kinds of

dangerous situations?

Hey, I wanted this job, and you need a sidekick.

I know, but...

Maybe it's too risky.

Stupid cannonball!

You killed my friend!

I don't want a hug from you right after I tell you I want a hug. I only want it

to happen because you want to hug me when it's your idea, not because I have

ask for it.

I'm scared to think my friend can't eat me. We've beaten like a thousand bad

guys. Yeah, well, this is different.

This is personal.

You don't know what you're doing, man!

What? You tapped your cheek!

I didn't want you to kiss it!

Punch it! Where does Henry Hart end and Kid Danger begin?

Oh. Thanks for listening to me.

Because my science experiment was about to... Blow out.

Ew.

Thanks for blowing out my kitchen, Charlotte.

Yeah, thanks. I tried to get you to film it before.

Yeah?

Charlotte's exploding science experiment just gave me an idea.

Listening. Could we go to an alternate dimension and steal another kitchen for

Henry? I don't see why not.

I think we could. Great idea.

But first...

Could you find us the dimension where actors are, I don't know, like trying to

pretend to be us? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But sometimes they mess up their lines.

Yeah. Or experience other funny, unforeseen myths happen like that. You

like bloopers?

Yes. Yeah. Can you find us a blooper dimension?

I don't see mine at all.

Yes. Yeah.

The table's set.

Let's eat while the soup's still wet.

That's not right.

That's good.

I, Henry Hart, pledge to never, ever, ever tell anyone that I am Captain Man's

secret sidekick. And to never, ever reveal that I'm secret... Hey,

Jasper. What?

are cleaning my swimming pool because you failed this algebra test then

out of school.

Yeah. Then flunked out of school.

Yeah. Bubble time.

Oh.

I don't think it's going to work out, Charlotte.

And there's lots of really cool celebrities who say gluten's bad.

Do you need medicine?

What just went wrong?

I think it broke because I feel something going down my back.

That's the murmuring of producers saying, we got it, but let's do it

That'd be hilarious.