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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:48,040 --> 00:00:50,480 Alexa, put on 90.1. 2 00:00:50,480 --> 00:00:51,790 Got it. 3 00:00:51,920 --> 00:00:53,870 Now playing radio station 90.1 FM. 4 00:01:02,490 --> 00:01:04,280 - What the fuck? 5 00:01:06,710 --> 00:01:08,540 Mom, something's wrong with my favorite show. 6 00:01:08,670 --> 00:01:09,850 It's just, like, static. 7 00:01:09,930 --> 00:01:11,150 - Your favorite show? 8 00:01:11,150 --> 00:01:13,460 Yeah, NPR, National Public Radio, 9 00:01:13,590 --> 00:01:14,770 where all the liberals bitch and whine about stuff. 10 00:01:14,900 --> 00:01:16,110 Something's wrong with it. 11 00:01:16,110 --> 00:01:20,120 - Oh, sweetie, the president canceled NPR. 12 00:01:20,120 --> 00:01:21,950 - What do you mean, the president canceled NPR? 13 00:01:22,030 --> 00:01:23,290 That was, like, the funniest shit ever. 14 00:01:23,300 --> 00:01:25,640 - I don't know what to tell you, hon. 15 00:01:25,650 --> 00:01:27,520 - Oh, my God. 16 00:01:28,610 --> 00:01:29,740 You guys! 17 00:01:29,820 --> 00:01:31,040 You guys are not gonna believe this. 18 00:01:31,170 --> 00:01:34,520 The president of the United States canceled NPR. 19 00:01:34,610 --> 00:01:36,740 - What's NPR? - What's NPR? 20 00:01:36,830 --> 00:01:38,310 The funniest show ever where all the lesbians 21 00:01:38,310 --> 00:01:39,750 and Jews complain about stuff? 22 00:01:39,830 --> 00:01:41,700 The fucking president had it taken off the air! 23 00:01:41,710 --> 00:01:43,400 I mean, who the hell does this president think he is? 24 00:01:43,530 --> 00:01:45,270 The government can't cancel the show. 25 00:01:45,400 --> 00:01:48,150 I mean, what show are they gonna cancel next? 26 00:01:48,280 --> 00:01:49,800 It was seriously the best show. 27 00:01:49,930 --> 00:01:51,630 It had, like, gay rappers from Mexico all sad 28 00:01:51,760 --> 00:01:53,280 because girls in Pakistan got stoned to death. 29 00:01:53,410 --> 00:01:54,500 And guess why they got stoned to death? 30 00:01:54,500 --> 00:01:55,810 'Cause they were raped! 31 00:01:55,940 --> 00:01:57,980 It was hilarious. Why would anyone cancel that? 32 00:01:57,980 --> 00:01:59,160 I don't know about you, but I'm worried about 33 00:01:59,290 --> 00:02:00,290 what this country's coming to. 34 00:02:00,290 --> 00:02:01,590 It seems like everybody's changing 35 00:02:01,730 --> 00:02:03,420 and suddenly woke stuff is off limits. 36 00:02:03,420 --> 00:02:04,990 I mean, it's like now everyone rips on the Jews, 37 00:02:05,120 --> 00:02:05,950 and it's totally fine. 38 00:02:06,080 --> 00:02:07,120 Huh, Kyle? 39 00:02:09,390 --> 00:02:10,340 See? 40 00:02:10,340 --> 00:02:11,560 What's wrong with Kyle? 41 00:02:11,650 --> 00:02:13,170 Everybody's given up. 42 00:02:13,170 --> 00:02:14,650 Attention, students. 43 00:02:14,650 --> 00:02:17,650 There will be a mandatory assembly this morning. 44 00:02:17,780 --> 00:02:20,920 All students report to the gym, mkay? 45 00:02:20,920 --> 00:02:22,570 - Oh, boy, PC Principal. 46 00:02:22,570 --> 00:02:24,230 He's not given up. 47 00:02:27,010 --> 00:02:28,400 - All right, everyone, listen up. 48 00:02:29,190 --> 00:02:30,540 Everybody, quiet! 49 00:02:32,020 --> 00:02:34,240 There's some bull crap going on in this country, 50 00:02:34,240 --> 00:02:35,590 and I am not going to let it corrupt 51 00:02:35,670 --> 00:02:37,150 the environment at this school! 52 00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:39,070 - Oh, here we go. 53 00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:40,590 - Now, I don't know about you, but I'm sick and tired 54 00:02:40,590 --> 00:02:41,590 of the way people are treated 55 00:02:41,680 --> 00:02:43,460 and mocked for being compassionate. 56 00:02:43,590 --> 00:02:45,640 It is out of control! 57 00:02:45,640 --> 00:02:47,900 There's only one thing that can bring some normality 58 00:02:48,030 --> 00:02:49,640 back to these corrupt times. 59 00:02:49,770 --> 00:02:51,770 And that is... 60 00:02:51,780 --> 00:02:53,560 our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. 