Original subtitles

Hello.

Mrs. Zoe Kane?

Oh, miss.

My apologies.

It's okay.

Would you like to follow me?

Well, good news, Miss Kane.

Your fertility results are surprisingly positive.

Really?

Yeah, you're looking very healthy. I see no obvious reason why you wouldn't be

able to conceive.

That's amazing. I thought you were going to say these eggs are good as fried.

Well, there is some scarring from your last operation, but...

Most women with endometriosis go on to have normal pregnancies.

Amazing. Well, that's all I needed to know. Thank you, doctor.

It's the getting there. That can be tricky.

What? I wouldn't delay a thing. I mean, you already know that endometriosis

tissue will probably keep coming back.

Right now, everything looks okay, but if you already know that you want to start

a family, you might want to act on it sooner than later.

But I'm only 30.

Well, the beauty of the modern world is that you have a choice.

Well, actually, I'm very much single, so I don't really know how I have a

choice. Even if I started dating someone, who would want to have a kid

away? You know what I mean?

Well, then I could recommend artificial insemination.

That will cost you.

Like a sperm donor?

Mm -hmm.

Okay, well, how do you even decide? Because I can't even pick a good date.

Well, you tell us the characteristics that you're looking for in your baby's

father. We match you anonymously.

Is there an emotionally available feminist in the mix?

Why don't you go away, consider your options. No pressure at all, but it's

important that you know these fertility journeys can take years.

You know what?

It's a relief to know that if you can't buy love, you can't buy a baby.

I'm joking.

Okay.

I'll call you when I decide.

Oh my God, you're here.

Yeah, it's past time.

You're never gonna guess who's in your office. I had it for a morning.

Okay, don't get mad. It's Emmett Carmichael. Who?

Who? His face is, like, everywhere right now.

Got caught farting into the DMs as a married actress and his family's not

about it?

Uh, okay. I didn't know what to do. He brought chocolate.

Let's just see what we're working with.

Can I help you?

Oh.

Hey.

Emmett Carmichael.

That's my chair.

It's a nice chair. I don't know why you're here.

Well,

lucky for you, I'm not a socialite.

I'm a businessman.

And I'm here to employ you.

I'm sure you're aware of the unfortunate rumors about me.

Isn't that putting it mildly? You've had a string of unfortunate headlines

surrounding you lately.

Yeah. Yeah, there's a few things.

But, well, the tip of the iceberg would be the little... The DMs you've been

sending Stella Rooney?

Did you know she was married?

Look, I'm going to need you to get on this stuff ASAP, okay? My dear old dad

happened to freeze me out of my accounts until I can clear the family name.

I'm sorry.

I'm not your girl.

Excuse me?

But you're the best.

You got people that like Brian Kowalski again.

And nobody likes Brian Kowalski.

Thank you for doing your research, but my client list is actually full.

I can pay double, triple what your other clients are paying, right?

Eventually, of course.

Yeah, I do need it right now.

Look, I don't want to be here either, okay?

I was supposed to be in a yacht in Monaco right now. Maybe you should

In my experience...

These things are often better discussed over a cold glass of Dom.

What do you say?

Look, some free advice.

If you want someone to help you, don't walk into their office, sit in their

chair, and then make demands like a little king.

Little? Don't trip on your way out.

You're lost.

I doubt it.

And then he just sat there and mansplained at me.

Men are the worst.

You know Jake, that guy I've been talking to? The army guy?

No, dentist guy.

He asked me how much I weigh.

What? Yeah.

Okay, Bonnie set me up with someone next week, and I don't even know if I have

the energy for it. You trust your system with your dating life, and that's where

you're going wrong. Well, I want it to be nice, and now I feel like I can't

cancel. But after him, I'm done.

The market's saturated.

I know, but it's so much fun.

Is it really, though?

I'm tired of waiting around for someone half normal.

And... The clock is ticking. The clock is ticking. You sound like my mom.

Well, it is ticking for me, Rue.

What? Oh, you're kidding, right?

Well, if I don't decide to have kids now, I may never get the chance.

Says who?

It's a thing with endo.

Damages your fallopian tubes and your ovaries and leaves some people

Okay, some people, but maybe not you.

Yeah, but do I really want to take that risk?

Why don't I know any of this? I didn't know either.

Well, screw this. I've watched you suffer with this horrible disease for

and now you're forced to make this big decision before you're even ready?

I know. It's a lot.

Do you even like kids, though?

Of course I like kids. When did I say I didn't like kids?

It's when Sasha brought baby Lucas over for brunch.

Okay, he was very loud and very demanding.

Okay, and then when Kate brought her niece over that afternoon? She wasn't

reasonable. She was three.

Do you think I'd be a bad mom?

No, no. This is all just very new information for me. And look, I just

how to file my tax return yesterday, so this is like some serious adulting

you're doing.

Did you sell anything today?

No, but I watched a full season of Real Housewives.

That's not a good use of your time. I was studying social psychology.

You were avoiding getting a real job. Art is a real job, you corporate slave.

I'll have right next time though, I promise.

That's for children.

Are we ready?

I guess so.

Of course you are. Go make a baby.

This procedure shouldn't take long. You're welcome to wait in reception.

Oh, can I just wait here? I promise I won't touch anything.

Read your precious can.

Don't do anything weird.

Can I just have a sec before I go in?

Of course.

If you have any second thoughts. No. The time to think. No, no, no. I just need

a moment.

Take your time.

When you're ready, just come through.

It couldn't be better. Right away.

That was the least sexy moment of my life.

Hey, should we go? Yes. Let's go, go, go.

Okay.

All right.

Why are you staring at me? Look, I'm sorry. It's fascinating.

Your body could be making, like, a mini baby Zoe right now.

Are you sure you don't want to know about the dad?

Yes. Out of sight, out of mind.

I mean, unless he's, like, a serial killer or hairy or I don't know what.

But you're not worried about the kid not knowing?

Oh, my God. He's asked me this a hundred times. People do this all the time.

Okay. Right.

I just wanted to make sure you thought about it. That's all. Yeah, and it's

probably not going to work the first time. This is probably the beginning of

very long, expensive, and emotionally distressing time in my life.

Okay, let's eat.

Let's eat. Oh,

shoot. What?

I was supposed to meet up with Bonnie's guy tonight.

Oh, you should go.

Are you kidding me? I just got inseminated. Stop. Please stop using

It's giving me the ick.

Can't make it.

Stop. Stop.

Listen, okay, my cousin Jay told me that she hasn't been to the bathroom by

herself since her kid was born.

He's nine.

All right, so this might be your last chance to have fun for like 18 years.

You're right. Yeah. Come on. Okay. Yeah.

I'm going to go. Go. I'm getting ready. Be young.

Have fun. Be free.

Zoe, hi.

Hey. Have a seat.

Thanks.

So, just so you know, I am equally horrified to be here.

Is it that obvious?

I'm sorry, I've just been on so many... Bad days.

Yeah. Yes.

Well, do you like champagne?

