Original subtitles

Xiaolin Showdown.

Xiaolin Showdown.

And...Action.

It appears evil boy genius Jack Spicer

has company.

Jackbots--attack!

That's gonna leave a mark.

Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!

Ah...Hmm?

All: Aah!

Ruby of Ramses!

Cut! No, no, no!

The camera stays on me...

Jack Spicer.

Jack, will you just get on with it?!

Nag, nag, nag!

The Shadow of Fear is mine!

Faster, Dojo!

Don't you worry.

Old Clay has got a rope or 2 up his sleeve.

Come along, little doggies!

Make your move, Spicer!

Makeup!

Hey--ooh--ah--

beautiful! Action!

Uh...Eh...Ee...Buh...

What's wrong with Clay?

Looks like he's got a pretty bad case of stage fright.

Hah hah hah hah hah hah!

Orb of Tornami!

Ohh! Ohh! Ooh!

Whoa! Aah!

Sword of the Storm!

Lotus Twister!

Uh-oh, uh-oh! Oh!

Ooh...They sure grow 'em big in Texas.

Ha ha! Once again i, Jack Spicer,

have triumphed over the Xiaolin losers,

and it's all captured on film!

You should be thinking more about world domination

and less about the movie.

Eh. They're pretty much the same thing.

Oh, cheer up, Clay.

There is no shame in a humiliating defeat.

Remember...It will only make you stronger

for the next one.

Yeah. Thanks. But i never figured

I'd turn out to be camera shy.

I feel lower than a tick huggin' a gopher's belly.

Dojo, exactly what does the Shadow of Fear do?

It allows whoever holds it

to enter another's dreams...

And bring to life

their deepest and darkest fear.

Hah! Then I have no worries,

because I have no fears.

Hold on there, partner.

See? No fear.

Huh?

Your courage is admirable, dragons in training.

Yet the bravest monk is not the one who fears nothing

but the one who is willing to face what he fears most.

Jack Spicer cannot defeat me

even with the Shadow of Fear,

because I have never met a fear I was afraid of!

Shh!

Guys, I want you to get in close for this.

Oh, quiet, you fool!

We are rolling!

When hunting the elusive wolf,

you have to move as quiet as a cat.

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

Ooh, that hurt!!

Shadow of Fear!

No...No!

No...No...

3 down...

One cue-ball to go.

Omi: I vow to obey the greatest dragon.

Everyone will want to meet Omi

and name streets after Omi

and build statues of Omi

and tell all their friends

of the day they actually met Omi!

Omi...Omi...

I should have known.

The kid's as boring in dreams as he is in real life.

Now...Let's see where his fear is.

What's going on?

Jack Spicer!

You are not welcome here.

Prepare to battle!

No...No!

It cannot be!

Hah hah hah hah hah!

This is your worst nightmare?

You want to fight with me?

Hah hah hah hah hah!

No...No!

Noooooo!

Clay: Sorry. I guess I'm a tad tired.

I didn't get enough shut-eye

to put the wag in a flea's tail.

Looks like my young monks had trouble sleeping last night.

Actually, I had a pretty gross dream.

Jack Spicer was in it.

Me, too! Did he do his evil laugh?

Yeah! And it was so annoying!

Now that Jack has the Shadow of Fear,

it's very possible that he has been visiting your dreams.

Talk about wanting to wash my brain out...

I am not afraid of anything

Jack Spicer may find inside my head!

Omi, since you are so unafraid,

you will watch over the Shen Gong Wu.

Jack Spicer!

Quiet on the set!

Rolling!

The one...The only...

Ruler of the universe,

master of evil--

less talk and more Shen Gong Wu!

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't watch me!

I'm an artiste. I'm temperamental.

Ok. Let me set up the scene for you, baldy.

You're defending the Shen Gong Wu

when you are defeated by your own cowardice.

Hah! You are no longer in your rocker.

I fear nothing.

Oh, really? Cut. Let me do that line again.

Oh... really?!

Just do it! I don't have all eternity.

Well, I do, but I don't want to spend it with you.

Shadow of Fear!

Omi: No... it cannot be!

I will not fear. I will not fear.

I will not...Stay here!

Aah!

Cut and print. That's a keeper.

I'm so evil, I can't stand it!

Hah hah hah hah hah hah hah!

Aah!

Did you hear that?

Sounded like a heifer

with its tongue stuck to a frozen flagpole.

Jack Spicer? Jack Spicer!

In the flesh. No autographs, please.

Stop them!

I told you to hurry!

But no... all you care about

is your precious little movie!

I needed more footage!

Don't worry, I'll get the rest in retakes.

Camerabots--attack!

Don't worry, xioalin losers.

I'll thank you in my acceptance speech.

It's not too bad.

They only got a few of the Shen Gong Wu.

Where's Omi? He's supposed to be guarding the temple!

Hey, what happened little partner?

You're supposed to be on guard.

Maybe we should bring him inside.

He doesn't look too good.

Is everybody ready to go kick some Jack Spicer butt?

Does a bull like to snort?

Yeah.

I couldn't have put it better myself.