61 00:02:55,130 --> 00:02:56,470 - What? 62 00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:58,910 This school has traded truth for comfort 63 00:02:59,040 --> 00:03:01,440 and worships idols of self and sin. 64 00:03:01,440 --> 00:03:03,610 We were a nation under God, but now we spit in His face 65 00:03:03,610 --> 00:03:05,400 and wonder why everything's falling apart. 66 00:03:05,400 --> 00:03:06,620 There's only one way back-- 67 00:03:06,620 --> 00:03:08,830 repent, bow to Christ, 68 00:03:08,840 --> 00:03:11,620 or be swept away with the rest of the godless lies. 69 00:03:11,620 --> 00:03:13,670 - What the hell, dude? 70 00:03:13,800 --> 00:03:15,670 - In order to turn things around, 71 00:03:15,800 --> 00:03:18,670 I'm going to be a Power Christian Principal. 72 00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:21,060 You can call me PC Principal. 73 00:03:21,070 --> 00:03:23,460 So now, I'd like you all to put your hands together 74 00:03:23,590 --> 00:03:26,200 in welcoming Christ our Lord. 75 00:03:29,730 --> 00:03:31,420 - Hello, my children. 76 00:03:31,510 --> 00:03:34,470 I am the light and the way. 77 00:03:34,600 --> 00:03:36,950 Fellas, what the fuck is going on? 78 00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:39,340 - Yea, it is wonderful to be here, 79 00:03:39,480 --> 00:03:42,220 for where two or three gather in my name, 80 00:03:42,300 --> 00:03:44,220 there am I with them. 81 00:03:44,310 --> 00:03:45,260 - That's right! 82 00:03:45,390 --> 00:03:46,530 That's right. Let's go, Jesus. 83 00:03:46,660 --> 00:03:47,790 Fuck yeah! 84 00:03:56,620 --> 00:03:57,880 - So how was your day, guys? 85 00:03:57,970 --> 00:04:00,230 Anything fun happen at school? 86 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:01,890 - No, not really. 87 00:04:01,890 --> 00:04:03,590 Uh, Jesus showed up. 88 00:04:05,110 --> 00:04:06,630 - Jesus? 89 00:04:06,630 --> 00:04:08,940 - Yeah. 90 00:04:09,070 --> 00:04:11,250 - What's Jesus doing in your school? 91 00:04:11,330 --> 00:04:12,680 - I don't know. 92 00:04:14,550 --> 00:04:17,210 - I don't think Jesus is allowed to be in schools. 93 00:04:17,210 --> 00:04:19,040 - Yeah, well, he was there. 94 00:04:20,340 --> 00:04:23,650 - Well, I think I'm gonna have to talk to somebody about this. 95 00:04:23,650 --> 00:04:25,130 Hey, uh, how's it going? 96 00:04:25,220 --> 00:04:28,740 Um, is Jesus supposed to be allowed in schools? 97 00:04:32,530 --> 00:04:34,570 Generally, the idea is that public schools 98 00:04:34,570 --> 00:04:36,880 have to maintain a separation of church and state, 99 00:04:36,880 --> 00:04:38,750 so they can't promote any one religion. 100 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:40,320 - Yeah, that's what I thought. 101 00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:43,100 The government can't force a religion on my son. 102 00:04:43,100 --> 00:04:44,710 Public schools can teach about religions 103 00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:46,670 in a neutral educational way, 104 00:04:46,800 --> 00:04:48,940 but they can't endorse any particular one. 105 00:04:49,020 --> 00:04:51,680 Was it a lesson on all world religions? 106 00:04:51,810 --> 00:04:53,240 - Uh, no. 107 00:04:53,380 --> 00:04:56,070 My son said that Jesus was literally at his school. 108 00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:01,860 Then you're probably right to be concerned. 109 00:05:01,990 --> 00:05:04,170 It's good you're looking out for your son's education. 110 00:05:04,300 --> 00:05:05,730 - Thanks. 111 00:05:05,740 --> 00:05:06,950 It's really nice to have someone 112 00:05:06,950 --> 00:05:08,560 to talk to about all this. 113 00:05:08,690 --> 00:05:10,570 No worries. 114 00:05:10,570 --> 00:05:11,740 Let me know if there's any other way I can help. 115 00:05:11,740 --> 00:05:12,740 I'm always here. 116 00:05:12,830 --> 00:05:14,440 - You're so awesome. Thanks. 117 00:05:16,350 --> 00:05:17,360 Good night, honey. 118 00:05:17,490 --> 00:05:18,960 Have a great sleep, 119 00:05:18,970 --> 00:05:20,970 and I'm sure you'll do more amazing things tomorrow. 