I love champagne.

Great. Well, cheers to wanting to be anywhere else.

Cheers.

Okay, so...

We've established that we both are very sick and tired of this. But

hypothetically speaking, if you were looking for someone, who might they be?

Kind.

Emotionally intelligent.

Wants kids.

Great body, maybe.

Wow. Okay, that is a tall list.

What about you?

Off the top of my head, someone who's really super mean.

emotionally unavailable, doesn't like children at all, and loves pancakes.

What do you do?

I am actually a spiritual life coach.

Oh. I know what you're thinking, but I promise I'm not that weird.

Okay. You know what? Can we just not talk and instead have fun?

Yes, please.

Okay. I would love to.

Let's do that.

No, no, you please.

Starting now.

I'm turning the screen just until they think they're ready. Come on, Rob.

I'm going to have to set up a dance competition.

Sorry, I made that with a plan.

Wild full moon stars messing with me. That's free?

I'm going with free. Yeah.

The macaron.

Yeah. Wild full moon.

What's it going to be?

We have a winner. I hear you saying stay alive. I think I have to call it a

night. Oh, is the night over already?

This is the best date I've been on in months.

I am.

And you're right. You're only kind of weird.

Well, if you want to do it again, don't say no.

I would love to.

Can I walk you home?

Oh, no, that's okay.

Yeah, I can walk myself home. Okay. Thank you.

Oh.

Sorry. No, don't be sorry.

Okay.

That was it.

I'm going to walk away. Okay.

See you soon.

I hope.

What are you doing and why are you up so early?

I don't know. Getting healthy, I guess.

Not so fast.

How'd your date go?

Did you have to have a party?

I hardly call five people a party.

You were out, so what's the big deal?

Come on, it's Saturday. Relax. I'll get us some breakfast muffins.

I've been thinking.

Okay.

Isn't it time you found your own place?

I told you I'd have rent money. It's not about rent.

Then what?

I need to make this place somewhere I can raise a baby.

Okay, and why wouldn't I be a part of that? Because you're irresponsible.

What? You bring random strangers into the home. You're messy. You leave

on all day, and you don't respect my stuff. Oh, I'm sorry. Are we, like, 50

years old? Who cares if I'm a little messy?

Okay. Are you seriously kicking me out?

All those years ago, you said you just needed a place until you could find your

feet. Okay, so I'm a failure, too. That's great.

This doesn't change anything. This changes everything, Zoe. I'm going to

this baby, this phase in my life, going out, partying. It has to be over.

This is typical Zoe. You push everyone away. I just for some reason never

thought you would do it to me.

Fine.

And if you are pregnant, I've got news for you.

You may be good at your job and buying things and keeping your apartment clean,

but you actually suck at living life.

So good luck.

You're going to need it.

Okay, I got Justin Clark on the Pitch Perfect podcast, so I'd seen a car for

him. Okay, of course.

And can you get me Bavard? I want to try and get Lucy in the September issue,

but a small feature.

Anything else?

Um, no.

No. Just, uh, probably gonna be lightening my workload in the next

because I'm pregnant, so.

Shut up. Pregnant?

Okay, it's only six weeks along, so don't tell anyone.

Is it Rob?

No, it's not Rob.

It's someone else. We're trying to keep a low profile.

Oh, is he famous?

Hey there.

Frank's flowers.

Hey, Bonnie.

How you doing?

Got your flowers.

Okay. What? My assistant is probably out there telling everybody that you're my

new boyfriend, so thank you.

Was that such a bad thing?

Don't do that. Stop doing that.

Do what?

What am I doing? You know what you're doing. Doing what?

Okay. I picked these up on the way for you. It's a little pizza offering.

They're very expensive.

Whoa!

Why are you still here?

Yeah, waiting for you.

It's just even a good time.

Look. I really need you to rep me, okay?

I come onto your client list. I'll leave a blank check at the door.

I'm pregnant.

What?

And everything's okay.

Oh.

He's married.

What? No, he's not married.

That's not in the picture.

Yeah, that's your business. Well, congratulations on the baby. It's very

exciting.

About me being on the client list. Are you kidding me?

Find anybody out in the city. Anybody.

People say you're the best.

I want you.

You help me, I'll help you.

Yeah, I can help you with this whole baby daddy issue you're having.

I'm a baby daddy. I did it before. I can do it again. Right? It wasn't that

hard. I can come with you to the doctor's appointment that you got to go

It's sonogram and stuff, right? And I can...

I can help you renovate the baby's room.

I could do that. And I could also, I could even go to the grocery store for

Real late at night when you're having all those crazy cravings. You don't want

to go to the grocery store just because you're like huge.

You know, just like when you're a whale and you don't want to go and be seen in

public. Get out.

Okay? Just leave.

Okay. I'll leave.

I can do that.

Just think about it. Okay? Just think about it.

Well. You definitely are pregnant.

It's in the early days, so keep it to yourself. A little longer, seeing as you

are a little higher risk.

I thought you said this would take years.

I guess you're one of the lucky ones, Miss Kane.

I thought I would have time to adjust and prepare myself for this.

Now, I assume you know the basics.

Switch to Mocktail, no caffeine, no raw fish, no raw anything really.

And closer to the three -month mark, I highly recommend Mom and Baby

Conservatory in Upstate.

They'll teach you everything that you possibly could need to know. And after

Diane's class, you'll be ready to take on anything.

You know what?

Take someone with you. Trust me, you'll need all the support you can get.

Being a mother is the biggest rule of your life. It's important you do it

Well, congratulations.

Thank you. You're welcome.

Surprise. Hi, Mateo. Buddy, what are you doing here? I got a job here for a few

months.

That great?

Don't panic.

We're not moving in.

I just came by to ask you if you could take Mateo on the weekend and after

school here and there?

Yeah, of course.

Can I talk to you for a second?

Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, uh...

Mateo, I got a drone. I got you a drone. The big one.

That's 4K.

You want to check it out, or... It's a good one.

You got yourself a new drone?

You are closer to a midlife crisis than I thought. Okay, cool. You couldn't have

given me any notice before you show up here? Right. I would have had Maria

the place up a little bit. Can you still afford to keep Maria?

Tomorrow's her last day, actually. Thank you for that.

Emmett, what is going on?

Mateo hasn't seen you in months.

I've been busy at work and had a lot of business deals coming through and... Oh,

I've heard.

I've heard I missed our chats.

Look, don't have women around him.

What's it to say to you? Bye, honey. I love you.

Bye, Mom.

Bye.

Thanks for stopping by.

Okay.

Good.

I can just watch TV if you don't know what to do with me.

Yeah, that'd be great.

I've got a few business calls I've got to take care of.

Great.

I'll be right back. I'll be right back. Okay, this is good.

I issued a statement about you right away and it worked, didn't it?

Yeah, we'll see.

The real question is, what do we do now?

Which leads us to the hardest part, dealing with you.

