Original subtitles

Emergency, danger, crisis, peril, doomsday, calamity,

disaster, catastrophe.

Ray! Yeah, Ray!

Ray, where are you?

Ray!

Hey!

Charlotte, have you seen Ray? No, where is he?

I don't know. Well, he's got to be around here somewhere.

Ray! Ray!

Ray!

What? Who wants a snack?

What? Who wants a snack?

Dude. Let me.

Hey. Hey.

It's 10 after midnight.

Yeah.

Why'd you send us all the doomsday signal?

Because I wanted to make sure you guys all came over.

Dude. What?

Dude! Yeah?

Dude! Hey.

You told us that the doomsday signal was only for a major crisis.

A life or death situation?

Well, you are gonna die. We are.

When you try my new recipe for... Captain Corndogs!

Captain Corndogs? Yeah!

So you called us all here just to try your new Captain Corndogs? Uh, yeah.

This is not a life or death... situation.

Yeah, it is.

Seriously. It is.

Because I'm going to kill him.

Get down.

I'm going to kill you.

Okay, please let me go.

Sure. Right after you try one of my demon hat. I don't want to try that.

Karnad.

Okay, give me another one.

Oh, my God.

Jasper, Charlotte, you guys got to try these.

If I try one, can I go home?

Sure.

Fine, I'll take one.

Wow. Well, I got to try and meet one of these Kep.

Emergency call.

Now? Geez.

Pretty rude.

They're calls after midnight.

Yeah. Who would be rude enough to call someone after midnight?

Okay, smart pants.

No more Captain Corndogs for you.

Fine. I don't care if I don't get... Okay, I don't care. Can I please have

Corndogs?

Charlotte. Jasper.

Ready?

Oh, thank goodness.

My name is Jerome Sanchez, and I'm the director of the Swellview Museum of

Stools and Jewels.

Stools and Jewels? Yeah, they got the best collection of... Stools and Jewels,

yeah. Look, I need to hire you guys.

Hire us? Hire us for what?

To protect this.

What am I looking at here?

It's looking like maybe like a white rock. That's what they call it. Some

of icy rock.

Guys. Like driveways? Guys. What do you mean driveways? Like the gravel? Or like

the dollar driveways? This is the Neil Diamond.

Oh.

It's the largest uncut diamond on earth. And it's on loan to our museum this

week. And someone just broke in and tried to steal it. That's why the cops

here right now.

Oh. Okay.

So what do you want?

To hire you and Kid Danger to come guard this incredible diamond.

This guy's so dramatic.

I know, I know. Look, sir, have you tried locking the museum at night?

Did you

see that maniac try and steal the Neil Diamond?

Yeah, we get it.

Look, we're only going to have the diamond here one more day, so will you

guard it, please?

Just a second.

All right, I've spoken with my sidekick.

And we'll come guard the Neil Diamond.

Oh, thank you.

If, if you let me bring a bunch of my Captain Corndogs. But I... Would you

regular corn dogs, but they're appetizer size and they taste way, way better?

Way better.

And you have to say it's okay for me to pass out my Captain Corn Dogs to anyone

who comes to the museum.

So

we

got a deal?

Yes! Deal!

All right, let's snack on some Captain Corn.

There was nothing I could do.

It all just kind of happened. I wanted an after -school job, but then an

indestructible superhero hired me to be his sidekick. Now we blow bubbles and

fight crime.

Feels good.

Hey there.

Oh, like that antique stool, huh?

Well, Well, I see you two aren't much for conversation, so... Why don't you

one of my Captain Corndogs, huh?

Go on.

Go on.

Uh... Uh... Speechless.

So, we're seeing a live feed of what Ray and Henry are seeing right now? Yeah.

See, I installed a teeny little camera into their mouth, right here, between

their eyeballs.

I can zoom in on this lady that Ray is talking to.

And this controls the facial recognition?

Right.

Okay.

Lauren Fillmore, no criminal history.

Whoa, that's really cool technology.

Yeah, I know this.

Wow. Gorgeous.

Yeah. Fantastic necklace.

Oh, uh... I, uh... Actually, I wasn't talking about the necklace.

Oh. Yeah.

So what were you talking about?

Um... You know... You.

Oh!

Okay.

Okay.

Wow, this is not going well.

Would you like a do -over? Yes, please.

Hi, I'm Kid Danger.

Well, doy, I need that much. Right.

Cool. So, um, do you like coming to this museum for the jewels or the stools?

Oh, I'm definitely a jewels girl. Yeah, I figured.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Why is Henry talking to that girl?

I don't know. Because she's cute. So?

He doesn't need her.

I'm a jewels girl.

So obvious.

What is your deal? I just run her face.

That's what I was doing.

Okay.

Heather Bogart.

Extreme criminal history.

I knew it. I knew she was no good.

I thought she's been arrested so many times.

Yeah, and all of them for stealing precious jewels.

Wait, she stole all those jewels?

Yeah, and it says that she just got released six weeks ago from Gal Katraz

Prison.

I'm contacting Ray right now.

You know, I first had the idea for Captain Corndog's drink. Ray! Ray!

Why,

you nub!

You interrupted me while I was talking to a mom.

Yeah? What about her? She's a jewel thief.