120 00:05:20,970 --> 00:05:23,100 - Ah. 121 00:05:33,590 --> 00:05:35,110 - Butters! - Ahh! 122 00:05:35,110 --> 00:05:36,720 - Butters, get over here. 123 00:05:36,720 --> 00:05:38,380 What did I tell you, man? This shit is wack! 124 00:05:38,510 --> 00:05:39,860 PC Principal? 125 00:05:39,990 --> 00:05:41,210 If he's changed, then there's no hope! 126 00:05:43,210 --> 00:05:45,300 I think I know what's happening. 127 00:05:45,300 --> 00:05:46,780 I think woke is dead. 128 00:05:49,080 --> 00:05:50,560 - Woke is dead? 129 00:05:50,560 --> 00:05:52,610 - It's dead, Butters. It's gone! 130 00:05:52,610 --> 00:05:54,780 You can just say retarded now. Nobody cares. 131 00:05:54,870 --> 00:05:56,000 Everyone hates the Jews. 132 00:05:56,090 --> 00:05:58,050 Everyone's fine with using gay slurs. 133 00:05:58,180 --> 00:05:59,440 - Oh. Well, that's not good. 134 00:05:59,570 --> 00:06:01,230 - No, it's terrible! 135 00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:03,790 'Cause now I don't know... 136 00:06:03,790 --> 00:06:05,400 what I'm supposed to do. 137 00:06:11,760 --> 00:06:13,980 - Eric? 138 00:06:19,980 --> 00:06:21,250 More protests today 139 00:06:21,330 --> 00:06:23,030 as the government pushes harder for Christianity 140 00:06:23,030 --> 00:06:24,860 in our nation's schools. 141 00:06:24,860 --> 00:06:27,560 The president stated earlier today that the spirit of Jesus 142 00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:29,120 is important to our country, 143 00:06:29,250 --> 00:06:31,860 and he will sue anyone who doesn't agree with him. 144 00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:34,260 - What the hell is this president doing? 145 00:06:34,350 --> 00:06:36,090 He doesn't even act like a Christian. 146 00:06:36,220 --> 00:06:37,830 Why is he pushing it on our kids? 147 00:06:37,910 --> 00:06:40,220 - I told you this was all gonna be bad, 148 00:06:40,220 --> 00:06:42,000 but a lot of you here voted for him. 149 00:06:42,010 --> 00:06:43,440 - Yeah, I voted for him, 150 00:06:43,440 --> 00:06:45,750 but all I've seen him do is arrest and sue people. 151 00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:48,490 - I voted for him to get rid of all the woke stuff. 152 00:06:48,490 --> 00:06:50,620 But now that retarded faggot is just putting money 153 00:06:50,710 --> 00:06:51,880 in his own pockets. 154 00:06:52,020 --> 00:06:53,060 - Yeah! - That's right! 155 00:06:53,060 --> 00:06:54,500 - Are we just gonna sit here 156 00:06:54,500 --> 00:06:56,060 and let him break every rule of freedom? 157 00:06:56,150 --> 00:06:57,020 - No! - No way! 158 00:06:57,150 --> 00:06:58,280 - Well, come on! 159 00:06:58,370 --> 00:06:59,370 Let's go get that son of a bitch. 160 00:06:59,370 --> 00:07:02,330 Yeah! 161 00:07:02,460 --> 00:07:03,460 - Yeah! 162 00:07:03,460 --> 00:07:04,590 Come on! Come on, let's go get him! 163 00:07:04,590 --> 00:07:06,290 - Come on, let's get him! 164 00:07:06,380 --> 00:07:08,810 - Let's go get him! - Come on, let's get him! 165 00:07:10,640 --> 00:07:12,250 - Come on out, you piece of shit. 166 00:07:12,380 --> 00:07:13,780 We're unelecting you. 167 00:07:21,260 --> 00:07:23,570 - Excuse me. Do you mind? 168 00:07:25,920 --> 00:07:27,960 - What the hell do you think you're doing, Garrison? 169 00:07:29,880 --> 00:07:32,100 - I'm not doing anything. 170 00:07:32,190 --> 00:07:33,840 - Oh, so you haven't been looting the country 171 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:35,100 and ruling by fear 172 00:07:35,190 --> 00:07:38,100 like some Middle Eastern tinpot dictator? 173 00:07:38,100 --> 00:07:39,980 - No, I've been sitting here 174 00:07:40,110 --> 00:07:41,800 watching "White Lotus" with Rick. 175 00:07:44,680 --> 00:07:46,110 - But you got re-elected. 176 00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:48,680 - He hasn't been back to Washington in years. 177 00:07:48,680 --> 00:07:49,990 He gave all that up. 178 00:07:50,120 --> 00:07:51,340 He's been really good. 179 00:07:53,250 --> 00:07:55,470 - But if he's here, 180 00:07:55,470 --> 00:07:57,520 then who's the retarded faggot 181 00:07:57,650 --> 00:07:59,690 in the White House? 