So where do we go from here? Okay. Wait, let me stop you there. I got a few

ideas. Idea number one, what we do is we just go to a sick kid's hospital, you

know, do a little photo op, really tug on people's heartstrings, show my softer

side, right?

Or what we could do...

This one's actually easier. We just get a little puppy, really tiny, cute one.

We tell people it's a rescue dog. We do a little photo op, put it up on the

gram, right? All the celebrities are doing that. That's not how I work.

We're not going to convince the press of something that's not true. Okay, you

have to actually change so this never happens again.

You are supposed to help me with my PR problem. I am helping you by making you

help yourself.

Okay, step one, therapy.

Well, I'm guessing you've never been to therapy a day in your life.

I don't need therapy. Number two, you'll want to find a purpose. Something that

you're actually passionate about. A project that you'd be really excited

So just take out a pen and paper and spitball some ideas, okay?

Well, I don't have a pen, so... No problem.

Out of curiosity, do you use a bathroom on your own or do you need someone to

help you with that?

Hmm. This is very funny.

What's number three, then? I've got my buddy Mike's whiskey launch in about an

hour here, so... You're not going to that.

Excuse me? You will not be attending that.

What?

Number three, mom and baby conservatory. My doctor recommended it.

That doesn't think it was on for a month.

Heal the deal. I help you, you help me.

What's a breast shell?

I don't know. You're the expert.

You've had a kid.

I never said I was an expert.

I have a kid. That's it.

Yeah, you don't look very pregnant.

You just look like you're a bit bloated.

Hey.

How you doing?

Ow! What?

Don't hit on the other mom.

I wasn't hitting on her. I was just being nice. Good morning, everyone.

My name is Diane Stevenson, and I am thrilled to welcome you to the Mom and

Conservatory. Please make yourself comfortable.

Is this a cult? You've brought me to a cult. Shh!

Now you're all here because you received the life -changing magical news that

you're expecting a child.

Over the next six months, we will guide you in everything from breastfeeding to

bath time to birth plan.

Now take a good look around.

On this journey, you will make friends for life. So let's kick things off with

gentle back massage.

Shall we? Please.

Oh, that's good.

I've actually got this knot in my lower back. Not you.

Me, obviously.

Oh, right.

Right.

My back.

Right? Yeah. Oh, that makes more sense.

Yeah. It's okay to feel a little overwhelmed on the first day. Just try

relax.

Oh. Relax.

Gently.

the tension.

Just relax.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Okay, okay.

I'm good. I got you, Emmett. I'm good.

Sorry. There you go. Yeah.

Get into the neck.

Nice and relaxing.

Gently press down on the sacrum.

Connection to your partner is very important.

Are you on your phone?

I got an email.

Okay. Do it to me.

Focus on your partner.

People are going to think I kidnapped you if you keep looking so

I didn't think there'd be so much touching.

We didn't do any of the stuff from the table. Okay. Well, I need these possums.

Yeah.

I'm off this way. Yeah, I'm going this way. You have the itinerary, right?

Got it right here.

Dad, the food's burning.

Nah, it's just getting crispy.

Hey, I need your help.

Which one?

For what?

Well, I got to meet at the bank tomorrow.

I got to look serious.

They're all the same.

What? They're not all the same. This one is Giorgio Armani, Tom Ford.

This one, Gucci.

Okay, they're not all the same.

Aren't you embarrassed of all these designer clothes?

Some people have nothing.

Okay.

It's hot.

Don't touch.

It'll make the garlic really pop.

What about hanging out tonight, maybe? You know, we've just been...

In two separate rooms, it seems like, since you got here.

You know, maybe we, uh... Maybe we do something?

Like what?

Watch a movie?

You like action?

Not really.

Oh, really?

Uh, okay, well, uh... Oh, Crystal Racer.

Why don't we play that?

What's that?

You don't know Crystal Racer?

It's like the hottest game out right now.

All the kids I talk about in school?

No. The one with the badass blonde with the... Stop doing that.

No.

Okay.

I don't know. If you keep shutting down all my ideas, maybe you could come up

with something.

Huh?

Can we order takeout?

Yeah.

Emmett, we need to get you back into the game. Do you have any idea through your

project?

Is there anything I could do in car racing?

Okay, well, while you think of a genius idea, I set you up an interview in

Brevard. Oh, not with Lacey Duvern.

Right, she hates me.

She's going to hang out with you for the next couple months because the piece

isn't coming out until the end of the year.

So we have time for you to find a project, okay?

Fine. Fine?

I had to beg, borrow, and steal for this. Okay, I spent four hours on the

trying to get this interview.

Okay, sorry.

I appreciate what you're doing for me.

Oh. Here she comes, a cult leader herself.

Good morning.

Morning. Good morning, everyone.

Are you ready to meet your babies?

Each of you has been assigned your own infant simulator doll.

Now, they're specifically designed to cry when they need to be fed, burped,

rocked, or changed.

So, pick a name and we can get started.

Can we just do something?

I don't know what to do.

Didn't you ever change Maddie's diaper? One.

They're a complete disaster.

How many times a day do you have to change it?

Oh, about as many times as they feed.

So what, like three times?

Oh, no, 10 to 12 times a day in the beginning.

What?

Don't worry about it. You'll be able to do it in your sleep after a while.

Why is it still crying?

The diaper?

Yeah. What is going on? We did the bottom, we did the diaper.

Maybe it's because you're not calling him by his name.

Maybe try rocking it.

Try rocking it.

Gently. I am rocking it gently. Clearly don't gently do it. Can you just... I

don't know what to do. Take it. Do something.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. What do you think? Where are the batteries in this

thing? No, we can't take them out. It'll be like we cheated.

I don't think anyone cares. She gave us a faulty doll.

No. I actually do cry this much sometimes. Then you do it.

I don't know.

Fine. I'll do it if you want to.

Maybe you just want to play, right? Babies like to play. Yeah.

How's your dad doing?

Oh, no.

Oh, that.

Zoe, wait.

There you are.

We were looking for you.

We were getting worried.

We can't do that.

What? Sure you can.

It's just a doll. Not real.

Look.

Not real.

Tough crowd.

Everyone's going to think that I suck.

Why do you care what they think?

You think anybody in there knows anything more than you do?

They don't. That's why they're here.

Look, the burping and the diapers, all that nonsense, it comes instinctual.

Right? Don't worry about it so much.

We used to have a garden just like this at a Rhode Island place.

It was beautiful.

I used to help the gardener, Jonas, weed sometimes, watering.

When my dad found out, he had the garden pulled up and put in a tennis court.

So mean.

Sorry. Yeah.

Not everybody's got to be a good parent.

But you are.

I promise.

Do you think you're a good dad?

No.

I haven't been.

I've been a bit absentee the last few years.

Well, it's clear that Mateo thinks I'm a loser, so... Really?

Yeah.

Yeah.

No, no, we're just in this weird space where I'm just trying so hard to make up

for it, and he's... He's just not really having any of it.

Well, you know, maybe just don't force it and find, like, cool activity you

could do together.

Low pressure.

You hear that?

