Original subtitles

What? What?

Yeah.

I gotta go to work, but I'm not feeling too good. Is there any orange juice?

I think we're out.

So.

We're all sick?

Well... No, I'm fine.

I'm not sick, and I'm going to play in the dad -mitten tournament.

Wait, what's dad -mitten?

It's a bad -mitten tournament for dads only.

So mom can't play.

Mom doesn't care.

Mom, I'm ready.

Oh, baby, come on. You were up sick all night.

You can't go.

Yeah,

I still can't go.

mom what a big deal Glozella is?

It's a big deal.

What's Glozella?

It's a huge music festival and it's in Swellview this year and Glozella's

hosting it and I love music and Glozella so I'm going!

Piper, I'm sorry but you are too sick to go to Glozella.

Mom! And you are too sick to play nerd tennis.

Why? And you are too sick to go to work.

Come on.

My boss is expecting me to do a hard day's work.

And you're saying I should just sit at home and chill and relax?

Yeah.

Okay.

I just gotta call my boss and tell him I'm not coming in.

I usually make my calls outside.

On the porch.

By myself. Okay.

Hey, Ray.

Ray!

Hey, you're supposed to be getting to work now. Why aren't you here?

Uh, because I can't commit to work. I'm sick.

Oh, so you're in the hospital.

Uh, well, no, I'm not in the hospital, but I'm not feeling that good. Patrick,

we're crime fighters.

And since criminals don't blow off work when they're sick, neither do Captain

Man and Kid Danger.

You catching my wave?

Ray! I mean, you ever seen me blow off work? Okay, that's not fair.

Why is it not fair? Because you've been indestructible since you were eight. You

can't get sick.

That's right, so be more like me.

Look, my mom says I can't come into work, so... Your mom?

Yeah.

Want me to come talk to her?

Okay, you know what? I'll be there in ten minutes.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

That's nice.

Look at me.

Hey, everybody.

Hi, Audrey.

No sneezing.

Hey, you sick, too?

No, I'm just collecting a giant pile of dirty tissues.

That's gross.

Hey, everybody.

Hey. Hey, what's up? Since it's Saturday morning, look what I brought.

Cupcake.

Oh, sweet.

Hey,

Henry, grab me one, would you?

Uh, yeah, sure.

Dang it, Schwoz.

Oh, the cupcake.

Everything's fine.

What's going on with him?

I don't know.

He's acting kind of... Am I going to have to listen to that all day?

Hey, you know my whole family's sick too?

No. Jasper, how are you feeling?

Great. Just get a little tired of holding these paints.

Higher.

Hello.

So, uh, did anyone here recently go into my science laboratory?

Well, yeah.

You sent me, Charlotte, and Jasper there on Thursday.

To put labels on your beakers?

Okay. Well, I think I did a bad thing.

What did you do?

Well, you know how I've always wanted to be famous?

By curing some terrible disease?

Yeah.

So I figured this is the way to come up with a cure for us to create my own

terrible disease.

What?

Classic Schwoz.

Hold on, hold on.

Are you saying that you think we have that disease that you created?

Well...

Yeah, Schwoz, you don't know why they're sick.

You're not a doctor.

I know what I'm talking about.

Look at Henry's pinky fingers.

Oh, yeah, why are they green?

It's one of the symptoms of my disease.

Ah! My pinkies are green, too.

Wait, let me see.

Yeah, you both have my disease.

What about Jasper?

He was with us.

He touched your beakers.

Does he have your disease?

Let me see here.

Jasper is clean.

No disease.

Well, we have it. Why doesn't he?

I don't know that Jasper doesn't have it. He should.

My disease is very contagious.

Well, what do Henry and...

Yeah, and what about my family? I can answer that.

Schwoz, you better come up with a cure for your stupid disease.

Okay. And until he does, Henry, since you're both contagious, you and

are going to have to be quarantined in your house with your family.

What is quarantine?

It means that they all have to stay inside so they don't spread the disease

the normal people as well, view.