182 00:08:03,260 --> 00:08:04,480 Uh-huh. 183 00:08:04,570 --> 00:08:06,050 Yeah. 184 00:08:06,130 --> 00:08:07,870 OK. 185 00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:10,570 - Mr. President, sir, the prime minister of Canada 186 00:08:10,700 --> 00:08:12,010 is here to see you. 187 00:08:12,140 --> 00:08:14,100 - Mr. President, why are you placing 188 00:08:14,100 --> 00:08:15,790 these new tariffs on Canada? 189 00:08:15,790 --> 00:08:18,060 What are you, some kind of dictator from the Middle East? 190 00:08:20,320 --> 00:08:22,230 - A dictator from the Middle East? 191 00:08:22,240 --> 00:08:23,980 Hey, relax, guy. 192 00:08:24,110 --> 00:08:26,460 I'm just your average Joe. Take a rest. 193 00:08:26,590 --> 00:08:28,980 - The people of Canada will not be devalued like this. 194 00:08:29,110 --> 00:08:30,460 - Aw, come on. 195 00:08:30,590 --> 00:08:32,680 You don't want me to bomb you like I did Iraq. 196 00:08:32,680 --> 00:08:34,770 - I thought you just bombed Iran. 197 00:08:34,770 --> 00:08:36,290 Iran, Iraq--what the hell's the difference? 198 00:08:36,290 --> 00:08:37,820 Relax, guy. 199 00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:41,990 Hey! Hey! 200 00:08:42,130 --> 00:08:43,650 What the fuck is this, buddy? 201 00:08:43,780 --> 00:08:46,260 - This is the painting you asked for, sir. 202 00:08:46,390 --> 00:08:47,960 - Why is my dick so small? 203 00:08:47,960 --> 00:08:50,350 - But that's the size it is in the photo. 204 00:08:50,350 --> 00:08:51,740 - Get this guy out of here! 205 00:08:51,740 --> 00:08:52,920 I'm gonna sue you! 206 00:08:52,920 --> 00:08:54,270 I'm gonna sue both of you. 207 00:08:54,270 --> 00:08:55,310 Ha-ha-ha-ha! 208 00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:01,800 Nobody makes fun of me and gets away with it. 209 00:09:04,630 --> 00:09:06,370 Hey, Satan! 210 00:09:07,410 --> 00:09:08,760 - I don't want to right now. 211 00:09:08,850 --> 00:09:10,940 - What? Hey, relax. 212 00:09:11,070 --> 00:09:12,980 Come on, Satan. I've been working hard all day. 213 00:09:13,070 --> 00:09:14,680 - You haven't been working. 214 00:09:14,810 --> 00:09:16,860 You've been doing your stupid memes and just fuckin' around. 215 00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:18,200 - Come here, guy. 216 00:09:18,340 --> 00:09:19,640 Aw, come on, Satan. 217 00:09:19,770 --> 00:09:21,560 You know you can't resist this. 218 00:09:23,210 --> 00:09:25,520 - I can't even see anything, it's so small. 219 00:09:25,520 --> 00:09:27,170 - Hey! I'll fucking sue you! 220 00:09:27,300 --> 00:09:29,220 - God, fuck you! 221 00:09:29,300 --> 00:09:30,520 - Aw, come on, Satan. 222 00:09:30,520 --> 00:09:31,700 Don't be like that. 223 00:10:20,010 --> 00:10:20,920 - Eric? 224 00:10:22,830 --> 00:10:24,140 Come on, Eric. 225 00:10:24,270 --> 00:10:26,490 You--you can't keep doing this to yourself. 226 00:10:26,620 --> 00:10:29,490 - I used to laugh, Butters. 227 00:10:29,620 --> 00:10:31,450 I used to have fun. 228 00:10:31,450 --> 00:10:33,190 But now they've taken that away. 229 00:10:35,280 --> 00:10:38,500 I'm not special anymore. 230 00:10:38,500 --> 00:10:40,900 So what's the point in me even existing? 231 00:10:41,030 --> 00:10:42,460 - Eric, what are you saying? 232 00:10:42,460 --> 00:10:45,900 - I'm saying that it's the end, Butters. 233 00:10:46,030 --> 00:10:47,730 I'm gonna kill myself, 234 00:10:47,860 --> 00:10:49,250 and you. 235 00:10:50,250 --> 00:10:51,250 - Wait, me? 236 00:10:51,250 --> 00:10:52,820 - It's a suicide pact, Butters. 237 00:10:52,820 --> 00:10:54,040 It's just best we end it now. 238 00:10:54,040 --> 00:10:55,260 - No, Eric, listen to me. 239 00:10:55,390 --> 00:10:56,870 Woke isn't dead. 240 00:10:56,870 --> 00:10:58,520 It's still out there, somewhere, 241 00:10:58,650 --> 00:11:00,220 just waiting to come back. 242 00:11:00,350 --> 00:11:02,700 - It's not coming back. - It's waiting to come back! 243 00:11:02,700 --> 00:11:04,920 It's like a little tiny light that's gonna shine again. 244 00:11:05,050 --> 00:11:06,440 You just gotta give it some time. 245 00:11:07,620 --> 00:11:09,270 I hope you're right, Butters. 246 00:11:09,270 --> 00:11:12,270 But if it doesn't come back by, like, Tuesday, 247 00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:13,670 I'm killing us both. 248 00:11:18,630 --> 00:11:21,070 - Mr. Marsh, I've called you into my office 249 00:11:21,070 --> 00:11:23,070 because I understand that you have a problem 250 00:11:23,070 --> 00:11:25,510 with Jesus in our schools. 