Maybe we're not such bad parents after all.

Goodbye, baby. Let's get back inside before Diane sends out a search party.

You got this.

Okay.

Think scary looking.

Probably why you have so much fear around it, right?

Okay, bud, you ready?

I guess.

You guess?

You don't guess, you know.

You know, you got this, right? You got to stay focused, remember? Focus.

Good. A little father -son time, right?

Ready? Pull.

Hey, that's okay.

That's all right, all right? You see what happened there? You lost your

confidence, right?

So you just got to stay focused, keep your eye on the ball.

You got to believe to achieve, yeah?

You got this.

Stay focused.

You got this, right?

Ready?

Pull!

All right, one more. Okay, third time's a charm. You got this.

Ready?

Pull!

I don't want to do it anymore, Dad.

What? What do you mean you don't want to do it anymore?

What kind of attitude is that?

You got this.

You can do way better than that, okay? Dad, I don't want to do it anymore!

Hey!

Maddie! Maddie!

Hey.

You, uh, you free?

Hey.

There you are.

Yeah. Thanks for coming.

Yeah, no problem.

Hey, Mateo.

It's nice to meet you.

I'm Zoe.

Are you one of my dad's girlfriends?

Mateo? Are you kidding?

I have standards.

Excuse me?

I brought churros.

Just put them here.

I would like one of those.

So, I hear you also don't like sports.

So, do you want to tell me what's really going on?

Emmett, we need chocolate sauce.

We're in a park. When are we going to get chocolate sauce?

I will figure that out.

I don't like it here.

Nobody understands me.

I think we all kind of feel like that at your age. But I promise you, it gets

better.

My mom's always busy.

I hate my new school.

Why do you hate it?

Other kids make fun of me.

I took some of my mom's makeup to class.

They laughed at me, and Ms. Finder told me to take it off.

Well, I think that's just the rule sometimes at school, but I'm sorry they

you feel so bad about it.

I can't help it if I don't like the same stuff as the other boys.

You know, I know it's hard right now, but I promise you, one day you are going

to be so happy that you are not like the other boys.

Hey, my baby showers in a few months.

Do you want to come do my makeup?

I'd like that.

So, what'd you say to him?

Nothing really. I mean, you just have to remember, you're still getting to know

each other. So, be gentler.

Gentler? It was baseball. What could be more gentle than baseball?

My fathers and sons are supposed to play baseball.

And I'm supposed to give them tips, you know, help them grow up and get serious.

And that's what my dad used to do.

Ugh.

Hmm. Well, he's a lovely kid.

He is a lovely kid, isn't he?

Thanks for coming.

Oh, yeah. No, I was just at home anyway, generally questioning my life choices.

Well... Okay, well, see you at baby class.

Right, yeah.

See ya.

Hey, um, what are you doing tomorrow?

Uh, probably more of what I just said.

Well... Alana's got Maddie all day, and I was thinking about maybe, I don't

know, going to the farmer's market, picking up some food.

Maybe I could make a cookie lunch at your place. We could work on the baby's

room. I owe you for today.

Yeah, sure.

Sure. Great. It's a date.

What? Huh?

Joking.

Okay. Bye.

Bye. Playing around. Bye -bye.

Okay, let me hit you with something.

Style with dignity.

Be a personal stylist?

No! What?

It's my business idea, right?

What we're going to do is we're going to get rich dummies like me to donate

their clothes to people who can't afford them for job interviews and whatnot,

right? So that these people aren't being discriminated against in these moments

where they need to get hired. That's an amazing idea, Emmett.

Thanks. Do you have anyone to help you get it off the ground?

I've been talking to a few high -level business execs. Just conversations right

now, but turns out not everyone that's down hates me.

You know, I think you should quit with your whole bad boy act. I don't think

it's who you are.

Anyway, I'll get Bonnie to draft up a press release or something.

Ow! You okay?

Yeah, just like a weird cramp.

Oh, gas.

No, it's a weird cramp.

Um... Hey, who's going with you to the hospital?

Oh, uh, like to give birth?

Yeah.

It's pretty normal to give birth alone.

I don't think so.

What, you don't have a, your mom or a friend to go with you?

Oh, no, no mom.

No mom?

Well, it would have been Rue, but we're fighting right now.

You don't think you can mend things?

No, she won't answer my phone call.

Hey, did you know that the baby is currently the size of a lemon?

Really? Yeah.

I downloaded an app the other day, and that's a little fun fact it had for me.

Catch.

Zoe. Rob.

How are you? Long time no see.

Are those candles scented?

Sorry, I've been a bit busy, as you can see.

Congratulations. Thanks.

Was that Emmett Carmichael? Yeah.

Oh, I'm not with him or anything strictly business.

The father's actually not in the picture.

Oh, okay. Well, you look great.

Thank you.

Well, it was nice running into you. Yeah, yeah. Okay, well, have a good one.

You too.

Hey, what do you say to a second date soon?

You know I'm only going to get more pregnant, right?

Yeah, I figured that's how it works.

Seriously, I'd, uh...

I'd love to see you again.

Okay. Yeah, sure. I'd like that.

Cool. I'll text you.

Great. Okay. Bye.

Bye.

Guess who just bought themselves a date?

Really? Yeah, really.

Okay, I might look like a certified sea mammal in a few months, but I obviously

still got it.

Well, there's something wrong with the guy. Do you know him from before or

something? We actually dated.

I think I ghosted him.

He's hot, though, right?

If you're into that sort of thing. He looks like a model.

Catalog, maybe.

But was he voted fifth sexiest celebrity villain? I don't think so.

Tell me that didn't happen. It sure did, right? And I should have got second.

Politics.

So, are we falling for dinner later?

Oh, uh, right.

I have therapy, actually.

Yeah, I forgot.

Oh. Well, that's more important anyway.

Yeah. All right, well, I'm headed that way.

Oh, don't forget your lemons.

Ciao.

Bye.

I think something's wrong.

What's wrong?

I just had this sharp pain in my stomach.

Okay.

That could be normal. That's fine.

Describe the pain to me.

Is it still hurting?

No. It's gone.

It's gone now.

What did you eat tonight?

I just had Chinese takeout.

Oh. Yeah.

You got gas.

Well, that's actually not why I called. I called because I'm going on a date

tomorrow, and I wanted to see if you would help me pick something to wear.

uh, yeah.

Okay. I guess I don't got anything.

Hanging with my pregnant publicist?

Sounds good.

You want to hang out on the phone in case it... It happens again there.

Yeah.

Well, if you start snoring, I'm gonna hang up on you.

Okay. What about this?

This is option number one.

Uh, it's a little too try -hard.

I have a lot of profess in this draft.

I can't tell if I want to showcase my bump or hide it.

Hardly a bump. It just looks like you had a bowl of pasta and about six beer.

don't even know what I want to talk about. The only thing on my brain right

is five amazing ways to eat your placenta.

What? Yeah, people do it.

It's so gross.

Seriously, do you have any tips?

Uh, I don't know. Just be yourself.