What? Her name's Heather Bogart. She's been in prison like six times for

stealing super expensive rare jewels.

Got it.

I'll handle Heather.

So do you want another Captain Corndog? How could I not?

Captain Head, what are you doing? Stopping a jewel thief. before she

again. Dude, she's not a jewel thief.

Yes, I am. I mean, jeez, man. You don't just shoot a miniature corndog out of a

girl's head. You do. She's a nasty jewel thief, which she is. No, she's not.

Yes, I am. No, you're not. I'm sorry. Say what?

Uh -huh.

Sorry,

you're a... Heather Bogart, master jewel thief.

How you doing?

But you're so pretty.

Forget her, kid.

She's rotten fruit.

What? Quiet!

Now, I'm taking you back to jail. No, you're not.

What's that supposed to mean? I got out of jail six weeks ago, and now I am a

free citizen. And look, here's my ticket for this museum, which means I have as

much right to walk around here as anyone.

Valid ticket, dude.

You can't have any more of my Captain Corn dogs. I can tell you that.

Who is me? No, I don't care if I... Oh, really? Oh.

Are you all right? What's going on?

Oh!

Oh!

You see that, kid?

I see what kind of a jerk she is.

You know what? I can't believe you're a jewel thief.

You told me you're an Olympic gymnast.

Yeah. I lied.

Oh.

Lying too, huh?

Whatever, Heather.

You want to walk around this museum?

Fine. You want to look at some stools and or jewels?

Go for it.

But don't even think about trying to steal the Neil Diamond.

I won't.

Good. Good.

I'm just going to do it. Fine. Whatever.

Wait, what?

I'm going to steal the Neil Diamond before the museum closes tonight. And

there's not one thing either of you can do to stop me.

I really wanted her to be a gymnast

Man, she makes me so... Oh, oh.

Look at this guy.

He's probably gonna flirt with her like I did.

Watch. Bet she's gonna tell him she's a gymnast, too.

Hey! Hey, yo! Dude!

My man!

Not a gymnast!

Duh.

I'm gonna enter my Captain Carndog recipe in a contest.

Yo, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know, like an appetizer recipe contest where the winner can win, like,

Like a boat or something cool. Okay, hang on a second. I can't take this.

Hey.

I'd enter my Captain Corndog recipe in a contest.

So, later, you maybe want to grab some coffee? Get some avocado toast?

Maybe, yeah. That sounds pretty cool.

Hey, hey.

Hey, sorry.

I'm just a dudey dude.

I just want you to know that this girl's a thief.

Yeah, and an ex -con.

She's been in and out of jail like six times.

So, she's bad news.

So, do you want to get some avocado toast?

Yeah, I would. But first, I got to steal a Neil Diamond.

Oh.

Okay.

Well, I guess you'll be paying for the avocado toast then.

I guess so.

Mine was a... person toast an avocado.

No, no, no.

You toast bread, then spread avocado on the bread.

Ugh. You Americans are animals.

Slow cooker.

Hey. Maybe a scuba gear or tree set. Ma 'am, please walk away.

What's your deal?

That thief Heather keeps saying that she's going to steal the diamond.

Oh, yeah?

Well, good luck to her.

Because I'm not ticking my eyes off this baby.

Hey, Captain Man, can I have a Captain Corn Dog?

Well, you sure can, buddy.

In fact, think about entering the recipe in a contest.

I like to make them wiggle like this.

See that?

There they are!

Hi, Captain Man and Kid Danger!

Well...

She must have heard about the Captain Corndog.

You guys heard about the Corndogs?

No. We're here to watch Heather Bogart try to steal the Neil Diamond.

Wait. How do you know she's going to try and steal it? She posted a video about

it. Here, look.

What's up?

I'm going to steal the Neil Diamond.

Well, that was to the point.

At what, the screen?

Yeah,

the screen.

What'd you see?

Heather.

Whispering to those photographers.

Hey, you guys want to go take some us fees in the gift shop?

Okay, walk with me.

Hey guys, can we get a couple of you fees?

You mean pictures of us? Yeah. Oh, yes, please. Why not? Let me just adjust my

hair. Let's get the Captain Cardogs in there. They're the real heroes here.

two.

That was bright.

My eyes, I can't see.

Neither can I.

I think that was hypergamma light.

What is hypergamma light?

It's a new technology.

It's as bright as the three suns of Jupiter. It makes it so that you

cannot see.

Whoa. And it even works on Captain Man?

Yeah, yeah. Look, if you're watching the same show I am.

What happened?

Oh, see?

Those photographers just busted you and everyone in this room with hyper gamma

light, which means you won't be seeing anything for the next two hours.

See? Nailed it.

Oh, yeah, Heather.

Kid Danger and I might not be able to see, but we can still punch!

Hey,

Kid! I think I hit Heather! Or maybe one of her photographers!

Kid! Kid!

You hit me!

Oh!

Attention!

Attention from Captain Man!

I cannot see!

We cannot see!

So, if you are not a criminal, Please stand back while Kid Danger and I locate

the perpetrators.

Oh, my God,

what's happening?

Captain Man and Kid Danger can't see.

And Heather's trying to steal the diamond.

We saved the Neil Diamond.

Here you go, man.