251 00:11:27,640 --> 00:11:29,550 - I don't have a problem with it. 252 00:11:29,550 --> 00:11:31,160 I mean, I think it's kind of weird. 253 00:11:31,160 --> 00:11:33,210 - Well, Mr. Mackey says you were bullying Jesus 254 00:11:33,210 --> 00:11:36,340 and wouldn't let him sit at your table in the cafeteria. 255 00:11:36,340 --> 00:11:38,130 - What? I didn't bully him. 256 00:11:38,210 --> 00:11:40,560 Craig told him our table was full, which it was. 257 00:11:40,650 --> 00:11:43,000 - Mr. Marsh, Christ died for your sins, and he loves us all. 258 00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:45,570 There's only one truth, one cross, and one savior. 259 00:11:45,660 --> 00:11:47,270 And you will find him in your heart. 260 00:11:48,790 --> 00:11:49,920 - PC Principal? 261 00:11:49,920 --> 00:11:51,790 - Power Christian Principal, yes? 262 00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:53,010 - What happened? 263 00:11:54,450 --> 00:11:56,890 - What--what happened with what? 264 00:11:57,020 --> 00:11:58,930 - Well, you used to be, like, super woke. 265 00:11:59,020 --> 00:12:00,540 And then starting last November, 266 00:12:00,670 --> 00:12:02,110 you started acting weird. 267 00:12:02,110 --> 00:12:04,590 And now you're super Christian. 268 00:12:04,590 --> 00:12:10,030 - I just realized that the side I was on was hopeless. 269 00:12:10,120 --> 00:12:12,940 And in times of hopelessness, one finds Christ. 270 00:12:12,940 --> 00:12:15,030 Come to him, all who are heavy laden, 271 00:12:15,030 --> 00:12:17,380 and he shall give you rest. - And I shall give you rest. 272 00:12:17,510 --> 00:12:18,820 - Dude, what's going on? 273 00:12:18,910 --> 00:12:20,210 Like, none of this seems normal. 274 00:12:20,340 --> 00:12:21,560 - That's the kind of attitude 275 00:12:21,560 --> 00:12:23,390 we are not gonna tolerate at this school! 276 00:12:23,390 --> 00:12:25,390 And, Mr. Marsh, if you don't accept Christ, 277 00:12:25,390 --> 00:12:27,920 then I'm gonna have to expel you. 278 00:12:28,050 --> 00:12:29,830 - K, I'm pretty sure you can't do that. 279 00:12:29,960 --> 00:12:31,350 Like, I think that's illegal. 280 00:12:31,350 --> 00:12:33,310 - No, Mr. Marsh, it's not illegal anymore. 281 00:12:33,310 --> 00:12:35,360 This is 2025, K? 282 00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:36,620 And not much is illegal. 283 00:12:39,620 --> 00:12:40,800 - I accept Christ into my heart. 284 00:12:40,930 --> 00:12:42,540 - And into your school. 285 00:12:42,630 --> 00:12:43,850 - And in my school. 286 00:12:43,930 --> 00:12:45,240 - And at your table in the cafeteria. 287 00:12:45,370 --> 00:12:47,850 - There wasn't any room at my table--ah. 288 00:12:47,980 --> 00:12:49,760 And at my table in the cafeteria. 289 00:12:49,850 --> 00:12:52,030 - Yay. 290 00:13:17,750 --> 00:13:19,450 - Mr. President, a lot of your supporters 291 00:13:19,530 --> 00:13:20,880 are starting to turn against you. 292 00:13:21,010 --> 00:13:22,930 - Hey, tell them to take a rest. 293 00:13:23,060 --> 00:13:24,670 - Sir, can you please talk to them? 294 00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:26,410 They're really riled up. 295 00:13:26,410 --> 00:13:27,670 - All right, give me that. 296 00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:29,670 Hey, relax, guys. 297 00:13:29,670 --> 00:13:32,150 - Yeah, hi, uh, what do you think you're doing? 298 00:13:32,280 --> 00:13:34,460 Our children are being told that they have to sit 299 00:13:34,460 --> 00:13:35,980 with Jesus at lunchtime. 300 00:13:36,110 --> 00:13:37,990 - Listen, buddy, you just need to relax. 301 00:13:38,120 --> 00:13:39,470 All this protesting makes me look bad. 302 00:13:39,600 --> 00:13:40,990 Just take a rest. 303 00:13:41,120 --> 00:13:42,900 - Well, no, we're not gonna give it a rest. 304 00:13:42,990 --> 00:13:44,430 All the people here in South Park 305 00:13:44,430 --> 00:13:46,340 want some goddamn answers. 