Try not to do the twitchy thing with your hands so much. What?

You know this thing?

It really shows that you're nervous.

Okay, well, this is my next option.

You don't have anything better than that?

You don't have anything?

Yeah.

It's the one for sure. It's really classy.

Okay. I like it. Can you close this area up a bit?

That's great.

Okay.

Oh, no, just water is good.

Oh, I forgot for a second. I'm sorry. Okay, I forget all the time.

We didn't have to come back to the exact same place. I would have taken you

anywhere. I was craving a cashew with pepe. Okay, okay.

And I do have to say, the pregnancy glow is a real thing.

I don't feel it at all.

Maybe we can do this at my place next time.

Next time? You're very sure of yourself. We haven't even had dessert.

Well, I just feel this amazing energy between us.

What's your sign, if you don't mind me asking?

Virgo. I knew it. I think that's why we feel so aligned.

Sorry, baby bladder. I'll be right back. Oh, of course.

What

are

you doing?

Hey, buddy. Just, um, just working.

You have a job?

Yeah. Yeah, I'm actually trying to create some jobs.

You inspired the idea.

Really? Yeah.

You want to hear about it? Yeah.

Okay.

Cool. Cool.

Well, it's called Styles with Dignity.

And you know the closet I have just full of designer clothes?

Yeah. Well, the idea is that I take them down to the homeless shelters.

And anybody who might be going out for a job interview that day, wants to get

employed again, we're going to suit them up real nice, give them a haircut,

maybe trim the beard, that type of stuff, so that these people get to feel

more confident when they're going out to look for work. Yeah, that's really

cool. Yeah? Mm -hmm. Great.

I could actually use your help with maybe some of the design stuff.

Really? For the logo, yeah.

Ooh. So what ideas do you have?

Well, I was thinking it could be based on maybe this guy.

So are you enjoying being pregnant?

I think so.

The fertility part was so stressful.

I didn't even think about parenting, which seemed like it would be more

stressful.

Well, you're going to be a great mom.

Thank you.

Yeah, the parenting classes have really helped. And Emmett's been great, despite

him being, you know, Emmett.

Yeah. What's the deal exactly with him?

Oh, it's embarrassing.

I agreed to be a publicist in exchange for him coming to all of my classes with

me because I didn't want to go through everything alone.

Really? I seem to remember not being allowed to walk you home.

Yeah. Well, now this kid's here, and I'm realizing how much support you actually

need, and I did not think I would get pregnant this quickly.

My parents aren't around, and I keep my circle pretty small, so he's been really

helpful. Yeah.

Well, I think you're going to be just fine.

Solo or not.

Thank you.

Shall we order some tiramisu? Oh, the baby loves tiramisu.

I love tiramisu too. Okay, so three then. I would like a piece too.

You mind if I come in?

Sure.

I've, uh... I've actually been meaning to, uh... to talk to you.

You mean your therapist told you to talk to me about something?

All right. Uh, how'd you know that?

You're pretty transparent, Dad.

I guess I'm just, uh...

Curious about what this stuff is.

It was months ago, and Mom already spoke to Miss Lander. I'm sorry, and I won't

put it on again.

No, no, Mateo. I think it's dumb that your school made you feel bad about

expressing yourself.

Oh.

I'm just interested in it.

What is it about wearing makeup that you like doing?

I don't know.

I think it's fun and, like, cool.

It's just fun.

Yeah.

What does your mom think about that?

Nothing really.

She lets me do her makeup sometimes.

She does?

Yeah.

Maybe you should do mine.

Okay, well, I could draw a few sketches.

Maybe like one of those eye things that you were doing on... Like this?

Yeah.

Choose your favorite color, probably.

Um... Holy.

Yeah. This way thought I'm a Carmichael couldn't get any prettier. I'm guessing

this was Matteo unless we need to have a bigger conversation.

No, this was definitely Matteo. It looks amazing.

Yeah. I had no idea.

Do you want to come in?

Good morning.

Okay. Welcome to the big one. Today we're talking birth plans and what to

in labor.

But first, partner, especially the men in the room.

Today we have a surprise for you. Do we have a willing volunteer?

Do that.

My partner, Evan, would like to volunteer.

Perfect.

Perfect.

Okay.

Perfect.

All right.

Okay.

That's the whole thing?

Yes. This will simulate the feeling of childbirth, and you can all try it

afterwards. It's a great way to really understand what your partners are going

through and to empathize with their experience.

Okay. Fire it up. Okay.

You're about to experience your first contraction.

Okay. I'm starting gently.

This would be an early one.

Those little socks.

Strong, actually.

No, stay calm. Remember all the hypnobirthing techniques that we've

Breathe.

Good. Those little socks are similar to what your partners are going to feel as

contraction. I don't like it.

That's good. And so we could offer some encouragement.

Oh, good job.

There you go.

Okay, okay.

Who's next?

Oh, I can't believe you're going to have to go through that.

Seriously, that may be the worst pain I've ever experienced in my whole life.

I don't want to talk about that.

Because we're not men.

Well,

I think I've decided that I can't let you do it on your own.

What? Yeah, I'm a busy guy and it's a big sacrifice.

I think I should be your birth partner.

Really? Yeah.

Yeah, if you'll have me.

On another note, I'm actually kind of starting to enjoy the therapy stuff.

Really?

I mean, it's a little terrifying to realize that you've been completely

up since, like, the age of five.

It does make you feel better after, though, right?

Yeah.

I do feel lighter.

Oh. Oh!

Maddie wants me to invite you for dinner tonight.

Oh, I can't. I'm hanging out with Rob all day.

I thought you hung out with him all day yesterday.

I know.

I know I should be focusing on the baby, but it just makes me feel so good.

Nice.

Oh! I think I'm going to go to the next class by myself.

It's mostly just mom stuff anyway.

How to breastfeed, taking care of yourself after birth, that kind of

Are you sure? I really don't like coming.

No, it's okay.

I'm so bad at this.

It's fine.

Feeding the artistic soul, and that's all that matters. Rue would be laughing.

so hard at me right now all right let's see what you got

yeah no that's um what were you

what were you going for there i'm gonna say abstract you

nailed it rob what are we doing

painting come on i mean like

I'm having a lot of fun with you, but I still don't know why you're dating me.

And please don't tell me it's some kind of weird fetish.

Honestly, it's not that complicated for me. I really like you, and I think you

like me too.

Okay, I get the you and me part.

What about the baby that's about to come crashing into the picture?

I'm going to be a new mom soon.

I'm going to be knee -deep in breast milk and diapers, and I just...

I don't want to fall for you if that's not something you want.

Zoe, I love kids.

And in no way am I trying to push myself in here, but I see a future for us.

Whether that's now or a few years down the road when things maybe settle down.

But I'd wait for you.

If you want.

wait for you he actually said that you know people don't tell you that being

pregnant makes you you know in the mood like all the time thanks for sharing and

the kiss was just you know it's okay if the story ends there actually yeah i

just had breakfast so you know how rare it is to meet a guy who says i'll wait

for you all right he's read jane austen to impress you that's what's happening

He just knows how to talk to women. If he knew how to talk to women, he would

just talk to them the same way he talks to men.