Uh...

I have some... scrolls to study right now.

What?

And, of course, there is that gardening

I promised master fung I'd finish.

You'd rather garden than kick butt?

Then there's the floors I must scrub

with a very small toothbrush.

I should begin now.

What's the problem, Omi? You ok?

I'm fine! What could possibly be the matter?

It's not like I'm afraid or anything.

No, don't! I need a bath!

I must fight clean!

Never mind.

Lights, cameras...

Action!

We've come for the stolen Shen Gong Wu, Jack.

Judallet flip, Fire!

Good, good. Very dramatic.

But so is this--

Shadow of Fear!

Play with me, Kimiko.

Lil' chica! No! It can't be!

Don't you want a hug?

No! No, stay away!

Come and give your granny a kiss,

my little Clay-way.

I'm gonna give you a pinch on the cheeky!

Granny Lilly! I couldn't feel my cheek for a month

after the last time you--

aah!

No!

I always knew you existed in the Water,

and now here, too!

No!

Maybe it will not be here.

No!

Maybe it has gone away.

Eee...Aah!

Miniko!

Aah!

Zoom in!

Now show me more fear!

Hoo hoo hah hah hah hah!

Cut and print!

Amazing, Jack. For once you have done well!

What can I say? I was born to direct.

Hah hah hah hah hah!

It seems Jack Spicer

has found your worst nightmares

using the Shadow of Fear.

Hey, check this out.

It's one of Jack's camerabots

taken out during the raid.

Ha ha ha ha!

Why didn't you warn us, little buckaroo?

I was to ashamed to tell any of you.

Perhaps if I had,

you could have been better prepared

for our humiliating defeat.

Sorry to break up this downer fest,

but I'm sensing another Shen Gong Wu.

The Crouching Cougar,

an excellent ground vehicle for jungle travel,

with all the power and handling

any young warrior could ask for.

Do not lose hope.

Realizing one's fears is the first step

to facing them.

Raimundo: I'm all for listening

to master fong's wiseness,

but facing my fear isn't going to work.

It's only going to get me eaten.

But what can we do?

Perhaps we should swap fears.

Mm-hmm!

Yeah!

Good idea!

Yeah!

I want a close-up of the Shen Gong Wu

when I find it.

Hurry, Jack!

We're going to lose the Crouching Cougar.

No, wait!

Shadow of Fear!

Kimiko: Here they come!

Remember the plan.

Switch!

I do not play with dolls.

I defeat them!

Fist of Tebigong!

Come on, granny.

Let's go.

Pinchy, pinchy.

Aah!

Bring it on,

you dadgarn gelatinous glob!

Arrgh!

Kiss your bony little butt good-bye,

you glorified rodent.

Hey, no fair!

Where does it say they can switch?

I hate it when actors improvise.

Just forget about them and get the Shen Gong Wu.

Jack Spicer! Stop him!

Ha ha ha ha! Too late!

The Shen Gong Wu is mine!

Wait. Where's my close-up?

It's a 5, 6, 7...

8-way Xiaolin Showdown!

All: Huh?!

Is there such a thing?

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Oh, oh, oh, here it is.

It's in the supplemental pages that came out

in the last 200 years.

Basically it's 4 against 4,

each wagering one Shen Gong Wu.

Whoo-whee!

We're gonna need a wheelbarrow full of Wu

for this showdown.

Then we wager our two ton tunic,

Shroud of Shadows, Lotus Twister

and Silk Spinner

against your Serpent's Tail,

Eye of Dashi, Third arm Sash and Fist of Tebigong.

Slow down! I can't write that fast.

The game is a free-for-all sumo match,

face-to-face with your own worst fear.

First to leave the ring loses.

Ha ha ha ha!

Brilliant, Jack!

Bravo!

Let's go!

Xiaolin Showdown!

Whoa! This is most embarrassing.

I used to do a little wrastlin' back home,

but only with greased pigs.

Jack: Enough chatter. Let's wrestle!

By the way, you guys, cool diapers.

All: Gong yi tan pai!

Eye of Dashi!

Shroud of Shadows!

Aah!

Silk Spinner!

Aah!

How about that kissy?

Mm-wah! No!

Aah!

Fist of Tebigong!

Jack: Come on, guys! A little action here!

Maybe we can work in a car chase?

Lotus Twister!

A grandson should only have to take so much!

It's only a squirrel.

Aah!

The greatest monk is not the one who fears nothing,

but the one who is willing to face what he fears most.

Aah!

I still fear you--aah!

But I do not fear to face you!

Two ton tunic!

You're out!

Aah!

All: You're out!

We're victorious!

Whoo hoo!

Do it all the way!

Not a lip bruise anywhere.

You and your directing!

Nine!

We lost 9 Shen Gong Wu!

Cut! Cut! I said cut!

It's funny how things so small can seem so large

in our minds.

I wonder what Jack Spicer's greatest fear is.

Guess we'll never know.

I know!

I picked it up when no one was looking.

The shadow of fears!

Huh? Oh!

Eee! No!

Aah! Aah! Aah!

Aah!