306 00:13:46,470 --> 00:13:48,600 - All right, then I'm gonna sue your whole town. 307 00:13:48,610 --> 00:13:50,870 You got that? $5 billion. 308 00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:52,610 Ha-ha-ha-ha! 309 00:13:53,830 --> 00:13:55,480 - What'd he say? 310 00:13:55,570 --> 00:13:57,920 - He said he's suing us for $5 billion. 311 00:14:00,660 --> 00:14:01,920 - Fucking stupid idiots. 312 00:14:02,010 --> 00:14:03,790 Think they can mess with me, huh? 313 00:14:06,580 --> 00:14:08,150 Hey, Satan. 314 00:14:08,280 --> 00:14:10,100 - I'm not in the mood right now. 315 00:14:10,110 --> 00:14:12,670 Another random bitch commented on my Instagram 316 00:14:12,670 --> 00:14:14,370 that you're on the Epstein list. 317 00:14:14,500 --> 00:14:15,670 - The Epstein list? 318 00:14:15,680 --> 00:14:17,110 Are we still talking "aboot" that? 319 00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:19,030 - Well, are you on the list or not? 320 00:14:19,160 --> 00:14:20,680 It's weird that whenever it comes up, 321 00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:22,510 you just tell everyone to relax. 322 00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:24,420 - I'm not telling everyone to relax. 323 00:14:24,420 --> 00:14:26,120 Relax, guy! 324 00:14:26,250 --> 00:14:28,600 - No, I need counseling. 325 00:14:28,730 --> 00:14:30,520 You remind me more and more of this other guy 326 00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:32,520 I used to date, like, a lot. 327 00:14:32,610 --> 00:14:35,040 Like, you guys are exactly alike. 328 00:14:38,180 --> 00:14:40,090 - I love you. 329 00:14:40,090 --> 00:14:41,480 - Ugh. 330 00:14:41,610 --> 00:14:43,230 Come on, Satan. 331 00:14:46,140 --> 00:14:47,660 - Vroom! Pew! 332 00:14:47,750 --> 00:14:48,840 Oh, no! 333 00:14:48,970 --> 00:14:50,410 Vroom! 334 00:14:50,410 --> 00:14:52,800 - Butters, honey, your little friend Cartman is here. 335 00:14:52,930 --> 00:14:55,110 He said it's Tuesday, and you guys have plans. 336 00:14:56,670 --> 00:14:57,540 Eric? 337 00:14:57,670 --> 00:14:58,940 Oh, no. 338 00:14:58,940 --> 00:15:01,370 Well, um, can you tell him I'm not home? 339 00:15:01,500 --> 00:15:04,120 - Butters, don't be antisocial. 340 00:15:04,200 --> 00:15:05,860 Go play with your friend. 341 00:15:05,990 --> 00:15:08,640 He's out in the garage playing in our car with a hose. 342 00:15:09,640 --> 00:15:10,560 - Oh, no! 343 00:15:15,780 --> 00:15:17,740 Oh, God, Eric! 344 00:15:18,910 --> 00:15:20,000 - Hey, Butters, come on in. 345 00:15:20,130 --> 00:15:22,390 - Eric, no! Get out of there! 346 00:15:22,530 --> 00:15:23,350 - That side's locked, Butters. 347 00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:24,920 You gotta get on the other side. 348 00:15:27,970 --> 00:15:29,270 - Eric, you don't have to do this! 349 00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:30,230 - Close the door, Butters! - You can't give up-- 350 00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:31,360 - You're letting all the fumes out! 351 00:15:31,360 --> 00:15:33,540 Shut the fucking door! - OK, fine! 352 00:15:33,540 --> 00:15:35,360 You can't just give up like everyone else has. 353 00:15:35,450 --> 00:15:36,630 - Butters, it's over. 354 00:15:36,760 --> 00:15:37,890 You really wanna sit around for weeks 355 00:15:37,890 --> 00:15:39,580 waiting for a slow demise? 356 00:15:39,590 --> 00:15:41,110 - Well, no. - Well, neither do I! 357 00:15:41,110 --> 00:15:42,460 This is taking too long. 358 00:15:43,680 --> 00:15:45,030 Here you go, Butters. 359 00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:46,680 Buckle up. We're in for the last ride. 360 00:15:48,250 --> 00:15:50,120 - All right, fine. 361 00:15:51,730 --> 00:15:53,820 - Suck it in, Butters. 362 00:15:53,900 --> 00:15:55,380 We're heading for that big woke kingdom in the sky. 363 00:15:55,380 --> 00:15:56,950 - OK, then. 364 00:16:03,830 --> 00:16:05,520 This is "60 Minutes." 365 00:16:05,610 --> 00:16:06,960 Oh, boy. 366 00:16:06,960 --> 00:16:08,140 Oh, shit. 367 00:16:09,350 --> 00:16:11,440 Uh, oh, God. 368 00:16:11,570 --> 00:16:13,920 The small town of South Park, Colorado 369 00:16:14,060 --> 00:16:16,360 is protesting against the president. 