That's the secret.

How's that working out for you?

It's working out really well, actually.

Until you came along.

It's just, I don't know.

You are worth waiting for, though.

Now you're just mocking me.

What? I would never mock you.

Darling, don't you talk such a thing. Mark you? No.

But it's I, Robert.

Darling, I will wait for you until this baby comes out of here. You know, give

me a chip at least, all right?

What is that?

I just invented it this morning.

It's garlic bread with just a little bit of applesauce. Do you want some?

No.

I'm offended you even asked.

Okay. Pointer for the Lacey interview.

Have I told you how much I hate journalists?

Don't flirt with her.

Okay, don't make jokes about the texting scandal.

Fact, don't make any jokes at all. It's very important.

Great, so basically just get rid of my personality completely then? Absolutely.

You're implying that you're an entirely new person.

Okay, you stopped partying, you're going to therapy, you're focusing on your

family, and you've started a new business venture all on your own.

And also hanging out with a crazy pregnant lady all the time.

Oh, I found this in the baby's room.

My grandparents.

Yeah. We were really close. They basically raised me.

They raised you?

Mm -hmm. So what's the deal with your parents?

Okay, I'll say it quickly.

I never met my dad.

Met my mom a few times. She wasn't really cut out to be a mother.

So my grandma Sophie steps in.

We didn't have a house on Rhode Island, but they gave me a really good life.

Clearly, it turned out pretty good.

Unlike me, two parents, silver spoon, and still just messed up.

Thanks. I miss them a lot.

You ever think about contacting the baby daddy?

Maybe get some extra support happening?

Oh. No, I mean, he knows about the pregnancy, but he's agreed not to be

involved.

Alrighty then, you do you. Ooh, I gotta go.

Rob's taking me lawn bowling.

Lawn bowling? How old is this guy?

It promotes focus and concentration.

It's actually really good for the baby. He read about it in a book.

You're gonna go lawn bowling.

Okay, I'm probably just gonna sit and watch.

You and Maddie could come.

You'd have more fun than me.

Sure.

Stepping up to the mat is a young Miss Zoe Kane.

Triple champion of New York City, annual Chiro eat -off.

The question on everyone's mind today is, can she do it again?

I will not concede to your distraction tactic, Mr. Carmichael.

Just ignore him, babe. You can do this. Channel your, uh... Virgo energy.

You would be a Zodiac guy.

You guys, quiet.

I'm about to blow your minds with this shot.

Yeah, not so good.

I blame Emmett.

I'm tired.

Want to get some snacks, Maddie?

Thought you'd never ask. Let's go.

What about us?

Hello?

Looks like it's just you and me.

Shall we?

Pretty good. It's got to come back.

Going in a bit hot there.

Going in a little hot.

Who's winning?

It's a draw.

You doing okay there, Rob? You got a little something on your forehead.

I'm good.

So close.

Better luck next time.

You know what? I don't need to win. You know, because I already got the grand

prize.

Excuse me?

Oh, just kidding.

You know what I meant.

Did I?

Yeah.

Okay. I have to go to the bathroom.

Again?

Yes, Rob. I have a little tiny person dancing on my bladder.

Right.

You know what? I think we're going to head, too, actually.

But thank you for having us at your date. It's been fun.

Appreciate it. Am I going to see you at the ultrasound?

Well, why don't I go to the appointment with you, babe?

Save Emma some time, and I'm sure he's got a lot of virtuous charity work to

I'll be there.

Okay.

See you, Mateo.

Bye. Bye.

Bye, Fabio.

Hey, uh, you might want to wipe that off your face before you hop on the subway

button.

What'd you just say?

Oh, I'm just saying you don't want to let your son walk around like that in

front of people, right?

I'm proud of my son.

Dad, let's go.

Yeah.

Have a good day, Rob. Yeah, you too.

Let's get out of here.

Hey, uh, you know not to listen to Rob, right?

Yeah.

He's just scared because he wishes he could express himself like I can.

You're exactly right.

Who made you so smart, huh?

Your mom?

Maybe. Maybe.

Cheers.

You think Zoe's gonna marry Rob?

I hope not. Guy's a complete jerk.

I mean, uh... I just hope she's happy.

What do I care who she dates, anyways?

You should probably tell her.

Tell her what?

About, you know, how you like her.

I mean, she's a lot nicer than any of your other girlfriends.

What do you know about my other girlfriends? You've never met any of

I've read about them online.

Like the one who went on TV and talked about you.

Something to do with the hot tub.

You saw that, huh?

Look, that was a long time ago.

And I was really stupid back then.

It was a year ago.

Fair enough.

Sorry, but he's kind of a jerk.

Who, Emmett?

Oh, that feels so good.

I thought that too, but you just needed to get to know him.

The press has been really nasty to him, and his family is pretty awful to him

too.

Well, you know, when the baby comes, then you're going to be pretty busy, and

your deal with him will be over, so you might not even see much of him anymore.

Yeah, I will. He's my friend.

Hey, I want to ask you something.

Do you want to move in together?

What? I'm serious.

Your place, mine. I don't really care. I just want to be with you and raise this

baby together.

Really? Yeah, of course.

You think about it?

Yeah, I think about it. Okay.

Hi, Diane.

Oh, hey, Zoe.

No women today?

No, just me.

You make a wonderful couple, I must say.

Oh, we're not together.

He's just a friend. Well, he's a client. He's a friend who's also a client, and

he's just helping me out so I don't feel awkward.

I mean, just as long as you have the support that you need.

I have endometriosis.

Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that.

I've heard it's truly awful.

I mean...

I only got pregnant because I thought I wouldn't be able to get pregnant.

And now I feel like I got pregnant for the wrong reasons.

People don't tell you how much of a rollercoaster this is, but I raised my

boys on my own.

Yeah, it wasn't easy.

The most valuable thing I can tell you is that you're not always going to get

right. You're going to make mistakes, maybe big ones.

But if you love that child and you do your best, everything's going to be just

fine.

You know, you two could have fooled me, because your chemistry is off the

charts. What's not? I'm not a type.

I don't like him. Uh -huh.

Okay. He doesn't like me either.

Take a seat.

It's a great apartment.

One of your father's properties?

Yeah. I think he...

Bought this one just shortly after I graduated from college.

Have you financially depended on him ever since?

Do you take milk in your coffee?

Almond if you've got it.

Almond if I got it.

Almond if I got it.

We're in luck. Almond.

Yeah, here you go.

Sorry.

Look, you can relax.

I'm not going to eat you alive.

No?

I haven't done many of these interviews. It seems like every time I have,

nothing's always been taken out of context.

Just think of it as two old friends catching up at a bar.

Yeah, right.

So... Simple.

What have you been up to since the whole Stella Rooney scandal?

Um, not texting, that's for sure.