But, well, what about you?

Don't worry about me.

Old Uncle Ray's indestructible, which means... can't get sick.

I don't know.

What?

It all just kind of happened. I wanted an after -school job, but then an

indestructible superhero hired me to be his sidekick.

Now we blow bubbles and fight crime.

Feels good.

sick as you. You don't understand. My head, like... Oh, it, like, aches.

Okay, that's called a headache.

Well, I don't like it.

Okay,

how's everyone doing?

How are we doing?

Look at our fingers.

Nothing to worry about.

I don't get this.

I'm indestructible. How's your freakish disease making me sick?

I guess I'm just a really good at creating freakish diseases.

So you're positive we're not going to die?

Of course.

Well, at least not until all of your fingers and thumbs turn green. What? How

can we die?

Look, you all just go inside so I can get back to working on the cure.

Wait, but what if Henry's parents try to leave the house?

Don't worry. I brought pork to guard the door.

So's my boss.

That's right, but... But I'm not too sick to notice a pretty lid like...

Oh, I need my pills.

Get my house!

Oh, come on.

Look, honey. Their fingers are turning green, too.

Yeah. Well, that's why I'm taking us all to the doctor.

You can't. Right, right, right, right. Mom.

Dad, Piper, this is... My name is Dr.

Schwarzwald.

Yeah,

that. He's from the... The Swellview County Health Department.

That's right.

I'm sorry, but you must all be quarantined.

Quarantined? Yes. You see, little girl, when people get upset tom -toms,

sometimes they have... Will you quit talking to me like I'm an idiot?

we have to stay here, in this house, until he says we're cured.

Uh, yes, that's right.

Okay, sorry, Dr.

Schwenkelson.

Yeah, Mom, we're contagious.

We can't risk infecting other people.

Hey, where'd that bratty little...

Yeah, I know that.

Well, can you explain what you're doing to me?

Okay. I'm examining you so I can find out why you didn't get sick, and that

I can cure the other peoples.

Oh, okay, now I get it.

Yeah, because I don't get down for you.

Now, I need to take a tiny bit of your blood so I can examine it.

Well, okay.

Now, this might hurt just a lot.

What do you mean by just a laugh?

Did you feel that?

Yeah, I felt it. Good.

Now I will take a little bit of your blood.

And now... What are you doing now?

I'm putting some of your blood into this plasmiotic fluid.

And if it's flammable, we have our cure.

So now you can make a cure for Henry and everybody?

Well, with one gallon of your blood, I can make enough cure for

two peoples.

But we need to cure six peoples.

Yeah, I'm going to need a lot more of your blood.

But you already took a whole gallon. I don't think my body has much more blood

to give.

Hey, who's the doctor here?

No one.

True.

Here.

Eat this raw meat.

in my fingers.

Yeah,

go for a spaz. Hello?

Hi, Henry.

I'm almost ready with the cure.

I just need a little more blood from Jasper. No!

I just need a little bit more of your blood.

But I don't think there's any more blood in me I can spare.

Sure there is.

What are you doing?

Speeding you to get more blood to come out. What?

Come on.

You're too thick. But I'm so hungry, I gotta eat something.

Hey.

Hey, what's wrong with my mouth?

What's wrong with my mouth?

Listen. Hey, buddy, listen.

Listen. Listen.

Schwoz told me that one of the final symptoms of his disease is

lockjaw.

Well, you can't eat if you can't open your mouth.

my jaw again.

Oh, man.

How are you feeling?

I think I'm okay.

Yeah. I'm okay, too.

Didn't ask you.

Okay.

Mom or Dad, which one of you is going to drive me to Glozella?

After what we've all just been through?

Are you batty? We are not driving you to Glozella.

Fine. Then I'll drive myself.

No, wait. Come on.

Piper. Piper, you are not driving my car. You are too young to drive. I don't

even know how to drive.

Phew.

Crazy day, right?

Hey, let's go talk outside.