370 00:16:16,360 --> 00:16:18,410 The townspeople claim that the president-- 371 00:16:18,410 --> 00:16:19,970 who is a great man-- 372 00:16:19,970 --> 00:16:21,410 - A great man. - Great guy. 373 00:16:21,500 --> 00:16:22,890 We know he's probably watching. 374 00:16:23,020 --> 00:16:26,410 And, uh, we are just reporting on this town in Colorado 375 00:16:26,420 --> 00:16:28,240 that's being sued by the president 376 00:16:28,370 --> 00:16:30,030 and they are fighting back. 377 00:16:30,030 --> 00:16:31,720 - And just to be clear, we don't agree with them. 378 00:16:31,720 --> 00:16:33,120 - No, no, no, no. 379 00:16:33,250 --> 00:16:35,080 We think these protesters are total retards. 380 00:16:35,210 --> 00:16:37,300 But our own Jim Conner has more. 381 00:16:37,430 --> 00:16:39,650 - Uh--oh, God. 382 00:16:39,730 --> 00:16:42,170 Uh--uh, Tom, I'm here with the townspeople 383 00:16:42,170 --> 00:16:43,650 speaking out against the president. 384 00:16:43,740 --> 00:16:45,740 It all started when a father got upset 385 00:16:45,870 --> 00:16:48,480 that Jesus was being forced on his son at school. 386 00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:51,000 Young Stan Marsh is questioning the president's policies. 387 00:16:51,010 --> 00:16:52,700 I don't know. 388 00:16:52,830 --> 00:16:53,960 You know, I don't know why he's questioning the president. 389 00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:55,880 He's probably a faggot or something. 390 00:16:55,970 --> 00:16:59,490 But the townspeople say they owe the president nothing. 391 00:16:59,620 --> 00:17:02,320 - We aren't gonna be told what to do by anyone. 392 00:17:02,410 --> 00:17:04,540 - We all know the woke stuff went too far, 393 00:17:04,670 --> 00:17:07,330 but the answer isn't going too far the other way. 394 00:17:07,410 --> 00:17:10,150 - It's not a bad thing to have a little compassion for people. 395 00:17:10,290 --> 00:17:12,980 It's not a bad thing to care a little for the environment. 396 00:17:13,110 --> 00:17:14,460 The Stotch family is proud to say 397 00:17:14,550 --> 00:17:16,810 that we own an electric car. 398 00:17:25,430 --> 00:17:27,870 - Boy, this sure is taking a long time. 399 00:17:27,870 --> 00:17:30,350 - Yeah, the human body does everything it can 400 00:17:30,480 --> 00:17:32,650 in the final stages to try and cling to life. 401 00:17:32,660 --> 00:17:34,570 Shouldn't be much longer now. 402 00:17:34,700 --> 00:17:35,920 Things are really heating up 403 00:17:36,010 --> 00:17:37,750 in the small town of South Park. 404 00:17:37,880 --> 00:17:40,660 More and more citizens are uniting in solidarity 405 00:17:40,790 --> 00:17:43,530 against what they call the president's oppression. 406 00:17:43,540 --> 00:17:46,280 The townspeople are saying things are never hopeless, 407 00:17:46,280 --> 00:17:48,110 that they must all stand strong 408 00:17:48,240 --> 00:17:49,370 for what they believe in. 409 00:17:49,500 --> 00:17:51,760 - We're in this for the long haul, guys. 410 00:17:51,890 --> 00:17:53,590 This is about what's right. 411 00:17:53,720 --> 00:17:57,290 And we will fight, even if we have to do it alone. 412 00:18:00,470 --> 00:18:02,470 - Wait, we don't have to do it alone. 413 00:18:02,470 --> 00:18:03,690 Look! 414 00:18:07,040 --> 00:18:08,650 It's Jesus! 415 00:18:14,040 --> 00:18:15,350 - Let us break bread. 416 00:18:15,480 --> 00:18:17,830 Break bread with me. 417 00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:21,270 This is my body, given for you. 418 00:18:21,270 --> 00:18:23,920 Do this in remembrance of me. 419 00:18:27,540 --> 00:18:29,890 Now just eat the bread, and listen. 420 00:18:31,840 --> 00:18:34,460 I didn't wanna come back and be in the school, 421 00:18:34,590 --> 00:18:37,420 but I had to because it was part of a lawsuit 422 00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:39,460 and the agreement with Paramount. 423 00:18:40,810 --> 00:18:42,420 - The president's suing you? 424 00:18:42,420 --> 00:18:44,330 - The guy can do whatever he wants now 425 00:18:44,340 --> 00:18:46,210 that someone backed down, OK? 426 00:18:46,340 --> 00:18:47,770 Eat the bread. Eat the bread. 