That's just a joke, a bad joke.

No, in all seriousness, I...

I do want to go on record in saying that I've actually reached out to Mr. Rooney

and apologized for my behavior. It was very immature of me, and

I've actually started doing therapy to try and figure out why I was doing that

in the first place.

Emmett Carmichael in therapy?

Never thought I would hear those words come out of your mouth.

Yeah, me neither.

That's actually what he's always doing.

She's been a lifesaver in more ways than one.

Is there more to that story?

Me and Zoe?

Yeah. No, no.

She actually threw up the first time she saw me. I'm just currently single.

It's strictly a professional relationship.

I'm currently single and trying to work on myself.

All right. And what are your father's plans to retire?

Am I looking at the next CEO of Carmichael and Carmichael Real Estate?

I respect my father more than anyone.

He built something from the ground up.

A real estate empire from not much more than two dimes when he started out.

And long story short, no, I will not be taking over Carmichael and Carmichael.

Why not?

I think I just came to a realization recently that, well, I want to build

something too.

You know, something that helps the community.

Something that my son can be proud of me for, like I am of my father.

How does your father feel about this?

I guess we'll find out when he reads this article, won't we?

Switching gears.

Can I tell you a little bit about my new venture?

Dialed with dignity?

Absolutely, with pleasure.

I'm all ears.

Great. I'm super excited about it. I think it'll be great.

Last night I had potato chips dipped in chocolate spread, so.

Don't tell Diane.

Your secret's safe with me.

Hey, is Robert cover from that ass -kicking I gave him yet? He said you had

unfair advantage.

Okay, if an unfair advantage is called talent, then yes, I did.

I spoke to Lacey, by the way, who said you actually came out very well in the

interview. Really?

Yeah, she was especially impressed by you saying that you planned to remain

off from your dad.

Yeah.

Yeah, I think it's time I step out on my own, you know? Good for you, Emmett.

Thanks. Whoa.

Whoa. You, uh... You okay?

Yeah. Baby's just kicking a lot today.

So weird.

Mind if I... Yeah, of course.

Whoa.

That's cool.

Zoe?

Rue?

Oh, yeah.

Happened.

Congratulations.

Hey. Oh, Emmett, this is, um, this is my... This is Rue. This is Rue. Yes,

heard so much about you, Rue.

Well, we have an appointment to get to, so... Bye.

You know what? Rue?

She's actually got a baby shower in the park on Saturday.

Yeah.

You should come.

Yeah, I don't know.

She misses you.

You know, I know she's been calling.

Uh, so you and Zoe are dating now?

Oh, no. No, uh, it's strictly professional. I'm just a client of hers.

Okay. Yeah.

Anyways, 2 p .m. Saturday in the park. There's gonna be a lemonade stand.

You really shouldn't miss it.

There we go.

That's the baby's heartbeat.

Did you want to know the gender?

Yes, please.

Oh, I know.

Are we going to do a gender reveal thing at the party? No, that's corny.

Come on. It's so much fun.

Okay.

Okay. I'll write it down for you.

Thank you.

Oh, my God. Look at the legs.

Yeah.

It's so nice to see both parents getting so emotional.

Oh, he's not a parent. No, I'm not. Just a friend.

Support.

Yeah, I'm going to have one of those for sure.

You did a really good job with everything.

It looks great.

What do you think, Dad?

I did Zoe's makeup.

You, uh... He's trying to say you look beautiful.

Thank you. And honestly, it's all thanks to you. You're a natural.

Thanks. He is, isn't he? Maybe you do mine sometime?

So I don't have to look like such a schmuck, huh? Definitely.

This looks amazing.

Thank you.

Yeah, no, it's actually mostly Bonnie's handiwork. I just did a little

finessing.

You, uh, not a bad turnout, actually.

I know.

Guess you're not such a loser after all.

You invited Mr. Darcy?

Yeah, I invited my boyfriend.

Well, you look perfect.

Good to see you again, Emmett. Hey, Rob.

Oh, Maddie, I want to introduce you to my friend. She works in fashion.

So?

Heard about the big article in Bavard? Mm -hmm. So he really did you a solid

there, huh? Yeah, she's amazing.

Well, we're about to have our hands full, so I'm sure she'll keep in touch.

know she really likes Mateo.

I'm not going anywhere, right? I'm her birth partner, so I'll be around.

Oh, that's great.

We're moving in together before then, so don't get too comfy.

Yeah, really excited about it, too.

Why don't I grab you some champagne?

You look kind of parched.

Here we are, baby reveal.

What's it going to be?

A girl. It's definitely going to be a boy. What do you mean? It's a girl.

Oh, here she comes. Here she comes.

I got to kill you.

One, two, three, go.

It's a girl.

So good.

So exciting.

Oh, she made it.

I should have called ahead.

No, are you kidding?

Look, I just wanted to give you this.

It's gender neutral.

And I can add her initials when she arrives.

It's beautiful.

Thank you.

Look, I'm...

So sorry I didn't return any of your phone calls. No, I'm through. I'm sorry.

should have never kicked you out like that. I thought I could do it on my own,

but I couldn't. Honestly, I don't even know what I was thinking at that time.

Something had to change.

You know my friend Jay?

The sculptor guy?

I moved in with him, and he got me a spot at the gallery.

What?

I've been creeping you. No, you're such a creep.

Who are these people? Oh, they're actually friends that I made outside of

Insane. Okay. They're from the Mommy and Baby Club.

Mommy and Baby.

Oh, I miss you.

I miss you so much. I miss you, too. I'm so sorry.

I'm sorry.

Oh, my God. You're huge. I know. I'm like the huge whale.

What?

Zoe. I know who the father is.

What? I'm so sorry. I saw the file on Dr. Mailing's desk. I really didn't mean

to. That was confidential. I know. It was an accident.

Okay, well, it doesn't matter because I don't even want to know anyway.

I think you might change your mind.

Let's just talk about it later.

Let's just go back to the party. I honestly don't.

Yeah. Okay.

I know. Oh, my God. Mama. Mama.

Dad, Zoe's friends wanted to do their makeup, too. Can I take this chair?

Yeah, sure. Go for it.

Have fun.

Thanks.

Oh, here, kid. Let a real man help you out.

Whoa, what are you doing?

Well, you weren't helping him. Nobody asked you to help him. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

What, are you going to hit me in a baby shower? What, you want me to hit you?

Emmett, what's going on?

Typical Emmett Carmichael. He just threatened me. What?

I said we were moving in together, and he threatened me. I did not threaten

I did not threaten him, all right?

Why are you with this guy?

He's such a phony. He calls himself a life coach and he's bullying a little

What are you talking about? Zoe, just don't do it, okay?

Don't move in with the guy.

I'm not saying move in with me. I'm just... I don't know what I'm saying. I

just... We make a great team, don't we?

I know you feel it too.

Hey, come on. You're embarrassing yourself now.

I mean, haven't you ruined enough relationships?

Why don't we let...

Zoe decides.

I'm sorry, Em.