427 00:18:49,170 --> 00:18:51,340 You guys saw what happened to CBS? 428 00:18:51,340 --> 00:18:53,390 Yeah, well, guess who owns CBS? 429 00:18:53,520 --> 00:18:55,000 Paramount! 430 00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:57,000 Do you really wanna end up like Colbert? 431 00:18:57,090 --> 00:19:00,180 You guys gotta stop being stupid. 432 00:19:00,310 --> 00:19:02,220 We can't understand you. 433 00:19:02,310 --> 00:19:03,530 Just shut up, 434 00:19:03,530 --> 00:19:06,010 or we're going to get canceled, you idiots. 435 00:19:06,100 --> 00:19:07,440 What the hell is he saying? 436 00:19:07,450 --> 00:19:10,540 - Tom, they're calling it the Sermon on the Mount. 437 00:19:10,670 --> 00:19:13,670 Hundreds of South Park faithful are flocking to the area 438 00:19:13,670 --> 00:19:17,450 where Jesus Christ continues to speak his words of wisdom. 439 00:19:17,460 --> 00:19:19,500 - If someone has the power of the presidency 440 00:19:19,630 --> 00:19:22,290 and also has the power to sue and take bribes, 441 00:19:22,420 --> 00:19:25,380 then he can do anything to anyone! 442 00:19:25,380 --> 00:19:27,460 It's the fucking president, dude. 443 00:19:27,470 --> 00:19:30,160 All of you, shut the fuck up, or South Park is over. 444 00:19:30,250 --> 00:19:31,600 It's fucking over. 445 00:19:31,690 --> 00:19:33,730 Just stop and shut the fuck up. 446 00:19:36,210 --> 00:19:37,690 Ye--yes, sir. 447 00:19:37,690 --> 00:19:39,350 OK. 448 00:19:39,350 --> 00:19:40,830 Absolutely. 449 00:19:40,910 --> 00:19:42,390 Yes, thank you, Mr. President. 450 00:19:42,480 --> 00:19:44,350 We'll be happy to pay that, sir. 451 00:19:44,350 --> 00:19:45,570 Yes, sir. I-- 452 00:19:45,570 --> 00:19:48,230 I will relax, and I'll take a rest. 453 00:19:48,360 --> 00:19:49,180 Yes, thank you. 454 00:19:49,180 --> 00:19:50,310 Thank you very much. 455 00:19:52,190 --> 00:19:53,620 OK, we settled. 456 00:19:53,620 --> 00:19:54,970 - Oh, we settled. 457 00:19:55,060 --> 00:19:56,280 Thank God. 458 00:19:56,280 --> 00:19:59,370 I got the president down to $3.5 million. 459 00:19:59,500 --> 00:20:01,800 - $3.5 million? That's--that's not so bad. 460 00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:03,680 - That's really fair. I think that's fair. 461 00:20:03,810 --> 00:20:05,330 We'll just have to cut some funding 462 00:20:05,460 --> 00:20:07,850 for our schools and hospitals and roads, 463 00:20:07,850 --> 00:20:09,640 and that should be that. - Yeah. 464 00:20:10,940 --> 00:20:13,080 - Yeah, well, that's not quite all. 465 00:20:13,160 --> 00:20:15,510 As part of the settlement, we also had to agree 466 00:20:15,640 --> 00:20:18,690 to doing pro-Trump messaging. 467 00:20:18,690 --> 00:20:20,870 - How are we supposed to do pro-Trump messaging? 468 00:20:20,870 --> 00:20:22,220 - Oh, come on, guys. 469 00:20:22,220 --> 00:20:23,260 We're South Park! 470 00:20:23,390 --> 00:20:24,480 We can do it. 471 00:20:24,610 --> 00:20:25,920 - Yeah. All right. - He's right. 472 00:20:26,050 --> 00:20:27,870 - We just gotta work together. - Yeah! 473 00:20:27,960 --> 00:20:29,440 - All right! - Yeah! Yeah! 474 00:20:34,710 --> 00:20:37,010 Who walked through the desert for you? 475 00:20:39,670 --> 00:20:41,500 Who survived the wilderness 476 00:20:41,630 --> 00:20:44,590 and gave the ultimate sacrifice? 477 00:20:44,720 --> 00:20:48,420 When things heat up, who will deliver us from temptation? 478 00:20:50,980 --> 00:20:53,290 Donald J. Trump. 479 00:20:54,860 --> 00:20:58,560 No matter how hot it gets, 480 00:20:58,640 --> 00:21:02,130 he's not afraid to fight for America. 481 00:21:03,650 --> 00:21:06,960 With conviction, discipline, and trust in God, 482 00:21:07,090 --> 00:21:09,440 he survived the desert. 483 00:21:18,970 --> 00:21:21,280 I'm Donald J. Trump, and I endorse this message. 484 00:21:23,760 --> 00:21:25,020 Trump-- 485 00:21:25,150 --> 00:21:27,500 his penis is teeny tiny, 486 00:21:27,590 --> 00:21:30,330 but his love for us is large. 487 00:21:45,120 --> 00:21:48,170 - Oh, I think I might be going. 488 00:21:48,260 --> 00:21:50,570 Yep, sweet death is about to come. 489 00:21:50,700 --> 00:21:51,520 I love you, man. 34665

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