Well, that's embarrassing.

Dad, let's go.

Yeah, buddy.

Thank you.

Okay, you still got a little baby to celebrate, right? So let's get the music

back on, and why don't we open some gifts?

Let's open some gifts.

So,

how was the

shower for you?

It was perfect.

Well, um... Oh, don't even think about Emmett. The guy's clearly got issues.

You said he threatened you?

Oh, yeah. He got pretty aggressive.

Why do you say you pick on kids?

Who knows?

Well, let's meditate.

I think I'm just going to watch TV.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no. This baby's going to grow up in a TV -free zone,

It's the only way to let the aura flow.

Oh, it's beautiful.

Thanks.

And a little reading nook. I know. I'm reading her the bell jar as soon as she

can walk.

Louie?

Rue, I don't want to know who the baby's father is.

It's Emmett, though.

What?

It's Emmett.

How does she know? She looked at the files when me and Dr. Maling were out of

the room.

What? That's completely unethical. She was just messing around. She didn't mean

to. Okay, well, you need to call your doctor and get the facts straight,

I didn't want to get my friend in trouble.

And my head's a mess right now.

Some friend she is. She was just looking out for me, Rob.

How could this have happened?

I don't know. It's crazy.

Okay, look.

This is still your baby and still your decision, so I totally respect your

energy here, okay?

But... I think we should stick to the original plan.

What plan?

You and me.

Two complementary auras together.

My parents have this place in Vancouver Island. I think we should move out there

and just get away from it all.

Rob, every time you talk about energies and auras, I have no idea what you're

saying.

Are you getting cold feet with us?

What? No, not at all. Because I'm falling for you, Zoe.

And I think it's important that this little girl have a solid family unit

two parents who love each other. And for God's sake, can we please get Emmett

out of the picture?

The guy is a loser.

I knew this was about Emmett. You like him, don't you?

He's my friend.

Mm -hmm.

I see the way he looks at you.

And whenever you two are together, you always have some little secret that both

of you are in on and nobody else knows about. It's infuriating. Rob, I'm with

you, aren't I?

Are you?

You know, you act like you're so different and understanding, but really

just like everybody else.

Why don't you call me when you figure all this out?

Oh, yeah.

Bavard arrived today.

Read it and tell me there's nothing going on between you two.

One night of sleep.

Hey.

Hey. Is Matty here?

Uh, no.

No, he's at his mom's. I can't sleep. He's jumbled in my head, Emmett. Um,

Jumbled and... Jumbled?

What? Did you threaten him?

Who? Rob? No, I... Well, he said some stuff to Mateo, and I got a little

heated, and I got in his face for just a second, but I did not threaten him.

I think we need to talk.

Yeah, um... Did you know?

Know what?

Emmett, the baby's yours.

Rue saw your name in the sperm donor record.

Uh, what?

I'm serious.

Did you donate to the fertility clinic in Chelsea?

Maybe. Maybe.

That was, um... Yeah. Yeah, I did. But that was just so long ago. That

was... That was before Mateo even. I don't... I don't know if it's the

talking, but don't you think maybe this could be amazing?

Uh, what?

Like, you and me, don't you think?

Me and you raising a kid together?

Yeah.

Yeah.

This is just so much. I, um... Who told you that? I... I called the clinic.

This baby is yours.

The baby is yours.

Who is that?

Nothing. Don't worry. Don't get that.

This is Katie.

Katie. Zoe.

She's an old friend.

Zoe!

Hey, Dad.

Hey. You, uh... You want breakfast, or...? I like cereal.

Well, just help yourself.

Good. You hungry? You want something? I'm good, thanks. I have a photo shoot

Manhattan in half an hour.

Oh, cool.

How was the baby shower?

Um... Pretty bad, actually.

Yeah, Maddie told me.

Yeah, yeah.

I shouldn't have snapped in front of him like that.

No, I'm glad he got to see his own father defending him.

Thank you.

The article is great, by the way.

Yeah, it was. It really was.

She, um... Zoe really killed it.

Yeah, Maddie talks about her all the time, you know.

Yeah, they seem to get along really well.

Well, don't self -sabotage.

Okay.

You deserve to have something good, Emmett.

Elena, I, um... Matty... He's just so lucky he had you.

I, uh... I should change my diaper.

Have a good shoot.

You'll kill that.

You're sad.

Uh -huh.

A little.

Yeah.

Because you fell in love with her.

disappointed dad did all that hard work then you let it all go

I wasn't sure you'd come.

Well, walking is my least favorite activity right now, so... Look, I'm so

sorry about last night.

She left right after you did, and nothing happened, okay?

And I don't know, I guess just with you and Rob and then the baby, I freaked

out.

Is that what you do when things get tough?

It's what I used to do, yeah.

But I don't want to do that anymore.

Did you really not know about the baby?

No. I had no idea. Of course not. I was just walking past that clinic one day.

It was like, I don't know, ten years ago. And then, I guess it was just some

sort of messed up act of rebellion against the Carmichael name.

Therapy, right?

I can't believe they chose you for me.

It's like it was always meant to be.

Oh, no. Ow.

I actually think I'm having a contraction.

But that's so early. I know. Like a full month, I think.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

We're having a baby.

Oh, ow. Oh, we need a cab. Okay.

I'm going to get a cab.

Cab!

Ready, baby girl?

I need you.

I can't climb

the dark

Mrs. Zoe Kane?

Oh, miss.

My apologies.

Okay. Would you like to follow me?

Well, good news, Miss Kane.

Your fertility results are surprisingly positive.

Really?

Yeah, you're looking very healthy. I see no obvious reason why you wouldn't be

able to conceive.

That's amazing. I thought you were going to say these eggs are good as fried.

Well, there is some scarring from your last operation, but... Most women with

endometriosis go on to have normal pregnancies.

Amazing. Well, that's all I needed to know. Thank you, doctor.

It's the getting down. That can be tricky.

What? You see, I wouldn't delay things.

I mean, you already know that endometriosis tissue will probably keep

back. Right now, everything looks okay, but if you already know that you want to

start a family, you might want to act on it sooner than later.

But I'm only 30.

Well, the beauty of the modern world is that you have a choice.

Well, actually, I'm very much single, so I don't really know how I have a

choice. Even if I started dating someone, who would want to have a kid

away? You know what I mean?

Well, then I could recommend artificial insemination, but that will cost you.

Like a sperm donor?

Mm -hmm.

Okay, well, how do you even decide?

Because... Well, you tell us the characteristics that you're looking for

baby's father. We match you anonymously.

Is there an emotionally available feminist in the mix?

Why don't you go there, consider your options, no pressure at all, but it's

important that you know these fertility journeys can take years.

You know what?

It's a relief to know that if you can't buy love, you can't buy a baby.

I'm joking.

Okay.

Kidding.

Okay, I got Justin Clark on the Pitch Perfect podcast, so I... Right.

Emmett, we need to get you back into the game. Do you have any ideas for your

project?

Is there anything I could do in Kari?

Uh...